Speaker 1: Welcome back.
Speaker 2: The reason I do my surprise.
Speaker 1: Waukee too is that might go on. What's going on?
Speaker 1: Is it happen a stroke?
Speaker 2: Oh my god?
Speaker 1: Birdlisticless maam Kevin Smith, Quin Smith easiest mark in the world.
Speaker 1: The You couldn't be around fucking turkeys, bro, because that's
Speaker 1: all they do. I feel particularly laughed at the insulting them,
Speaker 1: even though you didn't truly mean it. Okay, ah we
Speaker 1: the past is the president and the president of the
Speaker 1: future or the past.
Speaker 2: No past, the past is the future, in the future
Speaker 2: is the past passes. You can throw a president in
Speaker 2: there if you want.
Speaker 1: The future. In the future is past. But we're in
Speaker 1: the present. But our present is their past.
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, our president is their future and this.
Speaker 1: Is how we get to time. Drow are Our past
Speaker 1: is their present. As they listened to the show.
Speaker 2: Yes, this is all happened to us is the present.
Speaker 1: So number one, just to let you know where we
Speaker 1: are in time. The Dogma the Resurrection tour kicked off
Speaker 1: last night in Los Angeles. We'll talk about that in
Speaker 1: a minute, but Harley gave me a wax stick. Those
Speaker 1: watching along at home at that Kevin Smith Club dot com.
Speaker 1: Uh it looks like a little little deodorant. It's called dart.
Speaker 1: The palmade stick and it's meant to keep my hair
Speaker 1: from doing the ship because my kid cannot be bothered
Speaker 1: to be like hat.
Speaker 2: I just though I don't. Sometimes I don't want to
Speaker 2: interrupt you and.
Speaker 1: You're on a roll. I think what happens is you
Speaker 1: become like fucking entranced by it. It looks like how
Speaker 1: stupid it look?
Speaker 2: Wow?
Speaker 1: I wish I could just tell him, but I can't.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna let him be stupid hair?
Speaker 2: Well, my dad looks what don't be like that?
Speaker 1: I'm sharing? Where can it be married? One day? I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: what's up? My dear hair looks stupid today? Christ?
Speaker 2: What got me puff? Don't you invoke the Lord and.
Speaker 1: You gotta puff like dogma?
Speaker 2: He did? He loved it.
Speaker 1: He left me a message where he was like, I
Speaker 1: really liked biblical avengers.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what he kept saying. People like that's your
Speaker 2: Marvel movie. That's right, you've never seen it. I've never
Speaker 2: seen it.
Speaker 1: So we have the fucking is my hair holding?
Speaker 2: So far as the watch I was doing? Great?
Speaker 1: Problem is it feels like there's wax on my head.
Speaker 2: Ship you can't get it.
Speaker 1: If you put a wick in there, I could burn
Speaker 1: for hours as a votive. So we have the premiere
Speaker 1: at the Grove. Back in the day when you called
Speaker 1: movie Phone and mister movie Phone would read you the times.
Speaker 1: You know, when you want to go to a movie,
Speaker 1: he would say Pacific the Grove showtimes one pm, three
Speaker 1: forty five, five, thirty six, eighteen. You know, he always
Speaker 1: varied it. So we've been going to that theater for
Speaker 1: a while. We had the tour kicked off there. That
Speaker 1: was the first place, and we had two screenings and
Speaker 1: they put up a little like step and repeat and
Speaker 1: shit like that. Even though it wasn't like a premiere.
Speaker 1: It was just the first show. But since some people
Speaker 1: were in town like me and Jay, they were look,
Speaker 1: let's put up the thing. So the kid went to
Speaker 1: the first show. Now, the last time we had a
Speaker 1: and again this wasn't a premiere, but last time we
Speaker 1: had a Dogma premiere or the first time actually was it? No,
Speaker 1: it was after Can. Yeah, we went to Can first.
Speaker 1: Second time we showed the films at the New York
Speaker 1: Film Festival. That's where like we got out of the
Speaker 1: car with baby Harley. She was wearing angel wings and stuff,
Speaker 1: and there were a thousand protesters, like just praying the rosary,
Speaker 1: had us holding a big statue of Mary and stuff.
Speaker 1: They were not happy about Dogma playing there. So with
Speaker 1: Dogma returning to our lives, it's taken on something of
Speaker 1: a personal turn for Jennifer because she's like that's how
Speaker 1: ever released tip began. I becamogna.
Speaker 2: She's very sent me.
Speaker 1: Very cent, which is in truth, rarely is she sentimental.
Speaker 1: It may be a thing that's changing with and I'll
Speaker 1: say it in this room but never again age. But yes,
Speaker 1: is she You know, I'm not saying she's cold hearted,
Speaker 1: but she's not sentimental. She's not. She doesn't take nostalgic
Speaker 1: walks down you know memory. She doesn't like, you know,
Speaker 1: go out of her way to keep all the friends
Speaker 1: that she had when she was also in grade or
Speaker 1: high school. Like I mean, do I well in that
Speaker 1: way or just like your mom? Oh lord, but I
Speaker 1: mean it makes sense. Part of you has to be
Speaker 1: like your mom.
Speaker 2: I I see, I've clocked a few, uh, and that
Speaker 2: could be one similarities that could be one.
Speaker 1: And you didn't have like a fun high school experience.
Speaker 1: I don't know what her excuse was, because she seemed
Speaker 1: to be like she loved high school yeah, and cheerleader
Speaker 1: and shit like that. But you're you also won't have
Speaker 1: a probably not even twenty years from now, you'd be like,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm rethinking, Archer, Mmm, won't happened if
Speaker 1: anything with distance would become more bitter.
Speaker 2: I've become more bitter by the day. I pass it
Speaker 2: sometimes and I cry, Do you really Yeah? I surely
Speaker 2: cry so much because I want to go back so bad?
Speaker 1: Do you really like cry like I've literally.
Speaker 2: Passed it and started to cry.
Speaker 1: With relief or in memory of like, oh.
Speaker 2: That fucking place, in memory of oh this fucking place.
Speaker 1: Why wouldn't it be more relief since you never have
Speaker 1: to go back to that.
Speaker 2: I have nightmares about school all the time. You serious,
Speaker 2: constant nightmares?
Speaker 1: How do they go?
Speaker 2: Then? I'm still in school?
Speaker 3: That's enough.
Speaker 2: I'm not really sums it up.
Speaker 1: You're like, I'm not being chased by an axe murder
Speaker 1: or something. I'm just literally going classic class. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck? No?
Speaker 2: I thought this was over.
Speaker 1: Such your idea of hell, like if you wound up,
Speaker 1: if there is a hell and you wind up in
Speaker 1: it and show it's just you going Archer every day? Yes, wow, yes,
Speaker 1: at least you know how to do that though.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I could navigate, but you tell something.
Speaker 1: If there's a hell, then you're there. You should be
Speaker 1: so lucky as they're like, oh, I turn out you
Speaker 1: have to go to school. No, and everyone else in
Speaker 1: hell is.
Speaker 2: Like, why is what?
Speaker 1: Can I go to Archer? Why is that a pressure?
Speaker 1: She did not like it?
Speaker 2: Oh? Well, fucking who this hell? Man?
Speaker 1: How comes she ain't getting flayed? How comes she can
Speaker 1: to keep her Fuck? It's good.
Speaker 2: People are burning and I'm just at Archer and.
Speaker 1: You're like, this is the worst life that's ever been
Speaker 1: or after life?
Speaker 2: Oh god, that place.
Speaker 1: So Harley and Austin. But let's focus on because she
Speaker 1: could speak for herself because she's here and it is
Speaker 1: her show at least half of it.
Speaker 2: Oh thank you.
Speaker 1: Has never seen Dogma never. I was never like, watch
Speaker 1: she sit down and watched this. I haven't done that
Speaker 1: with any messed up I've never been like, you gotta
Speaker 1: watch fuck Kevin Smith movies.
