1 01:00:01,250 --> 01:00:02,000 Good morning. 2 01:00:03,958 --> 01:00:06,041 And welcome to morning cereal 3 01:00:12,083 --> 01:00:13,125 Okay, good morning 4 01:00:13,125 --> 01:00:14,250 and welcome to Thursday. 5 01:00:15,125 --> 01:00:17,041 I know I don't need to remind you that 6 01:00:17,041 --> 01:00:18,250 it's Valentine's Day 7 01:00:18,250 --> 01:00:20,333 Eve, so check your to-do 8 01:00:20,333 --> 01:00:20,583 lists. 9 01:00:20,916 --> 01:00:23,791 Your cards, chocolates, flowers, dinner 10 01:00:23,791 --> 01:00:26,083 reservations, jewelry, cars, 11 01:00:26,083 --> 01:00:27,666 however you do it, you have 12 01:00:27,666 --> 01:00:29,541 less than 24 hours to get it done. 13 01:00:30,333 --> 01:00:32,250 And if you're single this Valentine's 14 01:00:32,250 --> 01:00:33,250 Day, that's even better 15 01:00:33,250 --> 01:00:35,041 because today is National 16 01:00:35,041 --> 01:00:36,208 Self-Love Day. 17 01:00:36,583 --> 01:00:38,500 So if I were you, I would just take today 18 01:00:38,500 --> 01:00:39,916 and tomorrow, along with 19 01:00:39,916 --> 01:00:40,791 the rest of the weekend, 20 01:00:40,916 --> 01:00:43,083 and make it a four-day weekend to just 21 01:00:43,083 --> 01:00:44,750 really enjoy some me time. 22 01:00:45,666 --> 01:00:47,291 But if you are looking for that someone 23 01:00:47,291 --> 01:00:48,833 special, you also 24 01:00:48,833 --> 01:00:50,375 have less than 24 hours. 25 01:00:50,583 --> 01:00:52,083 No pressure, but good news. 26 01:00:52,708 --> 01:00:54,416 Today is also National 27 01:00:54,416 --> 01:00:57,041 Wingman Day, so call up your goose. 28 01:00:57,416 --> 01:00:58,750 And please tell me you all 29 01:00:58,750 --> 01:01:00,000 know that's a Top Gun reference. 30 01:01:00,666 --> 01:01:02,958 Anyways, call up your goose, find a 31 01:01:02,958 --> 01:01:04,958 piano, and sing your little hearts out. 32 01:01:05,541 --> 01:01:07,125 Okay, let's go ahead and jump into 33 01:01:07,125 --> 01:01:08,916 today's episode with today's quotes. 34 01:01:09,375 --> 01:01:11,041 One fun, nostalgic quote, and then a 35 01:01:11,041 --> 01:01:12,041 second quote to tease our 36 01:01:12,041 --> 01:01:13,000 book review later in the 37 01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:13,375 episode. 38 01:01:14,125 --> 01:01:15,541 Hopefully, one of these quotes will speak 39 01:01:15,541 --> 01:01:16,333 to you today and 40 01:01:16,333 --> 01:01:17,708 jumpstart your day in a positive 41 01:01:17,916 --> 01:01:18,250 direction. 42 01:01:19,208 --> 01:01:20,625 All right, the first quote is from the 43 01:01:20,625 --> 01:01:21,750 author of the Peanuts 44 01:01:21,750 --> 01:01:23,250 cartoons, Charles Schulz, 45 01:01:23,833 --> 01:01:26,583 and he said, "Friendship isn't about who 46 01:01:26,583 --> 01:01:27,791 you've known the longest. 47 01:01:28,333 --> 01:01:30,083 It's about the friend who comes and 48 01:01:30,083 --> 01:01:32,208 stands by your side in bad times." 49 01:01:33,333 --> 01:01:34,750 And these types of friends are hard to 50 01:01:34,750 --> 01:01:36,000 make, so hold on to them. 51 01:01:36,958 --> 01:01:38,541 And today's teaser quote from the book 52 01:01:38,541 --> 01:01:41,666 review is, "Few people are logical. 53 01:01:42,333 --> 01:01:44,666 Most of us are prejudiced and biased." 