WEBVTT 210 00:24:53.755 --> 00:24:55.805 Alright, we are continuing in a series right now 211 00:24:55.805 --> 00:24:57.525 that we've been calling Family of Families. 212 00:24:58.755 --> 00:25:00.885 This week we were specifically going 213 00:25:00.885 --> 00:25:03.365 to be talking about the roles of men 214 00:25:03.365 --> 00:25:05.125 and women in the context of family 215 00:25:05.225 --> 00:25:06.285 and the family of families. 216 00:25:06.285 --> 00:25:07.845 And as I started digging into this thing, 217 00:25:08.485 --> 00:25:09.805 I started looking at, man, what's going 218 00:25:09.805 --> 00:25:10.885 on in our culture right now? 219 00:25:10.905 --> 00:25:12.885 And you've got this, uh, call 220 00:25:13.025 --> 00:25:15.485 and this that saying, Hey, masculinity is toxic. 221 00:25:15.905 --> 00:25:17.405 Uh, but you've also got people saying, 222 00:25:17.405 --> 00:25:19.365 but no, no, no, men need to step up and lead. 223 00:25:19.385 --> 00:25:21.245 So what does that look like? How do those balance out? 224 00:25:21.245 --> 00:25:23.565 And then with women, you've gotta know, we need women 225 00:25:23.665 --> 00:25:26.445 to be strong and, and they need to be women of dignity 226 00:25:26.585 --> 00:25:28.365 and they need to be caretakers of their home. 227 00:25:28.425 --> 00:25:30.845 But then we've got women in our homes 228 00:25:31.185 --> 00:25:32.685 and in our church community, they're just 229 00:25:33.445 --> 00:25:35.005 honestly just asking, am I enough? 230 00:25:35.825 --> 00:25:37.005 Can I get all this done? 231 00:25:37.025 --> 00:25:39.885 And then how does that play in the life of if I'm a, 232 00:25:40.005 --> 00:25:41.965 a man who's single or if I'm a woman who's single? 233 00:25:41.985 --> 00:25:45.125 And what I realized was, um, we're gonna have a two 234 00:25:45.125 --> 00:25:46.485 to three hour message this weekend, 235 00:25:47.225 --> 00:25:49.085 or we're actually gonna step back 236 00:25:49.085 --> 00:25:50.645 and say, no, no, we need to peel that back. 237 00:25:50.655 --> 00:25:52.325 Let's shelf that. That's probably a sermon 238 00:25:52.325 --> 00:25:53.525 series in and of itself. 239 00:25:54.065 --> 00:25:56.125 We got one week, we got 30 minutes. 240 00:25:56.185 --> 00:25:58.245 And so what's the most important thing 241 00:25:58.245 --> 00:25:59.965 that we can talk about as it relates 242 00:25:59.985 --> 00:26:01.445 to our identity as men and women? 243 00:26:02.025 --> 00:26:05.005 And what we landed on was our own relationship 244 00:26:05.005 --> 00:26:08.805 with Jesus Christ in a call to a life of personal holiness, 245 00:26:08.805 --> 00:26:11.925 whether we're men, women, married, single. 246 00:26:12.785 --> 00:26:15.125 And so as we leaned into that as a pastoral team, 247 00:26:15.125 --> 00:26:16.885 we thought, man, maybe it would be better for you 248 00:26:16.885 --> 00:26:19.485 to hear from somebody that's got a little bit more gray in 249 00:26:19.485 --> 00:26:20.925 their hair than I do in my beard. 250 00:26:21.305 --> 00:26:23.925 And so, uh, who we've got lined up is our pastor 251 00:26:23.985 --> 00:26:26.085 and director of spiritual formation here 252 00:26:26.105 --> 00:26:27.205 at Hope Community Church. 253 00:26:27.205 --> 00:26:30.725 Would you give a warm hope? Welcome to Pastor Clay Burgess. 254 00:26:37.955 --> 00:26:39.165 Alright, thanks Jason. 255 00:26:39.445 --> 00:26:41.565 I really, really appreciate that introduction. 256 00:26:41.565 --> 00:26:43.405 And also, uh, as he mentioned, 257 00:26:43.405 --> 00:26:45.565 we're continuing this series, family of Families. 258 00:26:45.725 --> 00:26:47.125 I hope that you have found it helpful. 259 00:26:47.625 --> 00:26:48.805 Uh, my wife, Stephanie 260 00:26:48.825 --> 00:26:51.925 and I, we have found some good, helpful reminders even 261 00:26:51.945 --> 00:26:55.405 for us as people with at least one of us with gray hair. 262 00:26:55.505 --> 00:26:56.565 But here we are. 263 00:26:56.985 --> 00:26:59.805 Uh, I, I just, let me add, or can we all agree? 264 00:27:00.185 --> 00:27:05.085 Can we all come to the agreement that families, well, 265 00:27:05.085 --> 00:27:06.565 they're, it's just not perfect. 266 00:27:07.115 --> 00:27:10.245 They're not perfect. And in the middle of all of that, 267 00:27:10.375 --> 00:27:13.445 there are often lots of spiritual opportunities, 268 00:27:13.995 --> 00:27:15.165 lots of spiritual opportunities. 269 00:27:15.225 --> 00:27:17.165 And my guess is that these opportunities continue 270 00:27:17.165 --> 00:27:19.965 to bubble up and they pop out due to proximity. 271 00:27:20.385 --> 00:27:22.205 We are so close to each other day in 272 00:27:22.205 --> 00:27:25.765 and day out that we see each other's, uh, flaws. 273 00:27:26.185 --> 00:27:28.965 We see each other at our worst times. 274 00:27:29.105 --> 00:27:31.725 So in the middle of that, we need constant reminders. 275 00:27:31.725 --> 00:27:33.005 We need constant training. 276 00:27:33.305 --> 00:27:35.645 We need constant help so that we can keep growing 277 00:27:35.705 --> 00:27:38.165 and moving in a positive direction. 278 00:27:38.625 --> 00:27:40.765 But let me ask you, this is a question that my wife 279 00:27:40.765 --> 00:27:43.245 and I would ask each other regularly when we were dating 280 00:27:43.305 --> 00:27:44.645 and then early on in our marriage. 281 00:27:45.025 --> 00:27:47.685 But we had asked each other, tell me, what are your hopes, 282 00:27:47.685 --> 00:27:49.325 dreams, goals and desires? 283 00:27:49.555 --> 00:27:51.725 What are your hopes, dreams, goals and desires? 284 00:27:52.865 --> 00:27:54.125 And what we were getting at is 285 00:27:54.125 --> 00:27:56.325 what would you like your life to look like? 286 00:27:57.225 --> 00:28:00.845 And so let me ask you, if it were up to you, if it were up 287 00:28:00.845 --> 00:28:02.445 to you and it was in your power, 288 00:28:02.635 --> 00:28:04.485 what would you want your life to look like? 289 00:28:06.255 --> 00:28:07.485 Maybe ask it this way. 290 00:28:07.555 --> 00:28:09.405 What would you want your family to look like? 291 00:28:09.415 --> 00:28:12.565 Could you imagine, could you imagine if there was a fantasy 292 00:28:12.745 --> 00:28:13.885 family draft? 293 00:28:14.715 --> 00:28:16.805 Like you could look up and say, here are the options. 294 00:28:16.865 --> 00:28:19.885 And you know, with my first pick I'm taking, you know, 295 00:28:19.965 --> 00:28:21.925 I mean, I get it, it could be a little bit awkward, 296 00:28:22.045 --> 00:28:25.325 a little tricky this morning if you are sitting next 297 00:28:25.325 --> 00:28:28.325 to someone that's part of your people. 298 00:28:29.465 --> 00:28:31.885 But think about it. Think about your desires. 299 00:28:32.105 --> 00:28:34.885 See, culture starts early on this with us. 300 00:28:35.355 --> 00:28:37.485 They're pressuring us even when we're young. 301 00:28:37.555 --> 00:28:39.125 What do you want to be when you grow up? 302 00:28:39.485 --> 00:28:41.805 I mean, think about the pressure that puts on a 4-year-old. 303 00:28:41.885 --> 00:28:43.165 I mean, I don't know what that should be, 304 00:28:43.505 --> 00:28:46.245 but I'm told that my answers were typical for a boy of my, 305 00:28:46.265 --> 00:28:48.845 you know, as I was coming along during my time, you want 306 00:28:48.845 --> 00:28:50.085 to be a fireman, a policeman, 307 00:28:50.085 --> 00:28:51.605 an army man or a baseball player. 308 00:28:52.385 --> 00:28:53.565 And then we get older 309 00:28:54.385 --> 00:28:57.845 but desires, the desires and aspirations. 310 00:28:57.875 --> 00:29:00.245 They don't go away. But what I want us to point out 311 00:29:00.245 --> 00:29:03.005 and notice is that they're still our desires. 