Lindsay: Welcome to the Lifting Lindsay podcast.
I'm really excited for today's episode.
I am here with Emilee Roberts.
We just met on Instagram, didn't we?
I feel like I meet the best people on, on social media.
Emilee Roberts: That's where I find the best too sometimes.
Lindsay: So that works that way.
That's awesome.
Well, it's interesting because you've been using my training
app, and then I think that that's how I found you is you had shared
something about using my training app.
So I clicked on you and started looking through, and I just, loved
what you stood for, what you were sharing, your positive attitude.
I hate using the term before and after because I feel
like that's not how it works.
It's just like you made a transition and we're still learning and growing.
There's no before and after in my mind, but I did see yours and
I was just so, so, so impressed.
So I want you to just kind introduce yourself, tell us a little bit
about you and what your count is all about and what you are all about.
Emilee Roberts: Okay.
Well,
I, I have been using your app and your, your training programs for
probably about six months now, but before that, I couldn't get enough of
your podcast, your Instagram content.
I just felt like a sponge soaking everything in that you were sharing.
I finally just was like, why am I not training with her too?
So I made that transition and I loved it.
I've always just felt very, connected to what you share on mindset, what you share
on, I mean, whether you try to or not.
I think that you talk a lot about confidence, which is kind of what
we're gonna talk about today.
I've been married for nearly 13 years.
I have four kids.
Oldest is 10, youngest is three, and he is, so three.
Um, I have two redheads and for some reason the world
thinks that's interesting.
Lindsay: But it's interesting you have fiery redheads in your blood.
I love it.
Yeah.
Emilee Roberts: My oldest and my youngest, I've got two little redheaded bookends.
I live in a small town in like a farming rural community in southern Utah.
I've worked in like the online kind of beauty space for like eight and a half,
nine years, and that's kind of had to make me learn or relearn a little bit of where
I really believe confidence comes from.
And that's just kind of pushed zone and that comfort zone is always changing and
has be changed in order for me to kind of.
feel like I'm still growing as a person and it's ultimately I feel like been
the thing that's urged me forward into a kind of this path of self discovery
where I was, I'm still on, like you said, like not this before and after thing.
It's just this constant transition of, of learning and growing and personal
development and self-awareness and um, and hopefully somewhere along there there's
a little sprinkled self-confidence.
Lindsay: Well, you, you said something interesting.
You said you had to relearn what confidence was.
Speak a little bit to that.
Emilee Roberts: I think that we correlate self-confidence as this,
maybe like this one time grand event.
That something happens and then I am confident I hit this
goal and then I am confident.
Um, but really what I've learned is that it's like this ever evolving and ever
growing and this constant cycle of, of looking for it and feeling it and um, and
searching for it and feeling it again.
And maybe it comes to us in different ways, but it's never,
it's never from a result.
It's more from this process of becoming this process, of trying this process that
includes grit, failure, tweaking, goal setting, planning, like all these things.
But it's, it's not like this end result.
It's not like this like huge climax where, oh, I did it today.
Lindsay: You made it
Emilee Roberts: relearn.
But I of, oh.
It's, it'll happen when, and
that's the lie.
Lindsay: That is so good.
That is a huge lie.
And I think that that's, you're, you're so right.
People are waiting for the summit and they're waiting for that, that
peak moment where, and, and people will often describe individuals as
just, that's their state of being.
They're confident.
And I know that sometimes people say that.
to me, I know I'm, I know I'm interviewing you, but I just wanna share a little
story about my whole life people have been like, well, you're just confident.
I'm like, you have no idea the storm that like rages inside of me
and the amount of like self-doubt,
I actually fight.
And so when I started my podcast like a few years ago, it was the
scariest thing in the world to me.
And I knew I wanted to do it, but I was so scared and I kept putting it
off, putting it off, putting it off.
And every single time I would go to record, I was so consumed with this like
fear of this is just another avenue, Lindsay, for people to pick you apart.
Are you, are you sure you wanna do this?
And I had to really dive deep into myself and I still don't know.
Well, I had an experience that actually your religious person is, so I we're
spiritual people, but I had an experience where I just prayed about it and
God was just like, just record one.
Just do one.