54 01:01:45,375 --> 01:01:47,083 And as usual, we'll go ahead and unpack 55 01:01:47,083 --> 01:01:48,000 that here in just a few 56 01:01:48,000 --> 01:01:49,000 minutes in the book review 57 01:01:49,083 --> 01:01:51,041 segment, but first, let's jump into our 58 01:01:51,041 --> 01:01:52,416 usual dose of fun and 59 01:01:52,416 --> 01:01:53,708 historic facts from this day 60 01:01:53,708 --> 01:01:54,250 in history. 61 01:01:55,166 --> 01:01:56,875 Today's news facts and birthdays are for 62 01:01:56,875 --> 01:01:58,875 February 13th, and there's 63 01:01:58,875 --> 01:01:59,916 a lot of interesting news 64 01:01:59,916 --> 01:02:01,583 facts for this day, so hang in there with 65 01:02:01,583 --> 01:02:02,208 me, but we're going to 66 01:02:02,208 --> 01:02:03,458 start all the way back 67 01:02:03,458 --> 01:02:04,833 in 1633. 68 01:02:05,625 --> 01:02:08,000 That's when Galileo arrived in Rome to 69 01:02:08,000 --> 01:02:10,458 face charges of heresy for 70 01:02:10,458 --> 01:02:12,166 advocating the Copernican 71 01:02:12,208 --> 01:02:14,916 theory, and that theory holds that the 72 01:02:14,916 --> 01:02:16,875 earth revolves around the sun. 73 01:02:17,541 --> 01:02:18,916 It's witchcraft, I tell you. 74 01:02:19,958 --> 01:02:23,333 And then in 1866, Jesse James, he held up 75 01:02:23,333 --> 01:02:27,000 his first bank, stealing $15,000 from the 76 01:02:27,000 --> 01:02:27,875 Clay County Savings 77 01:02:27,875 --> 01:02:30,083 Association in Liberty, Missouri. 78 01:02:31,208 --> 01:02:34,041 And in 1891, American artist Grant Wood, 79 01:02:34,041 --> 01:02:36,083 he was born near Anamosa, Iowa. 80 01:02:36,291 --> 01:02:38,666 You would know his most famous piece of 81 01:02:38,666 --> 01:02:40,083 the farmer and his wife 82 01:02:40,083 --> 01:02:41,083 standing in front of their 83 01:02:41,083 --> 01:02:42,333 home with pitchforks 84 01:02:42,333 --> 01:02:45,083 and not a smile to be had. 85 01:02:45,375 --> 01:02:46,791 If you're watching on YouTube, you can 86 01:02:46,791 --> 01:02:48,291 see it right here over my right shoulder. 87 01:02:48,625 --> 01:02:51,458 But I've got a buddy that's from Iowa. 88 01:02:51,791 --> 01:02:54,125 My wife went to school in Iowa, and I've 89 01:02:54,125 --> 01:02:55,708 got some in-laws that live there as well. 90 01:02:56,166 --> 01:02:58,625 And I can confirm that they do smile in 91 01:02:58,625 --> 01:02:59,958 Iowa, but it usually has 92 01:02:59,958 --> 01:03:00,791 to do with the Hawkeyes 93 01:03:01,083 --> 01:03:01,291 mining. 94 01:03:02,333 --> 01:03:05,583 Then, in 1945, Allied planes began 95 01:03:05,583 --> 01:03:06,833 bombing the German city 96 01:03:06,833 --> 01:03:08,583 of Dresden, resulting in a 97 01:03:08,583 --> 01:03:09,791 devastating firestorm 98 01:03:09,791 --> 01:03:10,916 that destroyed the city. 99 01:03:11,791 --> 01:03:14,333 Then in 1960, France detonated its first 100 01:03:14,333 --> 01:03:15,375 atomic bomb in the 101 01:03:15,375 --> 01:03:16,875 French-Algerian Sahara Desert, 102 01:03:17,375 --> 01:03:19,291 becoming the fourth nuclear nation. 103 01:03:20,208 --> 01:03:21,791 Then skipping all the way up to 1996, 104 01:03:22,166 --> 01:03:22,958 that's when Death Row 105 01:03:22,958 --> 01:03:24,541 Records, they released rapper 106 01:03:24,541 --> 01:03:27,458 Tupac Shakur's fourth studio album, All 107 01:03:27,458 --> 01:03:29,166 Eyes on Me, and it was 108 01:03:29,166 --> 01:03:30,416 to be his final release 109 01:03:30,458 --> 01:03:31,333 during his lifetime. 