1 00:00:00,050 --> 00:00:02,990 I watched them put my body onto the operating table and 2 00:00:02,990 --> 00:00:06,590 then I guess I blacked out. 3 00:00:06,620 --> 00:00:07,430 I don't know. 4 00:00:07,480 --> 00:00:12,080 The next thing I remember I was in a room and I could see 5 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:15,440 my grandmother who I knew was my grandma because I knew my 6 00:00:15,670 --> 00:00:19,480 grandma when she was alive and another woman, and they 7 00:00:19,480 --> 00:00:23,600 were standing around what I describe as a well table. 8 00:00:26,810 --> 00:00:29,600 My guest today is Julie Northway, who had a near 9 00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:32,810 death experience during a difficult pregnancy and met 10 00:00:32,810 --> 00:00:35,750 her deceased grandmother amongst other people. 11 00:00:36,170 --> 00:00:38,900 Julie, welcome and thank you so much for coming 12 00:00:38,900 --> 00:00:39,650 on the show today. 13 00:00:40,205 --> 00:00:41,075 Thank you for having me. 14 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:44,150 Julie, could we start with a little of the background of 15 00:00:44,150 --> 00:00:47,690 your life and then tell us what happened during your NDE. 16 00:00:48,490 --> 00:00:48,940 Yeah. 17 00:00:49,345 --> 00:00:52,105 I've actually had two near death experiences. 18 00:00:52,445 --> 00:00:55,595 The first one was the 2007 and the second one was 19 00:00:55,625 --> 00:01:00,105 again related to a pregnancy with my son in 2009. 20 00:01:00,595 --> 00:01:03,225 So I was in my twenties for the first one and 21 00:01:03,445 --> 00:01:06,859 in my thirties or late twenties for the second one. 22 00:01:07,309 --> 00:01:09,889 Before my first pregnancy in 2007 I was 23 00:01:09,889 --> 00:01:11,299 really very healthy. 24 00:01:11,609 --> 00:01:13,769 I didn't have any sort of issues. 25 00:01:13,769 --> 00:01:14,429 I was very active. 26 00:01:15,229 --> 00:01:18,349 And this was all very unexpected. 27 00:01:18,709 --> 00:01:23,284 The pregnancy started off pretty normal and then 28 00:01:23,614 --> 00:01:25,384 went downhill really fast. 29 00:01:25,384 --> 00:01:28,774 It wasn't something that I was expecting to happen. 30 00:01:28,774 --> 00:01:29,944 That's a weird thing to say, right? 31 00:01:29,944 --> 00:01:34,244 But I wasn't expecting to be dying in my twenties. 32 00:01:34,244 --> 00:01:35,714 I'm 42 now. 33 00:01:35,714 --> 00:01:38,374 So it's definitely affected my life and 34 00:01:38,884 --> 00:01:40,864 changed my perspective on how I do things. 35 00:01:40,864 --> 00:01:44,554 And I think I probably would've gone down a different 36 00:01:44,554 --> 00:01:45,754 path had it not happened. 37 00:01:45,754 --> 00:01:47,984 Not a bad path, but just different. 38 00:01:48,394 --> 00:01:50,884 So it's affected who I am and how I view the world. 39 00:01:51,284 --> 00:01:53,944 Let's start with the first nde since they're 40 00:01:53,944 --> 00:01:55,114 fairly close together. 41 00:01:55,144 --> 00:01:56,984 Can you tell us what happened there? 42 00:01:57,434 --> 00:02:02,299 So the first one I was pregnant with my daughter. 43 00:02:02,299 --> 00:02:04,909 At about 21 weeks 44 00:02:04,909 --> 00:02:09,829 I got an infection and that it was MRSA. 45 00:02:10,229 --> 00:02:13,199 And that went septic and I went into septic shock. 46 00:02:13,729 --> 00:02:17,480 They had to do an emergency D&C on me. 47 00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:24,389 And during the emergency D&C I flatlined and at that 48 00:02:24,389 --> 00:02:29,480 time, I, from what I remember of what happened before my 49 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:34,065 near death experience I was taken to the operating room. 50 00:02:34,464 --> 00:02:38,125 And I remember screaming, but I couldn't have been 51 00:02:38,130 --> 00:02:41,194 screaming because at that point the infection was 52 00:02:41,194 --> 00:02:44,374 in my lungs, so I couldn't breathe without assistance. 53 00:02:44,824 --> 00:02:49,039 So I remember screaming at the doctors, To not, cuz they 54 00:02:49,039 --> 00:02:50,299 were moving me around, right? 55 00:02:50,299 --> 00:02:53,329 They were moving me from one table to another and 56 00:02:53,334 --> 00:02:56,329 I remember watching them and screaming at them 57 00:02:56,329 --> 00:02:57,980 to not move my body. 58 00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:02,660 And then they obviously didn't hear what I was saying and I 59 00:03:02,665 --> 00:03:06,050 was looking at myself, which I obviously couldn't have 60 00:03:06,050 --> 00:03:09,290 been doing, but it wasn't registering like it, it all 61 00:03:09,290 --> 00:03:13,804 seemed very, normal, not normal, but it didn't seem 62 00:03:13,804 --> 00:03:15,335 like something was amiss. 63 00:03:15,394 --> 00:03:17,884 It just seemed like the doctors weren't 64 00:03:17,884 --> 00:03:18,754 listening to me. 65 00:03:18,855 --> 00:03:22,605 Once they moved me from one table to another table, and 66 00:03:22,605 --> 00:03:26,325 it's weird because I felt the table was metal, the one 67 00:03:26,325 --> 00:03:29,504 they moved me onto, and I could feel it, I could feel 68 00:03:29,514 --> 00:03:31,164 the cold metal in my body. 69 00:03:31,584 --> 00:03:34,414 But I was looking at it, if that makes sense. 70 00:03:34,464 --> 00:03:37,374 I think like when you hear of phantom limbs and things 71 00:03:37,374 --> 00:03:40,384 like that, I've never had a phantom limb, but when 72 00:03:40,384 --> 00:03:43,381 people describe that, that's the same sensation. 73 00:03:43,941 --> 00:03:47,671 And I watched them put my body onto the operating table and 74 00:03:47,671 --> 00:03:51,271 then I guess I blacked out. 75 00:03:51,301 --> 00:03:52,111 I don't know. 76 00:03:52,161 --> 00:03:56,751 The next thing I remember I was, I don't even wanna 77 00:03:56,751 --> 00:03:59,121 say waking up because I don't remember being asleep. 78 00:03:59,121 --> 00:04:04,011 I was just all of a sudden there and I was in a room and 79 00:04:04,011 --> 00:04:07,281 I could see my grandmother who I knew was my grandma because 80 00:04:07,281 --> 00:04:11,741 I knew my grandma when she was alive and another woman, and 81 00:04:11,741 --> 00:04:15,921 they were standing around what I describe as a well table. 