Are you showing up for yourself? Many of us, especially men, are so focused on providing and showing up for others that we do not know how to reflect and take care of our own needs. In this episode of the Never in Reverse Podcast, cohosts Jeremy Axel and Doug Cox explore their own difficulties with self-care and how they are working to overcome them.
As providers, men are taught that their role is to support other people. Jeremy and Doug are hard workers, but this work ethic can sometimes leave them without any energy to show up for themselves and their loved ones. Jeremy and Doug’s families noticed their difficulty in this area and pointed it out to them, and both of them are working to improve.
Learn why putting yourself first will help you show up authentically at work and at home, and find the tools you need to practice self-care and self-reflection. You can’t provide for others if you aren’t providing for yourself.
For detailed show notes, navigate using the time stamps below:
[4:47] Men are typically taught to provide and put work first in our society. This often leaves us lacking in our personal lives. Doug believes that this mentality is a combination of instinct and societal expectations.
[7:03] Jeremy describes this as “the provider side.” He is learning that failure is a part of life, and accepting it allows us to build space for a life that we truly want.
[10:01] The desire to improve and win motivates Jeremy and Doug to work persistently toward success. Jeremy’s family has a running joke – “two more deals” – based off of Jeremy’s once constant focus on work. He has since learned to have a better work-life balance and show up for his family.
[15:00] Doug is going on vacation for the first time a long time. His wife told him that he has not taken time for himself. The vacation is a way for him to disconnect from work and show up for himself.
[18:34] Jeremy is taking his kids to the mountains to spend quality time with them. He thinks that taking space from the constant flow of emails will help him show up more authentically at home and when he comes back to work.
[22:39] Taking care of yourself has to come first. Jeremy and Doug struggle with putting themselves first and are learning how to better show up for themselves. Self-reflection is helping them make sure their needs are met.
[24:54] Doug gets a lot of his fulfillment from others. This can be an obstacle to him making sure his own needs are met.
[27:31] Doug also recognizes that he is a people pleaser, especially following a conversation with his father who pointed out this tendency. Jeremy says that it is not possible to realistically please everyone. He says that while he does not want to “reverse,” there has to be room to “slow down” and “brake.”
FOLLOW US: