Speaker 1: Welcome back to Beardless, dickless me.
Speaker 2: I'm Kevin Smith and I'm Harley Quinn Smith.
Speaker 1: Before we go any further, kids, just I know everyone's
Speaker 1: going through things at any given moment, and everybody's wrapped
Speaker 1: up in their own lives, and that makes sense. But
Speaker 1: every once in a while, you just have to stop
Speaker 1: and appreciate a motherfucker who will second before the show begins,
Speaker 1: apply slather, look close across their lips. She cared enough
Speaker 1: about you to be like, wait, goods it is I
Speaker 1: would you fuck me?
Speaker 2: By fuck me?
Speaker 1: You fucking total.
Speaker 2: I like your buffalo.
Speaker 1: I've seen the movie quite a few times. Rocket, you
Speaker 1: know Jay did it, and I know I know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: my legs are so like I talk without talking.
Speaker 2: Same actually same. Anyways, I'm hijacking. I'm hijacking the show. Yeah,
Speaker 2: what do you going? Remember when I said that the
Speaker 2: shirts were coming tomorrow?
Speaker 1: What that looks? Fire Man, I'm a dicklet If you're
Speaker 1: one of the fucking three people that subscribe to that
Speaker 1: Kevin Smith Club, that Kevin Smith club dot com to
Speaker 1: watch Beardless stick with me, you would see Harley holding
Speaker 1: up a fire T shirt.
Speaker 2: It's for you.
Speaker 1: This one's mine.
Speaker 2: Yes, that will be thirty five plus.
Speaker 1: I remember asking about how soft it would be. You're like,
Speaker 1: I didn't have enough money to get soft on the soft.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, Oh look at this man, Well, fucking I'm
Speaker 1: a dick lit beardless. Stick with me. That's what's on
Speaker 1: the front. Nothing on the back, because that's how kids
Speaker 1: like it.
Speaker 2: No, that's what was really.
Speaker 1: Don't sell double sided T shirts either, Fucking a man,
Speaker 1: how many do you make?
Speaker 2: Unlimited supply? Limited supply?
Speaker 1: Is that one of them? Or is that like that
Speaker 1: is one of them? Serious? I will give you money.
Speaker 2: No, but you can.
Speaker 1: That's you're going to start with your Instagram.
Speaker 2: Or what is it called subscribers.
Speaker 1: It's just called Instagram subscribers can come up the fancier
Speaker 1: name than that. It's basically only fans but on Instagram and.
Speaker 2: Nips dot com non slip dot com. No, no, no,
Speaker 2: it's nothing crazy.
Speaker 1: In that group alone, you could probably fucking get rid
Speaker 1: of all your T shirts once. Let me tell you something,
Speaker 1: Proud is one of one of Proud's days as a parent,
Speaker 1: watching you move toward T shirts the first time you
Speaker 1: made something weird.
Speaker 2: That's I'm telling you, weird, guys.
Speaker 1: T shirts are you know, they they're useful. People got
Speaker 1: to wear something, and you know, if it's cool enough T.
Speaker 2: Shirts, someone's got to wear something.
Speaker 1: You know. That's and in this world, most people just
Speaker 1: buy the T shirts they're presented because you have a thing,
Speaker 1: and I mean anybody can do this, but because you
Speaker 1: have a marketable platform, you can literally make a T
Speaker 1: shirt of the thing you do and sell that T shirt.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and here we are.
Speaker 1: And one day, you know when I'll be even prouder
Speaker 1: when you put your face on one of these shirts.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I'll every sew a shirt was
Speaker 2: my face.
Speaker 1: That's the day that I'll be Look, so she is
Speaker 1: my son. Thanks, Well, that's fucking tremendous. When's the father
Speaker 1: Dave T shirt happen? It's gonna be very excited, is
Speaker 1: your aunt Virginia? Fuck, she listens to the show. So's
Speaker 1: Uncle Don and Grandma Grace. I'm telling you they're gonna
Speaker 1: buy all the T shirts.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. Thanks guys. You can have one on
Speaker 2: the house that's not on the house for grandma.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go. I'll wind up paying for that.
