1 01:00:01,250 --> 01:00:02,000 Good morning. 2 01:00:03,958 --> 01:00:06,041 And welcome to morning cereal 3 01:00:12,625 --> 01:00:13,416 Okay, good morning. 4 01:00:13,708 --> 01:00:15,625 It's not a manic Monday or a Sunday. 5 01:00:15,833 --> 01:00:18,041 I know that's your fun day, but it's just 6 01:00:18,041 --> 01:00:20,041 a plain old fantastic Thursday. 7 01:00:20,958 --> 01:00:23,333 It's also National Draw Dinosaur Day, so 8 01:00:23,333 --> 01:00:24,708 that's an easy one to check off. 9 01:00:25,583 --> 01:00:27,666 And it's also, and you'll be excited for 10 01:00:27,666 --> 01:00:29,208 this one, it's yodel 11 01:00:29,208 --> 01:00:30,375 for your neighbor's day. 12 01:00:30,750 --> 01:00:31,541 You're welcome, neighbors. 13 01:00:32,208 --> 01:00:34,208 So just a plain old Thursday is shaping 14 01:00:34,208 --> 01:00:35,875 up to look really good right now. 15 01:00:36,416 --> 01:00:38,125 Okay, let's go ahead and just jump right 16 01:00:38,125 --> 01:00:39,000 into today's quotes. 17 01:00:39,500 --> 01:00:41,208 One fun nostalgic quote, and then a 18 01:00:41,208 --> 01:00:42,291 second quote to tease our 19 01:00:42,291 --> 01:00:43,791 book review later in the 20 01:00:43,791 --> 01:00:44,166 episode. 21 01:00:44,791 --> 01:00:46,375 Hopefully, one of these quotes will speak 22 01:00:46,375 --> 01:00:47,166 to you and kickstart 23 01:00:47,166 --> 01:00:48,125 your day in a positive 24 01:00:48,250 --> 01:00:48,666 direction. 25 01:00:49,541 --> 01:00:49,833 All right. 26 01:00:50,291 --> 01:00:51,875 The first quote is from Christian Bale, 27 01:00:52,125 --> 01:00:53,458 and he said, "But I 28 01:00:53,458 --> 01:00:54,708 learned that there's a certain 29 01:00:54,750 --> 01:00:56,375 character that can be built from 30 01:00:56,375 --> 01:00:57,916 embarrassing yourself endlessly. 31 01:00:58,791 --> 01:01:00,791 If you can sit happy with embarrassment, 32 01:01:01,250 --> 01:01:02,375 there's not much else 33 01:01:02,375 --> 01:01:03,875 that can really get to you." 34 01:01:04,083 --> 01:01:04,416 End quote. 35 01:01:05,291 --> 01:01:08,250 I absolutely love this quote because the 36 01:01:08,250 --> 01:01:09,458 feeling of embarrassment is 37 01:01:09,458 --> 01:01:10,708 one of the strongest negative 38 01:01:10,750 --> 01:01:12,791 feelings people can feel, and being 39 01:01:12,791 --> 01:01:15,041 comfortable in that has to be empowering. 40 01:01:16,208 --> 01:01:17,500 And today's teaser quote from the book 41 01:01:17,500 --> 01:01:21,208 review is, "Bores, that is all they are. 42 01:01:21,875 --> 01:01:24,708 Bores, intoxicated with their own egos, 43 01:01:25,208 --> 01:01:26,000 drunk with a sense of 44 01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:26,958 their own importance." 45 01:01:28,291 --> 01:01:30,333 And as usual, we'll unpack that here in 46 01:01:30,333 --> 01:01:31,416 just a few minutes during 47 01:01:31,416 --> 01:01:32,333 the book review segment. 48 01:01:33,083 --> 01:01:34,833 But first, let's jump into our usual dose 49 01:01:34,833 --> 01:01:35,791 of fun and historic 50 01:01:35,791 --> 01:01:36,958 facts from this day in 51 01:01:36,958 --> 01:01:37,291 history. 