312 00:29:03.635 --> 00:29:06.805 They're still our desires. They're the things that we want. 313 00:29:07.385 --> 00:29:10.085 And somewhere in our head, we have this thought, 314 00:29:10.545 --> 00:29:11.605 we have this thought 315 00:29:12.355 --> 00:29:16.165 that perhaps if these desires would become a reality, 316 00:29:16.555 --> 00:29:19.045 that some way, somehow they would give us some level 317 00:29:19.065 --> 00:29:20.125 of satisfaction. 318 00:29:20.225 --> 00:29:22.725 In other words, if I get this, then I'll be happy. 319 00:29:23.625 --> 00:29:25.045 If I get this, then I'll be happy. 320 00:29:25.105 --> 00:29:26.965 So think about some of those things that if you were 321 00:29:26.965 --> 00:29:28.965 to put on your list that you think would bring you 322 00:29:29.405 --> 00:29:30.405 satisfaction, and this would 323 00:29:30.405 --> 00:29:31.445 be something that you would want. 324 00:29:31.445 --> 00:29:34.245 This is part of your hopes, dreams, goals, and desires list. 325 00:29:34.425 --> 00:29:36.925 And for many of us, we would say, I want a loving spouse. 326 00:29:37.245 --> 00:29:38.525 I mean, you would, nobody would put, 327 00:29:38.525 --> 00:29:39.765 you know, I'm hoping for a jerk. 328 00:29:40.225 --> 00:29:42.685 I'm on the lookout for that. No, we want a loving spouse. 329 00:29:42.905 --> 00:29:46.365 We would like obedient kids or maybe healthy kids. 330 00:29:47.625 --> 00:29:48.805 We would like a good job. 331 00:29:49.385 --> 00:29:52.725 That's comes with meaningful work. 332 00:29:52.785 --> 00:29:54.125 We don't want it just to be a job 333 00:29:54.125 --> 00:29:55.565 where we feel like we're grinding it through. 334 00:29:55.565 --> 00:29:57.445 We want to know that it matters for something. 335 00:29:58.425 --> 00:30:00.685 And maybe it's, we get on down the list, we're thinking, 336 00:30:00.685 --> 00:30:02.125 you know, I'd love to have a house at the beach. 337 00:30:02.185 --> 00:30:03.565 I'd love to have a house at the mountains. 338 00:30:03.785 --> 00:30:05.525 I'd love to have a car that's reliable, 339 00:30:05.795 --> 00:30:08.405 that has less than four trouble lights on at any given time. 340 00:30:09.065 --> 00:30:12.205 Or maybe for you it's the car, maybe it's red and it's fast. 341 00:30:13.055 --> 00:30:14.445 Hopes, dreams and goals and desires. 342 00:30:14.445 --> 00:30:15.765 And I'm not saying none of this is bad. 343 00:30:15.825 --> 00:30:17.645 I'm not saying any of this is bad, 344 00:30:17.985 --> 00:30:19.845 but what I want us to look at is 345 00:30:20.555 --> 00:30:22.165 what if there's a bigger question? 346 00:30:23.235 --> 00:30:25.365 What if there is a deeper question 347 00:30:26.035 --> 00:30:27.605 that we could be wrestling with? 348 00:30:28.635 --> 00:30:30.485 What if the question we looked at was this? 349 00:30:30.595 --> 00:30:33.285 What does God want for me? 350 00:30:33.725 --> 00:30:36.245 I think that is a terribly interesting question, 351 00:30:37.095 --> 00:30:39.205 especially if God is all knowing. 352 00:30:39.505 --> 00:30:41.925 If he's all powerful and he's all present. 353 00:30:42.265 --> 00:30:43.685 It would be interesting to know, well, 354 00:30:43.685 --> 00:30:45.805 what would someone like that want for me? 355 00:30:46.065 --> 00:30:48.765 And maybe you walked in today, maybe you walked in today 356 00:30:48.765 --> 00:30:50.205 and you're not fully convinced of God 357 00:30:50.205 --> 00:30:52.045 and you're really, I don't know about church 358 00:30:52.045 --> 00:30:53.125 stuff or church people. 359 00:30:53.425 --> 00:30:56.405 And maybe, maybe just, maybe the only reason you're here is 360 00:30:56.405 --> 00:30:57.605 because someone invited you 361 00:30:57.745 --> 00:31:00.885 and they drug you here under the promise, under the promise 362 00:31:01.355 --> 00:31:03.765 that they would get some food for you afterwards. 363 00:31:04.945 --> 00:31:08.045 So however you got here today, I think 364 00:31:08.075 --> 00:31:10.565 that at least knowing the answer to the question, 365 00:31:10.795 --> 00:31:15.565 what would God want for me would be fascinating to know. 366 00:31:16.265 --> 00:31:18.925 And I'm not that we would even do anything about it. 367 00:31:20.385 --> 00:31:22.125 Not that we would do anything about it, 368 00:31:22.425 --> 00:31:24.645 but at least maybe you're thinking, 369 00:31:25.165 --> 00:31:26.725 I am interested in knowing. 370 00:31:27.625 --> 00:31:30.845 I'm interested in knowing what he would want from me. 371 00:31:30.985 --> 00:31:32.245 If it were possible to know 372 00:31:32.405 --> 00:31:35.205 what he would want from me, I would just like to know. 373 00:31:36.005 --> 00:31:37.605 I would like to know. So if you have your Bible 374 00:31:37.625 --> 00:31:39.725 or your electronic device, go ahead and grab that 375 00:31:39.945 --> 00:31:42.325 and meet me in First Thessalonians chapter four. 376 00:31:42.325 --> 00:31:44.165 We'll get some of the verses on the screen for you. 377 00:31:44.345 --> 00:31:45.845 And while you're getting there, just 378 00:31:45.845 --> 00:31:47.205 to let you know a little bit about this, 379 00:31:47.205 --> 00:31:50.765 this is a letter written by Paul to a church 380 00:31:50.805 --> 00:31:53.085 that has been recently planted about 381 00:31:53.085 --> 00:31:54.165 the middle of the first century. 382 00:31:54.305 --> 00:31:55.605 So he's writing to them. 383 00:31:55.865 --> 00:31:57.125 And as we pick up the letter, 384 00:31:57.355 --> 00:32:01.365 Paul has moved from reminding them to exhorting them. 385 00:32:01.865 --> 00:32:03.085 And you know this to be clear, 386 00:32:03.165 --> 00:32:04.605 a friend asks me, what is exhorting? 387 00:32:04.605 --> 00:32:05.845 Is that something that I want? 388 00:32:06.905 --> 00:32:08.765 Do you want, are you, are you exhorting me? 389 00:32:09.265 --> 00:32:13.245 So the idea of exhorting just to be, it is to advise, it's 390 00:32:13.245 --> 00:32:15.765 to advise or to caution earnestly, 391 00:32:16.385 --> 00:32:18.805 but there's some level of, of, of urgency 392 00:32:18.805 --> 00:32:19.885 that bubbles under this. 393 00:32:20.185 --> 00:32:22.405 So notice that all of that, that's what's going on. 394 00:32:22.405 --> 00:32:23.685 So he's reminded them of 395 00:32:23.685 --> 00:32:25.445 how Jesus has been at work in their life 396 00:32:25.585 --> 00:32:28.965 and now he's turning to encourage them how 397 00:32:28.965 --> 00:32:31.085 to live out in response to who Christ is 398 00:32:31.185 --> 00:32:32.205 and what he's done for them. 399 00:32:32.745 --> 00:32:36.005 That's what's next. So let me read the passage for us today. 400 00:32:37.095 --> 00:32:39.365 We're in First Thessalonians chapter four, 401 00:32:39.365 --> 00:32:40.445 beginning with verse one. 402 00:32:41.195 --> 00:32:44.635 Finally then brothers, we ask 403 00:32:45.415 --> 00:32:49.875 and urge you in the Lord Jesus that you, that 404 00:32:50.055 --> 00:32:53.075 as you receive from us how you ought to walk 405 00:32:53.215 --> 00:32:54.315 and to please God. 406 00:32:54.545 --> 00:32:57.995 Just as you are doing that, you doing so more 407 00:32:57.995 --> 00:33:02.165 and more for you know what instructions we gave you 408 00:33:02.165 --> 00:33:03.325 through the Lord Jesus. 409 00:33:03.795 --> 00:33:07.365 This is the will of God, your sanctification, 410 00:33:08.545 --> 00:33:11.315 that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each 411 00:33:11.315 --> 00:33:13.955 of you know how to control his own body and holiness 412 00:33:13.955 --> 00:33:17.635 and honor not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles 413 00:33:17.935 --> 00:33:22.075 who do not know God, that no one transgress 414 00:33:22.775 --> 00:33:25.355 and wrong his brother in this matter 415 00:33:25.355 --> 00:33:27.395 because the Lord is an avenger. 