Speaker 2: Man. Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1: So it stands to reason that I was never like, oh,
Speaker 1: watch Dogma. But it is you know, the one that
Speaker 1: has probably aged the best. I don't know, I don't
Speaker 1: know if that's true, if it's age the best or
Speaker 1: if it's the one that's aged the best. But people
Speaker 1: sure fucking like it still, and they always regard it
Speaker 1: as like that's when he was good. What were your thoughts?
Speaker 2: Well, my thought I loved it. I really loved it.
Speaker 2: I thought the biggest standouts whereas the writing, Oh there
Speaker 2: are why.
Speaker 1: I know, the guy who had something to do you
Speaker 1: maybe have something to do with that I did.
Speaker 2: There were some beautiful speeches in there. Yeah, beautiful language.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of my logs, and I think that's
Speaker 2: something that doesn't happen as much these days in film. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and I think it's a gift. You know, actor, why
Speaker 2: thank you?
Speaker 1: And I'm sure the actors might might agree, unless you're
Speaker 1: the one having to spit out that fucking monologue and
Speaker 1: you know, like a little bit, fuck, let me start
Speaker 1: again and ship like that. But it is what I noticed,
Speaker 1: is I watched it is like the pace is it's
Speaker 1: a pace that I could never I would never do today.
Speaker 1: Like you meet almost all the players and you still
Speaker 1: don't have all the information, like you still know who's
Speaker 1: who and what's what and what's their connection? Why are
Speaker 1: we meeting all these people and stuff? And I'm not
Speaker 1: going to say like it. You know, it unfolds elegantly,
Speaker 1: but it unfolds in a way that I would never
Speaker 1: be able to. I couldn't stand today, like I would
Speaker 1: be like, oh my god, we got to get let's
Speaker 1: get moving. Why the fuck are they still like talking?
Speaker 2: How long?
Speaker 1: What is it that we watched his two hours? But
Speaker 1: Mosier he went to the second screening last night and
Speaker 1: this morning text. I was like, what do you think?
Speaker 1: And he was just like I I guess I was.
Speaker 1: I had that can cut in my head, the version
Speaker 1: that we took to the Camp Film Festival. He's gone
Speaker 1: because like it was weird to me that things were missing.
Speaker 1: He's gone, but I realized they weren't missing. That's that's
Speaker 1: how we released the movie in ninety nine. He's like,
Speaker 1: I haven't seen it in fucking years and ship, but
Speaker 1: he had in his head other elements or other scenes
Speaker 1: that went away. First cut of the movie was like
Speaker 1: four hours. Oh my god, I got down to three
Speaker 1: really shous two and a half. So I think the
Speaker 1: one we took four hours fifteen. Yeah, that was young.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, it could work for four hours just
Speaker 2: an important movie. Now you're like an hour and a
Speaker 2: half or bust hour and a half, like a fourth
Speaker 2: third movie.
Speaker 1: First Cup seventy two minutes. They were like, it's not
Speaker 1: legally a movie unless you add like six more minutes.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh so yeah. Watching it last night,
Speaker 1: I was like, man, it's not like men. It's as slow,
Speaker 1: but it does take its time giving all the information,
Speaker 1: but it works trust the audience. That young Keev trusted
Speaker 1: the audience a lot more than current cav and not
Speaker 1: that I'm like the oh it is just fucking stupid,
Speaker 1: but clearly that guy was like, they'll follow it, and
Speaker 1: you know now with experience, I'm like, we better move
Speaker 1: or maybe it's just story. The way we consume stories
Speaker 1: is completely different now, and you're the patience is far lower,
Speaker 1: like get to the point because we you know, everyone's
Speaker 1: been tiktokified and shit, so you can't get that point
Speaker 1: across like immediate lansha, you're in trouble. So I'm curious
Speaker 1: to see how it plays for folks who have never
Speaker 1: seen it before, and near one of them.
Speaker 2: So many wonderful performances.
Speaker 1: Did it feel like, come on, what's the point or
Speaker 1: did it feel no, no.
Speaker 2: What's what's the point?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: I feel like the point was really clear.
Speaker 1: You weren't raised in any faith, though, so I wasn't.
Speaker 1: Does the movie still work for somebody who has no
Speaker 1: sense of Catechism?
Speaker 2: Absolutely?
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think I could absolutely understand your point of view
Speaker 2: in what you were trying to say, and I didn't.
Speaker 2: I didn't understand why it was so offensive to people.
Speaker 1: Oh you know, what did they say that? I remember
Speaker 1: there was a guy being interviewed and he was like, oh,
Speaker 1: it was a Bill o'donni, the head of the Catholic League,
Speaker 1: And they were the ones that went after Bill Donnie,
Speaker 1: who was an older gentleman. I don't know if he's
Speaker 1: still run, but he headed up an organization called the
Speaker 1: Catholic League, a self appointed body of religious watchdogs that
Speaker 1: looked at movies and TV shows and raised ire if
Speaker 1: there was a depiction of faith or religion, or particularly
Speaker 1: the Catholic Church that they didn't agree with. So we
Speaker 1: were ripe for them. We were. They were, you know,
Speaker 1: standing by the fact that we had like bad language
Speaker 1: in it, the fact that I had made clerks and
Speaker 1: mal rats and.
Speaker 2: Chasing monster in it.
Speaker 1: It's it's not to be.
Speaker 2: Taken so seriously. There are some beautiful ideas. I love.
Speaker 2: I love speaking of ideas. Believe yeah, I love love
Speaker 2: that line. I thought there were some really profound statements,
Speaker 2: and I didn't think it was like fuck, because for religion,
Speaker 2: it's very it's it's not it's it's very much. I
Speaker 2: don't know it's celebrating the right word, but acknowledging.
Speaker 1: It's definitely a celebration of faith, and you know, pokes
Speaker 1: at the foibles of the institution. Mm hm, you know.
Speaker 1: And that's par for the course of any fucking satire
Speaker 1: or even comedy. It's like, you know, go after the
Speaker 1: big guy, and big business is a target for some people,
Speaker 1: big religion as a target for others. I wasn't like,
Speaker 1: you know, if you watch Monty Python's Life of Brian,
Speaker 1: like they were like, how much more can we offend?
Speaker 1: And I wasn't even that guy. I wasn't like I
Speaker 1: want to offend somebody. I just found a rich tapestry
Speaker 1: that I'd been raised in my entire life on which
Speaker 1: I could weave this additional you know, kind of cosmology
Speaker 1: of like, oh, there are angels and they talk like us,
Speaker 1: and you know Jane, they know who Jane and sound
Speaker 1: about is like the movie is goofy as fuck, but
Speaker 1: at its heart, it's that's the last vestiges of my
Speaker 1: dying faith. That's me writing it all down before the
Speaker 1: fucking world ends around me, because I you know, that
Speaker 1: was me struggling with my faith at that point, like
Speaker 1: suddenly I was having a crisis of faith where it's
Speaker 1: like all the shit I used to believe in, I
Speaker 1: don't believe in it anymore. Why.
Speaker 2: I think that's it's really clear and probably really relatable
Speaker 2: for a lot of people who struggle with their faith.
Speaker 2: But I think it's very evident that it was written
Speaker 2: by somebody who is a Catholic or was a Catholic.
Speaker 2: I think it's so it's just really interesting to me
Speaker 2: that it's like that people got so offended because there's
Speaker 2: so much in there. There's no way that somebody who
Speaker 2: wasn't Catholic could write that. There's so there's so much
Speaker 2: information in there. Also, like there were I mean there
Speaker 2: were references that like I didn't get because I don't
Speaker 2: I didn't grow up Catholic because I I am not
Speaker 2: so familiar with the uh said Bible.
Speaker 1: But I have been in your bedroom. You have a
Speaker 1: bedside table. That's where your Bible goes. When you get
Speaker 1: into bed. You can read a few passages before you
Speaker 1: go sleep.