52 01:01:38,250 --> 01:01:39,333 Today's news facts and 53 01:01:39,333 --> 01:01:41,666 birthdays are for January 30th. 54 01:01:42,041 --> 01:01:45,041 In 1847, the city previously known as 55 01:01:45,041 --> 01:01:46,416 Yerba Buena, meaning 56 01:01:46,416 --> 01:01:48,333 "Good Herb," San Francisco 57 01:01:48,625 --> 01:01:49,833 was given its current name. 58 01:01:51,291 --> 01:01:52,500 Franklin D. Roosevelt was 59 01:01:52,500 --> 01:01:54,875 born on this date back in 1882. 60 01:01:56,333 --> 01:01:59,500 In 1933, Adolf Hitler was named 61 01:01:59,500 --> 01:02:01,583 Chancellor of Germany, marking the 62 01:02:01,583 --> 01:02:02,416 beginning of the Third 63 01:02:02,541 --> 01:02:02,750 Reich. 64 01:02:04,291 --> 01:02:07,750 In 1948, Indian leader Mahatma Gandhi 65 01:02:07,750 --> 01:02:09,291 considered the father of his 66 01:02:09,291 --> 01:02:10,375 country and internationally 67 01:02:10,500 --> 01:02:11,375 revered for his 68 01:02:11,375 --> 01:02:13,208 doctrine of nonviolent protest. 69 01:02:13,833 --> 01:02:15,791 He was assassinated on this date in the 70 01:02:15,791 --> 01:02:16,750 garden of the New Delhi 71 01:02:16,750 --> 01:02:17,791 home that he was visiting. 72 01:02:18,791 --> 01:02:22,208 In 1965, the world saw its largest ever 73 01:02:22,208 --> 01:02:23,500 state funeral at the 74 01:02:23,500 --> 01:02:25,208 time at St. Paul's Cathedral 75 01:02:25,541 --> 01:02:27,083 in London for Winston Churchill. 76 01:02:28,583 --> 01:02:30,541 In 1969, the Beatles 77 01:02:30,541 --> 01:02:32,500 performed their last live gig. 78 01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:34,416 It was a 42-minute concert 79 01:02:34,416 --> 01:02:36,000 on a roof in London, England. 80 01:02:37,208 --> 01:02:40,666 In 1977, the eighth and final part of the 81 01:02:40,666 --> 01:02:42,875 TV series Roots became 82 01:02:42,875 --> 01:02:44,583 the most watched U.S. 83 01:02:44,583 --> 01:02:46,250 entertainment show up until that time, 84 01:02:46,541 --> 01:02:47,708 not including sports or 85 01:02:47,708 --> 01:02:49,583 news, but with an estimated 86 01:02:49,666 --> 01:02:50,875 hundred million viewers. 87 01:02:52,250 --> 01:02:54,000 And in 1982, the first 88 01:02:54,000 --> 01:02:55,375 computer virus was released. 89 01:02:56,083 --> 01:02:57,875 It was named Elk Cloner, and it was 90 01:02:57,875 --> 01:02:58,541 created by a 91 01:02:58,541 --> 01:03:00,208 15-year-old as a practical joke. 92 01:03:00,583 --> 01:03:01,291 Those darn kids. 93 01:03:02,166 --> 01:03:05,333 Well, that kid, Richard Derinkta, he went 94 01:03:05,333 --> 01:03:06,125 on to graduate from 95 01:03:06,125 --> 01:03:07,125 Northwestern University, 96 01:03:07,750 --> 01:03:09,833 and he had several tech-slash-software 97 01:03:09,833 --> 01:03:11,125 companies, with one of 98 01:03:11,125 --> 01:03:13,166 them being acquired by IBM in 99 01:03:13,166 --> 01:03:13,708 2015. 100 01:03:14,916 --> 01:03:17,916 And lastly, in 1994, Dan Jansen, he 101 01:03:17,916 --> 01:03:19,541 skated a world record 500 102 01:03:19,541 --> 01:03:21,125 meters, becoming the first 103 01:03:21,208 --> 01:03:23,166 man to ever break 36 seconds 104 01:03:23,166 --> 01:03:26,166 in the event at 35.92 seconds. 105 01:03:26,583 --> 01:03:29,625 The current record is 33.61 seconds, 106 01:03:29,625 --> 01:03:30,666 which was set in 2019. 107 01:03:31,708 --> 01:03:32,458 And if today is your 108 01:03:32,458 --> 01:03:33,541 birthday, happy birthday. 109 01:03:33,833 --> 01:03:34,708 You share a birthday 110 01:03:34,708 --> 01:03:36,583 with actor Christian Bale. 111 01:03:37,083 --> 01:03:38,541 He's 51 years old today. 112 01:03:39,083 --> 01:03:40,000 Former vice president 113 01:03:40,000 --> 01:03:41,541 Dick Cheney, he's 84. 114 01:03:42,541 --> 01:03:45,250 Singer-songwriter Phil Collins, he's 73. 115 01:03:46,083 --> 01:03:48,458 And actor Gene Hackman, he's 95. 116 01:03:49,625 --> 01:03:51,291 And the number one song on this date in 117 01:03:51,291 --> 01:03:54,458 1991 was the first time by surface. 118 01:03:55,125 --> 01:03:57,416 This was an R&B slash pop 119 01:03:57,416 --> 01:03:59,375 music love song from the early 90s. 120 01:03:59,750 --> 01:04:01,041 And it takes me way back 121 01:04:01,041 --> 01:04:02,291 to junior high school love. 122 01:04:03,083 --> 01:04:04,125 But the song may not be 123 01:04:04,125 --> 01:04:05,416 well known to many listeners. 124 01:04:06,041 --> 01:04:08,250 The song only spent a week at number one, 125 01:04:08,583 --> 01:04:10,625 and was the group's only number one song. 126 01:04:11,833 --> 01:04:13,125 And if you follow the Morning Serial 127 01:04:13,125 --> 01:04:15,208 podcast on Instagram, you 128 01:04:15,208 --> 01:04:16,416 can hear an excerpt from 129 01:04:16,416 --> 01:04:19,000 this song, and you may just recall the 130 01:04:19,000 --> 01:04:20,375 familiarity of this song 131 01:04:20,375 --> 01:04:21,833 from way back in your mind. 132 01:04:22,541 --> 01:04:25,375 The chorus says, "The first time I looked 133 01:04:25,375 --> 01:04:27,208 into your eyes, I cried." 134 01:04:28,500 --> 01:04:30,416 Red flag, get your red flags. 135 01:04:31,375 --> 01:04:32,791 And the number one movie on this date in 136 01:04:32,791 --> 01:04:34,916 1996 was 12 Monkeys. 137 01:04:35,375 --> 01:04:37,416 This is another movie I haven't seen, but 138 01:04:37,416 --> 01:04:38,166 it's about traveling 139 01:04:38,166 --> 01:04:40,041 back in time from the 140 01:04:40,083 --> 01:04:43,916 2030s back to the 1990s to try and stop a 141 01:04:43,916 --> 01:04:45,541 plague that could wipe out humanity. 142 01:04:46,416 --> 01:04:47,958 And it stars Brad Pitt and Bruce Willis. 143 01:04:48,500 --> 01:04:50,250 In fact, Pitt's work earned him a Golden 144 01:04:50,250 --> 01:04:51,375 Globe win for the best 145 01:04:51,375 --> 01:04:52,750 supporting actor, and it 146 01:04:52,750 --> 01:04:54,166 was his first Oscar nomination. 147 01:04:55,166 --> 01:04:56,416 I may have to watch this one at some 148 01:04:56,416 --> 01:04:57,375 point just to see what 149 01:04:57,375 --> 01:04:58,916 the film thought the 2030s 150 01:04:58,916 --> 01:05:00,791 would look like, given we're just five 151 01:05:00,791 --> 01:05:01,708 years away from that. 152 01:05:02,041 --> 01:05:02,708 It's a crazy thought. 153 01:05:03,791 --> 01:05:05,541 Okay, that brings us to the book review 154 01:05:05,541 --> 01:05:06,458 and some personal 155 01:05:06,458 --> 01:05:07,750 growth segment of the Morning 156 01:05:07,750 --> 01:05:08,083 Serial. 157 01:05:08,708 --> 01:05:10,125 And this is where we take a few moments 158 01:05:10,125 --> 01:05:11,125 to reflect on lessons 159 01:05:11,125 --> 01:05:12,208 learned from the current 160 01:05:12,208 --> 01:05:12,958 book we're reading. 