Speaker 1: The yeah, man T shirt. Fucking we're gonna sell these T.
Speaker 2: Shirts Shopify and our website.
Speaker 1: Beardlessdicklessmeat dot com. Yeah, man, fucking this is this is
Speaker 1: a step in the right direction.
Speaker 2: You didn't do this by yourself. I didn't. Who hell my
Speaker 2: bandmate Nick oh.
Speaker 1: Nick Melancholie himself was just like, I'll put down my
Speaker 1: sat infinite sadness long enough to help you make a
Speaker 1: T shirt. It looks good, clever, it looks good though.
Speaker 1: I like it. I like the drop shadow effect to it,
Speaker 1: and it makes it official. Beardless dickless me. I know
Speaker 1: you can't run from it. Now. We are at the
Speaker 1: over the halfway mark of a year's worth of shows.
Speaker 1: To be fair, we put up like ten fifteen at once,
Speaker 1: but we are at like I think this is a show.
Speaker 2: Thirty damn look at us.
Speaker 1: I know, consistent, way more consistent than vegan abatoire.
Speaker 2: Yeah that is true.
Speaker 1: Did we surpass the vegan apptua? Oh? Yeah, are you serious? Yeah,
Speaker 1: we need to add that as a department on this show.
Speaker 2: I would love that.
Speaker 1: I like the vegan aptour, enter the vegan abtoa with
Speaker 1: a girl and her dad, and then we can do
Speaker 1: the story. People want departments. They're like, look, we gave
Speaker 1: you thirty twenty nine episodes to.
Speaker 2: Scattershot talk about whatever you want.
Speaker 1: Fucking you know, goddamn give me back my name. Fucking
Speaker 1: little helf that like, fucking can't hand like that getting potter.
Speaker 2: Now we're looking for a little structure. They want stability,
Speaker 2: they want departments. Okay, let's do it.
Speaker 1: I mean being appen to us one.
Speaker 2: I would love that.
Speaker 1: Uh, passion is another.
Speaker 2: Is another that we don't revisit enough.
Speaker 1: That's true. Did you write any down?
Speaker 2: I could problem passion ration?
Speaker 1: You just go one?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what I'm saying, passionate ration for the week.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I think we were overdoing. People were like, hey, hey, hey,
Speaker 1: too much passion.
Speaker 2: I think we should have a rash your passion too much.
Speaker 2: I think we should have a music section done and done.
Speaker 1: What do you mean, Oh, well, one way where we
Speaker 1: listen to music and appreciate it.
Speaker 2: Like, yeah, let's just we We can be silent on
Speaker 2: our podcast.
Speaker 3: Can't we do like silent disco? Or we just put
Speaker 3: and now this is the part of the show where
Speaker 3: we're going to listen to music. Everybody put in your
Speaker 3: headphones and pick any song you want, and for the
Speaker 3: next two minutes, let's just all be together.
Speaker 2: I like that section.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, You're like, there's always this weird two
Speaker 1: minutes of the show.
Speaker 2: Where they stop talking, stop.
Speaker 1: Talking, and I hear them moving side as I hear
Speaker 1: like material rustling here snapping. I don't even know what's
Speaker 1: singing to. They never tell us what we could do
Speaker 1: a music department.
Speaker 2: I like when we talkten.
Speaker 1: Listening to and show like that have a snappy name,
Speaker 1: the passion I ration. What was the other one? Vegan
Speaker 1: Abaga snappy name. Oh my god, Yeah, that show had
Speaker 1: to die so the show could live.
Speaker 2: So true that show walk.
Speaker 1: Die forever like a phoenix. It arise as a department
Speaker 1: within the show.
Speaker 2: Wow, I'm so happy that you want to resurrect it.
Speaker 1: I think it's a great name.
Speaker 2: It's the best name I I keep I always say that, you.
Speaker 1: Always say, what is a great name?
Speaker 2: Yes, just so smart. It's such a good name you
Speaker 2: think of that. It's so smart. I asked you to
Speaker 2: come up with a band name at the level of
Speaker 2: Vegan Albatore.
Speaker 1: Why don't just take vegana killer band name. Oh, you're
Speaker 1: worried that'll limit you, right, because you're like, well, we
Speaker 1: want meat eaters to listen to meat eating money spins
Speaker 1: to Okay, all right, I'm telling you man, Uh, what
Speaker 1: was the one I said like a long time ago.
Speaker 1: I said it on the podcast he did. Yeah, it
Speaker 1: was a name for like a it's mister body.
Speaker 2: Of water of some sort, don't Darnadel's.
Speaker 1: Dardenell's is the one.
Speaker 2: I how do you say Dardenell's.
Speaker 1: It's a great name. It's like the Dandylions.
Speaker 2: It just sounds like Darnell, like the Dandy Worlds. That
Speaker 2: was a band. I feel like I want something a
Speaker 2: little a little more original than what the Dandy warld
Speaker 2: Well that happened, that they were a real thing.
Speaker 1: I didn't know. Did you not know that we're a
Speaker 1: real band? The Dandy world never heard? Then, apparently we
Speaker 1: do need a music to work.
Speaker 2: I think we do one in which you will.
Speaker 1: Get fucking schooled on a regular basis as to the songs.
Speaker 1: You don't even know. They didn't heard of their name?
Speaker 2: Nice? What is the what other departments can we come
Speaker 2: up with? I mean, we got to have a little
Speaker 2: a little bit of space to be us, to just
Speaker 2: be us out of a department.
Speaker 1: So that would be that's just chip chat, So.
Speaker 2: Chit chat at the top the show.
Speaker 1: People like this too much of that already, then we
Speaker 1: go home to your chip chat.
Speaker 2: We want departments fair enough, huh. I can give you
Speaker 2: the disney Land updates.
Speaker 1: Can you come up a departments? Macy apartments doing fucking dummy?
Speaker 1: Oh fucking.
Speaker 2: Departments? Oh my god?
Speaker 1: Why do you keep doing this? He doesn't sleeping the
Speaker 1: same time as you do.
Speaker 2: Oh, he would hate that you said that. Why you
Speaker 2: just exposed to him.
Speaker 1: He's one of those late night he's like burns the
Speaker 1: candle at all ends and ship. Yeah, he's like wall
Speaker 1: flanning spit that way, stay up till like five in
Speaker 1: the morning, and ship it's not five, what is it
Speaker 1: later than five? So he just stays up till like
Speaker 1: seven or eight.
Speaker 2: Yeah, sometimes, so he sleeps during the day sometimes. Yeah,
Speaker 2: he just like, I don't know, the nighttime just really
Speaker 2: is when he comes alive for Yeah, he loves to
Speaker 2: work during the nighttime.
Speaker 1: I'm the look work at all times, but i I'm
Speaker 1: I'm like getting up early because everyone's.
Speaker 2: Asleep, and that's how he feels about it. But yeah,
Speaker 2: but everyone's asleep kind of makes sense.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I wrote another comic book script recently, and it
Speaker 1: was for I can't say, but I'll narrow it down
Speaker 1: to the big two.
Speaker 2: WHOA.
Speaker 1: But I enjoyed getting up at five in the morning
Speaker 1: to like work on it, wake up. I was happy
Speaker 1: to wake up and do it. And then I did
Speaker 1: another draft of MOUs Jaws, the best draft of MOUs
Speaker 1: Jaws yet closest to the source material, and that was
Speaker 1: pretty fucking fire. That's what I do in the wee hours,
Speaker 1: and I get up and I right, yeah.
Speaker 2: I can usually count on your away. He works like it's.
Speaker 1: Like I just watched you when you sleep, staring at you,
Speaker 1: like to watch eight hours go by like speed through
Speaker 1: the camera. He just barely fucking moves and turning in
Speaker 1: the bed.
Speaker 2: Terrifying. He's just like, oh my god, absolutely terrifying.
Speaker 1: Set your alarm on your phone, t wake yourself up periodically,
Speaker 1: so you just be like, you just.
Speaker 2: Got to make sure a RESTful night and sleep. I am.
Speaker 1: So that means, so you go to sleep, and then
Speaker 1: when you wake up, he's going to sleep.
Speaker 2: He would hate that. We're talking about why why is
Speaker 2: it a thing? Because it's just a thing.
Speaker 1: He's like, it's my private sleep.
Speaker 2: Schedule sensitive about it really because it's because he knows
Speaker 2: it's weird.
Speaker 1: I mean a lot of people do that, particularly in
Speaker 1: this town.
Speaker 2: I know, I'm not exactly super in support of it.
Speaker 1: You would, They're like, come to bed, Yeah, He's like,
Speaker 1: I can't. I'm wide awake. I there are times where
Speaker 1: your mom goes to sleep and I just come back
Speaker 1: downstairs here, like because sometimes I'll sleep during the day,
Speaker 1: like fall asleep for a few hours, and then when
Speaker 1: she's like I'm the coan pay it's like eleven o'clock,
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, I'm wile away, and so I'll go
Speaker 1: downstairs and right doom scroll through fucking yeah videos and ship.
Speaker 1: But I try whenever I start doom scrolling and I'm like,
Speaker 1: you know, I go make something this will make you happy,
Speaker 1: I'll just start writing. And sure, that's what he's doing.
Speaker 1: He is.
Speaker 2: He's writing. He's doing crypto things, is he Yeah, he's.
Speaker 1: Well, apparently crypto's back in a big bad way.
Speaker 2: He's he's just doing a little nerd Austin things, just
Speaker 2: like learning about technology things like that.
Speaker 1: He likes to, Uh, does he ever try to explain
Speaker 1: this ship to you?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Sometimes, And then I'm like, I don't care, really, yeah,
Speaker 2: can hear back? But I know, let me carry you
Speaker 2: with Fresh Peaks the Ladies Disney release.
Speaker 1: He's like Jesus if I didn't like suck so.
Speaker 2: Much, Hey, awesome partner.
Speaker 1: You just literally to tell me about the things he
Speaker 1: cares about.
Speaker 2: And about crypto. Shut him down? Shouldn't high give me
Speaker 2: the crypto balls? Do you want to hear about crypto?
Speaker 2: I mean spell the NFT. Okay, thank you, nice job
Speaker 2: and scene to why what what are you going to say?
Speaker 2: Would you like to hear about crypto?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Well then take a seat.
Speaker 1: But if I was like if that was my boyfriend,
Speaker 1: and if.
Speaker 2: Mom was like if suddenly got about.
Speaker 1: Who is from the South, I.
Speaker 2: Don't tell you about crypt it was fatal.
Speaker 1: She suddenly got into.
Speaker 2: Crypto, Yeah, Mom. One day it was like suddenly.
Speaker 1: She was like, uh, to the moon. Bro, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: we're going to the moon.
Speaker 2: Oh God, don't even bring him. What do you mean
Speaker 2: we're going to the moon, don't don't.
Speaker 1: I bought into a mean coin. My god, it has
Speaker 1: a debuted fucking huge called the Hawk to a coin.
Speaker 2: MoMA. I'd be like, damn.
Speaker 1: They figured out how I'm going to financially contribute to
Speaker 1: this family. It's with the Hawk to al coin. I
Speaker 1: think one of us will be paying the bills now, insane.
Speaker 1: I would definitely listen. I would definitely be like, tell
Speaker 1: me about this hawk.
Speaker 2: And how do you know about this?
Speaker 1: I would just assume like she must be sleeping with
Speaker 1: some thirty five year.
Speaker 2: Old Hawk to a Coin.
Speaker 1: I was like, yo, missus Smith, you're you're gonna get
Speaker 1: rich on.
Speaker 2: The Hawk to a coin.
Speaker 1: And she's like, you could call me Jen. We're sleeping together.
Speaker 2: I'm joking about this.
Speaker 1: Kind of some downstairs writing fucking scripts from the Big Two.
Speaker 1: I'm like, and then this superhero says this, what's that
Speaker 1: thumping upstairs? Oh? If you were watching the show Kids
Speaker 1: at that Kevin Smith dot com, you would see Harley
Speaker 1: holding up a bell jar full of macaroni cheese.
Speaker 2: Yeah, my mom made me a little mason jar full
Speaker 2: of mac and cheese.
Speaker 1: MASONR. I guess that's that's it, right?
Speaker 2: What do you call it?
Speaker 1: Bell jar? Does ball on top of.
Speaker 2: It does ball? But I think that's the brand. But
Speaker 2: it's like a maze.
Speaker 1: I think I think I'm conflating that with the bell jar,
Speaker 1: and really the ball it's ball jars. But what was
Speaker 1: the other thing you said?
Speaker 2: It was a Mason jar. I think that's probably more
Speaker 2: of the name, right, I think that's what I would say.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's predominantly that the.
Speaker 2: Mom packed me a little lunch.
Speaker 1: She did she include a note.
Speaker 2: There is actually a note. Let's read the note that mom,
Speaker 2: enjoy with your lunch.
Speaker 1: This is a note from Harley's friend Olivia, and it
Speaker 1: came oh well, based on the handwriting, I'd say while
Speaker 1: they were in single digits. Dear Harley, you are such
Speaker 1: a great friend and we are going to have so
Speaker 1: much fun in South Carolina. I think you're gonna fit
Speaker 1: right in with my family. I also think that you
Speaker 1: will like them very much, and I'm sure that they
Speaker 1: will like you too. We will probably do lots of
Speaker 1: fairy related things.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I was fucking.
Speaker 1: Jennifer's like, what are we gonna do today? I'm like,
Speaker 1: we will probably do lots of very related things.
Speaker 2: I can't wait.
Speaker 1: XO XO XO XO, love Olivia. PS. Sorry if I
Speaker 1: spelled something's wrong. She didn't. Oh, she said, sorry if
Speaker 1: I spelled something's wrong. She did. When she wrote spelled,
Speaker 1: so it was only a her apology. Wow, where she
Speaker 1: dropped the ball. This is not the note I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: When I was a kid, Mamally would put together my
Speaker 1: lunch and she would write a note like on a
Speaker 1: paper towel with like a marker, and like I remember
Speaker 1: opening them in school and being like and hiding it.
Speaker 2: Well, that's a sweet Mamally.
Speaker 1: Of course, now that's apparent to see. But like when
Speaker 1: I was a kid, I was like, I want people
Speaker 1: know that a brother that loves me so lame? I mean,
Speaker 1: is I have saved since then? Like you know things
Speaker 1: that she's written me and stuff in the elevator at
Speaker 1: the movie theater. There's a thing that she wrote that
Speaker 1: said tiger and joy of mom, and I cut it
Speaker 1: out and put it up on the elevator. So I
Speaker 1: think that's important words to remember and stuff.
Speaker 2: Isn't it crazy how when you're younger it's like embarrassing,
Speaker 2: but then you're like later in life, like damn.
Speaker 1: You want to your young self, sit your young self
Speaker 1: down and be like, don't.
Speaker 2: Be an asshole, don't stop being such an ass But you.
Speaker 1: Have to go through that. It's like that fucking Harry
Speaker 1: Chapin songs like Cats in a Cradle.
