John Gunter: The book in front of you, I did not bring it today. We've been using it on Wednesday nights, and, I've had it requested to, turn this into something that everybody hears. We haven't had a big, crowd on Wednesday nights. There's some really good things, in this book, very small book, by Tom Rayner, and he is good at that. He writes very, succinctly, which I like.
I don't like big long books that just keep repeating themselves. But it says, 9 Traits of the Outwardly Focused Christian, and the book title is I Will. On the back, it asks a question, Could you be the answer to the problems you see? Now you can read that a couple of different ways. You can read this very pridefully, Oh yeah, I am the answer to all the problems, everything.
I am God's gift to all of you, right? But what we are getting at, and what this book gets at, is that oftentimes, what we are doing is really focusing on what you need to provide me. And so what we have turned, a lot of times what we have turned church into is some kind of consumer product. That it is just to be consumed and talked about, and did I like it today? Did I not like it today?
Did it touch my heart? Did it do x, y, and z for me? And this book pushes back against that because that's not what we're supposed to be about, is it? We are not here to worship ourselves. We are here to worship God.
In Scripture, when Jesus was asked what the greatest commandments were, love God, and what was the second one? Church, tell me. Love your neighbor. And so as we assemble, we should be looking for every opportunity to help encourage, to help love, to help show support to all of our brothers and sisters in Christ. Amen?
That's what we're here for. But oftentimes, that is not the case. The story that Tom Rayner begins with is a story about a lady named Heather. She, was she kind of married into a church. You've been there before?
Some of you married into this church. You were not a part of it. You married someone and now you are. This is this is your church because of that. And, Heather's story is she fit in very well because of that, had family ties to the church, But eventually, over time, her marriage started falling apart to the point where her and her husband got a divorce.
And so, after that, she was kind of a little bit, you know, awkward situation. His family goes to the church, but she kinda got turned off the church because she started feeling over time that things weren't going well there. Like, she wasn't getting what she wanted out of this church. And so, she spent 3 or 4 years not going to church at all. She had a few young kids, and finally, she decided, Well, you know what?
I do want the kids in church, and maybe it's time to start getting back. And so she started visiting churches, and as she visited churches, she was quick to kind of point out the flaws. Well, I see that your church has this issue or this church has this issue. Well, she found a church that, she thought kind of stood out above the rest, but still had its issues. And so she sat down with the pastor and his wife, and she really wanted to kind of lay it out there for them.
Yeah, I visit all these churches, and yeah, yours is the best, but it still has a lot of problems. And so as they sat down in her house and had this conversation, she brought up an article that was, recently put out about things that turn people off of church, things that people don't like when they show up to church. Showing up and you don't have any information about the church, or the church is dirty, or the kids' area is not good, you know, and all of these different things. And she kind of laid that out, like, I see these issues and I agree with this article. And both the pastor and his wife said, well, yeah, those are things to notice, But she said this, she said, we leaders in churches can certainly heed its message, that being the articles you brought up, but you could be viewing the church in the wrong way.
Maybe you should not be asking what you can get out of church, but how God would have you serve through a church. Instead of saying, I want, consider saying, I will. And that's going to be for our consideration every week that we talk about this series. To not be saying, I want, but consider saying, I will. Because that's a different attitude.
Is it not? We can come and we can desire certain things. I don't know if you'll find a church that that fits every desire or preference that you have. Maybe this one does. I'd love to talk to you, like, hey, we do this perfectly.
That'd be a great encouragement for a preacher. You know, we don't get that, you know. Everything was perfect, right? But we often have these little things, Well I wish this was this way, and that was that way, and what we end up doing again, is feeling like those preferences that I have are important, and we begin to focus on ourselves instead of the big picture. So it's all about having the right attitude, and so what we're going to talk about this morning is what that attitude looks like.
I am a unifying church member. Does that describe you this morning? I am a unifying church member. I bring people together. Oftentimes, I don't know if you know this, but churches don't do that.
Have you ever seen that? People can be divisive. And in fact, we're gonna start there in Titus 3. What is said here in Titus, As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful, he is self condemned. Now, when it talks about someone who stirs up division, the the word is, again, divisive, stirs up division, factious.
This idea that I wanna get you to my side. I wanna stir this up and really make it seem like a big deal and kind of draw these divisions. You ever experienced that in church? Yeah. And the reason I bring this up, you see how how strong a warning this is.
This is nothing to be playing with. Warn them once, warn them twice, then have what? Nothing more to do with them. Why? Because all you're doing in that moment is allowing someone to divide up the church, to split up the church.
And that's what we get when we get people just griping and fussing. Church people wouldn't do that. I'm talking to the choir. But we began to fuss and fight and get on the phone and call people and stir things up, and then we still make excuses for why we can do that, and why that's a good idea. But this is what Scripture says about being divisive.