161 01:05:13,458 --> 01:05:14,708 Currently, we're reading through Dale 162 01:05:14,708 --> 01:05:15,833 Carnegie's How to Win 163 01:05:15,833 --> 01:05:17,125 Friends and Influence People. 164 01:05:17,625 --> 01:05:19,541 As you know, it's a timeless book that is 165 01:05:19,541 --> 01:05:20,541 consistently on all 166 01:05:20,541 --> 01:05:22,083 the must read lists, and 167 01:05:22,083 --> 01:05:24,041 it's packed with rock solid advice and 168 01:05:24,041 --> 01:05:26,250 actions for us all to use and to build 169 01:05:26,250 --> 01:05:27,125 healthy foundational 170 01:05:27,166 --> 01:05:28,333 concepts to live by. 171 01:05:29,208 --> 01:05:30,916 And yesterday, we were still reading 172 01:05:30,916 --> 01:05:32,291 through chapter four, part 173 01:05:32,291 --> 01:05:34,541 two, entitled An Easy Way 174 01:05:34,541 --> 01:05:36,375 to Become a Good Conversationalist. 175 01:05:37,083 --> 01:05:39,083 And Carnegie started this chapter out by 176 01:05:39,083 --> 01:05:39,916 telling a story about 177 01:05:39,916 --> 01:05:42,083 himself being labeled the most 178 01:05:42,166 --> 01:05:44,833 interesting conversationalist simply by 179 01:05:44,833 --> 01:05:46,875 being an active and interested listener. 180 01:05:47,583 --> 01:05:49,458 And he continued yesterday saying that 181 01:05:49,458 --> 01:05:50,708 not only can active 182 01:05:50,708 --> 01:05:52,041 listening make people feel 183 01:05:52,041 --> 01:05:55,125 important, but when used patiently and 184 01:05:55,125 --> 01:05:56,708 with sympathy, active 185 01:05:56,708 --> 01:05:57,791 listening can be a great 186 01:05:57,791 --> 01:06:00,291 tool to reduce the anger levels with 187 01:06:00,291 --> 01:06:01,250 someone that is upset. 188 01:06:02,125 --> 01:06:02,791 Carnegie tells a 189 01:06:02,791 --> 01:06:05,000 story about Julian Detmer. 190 01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:07,375 He's the owner of a growing company and 191 01:06:07,375 --> 01:06:08,666 how he handled an angry 192 01:06:08,666 --> 01:06:10,041 customer who stormed into 193 01:06:10,041 --> 01:06:10,583 his office. 194 01:06:11,500 --> 01:06:13,125 The backstory here is that the customer 195 01:06:13,125 --> 01:06:14,208 owed the company a small 196 01:06:14,208 --> 01:06:15,583 amount of money that the 197 01:06:15,583 --> 01:06:18,500 company was absolutely sure he owed and 198 01:06:18,500 --> 01:06:19,583 pursued collecting it. 199 01:06:20,041 --> 01:06:22,416 However, the customer was also sure that 200 01:06:22,416 --> 01:06:23,500 he did not owe the money. 201 01:06:24,041 --> 01:06:26,041 And after several letters asking him to 202 01:06:26,041 --> 01:06:27,708 pay, the customer went to 203 01:06:27,708 --> 01:06:29,125 Chicago to tell the owner 204 01:06:29,125 --> 01:06:31,583 in person that he wasn't paying and to 205 01:06:31,583 --> 01:06:33,250 really just give him a piece of his mind. 206 01:06:34,458 --> 01:06:36,250 Well, Detmer, the owner of the company, 207 01:06:36,500 --> 01:06:37,375 he said this about 208 01:06:37,375 --> 01:06:39,291 the encounter, quote, "I 209 01:06:39,625 --> 01:06:41,708 listened patiently to all he had to say. 210 01:06:42,291 --> 01:06:44,333 I was tempted to interrupt, but I 211 01:06:44,333 --> 01:06:46,500 realized that that would be bad policy. 