82 00:04:16,131 --> 00:04:20,181 So a coffee table that's round. 83 00:04:20,691 --> 00:04:22,551 But if you look into the coffee table, light 84 00:04:22,556 --> 00:04:23,421 was coming out of it. 85 00:04:23,901 --> 00:04:27,228 So it was like a circular well, that light was 86 00:04:27,478 --> 00:04:29,248 coming out of that they were standing around. 87 00:04:30,088 --> 00:04:32,708 And it was two women. 88 00:04:32,708 --> 00:04:35,528 So my grandmother and another woman who I didn't recognize. 89 00:04:36,023 --> 00:04:39,973 But who felt very familiar and very comforting. 90 00:04:40,093 --> 00:04:42,793 And I like to think that she's family. 91 00:04:42,823 --> 00:04:45,973 Like she felt like maybe another grandmother that 92 00:04:45,973 --> 00:04:50,718 I didn't know or someone else or maybe my husband's 93 00:04:50,723 --> 00:04:51,919 grandmother, I don't know. 94 00:04:52,498 --> 00:04:56,448 But she was holding my baby, which who I just lost and I 95 00:04:56,448 --> 00:04:59,658 didn't really understand or know that I just lost her. 96 00:05:00,108 --> 00:05:02,828 But the woman that was with my grandma was holding 97 00:05:02,828 --> 00:05:07,011 her in like a 1970s style blanket, like the type of 98 00:05:07,011 --> 00:05:09,556 blanket that they used to put in hotel rooms in the 99 00:05:09,561 --> 00:05:10,846 eighties and the seventies. 100 00:05:11,356 --> 00:05:13,606 And so my baby was wrapped up in that blanket and 101 00:05:13,606 --> 00:05:18,956 she was holding her and it was comforting and very 102 00:05:19,756 --> 00:05:20,926 like being with family. 103 00:05:21,026 --> 00:05:24,746 The woman that I didn't recognize, she was very broad. 104 00:05:24,816 --> 00:05:27,396 And I like to compare her to Rosie the Riveter 105 00:05:27,396 --> 00:05:27,966 and I don't know, 106 00:05:27,966 --> 00:05:30,427 being in Australia if that is a reference that makes sense. 107 00:05:30,866 --> 00:05:35,916 But Rosie the Riveter was a a character that they 108 00:05:35,916 --> 00:05:39,756 used to use to promote war efforts at home. 109 00:05:39,816 --> 00:05:42,516 She was like a woman that worked in factories, right? 110 00:05:42,816 --> 00:05:45,456 And she wore like a bandana and she was really strong 111 00:05:45,456 --> 00:05:48,636 and she would work in the factories and make, I don't 112 00:05:48,636 --> 00:05:51,906 know, airplane rivets for the planes that went to Europe. 113 00:05:52,006 --> 00:05:54,496 And that's the sort of the vibe I got from this woman. 114 00:05:54,496 --> 00:05:59,506 Like 1940s tough lady or something like that. 115 00:05:59,506 --> 00:06:02,246 Not in a tough beat you up type of sense, but tough 116 00:06:02,246 --> 00:06:05,536 as in a strong woman who was also very comforting. 117 00:06:05,586 --> 00:06:07,986 So we were together. 118 00:06:08,066 --> 00:06:11,206 We were communicating, but there wasn't talking, and 119 00:06:11,206 --> 00:06:12,646 I didn't question anything. 120 00:06:12,696 --> 00:06:15,486 I think that was the oddest bit, is I just accepted 121 00:06:15,486 --> 00:06:16,626 everything as it was. 122 00:06:16,926 --> 00:06:18,516 It all felt very real. 123 00:06:18,566 --> 00:06:20,186 It was more real than this is real. 124 00:06:20,696 --> 00:06:24,936 And the conversation was going back and forth, but 125 00:06:24,941 --> 00:06:27,516 there just weren't any words and it just made sense. 126 00:06:28,296 --> 00:06:33,011 We mostly spoke about my daughter because and I've 127 00:06:33,011 --> 00:06:38,101 explained this to other people before my, my instinct, my 128 00:06:38,191 --> 00:06:42,901 maternal instinct was so on high alert and I felt like I 129 00:06:42,901 --> 00:06:47,221 was still maybe one foot in the living and one foot there. 130 00:06:47,701 --> 00:06:53,362 And my maternal instincts were really needing to 131 00:06:53,367 --> 00:06:56,601 be with my baby and they weren't letting me hold her. 132 00:06:56,601 --> 00:06:59,486 And they were saying that we have to be apart and that they 133 00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:01,016 were gonna take care of her. 134 00:07:01,406 --> 00:07:02,756 But I had to go back. 135 00:07:03,556 --> 00:07:07,416 And I was having trouble processing that, and 136 00:07:07,826 --> 00:07:08,966 there wasn't a rush. 137 00:07:09,056 --> 00:07:13,096 It didn't feel like there was a time limit for how long I 138 00:07:13,096 --> 00:07:14,416 could stay there or anything. 139 00:07:14,416 --> 00:07:16,671 They were just saying, no, this isn't how 140 00:07:16,931 --> 00:07:17,262 it's gonna work. 141 00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:19,421 You're gonna need to go back. 142 00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:22,091 We're gonna stay here, we're gonna take care of her. 143 00:07:22,781 --> 00:07:25,581 And it felt like I was there for a really long time. 144 00:07:26,381 --> 00:07:32,151 And I wasn't taken away from them until I could 145 00:07:32,151 --> 00:07:33,681 be, if that makes sense. 146 00:07:33,681 --> 00:07:35,481 So we were there for a long time. 147 00:07:35,481 --> 00:07:36,831 It was really beautiful. 148 00:07:36,921 --> 00:07:40,801 It was really comforting and it was almost like 149 00:07:41,651 --> 00:07:48,256 waves or pulsations of comfort and it was just. 150 00:07:49,056 --> 00:07:52,226 I don't know how to almost like an echo of comfort and 151 00:07:52,686 --> 00:07:54,006 we didn't leave the room. 152 00:07:54,096 --> 00:07:56,646 We were always in that and it wasn't really a room 153 00:07:56,646 --> 00:07:58,746 cuz there wasn't a ceiling, like it was more like a 154 00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:00,906 cave with a well in it. 155 00:08:01,176 --> 00:08:03,807 And it just, it's just where we were and we 156 00:08:03,812 --> 00:08:06,836 didn't leave that place until I was taken away. 157 00:08:07,406 --> 00:08:10,466 But we were just there together, being 158 00:08:10,466 --> 00:08:11,576 with my daughter. 159 00:08:11,756 --> 00:08:14,066 Not allowed to hold her, but being with her. 160 00:08:14,606 --> 00:08:17,366 Being told that it was gonna be okay and they were 161 00:08:17,366 --> 00:08:21,536 gonna watch her, and that I needed to move forward 162 00:08:21,541 --> 00:08:23,786 and I wasn't given a why I needed to go forward. 