416 00:33:27.935 --> 00:33:31.395 And in all these things, and we told you beforehand 417 00:33:31.535 --> 00:33:36.275 and solemnly warned you, for the, for God has not called us 418 00:33:36.335 --> 00:33:38.875 to impurity, but in holiness. 419 00:33:39.505 --> 00:33:43.955 Therefore, whoever disregards this disregards, not man, 420 00:33:44.815 --> 00:33:47.675 but God who gives his holy 421 00:33:47.735 --> 00:33:49.915 Spirit to you. 422 00:33:51.455 --> 00:33:52.955 So as Paul opens this 423 00:33:53.015 --> 00:33:56.155 and he comes in, uh, in verse one, 424 00:33:56.575 --> 00:34:01.515 we see these words finally then, and don't be deceived. 425 00:34:01.515 --> 00:34:03.395 This is a pastor thing when they say, 426 00:34:03.415 --> 00:34:04.795 and in conclusion you just 427 00:34:04.795 --> 00:34:06.075 understand that doesn't mean anything. 428 00:34:06.385 --> 00:34:08.435 He's just finished three chapters. He's got two more to go. 429 00:34:08.435 --> 00:34:09.955 So he is not coming to the end yet. 430 00:34:10.455 --> 00:34:12.235 But the idea here is that finally 431 00:34:12.455 --> 00:34:13.515 or beyond that, 432 00:34:13.575 --> 00:34:16.395 beyond everything I've said in the first three chapters, 433 00:34:16.705 --> 00:34:17.715 this is where we're going. 434 00:34:17.735 --> 00:34:18.795 In the first three chapters, 435 00:34:18.795 --> 00:34:20.635 he's been looking back into the visit he made 436 00:34:20.855 --> 00:34:22.035 and the events that followed 437 00:34:22.135 --> 00:34:24.555 and the issues that he had with some of his critics. 438 00:34:24.735 --> 00:34:26.075 And now he's looking to the present 439 00:34:26.135 --> 00:34:29.835 and even peeking ahead to the future and offers some help. 440 00:34:30.815 --> 00:34:34.715 He gives some practical instruction to help them complete 441 00:34:34.715 --> 00:34:35.955 what is lacking in their faith. 442 00:34:35.955 --> 00:34:37.635 Those, that's language he used back in 443 00:34:37.635 --> 00:34:38.715 chapter three, verse 10. 444 00:34:39.855 --> 00:34:42.035 And it looks like he's asking this in a very humble, 445 00:34:42.105 --> 00:34:43.155 very gentle way. 446 00:34:43.615 --> 00:34:48.265 We ask and urge, urge means to come alongside of, 447 00:34:48.605 --> 00:34:50.345 to encourage, or this is showing 448 00:34:50.545 --> 00:34:52.625 that Paul has a desire to be helpful. 449 00:34:53.005 --> 00:34:55.025 He wants to help them. He doesn't want them 450 00:34:55.025 --> 00:34:56.505 to grow stagnant in their faith. 451 00:34:56.525 --> 00:34:58.505 He doesn't want them to get stale in their faith 452 00:34:59.005 --> 00:35:00.505 or in their spiritual journey. 453 00:35:00.965 --> 00:35:03.545 He wants them to have a vibrant faith, a growing faith, 454 00:35:03.985 --> 00:35:05.265 a faith that makes a difference. 455 00:35:06.005 --> 00:35:09.225 And he calls for this to be in the in, in the Lord Jesus. 456 00:35:09.335 --> 00:35:11.345 This is the source of the authority, the source 457 00:35:11.565 --> 00:35:12.625 of the life that they have. 458 00:35:12.625 --> 00:35:15.385 And he said, you receive this from us how you ought to walk. 459 00:35:15.445 --> 00:35:17.705 And he's talking here. Walk doesn't mean like just 460 00:35:17.705 --> 00:35:19.345 physically walking, but this is 461 00:35:19.345 --> 00:35:20.905 how you live your live it out. 462 00:35:21.175 --> 00:35:23.225 This is your actions, this is your decisions, 463 00:35:23.225 --> 00:35:26.345 this is your conduct that you would please God. 464 00:35:26.685 --> 00:35:27.905 And then he encourages him. 465 00:35:27.925 --> 00:35:29.425 He said, just as you were doing, 466 00:35:30.135 --> 00:35:31.585 keep on doing it more and more. 467 00:35:31.585 --> 00:35:33.665 He's like, just keep it up, keep it up, keep it up. 468 00:35:33.885 --> 00:35:35.865 You're doing good. Stay after it. 469 00:35:36.255 --> 00:35:38.925 Advance in this in what you were doing. 470 00:35:39.705 --> 00:35:41.805 And then in chapter two, he gets a little more firm 471 00:35:41.865 --> 00:35:44.925 and he says, this is a more for forceful word When he says, 472 00:35:45.265 --> 00:35:47.165 you know what instructions you, 473 00:35:47.505 --> 00:35:49.045 we gave you through the Lord Jesus. 474 00:35:49.505 --> 00:35:51.485 And now he's orienting toward this target. 475 00:35:51.785 --> 00:35:54.205 He brings his target, he's zeroes in on it 476 00:35:54.745 --> 00:35:56.685 at the first part of verse three. 477 00:35:57.705 --> 00:36:00.365 And he says, this is the will of God. 478 00:36:00.905 --> 00:36:03.125 Now that's a question that we often wanna know. Why? 479 00:36:03.125 --> 00:36:04.445 You wonder what the will of God is? 480 00:36:04.515 --> 00:36:07.485 Well, we're about to get part of it right here for the will 481 00:36:07.485 --> 00:36:09.805 of God is your sanctification. 482 00:36:11.245 --> 00:36:14.095 This is what God wants. This is what God desires. 483 00:36:14.175 --> 00:36:15.855 This is not just an information dump, 484 00:36:15.995 --> 00:36:17.415 but the His desire for you is 485 00:36:17.415 --> 00:36:20.255 that you would be sanctified your sanctification. 486 00:36:20.275 --> 00:36:22.335 And again, this shouldn't intimidate us. 487 00:36:22.335 --> 00:36:24.935 This is a theological word, this is a theological concept. 488 00:36:25.635 --> 00:36:27.815 And it's the process of being separated 489 00:36:27.955 --> 00:36:31.615 and set apart from sin and set towards God 490 00:36:33.265 --> 00:36:34.485 and God's holiness. 491 00:36:34.815 --> 00:36:36.405 Think about it this way. This is what it, 492 00:36:36.405 --> 00:36:38.285 this is like becoming like Jesus. 493 00:36:38.615 --> 00:36:40.285 Think of how Jesus lived his life. 494 00:36:40.305 --> 00:36:42.445 He was selfless, he was sacrificial, 495 00:36:42.625 --> 00:36:44.485 he was patient and he was kind. 496 00:36:44.545 --> 00:36:48.765 And when we begin to display those qualities, that is us 497 00:36:49.365 --> 00:36:52.085 becoming more and more like Christ. 498 00:36:52.195 --> 00:36:53.965 That is us being sanctified. 499 00:36:54.425 --> 00:36:55.725 And here's why this is a good thing, 500 00:36:55.725 --> 00:36:57.045 because a good question for you to ask, 501 00:36:57.045 --> 00:36:58.285 well is this even a good thing? 502 00:36:59.475 --> 00:37:02.085 What, what I mean what goes wrong if I'm not sanctified, 503 00:37:02.105 --> 00:37:03.245 if I don't go after that? 504 00:37:03.505 --> 00:37:05.325 If we miss going after sanctification, 505 00:37:05.385 --> 00:37:08.165 we end up giving our thing our lives to things 506 00:37:08.165 --> 00:37:11.605 that ultimately will result in shame and regret. 507 00:37:12.195 --> 00:37:13.885 When we feel like we, 508 00:37:13.905 --> 00:37:15.325 we can feel like we're devoting 509 00:37:15.325 --> 00:37:16.605 ourselves to the things of God. 510 00:37:16.625 --> 00:37:18.885 It can feel like that there is a restriction going on, 511 00:37:18.995 --> 00:37:21.445 that we are missing out on something, that we are limited 512 00:37:22.185 --> 00:37:23.525 by God, but the things 513 00:37:23.525 --> 00:37:25.805 of God are not restrictive in reality. 514 00:37:27.025 --> 00:37:30.325 The things of God protect us and actually free us. 515 00:37:32.115 --> 00:37:33.965 Come on. This is what a good parent does. 516 00:37:34.115 --> 00:37:36.205 This is why a parent would say, Hey, 517 00:37:36.505 --> 00:37:37.605 you know, don't eat the dirt. 518 00:37:37.715 --> 00:37:39.805 This is why a parent would say, quit licking doorknobs. 