212 01:06:47,125 --> 01:06:49,333 So I let him talk himself out." 213 01:06:49,625 --> 01:06:49,875 End quote. 214 01:06:50,625 --> 01:06:52,166 When the customer had finally set his 215 01:06:52,166 --> 01:06:53,416 peace and was in more of 216 01:06:53,416 --> 01:06:54,875 a receptive mood, Detmer 217 01:06:54,875 --> 01:06:56,291 thanked the customer for coming to 218 01:06:56,291 --> 01:06:57,875 Chicago and that he had 219 01:06:57,875 --> 01:06:59,333 done him a great favor telling 220 01:06:59,333 --> 01:07:01,166 him this story, that his credit 221 01:07:01,166 --> 01:07:02,541 department had annoyed him 222 01:07:02,541 --> 01:07:03,833 and that it concerned him 223 01:07:03,833 --> 01:07:05,041 that maybe they were annoying 224 01:07:05,041 --> 01:07:06,666 other good customers as well. 225 01:07:07,583 --> 01:07:09,125 Detmer told the customer that he 226 01:07:09,125 --> 01:07:10,625 understood exactly how he 227 01:07:10,625 --> 01:07:11,958 felt and that he would do the 228 01:07:11,958 --> 01:07:13,625 same thing if he were in his shoes. 229 01:07:14,166 --> 01:07:16,125 And he added that since the customer 230 01:07:16,125 --> 01:07:17,541 wasn't going to buy from them 231 01:07:17,541 --> 01:07:19,208 anymore, he even recommended 232 01:07:19,333 --> 01:07:20,583 some other woolen houses. 233 01:07:21,833 --> 01:07:23,500 Detmer said, quote, "That was the last 234 01:07:23,500 --> 01:07:25,500 thing in the world he expected me to say. 235 01:07:25,916 --> 01:07:27,958 I think he was a trifle disappointed." 236 01:07:28,250 --> 01:07:28,583 End quote. 237 01:07:29,208 --> 01:07:30,583 This customer had come all the way to 238 01:07:30,583 --> 01:07:31,750 Chicago to tell Detmer 239 01:07:31,750 --> 01:07:33,250 off, but instead of fighting 240 01:07:33,250 --> 01:07:34,875 with the owner, the owner told the 241 01:07:34,875 --> 01:07:35,833 customer he would clear 242 01:07:35,833 --> 01:07:37,333 the bill and forget about it 243 01:07:37,375 --> 01:07:39,416 because the customer was, quote, "a very 244 01:07:39,416 --> 01:07:41,750 careful man with only one account to look 245 01:07:41,750 --> 01:07:44,375 after while our clerks had to look after 246 01:07:44,375 --> 01:07:45,375 thousands of accounts." 247 01:07:46,583 --> 01:07:48,083 In the end, the customer went home and 248 01:07:48,083 --> 01:07:49,875 found that he had missed a bill indeed. 249 01:07:50,291 --> 01:07:51,791 He paid it and he remained a 250 01:07:51,791 --> 01:07:53,583 client for another 22 years. 251 01:07:54,541 --> 01:07:56,375 Carnegie follows that story with the tale 252 01:07:56,375 --> 01:07:58,166 of Edward Bach, who 253 01:07:58,166 --> 01:07:59,625 became a successful magazine 254 01:07:59,708 --> 01:08:01,333 editor using the same principles 255 01:08:01,333 --> 01:08:03,000 advocated for in this chapter. 256 01:08:03,708 --> 01:08:05,708 His story is long, but I'll summarize it. 257 01:08:06,250 --> 01:08:08,333 He grew up poor and he only had six years 258 01:08:08,333 --> 01:08:09,416 of schooling, so he 259 01:08:09,416 --> 01:08:10,458 bought an encyclopedia 260 01:08:11,416 --> 01:08:12,125 and he read about the 261 01:08:12,125 --> 01:08:13,625 lives of famous people. 262 01:08:14,625 --> 01:08:16,083 And then he did the unexpected. 