110 01:03:32,541 --> 01:03:35,500 Then in 1997, the Dow Jones Industrial 111 01:03:35,500 --> 01:03:38,208 Average first eclipsed the 7000 mark. 112 01:03:38,625 --> 01:03:40,250 It closed at 7,022. 113 01:03:41,291 --> 01:03:43,000 And at the time of this recording, the 114 01:03:43,000 --> 01:03:44,791 Dow was at over 44,000. 115 01:03:45,625 --> 01:03:47,708 Then in 1998, you might remember the 116 01:03:47,708 --> 01:03:49,166 Austrian downhill skier 117 01:03:49,166 --> 01:03:50,916 Herman Maisers crash at the 118 01:03:50,916 --> 01:03:53,166 Olympics when he flew 30 feet in the air. 119 01:03:53,416 --> 01:03:55,583 Then he smashed through two fences at 120 01:03:55,583 --> 01:03:57,166 approximately 80 miles an hour. 121 01:03:57,666 --> 01:03:58,666 Luckily he walked away 122 01:03:58,666 --> 01:04:00,208 and he won gold days later. 123 01:04:00,958 --> 01:04:03,083 Then in 2000, that's when the last 124 01:04:03,083 --> 01:04:04,333 Peanuts comic strip was 125 01:04:04,333 --> 01:04:05,375 published in newspapers. 126 01:04:05,916 --> 01:04:07,500 It was just hours after the death of the 127 01:04:07,500 --> 01:04:08,500 creator Charles Schulz. 128 01:04:09,833 --> 01:04:12,625 Then in 2004, the universe's largest 129 01:04:12,625 --> 01:04:14,541 known diamond is discovered. 130 01:04:14,541 --> 01:04:17,291 It's called BPM 37093. 131 01:04:17,833 --> 01:04:20,708 And it's a white dwarf star about 50 132 01:04:20,708 --> 01:04:21,958 light years from Earth, 133 01:04:21,958 --> 01:04:23,375 so not enough time to get 134 01:04:23,375 --> 01:04:24,583 it for Valentine's Day. 135 01:04:25,250 --> 01:04:27,583 The star was nicknamed Lucy after the 136 01:04:27,583 --> 01:04:28,625 Beatles song Lucy in 137 01:04:28,625 --> 01:04:30,250 the Sky with Diamonds. 138 01:04:30,625 --> 01:04:32,833 And there's a lot of science around this, 139 01:04:32,833 --> 01:04:35,416 but as a white dwarf star starts to cool, 140 01:04:35,875 --> 01:04:37,208 they begin to crystallize. 141 01:04:37,208 --> 01:04:39,833 And scientists believe that about 90% of 142 01:04:39,833 --> 01:04:41,166 Lucy's mass has 143 01:04:41,166 --> 01:04:42,708 crystallized into diamond. 144 01:04:43,375 --> 01:04:46,750 That diamond has a radius of 2,500 miles 145 01:04:46,750 --> 01:04:49,791 or 5,000 miles side to side. 146 01:04:50,416 --> 01:04:50,916 All right. 147 01:04:51,291 --> 01:04:52,291 Well, happy birthday of 148 01:04:52,291 --> 01:04:53,166 today's your birthday. 149 01:04:53,291 --> 01:04:54,333 You share a birthday with 150 01:04:54,333 --> 01:04:55,750 football player Randy Moss. 151 01:04:55,958 --> 01:04:56,583 He's 48. 152 01:04:57,333 --> 01:04:59,083 British singer Robbie Williams. 153 01:04:59,083 --> 01:04:59,791 He's 51. 154 01:05:00,666 --> 01:05:01,791 And singer Peter Gabriel. 155 01:05:02,125 --> 01:05:03,000 He's 75. 