Warn them twice, then have nothing to do with them. Because that's not what we're about, church. We're about unifying that I am, I strive to be a unifying church member. From Ephesians 4:1-three, I, therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called. Again, calling Christians to be Christians.
With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit and the bond of peace. That's a lot of highlighted words up there, I know. But what he's saying there is, guess what? Paul says in another place, you should all have the same mind. I think sometimes we take it too literally.
Do you think the apostle Paul assumed at any point in life that a bunch of people are gonna agree on every single thing? No. Absolutely not. And all you have to do is read this verse to know that he didn't think that. You have to have humility and gentleness with patience.
Now, you don't have to have patience if everything is going your way, do you? I just, man, I'm on a string of good luck right now, I've just gotta bear with it and get through this. That doesn't make sense, does it? I don't have to work on my humility, right? Gentleness, patience, bearing with one another in love.
It is love that allows you to do this, right? To have this humility, to work with others who, guess what, may not agree with you all the time. And it says eager, that word there could could also mean zealous, like, I really want this to happen. Again, asking the question this morning, is this you? But I am eager to have this happen, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace.
And often, again, that's not what we get in church. We don't have this eagerness to unity and peace and love. We have an eagerness to divide, and draw out, and gossip. You ever had someone that really likes drama? Y'all know those people.
Don't point them out in here. You ever had someone say it, and people will say it, they'll bring up something, and they'll say it in the most dramatic way possible. You ever had someone do that, but the thing they said really wasn't that bad? Like, it wasn't a big deal? Can it always begins like this, doesn't it?
Can you believe, or did you hear? And they spit that out and you go, oh, you said that. That was dramatic. Play the music behind that. But it wasn't that dramatic.
But we get to a point where we desire not peace and unity, but can we get some excitement in here and divide? And that gets us the negative kind of draws us in. Anybody watch the news lately? Was it just filled with one positive story after another? You just got done with that and you thought, my goodness, what a world we live in.
I just love it. How lucky are we? No, because what draws in the views? What catches the eyeballs? It's the negative.
It's the let me bring something up that is dramatic, and what we don't get is this. John 17:20, Jesus praying here, I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word that they may all be, what? 1, just as you father are in me and I in you that they also may be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me, I have given to them that they may be 1 even as we are. Yes.
I in them and you in me that they may become perfectly so that the world may know that you sent me and love them even as you loved me. The way that the world knows about Jesus and His relationship to the Father is the way we come in unity and we become 1. Now again, I don't think Jesus, being in human form, thought either that everyone was going to have the exact same thoughts and agree on everything all the time. That just doesn't make sense, does it? Unity is not uniformity or conformity to just one single idea.
Unity is understanding the big picture and unifying under that. That is the love, grace, and mercy of God. That's what we unify under. Number 2, I am a prayerful church member. Is that you this morning?
From Ephesians 6:18, praying at all times in the spirit with all prayer and supplication. It's kind of an idea of almost begging, like, I I want I desire this. With all prayer and supplication to that end, keep alert with all perseverance, again, making supplication for who? All the saints. Not just me, myself, and I.
Right? I remember being in Bible class when I was young and we said, this is how you pray, Jesus, others, and yourself, right? Joy. Anybody grow up hearing that? How much time do you actually spend praying for others?
How much time do you spend praying for others with whom you know there's a disagreement? I don't like that one at all, preacher. I like praying for people that I get along with perfectly right. People that are in my house, people that I know love me back, people that, you know, more often than not, we agree. Those people I know that don't really agree with me or I have a preference and they have another one, that's a little harder.
But he says, you do this, you you with all prayer and supplication, you desire this for all the saints. For everyone seeking not just your will and what you want, but actually caring about what other people want, desire, what the best is for them. That's a different attitude, isn't it? Because now I'm not consumer and judge over what all is going on, but now I'm invested in you and what you care about. From Colossians 1, verses 9 and 10, and so from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will and all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.
Paul says, I'm not just going to tell you about it. That's what we do. This is who we are, is that we care enough. We have not stopped praying for you. And church, I'm just gonna tell you, I don't think we pray enough for each other.
I think often we are so focused on self, me and mine, that we are not praying for each other. Imagine what that does to relationships when we sit back and we pray for each other. Think about that person with whom you have a disagreement right now and, you know, it's been bothering me. Have you prayed for him? Now, I'm not meaning, hey, god, would you fix their mind because they're wrong?
That's normally the easy prayer to pray. Right? But, God, would you bring us closer together? God, would you bless them? Oh, yes.
We have a disagreement or yes. We have x, y, and z. But god, would you bless their life? Would you bring them peace? Do we do that?