Speaker 2: That's good advice. So I'll get on that. Yeah, King James,
Speaker 2: all right, noted.
Speaker 1: But I don't want to walk in that room and
Speaker 1: see the Satanic Bible there. I'm talking the Bible, the
Speaker 1: Good Book, as they say.
Speaker 2: Of course, of course I gotta get familiar with it.
Speaker 1: The Biblical Avengers, as Puff.
Speaker 2: Might say it. It really was, though, like the Biblical.
Speaker 1: You a copy of Biblical Avengers and it's the Bible.
Speaker 2: He's like, it's a graphic novel, Puff, But there are
Speaker 2: no pictures. It's a novel. Did I have to picture?
Speaker 1: How great is that cast?
Speaker 2: Oh? My god? Stellar? Right? Absolutely stellar? Alan Rickman could watch,
Speaker 2: could watch for days, could watch for a lifetime. He's
Speaker 2: he's so good.
Speaker 1: Yeah he is, Dogma. He melted into that movie like
Speaker 1: he was supposed to be part of the recipe.
Speaker 2: Literally, like so pleasant to watch. Jay fucking hilarious, laughed
Speaker 2: out loud so many times.
Speaker 1: Steals the goddamn show.
Speaker 2: He really fucking killed it.
Speaker 1: That moment that movie like allows everything else, you know,
Speaker 1: Jane solambob shrug back and everything Jane slambab oriented since
Speaker 1: Dogma has all been predicated on, like that killer performance.
Speaker 2: He really he brought it.
Speaker 1: He did. He rose to the occasion.
Speaker 2: So did you. And you were a little cutie in
Speaker 2: that and your baby dad baby.
Speaker 1: I it's yeah, it was crazy. As I was watching
Speaker 1: the movie last night, I was like, Wow, there's not
Speaker 1: a single line in any of our faces, like because
Speaker 1: we're all young. Oh and then I turned to look
Speaker 1: at Jay and you know lines you'd appreciate that. He
Speaker 1: looks fucking great for his age. But we're all like
Speaker 1: getting old.
Speaker 2: So baby and so baby.
Speaker 1: Literally baby with like baby cheeks and stuff.
Speaker 2: Like Matt and Ben so baby.
Speaker 1: Matt and Ben post good Will hunting the first thing
Speaker 1: they did after Goodwele hunting really and then before they
Speaker 1: head off to well, I mean, while we're shooting the movie,
Speaker 1: they win the Oscar.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so yeah, they're like Ben and Matt at the
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say that I was at the absolute height
Speaker 1: of my game, not my game, but just like I
Speaker 1: don't know, like at the same time, like Jane something.
Speaker 1: This is weird to say, but Jane Soladbop Strike Back
Speaker 1: may have been the apex in terms of like we
Speaker 1: were just coming off of Clerks, but mall right, somebody liked.
Speaker 1: But then chasing him in Dogma Won two Punch and
Speaker 1: people were like, he's legit and shit like that. So
Speaker 1: when we went to cast Jane some Above Shark Back,
Speaker 1: like we met with everybody. Christine Cheks brought fucking all
Speaker 1: of Hollywood, and we met with Matthew McConaughey really yeah,
Speaker 1: which is like, there's nothing for Matthew mcconne this dogging movie.
Speaker 1: But there could have been, like you know, at the
Speaker 1: end of the day. But it was crazy how many
Speaker 1: people we met with. And it was not because they
Speaker 1: were like, I want to be in Jane some about
Speaker 1: Shark Back. It was all because of like Chasing Amy
Speaker 1: and Dogma, They're like, well, the next thing he's going,
Speaker 1: I mean, this guy's on a roll fucking And then
Speaker 1: the next thing I did was Jane Soundboch Shark Back,
Speaker 1: which for a movie, I love it too, and it
Speaker 1: aged insanely well when it came out. It did financially
Speaker 1: well and stuff, but there was a sense of like,
Speaker 1: oh well, it's no Dogma like this, And then I
Speaker 1: followed it up a Jersey girl and they're like, oh
Speaker 1: well this is like fucking TV movie bullshit and whatnot.
Speaker 1: So I lost them there a lot of people.
Speaker 2: Dogma was very profound because it was full of statements
Speaker 2: and also so ahead of its time. Was so much
Speaker 2: of what you were saying, Yeah, maybe there were so
Speaker 2: many things that I was like, yeah, you go, dad.
Speaker 1: That's the thing. Maybe like back then I was ahead
Speaker 1: of the times, you know, and now I'm just struggling
Speaker 1: to keep up with the times you were.
Speaker 2: You were so ahead of the times there. It was.
Speaker 2: It felt very relevant watching it today. It didn't seem.
Speaker 1: Like like oh my god, this old timey boy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there weren't things I was like, oh fuck it.
Speaker 2: There was like one or two things that I was like,
Speaker 2: ah fuck, But I was expecting a lot more right
Speaker 2: from a nine. Yes, it could have been so, it
Speaker 2: could have been so much more problematic, but it was you.
Speaker 1: Got understand me rushing out.
Speaker 2: Movie Hall. But there were so many moments where I
Speaker 2: was like, I'm so proud of him. He's so ahead
Speaker 2: of hate time, and it's weird.
Speaker 1: It's like, I, you know, it never occurred to me
Speaker 1: to like sit you down and make you watch it.
Speaker 1: But when Jen was like, oh, this is the first
Speaker 1: time she's gonna be saying and I was like, on that,
Speaker 1: I really don't want to know what she thinks.
Speaker 2: It made me so proud. It really made me so proud.
Speaker 1: You made me fucking crust.
Speaker 2: It made me be like, my dad is so smart
Speaker 2: or was was so smart.
Speaker 1: I could never do that movie again.
Speaker 2: Why because I don't because you're in a different place.
Speaker 2: But I think you could.
Speaker 1: Asked me last night. They were like, how are you
Speaker 1: gonna do a dog and sequel? That movie was made
Speaker 1: by guy who believed it all, and I've been very
Speaker 1: upfront about like, well, I don't believe that anymore. So
Speaker 1: Dogma hits a lot of people who were raised the
Speaker 1: way I was raised, So there's a a certain not
Speaker 1: a universality to it. But fuck the plot, Fuck the stars,
Speaker 1: fuck the actors. Something at the core of that movie
Speaker 1: is ingrained to them as it was me, Like drive
Speaker 1: to church every Sunday morning and shit like it's a
Speaker 1: spoken secret language. And most lapsed Catholics have a very
Speaker 1: you know, it fraught relationship with their former faith, you know,
Speaker 1: because it's never just like oh yeah I speak ethic,
Speaker 1: but you know, it's like, oh the fucking they indoctrinate
Speaker 1: you in that fucking thing and shit. Once people quote
Speaker 1: unquote get free and whatnot. But even if you get
Speaker 1: free quote unquote it that's they've had you since childhood.
Speaker 1: So their shit you'll never get rid of. I'm still
Speaker 1: afraid of going to hell, even though I.
Speaker 2: Know there is none that's so interesting.
Speaker 1: They do a good My mother Mamily seventy nine head
Speaker 1: toward eighty, you know, has stopped going to church because
Speaker 1: for mostly for health reasons and stuff like that. They
Speaker 1: still bring our communion and shit at home, but you know,
Speaker 1: has gotten to a place where she was like maybe
Speaker 1: I you know, I don't know how much of this
Speaker 1: I believe it. Once again, well, her faith is a
Speaker 1: faith that her parents heap done her and be like
Speaker 1: this is what we believe, and this is what you believe,
Speaker 1: and shit, and you're never told to question like, here's
Speaker 1: your religion. Do you have any questions? And be like, well,
Speaker 1: why can God make up boulder so big even he
Speaker 1: can't lift it? Stop saying that shit, you know, and
Speaker 1: that's where dogma comes from.