519 00:37:39.805 --> 00:37:42.045 This is why a parent would say, don't touch the hot stove 520 00:37:42.195 --> 00:37:43.485 because they're training them 521 00:37:43.485 --> 00:37:45.885 and showing them this is the way that leads to freedom 522 00:37:46.065 --> 00:37:47.245 and less pain for you. 523 00:37:48.705 --> 00:37:51.365 If God wants that for us, why wouldn't we want 524 00:37:51.365 --> 00:37:52.485 that for ourselves? 525 00:37:52.945 --> 00:37:54.445 If God wants that for us, 526 00:37:54.585 --> 00:37:56.045 why wouldn't we want that for ourselves? 527 00:37:56.465 --> 00:38:00.765 Do we have, do we think we have better information? 528 00:38:02.655 --> 00:38:05.115 Do we think we have better information? 529 00:38:06.365 --> 00:38:09.425 And as we continue into verse three, and, 530 00:38:09.445 --> 00:38:10.865 and then I want you to be aware of this. 531 00:38:11.145 --> 00:38:13.345 'cause as you're studying the Bible for yourself, one 532 00:38:13.345 --> 00:38:15.625 of the key things that you must do is you're reading 533 00:38:15.685 --> 00:38:17.905 and you're looking and you're making observations. 534 00:38:18.605 --> 00:38:19.985 And one way to make observations. 535 00:38:19.985 --> 00:38:21.025 What are things that are similar? 536 00:38:22.195 --> 00:38:25.895 And what we see in the next verses the the second part 537 00:38:25.895 --> 00:38:29.055 of three through verse six, Paul makes three statements 538 00:38:29.055 --> 00:38:32.895 that start with the word that they start with that. 539 00:38:33.195 --> 00:38:34.975 But now remember we're asking the question, 540 00:38:35.085 --> 00:38:36.645 what does God want for me? 541 00:38:36.825 --> 00:38:38.845 And perhaps you're thinking so far, 542 00:38:39.145 --> 00:38:41.205 it doesn't sound super duper promising. 543 00:38:41.865 --> 00:38:44.365 And maybe you're thinking, I thought this series was about 544 00:38:44.765 --> 00:38:47.245 families or family of families or something about families. 545 00:38:47.305 --> 00:38:49.485 I'm not getting any of that. Listen, hang 546 00:38:49.485 --> 00:38:50.725 with me, hang with me. 547 00:38:50.995 --> 00:38:53.205 Paul now moves into his plan 548 00:38:53.515 --> 00:38:55.085 that goes towards sanctification. 549 00:38:55.485 --> 00:38:58.485 Remember the first part of verse three, what does god's will 550 00:38:59.145 --> 00:39:00.205 our sanctification? 551 00:39:00.665 --> 00:39:02.245 And then he starts with that first that 552 00:39:02.555 --> 00:39:05.285 that you abstain from sexual immorality. 553 00:39:05.945 --> 00:39:07.125 Now why is this a big deal? 554 00:39:07.305 --> 00:39:09.045 Why of all the things that Paul could have talked about, 555 00:39:09.045 --> 00:39:10.805 why does he bring this up? 556 00:39:11.505 --> 00:39:14.125 Now he's writing to a church Thessalonica. 557 00:39:14.515 --> 00:39:17.245 This was a port city, it was a significant city, 558 00:39:17.425 --> 00:39:20.605 but it was also a very sexually loose city. 559 00:39:20.775 --> 00:39:23.165 There were no laws to prohibit anything. 560 00:39:23.165 --> 00:39:26.565 Basically anything went. Anything went. 561 00:39:27.265 --> 00:39:29.845 And so when Paul uses the term sexual immorality, 562 00:39:29.845 --> 00:39:31.605 this is a massively broad term. 563 00:39:31.705 --> 00:39:32.725 It covers everything. 564 00:39:32.945 --> 00:39:35.965 It includes any and every form of sexual practice that lies 565 00:39:35.965 --> 00:39:39.225 outside of God's will marriage out 566 00:39:39.445 --> 00:39:43.425 or sex outside of marriage, adultery, homosexuality, 567 00:39:43.555 --> 00:39:46.745 pedophilia, prostitution, bestiality. 568 00:39:47.285 --> 00:39:48.345 And see, all 569 00:39:48.345 --> 00:39:50.465 of these things are covered with this one phrase. 570 00:39:50.885 --> 00:39:53.065 And the reason this is a big deal to Paul is 571 00:39:53.065 --> 00:39:55.225 because it's all tolerated in Thessalonica. 572 00:39:55.255 --> 00:39:58.225 It's all tolerated. And therefore it's a big deal to him. 573 00:39:58.225 --> 00:39:59.825 And he felt like this is a priority 574 00:39:59.825 --> 00:40:01.865 because of the, the permissiveness 575 00:40:01.885 --> 00:40:03.985 and the pervasiveness of this going on. 576 00:40:04.055 --> 00:40:07.355 This could be a problem for the people. Let me talk to him. 577 00:40:07.415 --> 00:40:09.195 And maybe you're thinking in your head like, well, 578 00:40:09.315 --> 00:40:11.035 I mean at least our culture's not like that. 579 00:40:14.515 --> 00:40:16.795 Actually, it doesn't sound that much different, does it? 580 00:40:17.135 --> 00:40:19.675 We live in a sex craze, sexually confused culture. 581 00:40:20.535 --> 00:40:23.315 The church has been washed over and affected by it. 582 00:40:23.335 --> 00:40:26.715 And at a high level, so much to the point 583 00:40:26.715 --> 00:40:29.075 that if the church even takes a stand, 584 00:40:29.095 --> 00:40:32.395 if it finds some boldness and takes a stand on God's word 585 00:40:32.395 --> 00:40:35.115 and pushes back against the way the ways of culture 586 00:40:36.455 --> 00:40:39.635 and some of their beliefs, we are criticized 587 00:40:39.735 --> 00:40:42.955 and called mean-spirited, narrow-minded and hatem mongers. 588 00:40:44.685 --> 00:40:46.415 Well, if we're gonna be faithful to God's word 589 00:40:46.415 --> 00:40:49.055 and we're gonna ob be obedient to him, how do we respond? 590 00:40:49.055 --> 00:40:50.615 Because the lines have become 591 00:40:50.755 --> 00:40:52.775 so blurred sexually in our culture 592 00:40:53.045 --> 00:40:54.455 that almost anything goes. 593 00:40:55.875 --> 00:40:57.615 And so how do we lean into that? 594 00:40:57.915 --> 00:41:00.215 How can we come across that we're not being hateful 595 00:41:00.915 --> 00:41:02.975 or super critical after all? 596 00:41:03.295 --> 00:41:06.015 I mean when we pause and step back, we think about it. 597 00:41:06.395 --> 00:41:08.575 We have passions as well. 598 00:41:10.195 --> 00:41:12.375 And notice that Paul doesn't use the word avoid 599 00:41:12.375 --> 00:41:13.815 because the word avoid is too weak. 600 00:41:13.995 --> 00:41:17.855 The word he uses as abstained complete abstinence. 601 00:41:18.035 --> 00:41:19.935 Now notice, don't read things into 602 00:41:19.935 --> 00:41:21.015 the text that aren't fair. 603 00:41:22.885 --> 00:41:26.295 He's not saying that sex is bad or to avoid it altogether. 604 00:41:26.425 --> 00:41:29.015 Understand that sex is a gift from God and it, 605 00:41:29.035 --> 00:41:30.415 but it has become twisted 606 00:41:30.435 --> 00:41:34.045 and distorted by the fall like everything else. 607 00:41:34.305 --> 00:41:36.325 And it needs to be redeemed. 608 00:41:38.585 --> 00:41:41.475 It's just tricky. When we get into sin issues, 609 00:41:42.735 --> 00:41:45.995 my sin always, it seems reasonable to me. 610 00:41:46.355 --> 00:41:48.395 I can find a way to justify my sin. 611 00:41:48.535 --> 00:41:50.035 But when I look at you and your sin, 612 00:41:50.035 --> 00:41:52.595 your sin looks inexcusable. 613 00:41:53.515 --> 00:41:55.085 Another way to say this is 614 00:41:55.625 --> 00:41:57.685 is I judge myself by my intentions. 615 00:41:57.765 --> 00:42:01.045 I judge you by your actions. That's tough for us. 616 00:42:01.105 --> 00:42:02.165 How do we live in that space 617 00:42:02.185 --> 00:42:04.445 and respond to culture in a way that's fair, 618 00:42:04.445 --> 00:42:05.685 that in a way that's honest. 