263 01:08:16,375 --> 01:08:18,041 He wrote some of these famous people 264 01:08:18,041 --> 01:08:19,416 asking if the stories were 265 01:08:19,416 --> 01:08:21,041 true and for more information 266 01:08:21,041 --> 01:08:21,583 on them. 267 01:08:22,250 --> 01:08:24,166 Well, Edward began corresponding with 268 01:08:24,166 --> 01:08:25,208 these people and was 269 01:08:25,208 --> 01:08:26,916 often invited to visit them. 270 01:08:27,625 --> 01:08:29,416 Edward was a great listener and Carnegie 271 01:08:29,416 --> 01:08:30,541 makes the point that 272 01:08:30,541 --> 01:08:32,250 Edward's ability to meet these 273 01:08:32,291 --> 01:08:34,333 people and receive life-changing ambition 274 01:08:34,333 --> 01:08:35,500 that shaped his life 275 01:08:35,500 --> 01:08:38,000 was, quote, "made possible 276 01:08:38,000 --> 01:08:39,791 solely by the application of the 277 01:08:39,791 --> 01:08:40,541 principles we are 278 01:08:40,541 --> 01:08:41,875 discussing here," end quote. 279 01:08:42,333 --> 01:08:43,916 And he's talking about active listening, 280 01:08:44,541 --> 01:08:46,833 interested listening, exclusive attention 281 01:08:46,833 --> 01:08:49,250 to the speaker, patience and sympathy. 282 01:08:50,250 --> 01:08:52,041 Carnegie continues on saying many people 283 01:08:52,041 --> 01:08:53,291 fail to make a good 284 01:08:53,291 --> 01:08:54,750 first impression because they 285 01:08:54,750 --> 01:08:56,041 don't listen attentively. 286 01:08:57,041 --> 01:08:58,833 Quoting journalist Isaac Marcasson 287 01:08:58,833 --> 01:09:00,500 saying, quote, "they, 288 01:09:00,791 --> 01:09:03,250 people, have been so much concerned 289 01:09:03,250 --> 01:09:05,166 with what they are going to say next that 290 01:09:05,166 --> 01:09:06,083 they do not keep their 291 01:09:06,083 --> 01:09:07,458 ears open," end quote. 292 01:09:08,208 --> 01:09:10,583 Carnegie says that all people, famous 293 01:09:10,583 --> 01:09:11,750 people down to folks like 294 01:09:11,750 --> 01:09:13,625 you and me, we prefer and 295 01:09:13,625 --> 01:09:14,833 we even crave for 296 01:09:14,833 --> 01:09:16,125 someone who is a good listener. 297 01:09:17,208 --> 01:09:18,708 Somewhere along the way, I learned to ask 298 01:09:18,708 --> 01:09:20,000 my wife if this was a 299 01:09:20,000 --> 01:09:21,416 conversation she wanted 300 01:09:21,416 --> 01:09:24,166 me to respond to and give my two cents or 301 01:09:24,166 --> 01:09:25,958 if this was a conversation where she just 302 01:09:26,000 --> 01:09:27,541 wanted me to listen so she could vent. 303 01:09:28,541 --> 01:09:30,750 And Carnegie also suggests that often 304 01:09:30,750 --> 01:09:32,875 people just merely want a friendly 305 01:09:32,875 --> 01:09:34,041 sympathetic listener 306 01:09:34,500 --> 01:09:35,083 to whom they can 307 01:09:35,083 --> 01:09:36,666 unburden themselves with. 308 01:09:37,166 --> 01:09:39,041 And that's frequently all an irritated 309 01:09:39,041 --> 01:09:40,791 customer wants and the 310 01:09:40,791 --> 01:09:42,291 dissatisfied employee or the 311 01:09:42,291 --> 01:09:44,625 hurt friend, that's all they want too. 312 01:09:45,583 --> 01:09:48,083 The psychologist Sigmund Freud was known 313 01:09:48,083 --> 01:09:50,458 for his exceptional ability to listen and 314 01:09:50,458 --> 01:09:51,500 make people feel heard. 