Speaker 2: It was impactful for me watching it, so I can
Speaker 2: only imagine what it would feel like for somebody who
Speaker 2: did grow a Catholic and how seen they would feel. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and that that's really special. I think you made something
Speaker 2: that a lot of people have and will continue to
Speaker 2: feel seen by.
Speaker 1: But thank you for that. That means the world. But
Speaker 1: in doing a sequel, I don't think I can do
Speaker 1: that again. I could bring back the characters, and I
Speaker 1: could do a fucking very clever story and shit which
Speaker 1: will make people go like, ah, I see, And once
Speaker 1: we get past the clever concept, I just got to
Speaker 1: make sure the movie holds all the way through as
Speaker 1: a three act story.
Speaker 2: And I think it's really interesting that you're coming at
Speaker 2: it from a different perspective now, from a different place
Speaker 2: in your life. I think people will also relate to
Speaker 2: that because there are also people who are now in
Speaker 2: your position, who are past the faith phase of their
Speaker 2: life and are in a new spot. So I think
Speaker 2: I think it will be really interesting issus sided.
Speaker 1: The thing is that movie was hopeful, and the older
Speaker 1: I get, you just gotta it's harder to manufacture. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but you know what, that's literally the only thing I'm
Speaker 1: good for, so I can't crap out on it and
Speaker 1: not do it. Like sometimes I'm like, man, I wish
Speaker 1: I was just done. But you know, until I'm done done,
Speaker 1: until the world is absolutely until life is done with me,
Speaker 1: the only reason I'm here is to give people that
Speaker 1: that distraction that oh I feel seen, that momentary respite
Speaker 1: from the you know, ever battling hopelessness and hopefulness that
Speaker 1: living for more than thirty years on planet Earth does.
Speaker 1: Too older I get the more I realized, we were
Speaker 1: never meant to last this fucking long, and we're only
Speaker 1: lasting longer. And shit, and if you last longer, you
Speaker 1: have to continue working and you know, to pay for
Speaker 1: bills and all that makes me. I wish I was like,
Speaker 1: I wish Momily was fucking rich. Man. I wish I
Speaker 1: was one of them trust fun babies and ship, I
Speaker 1: wish you were a trust fun baby, because would borrow
Speaker 1: money from you.
Speaker 2: I wish Momily was rich too. It's all her fault, Momily.
Speaker 2: Come on, she didn't work hardly. Come on, man, are.
Speaker 1: You fucking kidding me? My mother did not My mother
Speaker 1: created me absolutely, but sometimes when you're a parent, you
Speaker 1: create things that you don't intend to create in your kid,
Speaker 1: as we all know. And how she conducted her life
Speaker 1: as like, well that's well, that's how you do it,
Speaker 1: because that was the example I always had. And Momily's
Speaker 1: life is about service constantly, just what do you need?
Speaker 1: How can I help?
Speaker 2: How can it sounds like someone else, I know, how can.
Speaker 1: I, Oh, let me take care of that. Oh, okay,
Speaker 1: we're doing We're.
Speaker 2: Gonna Yeah, it sounds a little familiar.
Speaker 1: Yeah, from her, she cares a lot, and you know,
Speaker 1: I care a lot too because of Momily.
Speaker 2: And it's a really beautiful thing.
Speaker 1: How it is just get you in trouble sometimes and
Speaker 1: then sometimes you just wish, for your heart's sake, that
Speaker 1: you didn't care so much because.
Speaker 2: It's hard to care. It is. It's a lot easier
Speaker 2: to live in ignorance or to not acknowledge what's going on,
Speaker 2: but it's it's a beautiful thing to care. Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: why we're vegan. Well, actually you were forced to go vegan.
Speaker 2: That's why I'm vegan.
Speaker 1: I mean now I'm absolutely like if somebody was like,
Speaker 1: hey man, you could eat meat and animal products now
Speaker 1: until the day you died, it won't affect your health.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't go back so proud because at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, while I wasn't like an ethical vegan,
Speaker 1: somebody was like, well, I just don't want to hurt
Speaker 1: a thing, even far a wife enough from it. And
Speaker 1: it's just like.
Speaker 2: You don't need it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if I could do without, now, you know, very
Speaker 1: why is ass on the Planet's like put you're killing
Speaker 1: and eating plants and they're living things, aren't they?
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I will grapple with that somewhere down the road,
Speaker 1: but in a world of like, you know, I can't
Speaker 1: do no harm, but do as little harm as you can. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'll need a plant based product than.
Speaker 2: Facts.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it's not even like you know, if I
Speaker 1: was given the fucking magic wand like you can eat
Speaker 1: it all, I'd be like, I'm okay, Like I like
Speaker 1: the foods that I actually eat.
Speaker 2: So proud of you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you had a lot to do with that.
Speaker 2: But anyways, Yeah, Lance Moore said, is God as right,
Speaker 2: absolutely stands and ship so cute, absolutely perfect casting. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but I do really think I loved so many things
Speaker 2: about the movie, and everything was very impressive the story
Speaker 2: or that the performances, the directing. But I do really
Speaker 2: think I was. I was very blown away by the writing.
Speaker 1: In in the I mean.
Speaker 2: You've seen the other movies I made, Yes, So.
Speaker 1: You're saying this is more well written than the other movies, Well,
Speaker 1: we're d more dnse more. I guess it's the creative
Speaker 1: It goes all over place. Most of the other stuff
Speaker 1: I do is like a snapshot of real life. This
Speaker 1: was about this is the Wizard of Oz, where you know,
Speaker 1: Dorothy goes on a fucking journey and ship like that,
Speaker 1: and in place of fantasy fantasy characters, we use biblical
Speaker 1: giants and stuff. Uh so, yeah, I mean definitely like
Speaker 1: the most ambitious thing I ever wrote, would that be right?
Speaker 1: Clerk's marsac Amy nearly as ambitious as talk, I would say, so, yeah.
Speaker 1: Jane Sonabob strike Back has ambition to it as well.
Speaker 1: It's big in a different way altogether, but its ideas
Speaker 1: aren't big. Cheersey Girl, no clerks to know.
Speaker 2: I mean, Tusk was pretty ambitious, but yeah, facts, there's facts.
Speaker 1: These are These are ambitious movies as well, just not
Speaker 1: in the same way Dogma was, like, you know, stuffing
Speaker 1: one hundred pounds of shit into a fucking ten pounds bag. Like,
Speaker 1: we could have used more money to tell that story,
Speaker 1: but we did it for ten millions. A ten million
Speaker 1: dollar movie.
Speaker 2: Really, that movie.
Speaker 1: Costs less than Jane Zambob Reboot. No, the exact same
Speaker 1: as Jane Son Bob Reboot.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, half of Jane Sam Bob strike Back. Oh we
Speaker 1: got more money. I was telling you I was of
Speaker 1: my powers after Dogma.
Speaker 2: Damn.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're giving me like twenty million dollars and shit.
Speaker 2: I think. Uh. The writing also stands out when being.
Speaker 1: Delivered by standout performers.
Speaker 2: Mister Allan Rick, I mean, yes, just absolutely gorgeous.
Speaker 1: Talk about somebody who he didn't execute. He fucking elevated
Speaker 1: every syllable of this shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was that was really good. That was really
Speaker 2: really good. Is this what in your app inside?
Speaker 1: Kids? Well, let's quench that thirst little holy water, and
Speaker 1: that holy water is Dogma the Resurrection Man. You can
Speaker 1: go see it on tour. I'm still on tour right now,
Speaker 1: even though I'm having this conversation with you, because we
Speaker 1: recorded this in the past, and the past is the future,
Speaker 1: in the future is the past, and Dogma hits theaters
Speaker 1: everywhere June fifth. I'm trying to think of no, because
Speaker 1: I finished the tour, so we'll be back to doing
Speaker 1: shows week of by the time the movie goes wide. Yes,
Speaker 1: but for now, you can see it on the road
Speaker 1: with me. Kids. Come to the Resurrection store tickets at
Speaker 1: dogminmovie dot com. I want you to pull three questions
Speaker 1: from your list. Okay, take us out of there. I
Speaker 1: have a hard time talking about the things I do
Speaker 1: for a long period of time unless I'm being paid
Speaker 1: to do it in a Q and A format. It's
Speaker 1: somebody you know once said that it sounds bragging shit,
Speaker 1: So I.