163 00:08:23,791 --> 00:08:26,066 I wasn't given a why I couldn't stay there. 164 00:08:26,336 --> 00:08:29,546 It was just, this isn't what you're doing right now. 165 00:08:30,346 --> 00:08:33,076 So I'm just gonna pause there, see if you have any questions 166 00:08:33,076 --> 00:08:35,716 because then they took me out and I'll get into that. 167 00:08:35,716 --> 00:08:40,151 One I have is when you say they didn't tell you why you 168 00:08:40,151 --> 00:08:43,761 had to go, did you actually ask why can't I stay? 169 00:08:44,501 --> 00:08:46,781 No, I didn't ask too many questions. 170 00:08:46,781 --> 00:08:48,341 I was very demanding. 171 00:08:48,726 --> 00:08:51,396 I was more like, I'm going to stay, and they would be 172 00:08:51,396 --> 00:08:53,346 like, no, you have to go. 173 00:08:53,606 --> 00:08:56,946 Sometimes people have asked me what questions did you ask? 174 00:08:56,946 --> 00:08:58,806 Or Did you get answers for this, or the other thing? 175 00:08:59,361 --> 00:09:00,621 I didn't care. 176 00:09:00,681 --> 00:09:03,771 All I cared about was my daughter and being with my 177 00:09:03,771 --> 00:09:08,271 daughter and what I was gonna have to do to protect her or 178 00:09:08,271 --> 00:09:09,711 make sure she was protected. 179 00:09:10,011 --> 00:09:13,016 Like the questions of the universe or the whys 180 00:09:13,016 --> 00:09:16,466 I couldn't go or things like that were not on 181 00:09:16,471 --> 00:09:17,086 the top of my list. 182 00:09:17,496 --> 00:09:20,426 So yeah, it was more like, I'm gonna stay here with 183 00:09:20,426 --> 00:09:24,826 you, and they would be like, no, that's not gonna happen. 184 00:09:25,216 --> 00:09:28,466 So it was, and again, with all the love. 185 00:09:28,466 --> 00:09:31,706 It wasn't demanding or angry or anything like that. 186 00:09:31,756 --> 00:09:33,736 It was just not what was gonna happen. 187 00:09:33,976 --> 00:09:38,176 So they basically waited until you were okay to go 188 00:09:38,176 --> 00:09:39,316 and that's when you went. 189 00:09:39,316 --> 00:09:42,136 But there wasn't any pressure to go, you just 190 00:09:42,196 --> 00:09:42,886 knew that we were gonna 191 00:09:42,951 --> 00:09:45,381 no, and it was And just, I've heard other people say 192 00:09:45,381 --> 00:09:50,421 this too, time didn't really exist, so it wasn't like that, 193 00:09:50,421 --> 00:09:53,811 that feeling of you have until noon or you have until 194 00:09:53,811 --> 00:09:55,011 the sun sets or whatever. 195 00:09:55,401 --> 00:10:00,351 There wasn't that, there wasn't that ticking time bomb. 196 00:10:00,731 --> 00:10:03,821 So I felt like I was there with them for a very 197 00:10:03,821 --> 00:10:06,031 long duration of time, even though I did have 198 00:10:06,031 --> 00:10:07,051 to go at a certain point. 199 00:10:07,851 --> 00:10:08,181 Okay. 200 00:10:08,181 --> 00:10:10,981 I assume that at some point you came back and 201 00:10:11,101 --> 00:10:13,231 what was your experience like of coming back? 202 00:10:13,411 --> 00:10:18,761 So what happened was when it was time to go, another 203 00:10:19,211 --> 00:10:22,211 person, another, I don't, he didn't feel human. 204 00:10:22,261 --> 00:10:23,251 I don't know what he was. 205 00:10:23,711 --> 00:10:25,511 He came into the room. 206 00:10:25,571 --> 00:10:28,091 He was wearing a long coat, like a trench coat, 207 00:10:28,631 --> 00:10:30,851 and he didn't really have facial features. 208 00:10:31,551 --> 00:10:32,831 But he wasn't scary. 209 00:10:32,831 --> 00:10:35,171 He wasn't like, when I say he didn't have a face, 210 00:10:35,171 --> 00:10:37,596 people are like, ah, but he wasn't frightening. 211 00:10:37,596 --> 00:10:39,426 He was, again, very comforting. 212 00:10:39,916 --> 00:10:43,066 And he came in and communicated to me that 213 00:10:43,066 --> 00:10:44,596 I had to leave with him. 214 00:10:45,066 --> 00:10:49,526 I left with him and again, I blacked out or I had the same 215 00:10:49,526 --> 00:10:54,726 sensation anyways that I had between the operating room 216 00:10:54,786 --> 00:10:56,706 and the room with the well. 217 00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:57,970 It was the same sensation. 218 00:10:57,975 --> 00:10:59,050 I was with him. 219 00:10:59,470 --> 00:11:01,445 He said we had to go and I blacked out and then I 220 00:11:01,445 --> 00:11:03,035 was just in another place. 221 00:11:03,785 --> 00:11:07,835 And this place was much bigger. 222 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:11,665 It wasn't like a room, it was when they say your life 223 00:11:11,665 --> 00:11:13,045 flashes before your eyes. 224 00:11:13,495 --> 00:11:16,225 It was like that, except it was a landscape. 225 00:11:16,825 --> 00:11:22,815 And instead of seeing images of places I've been and things 226 00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:27,065 that I did, I saw structures like on a landscape. 227 00:11:27,555 --> 00:11:32,855 And each structure was built by relationships 228 00:11:32,855 --> 00:11:33,875 I had with people. 229 00:11:34,025 --> 00:11:38,045 If for my husband for example, for my husband, 230 00:11:38,075 --> 00:11:41,535 there was a really strong structure and it had this 231 00:11:41,535 --> 00:11:46,665 radiating light and it was very big and complicated. 232 00:11:46,665 --> 00:11:49,995 And cuz we've been together for a long time and there's 233 00:11:49,995 --> 00:11:50,656 a lot of love there. 234 00:11:51,535 --> 00:11:56,925 So it was this grand structure and then for people that 235 00:11:57,195 --> 00:12:01,265 might have had like a smaller piece of my life, a teacher 236 00:12:01,265 --> 00:12:03,965 that I had in kindergarten or something, it might have 237 00:12:03,965 --> 00:12:06,905 been a smaller structure, but still glowing and still 238 00:12:06,905 --> 00:12:10,055 beautiful or maybe a little bridge or a little cottage. 239 00:12:10,855 --> 00:12:14,185 And then people that I've been cruel to or were cruel to me, 240 00:12:14,755 --> 00:12:18,835 there was like dark crumbling, not radiating structures. 241 00:12:19,195 --> 00:12:25,615 So it was like a landscape of these magic Legos that some 242 00:12:25,615 --> 00:12:29,275 were glowing, some were dark, some were grand, some were 243 00:12:29,275 --> 00:12:32,785 little, just little bridges, like anything you would see, 244 00:12:33,385 --> 00:12:35,905 but made out of these blocks. 