Alison: Bananas.
Go, go bananas.
Matt: Go bananas.
Go, go bananas.
Hi Alison.
Alison: Hi, Matt.
Matt: How are you?
Alison: Great.
I didn't, I didn't do an outline for today.
Matt: You didn't do an outline for wait.
Well, what?
Alison: I know.
Matt: What does that mean?
Alison: I guess it means we're wingin' it.
Interestingly enough, we don't have an outline today, yet I
feel more prepared than normal be well, because we had homework.
Matt: We had homework gave each other homework today.
Yeah.
Alison: So I guess homework supersedes outline.
Matt: Yeah.
Uh huh.
That works.
Alison: You don't sound at all convinced.
Matt: I don't know anything.
Okay.
Today we're gonna deviate a little bit from the topics that
we normally bring on ADHd20.
We think it's gonna be fun because, when we say D&D of course, we mean
D&D .When we say ADHD, of course, we mean ADHD, but sometimes there's room
in there for all manner of nerdery.
And one, one just precious corner of the multiverse that a
lot of people like to talk about.
And we like to talk about, uh, is television, movies, that
kind of like world of fun.
And, um, we're thinking that every once in a while we might just like
pick a TV show or a movie and see how much ADHD coding is found within
that movie or television show.
And by coding, what I mean is when, when something is coding, that means like
you're watching it and you're like, Ooh, Ooh, that there's an underlying message
there that the writers, actors, directors are trying to say, they're trying to
point out without actually saying it.
Right.
It's coded.
And so, um, uh, for example, a very recent example of something that I saw that
I was like, Ooh, Miss Marvel has ADHD.
And sure enough, it turns out that Kamala Kahn does not officially have ADHD in
in the world of Marvel comics, but the director specifically made choices
that said this kid, this kid has ADHD.
Which I thought was super fun.
Super cool.
Interesting.
It's all speculation.
We don't know anything about anything.
So it's just, it's just us just like, Hmm.
Is this happening?
Is It's also not like we're trying to make everybody have ADHD.
We're not.
We promise though, you know,
Alison: No, we're pretty exclusive about our, our cool kids club.
We don't, we don't, we don't want
Matt: want them the sweaty masses.
Yeah.
Alison: No new friends.
was excellent, excellent explanation of coding.
Um,
Matt: And I do promise everybody, like, it's I get really, um, maybe overly
sensitive about this, but I really do want everyone to know that I'm
not trying to see, ADD in everything.
It really is specific.
It's a thing.
And I think, I think that, uh, in some ways it, it also helps, like
if it, if it's something that you live with and you see someone on
screen that you can really relate to.
So today's example, today's TV choice that we're gonna go with, that we're
gonna discuss for fun, began in 1997.
And I can tell you from experience in 1997, people didn't really talk
about ADD as much as they do now.
Maybe a little bit more than they did when I was in high school, but, we're entering
the world of Buffy the Vampire Slayer,
Alison: Yeah.
Matt: on today's ADHd20.
I have seen all of Buffy and, and, and Alison recently has
we figured why not start there?
And people love it and it's fun.
And, and Anna's already got the guitar riff
Alison: Yep.
Um, I watched Buffy because of one Matthew Bivins.
It, it was you and Genna Cohen.
The year was 2019.
We were living on a tour bus and had nothing else to do.
So we said let's watch Buffy.
Uh,
Matt: It was, it was tough for you.
It's a tough sell.
Alison: It was tough sell because I was afraid that it would scare me.
And then we watched the first episode and I, I laughed a lot.
So then I knew it was gonna be okay.
There really was only one episode that stood out in my brain as
scary, which was Hush, of course.
Matt: That is terrifying.
There's a few.
I'm not, I'm not saying it's not scary completely, but.
Alison: There were parts of my Buffy watching as an adult that
were massively entertaining.
Wonderful.
And there were parts that were, Hmm.
Really didn't like seasons 4 through 6.
Matt: Painful.
I know we did warn you.
We warned you.
It is not, it is not the most consistent show.
However, I still hold that there are episodes in this TV program,
especially for its age, you know, I think they were groundbreaking.
Absolutely.
Just completely groundbreaking, examples of television that probably then
influenced television of all genres, horror, non-horror, romance, teen, comedy.
Alison: Well, you know what we have to do first, Matt,
Matt: Yes we do.
Alison: Before, before we get into the real topic at hand, we've
gotta, we gotta roll some dice.