I am a joyful church member. Are you joyful? Sure. I think the antithesis to a divisive person, a dramatic person is a joyful person. I have yet to meet I would also classify as joyful.
Because the joyful people are just different. Because the joyful people are just different. They love in a way that I can't explain. The divisive person that you're thinking of that's off also joyful, I think that's psychotic. I I think that's what that is.
That I can be joyful in my division, I think, is psychotic, not joyful. Don't make excuses for them. It's raw. But I strive to be a joyful church member. When you start to send a text later today or a phone call about what you didn't like, like, am I a joyful church member?
Am I a unifying church member? Have I even prayed about any of this? That's the same scripture I just had. In in, 1 Corinthians 1227, now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it. We cannot be divisive, upset, cranky people and not realize that we are part of a body.
Paul says, a scripture that should have been before that that I messed up, to rejoice always. Did you catch that? Now that is very hard to do, especially if you're going through something, especially a health issue, something's gone wrong, you didn't expect. What about a time when you and a brother or sister didn't get along? How joyful are you?
Is it easy to rejoice in those times? But he says, to rejoice always, and then he says, you are the body of Christ and individually members of it. Now, I didn't put on on the screen today the scripture about how each body each part has its own function, and we know that. How much do we think about that person too is a member of the same body? That we are parts trying to make this thing work together.
We're not the same part. We're not gifted with the same things. We don't all believe or think the same things, but we are parts of the body. And as a part of the body, as a member of this church, you have a decision to make about your attitude. Will you be joyful?
I am a sacrificial church member. That's a tough word right there, isn't it? I am a sacrificial church member. Philippians 2. Paul says this, Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men, and being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on the cross.
Paul says, if Jesus didn't think elevating himself to the point of God was the thing to be achieved, why are you doing it? Because that's what this is about is, where do I sit on the priority list? Who am I? How important am I? How important are the things that I think?
Is it important that I get my way? Can I sacrifice in some way to move out of the way for someone else and the betterment of them and their family? Can I sacrifice in any way? That's what Jesus did. There in in 5 again, he says, he emptied himself, in verse 7, by taking the form of a, what, servant.
I said in class this morning, when we went through, the series on leadership, it seems like almost everybody missed the whole point of the series on leadership. We got off track somewhere. The whole point of the series on leadership is that everyone in church, no matter what you do, whether you are a minister, an elder, a teacher, you don't do any of that, you come and you visit, whatever, you are a servant. If you come to church leadership and your only question is who is in charge, you will not find that in Scripture. But you will find that you become a servant.
That's the way, one of those paradoxes in Scripture, the way up is down. You be a servant. The enemy, I hope that showed up, good. Y'all got the better projector, the enemy of a good attitude is selfishness. Now, I think we understand this, We understand that our desires can get in the way, but I think often, what we get is a little, a little off.
We can see things clearly in other people, but not ourselves. From Mark 10:35, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came up to him and said, he's talking to Jesus, teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you. That's a big ask, isn't it? John, would you do me a favor? Well, tell me what it is first.
I'll let you know. And he said to them, what do you want me to do for you? And they said to him, grant us to sit 1 at your right hand and 1 at your left in your glory. Jesus said to them, you do not know what you're asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I drink or to be baptized with the baptism with which I'm baptized?
And they said to him, we are able. And Jesus said to them, the cup that I drink, you will drink. And with the baptism which I am baptized, you will be baptized. But to sit at my right hand or at my left is not mine to grant, but it is for those for whom it has been prepared. And when the 10 heard it, they began to be indignant at James and John.
Why do you think that is? James and John have just elevated themselves above everyone else. Haven't they? Now, I assume at this point, they're still thinking there's some kind of earthly kingdom that's gonna happen. But, whether that's earthly or spiritual that they have in mind, their request is, would you elevate us above the rest?
Now, maybe you won't be bold enough to say something like that here, but how many times do our actions show that that is exactly what we are choosing to do? That I am more important than you, I deserve this over you, And here's why. Here's all my reasons why. And we don't even consider the people we are trying to step on to do that. All the 10 were indignant at James and John.
I really want the rest of the story on this deal. Don't you? Jesus continues on. He says, Jesus called them to him and said to them, you know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them. Again, this is talking about authority.
This question of who goes where. The rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. We love authority. Who's in charge? But it shall not be so among you, but whoever would be great among you must be your servant.
And whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many. Jesus said, this is what I did. Just Paul's repeating what Jesus said. Right?
He said, I came to serve. I'm your teacher. You call me teacher. You call me Lord. You do the things that I do.
Right? I am lord of your life. You follow me. This is what I came to do is to serve, not to be served. But often, I think what we do is we come into church looking to be served, that all my needs are met, that everything goes the way I want, and if not, I'm gonna throw a fit.