And then after I was done with that, I'm like, okay, that wasn't so bad.
And he is now do two.
Now just do two.
Like that's it.
Just, it's one step at a time.
Emilee Roberts: I love that.
Lindsay: Well, I love what you shared that it's, it is this process.
So let's dive into this process.
'cause I do think some people do innately, it's like, I mean, you have four children.
You can probably see this with your own children, that there are some
that come into this world who are a little more sure of themselves, who
are a little, maybe, let's put it this way, they're a little more, okay.
Failing.
It doesn't label them as a failure.
They're okay failing, and some of my kids come in like that, and some
of 'em, I have to teach them to dive deep and be okay with failure.
What is this process that you said that you have to keep doing and over
and over again and, and then you get a little bit more confidence and a
little bit more, and a little bit more?
What does that look like?
Grand scheme and also day to day for individuals?
Emilee Roberts: Well, I feel like for me, I am most confident when I am growing.
I don't wanna make that sound like it has to happen at a certain pace or a
certain speed, because there's times in my life when, when it feels faster, and
then just probably much, many more times in my life where it feels a lot slower.
Um, but.
When I'm trying, when I'm doing something that is, is helping me
grow, and it doesn't, for all of us.
It looks different.
It's, it can be in different avenues of growth, but when I'm doing something
that I'm trying to grow and to progress and to become more, I, I get
these little glimmers of confidence and, and along like the spiritual
and the religious side of things.
You know, sometimes I'll have a little voice that whispers,
Hey, that, that was a good move.
You could do that again.
Or you're on the right path.
Or maybe, maybe something that lets me know.
That isn't worth your focus, that's not worth your time.
When I'm consistently striving for some growth, knowing that I am not perfect
and I never will be, that's okay.
Kind of having also that acceptance of, of that fact, I
wasn't put here to be perfect.
No one expects me to be perfect, just like I don't expect the
people around me to be perfect.
So that's gotta be okay.
I've kind of gotta like, get that weight off my shoulder knowing
that that's just my simple truth.
And when you accept that, I think that it allows you some freedoms to
do what you had just said and to be okay with failing, not necessarily
that doesn't make me a failure, but to be okay with, with failing.
And while knowing that I'm imperfect and that it's okay to be imperfect, it's okay
to at the same time, know that I am okay to strive for more, to want for more, and
to push for more, in, in whatever aspect or whatever avenue that you're looking at.
So I've been reading this book re like just, I just barely got it last week.
it just released and, and I, I actually pre-ordered it in July.
last year, in this book it's by Jamie Kern Lima.
It's called Worthy.
And it is, it couldn't, I couldn't have opened it at a better time than
right before we did this, but it's going through a lot of the differences,
between what self-confidence is and what your self worth.
And the thing that I've loved about reading this book is she's not even
meaning to, but it so perfectly aligns with my faith and my spiritual
connection to my father in heaven.
And it, it just completely has a light.
Like what she is saying is, like depicting what I believe?
She's not necessarily trying to do that, but, but that is what she's doing.
And so she, she's forming a line to differentiate between
self-worth and self-confidence.
And one of the things I read from her book just, um, sometime last week was
the people who succeed the most are often the same people who fail the most
because they're the ones who try the most.
And as a mom, you kind of, you kind of, um, talked about like
watching your kids grow differently and, react to things naturally
differently than, than the others.
As a mom, the thing that I would hope that I can teach my kids is to try the most.
You don't have to win the most, you don't have to be first place the most.
You don't have to be the very best or like the, the star of the show the most.
But if you will try.
I think you're gonna find joy the most and contentment the most and that, I feel like
is where they're gonna find confidence
the most.
Lindsay: I love that.
That is so powerful.
I feel like kind of going back to
the conversation at the beginning where we think it's this end
result, but it's actually through the process of development.
And I think though that that's what you were saying too, it's this process of
try fail or maybe not fail, but then again, what is, what is failure really?
What is failure?
If you think about it, it's.
To me, I don't know if you have a definition in your mind, but to me it's,
it really is not trying and no growth.
It's that that damning of no growth in my mind, that is really failure.
And so teaching our children to be able to try, try, try, push
onto the, into the uncomfortable, but then loving ourselves enough.
To push, push, push into that, uncomfortable, into that one.
But it's not failure.
It's not possible failure because failure's just not growing.
Mm-Hmm.
That's, that's what failure is.
Yeah.
So that's really powerful.
I love what you just barely shared.
And that quote, what was the book again?
It's called
Emilee Roberts: Worthy Jamie Kerm Lima.
Okay.
It's her second book.
It's wonderful.
Lindsay: That's, that's awesome.
I'll probably
Emilee Roberts: reference it a
few times too.
Lindsay: No, no, no.
I, I just really love that.
So I feel like the hardest thing for most people is you had the cutest
reel on Instagram that showed, I'll be confident when I lose five pounds.
Right.
A lot of times people will attach, you know, the confidence to that,
like we said, that end result.
Yes.
Um, I, what are some other ways that women feel I'll be confident when, yes, you can
fill in the blank with almost anything.
Emilee Roberts: I think, you know, people attach that to money.
I'll be confident when I have a certain amount of money
when I get into that house.
When I drive that car, when I am in a certain pants size, when I
hit a promotion, when I, you know, reach a certain level of success,
I, I think that we attach those strings to I will be confident
when, and that is, that is the lie.
So I'm gonna go back to that book Worthy.
It talks about how, and, and just teaches how.
You do not have to earn your self-worth that was gifted to us when we were
designed, when we were put here.
Our self-worth is a gift from our maker.
We don't have to earn it.
We don't have to work for it.
We cannot lose it.
We cannot diminish it.
That is something that I have believed my entire life now, that that is
something no one can take from us.
And it could, that's why I think it could maybe get a little bit mixed
up with what self-confidence is because that can fluctuate and it's
normal and it's very natural for our self-confidence to fluctuate.
Our self-Worth is more of like this internal knowing who I am.
Who I am.
One of my favorite affirmations is to say out loud, I was created by God Almighty.
He made me on purpose for a purpose, and I say it every day.
Now, even on days when I say that, some of those days I might be like, I.
Rolling in self-confidence.
Other days I, you know, it's a struggle, but I think that, the key
is to finding some tools for you, what works for you, and maybe what works
for me doesn't work for everybody.
But I have found some tools that I feel like work for me that help me to raise
my self-confidence and, and not let that, not let my high confidence day or my low
confidence days like affect my self-worth.
Let my self-worth be this, this, you know, it's anchored.
It's anchored in my maker, it's anchored in my identity, but, and my, even if it,
I'm having a low self-confidence day, that doesn't have to, it can't affect
my self-worth because that isn't innate in me because of all the things that I
believe.
Lindsay: I love that.
What are the tools that have worked for you?
Because I feel like there's so many times when.
When it's like women are told, love yourself, have confidence.
Be yourself.
You know, all of these, these great sayings that are like, yeah, that's great.
And then there are some women out there who are like, well, how do I love myself?
How do I have confidence in my abilities like that?
Those are great ideas, but what does that look like day to day and
what, what is like the trenches of discovering that for yourself?
Emilee Roberts: Okay, I'm gonna start on kind of more surface level because maybe
that's a little bit easier for most of us.
I'm most confident when I do things that bring me joy.
And the thing about that and confidence is what brings me joy might
bring, not bring other people joy.
You know, we're all very different in that, in, in what lights us up
can be different and we're created, we're supposed to be that way.
That's, so that's a good thing.
But something for me, like I, I said I've.
Almost nine years I've been in the beauty industry and not just like the
beauty industry, but like the online social media, beauty industry, and that
is really scary place to be sometimes.
It would've been very easy for me to enter this space originally
and to have have said, well, the only way I am beautiful is if I am
I always put together and, and have my hair done, and I'm outta my
yoga pants, and I put some makeup on, like I could have, I could
have labeled that as my standard.
But instead, I, I kind of used, started to make it a tool, like I, I started learning
new skills and, and it wasn't like.
makeup that started making me feel more confident.
But it was the, the process, I think you used that word earlier too, the
process of learning some skills that that brought me joy and I started to
have fun creating, and I'm not a super artistic or creative person, but I was
learning these skills that was allowing me to work on myself as this canvas.
I mean, I've, I have come to learn that I am, I am beautiful when I roll out of bed
and I have my bed head, and I, you know, haven't done a single thing for the day.
That's, that's not my beauty.
My beauty is more my self worth.
My beauty was gifted to me by my maker.
But my confidence can come from what can I do to just feel a little bit
better and bring myself some joy?
So I know for me, when I put on my favorite lipstick.
That is me setting the intention to be confident that day.
It makes me feel good, and I think that that is the important part of that.
It's not the lipstick.
I mean, I think it's fun, but the important part is my intention.
I have identified something that I know when I do that.
It, it me saying, I am intending to feel confident.
I'm reaching for that tool.
For me that brings me joy.
For me, another thing that brings me joy is to spend some time in the sun.
And maybe that sounds a little bit weird, like to be outside and in the sun and,
oh, I'm feeling more confident, but it brings me joy and I've learned that
when I am more joyful, I am simply more confident because I'm more content.
And I think that there's some correlation between those, those
words.
Lindsay: I love that.
That is so powerful.
The setting intention.
It's not the lipstick, it's the setting the intention.
I think sometimes I.
Individuals can look at somebody who maybe puts on the lipstick and be
like, well, that's a superficial thing.
So they're not, that's not real confidence.
So I love the fact that you, you were very like, quick to say that's
it's not the lipstick and it's actually whatever somebody chooses,
it's not gonna be that thing.
The setting the intention.
That is so good.
Okay.
What else?
do you feel like has worked for you?
Emilee Roberts: One of the tools that I love to use is I, I feel the most
confident when I keep my word to myself.
I.
So when I follow through with what I tell myself I'm going to do,
or maybe even what I tell another person that I'm going to do.
But when I follow through with that and when I stay committed to
what I've set my intentions to be, it makes me feel more confident.
It makes me feel like I can rely on me, rely so others can rely on me.
You are in the fitness space.
That's how I found you and I have gone through a pretty big transformation
in my life with my habits, with like the physical, whatever, you know, but
the, the real transformation that has happened with that has been internal.
And I really believe with my whole heart that that came
because I kept my word to myself.
I followed through with what I said I wanted to do, and I don't
want that to be confused with.
I followed through to have this big result.
It was more that I, I followed through on one day to get more
steps in, to drink some water and to be mindful of what I ate.
And it was like this one day at a time thing.
It was the process.
We've used that word several times.
It was the process of.
I stayed committed to the word that I made to myself.
Like I said, I did what I said I was going to do.
And again, not to be confused with this big, like, you know, wild result or
transformation, but you know, I, I, I said today I'm going to move my body.
And I did.
I, that was a, that was a confidence booster, not because of a result
that came from it, but because I did what I set out to do.
Lindsay: I love that.
I, I refer to that as having integrity.
Mm-Hmm.
You cannot, you cannot help but love yourself when you have integrity, when
your beliefs and your actions start lining up, and the more they line up, the
more confidence self-love comes through.
And what's crazy about it is it's like your circle of
influence, begins to just grow.
It does.
And people can like see it.
Why do I feel drawn to her?
Why do I want to be around her?
Why do I want to step into, they don't even realize that they're doing
it, but they're stepping into your circle of influence and that comes
when, when somebody has integrity.
And I all, I love that you brought up that it's not.
It is not the outcome.
I love watching movies, uh, like sports movies or like the Hero's
Journey kind of movies like Thor.
I love that movie.
I love that you see this, this little boy 'cause he was a boy, like fall fail.
And then the Hero's Journey or the sports team, it's like you
see a sports team and they win.
You see the end result and you're like, that's cool, but then when you hear
the whole background story of all of these individuals, you realize that it
wasn't the winning that was amazing.
It was the journey that they, that they made.
Yes, that was absolutely so amazing and you just love it.
So much.
And I do believe that you're right.
I am in the fitness and health industry and it is really, really,
really hard it's really hard to detach the results from the process.
Because obviously the process will lead to the results, but people get
fixated on the results being, oh, that's, that's when she loved herself.
That's when she accepted herself.
I'm like, actually, no.
The real before and after was the journey through it, the process in
which she began having integrity, doing the things that she told herself
that she was gonna do and becoming the person who she always wanted to become.
And it actually has little to do with the outcome.
It has to do with the process and that the process was refined, the lifestyle
was refined, and that's where the, the power of it really, really resides.
I feel like.
Emilee Roberts: I completely
agree, and I think the reason that it's so important to stay
focused and more attached to your process rather than the results,
the danger in being so like, obsessed with the results and that end goal is that it
is, it's honestly such a fickle thing.
It, it can move anytime you hit a goal and then you think, oh, I
guess that really didn't do it.
I don't feel any better because it's not enough.
I want that thing.
And, and you know, like maybe, maybe you start by thinking, oh,
I'm, I'm gonna lose 20 pounds.
If I lose 20 pounds, that is it.
I will have arrived.
It will be all that I ever wanted it to be.
And then maybe you, you do that and you realize, well,
I, that didn't feel like it.
I guess I don't look the way I thought I would look, or it didn't
feel the way I thought I would feel, or I wish I could do more.
That that's not enough.
And so you, you find yourself in this dangerous trap of, the results will
for sure bring me confidence, but then when they don't, then what do you have?
You know, if, if you missed that beautiful journey that you just went on and you
discredit the person you had to become to work for those results, and you discredit
the growth and the, all the expansion that you had to go through to get there.
Then you're gonna find yourself in this position where it will never be enough.
And the results, no matter how big, you'll always find yourself wanting more.
And I don't think, I don't know, there's this hard balance because
I don't think there's, um, it's not awful to, to always want to be striving
for more and to progress and to grow.
But if you get so caught up with that result, then the danger is that.
You will never find contentment.
You will never find joy, and you will never feel that self-confidence that truly
every person on earth deserves to feel.
So it has to come from the journey.
It has to come from that integrity of showing up and doing what you said
you were going to do, and finding joy in the journey and joy in the
process so that you get to feel that.
And not just at that climax or at the peak of Everest.
It's, it's not supposed to be saved for a finish line because you can
move your finish line, anytime.
Lindsay: It's always moving.
Yes.
Is 100% always moving.
And I get people asking me that question, how, how can you be happy?
Or will you ever be satisfied?
That is a question that I get a lot and I'm like, oh, I
think we're all confused here.
I'm actually quite satisfied.
Like, I'm quite happy.
Um, anything more is just icing on the cake.
I can always practice confidence, like you said, like that's something
that always comes and goes.
But I actually think that me going to the gym, it's no longer actually about a look.
It may have started out that way, but it's not.
It's every single day I like, testing myself.
I like getting into the uncomfortable.
I like pushing myself.
I wanna see like what boundaries can I push today?
What can I accomplish today?
And that is so directly tied, like you said, to confidence.
'cause it really is.
I.
It's not that I've reached it, it's no, every day I'm testing the waters
and what else am I capable of?
And I love that you brought up that self-Worth is not even in question.
That's not even on the table.
That was, that was established long ago.
This is now just an exciting, fun journey of who can you become, what can you do?
But none of that adds anything.
I.
To your worth as an individual.
It, it's actually really cool to be at that place where you've almost let
go of a desire to prove who you are to anybody, including yourself, because
you already know your worth doesn't change, but yet you're, you love
yourself so much that you're propelled to continue to push your boundaries
and see what else can I accomplish?
What else can I do?
And I was thinking about this, you know, with me having my Instagram
account all being all about fitness.
Um, I think that people get the wrong idea that they think, I think health
is just about nutrition and training.
Um, but, but health, for me, it's about so many other things.
It's about, um, my relationships.
It's about like my emotional health, my spiritual health, um, my intellectual,
like I, I think that all of these things come together and create health.
And so if I can become a person who learns how to push my boundaries in one
aspect, like going to the gym and being able to hit a new pr, that actually
empowers me to take that confidence.
I.
Now into other aspects of my life that maybe I couldn't have a difficult relation
or a difficult conversation with somebody, but I can pull a little confidence
from what I do in the gym every day.
Love that.
I can pull a little of that.
Emilee Roberts: I love that so much.
Lindsay: I do wanna talk about your morning routine.
Okay.
But here's my thing.
Okay.
I have a morning routine.
Well, I'm pregnant now.
That morning routine is gone.
It is gone.
This is survival mode.
It will be resurrected another day.
But, so I do wanna talk about your morning routine, but I just wanna let
other people know that I, there are, there's power in, in rituals in having
these routines and these rituals.
Emilee does it, uh, what time?
What time do you get up in the morning?
My alarm goes off at five
Emilee Roberts: and I Okay.
Don't push snooze.
And it took me a long time to get to where I don't push snoo, but I know
that everything is better when I don't.
So
Lindsay: everything, do you know what, that's the first, that's,
that's the first hard thing you do.
You start out the day doing hard things and then just like
Emilee Roberts: you said, you can take a little confidence from that.
I just did this hard thing and I can take that confidence into whatever other
hard things I have to face that day.
Lindsay: Yeah, because I already did one.
Yeah, but but yours begins, you have this like ritual and I saw it on Instagram
and I was like, I love this woman.
Like.
She's like my people.
Um, 'cause I'm like, this is so, this is so powerful.
But as you listen to Emilee talk, guys, I want you to keep in mind that this
is hers that she's discovered and found probably with a, with trial and error.
Mm-Hmm.
And you're flexible and you don't, you all listening, you don't have
to do it at five in the morning.
Um, you do it when works best for you.
You have to figure that out.
But I do want you to share, okay, so you, the alarm goes off
at five, you don't hit snooze.
Walk us through your morning.
Emilee Roberts: So it's, well, I guess I should back up.
I really feel like it probably starts the night before I set out my clothes.
And again, that's me setting my intention of what I'm going to do the next day.
I set out my clothes, my workout stuff.
I've looked through my app and I see what's coming up for my training.
Um, and I go to bed knowing I already just know, well, this
is what time I alarm goes off.
I'm not gonna be surprised when I, it beeps at me and it's like, what?
That's a five.
No, I'm not surprised.
Um, so it goes off, I get up, I get dressed.
I, um, before I really start to do anything, um, well
first, let me back up again.
Sorry.
I, I kind of have adapted this from, uh, practice, from a book
called The Miracle Morning.
Yeah.
So maybe people have read that.
Maybe they've heard it, but I've had, so that that's technically showing us what
they call the perfect morning routine.
And I have taken that perfect morning routine and made my
Emilee's Perfect morning routine.
So in that morning routine, it, it tells you to have some silence.
And I'm sure that what that means is meditation.
Now for me, my silence just looks like some little bit of prayer where me
and God have a little talk to start the day, and I ask him for help.
And I, and I, you know, tell, tell 'em what's on my mind.
And so that's where I start.
Um, after that.
Walk into my office because that's a quiet space, and I'll sit and I
will say my affirmations out loud.
I I said one of them for you here.
That I am created by God Almighty.
He made me on purpose for a purpose.
I have a list and I basic, I mean, I haven't memorized now, I've been using
it for a few years, and anytime I find one though, I write it down on my list.
I have it, I do.
I have a physical list.
I don't have to read it every day anymore.
But if I, if I think of something or I read something and it feels like it
belongs to me, I write it down and I will start including it in my list.
After that, I'll sit and I'll just kind of visualize like, these are the
things that I have going on today.
This is what I hope my home feels like.
This is what I hope I can, how?
How I hope I can respond when my kids test my patients.
This is how I hope I can respond to a surprise or something
unexpected or something hard.
This is what I'm visualizing for, like my goals, my future.
This is what I'm working on with my husband.
Our family, this is what I'm working on for me and my business.
I, I focus, focus on and visualize what I am working on for my
physical and my health goals.
I like to run and I will often visualize, you know, what that's gonna feel like
when I, um, cross the finish line of a next race or something like that.
So that visualization is huge.
The next thing I do is I, I'll pick up my gratitude journal, and over the years
my gratitude journal has changed because you tend to fill up a journal when you
write in it every day, which is probably one of my greatest accomplishments
of my life, that I've actually filled an entire journal more than once.
Because how many of us have started one?
I know.
Then we leave it and then we come back to it and we read it and we're so embarrassed
by whatever it was that we wrote, but I, I, so I might have looked different.
Like sometimes I've used ones that have prompts and I'm, I'm not, I'm not good
at journaling, like, you know, depicting everything that's happening in my life.