Speaker 2: Was like, I you know, I don't. I mean, it
Speaker 2: was a it was a big moment. Last night it
Speaker 2: was It's a really big moment, and I'm very excited
Speaker 2: for you. He's stweeny exciting.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 2: It's a really big deal and it felt very special
Speaker 2: to be able to see it in his theater.
Speaker 1: Jay last night was like, you know, I've never seen
Speaker 1: this in a theater really, And I was like, and
Speaker 1: I thought back to the times, and it was like
Speaker 1: that tracks tracks.
Speaker 2: But he still didn't see it because he left.
Speaker 1: He did he has got you know, not one, but
Speaker 1: two kids, so Jordan should have been there. She worked
Speaker 1: like crazy to make all this happen and shit, but
Speaker 1: somebody had to watch the kids. She was saying this morning,
Speaker 1: and she, you know, she was like, maybe I should
Speaker 1: have gotten a babysitter. I was like, yeah, yeah, but
Speaker 1: it was Easter Sunday. We inconveniently kicked off our tour there,
Speaker 1: so tough to get a babysitter on Easter Sunday.
Speaker 2: That's true. There's always the Burbank show, yes.
Speaker 1: And also jam I go to like San Francisco as well.
Speaker 1: Oh Nice, which is on sale and selling very well
Speaker 1: that I'll sell out very soon as well.
Speaker 2: I was laughing out loud at Jay so many times.
Speaker 1: He's fucking brilliant in that movie. I mean, I told
Speaker 1: the crowd last night. But like when we showed the
Speaker 1: movie at the New York Film Festival at Alice Tully Hall,
Speaker 1: Jay was there for you know, the red carpet ship,
Speaker 1: and then he got hammered and fucked off and shit,
Speaker 1: never came back for the movie and didn't get back
Speaker 1: for the Q and A. So we're standing sitting up
Speaker 1: on the Alice Tully stage. You know, behind this long
Speaker 1: table and it's the entire cast, like Rickman's there, Mat
Speaker 1: bat Men and Matt Ben and Matt Rock, Howard Schure,
Speaker 1: who did the score, was there, Me Mos, Salma, Linda,
Speaker 1: although I don't know if Linda state human. She was
Speaker 1: there for the premiere, but everybody basically up there and
Speaker 1: somebody asks a question and Matt goes, look before we
Speaker 1: go anywhere. I just want to acknowledge that, like Jason
Speaker 1: Muse stole that entire fucking movie from some of the
Speaker 1: most famous people in the world sitting up here right now,
Speaker 1: and you know, everyone applauded and shit. But he wasn't
Speaker 1: there to hear it, but he he was. Matt called
Speaker 1: it man, that guy. He fucking stole that movie.
Speaker 2: He really, he really did.
Speaker 1: Firing on all cylinders, not not like and here it's
Speaker 1: not like. And he never did it again. He always does.
Speaker 1: But prior to that too, you know, clerks were all
Speaker 1: rank amateurs and stuff. Mal rats he's still pretty green
Speaker 1: chasing Amy. He has one scene and I've got most
Speaker 1: of the heavy lifting with the monologue. That's the memorable
Speaker 1: part of that sequence. So Ogma was like ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 2: Jason mus it was his time to shine and shine.
Speaker 1: He did as the kids say, he ate he ate.
Speaker 2: Floor equals what eight?
Speaker 1: All right, what do you got? What do they want
Speaker 1: to know?
Speaker 2: And then I got all right, all al right, here's.
Speaker 1: A here I cannot see anymore.
Speaker 2: I'm like, looking, you need glasses so bad.
Speaker 1: I used to wear them fucking willingly, and now I'm like,
Speaker 1: you really need glasses.
Speaker 2: And he's looking through his phone camera to look at
Speaker 2: something to enlarge it because he did.
Speaker 1: Really, I'm doing the old man'st.
Speaker 2: He's being such an old man.
Speaker 1: Used to have a little magnifiers read the paper.
Speaker 2: Do you need a monocle?
Speaker 1: Fucking monocle?
Speaker 2: If you had a monocle to your look the uh?
Speaker 1: I don't think so. I mean I could, but I
Speaker 1: can kind of see that. I would probably bust a
Speaker 1: nerve trying to hold it in place all the time,
Speaker 1: because you gotta do that, and then I would have
Speaker 1: to like never be able to gain weight, because otherwise
Speaker 1: people be like fucking peg. One of my favorite moments
Speaker 1: in cop Out is Bruce and Tracy around the beach
Speaker 1: and they're fucking staking out of house, and as they're
Speaker 1: talking about it, he starts talking about Tracy's character. Paul
Speaker 1: starts talking about the neighbor, his neighbor, Henry, whose wife
Speaker 1: is always like talking to and shit like that, and he's,
Speaker 1: you know, he fantasizes about like while fucking he's at work,
Speaker 1: they're fucking getting it on or whatever the fuck, and we, uh,
Speaker 1: there's a song playing under it which is like ridhythm
Speaker 1: is it danced and like Henry and slow mo that
Speaker 1: make an eye contact like winking and shit like that.
Speaker 1: And we cut back to like Bruce and Tracy on
Speaker 1: the beach, and you know, the music cuts all together,
Speaker 1: and Bruce says something to him and he goes, he's
Speaker 1: really that bad, and he goes Chasey goes fucking fucking
Speaker 1: Monica wearing motherfucker, And then we cut back to him
Speaker 1: to Henry, the neighbor, and he turns into camera and
Speaker 1: he had a monocle. I had a long, like fucking
Speaker 1: cigarette holder with a cigarette in it. Show like that.
Speaker 1: It was like goofy as fuck, but it was inspired
Speaker 1: by fucking Monica wearing motherfucker. That rocks Warner Brothers. The
Speaker 1: head of Warner Brothers was a guy that now heads Disney.
Speaker 1: Bob Iger, No, my bad, who was it?
Speaker 2: It's like, I feel like Bob Auger's been busy with
Speaker 2: Disney for a minute.
Speaker 1: Alan Horne, Okay, he may not run Disney at this point,
Speaker 1: but he then went to Disney later on. I believe
Speaker 1: Alan Horn ran Warner Brothers. He had this, you know,
Speaker 1: crisis of conscience where he's like, we're never promoting smoking
Speaker 1: in movies again, so there won't you won't see anyone
Speaker 1: smoking in a Warner Brothers movie unless they're a villain
Speaker 1: or something like that. Even then, they're not gonna be
Speaker 1: smoking there, maybe have a cigarette in their mouth. So
Speaker 1: our shot, you know, Henry turning with the monocle and
Speaker 1: the long cigarette holder and the lit cigarette. It wasn't
Speaker 1: even lit, just in there. They flagged that and they're like,
Speaker 1: you gotta pull that out, Like we didn't shoot another
Speaker 1: take and cigarettes isn't even lit. He's not smoking, Like
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter, no tolerance policy. So the first thing
Speaker 1: we did was cgi out the cigarette. So he just
Speaker 1: had the cigarette holder, the long cigarette holder in his mouth,
Speaker 1: which still kind of worked. And then Warner Brothers is like,
Speaker 1: I can't even have that, but he's not smoking. There's
Speaker 1: it's like having a strong on your mout. Sorry, so
Speaker 1: it's removed. So when you watch the movie, he turns
Speaker 1: he has a monocle and that's it. But really, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's got that fucking uh Henry Cavill Superman mouth from
Speaker 1: those reshoots and ship. But I love fucking Monica wearing mother.