245 00:12:36,295 --> 00:12:40,268 And every one of them we sort of looked at and explored. 246 00:12:40,898 --> 00:12:44,588 And again, time didn't really seem to matter, and 247 00:12:44,588 --> 00:12:47,968 each one of them introduced me to the relationship I 248 00:12:47,968 --> 00:12:51,718 built and the connection I made in life and how that's 249 00:12:51,718 --> 00:12:53,398 reflecting on the other side. 250 00:12:54,018 --> 00:12:57,108 So this is what you did with your life. 251 00:12:57,258 --> 00:12:58,788 Here it is visually. 252 00:12:59,388 --> 00:13:01,548 This is what your life looks like in the 253 00:13:01,548 --> 00:13:02,628 grand scheme of things. 254 00:13:03,348 --> 00:13:05,808 And the things that I did in my life that mattered 255 00:13:05,808 --> 00:13:10,178 were just connections I made with other conscious things. 256 00:13:10,418 --> 00:13:13,398 It wasn't a degree that I got or a job that I got, 257 00:13:13,398 --> 00:13:15,588 or a place that I visited. 258 00:13:15,588 --> 00:13:18,348 It was all people connections, pretty much. 259 00:13:18,348 --> 00:13:19,848 There might have been some animals in there, 260 00:13:19,848 --> 00:13:20,688 I can't remember. 261 00:13:20,688 --> 00:13:23,968 But for the, from what I understand, it was human 262 00:13:23,968 --> 00:13:29,658 connections that I made in life and how my behavior and 263 00:13:29,658 --> 00:13:34,363 my effort and interactions positively affected those 264 00:13:34,363 --> 00:13:37,153 people and how their interactions positively 265 00:13:37,183 --> 00:13:41,233 or negatively affected me and how that sort of 266 00:13:41,263 --> 00:13:43,093 reflected on the other side. 267 00:13:43,333 --> 00:13:47,293 So we just explored that and explored those different types 268 00:13:47,293 --> 00:13:52,203 of structures for again, like a long time, even though it's, 269 00:13:52,743 --> 00:13:54,063 it didn't feel long, right? 270 00:13:54,068 --> 00:13:56,823 And every time I mention time, whether it's in the 271 00:13:56,823 --> 00:14:00,873 room with the well or here, it's more, we did a lot 272 00:14:00,963 --> 00:14:02,643 than it took a long time. 273 00:14:02,673 --> 00:14:05,403 So we went through all those structures and we 274 00:14:05,408 --> 00:14:10,593 accomplished a lot of things, but the idea of it taking 275 00:14:10,598 --> 00:14:14,633 a long time wasn't really a thing, if that makes sense. 276 00:14:15,433 --> 00:14:21,323 So after we had gone through this sort of, what people 277 00:14:21,323 --> 00:14:24,203 call a life in review and looked at all these structures 278 00:14:24,323 --> 00:14:26,033 he took me to a tree. 279 00:14:26,613 --> 00:14:31,353 Like a huge tree that was moving and like 280 00:14:31,353 --> 00:14:35,613 breathing and you could see like the tree growing. 281 00:14:35,793 --> 00:14:40,718 And it was going top to bottom and the branches 282 00:14:40,718 --> 00:14:43,688 were growing out and some of the branches were breaking 283 00:14:43,693 --> 00:14:44,948 and falling to the bottom. 284 00:14:45,233 --> 00:14:47,813 And the roots would pull those branches back in and pull 285 00:14:47,813 --> 00:14:49,043 it back up into the tree. 286 00:14:49,343 --> 00:14:54,493 And it was just like this circular cycle of this 287 00:14:54,493 --> 00:14:58,933 tree that was moving and growing and the branches 288 00:14:58,933 --> 00:15:01,823 were breaking, falling down, going back up and growing. 289 00:15:02,523 --> 00:15:05,983 And he stepped back, the guy with the coat and 290 00:15:06,033 --> 00:15:07,533 encouraged me to move forward. 291 00:15:07,533 --> 00:15:09,903 And I walked up to the tree and I reached out to touched 292 00:15:09,903 --> 00:15:14,268 it, and then I blacked out or whatever I was doing again. 293 00:15:14,688 --> 00:15:19,148 And the next thing you know, I was in the recovery room 294 00:15:19,718 --> 00:15:22,148 and the doctor was saying that they almost lost me. 295 00:15:22,163 --> 00:15:24,443 Yeah, that was the end of it. 296 00:15:24,863 --> 00:15:25,583 The tree. 297 00:15:25,993 --> 00:15:27,643 I'm fascinated by the tree. 298 00:15:27,643 --> 00:15:33,273 It is like you had a, an experience that made sense 299 00:15:33,273 --> 00:15:35,943 to you in terms of the way that your life was reviewed 300 00:15:35,943 --> 00:15:37,943 and it's a pretty common theme like the life review, 301 00:15:37,943 --> 00:15:40,393 but my understanding is it's really tailored to 302 00:15:40,393 --> 00:15:42,913 each individual person and almost how their mind works. 303 00:15:43,633 --> 00:15:44,713 So that part makes sense. 304 00:15:44,713 --> 00:15:47,863 But the tree is interesting as how there was a 305 00:15:47,863 --> 00:15:49,213 cyclical nature to it. 306 00:15:49,243 --> 00:15:53,083 Did you have any idea of why they took you 307 00:15:53,088 --> 00:15:54,073 there to show you that? 308 00:15:54,073 --> 00:15:56,173 Other than, oh, this is just something that's 309 00:15:56,173 --> 00:15:56,953 really interesting. 310 00:15:56,958 --> 00:15:58,123 Did you get a sense of that? 311 00:15:58,348 --> 00:16:00,958 Whatever it was, is what brought me back 312 00:16:00,958 --> 00:16:03,318 into the living right. 313 00:16:03,368 --> 00:16:07,028 I think I don't know for sure of any of this, but cuz once 314 00:16:07,028 --> 00:16:08,648 I touched it, I was back. 315 00:16:08,958 --> 00:16:12,098 But the whole concept of it felt like we're a 316 00:16:12,103 --> 00:16:15,578 family, basically everybody, everyone's related at 317 00:16:15,578 --> 00:16:20,708 some level, and we're all part of this organism, 318 00:16:20,918 --> 00:16:22,238 this single organism. 319 00:16:22,243 --> 00:16:26,213 And we all live our lives and then we die, and then we get 320 00:16:26,213 --> 00:16:29,903 pulled back up into it and reinvented and are another 321 00:16:29,903 --> 00:16:32,093 part of this single thing. 322 00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:35,248 So that's how I interpreted it. 323 00:16:35,648 --> 00:16:37,683 He didn't tell me what it was or anything. 324 00:16:37,683 --> 00:16:41,973 It was really more of just what came from inside of 325 00:16:41,973 --> 00:16:43,863 me, and that's how I saw it. 326 00:16:44,463 --> 00:16:48,123 Like I'm sure something in my life connected me to 327 00:16:48,123 --> 00:16:51,423 it or made it so that was something that I understood. 328 00:16:51,428 --> 00:16:55,953 But it was, it definitely was showing sort of life 329 00:16:55,953 --> 00:16:59,913 and death and that death really isn't the end of 330 00:16:59,913 --> 00:17:01,443 life, but part of it. 331 00:17:01,513 --> 00:17:03,193 They're both part of each other, right? 332 00:17:03,193 --> 00:17:08,073 They're both feeding into the same thing that, in this 333 00:17:08,073 --> 00:17:09,393 case looked like a tree. 334 00:17:09,493 --> 00:17:14,163 So after you came back, That must have been hard. 335 00:17:14,293 --> 00:17:15,163 What was that like? 336 00:17:15,328 --> 00:17:16,018 Yes. 337 00:17:16,048 --> 00:17:18,598 I lost my daughter, so I was a wreck. 338 00:17:18,698 --> 00:17:22,978 That on top of that, I had also lost my own life. 339 00:17:23,648 --> 00:17:25,498 And I didn't know how to grasp that. 340 00:17:25,888 --> 00:17:27,748 I wanted to be with my daughter. 341 00:17:28,558 --> 00:17:30,358 I was put in counseling and things like that. 342 00:17:30,718 --> 00:17:34,198 I was often asked if I was suicidal because I would 343 00:17:34,198 --> 00:17:37,018 want to be dead, but I didn't want to kill myself. 344 00:17:37,018 --> 00:17:39,328 I just wanted to go back to where I was with my daughter. 345 00:17:39,383 --> 00:17:42,793 And it was hard to communicate that without sounding like 346 00:17:42,798 --> 00:17:45,763 I wanted to kill myself, which really wasn't the case. 347 00:17:46,243 --> 00:17:49,033 It was a very difficult couple of years. 348 00:17:49,833 --> 00:17:53,823 Lots of depression, lots of just wanting to be back there 349 00:17:53,823 --> 00:17:58,113 with her and not feeling that I was in reality. 350 00:17:58,533 --> 00:18:03,103 Because that place was so much more real and vibrant 351 00:18:03,103 --> 00:18:06,283 and like colors were different and things just, it seemed 352 00:18:06,283 --> 00:18:08,953 like I had woken up when I was there and now I was 353 00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:12,373 back asleep and I just wanted to be awake again. 354 00:18:13,173 --> 00:18:18,483 I ended up having two more children, which have 355 00:18:18,513 --> 00:18:23,013 made my life obviously completely more worth living 356 00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:26,343 and made me understand why I needed to come back. 357 00:18:26,343 --> 00:18:29,883 Because if I hadn't come back, they wouldn't exist. 358 00:18:29,883 --> 00:18:32,343 And they're such an important part of who I am. 359 00:18:32,883 --> 00:18:35,723 And I'm sure they'll affect the world in a 360 00:18:35,723 --> 00:18:37,884 way that will change other people's lives too. 361 00:18:38,633 --> 00:18:44,543 But until I had my son, I really struggled with sort 362 00:18:44,543 --> 00:18:48,863 of day to day and finding meaning in like mundane 363 00:18:48,863 --> 00:18:50,003 things throughout life. 364 00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,003 But it's hard. 365 00:18:51,003 --> 00:18:54,003 I don't know if that's because I had a near death experience 366 00:18:54,003 --> 00:18:55,323 or because I lost my daughter. 367 00:18:55,373 --> 00:18:58,248 Like it's, it was other people I've spoken to that have 368 00:18:58,368 --> 00:19:03,468 had near death experiences come back and feel sometimes 369 00:19:03,518 --> 00:19:07,088 they have a renewed sense of life and they try all sorts 370 00:19:07,088 --> 00:19:10,398 of different new things and go places and meet people. 371 00:19:10,478 --> 00:19:11,798 Others have depression too. 372 00:19:11,828 --> 00:19:15,008 But I definitely feel like if I hadn't lost my 373 00:19:15,008 --> 00:19:17,408 daughter, it might have been a different story. 374 00:19:17,808 --> 00:19:21,283 I might have not gone into as deep of a depression. 375 00:19:21,323 --> 00:19:25,853 I don't blame the near death experience for the depression. 376 00:19:25,853 --> 00:19:28,193 I blame more that I lost my daughter. 377 00:19:28,403 --> 00:19:30,353 When you were having the life review with the 378 00:19:30,353 --> 00:19:33,273 structures representing each of your relationships 379 00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:37,619 and interactions, you mentioned that they were all 380 00:19:38,049 --> 00:19:39,159 to do with relationships. 381 00:19:39,159 --> 00:19:40,509 They weren't really to do with things that you 382 00:19:40,509 --> 00:19:41,739 accomplished or anything else. 383 00:19:41,739 --> 00:19:45,969 Did that change how you felt about what you wanted 384 00:19:45,969 --> 00:19:47,979 to do with your life when you, after you came back? 385 00:19:48,489 --> 00:19:50,940 And yes, it definitely did. 386 00:19:50,945 --> 00:19:54,209 I definitely focus more on the people in my life, my family. 387 00:19:54,539 --> 00:19:56,279 I cut toxic people out faster. 388 00:19:56,789 --> 00:20:02,049 I have stronger relationships with people that I love and 389 00:20:02,049 --> 00:20:06,189 who love me back and have these connections with. 390 00:20:06,649 --> 00:20:09,829 My goals are more family oriented. 391 00:20:09,859 --> 00:20:14,099 I was always very, I was like, the A student, the 392 00:20:14,099 --> 00:20:17,939 teacher suck up, the person that always did that. 393 00:20:17,999 --> 00:20:21,269 And same college, and then my career, it was the same thing. 394 00:20:21,324 --> 00:20:22,884 I was moving very fast. 395 00:20:22,914 --> 00:20:25,524 I was always going for the promotion before I 396 00:20:25,524 --> 00:20:26,574 probably should have. 397 00:20:26,574 --> 00:20:31,454 I was I think at the time in 2007, I was traveling 398 00:20:31,484 --> 00:20:33,794 80% of the time for work. 399 00:20:34,304 --> 00:20:37,814 So not fun travel, boring travel and just 400 00:20:37,819 --> 00:20:38,864 those sorts of things. 401 00:20:39,404 --> 00:20:42,274 And then after it happened I stopped the work travel. 