315 01:09:52,333 --> 01:09:54,125 And Carnegie makes the distinction that 316 01:09:54,125 --> 01:09:55,208 Freud wasn't thought of 317 01:09:55,208 --> 01:09:56,291 this way because he had 318 01:09:56,291 --> 01:09:59,416 some quote, "soul penetrating gaze" with 319 01:09:59,416 --> 01:10:00,916 his eyes, but it was 320 01:10:00,916 --> 01:10:02,083 said that quote, "his 321 01:10:02,166 --> 01:10:03,916 eyes were mild and genial. 322 01:10:04,250 --> 01:10:06,125 His voice was low and kind. 323 01:10:06,583 --> 01:10:08,916 His gestures were few, but the attention 324 01:10:08,916 --> 01:10:11,875 he gave was extraordinary," end quote. 325 01:10:12,916 --> 01:10:14,875 Carnegie closes out the chapter with some 326 01:10:14,875 --> 01:10:16,875 very good summaries to bring this chapter 327 01:10:16,875 --> 01:10:18,625 home in a crystal clear way. 328 01:10:19,125 --> 01:10:21,708 He says quote, "If you want to know how 329 01:10:21,708 --> 01:10:23,000 to make people shun you 330 01:10:23,000 --> 01:10:24,125 and laugh at you behind 331 01:10:24,125 --> 01:10:25,125 your back and even 332 01:10:25,125 --> 01:10:27,333 despise you, here's the recipe. 333 01:10:28,125 --> 01:10:29,625 Never listen to anyone for long. 334 01:10:30,500 --> 01:10:32,000 Talk incessantly about yourself. 335 01:10:32,541 --> 01:10:34,041 If you have an idea while the other 336 01:10:34,041 --> 01:10:34,875 person is talking, 337 01:10:35,166 --> 01:10:36,375 don't wait for him or her to 338 01:10:36,375 --> 01:10:36,708 finish. 339 01:10:37,166 --> 01:10:39,041 Bust right in and interrupt in the middle 340 01:10:39,041 --> 01:10:40,250 of a sentence," end quote. 341 01:10:41,125 --> 01:10:42,625 And we all know people like 342 01:10:42,625 --> 01:10:44,291 that and they are frustrating. 343 01:10:45,125 --> 01:10:45,541 Carnegie actually 344 01:10:45,541 --> 01:10:47,166 calls them quote, "bores." 345 01:10:47,708 --> 01:10:50,166 That is all they are, "bores, intoxicated 346 01:10:50,166 --> 01:10:51,750 with their own egos, 347 01:10:52,333 --> 01:10:53,125 drunk with a sense of 348 01:10:53,125 --> 01:10:54,791 their own importance," end quote. 349 01:10:56,250 --> 01:10:58,375 Carnegie's final summary is this, and he 350 01:10:58,375 --> 01:10:59,958 reminds us that people are more 351 01:10:59,958 --> 01:11:00,958 interested in themselves 352 01:11:01,375 --> 01:11:02,375 than they are in any 353 01:11:02,375 --> 01:11:03,375 other thing in this world. 354 01:11:03,958 --> 01:11:04,625 It's human nature. 355 01:11:05,166 --> 01:11:06,125 Here's his final summary. 356 01:11:06,625 --> 01:11:08,958 Quote, "So if you aspire to be a good 357 01:11:08,958 --> 01:11:10,875 conversationalist, be 358 01:11:10,875 --> 01:11:12,083 an attentive listener. 359 01:11:12,708 --> 01:11:14,791 To be interesting, be interested. 360 01:11:15,875 --> 01:11:17,333 Ask questions that the other 361 01:11:17,333 --> 01:11:18,958 person will enjoy answering. 362 01:11:19,750 --> 01:11:21,375 Encourage them to talk about themselves 363 01:11:21,375 --> 01:11:23,833 and their accomplishments," end quote. 364 01:11:24,666 --> 01:11:25,166 Here it is. 365 01:11:25,625 --> 01:11:26,416 Carnegie's principle number 366 01:11:26,416 --> 01:11:28,666 four is, "Be a good listener. 367 01:11:29,250 --> 01:11:30,625 Encourage others to 368 01:11:30,625 --> 01:11:31,541 talk about themselves." 