Right Then.
But I, but I will just write down three simple things.
I'm grad grateful for just three simple things, and I often repeat things.
It will often say I'm so grateful for my bed because I always am.
And if I can't think of something, I can always go back to that.
And the reason I love this gratitude journal is whenever I face hard things,
which is daily, we all do daily.
Whenever something's hard, whenever I feel defeated, whenever I feel down,
maybe even just whenever I feel that lack of confidence, I have this book.
Is filled with my blessings.
There is always something good.
So in those hard moments in, in my trenches, I can always open that and
I find something that reminds me.
I am loved, I am safe.
My life is okay.
I will get through this.
And I always have my bed.
I always have a diet.
I always have just whatever it is that might bring me joy.
So my, my gratitude.
Gratitude journal isn't always, um, deep.
Sometimes it is, but it doesn't have to be.
It sometimes can just be.
I'm grateful for a Diet Coke and that's,
Lindsay: yeah.
I'm so glad that you brought that up.
'cause I cannot tell you, I've done so many gratitude journals and you do, you
kind of run out of things and then you give yourself weird expectations, right?
Like this has to be like, my grandchildren need to be wowed by
my, by my amount of gratitude here.
Right?
We set ourselves up with the weirdest expectations of.
What it looks like to journal and to show up for yourself.
But one thing that I'm, that I'm noticing is you are keeping things so simple.
It, I mean this whole
Emilee Roberts: routine, I mean, I've talked longer about it than
it takes me to go through it.
Lindsay: It simple.
It doesn't take two hours for you.
No, it doesn't.
No.
This is
Emilee Roberts: like a 15 to 20 minute thing.
The next thing I do is I will read and, and for me that's, um, I mean, you can
pick whatever you wanna read, but I do think that there's a lot of power in
saying, I'm gonna read and I'm gonna grow.
For me, I like to study my scriptures and, wherever, whatever that might look like.
But that's what I like to study when I'm reading.
And that's maybe the part that takes me the longest is as far as what I
do before I start to move my body.
But that's what I finish it with.
I, I will.
Um, I work out at my house in my garage, in our little home gym.
That's, it's, it's actually pretty great.
My husband's done a really good job of, of expanding what we have for our space here.
And, and then I, I go out and I, I either go for a run or I lift and, and it's
like this, you know, pinnacle of, I've, I've prepped myself, I've prepped my
heart, I've prepped my mind, and now I'm going to let my body do something that
brings me joy and, and then at the end of this, that's like, I, I don't know.
I just, I just feel a little bit more ready to take on a day.
It, it's, it's set my intent and it's helped my mindset and it's
one of the things that really does bring me confidence because I.
I'm doing, it's the process of doing and becoming a version of
myself that I'm excited about.
I like the version of myself that stays committed to these little simple steps.
And, and yes, I do it at five and no, you don't have to do it
at five, but I've learned that.
For me it, I need to do it before my kids get going, and someday all of my kids
will be in school all at the same time.
And then maybe I can adjust it and maybe I'll want to do it then.
But right now, for me, I have to prioritize getting that done because
I like the person I am when I do, and that person has to do it at five.
Lindsay: That's, that is so, I love that so much and I'm, I'm really
jealous that you can do it at five.
'cause I loved my five o'clock.
It, the, the house is dead.
Yes.
The kids are still asleep.
Right.
It's peaceful.
It is so peaceful.
And I always tell people I.
I'm not reactive.
I didn't begin the day reacting to everybody else and everybody's emotions
and their needs and their wants.
It's like, no.
I actually began the day being proactive to my own health.
I.
I love that.
I mean, you, you kind of ticked off all of those boxes.
You know, your physical, your mental, your spiritual, your emotional, like,
all of those things you ticked off.
And I, I also love the fact that it's so, it doesn't have to be two hours.
Where I have failed is when I try to make it this two hour big, thing.
And um, I was listening to, oh, what is his name?
Brandon Brouchard.
Oh, Brouchard.
Emilee Roberts: Yeah.
Brouchard.
Yes, I know him.
Lindsay: Okay.
I love him too.
Yes.
One day I will get his last name down, but I really do love him.
I was listening to a book that he only has on Audible right now.