619 00:42:06.505 --> 00:42:08.805 One Bible scholar, John Stotz says this way, 620 00:42:08.805 --> 00:42:13.435 when he is talking about this passage, he says, sex 621 00:42:14.095 --> 00:42:15.595 has a God-given contents, 622 00:42:16.345 --> 00:42:19.035 God-given context in the first part of four. 623 00:42:19.535 --> 00:42:21.355 And that's marriage between a man and a woman. 624 00:42:21.575 --> 00:42:23.355 And then he says, and marriage 625 00:42:23.495 --> 00:42:26.835 or sex has a God-given style, holiness and honor. 626 00:42:27.495 --> 00:42:28.915 And we get into the next part 627 00:42:28.915 --> 00:42:30.355 of verse four, that's what we see. 628 00:42:30.585 --> 00:42:32.755 It's this idea of can you control your body? 629 00:42:33.785 --> 00:42:37.715 That there's the second that that each of you know, 630 00:42:37.975 --> 00:42:40.795 and this isn't about knowing facts or knowing information. 631 00:42:40.865 --> 00:42:43.195 It's knowing it in such a way that you can apply it 632 00:42:43.375 --> 00:42:45.915 to reach a certain goal or accomplish a desire. 633 00:42:48.215 --> 00:42:51.155 How to control the idea of gain mastery over. 634 00:42:52.495 --> 00:42:55.675 And so that you, you, you're not responding to your body, 635 00:42:55.675 --> 00:42:57.195 but you're telling your body what to do 636 00:42:57.195 --> 00:42:59.755 because you're living a life of discipline and holiness. 637 00:43:02.015 --> 00:43:05.235 Can you gain mastery, mastery over your own body? 638 00:43:06.295 --> 00:43:09.235 And it's just interesting, it's interesting to me and 639 00:43:10.215 --> 00:43:13.355 and it's, it feels and seems counterintuitive sometimes, 640 00:43:13.695 --> 00:43:16.435 but what honored God satisfies us. 641 00:43:17.695 --> 00:43:20.675 But often we're afraid to honor God or go the way of God 642 00:43:20.675 --> 00:43:23.035 because we're afraid we're gonna miss out on satisfaction. 643 00:43:24.315 --> 00:43:25.735 And then Paul's talking about the other. 644 00:43:26.075 --> 00:43:28.535 And for us, we live in a sex craze culture. 645 00:43:28.875 --> 00:43:31.015 How are we gonna respond and live at that out? 646 00:43:31.015 --> 00:43:32.735 Because temptation abounds. 647 00:43:32.995 --> 00:43:36.175 And if you are prone to that, I mean you don't have 648 00:43:36.175 --> 00:43:37.655 to go far, you don't have to go looking 649 00:43:37.675 --> 00:43:38.975 for it, it'll find you. 650 00:43:39.835 --> 00:43:41.735 And so in that space, are you looking 651 00:43:42.075 --> 00:43:45.255 and trying to live as close to the line as possible? 652 00:43:48.025 --> 00:43:50.125 Or are you looking for how can I protect myself 653 00:43:50.125 --> 00:43:52.005 and make sure I'm further back from the line? 654 00:43:52.075 --> 00:43:53.925 Because the closer you live to the line, 655 00:43:54.265 --> 00:43:55.725 the more opportunity you have 656 00:43:55.725 --> 00:43:57.045 or the more vulnerable you are. 657 00:43:57.065 --> 00:43:59.085 If something happens, you slip, you fall 658 00:43:59.195 --> 00:44:00.765 that you go straight over the edge. 659 00:44:01.665 --> 00:44:03.355 But the further you back, you, you, 660 00:44:03.355 --> 00:44:06.275 you give yourself more margin, more room. 661 00:44:08.025 --> 00:44:11.435 Paul encourages the thesal kins, 662 00:44:11.435 --> 00:44:13.875 he's a in verse five, not in the passion. 663 00:44:13.975 --> 00:44:15.155 How are you supposed to live this out? 664 00:44:15.175 --> 00:44:17.395 Not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles 665 00:44:18.055 --> 00:44:19.315 who do not know God. 666 00:44:19.505 --> 00:44:22.035 He's saying that we should be noticeably different. 667 00:44:23.015 --> 00:44:25.155 We shouldn't look like the rest of the world. 668 00:44:25.215 --> 00:44:27.315 We should not look like unbelievers. 669 00:44:28.295 --> 00:44:31.035 And when he says passion, he means uncontrolled desires. 670 00:44:31.475 --> 00:44:34.365 When he says lust, he's referring to outta control cravings. 671 00:44:34.545 --> 00:44:37.245 But I want us to not get too bogged down 672 00:44:37.245 --> 00:44:40.445 and too drilled in that lust is only something sexual 673 00:44:40.595 --> 00:44:42.125 because it can go beyond that. 674 00:44:42.185 --> 00:44:44.005 You can have lust for money, you can have lust 675 00:44:44.005 --> 00:44:48.205 for financial security, lust for, uh, acceptance and control 676 00:44:48.505 --> 00:44:49.725 or accomplishment. 677 00:44:50.505 --> 00:44:54.485 See, the danger of lust is this, that we are using others 678 00:44:54.945 --> 00:44:57.045 for our own pleasure and for our own power. 679 00:44:59.285 --> 00:45:00.825 And this is what he's concerned about. 680 00:45:01.795 --> 00:45:06.205 Don't abuse, don't mess up or mess with your brothers 681 00:45:06.425 --> 00:45:08.765 and sisters in Christ, your fellow believers. 682 00:45:09.225 --> 00:45:11.285 And for me here, we cannot help 683 00:45:11.305 --> 00:45:13.525 but pause when we're going through something like this 684 00:45:13.985 --> 00:45:18.645 and wonder, can God satisfy my desires and my passions? 685 00:45:18.645 --> 00:45:22.605 Because we have 'em, we have desires, we have passions, 686 00:45:22.605 --> 00:45:23.605 but what are we gonna do with them? 687 00:45:24.265 --> 00:45:26.485 Can God satisfy my desires 688 00:45:26.865 --> 00:45:29.925 or can he help me at least align them and control them? 689 00:45:32.095 --> 00:45:34.475 And then as Paul goes to verse six, 690 00:45:34.735 --> 00:45:36.435 we find the third that statement. 691 00:45:36.735 --> 00:45:38.875 But this is around the idea of respecting others, 692 00:45:40.005 --> 00:45:43.835 respecting others that no one transgress 693 00:45:43.835 --> 00:45:45.595 and wrong his brothers in this matter. 694 00:45:45.615 --> 00:45:48.635 And the matter in this context is sexual immorality. 695 00:45:50.615 --> 00:45:53.875 But he's saying don't sin against or defraud. 696 00:45:53.875 --> 00:45:56.155 Don't live selfless selfishly 697 00:45:56.415 --> 00:45:58.315 or don't be greedy towards the other one. 698 00:45:58.325 --> 00:46:01.395 Don't take something from somebody, um, 699 00:46:01.825 --> 00:46:03.315 that hasn't given that to you. 700 00:46:03.845 --> 00:46:05.715 Don't take something for personal gain 701 00:46:05.715 --> 00:46:07.395 or pleasure at someone else's expense. 702 00:46:08.615 --> 00:46:12.115 And I guess you would ask it this way, ask it this way. 703 00:46:12.495 --> 00:46:15.675 Are you using people or are you serving people? 704 00:46:16.425 --> 00:46:18.515 When you show up with a group of people, are you looking 705 00:46:18.515 --> 00:46:19.675 what you can get from them? 706 00:46:19.895 --> 00:46:21.515 Or are you looking at through the lens of 707 00:46:21.515 --> 00:46:22.955 what can I do for them? 708 00:46:24.225 --> 00:46:26.635 What can I do for them? How can I best serve them? 709 00:46:26.635 --> 00:46:28.715 Because Paul says it this way, when he is writing 710 00:46:28.715 --> 00:46:30.795 to the believers in Rome, love one another 711 00:46:30.795 --> 00:46:32.115 with brotherly affection, 712 00:46:32.965 --> 00:46:34.995 outdo one another in showing honor. 713 00:46:37.015 --> 00:46:38.825 What if that became the commitment? 714 00:46:39.495 --> 00:46:41.465 Like what are y'all doing? We trying to outdo one another. 715 00:46:41.885 --> 00:46:43.585 Now I don't know what it looks like at your house, 716 00:46:43.585 --> 00:46:45.865 but at our house we're competitive about everything. 717 00:46:46.805 --> 00:46:48.465 Who, I mean who you're gonna turn the light 718 00:46:48.465 --> 00:46:49.625 off first before we go to bed. 719 00:46:49.705 --> 00:46:51.505 I mean everything's competitive. 