402 00:20:42,984 --> 00:20:47,059 I still love traveling, but just not to hotels and 403 00:20:47,279 --> 00:20:53,669 and I, yeah, when I had my kids, I, everything I do is 404 00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:56,549 in somehow, even the things I do for myself, somehow 405 00:20:56,599 --> 00:20:58,129 it winds back to my kids. 406 00:20:58,369 --> 00:21:01,339 And I think, a lot of mothers probably that's the case, but 407 00:21:01,589 --> 00:21:07,804 for me I don't think I had as much of that in me before I 408 00:21:07,804 --> 00:21:09,874 lost my daughter and my life. 409 00:21:09,874 --> 00:21:14,334 And now the connections I make with them are strong compared 410 00:21:14,334 --> 00:21:16,644 to, even compared to like my husband and my parents. 411 00:21:16,649 --> 00:21:20,734 I feel so connected to them that they're just 412 00:21:20,739 --> 00:21:22,064 incredibly important to me. 413 00:21:22,204 --> 00:21:27,234 My life and my goals are really much more about my 414 00:21:27,234 --> 00:21:31,574 two kids than about going for promotions as fast as 415 00:21:31,574 --> 00:21:33,854 I can or things like that. 416 00:21:33,904 --> 00:21:34,384 So yeah, 417 00:21:35,184 --> 00:21:37,969 Do you feel like you have a more balanced life now? 418 00:21:38,499 --> 00:21:39,519 Definitely. 419 00:21:39,569 --> 00:21:41,399 Maybe almost too homey. 420 00:21:41,449 --> 00:21:42,349 It I 421 00:21:42,899 --> 00:21:45,389 . I have left jobs that didn't have like work home 422 00:21:45,389 --> 00:21:46,679 life balance type things. 423 00:21:47,029 --> 00:21:50,299 And I don't take jobs that don't offer that sort of 424 00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:52,369 world and of availability. 425 00:21:53,169 --> 00:21:54,069 I save money. 426 00:21:54,069 --> 00:21:55,809 I don't wanna sound like I'm throwing money away, 427 00:21:55,809 --> 00:21:59,204 but if there's something I can do with my kids and 428 00:22:00,029 --> 00:22:03,459 like I have to throw out the idea of buying an expensive 429 00:22:03,479 --> 00:22:04,799 outfit or shoes or something. 430 00:22:04,799 --> 00:22:06,539 I definitely spend it on my kids. 431 00:22:06,929 --> 00:22:09,709 And again, I think a lot of mothers come to 432 00:22:09,709 --> 00:22:10,729 this conclusion, right? 433 00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:14,389 A lot of people that have children and love their 434 00:22:14,389 --> 00:22:17,619 children end up doing this with their children, but this, 435 00:22:18,169 --> 00:22:21,829 my reasoning for it is just what I saw on the other side. 436 00:22:22,219 --> 00:22:24,499 And other people might have other reasoning for it, 437 00:22:24,499 --> 00:22:27,229 but I think ultimately when people have kids, they know 438 00:22:27,229 --> 00:22:31,059 that for their internal happiness, they wanna 439 00:22:31,059 --> 00:22:32,319 make their children happy. 440 00:22:32,319 --> 00:22:33,184 And my husband too. 441 00:22:33,189 --> 00:22:35,554 My husband and I have a fantastic relationship. 442 00:22:35,824 --> 00:22:39,679 We've been together 23 years now and I don't know of 443 00:22:39,684 --> 00:22:41,509 course we fight, of course there's things like that, 444 00:22:41,699 --> 00:22:46,609 but he's just so important to me and his role in my 445 00:22:46,609 --> 00:22:49,749 life and our relationship. 446 00:22:50,549 --> 00:22:52,799 And what it's meant to me over the years has just 447 00:22:52,799 --> 00:22:54,179 been really important. 448 00:22:54,179 --> 00:22:59,129 So I put more of myself into that and it seems to work. 449 00:22:59,349 --> 00:23:01,269 I find this very inspirational, this. 450 00:23:01,419 --> 00:23:03,189 When I've started this channel, I didn't really 451 00:23:03,189 --> 00:23:04,329 know what was gonna happen. 452 00:23:04,329 --> 00:23:05,679 I just wanted to be able to tell people's 453 00:23:05,679 --> 00:23:07,049 stories and bring 454 00:23:07,079 --> 00:23:07,329 Yeah. 455 00:23:07,519 --> 00:23:08,409 awareness to people. 456 00:23:08,409 --> 00:23:13,279 But yeah, this is a, oh, this is a, it's a conversation 457 00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:15,499 that's bringing something out to me and making me 458 00:23:15,499 --> 00:23:19,129 realize how important children are and relationships are, 459 00:23:19,129 --> 00:23:21,229 and how some other things are perhaps not quite as 460 00:23:21,229 --> 00:23:23,209 important, and especially the. 461 00:23:23,584 --> 00:23:25,954 Especially that at some point they, they gr they 462 00:23:25,954 --> 00:23:26,824 grow up, they get old. 463 00:23:26,824 --> 00:23:28,714 They don't want to be, they don't wanna be 464 00:23:28,714 --> 00:23:28,924 Yeah. 465 00:23:28,954 --> 00:23:29,314 anymore 466 00:23:29,364 --> 00:23:30,954 And they have their own children and need to 467 00:23:30,954 --> 00:23:33,444 put their whole selves into that potentially. 468 00:23:33,444 --> 00:23:36,964 They're not gonna be able to put all of their energy and 469 00:23:36,969 --> 00:23:38,704 relationship energy into me. 470 00:23:38,709 --> 00:23:40,904 They're gonna have to put that into their partners 471 00:23:40,924 --> 00:23:44,944 or their children or their community that they put 472 00:23:44,944 --> 00:23:48,484 together for themselves that's important to them, and 473 00:23:48,694 --> 00:23:50,014 I'm sure that's gonna hurt. 474 00:23:50,014 --> 00:23:54,699 They can create their world and hopefully that'll 475 00:23:54,699 --> 00:23:56,169 expand mine as well. 476 00:23:56,169 --> 00:23:59,339 And yeah, that'll be something. 477 00:23:59,439 --> 00:24:00,939 And even outside of just children. 478 00:24:00,989 --> 00:24:03,509 All the relationships in my life, like just trying, 479 00:24:03,659 --> 00:24:07,469 and it's impossible to help everyone, and it's impossible 480 00:24:07,469 --> 00:24:10,939 to be like this perfect person, but just trying to 481 00:24:10,939 --> 00:24:15,559 be present enough most of the time to be kind to people 482 00:24:15,979 --> 00:24:21,549 and to not create these rotten connections and these 483 00:24:21,969 --> 00:24:25,389 negative pieces of life that you dwell on and think about 484 00:24:25,389 --> 00:24:29,859 and I dunno, create crumbling structures in the afterlife. 485 00:24:29,859 --> 00:24:35,174 Yeah, just trying to keep people reasonably respected in 486 00:24:35,174 --> 00:24:38,784 this life and when you can't, to cut that relationship 487 00:24:38,784 --> 00:24:42,324 off quickly and move forward and not dwell on it, I 488 00:24:42,324 --> 00:24:44,004 think has been important. 