Speaker 2: Wow, you know boy just like me? Do you know
Speaker 2: that's the Cats and the Crew? Sup?
Speaker 1: But do you know what it's about?
Speaker 2: I guess, I guess.
Speaker 1: It's got a banger of a chorus. The Cats in
Speaker 1: the Cradle, in the City of a Spoon, Little Boy
Speaker 1: Blue and the Man in the Moon. Do you know
Speaker 1: the next words when you're coming homes h son, I
Speaker 1: don't know when, but we'll get together then and you
Speaker 1: know we'll have a good time then. So it's like
Speaker 1: three are they called stanzas?
Speaker 2: What is it when it's like a like a line?
Speaker 1: No, but like what's not the chorus?
Speaker 2: The verse? The verses.
Speaker 1: So there's like three sets of verses that tell the
Speaker 1: story and the courses in there, of course, and uh.
Speaker 1: In the three verses, it tells a story about a
Speaker 1: very busy father who is always on his way to
Speaker 1: work and the kid is like, hey, can we do this?
Speaker 1: And he's like I'd love to, but like, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I've got I got something to do. So wait, what
Speaker 1: is he goes, mom, Yeah, fuck, I forget the words,
Speaker 1: but it's basically his kid going like, hey, you want
Speaker 1: to do something. He's like, no, I can't, and then hey,
Speaker 1: you want to do something? No I can't, and then
Speaker 1: the kid like grows up.
Speaker 2: He's gonna cry. Lord, he was crying. She was trying
Speaker 2: to keep it together. Oh my god.
Speaker 4: It's so heroic. And I've known this song was heartbreaking
Speaker 4: since I was kid. When I was six years old,
Speaker 4: this was heartbreaking song. But in the song, like it
Speaker 4: gets to the last.
Speaker 1: You know, fucking the old he's an old man and
Speaker 1: he calls his kid and he's like, you know, it's reversed.
Speaker 1: It's essentially reverse. It's a morality tale because then his
Speaker 1: kid is it's just like, you know, i'd love to
Speaker 1: it's sure, it's been sure nice talking to you. Dad.
Speaker 1: He's like, I've got the kids, got the flu, and
Speaker 1: I've got this, but it's been nice talking to you.
Speaker 1: And he's like, as I, I don't love the phone.
Speaker 1: It occurred to me. My boy was just like me, oh.
Speaker 2: Every time I'm late to me, Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Here it is a heartbreaking fucking song. And I think
Speaker 1: every everybody you know, it's just that's something you can't like.
Speaker 1: I heard that song my whole life. And although to
Speaker 1: be fair because that song haunted me from childhood. I
Speaker 1: was always like, we have to do things, like you know,
Speaker 1: I was way more present because of that fucking song,
Speaker 1: not because my own man, Like I never gave a
Speaker 1: shit that moment. Man worked at night and shit like
Speaker 1: I was sleeping. When did I give a ship? So
Speaker 1: it's not like I felt he missed anything. And I
Speaker 1: don't feel like he ever really missed anything, Like if
Speaker 1: we just cool play, he would be there on the
Speaker 1: Saturday night. He wouldn't be there on the Friday night show,
Speaker 1: and he wouldn't be there on the Sunday night show.
Speaker 1: But you go statur tonight. So I don't feel that
Speaker 1: like I don't have some sense of like man, oh
Speaker 1: man like didn't spend enough time with me. But that song,
Speaker 1: like from a young age, I was that like it's
Speaker 1: such a well told story that even a child can
Speaker 1: understand the lesson in that song.
Speaker 2: Oh, I need to have like a tally board of
Speaker 2: like when you cry. It should be when I cry
Speaker 2: on one side when I cry when and then on
Speaker 2: the other side when you cry, and we'll see who wins.
Speaker 1: Well we get by the end of the ear by
Speaker 1: the end of fifty two episodes. We'll see you pride more.