720 00:46:51.605 --> 00:46:54.105 But what if that became what we were striving 721 00:46:54.115 --> 00:46:57.105 after to outdo one another and showing honor? 722 00:46:58.005 --> 00:46:59.625 And then we look back at Paul like, 723 00:46:59.625 --> 00:47:00.665 why is he saying this again? 724 00:47:00.895 --> 00:47:02.105 This is why he's saying it. 725 00:47:02.105 --> 00:47:05.585 Because the Lord is an avenger in all these things. 726 00:47:05.845 --> 00:47:06.985 As we told you beforehand, 727 00:47:07.365 --> 00:47:10.945 and we solemnly warned you, this is a big deal 728 00:47:10.945 --> 00:47:12.345 because God is holy. 729 00:47:13.245 --> 00:47:15.985 He can't just wave away sin, it has to be dealt with. 730 00:47:16.965 --> 00:47:19.545 And he comes again to the goal as he turns to verse seven, 731 00:47:20.205 --> 00:47:24.145 for God has, God has not called us to impurity, 732 00:47:24.765 --> 00:47:29.285 but in holiness for God has not called us impurity. 733 00:47:29.285 --> 00:47:34.165 But in holiness, God's purpose in salvation has always been 734 00:47:34.185 --> 00:47:37.325 to produce a holy people, a people that are committed 735 00:47:37.325 --> 00:47:40.405 to him, that are devoted to him, that are de dedicated 736 00:47:40.405 --> 00:47:42.485 to him and to the service of him. 737 00:47:44.945 --> 00:47:47.645 And it's here where I want us to pause and just ask, 738 00:47:47.645 --> 00:47:49.685 because you're in the Family of Family series. 739 00:47:50.265 --> 00:47:51.445 How does my manhood 740 00:47:51.445 --> 00:47:56.165 or how does my womanhood come through my holiness? 741 00:47:56.625 --> 00:47:58.125 How does it come through my holiness? 742 00:47:58.625 --> 00:48:02.565 Do you love and serve or do you sacrifice and honor? 743 00:48:03.465 --> 00:48:04.565 Now this can be challenging. 744 00:48:04.675 --> 00:48:07.165 This can be challenging because some circumstances, 745 00:48:07.835 --> 00:48:11.565 some circumstances make it easier for an unholy version 746 00:48:11.585 --> 00:48:12.965 of ourselves to pop out. 747 00:48:14.435 --> 00:48:16.285 Have you guys heard of the five love languages? 748 00:48:16.305 --> 00:48:19.205 The book, the Five Love Languages? Yeah. 749 00:48:19.545 --> 00:48:22.845 Um, my wife's, my wife's love languages acts of service. 750 00:48:24.305 --> 00:48:27.445 Now what that means is if I'm doing a chore 751 00:48:27.445 --> 00:48:31.485 or something for her, then I get points now to the men, 752 00:48:31.545 --> 00:48:33.605 I'm giving you a bonus because since we're in this family 753 00:48:33.605 --> 00:48:34.725 of families, I'm gonna give you some 754 00:48:34.725 --> 00:48:35.805 bonus insight right here. 755 00:48:36.545 --> 00:48:39.125 How, how to do this if, if your wife is acts of service, 756 00:48:39.645 --> 00:48:42.405 I do not vacuum the floor when she's not in the house. 757 00:48:43.555 --> 00:48:47.165 Nope. She has to be there, uh, preferably on the couch so 758 00:48:47.165 --> 00:48:49.045 that I can get out and do it right in front of her 759 00:48:49.045 --> 00:48:51.325 so she can see me do it, see me speak her language. 760 00:48:51.545 --> 00:48:55.405 And also I get credit. Come on, that's a bonus. 761 00:48:57.585 --> 00:49:00.285 Now my love language is words of affirmation. 762 00:49:01.475 --> 00:49:03.015 And that what that means for you, 763 00:49:03.475 --> 00:49:04.895 and it imp applies to you that 764 00:49:04.895 --> 00:49:06.615 after this, when you see me, 765 00:49:06.845 --> 00:49:09.815 even if this was marginally mediocre, I need you 766 00:49:09.815 --> 00:49:13.575 to tell me you, you did a good job that that speaks to me. 767 00:49:13.755 --> 00:49:16.055 But now for my wife, now we talk about this, 768 00:49:16.115 --> 00:49:17.975 we talk about this, we're both wrestling 769 00:49:17.975 --> 00:49:19.775 through this at times. 770 00:49:21.035 --> 00:49:22.055 Our love languages 771 00:49:22.055 --> 00:49:24.495 for each other can be a spiritual opportunity 772 00:49:24.595 --> 00:49:25.775 or a growth opportunity. 773 00:49:28.525 --> 00:49:33.145 And it's not that she doesn't love me, it's this that words 774 00:49:33.145 --> 00:49:36.705 of affirmation, often as they try to come out of her, 775 00:49:36.725 --> 00:49:37.905 it doesn't feel authentic. 776 00:49:38.845 --> 00:49:41.345 It feels like flattery, like I'm making up stuff. 777 00:49:42.325 --> 00:49:45.425 But for me, from my perspective, this is how I know 778 00:49:45.425 --> 00:49:47.065 that she loves and appreciates me. 779 00:49:47.065 --> 00:49:48.585 This is what I need to hear from her. 780 00:49:49.685 --> 00:49:52.865 And so the problem is she's struggling to say 'em sometimes. 781 00:49:53.165 --> 00:49:56.065 But my, when my expectations aren't met, the temptation is 782 00:49:56.065 --> 00:50:00.825 for me to disconnect, to disengage or to pout. 783 00:50:02.115 --> 00:50:04.895 And here's another tip for you that never works, 784 00:50:05.805 --> 00:50:07.815 that has never worked, that has never made 785 00:50:07.835 --> 00:50:08.895 the situation better. 786 00:50:09.195 --> 00:50:11.695 The move towards christlikeness is never smooth. 787 00:50:11.945 --> 00:50:13.295 There are always opportunities 788 00:50:13.355 --> 00:50:14.615 for you to grow and to be tested. 789 00:50:14.875 --> 00:50:18.375 But nonetheless, this is a massive expectation in scripture. 790 00:50:18.705 --> 00:50:20.295 Peter, one of the close followers 791 00:50:20.295 --> 00:50:22.775 of Jesus makes it really clear, 792 00:50:23.595 --> 00:50:27.885 he says in one Peter one 14 through 16, as obedient, 793 00:50:28.045 --> 00:50:30.925 children do not be conformed to the passions 794 00:50:30.925 --> 00:50:32.165 of your former ignorance, 795 00:50:34.355 --> 00:50:36.215 but as he who called you as holy, 796 00:50:37.955 --> 00:50:42.215 you also be holy in all your conduct since it is written, 797 00:50:42.515 --> 00:50:43.775 you shall be holy. 798 00:50:44.875 --> 00:50:47.695 For I am holy. And Paul gives a glimpse, well, 799 00:50:47.695 --> 00:50:49.055 what does this holiness look like? 800 00:50:49.275 --> 00:50:51.255 How does it play out? If we're looking at it, 801 00:50:51.275 --> 00:50:52.855 how do we know it if we see it? 802 00:50:53.325 --> 00:50:55.935 Writing to the believers at Ephesus, he says, 803 00:50:56.035 --> 00:50:58.295 but sexual immorality and all impurity 804 00:50:58.315 --> 00:51:01.335 or covetness must not even be named among you 805 00:51:01.355 --> 00:51:03.055 as his proper among saints. 806 00:51:04.555 --> 00:51:08.495 Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk talk 807 00:51:08.635 --> 00:51:12.535 nor crude joking, which is, which are all out of place. 808 00:51:12.915 --> 00:51:17.035 But instead, let there be thanksgiving lead 809 00:51:17.035 --> 00:51:18.915 with gratitude not of this other stuff. 810 00:51:19.175 --> 00:51:20.915 And then nobody makes it clearer than Jesus 811 00:51:22.305 --> 00:51:23.755 when we're considering. 812 00:51:23.755 --> 00:51:25.595 Well, what are you asking from me? 813 00:51:26.225 --> 00:51:28.675 What are you asking from me to be committed to you, 814 00:51:28.675 --> 00:51:30.875 to be devoted to you, to be a follower of you? 815 00:51:31.145 --> 00:51:32.195 What are you asking for me? 816 00:51:32.195 --> 00:51:34.195 And it's the same for every single one of us. 817 00:51:35.015 --> 00:51:39.575 And you find it in Luke 9 23, that we are, we are 818 00:51:40.675 --> 00:51:41.935 if anyone would come 819 00:51:41.935 --> 00:51:45.795 after him, Jesus is saying, if anyone would come 820 00:51:45.795 --> 00:51:47.555 after me, let him deny himself, 821 00:51:48.105 --> 00:51:51.155 take up his cross and then follow him. 822 00:51:52.185 --> 00:51:56.835 Self-denial, dying to your old self to engage in the nude, 823 00:51:56.855 --> 00:51:58.035 the following of Christ. 