156 01:05:04,125 --> 01:05:05,583 And the number one song on this date in 157 01:05:05,583 --> 01:05:07,500 1981 was Celebration 158 01:05:07,500 --> 01:05:08,666 by Cool and the Gang. 159 01:05:09,541 --> 01:05:09,750 Okay. 160 01:05:10,333 --> 01:05:11,916 Although I always enjoy and love 161 01:05:11,916 --> 01:05:13,208 highlighting the songs from 162 01:05:13,208 --> 01:05:15,416 the 80s and 90s, some of them 163 01:05:15,416 --> 01:05:16,541 have a very personal 164 01:05:16,541 --> 01:05:18,583 story attached to them for me. 165 01:05:18,916 --> 01:05:20,041 And this is one of them. 166 01:05:20,250 --> 01:05:22,500 I've loved music from a very young age 167 01:05:22,500 --> 01:05:24,250 and my mom made me my 168 01:05:24,250 --> 01:05:25,750 very first mixtape when 169 01:05:25,750 --> 01:05:27,125 I was three or four years old. 170 01:05:27,958 --> 01:05:30,166 And that tape only had two songs on it. 171 01:05:30,500 --> 01:05:32,416 There's one on each side to make it 172 01:05:32,416 --> 01:05:34,666 easier for me to work the tape. 173 01:05:35,333 --> 01:05:37,041 And one of those songs was 174 01:05:37,041 --> 01:05:39,083 Celebration by Cool and the Gang. 175 01:05:39,583 --> 01:05:42,375 So this song goes back to my very first 176 01:05:42,375 --> 01:05:44,208 memories and I still have the tape. 177 01:05:44,875 --> 01:05:47,416 It was also the song to open up the 178 01:05:47,416 --> 01:05:48,583 dancing at my wife and 179 01:05:48,583 --> 01:05:49,333 I's wedding reception. 180 01:05:49,791 --> 01:05:51,250 So this is a special song 181 01:05:51,250 --> 01:05:52,583 with happy memories for me. 182 01:05:53,291 --> 01:05:55,833 And in 2016, the song Celebration was 183 01:05:55,833 --> 01:05:57,750 inducted into the Grammy Hall of Fame. 184 01:05:58,958 --> 01:06:00,875 Well, the number one movie on this date 185 01:06:00,875 --> 01:06:04,208 back in 1993 was Groundhog Day. 186 01:06:04,708 --> 01:06:05,250 Remember this movie? 187 01:06:05,916 --> 01:06:06,666 You remember this movie? 188 01:06:07,250 --> 01:06:08,125 Do you remember this movie? 189 01:06:09,208 --> 01:06:11,166 This movie starred Bill Murray and it's 190 01:06:11,166 --> 01:06:12,208 about a weatherman that 191 01:06:12,208 --> 01:06:14,333 relives the same day over 192 01:06:14,333 --> 01:06:14,916 and over again. 193 01:06:15,708 --> 01:06:17,500 And apparently the first choice to play 194 01:06:17,500 --> 01:06:19,291 the lead role was for Tom Hanks. 195 01:06:19,875 --> 01:06:21,916 But Hanks turned it down and then Michael 196 01:06:21,916 --> 01:06:23,333 Keaton turned it down as well. 197 01:06:24,000 --> 01:06:25,791 Finally Bill Murray received the role and 198 01:06:25,791 --> 01:06:26,875 he also received 199 01:06:26,875 --> 01:06:28,875 rabies shots because he was 200 01:06:28,916 --> 01:06:30,291 twice bitten by the 201 01:06:30,291 --> 01:06:31,583 Groundhog during the filming. 202 01:06:32,333 --> 01:06:33,791 It was not yet confirmed 203 01:06:33,791 --> 01:06:35,208 if he was twice shy though. 204 01:06:35,916 --> 01:06:36,458 It's a thinker. 205 01:06:37,041 --> 01:06:38,583 And while you're thinking about that, 206 01:06:38,583 --> 01:06:39,500 let's move on to some 207 01:06:39,500 --> 01:06:41,250 personal growth in the book 208 01:06:41,250 --> 01:06:42,875 review segment of Morning Serial. 209 01:06:43,833 --> 01:06:45,458 This is where we take a few moments to 210 01:06:45,458 --> 01:06:46,500 reflect on the lessons 211 01:06:46,500 --> 01:06:47,750 learned from the current book 212 01:06:47,750 --> 01:06:48,250 we're reading. 213 01:06:48,875 --> 01:06:50,375 And currently we're reading through Dale 214 01:06:50,375 --> 01:06:51,416 Carnegie's How to Win 215 01:06:51,416 --> 01:06:52,708 Friends and Influence People. 