Speaker 2: Yeah, probably me. You make me cry a lot.
Speaker 1: I find everything touching.
Speaker 2: That's so true.
Speaker 1: It is you.
Speaker 2: It is good. It's got to be you put that
Speaker 2: the hell down. You can put that the fuck down.
Speaker 2: The cats and the cradles, What is.
Speaker 1: The fucking what are the words? The words? When he's like,
Speaker 1: he's like, you mean, like the kid keeps going like,
Speaker 1: let's do ship, and he's like, cats is it in
Speaker 1: the cradle? Oh my god, I just had I just
Speaker 1: wrote cats first? Fuck it? You think the phone's listening.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you said that.
Speaker 1: With Are you serious?
Speaker 2: Oh? Absolutely? Have you never talk about something and then
Speaker 2: literally a second later see an advertisement for it?
Speaker 1: Got me? Coincidence?
Speaker 2: You keep on telling yourself that buy But this.
Speaker 1: Is how religion starts, people being like, oh, it's prettydestination.
Speaker 2: Let's see. I'm gonna say I'm going to talk. I'm
Speaker 2: going to say the word diapers, diapers.
Speaker 5: Diapers, diapers, diapers like that you put on a basis, Yeah, diapers, disposable,
Speaker 5: disposable diapers, perhaps Pampers, perhaps another brand Jamper is not
Speaker 5: my brain.
Speaker 2: Just not my brad diapers. I like to keep it generic, Okay,
Speaker 2: generic diapers. All right, let's see what happens. Just wait
Speaker 2: a second, but I guarantee the later you're gonna get
Speaker 2: a diaper's commercial.
Speaker 1: Serious.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, yes, it's not even subtle.
Speaker 1: My child wrapped just the other day. Somewhere somebody's going like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, they're gonna sing again. He came to
Speaker 1: the world forward, but there were planes to catch and
Speaker 1: bills to pay. He learned to walk while I was away,
Speaker 1: and he was talking for I knew it. And as
Speaker 1: he grew he said, I'm gonna be like you. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, that's why it's he more harp bringing in.
Speaker 1: He's like, my boy was just like Mane I forgot.
Speaker 1: Oh such good writing.
Speaker 2: Oh shit, more shadowing, the ending of the fucking.
Speaker 1: Son genious, I mean, Harry Champing covert. It was what
Speaker 1: are the other Harry Chambers? What is the mean?
Speaker 2: People has? What Google says?
Speaker 1: What is the meaning behind the song Cats in the Cradle?
Speaker 1: If you can understand English, you can understand this song.
Speaker 1: But for those who came in late kensh Box called
Speaker 1: it a tender story of a father and this his son,
Speaker 1: and a perfect representation of how Roles changed the relationship
Speaker 1: over the years, stating it was a lyrical delight. Record
Speaker 1: World said that the song deals with the preoccupations plaguing
Speaker 1: parenthood and it bridges the generation gap by point. Won't
Speaker 1: you get the rest?
Speaker 2: He started to tear up.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it's fucking but beautiful. It's told verse
Speaker 1: by verse through Harry Chapin, Carpenter, Harry Chapins. N Was
Speaker 1: it just Harry Chapin or is Harry chap Why do
Speaker 1: I keep adding Carpenter? Like, why does he keep saying
Speaker 1: that I don't know Harry Chapin? What else did this
Speaker 1: my vergine? I mean these are fire lyrics.
Speaker 6: Wow.
Speaker 1: Uh, my son turned tent just the other day. He said,
Speaker 1: thanks for the ball that come on, let's play. Can
Speaker 1: you teach me to throw? What said? Not today? Oh
Speaker 1: my god?
Speaker 2: Again, I was like, this song was huge. One was
Speaker 2: a kid and he was a kid. I was like, no,
Speaker 2: play with the ball.
Speaker 1: He's gonna become a serial killer. That's the sequel song.