Speaker 2: Oh you could be a monocle wearing motherfucker.
Speaker 1: You know I won't. I won't discount it. All right, Cool,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. I've worn many looks over
Speaker 1: my many eras. Yeah, I won't rule out Monica.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just wondn't rule it out quite yet.
Speaker 1: Yeah. You know then it feels like if you're rocking
Speaker 1: a Monoica, you gotta be like, right.
Speaker 2: You just gotta be the penguin.
Speaker 1: All right, ask a question? All right, this is always
Speaker 1: the hairs doing has my hair?
Speaker 2: It's going great.
Speaker 1: Hasn't moved her, hasn't.
Speaker 2: Moved, She's staying in place.
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm doing it a what is it
Speaker 1: called R and co? R and Co dart all right.
Speaker 2: It's a special gift from me to you for your tour.
Speaker 1: Thank you. I'll take it with me and I'll thank
Speaker 1: you every time I use it.
Speaker 2: Thank you, this is a this is a good one.
Speaker 1: You're a good kid, you know what.
Speaker 2: Thank you. You're a good dad. You're a great dad.
Speaker 1: I don't know how to take a compliment, so it
Speaker 1: always let's just let's just keep it on you. You're
Speaker 1: a good kid, Okay.
Speaker 2: I'll take it.
Speaker 1: Great person, good kid. You get your head on straight.
Speaker 2: I try, I try to keep it straight.
Speaker 1: You do your admirable I you know, I it sounds
Speaker 1: goofy to say, but I look up to you. I
Speaker 1: would like to manage my life the way you manage
Speaker 1: your life. You know, if somebody was like, you should
Speaker 1: take a page out of her book, I'd be like,
Speaker 1: I should, Like that's good.
Speaker 2: It's so nice.
Speaker 1: True, I'm happy with like you know, I'm happy for
Speaker 1: you because it's like, oh I should, you know, dealing
Speaker 1: with ship like everybody else. But at the same time,
Speaker 1: you you can handle it, put in its place and
Speaker 1: still do the things that make you happy. Were the
Speaker 1: things you need to do, Like you're you're doing it well,
Speaker 1: You're doing great. You don't have to dive into the question.
Speaker 2: If I could, if I could make an impact, a
Speaker 2: positive impact on people's lives, even a quarter of the
Speaker 2: impact that you've had on people's lives, I would die happy.
Speaker 1: It's nice. I'll be honest with you. Eric Crosco sent
Speaker 1: me a thing the other day and you saw and
Speaker 1: read it where the guy was like, Clerks three saved
Speaker 1: my life and years hours Like I saw that movie
Speaker 1: and Dante heart attack and stuff. Just last week I
Speaker 1: was feeling a similar way. And then I was like,
Speaker 1: well they went into the hospital in the movie, I
Speaker 1: might as walked, and sure enough you had a heart attack.
Speaker 1: And Eric Crosco is just like, bro, say what you
Speaker 1: will about your work. He's gone. But like one person
Speaker 1: that we know of is alive today because you made
Speaker 1: a movie. And I was like, I met a dude
Speaker 1: on Runyon who told me there are five people I
Speaker 1: know of who are alive today because of because of
Speaker 1: you talking about that heart attack, Like keep doing it.
Speaker 1: The dude told me on the fucking when I was
Speaker 1: walking the dogs on running and shit, He's like, they
Speaker 1: don't always remember your name is going Sometimes you know
Speaker 1: Kevin smith is he was having a heart attack, and
Speaker 1: the way he described it feels like the way I
Speaker 1: feel now. He goes. Sometimes they call you sign the Bob.
Speaker 1: Sometimes they're like, you know that guy, and sometimes they
Speaker 1: call you Kevin James. He's going, But it is always
Speaker 1: you and you being out there in the world and
Speaker 1: having talked spoken about it that brought them in. And
Speaker 1: in each instance that I was involved in, the guy
Speaker 1: said because he's an er nurse. He was like, that
Speaker 1: was the difference maker. If they hadn't seen you talk
Speaker 1: about it, they would not have come in. He's going,
Speaker 1: So keep doing it. You're saving lives, And that like
Speaker 1: meant the world to me, because you know, sometimes you
Speaker 1: read fucking bad reviews, you know, fu stupid. What am
Speaker 1: I still doing this? And then like when I watched
Speaker 1: Dogma last night, I'm like, God, it was so easy,
Speaker 1: and I was it was so easy to be good
Speaker 1: back then, Like I like, maybe I should just stop
Speaker 1: and let people remember all the old stuff and not
Speaker 1: give him new stuff to like hate on and shit
Speaker 1: like that. But you know that's silly, yeah, yeah, but
Speaker 1: those are those are the thoughts, right, Like it can't
Speaker 1: help them, like they're not mine. They are just thoughts
Speaker 1: that fucking hit me, shower shower me constantly, and I
Speaker 1: can't turn him off. And sometimes the thoughts are cool
Speaker 1: and get me places and sometimes the thoughts are fucking
Speaker 1: maple syrup and just drag me, keep me exactly where
Speaker 1: I am. But wait, what was the point of me saying,
Speaker 1: like talk to last night.
Speaker 2: Is that you've saved many lives?
Speaker 1: Yes, I have to continue because like even in the
Speaker 1: goofiest ways, like aside from like this is how I
Speaker 1: are in my living, like I know for a fact
Speaker 1: that the ship I do has fucking saved lives.
Speaker 2: A man last night told his beautiful and heartbreaking story
Speaker 2: during the Q and A that yeah, that was such
Speaker 2: a special moment that he almost took his life and
Speaker 2: he didn't because of you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, as a dude. During the Q and I said that,
Speaker 1: he was like, I wrote you a letter, but I
Speaker 1: just want to tell you, and he started break it down.
Speaker 1: I was like, hold on, I'll make it more awkward.
Speaker 1: And I went right up to him, held his hand
Speaker 1: and hit and he got reels raincoats man and talked
Speaker 1: about like not you know, almost doing it, and then
Speaker 1: I didn't do it because you're the voice in the
Speaker 1: back of my head. And he's like it a held
Speaker 1: on like shit like that. It's like it doesn't matter
Speaker 1: if I get tired. If it doesn't matter if I
Speaker 1: get like beat up every time I get up to bat,
Speaker 1: because I'm not that Kevin Smith anymore. Like those movies
Speaker 1: that people would hold that I've made recently that people
Speaker 1: would hold up against Dogmen and be like, he's not
Speaker 1: the same anymore. He's not doing the same quality work.
Speaker 1: Are the exact same movies that have saved lives. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: So it's like, as much as I'm open to criticism,
Speaker 1: it's like, yeah, I'm sorry it failed for you as
Speaker 1: a story, but I know for a fact this shit
Speaker 1: worked like way better than I was intending it to,
Speaker 1: and it did something better than fucking tell a story
Speaker 1: in some cases.
Speaker 2: Fuck a hater. You're saving lives.
Speaker 1: Yeah, But then you can't think like that too much
Speaker 1: because you get like, like, all right, calm down, you're
Speaker 1: making fucking Jane silly bobbery boot and shit like that.
Speaker 2: But that's true. That brings the positivity and joy to
Speaker 2: people's lives that make the difference, And that's that's the
Speaker 2: most impactful thing you can do, is bring joy to
Speaker 2: people's lives. And that's what you do all the time.
Speaker 2: And I want you to also take care of yourself
Speaker 2: and if you get tired, you got to give yourself
Speaker 2: a break sometimes and make sure you're taking care of
Speaker 2: yourself and eating every day and everything.
Speaker 1: The audience can't hear me nodding, but if they were
Speaker 1: watching on that Kevin Smith Club, they would watch me nodding.