824 00:51:58.335 --> 00:51:59.795 And then as we come to verse eight, 825 00:51:59.795 --> 00:52:01.275 we're back to Thessalonians. 826 00:52:02.625 --> 00:52:03.915 Paul issues a warning. 827 00:52:05.335 --> 00:52:08.995 He says, therefore, whoever disregards to despise 828 00:52:09.095 --> 00:52:12.715 or maybe even to cancel, whoever disregards this, the things 829 00:52:12.715 --> 00:52:14.475 that he said in this previous verses, 830 00:52:16.645 --> 00:52:18.395 disregards not man 831 00:52:20.795 --> 00:52:24.095 but God who gives his Holy Spirit to you. 832 00:52:24.315 --> 00:52:25.775 Let me start with the Holy Spirit part. 833 00:52:25.875 --> 00:52:28.775 So God gives the gift of himself in us to help us 834 00:52:28.875 --> 00:52:31.095 as we navigate this, as we're struggling 835 00:52:31.095 --> 00:52:32.735 and striving for our sanctification. 836 00:52:32.995 --> 00:52:34.335 He gives us this as a gift. 837 00:52:34.555 --> 00:52:35.815 But let me go back to the first part. 838 00:52:35.845 --> 00:52:40.055 This idea of disregarding disregard for God's design 839 00:52:40.765 --> 00:52:44.255 does damage to our manhood and to our womanhood. 840 00:52:44.955 --> 00:52:46.175 It does damage to it. 841 00:52:46.435 --> 00:52:49.615 We have greater inclination than to move from loving 842 00:52:49.715 --> 00:52:52.135 to unloving, from respectful to disrespectful, 843 00:52:52.205 --> 00:52:53.615 from helpful to hurtful. 844 00:52:54.645 --> 00:52:57.775 Whereas the early church Father Augustine said, he said, 845 00:52:57.775 --> 00:53:00.735 the this, the result of this actually flows 846 00:53:02.085 --> 00:53:03.935 from misaligned desires or loves. 847 00:53:04.725 --> 00:53:06.175 When our loves are outta whack, 848 00:53:06.175 --> 00:53:08.095 when our desires are outta whack, the things 849 00:53:08.095 --> 00:53:09.415 that we are chasing after 850 00:53:09.415 --> 00:53:11.495 and striving for when they're misplaced 851 00:53:11.495 --> 00:53:14.495 and out of line, then they take us to a bad place. 852 00:53:14.695 --> 00:53:17.295 Disregarding God affects all our relationships, 853 00:53:17.435 --> 00:53:19.015 but ultimately, ultimately listen. 854 00:53:19.655 --> 00:53:21.215 Ultimately it affects our 855 00:53:21.215 --> 00:53:22.655 relationship with our Heavenly Father. 856 00:53:26.205 --> 00:53:29.305 But if we get the vertical right, 857 00:53:30.465 --> 00:53:32.795 then the horizontal begins to come along. 858 00:53:33.625 --> 00:53:35.875 It's not easy, it's not easy, 859 00:53:36.615 --> 00:53:39.795 but the trajectory certainly improves. 860 00:53:41.175 --> 00:53:43.435 So back to the question, what does God want from me? 861 00:53:43.855 --> 00:53:45.275 Here's the answer to the question. 862 00:53:45.275 --> 00:53:47.755 What does God want from me? It's holiness. 863 00:53:48.545 --> 00:53:52.715 What God wants for you is holiness. 864 00:53:54.015 --> 00:53:57.435 Now this is a great, great question. 865 00:53:57.705 --> 00:53:59.555 I've wrestled with this as we get older, 866 00:53:59.615 --> 00:54:02.035 as we read the Bible more, as we pray more, 867 00:54:02.255 --> 00:54:05.155 as we do more devotions, as we go to more classes, 868 00:54:05.745 --> 00:54:06.915 does it get any easier? 869 00:54:09.185 --> 00:54:11.755 Well, in some ways, yes. 870 00:54:14.515 --> 00:54:16.135 But the struggle never goes away. 871 00:54:16.675 --> 00:54:19.295 And some of you know that earlier this year my mom passed 872 00:54:19.325 --> 00:54:21.215 away, but I wanna share 873 00:54:21.215 --> 00:54:22.695 with you one lesson I learned from her 874 00:54:22.915 --> 00:54:25.175 and watching her down the stretch of her life. 875 00:54:26.035 --> 00:54:28.295 And the lesson is this, ultimately the lesson is this. 876 00:54:28.295 --> 00:54:30.215 That the fight of faith is a fight to the finish. 877 00:54:30.515 --> 00:54:32.575 And she believed like JRA Tolkien, 878 00:54:33.245 --> 00:54:34.735 that there is some good in the world 879 00:54:34.795 --> 00:54:36.135 and it's worth fighting for. 880 00:54:36.715 --> 00:54:39.535 But the last two years of her life, she was confined 881 00:54:39.535 --> 00:54:40.775 to the bed for the most part. 882 00:54:40.775 --> 00:54:43.895 That's where she was. She was in the bed. 883 00:54:43.955 --> 00:54:45.695 And when you're in the bed and you can't go, 884 00:54:45.835 --> 00:54:47.415 and when you're in the bed, you're in your head. 885 00:54:47.485 --> 00:54:49.255 That means you're thinking a lot. 886 00:54:51.705 --> 00:54:53.845 And one day she told me, we were having a conversation. 887 00:54:53.845 --> 00:54:57.485 She says, clay, I've learned some things about myself 888 00:54:58.375 --> 00:55:02.515 while in this bed that I would've rather not have known. 889 00:55:05.275 --> 00:55:10.185 See, she had come face to face with face 890 00:55:10.185 --> 00:55:12.625 to face with what one of her favorite writers said 891 00:55:13.215 --> 00:55:15.785 when he wrote this, that we are more sinful 892 00:55:15.805 --> 00:55:18.425 and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe. 893 00:55:20.725 --> 00:55:23.225 Yet at the very same time, we are more loved 894 00:55:23.285 --> 00:55:26.945 and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope. 895 00:55:28.445 --> 00:55:31.025 See, besetting sins, sins that own us. 896 00:55:31.025 --> 00:55:32.505 My friend Tim, he calls it, 897 00:55:32.505 --> 00:55:34.945 these are our go-to sins when things get tough and weird 898 00:55:34.965 --> 00:55:36.785 and, and start, you know, outta line, 899 00:55:36.855 --> 00:55:38.465 then these, this is what we go to. 900 00:55:39.135 --> 00:55:40.505 This is what we go to for comfort. 901 00:55:40.655 --> 00:55:41.985 This is what we go to security, 902 00:55:42.205 --> 00:55:44.425 but our besetting sins, they are tough 903 00:55:45.085 --> 00:55:46.385 to get untangled from. 904 00:55:47.725 --> 00:55:50.065 And my mom, she struggled all the way to the end. 905 00:55:50.725 --> 00:55:52.385 Two, two things that we talked about. 906 00:55:53.205 --> 00:55:54.625 The idea of releasing control 907 00:55:54.625 --> 00:55:55.665 because she wanted to be in charge 908 00:55:55.665 --> 00:55:58.185 and she wanted to control the narrative of everything, 909 00:55:58.185 --> 00:56:02.805 including yours if she knew you, the idea 910 00:56:02.805 --> 00:56:03.805 of releasing control, 911 00:56:03.865 --> 00:56:06.165 but then also receiving God's unconditional love 912 00:56:06.165 --> 00:56:08.285 because of the way she was trained and the way she grew up. 913 00:56:08.305 --> 00:56:10.365 She felt like this was something that had to be earned, 914 00:56:11.065 --> 00:56:12.165 she had to be doing. 915 00:56:12.625 --> 00:56:14.125 And when you're on your back and you're confined 916 00:56:14.125 --> 00:56:15.205 to the bed, it's hard to do. 917 00:56:16.705 --> 00:56:20.565 And so she was fighting this all the way to the end. 918 00:56:21.425 --> 00:56:24.445 And what she was realizing as she learned to let go 919 00:56:24.445 --> 00:56:27.005 of control and learned to receive God's unconditional love 920 00:56:27.005 --> 00:56:30.965 and grace, was that God loved her so much 921 00:56:31.275 --> 00:56:35.525 that he sent his son to die as a substitute 922 00:56:36.945 --> 00:56:39.805 to take the place of her sinfulness that she sent, 923 00:56:39.805 --> 00:56:42.405 that God sent his son on this rescue mission 924 00:56:42.715 --> 00:56:44.445 because she couldn't do it. 925 00:56:46.465 --> 00:56:48.725 But God in his love for her did it for her. 926 00:56:49.945 --> 00:56:54.515 It's not from you, but it's for you. This is what God did. 927 00:56:55.185 --> 00:56:56.395 What a thought to think. 