369 01:11:32,375 --> 01:11:33,166 There you have it. 370 01:11:33,583 --> 01:11:35,416 We are well on our way through part two 371 01:11:35,416 --> 01:11:36,333 of How to Win Friends 372 01:11:36,333 --> 01:11:37,750 and Influence People, which 373 01:11:37,750 --> 01:11:38,958 is entitled "Six Ways 374 01:11:38,958 --> 01:11:40,250 to Make People Like You." 375 01:11:40,541 --> 01:11:41,666 And we've now learned 376 01:11:41,666 --> 01:11:43,708 Carnegie's first four principles. 377 01:11:44,708 --> 01:11:46,333 So number one, become genuinely 378 01:11:46,333 --> 01:11:47,708 interested in other people. 379 01:11:48,166 --> 01:11:49,166 Number two, smile. 380 01:11:49,791 --> 01:11:51,916 Number three, remember that a person's 381 01:11:51,916 --> 01:11:53,541 name is to that person the 382 01:11:53,541 --> 01:11:54,833 sweetest and most important 383 01:11:54,875 --> 01:11:56,166 sound in any language. 384 01:11:56,750 --> 01:11:57,333 And today's number 385 01:11:57,333 --> 01:11:59,125 four, be a good listener. 386 01:11:59,458 --> 01:12:00,458 Encourage others to 387 01:12:00,458 --> 01:12:01,583 talk about themselves. 388 01:12:03,000 --> 01:12:04,500 Okay, nicely done. 389 01:12:05,125 --> 01:12:06,750 Go out and enjoy this day. 390 01:12:07,125 --> 01:12:08,166 Make the most of it. 391 01:12:08,750 --> 01:12:10,416 Yodel to your neighbors and then be a 392 01:12:10,416 --> 01:12:12,041 good listener as they yodel back. 393 01:12:12,791 --> 01:12:14,125 Today is a tough day ahead. 394 01:12:14,375 --> 01:12:15,000 Just keep swimming. 395 01:12:15,416 --> 01:12:16,000 You can do it. 396 01:12:16,833 --> 01:12:18,333 Join us again tomorrow as we start 397 01:12:18,333 --> 01:12:19,375 chapter five of part 398 01:12:19,375 --> 01:12:21,125 two, which is entitled, "How 399 01:12:21,125 --> 01:12:22,166 to Interest People." 400 01:12:23,041 --> 01:12:23,625 We'll see you again 401 01:12:23,625 --> 01:12:25,416 tomorrow and have a fantastic day. 402 01:12:27,500 --> 01:12:29,250 Don't forget to follow and subscribe to 403 01:12:29,250 --> 01:12:29,875 the Morning Serial 404 01:12:29,875 --> 01:12:31,500 podcast on the One Life 405 01:12:31,666 --> 01:12:32,500 Live It channel. 406 01:12:33,041 --> 01:12:34,958 You can find more episodes and videos by 407 01:12:34,958 --> 01:12:36,625 visiting our YouTube channel and the 408 01:12:36,625 --> 01:12:38,250 website at seaningless 409 01:12:38,583 --> 01:12:40,750 and at seaningless.com, where you can 410 01:12:40,750 --> 01:12:42,083 also follow our other 411 01:12:42,083 --> 01:12:43,625 podcast, the Mr. and Mrs. 412 01:12:43,625 --> 01:12:44,791 Inglis podcast and the 413 01:12:44,791 --> 01:12:45,791 Life Happens podcast. 414 01:12:46,625 --> 01:12:48,291 In these other podcasts, we'll dive 415 01:12:48,291 --> 01:12:49,666 deeper into everyday issues, 416 01:12:49,958 --> 01:12:50,708 self-improvement and 417 01:12:50,708 --> 01:12:53,208 well-being, business and finance, and we 418 01:12:53,208 --> 01:12:54,458 welcome special guests too. 419 01:12:54,958 --> 01:12:55,708 So join us. 420 01:12:55,708 --> 01:12:57,041 It'll be a good time, I promise. 421 01:12:57,750 --> 01:12:58,625 Thanks again for listening. 422 01:12:58,833 --> 01:13:00,375 Have a fantastic day and 423 01:13:00,375 --> 01:13:01,000 we'll see you tomorrow.