Speaker 2: And just so everyone knows, I try my best to
Speaker 2: take care of this man. But him's kind of him
Speaker 2: a little difficult sometimes.
Speaker 1: Like it's not like I'm like, give me the pork.
Speaker 1: He's eating himself to death, you know.
Speaker 2: I sometimes I just you, you're the hardest working person
Speaker 2: I know, which so track like, no, it really does,
Speaker 2: though it really is.
Speaker 1: It's because it doesn't feel like work that I never feel, yeah,
Speaker 1: like it is work. I know it is. It's time consuming,
Speaker 1: and I know it pays bills, so it must be work.
Speaker 1: But at the same time, I'm always like, you know,
Speaker 1: my father had a real job, you know, fucking Rohelio
Speaker 1: who fixed our house as a real job. Pop had
Speaker 1: a real fucking job, you know what I'm saying, Like
Speaker 1: when he was a cop and ship. You know, I
Speaker 1: just I have a like I'm just I'm very fucking blessed, unfortunate,
Speaker 1: and I just want to like pass that along because
Speaker 1: my Catholic guilt doesn't allow me to enjoy it that much,
Speaker 1: because it's like, oh, why do you have this and
Speaker 1: why others do not? And you should be thankful for this,
Speaker 1: and you should share it as much as you possibly can.
Speaker 2: I think gratitude and sharing is for sure important and
Speaker 2: absolutely the way I always be grateful. But you also
Speaker 2: got to give yourself some grace. Sometimes you gotta take grace.
Speaker 2: You got to give yourself some momiy.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you got momily somewhere. It's just like I hear that.
Speaker 2: Kid's right.
Speaker 1: You gotta listen to Harley her Boyfriend's in eight Tide
Speaker 1: commercials this.
Speaker 2: Month from one to two to eight.
Speaker 1: Oh god, oh my god.
Speaker 2: He is the face of time.
Speaker 1: He's high time right now, that's what it is.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: All right, what do we got Let's take a question,
Speaker 1: get out of here.
Speaker 2: All right, this is a good one. Okay, just comes
Speaker 2: from a reader named so true. I always forget that
Speaker 2: Mermaid x ex.
Speaker 1: Spirit Mermaid x ex Spirit. Here we go.
Speaker 2: Do y'all have anxiety? It's so you know, I thought
Speaker 2: we'd just continue with the but I mean, I think
Speaker 2: I just answered this question, but it also.
Speaker 1: Clearly I have anxiety.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, but not.
Speaker 1: The garden variety kind, which is not me dismissing anybody
Speaker 1: else's anxiety, but mine is very Kevin Smith's specific, artist specific,
Speaker 1: relevancy specific.
Speaker 2: The rest of the question is, if so, how do
Speaker 2: you deal? Because like, dealing is hard man.
Speaker 1: Dealing is fucking hard man. Well, when I was in
Speaker 1: the Lonely Ben, they taught me to stay out of
Speaker 1: the past and stay out of the future and live
Speaker 1: in the present, which I try to do as much
Speaker 1: as possible. However, a lot of my job, as you've seen,
Speaker 1: like look at last night, my present is all about
Speaker 1: my past and the future.
Speaker 2: Like we're in Dogma game that is pretty complicated, actually.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And most of the stuff I do is similar
Speaker 1: to that because it's like, hey, we're making another one
Speaker 1: and it's predicated on the past because it's a James
Speaker 1: Aubab movie and we've made those before and stuff like that.
Speaker 1: So it's tough to do the thing I was instructed
Speaker 1: to do, the thing I learned to do, because my
Speaker 1: job also requires me to think about what is next
Speaker 1: at all times, because when you're done with this thing,
Speaker 1: I don't have a tradition. I don't have a career.
Speaker 1: A career or even a job is something that is
Speaker 1: there for you, unless you work for the government right now,
Speaker 1: is there for you five days a week and is
Speaker 1: dependable and you could quit it or you can be
Speaker 1: promoted and stuff like that. But my job is me
Speaker 1: and I'm self employed. And even if I make a
Speaker 1: movie that ends, so it's not like, all right, we'll
Speaker 1: see you guys next month.
Speaker 2: There is a lot of uncertainty constantly.
Speaker 1: So I you know, how does one deal with the
Speaker 1: anxiety They taught us to breathe? Yeah, like, which I
Speaker 1: get last night, Like at the premiere, I felt I
Speaker 1: kind of faints at a moment. And at one point Alessandra,
Speaker 1: who was the one that saved the movie, right, she goes,
Speaker 1: you've got to breathe, Kevin, and I was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god. She's one of those people too. She's very like,
Speaker 1: you know, like she took a middle name of Gaya
Speaker 1: because she's like the earth, so you know, she's real,
Speaker 1: like she feels she's empathic and mona. But she sounded
Speaker 1: like one of the people that I was like that
Speaker 1: would have been taking care of me when I was
Speaker 1: in see her too soon, because she was like, you
Speaker 1: just need to breathe. Breathe then, and breathe that, and
Speaker 1: I forgot. I mean that's honestly, like, sometimes you just
Speaker 1: get so preoccupied, so busy, you just forget to fucking
Speaker 1: breathe and that in post people like, that'sn't possible, because
Speaker 1: you know, it's a automatic, like you don't.
Speaker 2: The focusing on your breath brings you back.
Speaker 1: Into you to where you are. And usually the past
Speaker 1: and the future fraught with either regret or fucking anxiety,
Speaker 1: whereas the present. I'm not saying you can't be anxious
Speaker 1: in the present. That's where anxiety begins, is in the present,
Speaker 1: and we let it take us into the future. A
Speaker 1: future doesn't even exist. But staying in the present is tough,
Speaker 1: particularly at this moment in time. Yeah, so, since the
Speaker 1: president is about the pat, pat, the president is the past,
Speaker 1: and the past is also my future for the next month.
Speaker 2: It's getting a little complicated for you.
Speaker 1: And again, but no complaints, because it's like, what a
Speaker 1: wonderful gift to be able to take dog mout again.
Speaker 1: You know, I've been separated from her for so long
Speaker 1: and stuff.
Speaker 2: You should take time to reflect during this experience. Agreed
Speaker 2: a little journal would be nice. Maybe having a journal
Speaker 2: would be really nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe when I was in the fucking booby Hatch,
Speaker 1: I was writing, like in a journal.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's something.
Speaker 1: Supposed to doing this.
Speaker 2: Really lovely about writing in a journal. Yeah, I think
Speaker 2: it's it's important to take this time to reflect because
Speaker 2: it is. It is pretty. It's pretty meta, taking something
Speaker 2: from the past bringing into the future. It's trying to
Speaker 2: stay in the present. It's a lot going on.
Speaker 1: There are a lot of things.
Speaker 2: There's a lot going on for you. Yeah, it makes
Speaker 2: you think about the past. What makes you also think
Speaker 2: about your future, But meanwhile you're in the present.
Speaker 1: It's a little mind they're compounding it and making it
Speaker 1: worse by saying it over and over again. I'm like,
Speaker 1: wait a second, she's right.
Speaker 2: And just in case you haven't heard me one more time,
Speaker 2: you are fucked. I just think the most important thing
Speaker 2: for you during this next month, it's one to take
Speaker 2: care of yourself. The hair is holding. Take care of yourself.
Speaker 2: Focus on taking care of yourself so you could take
Speaker 2: care of others. Yes, do a little dance here and there.
Speaker 1: That's important.
Speaker 2: Never stop dancing. Never stop dance and keep the dance going,
Speaker 2: and take time to reflects what a special experience it is.
Speaker 1: You're right now. It's clear why I had you for
Speaker 1: this moment.
Speaker 2: You're welcome.
Speaker 1: You saved me.
Speaker 2: I do what I can.
Speaker 1: Your job here is finished. You may I'll go about
Speaker 1: the rest of your life doing whatever you like.
Speaker 2: Goodbye.