216 01:06:53,291 --> 01:06:55,166 It's a timeless book that is consistently 217 01:06:55,166 --> 01:06:56,333 on all the must read 218 01:06:56,333 --> 01:06:57,458 lists and it's packed 219 01:06:57,458 --> 01:07:00,208 with rock solid advice and actions for 220 01:07:00,208 --> 01:07:01,375 all of us to use and 221 01:07:01,375 --> 01:07:02,375 build healthy foundational 222 01:07:02,500 --> 01:07:03,625 concepts to live by. 223 01:07:04,750 --> 01:07:06,666 Yesterday, we began chapter two entitled 224 01:07:06,666 --> 01:07:08,041 Assure Way of Making 225 01:07:08,041 --> 01:07:09,708 Enemies and How to Avoid It. 226 01:07:10,375 --> 01:07:12,291 But Carnegie started this chapter by 227 01:07:12,291 --> 01:07:14,541 admitting we can all be wrong at times. 228 01:07:15,083 --> 01:07:16,125 But sometimes we are 229 01:07:16,125 --> 01:07:17,416 right and we know it. 230 01:07:18,083 --> 01:07:19,250 And the art in the 231 01:07:19,250 --> 01:07:21,500 conversation is how we go about it. 232 01:07:21,833 --> 01:07:23,291 And Carnegie began this chapter by 233 01:07:23,291 --> 01:07:24,916 telling us that we won't make much 234 01:07:24,916 --> 01:07:26,125 progress with people 235 01:07:26,125 --> 01:07:27,833 if we approach a conversation telling 236 01:07:27,833 --> 01:07:28,750 them we are going to 237 01:07:28,750 --> 01:07:30,250 prove them wrong or change 238 01:07:30,250 --> 01:07:30,833 their mind. 239 01:07:31,583 --> 01:07:33,583 Instead, we should disarm them by telling 240 01:07:33,583 --> 01:07:34,750 them perhaps we could 241 01:07:34,750 --> 01:07:36,041 be wrong, as we often 242 01:07:36,166 --> 01:07:38,500 can be, and that we should examine the 243 01:07:38,500 --> 01:07:39,708 facts, make ourselves 244 01:07:39,708 --> 01:07:41,458 open to where the facts take 245 01:07:41,583 --> 01:07:44,083 us, and generally that will open the 246 01:07:44,083 --> 01:07:45,416 other person up to the same. 247 01:07:46,291 --> 01:07:48,041 Carnegie understands that we will come 248 01:07:48,041 --> 01:07:49,333 across situations where 249 01:07:49,333 --> 01:07:50,666 we just plain old know that 250 01:07:50,666 --> 01:07:51,416 we are right. 251 01:07:51,416 --> 01:07:52,916 There's just no question about it. 252 01:07:53,458 --> 01:07:55,875 And Carnegie tells a story to illustrate 253 01:07:55,875 --> 01:07:56,833 what can happen if we 254 01:07:56,833 --> 01:07:58,083 just bluntly tell the other 255 01:07:58,083 --> 01:07:59,000 person as such. 256 01:08:00,000 --> 01:08:02,375 In this story, a lawyer is presenting his 257 01:08:02,375 --> 01:08:03,333 what is clearly an 258 01:08:03,333 --> 01:08:04,666 important case before the 259 01:08:04,666 --> 01:08:06,625 United States Supreme Court. 260 01:08:07,500 --> 01:08:09,333 And the case was actually Lusgarten 261 01:08:09,333 --> 01:08:11,000 versus Fleet Corporation. 262 01:08:11,875 --> 01:08:13,708 And it obviously involved an important 263 01:08:13,708 --> 01:08:15,000 question of law as well 264 01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:16,208 as a large sum of money. 265 01:08:17,083 --> 01:08:19,291 Well, one of the judges asked the lawyer 266 01:08:19,291 --> 01:08:20,541 a question that may 267 01:08:20,541 --> 01:08:22,041 have been rhetorical, but 268 01:08:22,375 --> 01:08:24,250 he asked how long the statute of 269 01:08:24,250 --> 01:08:25,166 limitations was 270 01:08:25,166 --> 01:08:27,541 questioning, quote, six years. 