489 00:24:44,804 --> 00:24:48,259 Okay, so your second Ed, that's, I'll try that again. 490 00:24:48,319 --> 00:24:51,049 Your second NDE that occurred a couple of years 491 00:24:51,049 --> 00:24:52,039 after your first one. 492 00:24:52,069 --> 00:24:53,089 Could you tell us about that? 493 00:24:53,629 --> 00:24:56,119 Sure this, that this one was much less dramatic. 494 00:24:56,149 --> 00:24:59,839 I was getting prepped for a c-section with my first son. 495 00:24:59,839 --> 00:25:01,879 So this was the first pregnancy after I 496 00:25:01,879 --> 00:25:02,779 lost my daughter. 497 00:25:03,389 --> 00:25:06,959 And I had a reaction to the anesthesia used in my 498 00:25:06,959 --> 00:25:08,089 spinal for the C-section. 499 00:25:08,889 --> 00:25:12,519 The reaction stopped my heart and I flatlined again. 500 00:25:13,059 --> 00:25:18,684 The doctors did compressions on my chest to get me going. 501 00:25:19,224 --> 00:25:23,294 And basically what I saw is I felt swept out of my 502 00:25:23,294 --> 00:25:28,214 body and I was watching the doctors chaotically rush 503 00:25:28,219 --> 00:25:31,484 around the room and the one doctor get on top of me 504 00:25:31,489 --> 00:25:33,164 and do chest compressions. 505 00:25:33,624 --> 00:25:36,954 And they all I've told this to people before 506 00:25:36,954 --> 00:25:39,144 too, and I always feel weird saying it, but they 507 00:25:39,144 --> 00:25:42,594 all looked like Russian dancing bears like spinning 508 00:25:42,594 --> 00:25:45,084 around the operating table. 509 00:25:45,474 --> 00:25:48,894 And it was all very like a circus, like a weird circus. 510 00:25:49,474 --> 00:25:51,854 And it wasn't negative. 511 00:25:52,064 --> 00:25:55,454 I certainly didn't go to some loving, wonderful place 512 00:25:55,934 --> 00:25:57,194 like I did the first time. 513 00:25:57,199 --> 00:25:59,959 But at the very least it was entertaining. 514 00:25:59,989 --> 00:26:02,149 And yeah, I watched everything happen. 515 00:26:02,479 --> 00:26:04,039 The interesting thing about that one is 516 00:26:04,039 --> 00:26:05,969 when I came to when. 517 00:26:06,244 --> 00:26:08,474 I woke up the doctor was on me, so that 518 00:26:08,474 --> 00:26:09,284 was a little scary. 519 00:26:09,284 --> 00:26:12,614 But once the doctor was off me and I was back 520 00:26:12,614 --> 00:26:15,754 to realizing what just happened, I felt amazing. 521 00:26:15,784 --> 00:26:19,704 Like it felt like I had fallen and something 522 00:26:19,709 --> 00:26:20,604 terrible happened. 523 00:26:20,604 --> 00:26:24,234 But then someone lifted me up and I was completely fine. 524 00:26:24,234 --> 00:26:28,074 Like I felt ready to have that C-section and better than 525 00:26:28,074 --> 00:26:29,784 I had felt in a long time. 526 00:26:29,784 --> 00:26:31,094 And it was really good. 527 00:26:31,099 --> 00:26:35,044 And they sent me to the, ICU, the intensive care unit after 528 00:26:35,384 --> 00:26:37,604 to have my heart monitored to make sure I was okay. 529 00:26:37,604 --> 00:26:39,914 And I was just like in a great mood the whole time. 530 00:26:39,919 --> 00:26:41,804 And I was talking to the nurses and everything 531 00:26:41,804 --> 00:26:45,044 and they were just like, okay, she's fine. 532 00:26:45,044 --> 00:26:48,954 But it was, I was in a really good mood after that 533 00:26:48,954 --> 00:26:50,444 second near death experience. 534 00:26:50,734 --> 00:26:53,264 It's like you got energized while you were, while 535 00:26:53,314 --> 00:26:54,124 Yeah, it was 536 00:26:54,179 --> 00:26:54,499 realm. 537 00:26:54,999 --> 00:26:58,059 It was, yeah, it was like I got a zap of something 538 00:26:58,059 --> 00:27:01,299 and was able to come back to, and it was good. 539 00:27:01,449 --> 00:27:03,764 Because obviously the situation wasn't great cuz 540 00:27:03,944 --> 00:27:05,744 I was getting a C-section, it was like an emergency 541 00:27:05,744 --> 00:27:09,254 C-section, so I hadn't been feeling good and then all 542 00:27:09,254 --> 00:27:10,514 of a sudden I was fantastic. 543 00:27:10,514 --> 00:27:12,464 So it was all worth it. 544 00:27:12,984 --> 00:27:17,874 So have you had any changes in, have you had 545 00:27:17,874 --> 00:27:20,724 any special abilities that you've acquired that you 546 00:27:20,754 --> 00:27:23,074 might call, some people might call them paranormal. 547 00:27:23,074 --> 00:27:25,114 It doesn't really, whatever you'd like to 548 00:27:25,114 --> 00:27:26,704 call it, but anything like that has happened? 549 00:27:27,389 --> 00:27:30,239 So I've told, again, I don't know if these are 550 00:27:30,239 --> 00:27:34,529 abilities cuz they could l just be dreams, I don't know. 551 00:27:34,979 --> 00:27:38,429 But I do have dreams with people that have passed 552 00:27:38,429 --> 00:27:42,109 over and it's always in the same sort of place. 553 00:27:42,109 --> 00:27:43,249 It's always in a room. 554 00:27:43,919 --> 00:27:46,679 I can always tell it's one of those dreams because they have 555 00:27:46,769 --> 00:27:49,739 a flower, like they're either wearing a flower or they 556 00:27:49,739 --> 00:27:52,199 have a bouquet of flowers, or they're wearing like a 557 00:27:52,199 --> 00:27:53,729 Hawaiian shirt if it's a guy. 558 00:27:54,149 --> 00:27:56,669 But there's always a flower and there's always some 559 00:27:56,669 --> 00:27:57,589 chairs to sit and talk. 560 00:27:57,589 --> 00:27:59,602 And it's just like a visit. 561 00:28:00,132 --> 00:28:03,652 With my grandpa, someone I see a lot some of my 562 00:28:03,657 --> 00:28:05,422 husband's relatives I see. 563 00:28:05,422 --> 00:28:06,502 And I don't know who they are. 564 00:28:06,502 --> 00:28:06,952 And then I. 565 00:28:07,312 --> 00:28:09,772 Explain them the next day and he'll say, oh, that's, 566 00:28:09,822 --> 00:28:11,292 my uncle Chuck or whatever. 567 00:28:11,292 --> 00:28:15,462 And I've had these, I often have a lot of them 568 00:28:15,462 --> 00:28:18,072 right before someone is about to pass away. 569 00:28:18,702 --> 00:28:23,122 And yeah, and those are, I don't like to share those 570 00:28:23,122 --> 00:28:26,542 because they're hard for the people around me, but 571 00:28:26,992 --> 00:28:30,412 I usually see like people getting ready for them. 572 00:28:30,472 --> 00:28:33,072 Like their brothers or their mothers or whoever had passed 573 00:28:33,072 --> 00:28:36,062 before them are preparing things and I'm there standing 574 00:28:36,062 --> 00:28:39,062 around in the way and they're like, oh, we're getting 575 00:28:39,062 --> 00:28:43,447 this party together for so and and it's a celebration. 