In fact, I just barely shared it on Instagram and let me share it again.
The name of it, because it's not a book, it is only on Audible and it
is called The Six Habits of Growth.
And he talks about there has to be a routine.
It doesn't have to be in the morning, although, um, there's
some really good research showing.
15 minutes in the morning.
That's all it took.
That's all it took was 15 minutes.
And he gave this this short little, or 15 to 20 I think.
And he gave this short list of you've just gotta do these, these little tiny things
just move, you've gotta get up and move.
You do have to have the quiet and the, and then, um, reading.
And for me, I actually do the, the reading and the, the moving at the same time.
I do audible and I walk, so everybody, you guys can make this your own, but
it, I, it is such a wonderful thing to do it and show up for yourself at
the beginning of the day, especially.
It's so powerful.
It really,
Emilee Roberts: it, it just, it sets my intention for the rest of the day
I feel like I, I, you know, just that, that proactive or reactive, I,
I react to challenges differently.
I am more confident in my parenting.
I'm more excited, more confident in my relationship with my husband because
I'm, I'm doing something that is, is setting the stage for personal growth.
And you know, when you're, when you've been married, I, I've been married
for 13 years and you, you, you should grow in that 13 years as a, as an
individual and as a partnership with your relationship with your spouse.
And I don't know that I would have a lot of time to do that growth if I didn't
schedule that time for that growth.
Lindsay: I love that.
That's so powerful.
Okay, is there anything else, Emilee, anything else that you just wish women
knew when it came to self-confidence?
Any other tools?
Anything we missed that you just kind of wanted to, to add to this discussion?
I've loved this.
I've
Emilee Roberts: loved it too.
Thank you.
I think that I would, first, I just wanna go back to that self worth.
And really, I would really want whoever listens to find a way to believe
that your self worth is automatic.
It is a gift.
It cannot be taken away another's, another person's opinion
cannot take that from you.
Another person's judgment or criticisms cannot diminish it.
Your self-worth is yours.
It is for you, a gift for you, and your confidence is in a lot of ways this choice
that you get to make of I'm going to choose to do and to be, and to act in the
ways that bring me confidence and joy.
So I'm completely free to choose that.
It's not something that's saved for her over there.
It's not something saved for somebody special.
It's a gift for you too.
You just have to choose to go through the motions that are going to bring
you that contentment, that joy.
And for me, those kinds of things are what leads to confidence.
When I'm growing, when I'm keeping the promises I make to myself, when I
am doing things that bring me joy, I will have these little moments of, oh.
Maybe that is what confidence feels like.
You know, that's, I I and it, you have to work for it every day.
You don't have to work for your self-worth.
You really don't.
That's just yours.
But the confidence that, that is something that we continually have
to work on, you know, it's, it's a choice though, that we get to make.
And if we choose to do those things that put us in that
space and set the intention of.
I, this, that's why I'm doing this.
That's why I am doing this, is to feel confident.
It's, it will come, it has to come.
It has to start with the choice, and it has to start with the intention, but the
confidence will follow the choice and the
intention.
Lindsay: I love that.
Awesome.
Thank you so much, Emilee.
Okay.
How do they, how do people find you?
Is it mainly on Instagram?
Do you have a website, anything like that?
Emilee Roberts: Yes, it's mainly on Instagram.
I have a Facebook business page that, um, honestly, that started as it's called
Inside Out Beauty by Emilee Roberts.
And that started as me just trying to show moms who we really don't know
what we're doing with our makeup, but how they can do their makeup to
just feel a little bit of confidence.
It's not the makeup, but it's just that doing something creative that
maybe if you at least like you kind of know what you're doing, then maybe,
maybe you'll dare try something.
So I have a Facebook business page and then my Instagram page.
Yes.
Lindsay: Awesome.
Okay.
We will link both of those in the notes so that people can find you.
Thank you so much for coming on the show today.
Thank you so much
Emilee Roberts: for inviting me.
This, I felt very inadequate to talk about it because it's still a journey.
I'm on myself every day, but this was good for me to dive into.
Where does that come from for me?
And you're someone who I've looked up to for years, so I'm so
Lindsay: honored.
Thank you.
Oh, thank you.
Okay, we'll talk to you guys later.