271 01:08:27,791 --> 01:08:28,333 Is it not? 272 01:08:28,541 --> 01:08:28,833 End quote. 273 01:08:29,708 --> 01:08:30,875 And the lawyer stopped 274 01:08:30,875 --> 01:08:32,333 and stared at the justice. 275 01:08:32,666 --> 01:08:34,750 And he just replied, quote, Your Honor, 276 01:08:35,083 --> 01:08:36,416 there is not a statute of 277 01:08:36,416 --> 01:08:37,958 limitations in admiralty, 278 01:08:38,333 --> 01:08:38,625 end quote. 279 01:08:39,625 --> 01:08:41,750 As the lawyer told his story to one of 280 01:08:41,750 --> 01:08:43,791 Carnegie's classes, he recalled the 281 01:08:43,791 --> 01:08:45,416 courtroom fell silent 282 01:08:45,916 --> 01:08:46,541 and it felt like the 283 01:08:46,541 --> 01:08:47,916 temperature fell to zero. 284 01:08:48,708 --> 01:08:50,583 And even though the lawyer was correct, 285 01:08:51,041 --> 01:08:52,291 the law was on his side 286 01:08:52,291 --> 01:08:54,083 and he spoke better than 287 01:08:54,083 --> 01:08:55,708 he had ever spoken before. 288 01:08:56,208 --> 01:08:58,750 He made the mistake of publicly telling a 289 01:08:58,750 --> 01:09:01,416 very famous and intelligent judge that he 290 01:09:01,458 --> 01:09:04,041 was wrong and therefore his argument 291 01:09:04,041 --> 01:09:05,125 ended up not being 292 01:09:05,125 --> 01:09:06,916 persuasive and he lost the case. 293 01:09:08,083 --> 01:09:10,500 Carnegie reminds the reader here that we 294 01:09:10,500 --> 01:09:12,208 humans can be a flawed bunch. 295 01:09:12,833 --> 01:09:15,333 He says, quote, Few people are logical. 296 01:09:15,875 --> 01:09:17,791 Most of us are prejudiced and biased. 297 01:09:18,625 --> 01:09:20,666 Most of us are blighted with preconceived 298 01:09:20,666 --> 01:09:22,041 notions with jealousy, 299 01:09:22,333 --> 01:09:24,458 suspicion, fear, envy 300 01:09:24,458 --> 01:09:25,916 and pride, end quote. 301 01:09:26,708 --> 01:09:28,791 And because of this, most of us don't 302 01:09:28,791 --> 01:09:30,000 want to change our minds 303 01:09:30,000 --> 01:09:31,416 about anything from religion 304 01:09:31,541 --> 01:09:33,916 to our haircuts to our favorite actors. 305 01:09:35,083 --> 01:09:36,625 Carnegie is making the point that we are 306 01:09:36,625 --> 01:09:38,375 often stubborn, making 307 01:09:38,375 --> 01:09:39,833 changing other people's minds 308 01:09:40,041 --> 01:09:40,833 very difficult. 309 01:09:41,833 --> 01:09:42,375 And that is no 310 01:09:42,375 --> 01:09:43,750 different in today's world. 311 01:09:43,750 --> 01:09:45,291 And it might actually prove even more 312 01:09:45,291 --> 01:09:46,750 difficult today based on the 313 01:09:46,750 --> 01:09:48,208 current sociological norms. 314 01:09:48,875 --> 01:09:51,166 But if you insist on changing people's 315 01:09:51,166 --> 01:09:52,583 minds, Carnegie suggests 316 01:09:52,583 --> 01:09:53,875 you read this paragraph 317 01:09:54,000 --> 01:09:55,333 every morning before breakfast. 318 01:09:56,166 --> 01:09:57,666 It's an excerpt from James Harvey 319 01:09:57,666 --> 01:09:59,958 Robinson's book, The Mind in the Making. 320 01:10:00,416 --> 01:10:00,916 Here's the excerpt. 321 01:10:02,041 --> 01:10:04,458 We sometimes find ourselves changing our 322 01:10:04,458 --> 01:10:05,458 minds without any 323 01:10:05,458 --> 01:10:07,291 resistance or heavy emotion. 