Speaker 1: Whatever happened to Harley, she was finished. I was fixed.
Speaker 1: Sure she's fixing someone else. Path, don't fucking fix me.
Speaker 2: When I met Puff that I was drawn to him
Speaker 2: because he did need fixing?
Speaker 1: Is that right?
Speaker 2: Oh? Yeah? Really he was in a really, really dark place.
Speaker 2: Do you know that? When I met Puff?
Speaker 1: Did you just hear yourself saying that loud? I realized,
Speaker 1: I call the man that I'm going to marry.
Speaker 2: Puff, I called him these days, I call him monkey
Speaker 2: monkey monkey, So Puff monkey monkey, Puff.
Speaker 1: Hey, Puff Monkey, come over here monkey.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: So when you met him, you want like I can
Speaker 1: fix pet.
Speaker 2: I just felt like something was I've.
Speaker 1: Got the key to this man a monkey.
Speaker 2: I felt an overwhelming sense of this person needs help,
Speaker 2: and where do you get that's to say. I remember
Speaker 2: texting him and asking if I could come to his
Speaker 2: hotel room. And I don't even know this man. I
Speaker 2: don't know this man at all, and I'm asking if
Speaker 2: I could come to his room because I wanted to
Speaker 2: tell him that I consensed that you're carrying a lot
Speaker 2: of pain and I just want to want to let
Speaker 2: you know. I know you don't know me, but I'm
Speaker 2: here if you want to talk. And then later on
Speaker 2: found out his best friend passed away, his grandpa passed away.
Speaker 2: He was dealing with all this grief and he was
Speaker 2: stuffing it down and putting different substances on top of
Speaker 2: it to forget about it. And I would like to
Speaker 2: say I helped him come out of it.
Speaker 1: How can I?
Speaker 2: Yeah, helped him, helped him.
Speaker 1: He's like, I want to marry this one. She's a keeper. Fuck.
Speaker 1: She dragged me out of a hole. If I ever
Speaker 1: fallen in another hole, she get me out of it.
Speaker 2: I just helped him process his grief because he was not.
Speaker 2: He was trying to ignore it rather than process and
Speaker 2: deal with it and feel all the things that it
Speaker 2: came with.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but one is easier. It's so, And you can't
Speaker 1: blame somebody for avoidance.
Speaker 2: Lord knows it's easier.
Speaker 1: Yeah, avoidance is just but it will get to you.
Speaker 2: Oh, I know it will get to you.
Speaker 1: True. Can you find a less egregious question?
Speaker 2: Yeah? What about? What about? Do you two actually enjoy
Speaker 2: working with each other? Three? Two one? O?
Speaker 1: God, I enjoy working with the kid. I put her
Speaker 1: in everything for that reason. I think she's good. Like,
Speaker 1: of course I think she's good. She reads my dialogue
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, that's that. That sounds great. That
Speaker 1: sounds better than the way I heard it in my head.
Speaker 1: And if in terms of this, like this doesn't even
Speaker 1: feel like work therapy, if anything.
Speaker 2: Just hanging out, hanging out, man.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I enjoy working with the kid very very much.
Speaker 2: It's a very special thing that we get to. We're
Speaker 2: able to work with you each other.
Speaker 1: Truth. I mean, yeah, there, you know lucky? Are we crazy?
Speaker 1: Fucking lucky? Lucky? Blessed one might say, absolutely blessed as
Speaker 1: blessed as the Biblical avengers aka Dogma The Resurrection Tour
Speaker 1: in theaters tune fifth. But I'm on tour with it
Speaker 1: right now. Come see me.
Speaker 2: I think comes out the door will be over.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think, well, is this the fifth week?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: So if this is like, but it's like it goes
Speaker 1: on May thirtieth, Like there's the santiscoing purpose.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah yeah, dog movie dot Com, Dog.
Speaker 1: Movie dot Com. If you want to still see me
Speaker 1: with the movie on tour, but June fifth, you can
Speaker 1: just go down to your local movie theater and just
Speaker 1: see it.
Speaker 2: That's crazy.
Speaker 1: It can be everywhere, like fucking like growing like a weed.
Speaker 2: A beautiful, beautiful weed that's going.
Speaker 1: To bloom and die within the span of two weeks.
Speaker 1: Oh lord, like most movies.
Speaker 2: All right, well, yes, let's be more optimistic.
Speaker 1: You want optimism, Come see dog Ma Kids, party like
Speaker 1: it's nineteen ninety nine.
Speaker 2: Prepare thyself for the second coming dog Ma coming.
Speaker 1: To movie theaters June fit. See it on Door with
Speaker 1: Kevin Smith Live Kids. There's your beardless stickless me. Thank
Speaker 1: you for your patients. While I've been off doing the
Speaker 1: tour and whatnot, it occurred to me that you could
Speaker 1: have probably done some shows with Puff.
Speaker 2: People would be like, wait, what the fuck.
Speaker 1: She's like, what there if Puff is the host? They're like,
Speaker 1: which one's beardless and which one's stickless?
Speaker 2: So true, it's too confusing.
Speaker 1: Thank you for your patience. The next episode will be
Speaker 1: back to somewhat real time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the president is the present.
Speaker 1: We will be able to talk about everything that's happened
Speaker 1: over the course of the last month that we seemingly
Speaker 1: refused to address in the show, Like something massive could
Speaker 1: have happened. Man, Yeah, fucking aliens could have landed and shit,
Speaker 1: and everyone's like, do you hear the show? This week?
Speaker 1: They still like talking about Milt need Goddamn, he's going
Speaker 1: through a thing.
Speaker 2: She can fucking heal them.
Speaker 1: What the fuck they're not talking about the aliens?
Speaker 2: A fucking vapories half of Pittsburgh. Oh fuck, why Pittsburgh?
Speaker 1: They hate Ketchup?
Speaker 2: They hate Ketchup?
Speaker 1: Why the aliens? Oh of course it's like the aliens
Speaker 1: and fucking signs how they couldn't handle water and ship
Speaker 1: like that? These ones hate Ketchup. And so the first
Speaker 1: strike if you're gonna take over the fucking planet is
Speaker 1: you eliminate the Ketchup centers. And we all know Hines
Speaker 1: is in Pittsburgh. Wow. Yeah, so true. Maybe I can
Speaker 1: be as creative as I once was, But Dogma, that's
Speaker 1: a movie right there.
Speaker 2: I think I think you're set.
Speaker 1: If I could just put a moral skeleton on it
Speaker 1: talk about Catholicism or something like that.
Speaker 2: You'll get there.
Speaker 1: We'll try. Uh, kids, there's your beardless stickless meat for
Speaker 1: this week. Don't you wish you had a kid so
Speaker 1: you could sit around. I saw somebody at a where
Speaker 1: it was I. I was someplace recently and I was
Speaker 1: in front of people. It was small and oh the
Speaker 1: rocky and bunkle thing. The other night, somebody as I
Speaker 1: was leaving was like they introduced themselves and they were
Speaker 1: there with their kids and blah blah blah chur chad
Speaker 1: and they fucking referenced the show where they were just like,
Speaker 1: that's why we love fearless sickless meeting. Man. It reminds
Speaker 1: of our relationship. I was like, you listen to the
Speaker 1: My Good Show. Where's your dickla shirt? Which reminds me
Speaker 1: put it up in your stories? Yes you want shirt? Uh,
Speaker 1: there it is.
Speaker 2: Because there's your beardless dickless me for this week. I'm
Speaker 2: Kevin Smith and I'm Harley Quinn Smith.
Speaker 3: This has been a podcast production podcast podcast using our
Speaker 3: mouths on you since two thousand and seven. Hey kids,
Speaker 3: did you like what you just heard? Well, guess what
Speaker 3: We've got tons more man, thousands of hours of podcasts
Speaker 3: waiting for you at that Kevinsmith club dot com.
Speaker 1: Go sign up now,