Do you wanna do a D 20 roll off to find out which one of us is gonna ask first?
Matt: Oh, just keep rolling.
Rolling.
Alison: I wanna roll
Matt: Rolling.
Rolling.
Alison: You're probably gonna be going first.
Matt: Yeah, I got a 16
Alison: I got three.
So.
Matt: dang.
Alison: Mattie B what'd you roll on your beautiful,
Matt: All
Alison: your D 100
Matt: I rolled dun dun dun number nine.
Number
Alison: Number nine.
Matt: Nine.
Alison: This is, this is fitting in perfect.
Do any of your D&D characters and I'll let you as the DM choose any of the
NPCs that you pilot as well have ADHD.
And why?
Matt: What?
Oh,
Alison: Hit 'em with a stump-town right out of the
Matt: Mm-hmm I'm going to say, that I didn't, I haven't thought about
this, but it's very possible that my character, um, that is a fairy.
She lives in the land of Fey and sometimes pops out.
she's very studious.
Her name is Rosie but here's the thing is that she really loves magic.
She loves studying magic and that's never, that is never been something
that she's, she's had a problem doing.
Like it's a endlessly interesting thing to her.
And that's one thing to remember, you know, ADHD is not about
just, I can't do things ever.
Some things you do extremely well, if you love them and you want to do them.
And I think for Rosie, Um, she's lucked out because magic and exploring the world
and, learning about other people has been something that she's really loved.
But I would guess that if, when she has to do stuff that she doesn't want to do, like
clean her room or , or, you know, study science and mathematics, just guessing.
Yeah.
She's probably not that great.
I would say Rosie, that's my, that's my vote.
Alison: That tracks, that absolutely tracks.
She's also a
Matt: Rosie.
Yes.
Alison: with that's usual,
Matt: Rosie.
I would say Rosie is in some ways, at this point in my very small player
character world is probably, uh, probably the player that's the most like me.
She's a lot more millennial, a lot more millennial than but I.
I think there's a lot in Rosie that, that I, that I kin too.
Alison: I
Matt: Yeah.
So that's mine.
How about, do you, what'd you roll?
Alison: Excellent.
I rolled a 16, please.
No, that's a lie.
You rolled a 16.
I rolled a 46 just.
Had that had that six,
Matt: Ooh, interesting.
Gosh, this is great.
This is a, this is a table that was a little bit crowdsourced.
Uh, and also a lot of it came out of your brain.
This is really nice.
I, I really like these.
Today's question for you, Alison.
What, what is your phone's lock screen?
Alison: Uh, my phone's lock screen changes every single day because I have ADHD.
And I don't like to look at the same thing for too long.
Um, so because I am friends with you, I, you know, learn all about automations.
And so I, uh, am a big fan of an artist named Morgan Harper Nichols.
Uh, and she has a very, very beautiful app.
If you do not follow her on social media, you should cuz she does these watercolors
with just these very inspirational thoughts, quips, quotes, and otherwise.
So every single day I get like a daily message.
Um, and so all those I like, I save to a special little folder and then I
have the folder tied to an automation.
That at sunrise, every morning, changes my lock screen to something new.
And then I get to wake up and feel empowered.
Um, and that's like my message for the day.
And today says not in a hurry.
Matt: Uh,
Alison: I am taking my time and blooming at my own pace.
Matt: That's great.
Alison: A little, a little peak inside of my brain for you.
Matt: Bang, bang.
Alison: Well, now that, that that's out of the way.
So for this episode today, Matt and I did something that I'm, I
know I'm no fan of, I'm just gonna guess you probably aren't either.
We gave ourselves homework.
Matt: I don't usually like homework, but this wasn't too hard to do.
Alison: Yeah.
Our homework was like pick a few episodes of Buffy and just get
reacquainted with some mannerisms.
Uh, some of our favorite characters in planning this episode, we both
very quickly, very readily agreed on one character that we know has ADHD.
Um, and we were just gonna kind of go and look for some specific
examples and then see kind of who else tickled our ADHD fan fancy.
That
Matt: Mm-hmm I dipped, I dipped a little bit into other neuro divergent, um,
Alison: Oh,
Matt: uh, brains types as well.
Alison: I noticed, I noticed where I noticed it, but I like kept just telling
myself, like, don't go down those rabbit holes, cuz then suddenly you're
gonna not come with the assignment.
And you're gonna have like decided who is on the autism spectrum and
who is suffering some kind of PTSD or narcissism disorder or otherwise.
But I do have thoughts naturally surprise.
Matt: Yay.
Um,
Alison: Um, So what, in, in prepping for this, can I ask
you what episodes you watched?
Matt: Yes.
Uh, so we did give each other this homework just a couple of days ago,
so, um, I didn't have a ton of time.
But what I wanted to do is I know that the characters evolved over
the years and also we're talking about six seasons—or it seven?
Seven seasons.
And so, you know, we're, you know, that's a lot and I know that actors
change ideas and so on and so forth.
But I wanted to say like from the minute that you meet these
characters, were my theories correct?
And they were, I think, I think instantly they were correct.
So I went with episode number one, season one, first out of the gate.
Yeah.
Which is not, you know, the first season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer,
for those of you who haven't watched it, isn't the best one.
Alison: It's cinematic brilliance.
What are you talking about?
Matt: It's not, it's difficult.
Uh, you know, there's many people who say, oh, you can just start at season two.
You'd be okay.
But I don't know.
There's like, there's just a delightful awkwardness to the first, you know,
30, 40 minutes of Buffy number one that is like, you know, you meet
these characters for the first time.
And they are just, BOING!
Like just cliche, like instantly, you know, which is Joss Whedon's schtick.
And then that's the beauty of what he does is like, he'll, he'll
paint a picture and then he'll say, but these people have, you know,
Alison: Mm-hmm
Matt: More, uh, more varied colors.
So I watched number one and then, kind of went down a thread of other characters,
cuz there was one character that I thought, well, maybe, maybe she does.
And it, this is sort of the other neuro divergent idea that I had, which I think
would be interesting to talk about too.
I mean, look, we're already deviating from D&D we might as well, you know,
take a step out of ADHD as well.
And I dipped into a scene or two of The Body, which I think still
is my favorite episode of Buffy.
Um, that's always one that I, when I'm talking about groundbreaking
TV, just to me, that's just one of the, so anyway, those are my two,
but we can go, go into them more.
How about you?
Alison: I started with episode one just for a little bit, just cause
I do love kind of the assembling of the Scoobs and otherwise and
meeting Giles for the first time.
Of course.
So I watched, um, some of my personal favorite episodes from
season one and two, which were The Pack, The Puppet and Halloween.
Um,
Matt: Dang.
Strong.
Okay.
Alison: I specifically watched The Pack and Halloween, cuz I feel
like those are very strong Xander performances and I knew that we
were gonna talk about Xander a lot.
Matt: Yeah.
Alison: With this.
Matt: Spoiler alert.
It's gonna be about Xander, everybody.
Come on,
Alison: Da-dah!
Matt: But yeah, it's, it's so interesting.
I'll start off by saying, I don't, I don't know if there's an episode where they
even mention ADHD or anything like it.
Alison: Those weren't part of the vernacular of
Matt: It just really wasn't
Alison: Early aughts..
It wasn't the thing we were talking about.
Matt: Yeah.
And, and I think as people that are older.
And, and we remember a time where that wasn't really part of any kind
of, you know, really most disability.
I mean, geez, watch Glee.
And that was 2010 and just prepare to sob because it is so depressing
how they treat a kid in a wheelchair.
Anyway.
But yeah, you didn't, you didn't bandy about words like autism or
Asperger's or ADD you were just kind of.
Those people are weird or those people are wacky or those people talk too much, or
those people hurt themselves or whatever.
And, and that's also interesting, right?
In other words, what I'm saying is I know that the directors and
actors probably did not bring any of this into a show of that age.
Right.
1997.
I know that they probably did not.
However, it's funny how I am drawn to the characters, that have the
most have traits that are, that are most like mine too, which is fun.
Like I understood, I understood Xander.
Even watching it for the first time.
And so I think that's really fun.
Alison: I, yeah, I definitely watching it was immediately drawn to Xander.
And I think you can go one of two ways and you hit on this a few weeks ago
when we were talking about Friends as the reason that you don't really
care for Ross is because reminds you of maybe some of your less than
Matt: The less interesting parts of me.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Alison: And, and I, I know that too, when I, when I meet somebody who
is too similar to me, especially the not great sides of myself.
I tend to not like that person at all.
They annoy me.
And I'm unconsciously, subconsciously or otherwise, part of the problem
is that I know like those are my toxic traits just out on display.
And I don't dig that.
So interestingly enough, and you're either gonna love or hate this.
Um, one of the characters that I would like to bring forward for discussion
is your girl and not mine, Cordelia.
Matt: Ooh, let's do it.
Alison: And so, so just everybody knows my journey with Buffy.
I, I did not like Cordelia out of the gate and I.
I tried with Angel, you guys.
I really, really did, but I couldn't do it.
And so everybody's like, oh, Cordie's redemption arc comes in Angel.
If you could watch that, you might feel differently.
I'm not going to, so I don't, I just hate Cordy, uh, much
to Matt and Fitz's chagrin.
No, it's a big it's.
It's a no for me.
So I'm watching it through that lens of, I don't like Cordy.
And then like suddenly I heard your voice talking about Ross, like are
the reasons I don't like Cordelia things that are too similar to me.
And then I thought about one of my potentially most toxic traits when
it comes to my own ADHD or general personality, where does one end,
and the other begin is masking.
And that's something that has become kind of a hot term like coding and
otherwise, when we talk about all
Matt: Tell me about masking.
Alison: Uh, your ability or inability to cover up, what's really going
on by playing a certain part.
Um, and so a lot of people might not actually know what's going on with you.
And I'm sure that there's a far better, far more scientific
explanation of it than that.
But oftentimes it's not conscious, it's not somebody wakes up and says,
I'm going to play a jester today.
You know, they, they just get so good at just pushing
I
Matt: wish they would though.
Alison: Wouldn't that be
Matt: Mm-hmm
Alison: Shall be a bard.
Um, uh, Fitz has reminded me, I did name one of my D&D weapons Cordelia
take from that what you will.
See this also ties back into D&D we will never get fully away from it.
Um,
Matt: not sorry.
Alison: But I see, I, I realize now because, and so you often think of
the ones that are perceived as the very strong types who are really
some kind of broken inside as the ones who are experts at masking.
Um, and so they tend to have this certain presence about them.
And then, you know, the ones who really get to know them know that that's not
the true Cordy, Alison or otherwise.
Matt: Love
Alison: You have, have you have caught me masking in the past.
Um, and we have talked about that.
And so I wrote in, in big, like in my notes, IS THAT WHY I DON'T LIKE CORDELIA?
Matt: Oh,
Alison: Or is it that she's actually the worst, like, is,
is that my problem with her?
Um,
Matt: Drama.
Alison: and where I'm picking up on the potential for ADHD is at the beginning
of The Puppet Show, we, the episode opens with the auditions for the talent show
that Giles has been roped into producing.
And, uh, Cordy is trying to audition with Whitney Houston's The Greatest Love of
All, and she's doing a piss poor job.
And I'm wondering if maybe her ADHD kept her from practicing or getting to
her voice lessons or things like that.
And also, she kind of then has this very snide, you know, reaction to,
um, the way she's treated about like, okay, that that's enough enough, which
makes me think of myself when, if I'm not immediately good at something,
I get really hateful about it.
Matt: You do.
Alison: So.
Matt: Interesting.
Okay.
Where do we, where do we want to start?
Do we wanna go in some kind of order?
What if we started the first episode?
What if we just start like, um, Buffy number one.
We meet Buffy.
She, she has moved from LA because you don't really have to have
seen the movie, but it follows events that happened in the movie.
Basically Buffy burned down her school kind of thing accidentally.
Well, whoops, because she is a Slayer and she's The Chosen One and she,
but she's moved in this new place, Sunnydale and, wants a whole new life.
Does not want to be a Slayer, does not want to vanquish vampires just
wants to be a normal high school teen.
Which of course in the first episode immediately, it's impossible.
There's no way.
She is The Chosen One that she cannot shirk her duties.
And she tries many, many, many times in the first season.
It's basically just like, I quit.
I quit.
So anyway, we meet the main character and , she goes to school and she's dreading it a
little bit understandably she's, you know, she's had some tough times at schools.
So she goes in and, and she's like a cute blonde girl from the late
nineties, which means, you know, she makeup and blonde hair and mini skirt
and, you know, cheerleader-y right.
And so there's like all of this, like record scratching of, uh, you know,
boys that are like, who's the new girl, you know, all of this stuff.
Where is her social standing gonna, you know, spin out,
right?
Alison: That's the first thing that happens is that Cordy schools her on who
is, who is acceptable to talk to, cuz Cordy is trying to figure out like, does
she want to be friends with a new girl?
And if she does, she's gotta make sure that she doesn't go for the Willows.
Matt: Yes.
Right, right.
But, and before that though, it's like really, truly in the first five minutes
we meet Xander and, and he is this dufus.
I mean, he is a dufus, like he's a, he's a handsome kid.
But he's on a skateboard and he's not aware of his surroundings.
He thinks it's okay to skateboard through like an enormous crowd full of people.
And so in the first few minutes that we meet him he's like
trying to get through this crowd.
He sees Buffy, he's like WOOGAH WOOGAH!
And he slams into stairs and he like knocks himself down.
There's like a lack of awareness there.
That's very, you know, clumsy as hell.
So he gets up, he recovers from that and he's just kind
of like just, just focused on.
And then, then you meet Willow a good friend of his and their conversation
in, in this first few minutes is, Hey, Willow, can, can we meet this afternoon?
Can you help me with, you know, I'm having problems with the math.
Right.
And she says, what part of the math he's like the math, right?
Because he can't focus on math cuz he can't, he can't do it.
Cuz he's too busy.
I don't know.
His favorite thing is skating.
I don't know what his favorite thing is yet.
We don't know that yet, but he's, he's like just a goof.
He runs into Buffy literally.
She drops something and he kind of turns around and he tries to help,
her pick things up and he can't speak and he can't finish his sentences
and he says the wrong things.
And I know that they're playing it as, as this guy has a crush on this
girl instantly, like he's nervous.
I get it.
And that is.
That is true, but there's so many different versions of that, But his
specifically was all these ADD things, all these things that like, when you
are in this heightened state, your brain just starts boiling and you just,
Alison: You
Matt: can't, Out.
You can't speak, you can't do it.
Um, his friend, Jesse actually calls him a bibbling idiot, but he's also
at the same time he's got this, like, he's got this ease and this charm
he's got this, he's really charming.
And when he can kind of calm down, he's really very funny, you know?
So he is got all these different pieces going on at the same time.
And I just...
you know, I was like, Xander man, Xander's the guy.
Alison: Xander's the guy.
My first note on him is non specifically Xander often has a hard time expressing
himself or saying what he means.
It's like the words in his head don't sync with what he's actually trying to say.
Matt: Yep.
Mm-hmm
Alison: I would call him affable at best and a bibbling idiot.
More normally.
In The Pack um, there is a joke made about, uh, Xander is habitually late.
Matt: Mmm.
Alison: It's an expectation that they have.
Um, let's see, what else.
He's the most susceptible to mixing things up.
He's constantly trying to find his place.
So we're, we see him get into all of these hijinks, especially in the first
two seasons, cuz he's just so desperately looking where am I gonna fit in?
What am I gonna do where don't I stand out?
Um, which I think can sometimes be a very ADHD trait of like, this is the thing.
Maybe this goes back to masking.
Like I don't want this to be the thing about me that I don't wanna be an idiot.
I don't want people to know me as the person who talks
faster than they can think.
And so as a result, you're trying to find some other label.
So you're literally trying on other tropes, archetypes whatever.
Matt: Uh huh.
Alison: Um, to get to that.
And I even wrote this resonates with me as someone who spent a
lot of time masking to fit in.
I noted that the Scoobs have to stay on his case to get stuff done.
He's the one that they're constantly having to circle back to.
And are you gonna be here at this time?
Are you gonna do this?
Are you sure?
Can you, you know, everybody else tends to kind of get their marching
orders and, and go off to do them.
And it's always, Xander is the one we think is gonna fuck up.
Matt: Yes.
Alison: Always.
Matt: I know.
And it's it.
Am I, am I wrong in saying that it's usually like at, at the last minute
too, he's always kind of like just coming in, rushing in late last minute.
Not getting the job done until the last minute or not
doing it, not getting it done.
Alison: The other thing I, so I mentioned that maybe this is, you can tell me
if I'm digging too deep on this one, but in the, in the Halloween episode...
Sometimes Xander hyper fixates on something to an extreme level.
So that it's overdone.
There were three or four Halloween episodes, but in the very first one,
that's the one where they all fall under that spell that turns them
into whatever they're dressed up as, and Xander comes into Buffy's house,
he's dressed as an army commander.
So he's in full fatigues and he comes into her house, spewing, military tactics,
like, like, I mean, just rolling off of his tongue in a way we've never seen
Xander be able to do before, probably from all the video games he played.
This is a boy of the nineties after all.
Um, but I just think it's funny.
It's overdone to a point that I'm looking at it as being coded for a hyper fixation.
And you notice that whenever Xander gets into trouble, like, he is
able to always get so deep into the knowledge of whatever has befallen him.
It's like that, that information was somewhere in the back of his
head, all along, cuz he's able to tap into it a little bit too easily.
So it's like that question we got on the d100 table a couple weeks ago
where it was, what's something that you have gone down such a rabbit
hole on, you know, researching that you've become an accidental expert.
I feel like if you know, Google had been fully available to Xander in
97, the way it is to us today on a smartphone, like he, there would be
random things that he would just pop off.
I just, I feel like that's Xander on a core level.
Matt: No, I'm in I'm into that.
I'm into that.
Yeah.
Alison: I wrote somewhere deep inside, there's some layer of
his sweet little neuro divergent brain, just ready to unleash that
level of chaos and specificity.
I took my assignment really, really seriously you guys.
Matt: You did, but that is great.
Uh, yes.
Alison: I'm just thinking of this.
It would also explain if, if both Xander and Cordelia are ADHD, it would
explain why ultimately there was an attraction between the two of them.
Why they would both spend the first season and a half being so disgusted
and then like one day be like, just kidding and just make out central, like
it, that explained so much of that.
Matt: It really does.
I would also say that, so his, in-game spoiler alert, love of
life ended up being, uh, Anya.
Who is,
Alison: Anya!
Matt: Who is, a demon, right?
What was Anya?
She was not mortal.
Alison: Yeah, she'd been around since the beginning of time.
She was some kind of
Matt: yeah, in human
form.
Alison: I think, yeah, she'd been feeding off souls
Matt: But that, but it's interesting to me because, they're showing correlation
between ADHD and autism these days, right?
Like that there are some connections ,there're overlaps.
There are there's spectrums of ADHD, there's spectrums of, of autism.
And Um, to me, no joke.
Uh, and I know she's a demon or
demons, demons,
uh, Anya is autistic, right??
There's.
Alison: No, she and Tara, Tara,
I've already forgotten are hundred percent on the spectrum
Matt: Mm-hmm Yeah.
For sure, absolute coding for that.
Alison: Well, and Anya's is because she's actually not human.
So of course like human communication and interaction, is actually foreign to her.
Matt: Mm-hmm.
And take that as you will.
In 2022, you know, looking back and going.
Okay.
So somebody who's coded with autism is actually a demon.
Alison: Not what we're saying.
Not
Matt: Without, without any.
Yeah.
Not what we're saying.
But there is, you know, there's this episode called The Body.
Um, and there's plenty of examples of, of Anya being this way.
And, I think that her, her inability to have human emotion, you know,
let's just call it human emotion.
Right.
It is what, what her challenge was, um, but it really like people point
to this episode, The Body, which is one of my, my favorite shows and I
little personal side note, I saw The Body, uh, before I had seen any other
episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
I saw it.
Yeah.
And I, I was like, yeah, okay.
I didn't get the show.
I didn't get the episode.
I didn't understand anything.
But flash forward, sadly or short few years later, I had all the
context because my, my dad had died.
Anybody that's lost a parent, watch The Body again.
It is a very, it's a very heartfelt episode.
It's a very sad episode.
Joss Whedon had just lost his mom and that's he put that, put all of that into
the show, but there are little things about that episode that are so amazing.
If you are someone who understands, you know, I don't want you to understand
of course, but if you've lost a parent and you watch that episode,
there's so much stuff in that episode.
That's like what, like, one of the things that I always bring up is Buffy's mom
is, you know, they have to get her to the hospital and she's dead and sorry,
again, spoiler alert, but hopefully, you know, that was 98 y'all so, you know.
Uh, she picks up the telephone and for no reason, the, the buttons
of the phone are suddenly like unreadable and enormous, right?
Like she can't like, she can't do it.
She can't dial.
Right.
And also the amazing thing is like the whole episode, pretty
much from the view of Buffy.
She cannot look anyone in the eyes.
So the camera stops pretty much right below anyone's gaze, right?
Pretty much at the chin.
All of the people that come in, like the ambulance people, her friends,
it's just, I'm getting chills thinking about it now because it's, you
know, when I got the call, uh, that dad was in the hospital just that
heightened sense of lack of sense.
I mean, you just, these things start shutting down in your brain,
but that's exactly what I mean.