324 01:10:07,875 --> 01:10:10,250 But if we are told we are wrong, we 325 01:10:10,250 --> 01:10:11,583 resent the imputation 326 01:10:11,583 --> 01:10:13,000 and harden our hearts. 327 01:10:13,833 --> 01:10:16,083 We are incredibly heedless in the 328 01:10:16,083 --> 01:10:17,333 formation of our beliefs, 329 01:10:17,916 --> 01:10:19,458 but find ourselves filled 330 01:10:19,458 --> 01:10:22,041 with an illicit passion for them when 331 01:10:22,041 --> 01:10:23,833 anyone proposes to rob 332 01:10:23,833 --> 01:10:25,250 us of their companionship. 333 01:10:26,083 --> 01:10:28,500 It is obviously not the ideas themselves 334 01:10:28,500 --> 01:10:29,791 that are dear to us, 335 01:10:30,041 --> 01:10:31,458 but our self-esteem which 336 01:10:31,458 --> 01:10:32,791 is threatened, end quote. 337 01:10:33,583 --> 01:10:35,583 And this excerpt goes on to talk about 338 01:10:35,583 --> 01:10:36,375 how important 339 01:10:36,375 --> 01:10:38,166 something to which we associate 340 01:10:38,291 --> 01:10:42,791 as ours is to us, like my house, my 341 01:10:42,791 --> 01:10:44,250 dinner, my family, my 342 01:10:44,250 --> 01:10:46,416 country, my God, my way of thinking, 343 01:10:47,250 --> 01:10:48,000 and my beliefs. 344 01:10:48,875 --> 01:10:51,125 And Robinson says that if anyone so much 345 01:10:51,125 --> 01:10:51,958 has questioned 346 01:10:51,958 --> 01:10:53,750 something that we hold so dear, 347 01:10:54,541 --> 01:10:56,833 that we quote, "seek every manner of 348 01:10:56,833 --> 01:10:58,166 excuse for clinging to 349 01:10:58,166 --> 01:11:00,375 it, and that our so-called 350 01:11:00,458 --> 01:11:02,916 reasoning consists of finding arguments 351 01:11:02,916 --> 01:11:04,291 for going on believing 352 01:11:04,291 --> 01:11:06,083 as we already do," end 353 01:11:06,083 --> 01:11:06,333 quote. 354 01:11:07,458 --> 01:11:09,333 Carnegie immediately follows this with 355 01:11:09,333 --> 01:11:10,583 another passage from 356 01:11:10,583 --> 01:11:12,625 psychologist Carl Rogers' book 357 01:11:12,958 --> 01:11:16,000 on becoming a person, quoting, "I have 358 01:11:16,000 --> 01:11:17,250 found it of enormous 359 01:11:17,250 --> 01:11:19,375 value when I can permit myself 360 01:11:19,375 --> 01:11:20,541 to understand the 361 01:11:20,541 --> 01:11:22,333 other person," end quote. 362 01:11:23,416 --> 01:11:26,083 Rogers asks the question, quote, "Is it 363 01:11:26,083 --> 01:11:27,458 necessary to permit 364 01:11:27,458 --> 01:11:29,583 oneself to understand another? 365 01:11:30,333 --> 01:11:31,125 I think it is. 366 01:11:31,666 --> 01:11:34,000 Our first reaction to most of the 367 01:11:34,000 --> 01:11:35,666 statements which we hear from other 368 01:11:35,666 --> 01:11:38,125 people is an evaluation 369 01:11:38,583 --> 01:11:40,208 or a judgment rather 370 01:11:40,208 --> 01:11:42,291 than understanding of it. 371 01:11:42,750 --> 01:11:45,250 When someone expresses some feeling, 372 01:11:46,000 --> 01:11:47,625 attitude, or belief, our 373 01:11:47,625 --> 01:11:49,375 tendency is almost immediately 374 01:11:49,666 --> 01:11:53,083 to feel, that's right, or that's stupid, 375 01:11:53,916 --> 01:11:54,666 that's abnormal, 376 01:11:55,000 --> 01:11:56,833 that's unreasonable, that's 377 01:11:56,833 --> 01:11:58,791 incorrect, that's not nice. 378 01:12:00,041 --> 01:12:02,208 Very rarely do we permit ourselves to 379 01:12:02,208 --> 01:12:04,083 understand precisely what 380 01:12:04,083 --> 01:12:05,375 the meaning of the statement 381 01:12:05,541 --> 01:12:07,958 is to the other person," end quote. 