576 00:28:44,047 --> 00:28:48,127 And yeah, they usually pass in the day or two after that. 577 00:28:48,727 --> 00:28:50,632 And that's, I don't know. 578 00:28:50,682 --> 00:28:53,022 It's comforting to me, but I know it's probably 579 00:28:53,052 --> 00:28:54,912 not to some other people. 580 00:28:54,912 --> 00:28:59,862 I don't like to bring that up to family that often. 581 00:28:59,922 --> 00:29:03,352 But I also see a couple times a year, I have a 582 00:29:03,352 --> 00:29:09,412 dream or something where entities like the man in 583 00:29:09,412 --> 00:29:12,652 the trench coat come and they ask me a bunch of 584 00:29:12,652 --> 00:29:18,187 questions usually about aging and dying or generations. 585 00:29:18,487 --> 00:29:23,167 So oftentimes they'll show me like a mental image 586 00:29:23,167 --> 00:29:26,032 of my grandma and then a mental image of my mom 587 00:29:26,032 --> 00:29:27,322 and a mental image of me. 588 00:29:27,727 --> 00:29:31,357 And ask me, just explain like how they're different people. 589 00:29:31,957 --> 00:29:37,447 Cuz so like we see one woman here, are they different 590 00:29:37,447 --> 00:29:39,167 women or are they one woman? 591 00:29:39,697 --> 00:29:42,007 Are they the same person or are they three different 592 00:29:42,007 --> 00:29:43,087 people type of a thing. 593 00:29:43,687 --> 00:29:47,127 And then I explained to them that like in generations, 594 00:29:47,127 --> 00:29:50,127 like your blood passes down so you're sharing the same blood, 595 00:29:50,127 --> 00:29:53,097 but you're different people with different consciousness. 596 00:29:53,897 --> 00:29:57,017 So again, I don't know if it's a dream. 597 00:29:57,022 --> 00:29:59,417 I don't know if it's real, but it feels like that 598 00:29:59,417 --> 00:30:02,117 same, those same colors that I saw when I was on 599 00:30:02,117 --> 00:30:06,377 the other side, the same sensation, the same feeling 600 00:30:06,707 --> 00:30:07,577 when I have those dreams. 601 00:30:08,277 --> 00:30:11,037 And each time that occurs, do you have a 602 00:30:11,037 --> 00:30:11,907 different understanding? 603 00:30:11,907 --> 00:30:14,107 Do you have a different answer to that question? 604 00:30:14,107 --> 00:30:16,397 No, it's usually always the same, and they're 605 00:30:16,397 --> 00:30:18,317 always different entities. 606 00:30:18,317 --> 00:30:21,974 It's almost like training time or like, oh, these 607 00:30:21,974 --> 00:30:25,404 guys are the angels in training or something, 608 00:30:25,404 --> 00:30:29,514 and they have some questions for you as a living thing. 609 00:30:29,514 --> 00:30:31,854 And again, I don't know if they're angels, I don't 610 00:30:31,854 --> 00:30:34,604 know what they are, but they're always, it's always 611 00:30:34,604 --> 00:30:37,094 like a different group and they come and they ask 612 00:30:37,099 --> 00:30:41,354 me questions about what it's like to be alive. 613 00:30:41,624 --> 00:30:43,414 So like this, but the other way. 614 00:30:43,714 --> 00:30:44,104 Yeah. 615 00:30:44,104 --> 00:30:46,204 Speaking of questions, people are probably gonna 616 00:30:46,204 --> 00:30:48,874 wanna ask you questions after this interview. 617 00:30:49,274 --> 00:30:51,074 Do you mind people contacting you? 618 00:30:51,124 --> 00:30:53,914 So I don't do this as a thing, like I don't have a book or 619 00:30:53,914 --> 00:30:56,344 a website or anything, which makes it a little tough. 620 00:30:56,734 --> 00:30:59,884 I have my email address I can give to you. 621 00:30:59,934 --> 00:31:03,964 And if someone reaches out and really needs to talk to 622 00:31:03,964 --> 00:31:07,024 me or has some question, I'd be happy to talk to them. 623 00:31:07,534 --> 00:31:09,834 And if somebody's super keen, then I'll pass them on. 624 00:31:10,284 --> 00:31:10,614 Excellent. 625 00:31:11,094 --> 00:31:14,814 Also, I love the word keen and I wish we used it in 626 00:31:14,814 --> 00:31:16,914 the United States more, and I've been actively trying 627 00:31:16,914 --> 00:31:20,154 to push people to use it, so I just, it's like you. 628 00:31:20,169 --> 00:31:20,619 keen as 629 00:31:20,904 --> 00:31:22,504 Yeah great word. 630 00:31:23,304 --> 00:31:24,504 Yeah, I use it a lot. 631 00:31:24,584 --> 00:31:24,914 Okay. 632 00:31:24,964 --> 00:31:27,934 Any final message for people who might be 633 00:31:27,934 --> 00:31:28,804 watching this Julie? 634 00:31:29,039 --> 00:31:33,409 Just that this was what I experienced as far 635 00:31:33,409 --> 00:31:35,959 as what I could observe and feel and see. 636 00:31:36,349 --> 00:31:39,049 I don't know what's real and what's not, but it 637 00:31:39,049 --> 00:31:40,429 felt very real to me. 638 00:31:40,864 --> 00:31:43,904 And I don't know, maybe other people have different 639 00:31:43,904 --> 00:31:46,904 experiences, what you said based on your understanding, 640 00:31:46,904 --> 00:31:48,674 they show you what you need to see in order 641 00:31:48,679 --> 00:31:49,874 to process everything. 642 00:31:50,504 --> 00:31:53,564 Hopefully people that have similar brains that 643 00:31:53,569 --> 00:31:57,014 work like mine might be able to connect with this. 644 00:31:57,019 --> 00:31:59,954 But I don't think any of us all have all the answers, 645 00:31:59,954 --> 00:32:02,434 but I can definitely share what I experienced and 646 00:32:02,439 --> 00:32:05,479 hopefully that'll bring some comfort to somebody else. 647 00:32:05,529 --> 00:32:08,359 Julie, thank you so much for coming on the show. 648 00:32:08,689 --> 00:32:10,339 I've really enjoyed this conversation. 649 00:32:10,339 --> 00:32:11,899 It's made me think about some things that I 650 00:32:11,899 --> 00:32:14,439 hadn't realized before. 651 00:32:14,499 --> 00:32:16,869 So thank you for that and I appreciate your time. 652 00:32:17,379 --> 00:32:17,769 That's great. 653 00:32:17,769 --> 00:32:21,609 Thank you so much for being up very early and talking 654 00:32:21,609 --> 00:32:24,069 to me or very late, or however you wanna say it. 655 00:32:24,474 --> 00:32:25,014 Oh, you're welcome.