I think we're a little off. And what I've noticed is, it seems like when people act this way, they have a lack of clarity in what is going on. They are just not seeing things correctly. Have you guys seen this trend now, paint your partner, paint your spouse? Have you all seen that?
Yes? No? So people will have a dinner party or something like that and wife will sit across from husband, husband across from wife, and they will paint each other, and at the end, they will reveal what those look like. Well, Katie and I had an opportunity to do this recently, and so this morning, with my wife's permission, so don't worry about that, you're going to get to see some of this. This is what I look like normally.
Handsome man, I know. Y'all calm down. This is what my wife saw as she sat across the table from me, and, this is what she drew. I have the hearing ability of a bat at this point. The blush is too strong.
I've never worn lip now. Not to just get on my wife about what she drew. I also drew something. This is what I saw as I sat across from my beautiful wife, And I am y'all y'all may or may not know this. I'm partially color blind.
If things are separate, I can see them pretty well. But if things blend in, like, you know, getting the right tone for something, I'm not doing that. So I ask if I could just draw, and that's what I did and brace yourself. This is what I drew. And this is actually fixed from where it was.
Her hair kept getting taller, and I don't know why. But sometimes I believe we are trying to do the right thing, and it just doesn't come out right. We are selfish people sometimes, and we don't mean to be. We're trying to work on. We're all in progress.
Right? We're all a work in progress. I need to get that off there, so y'all y'all are not dealing with that. But we're all a work in progress, are we not? So I think sometimes what we get is, I want to achieve this.
I know what I need to be doing, and I'm just messing it up. I know what my wife looks like. We've been married for 16 years this week. I know what she looks like. It's not that.
Okay? It is not that. And so sometimes I believe that's what we are doing, is we are trying to get it right, and we are just not getting it. But other times, I think we have completely missed it, and we now no longer care about getting it right. And that's the problem I want to talk to you about this morning.
Is, do you care? Do you care about your selfishness? Do you care about the sins that you see in yourself? You remember when we talked about the Fix Your Focus series, and I'll get off of that, From Ephesians 4 17-nineteen, now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do. In the futility of their minds.
They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to their hardness of heart. And he continues, they have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity and that callousness is what I wanna focus on. Have we become callous to our action? I'll tell you, and this is probably not breaking any news to you, but it's tough to be in ministry. It's tough to be shepherds and deacons of the church, because you catch a bunch of flack.
Did that surprise any of you? But what I see a lot of times, when people are upset is what I see what I see is selfishness or pride coming to the top. That I put my preference over people. Because what I have to do is when I'm feeling selfish and I have a preference of, oh, I wish this was that way or that was this way, I I have to put some weight behind it. So I can't just say it's a preference, it's what I desire.
What I do is I I tie that to myself. And so what you're doing, if you reject my preference for yours, is you're not rejecting my preference, you're rejecting me. Is that my timer to go off, Pete? That's okay. You could have just said, Shut it down.
I've been fine. There you go. But that's what we do. We tie preference to who I am as a person. So now what was a small thing in the life of a church, I have tied that to, you may be rejecting me, and if you reject me, I'm out of here, or I'm causing a fit.
Right? So that's what we see, especially when people get mad enough to leave. I have yet to have someone come to me and say, the reason I'm leaving is I'm selfish and you're not meeting my needs. Haven't had that happen yet. Maybe your elders have.
We'll we'll talk about that. I have had people that left the church I was at because of something I said. But they went to a church that practice exactly what I said, plus other things they didn't agree with but blamed me. Make it make sense. Because what I what this person does in this moment is elevate my position, and unless you meet me where I want to be met, I'm going to throw a fit or I may even leave.
And so we begin in a place where we are supposed to be full of servants, loving, caring for one another. We begin to fight and argue and scramble for this idea of power that makes no sense, because we've missed the point. And so what I want to ask you this morning church is, where are you in all of this? Where are you, and why you are here? Did you come this morning to just hopefully, we did all the things in the right way for you?
That the sermon was just long enough or too long. Jordan sang the right songs that we all agreed on the things we needed to agree on. Did you come here in a selfish attitude? Do you even care? As we go through this study, I pray that we will move from again, I want, I desire, this better happen or else to I will.
That I can work with my brothers and sisters. That I desire unity and peace, and to show the love of of Jesus to everyone. And because of that, I will be involved. I will help in any way I can. Understanding that sometimes I'm gonna have to sacrifice what I want.
Imagine that. Because that's what Jesus did. That is exactly what he showed us to to do. That is the life he lived. He did not say something and live another.
We shouldn't need it. So this morning, church, would you be that church that says, I will?