382 01:12:08,916 --> 01:12:09,875 There's a lot to digest 383 01:12:09,875 --> 01:12:11,250 in these last two passages. 384 01:12:11,875 --> 01:12:13,958 What we are learning though is that it's 385 01:12:13,958 --> 01:12:15,083 difficult to change 386 01:12:15,083 --> 01:12:17,458 someone's way of thinking and their 387 01:12:17,750 --> 01:12:17,791 beliefs. 388 01:12:18,750 --> 01:12:21,291 They are deeply held and associated with 389 01:12:21,291 --> 01:12:22,708 their self-esteem and as 390 01:12:22,708 --> 01:12:23,958 such, people will cling 391 01:12:23,958 --> 01:12:26,083 to them, even unreasonably. 392 01:12:26,791 --> 01:12:29,208 So we need to artfully approach these 393 01:12:29,208 --> 01:12:30,958 conversations and looking to 394 01:12:30,958 --> 01:12:33,041 disarm and with perspective 395 01:12:33,166 --> 01:12:34,041 of the other person. 396 01:12:35,166 --> 01:12:37,833 Okay, well, another heavy one today, but 397 01:12:37,833 --> 01:12:39,416 join us again tomorrow as 398 01:12:39,416 --> 01:12:40,708 we near the end of chapter 399 01:12:41,000 --> 01:12:43,166 two and we hear some classic Carnegie 400 01:12:43,166 --> 01:12:44,708 stories about overpriced 401 01:12:44,708 --> 01:12:46,333 curtains and we get some 402 01:12:46,375 --> 01:12:47,625 more advice from Benjamin 403 01:12:47,625 --> 01:12:48,916 Franklin's autobiography. 404 01:12:49,916 --> 01:12:50,625 Take a deep breath. 405 01:12:50,958 --> 01:12:52,291 It's going to be a great day today. 406 01:12:52,833 --> 01:12:53,750 Go out there and meet 407 01:12:53,750 --> 01:12:55,083 the obstacles head on. 408 01:12:55,583 --> 01:12:56,625 Thanks for joining us today. 409 01:12:57,083 --> 01:12:57,750 We'll see you back here 410 01:12:57,750 --> 01:12:59,708 tomorrow and have a fantastic day. 411 01:13:02,166 --> 01:13:03,916 Don't forget to follow and subscribe to 412 01:13:03,916 --> 01:13:04,541 the Morning Serial 413 01:13:04,541 --> 01:13:06,166 podcast on the One Life 414 01:13:06,333 --> 01:13:07,166 Live It channel. 415 01:13:07,708 --> 01:13:09,625 You can find more episodes and videos by 416 01:13:09,625 --> 01:13:11,291 visiting our YouTube channel and the 417 01:13:11,291 --> 01:13:12,916 website at Shawningless 418 01:13:13,250 --> 01:13:15,416 and at Shawningless.com, where you can 419 01:13:15,416 --> 01:13:16,750 also follow our other 420 01:13:16,750 --> 01:13:18,291 podcast, the Mr. and Mrs. 421 01:13:18,291 --> 01:13:19,458 Inglis podcast and the 422 01:13:19,458 --> 01:13:20,458 Life Happens podcast. 423 01:13:21,291 --> 01:13:22,958 In these other podcasts, we'll dive 424 01:13:22,958 --> 01:13:24,333 deeper into everyday issues, 425 01:13:24,625 --> 01:13:25,375 self-improvement and 426 01:13:25,375 --> 01:13:27,875 well-being, business and finance, and we 427 01:13:27,875 --> 01:13:29,125 welcome special guests too. 428 01:13:29,625 --> 01:13:30,375 So join us. 429 01:13:30,375 --> 01:13:31,708 It'll be a good time, I promise. 430 01:13:32,416 --> 01:13:33,291 Thanks again for listening. 431 01:13:33,500 --> 01:13:35,041 Have a fantastic day and 432 01:13:35,041 --> 01:13:35,666 we'll see you tomorrow.