I couldn't see anybody I was in Atlanta all the way from there to the
airport to, Vermont, where he was.
And all, all the things become so impossible to do all the little,
things that you take for granted, like paying for something or
anyway, in the heightened moment.
It's really amazing.
At the end of that episode, this demon Anya is, uh, asking all these
questions of, of Xander and Willow.
And she's asking questions like, well, are we going to see the body?
Are we going to see, is she going to be, you know, lying down?
You know, she's asking all these questions that sound so insensitive,
you know, maybe someone who just doesn't have that filter of, of like,
I don't know, social norms and that's, that's what Xander and Willow play.
Like, what are you saying, please?
You can't ask those questions.
I mean, she's like, I don't remember what she actually says, but I just,
just these questions that you go.
Oof.
Yikes.
And she's just asking them and then finally Willow blows up at
her and she just, she's like, well,
i, I don't understand.
No one is explaining this to me.
No one is helping me through this.
I'm never gonna say hello to her again.
I'm never going to, watch her, you know, walk across the street again,
all these different, all these little things and, it's really sweet.
It's very, very sweet, but it is something I think, that if, processing emotion,
processing experiences in that way were more challenging to you, these are things
that, that, you know, somebody might ask.
So I loved it.
I loved that.
So I wonder, I wonder if that's, that's another thing that they were going,
they were, they were doing is they had the ADHD kid with, with someone that
would maybe give him some patience or give him some, you know, to try
to slow him down, to try to say, you know, because if you have ADHD, maybe
you're all emotion, everything's pure emotion, the good, the bad, all of it.
Alison: And I think that that's true across any neuro divergent spectrum
is a lot of times that things that are perceived as, uh, socially incompetent
we'll call it is, is usually that person just trying to understand and being
perceived in a hurtful or incorrect way.
Matt: Hell.
Yes.
Hell yes.
You know, once again, that is why I am glad we're doing this podcast.
I'm glad that, there are doctors that care about this now and there are therapists
and coaches and people talking about it because, think about all the people that
we grew up with that were just weird.
Right?
I,
Alison: I remember the first time that someone, um, talking about their son
summarized autism, as you, you take a hole, the size of a pinhole and you
try and shove all of the light that we all experience through a very large
frame through that little tiny pinhole.
Like, how would you feel if everything was being kind of focused on you
in a very, very narrow path, but still the same amount, you know?
And, you know, I probably had been mean and rude and why are they
weird and why they act like that?
And once somebody kind of put it in those terms of like, yeah, I'd probably not
react physically or emotionally well, too, if I had light and sound traveling to me
through a different, more narrow path.
So
Matt: And for us, maybe it's, take normal light and then like turn
up the brightness, the gain, the,
the
contrast, put a disco
Alison: and reflecting
Matt: and then,
Alison: yeah.
Matt: Uh, well this was super fun.
I thought, I don't know.
It was fun to step out, step out and, and try something new.
Alison: Yeah.
I feel like this was the perfect discussion for me to have with you
since you were the one you with the help of our good friend, Genna Cohen
brought Buffy firmly into my life.
It, you know, I will say this, this is probably gonna surprise you.
Now I want to go rewatch.
like
Matt: No, it doesn't surprise me at all.
Mm-hmm I was like,
oh,
Alison: oh,
Oh,
Um, thank you for having this weird little chat with me.
Thank you, listeners of ADHd20 for tuning in to listen to two people who are not in
any way qualified to diagnose a cucumber.
Uh
Matt: Nope.
Alison: And we are talking about made up people, um, and what we think their,
um, afflictions and otherwise might be
Matt: I dunno.
Cuz it's fun and it's therapeutic and it's harmless and I don't know if people, if
people end up listening to this episode a lot, maybe we'll do more of these.
Alison: If there is a cast that you want to, join the conversation,
um, about please let us know.
Matt: Someday.
We'll get somebody who could, who could actually actually diagnose
and that'll be really fun.
We'll do
Alison: Yeah,
Matt: Um, yeah.
Thanks you guys for joining us and thank you for supporting us.
And we do have a Patreon as, as per requirement for podcasters
and and nerds all across the land.
Alison: Thanks to our little Discord family.
Matt: Thank
Alison: Thank you, Matt, for hating on Ross and, and, and...
Matt: and starting this anytime.
Anytime.
Alison: With your Ross Gellar haterade.
Matt: Any time.
And until next time, my friend, you.
Alison: Yay.
Matt: Yay.