928 00:56:56.505 --> 00:57:00.915 This is what God did for, for, for you 929 00:57:02.215 --> 00:57:03.665 writing to the believers in Rome. 930 00:57:03.695 --> 00:57:05.185 This is the way Paul said it. 931 00:57:05.185 --> 00:57:09.465 If God is for us who can be against us, 932 00:57:10.085 --> 00:57:13.185 our satisfaction in him leads to our impact for him. 933 00:57:13.375 --> 00:57:15.705 When we begin to own and understand who he is 934 00:57:15.705 --> 00:57:18.145 and what he's done in us, then it begins to flow through us 935 00:57:18.205 --> 00:57:19.305 and impact others. 936 00:57:19.685 --> 00:57:21.185 How does it? How does that work? 937 00:57:21.685 --> 00:57:23.665 It happens when we begin to love and serve others 938 00:57:23.665 --> 00:57:25.985 because this is not gonna be new news to you, 939 00:57:27.085 --> 00:57:31.305 but we live among broken, abused, confused, hurting people. 940 00:57:32.175 --> 00:57:34.625 Many are deceived and feel worthless. 941 00:57:36.535 --> 00:57:38.945 They feel like they have no count, no value. 942 00:57:39.205 --> 00:57:41.825 And you know what we're related to some 943 00:57:41.825 --> 00:57:44.635 of them, but God. 944 00:57:45.655 --> 00:57:50.035 But God is sovereign, God is faithful and God is in control. 945 00:57:50.335 --> 00:57:53.035 God has a plan and he's working his plan and God is good 946 00:57:53.215 --> 00:57:56.395 and he's full of grace and he shows up. 947 00:57:57.215 --> 00:57:59.435 And then there's this mysterious part of it. 948 00:57:59.455 --> 00:58:00.515 Yes, God is sovereign. 949 00:58:00.535 --> 00:58:03.315 But on the other side of that, alongside that truth is 950 00:58:03.315 --> 00:58:04.635 that we are responsible. 951 00:58:06.155 --> 00:58:07.965 That we have an active role to play. 952 00:58:08.385 --> 00:58:11.405 We have a role to play in our pursuit of holiness 953 00:58:11.625 --> 00:58:14.045 and with our intimacy with Jesus. 954 00:58:16.475 --> 00:58:18.575 And as we near the end of our time, 955 00:58:20.525 --> 00:58:22.025 let me give you three initiatives 956 00:58:23.475 --> 00:58:25.285 that will help you grow in your holiness. 957 00:58:25.785 --> 00:58:29.445 The first one is this, proactively pursue, 958 00:58:30.695 --> 00:58:33.025 proactively pursue holiness. 959 00:58:33.945 --> 00:58:36.265 I mean, set a strategy, determine where you want 960 00:58:36.265 --> 00:58:38.385 to be in five years and then go after it. 961 00:58:38.635 --> 00:58:40.105 Bring your best energy to it. 962 00:58:40.125 --> 00:58:42.625 The second initiative, discipline yourself daily. 963 00:58:43.165 --> 00:58:45.905 Listen, you're never gonna drift towards holiness. 964 00:58:45.965 --> 00:58:48.145 You're never gonna drift into sanctification. 965 00:58:48.525 --> 00:58:50.225 You're never gonna just doze off one 966 00:58:50.225 --> 00:58:51.345 night and wake up more holy. 967 00:58:51.625 --> 00:58:52.785 I mean, that's not how it's gonna work. 968 00:58:53.045 --> 00:58:54.865 You've gotta wake up, you've gotta show up 969 00:58:54.865 --> 00:58:57.065 and you've gotta put into practice the disciplines. 970 00:58:58.405 --> 00:59:00.865 You've gotta put, I mean, whatever you have to do, wake up 971 00:59:00.865 --> 00:59:02.185 and put your Bible right there so 972 00:59:02.185 --> 00:59:03.665 that you trip over it first thing in the morning. 973 00:59:03.845 --> 00:59:06.625 Ah, yes, I have to do that. Make discipline to pray. 974 00:59:07.725 --> 00:59:10.145 The third initiative is seek loving accountability. 975 00:59:10.345 --> 00:59:13.905 I can't tell you how important this is. 976 00:59:14.965 --> 00:59:17.465 You need a friend to come alongside you who is willing 977 00:59:17.465 --> 00:59:19.425 to take responsibility for your holiness. 978 00:59:20.205 --> 00:59:23.085 And what I mean by that is that they know you so well 979 00:59:23.085 --> 00:59:24.765 because you have opened your life to them 980 00:59:24.915 --> 00:59:26.765 that they can see maybe even 981 00:59:26.765 --> 00:59:28.645 before you when things are getting wobbly. 982 00:59:29.585 --> 00:59:31.365 And they will call you into repentance. 983 00:59:31.365 --> 00:59:33.245 They will call you an alarm. 984 00:59:33.735 --> 00:59:37.805 Alarm will sound and they will exhort you to come back so 985 00:59:37.805 --> 00:59:39.805 that you don't train wreck your life. 986 00:59:42.665 --> 00:59:45.685 We need accountability, loving accountability, 987 00:59:47.085 --> 00:59:50.065 loving accountability that will not give us a pass 988 00:59:50.165 --> 00:59:52.695 for our sin, but they won't hold it against 989 00:59:52.695 --> 00:59:54.455 us and walk away. 990 00:59:54.795 --> 00:59:57.455 But what if out beyond the horizon now, 991 00:59:57.455 --> 00:59:58.935 think distant, think future. 992 00:59:59.965 --> 01:00:03.055 Just par, just, just beyond where you can see clearly 993 01:00:05.615 --> 01:00:08.025 further than what seems like it makes sense. 994 01:00:08.155 --> 01:00:09.585 God's asking you to do something. You're like, ah, 995 01:00:09.685 --> 01:00:10.825 it just doesn't feel right. 996 01:00:11.175 --> 01:00:13.345 That doesn't make sense. What if there? 997 01:00:13.345 --> 01:00:17.385 What if in that place is something that God wants for you 998 01:00:17.695 --> 01:00:21.145 that if you received it would totally change the path 999 01:00:21.145 --> 01:00:23.625 of your life and the health of your family? 1000 01:00:26.175 --> 01:00:27.555 If you embraced that gift 1001 01:00:27.575 --> 01:00:28.995 and stepped into that opportunity, 1002 01:00:29.265 --> 01:00:30.715 what would that mean for your family? 1003 01:00:31.105 --> 01:00:34.955 What would be different? What would your dedication 1004 01:00:35.015 --> 01:00:37.595 and devotion to Jesus and his church look like? 1005 01:00:39.655 --> 01:00:41.755 And then my question is, what would that mean 1006 01:00:42.655 --> 01:00:43.995 for a family of families? 1007 01:00:44.465 --> 01:00:47.315 What would that mean for a particular family of families 1008 01:00:48.085 --> 01:00:49.635 known as Hope Community Church? 1009 01:00:51.935 --> 01:00:55.355 Now we'll press into that more next week 1010 01:00:55.455 --> 01:00:56.755 as we wrap up our series. 1011 01:00:57.575 --> 01:01:01.275 But let me leave you with this. Let's go after holiness. 1012 01:01:01.685 --> 01:01:03.955 Let's go after holiness with everything we have 1013 01:01:04.575 --> 01:01:05.835 and let's see what happens. 1014 01:01:06.455 --> 01:01:09.915 Let me pray for us. Dear Heavenly Father, thank you 1015 01:01:11.585 --> 01:01:13.475 that you're a coming down kind of God 1016 01:01:13.535 --> 01:01:16.595 who came on a rescue mission to give us hope in a future. 1017 01:01:18.085 --> 01:01:22.115 Thank you that you have a desire for us, what's best for us, 1018 01:01:22.735 --> 01:01:26.035 and you desire our sanctification towards holiness. 1019 01:01:26.705 --> 01:01:27.915 Lord, help us to understand 1020 01:01:27.915 --> 01:01:31.515 and realize that that is ultimately for our good 1021 01:01:32.015 --> 01:01:35.435 and we will find the greatest satisfaction and in this life 1022 01:01:35.535 --> 01:01:39.155 and the next when we press into you. 1023 01:01:40.055 --> 01:01:42.435 And Lord, it's in the strong name of Jesus that we pray. 1024 01:01:43.505 --> 01:01:44.505 Amen.