Speaker 1: That a sequel song is like my father ignored me,
Speaker 1: so you're gonna die in a van in the dead
Speaker 1: of night.
Speaker 2: I'm glad I know about about your things about this song?
Speaker 1: Now, Oh my god, yeah, you could play.
Speaker 2: Can I move this? What's your face?
Speaker 1: I mean, governess? Yes? Can you teach me to throw?
Speaker 1: I said, not today. I got a lot to do.
Speaker 1: He said, that's ok And the kid is always understanding.
Speaker 1: He's not like this piece of ship.
Speaker 2: It's like, I demand your attention. Yeah, what a piece
Speaker 2: of ship? That kid?
Speaker 1: Raise me?
Speaker 2: Hey, I know.
Speaker 1: Fuck the bar is so high with this kid so demanding.
Speaker 1: Richie rich over here, play with me. Thanks for the ball?
Speaker 1: Will you throw it to me?
Speaker 2: What the fuck? I already got your ball on.
Speaker 1: You do the rest.
Speaker 7: You said, I got a lot, that's okay, And as
Speaker 7: he walked away, I got a lot to do. He said,
Speaker 7: that's okay, and he walked way, but his smile never
Speaker 7: did it said I'm gonna be like him. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 7: I'm gonna be like him.
Speaker 2: Oh God, that's that's beautiful.
Speaker 1: Do you think that motherfucker like, of course he knew
Speaker 1: what he was doing, But do you think he knew
Speaker 1: when he sat down to be like, I'm gonna write
Speaker 1: the ultimate guilt anthem? It really is fire. People are
Speaker 1: gonna want to sing along, and some of them are
Speaker 1: not gonna look beyond the chorus to understand that this
Speaker 1: is a song of.
Speaker 2: Fucking when you really listen, sadness.
Speaker 1: Like there's a morality tale here, like it really is.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. And if he did, I mean, did he
Speaker 1: know He's like, and then when I get to the end, bitch,
Speaker 1: oh my god, they're gonna be a dry eye in
Speaker 1: the fucking house because I'm gonna bring the words back,
Speaker 1: the same words he kept saying. The Dad's gonna be like, Wow,
Speaker 1: that kid was right, and the dad's gonna realize it
Speaker 1: was too late. He lost he missed the window, telling you, bro,
Speaker 1: that's why I remember I always talked about like when
Speaker 1: we Madio goes, I was like, this is made up
Speaker 1: for the I needed five million dollars to make up
Speaker 1: for the one time that I carried across because of
Speaker 1: that fucking song. When we played Hide and Seek up
Speaker 1: in the bedroom for like an hour, kit, and you know,
Speaker 1: it's like we've ran out of places to hide, like
Speaker 1: fucking hours. Like you know, by the time we were
Speaker 1: on our fifteenth sixteenth game, it's like there are that
Speaker 1: many places to die.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I'd hide you find me fair enough, I guess.
Speaker 1: But then you know again, I was like, all right,
Speaker 1: and then we finally got to a place and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, partly like there's nowhere left to hide, Like.
Speaker 2: There's so we're left.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm exposed.
Speaker 2: I stand naked before you people. Are you petal? Fuck?
Speaker 2: Oh my god?
Speaker 1: I was like, it's my soul I was talking about. No,
Speaker 1: I didn't play like I did not go another round,
Speaker 1: and like I remember like that you were so disappointed
Speaker 1: because like you know, kid'll do anything like dogs, you
Speaker 1: can do it fucking a thousand times. And I really
Speaker 1: felt like I dropped the ball on that one. So
Speaker 1: years later I made yogasers. I was like, this gives
Speaker 1: me another chance of players. Probably you know, could have
Speaker 1: just been like, hey, let's go to David Mustards. Saved
Speaker 1: everybody a lot of time and money, but.
Speaker 2: Now we have something to show for it. And you know,
Speaker 2: you know, I don't know what Nasferatu would have been
Speaker 2: like had not yoga hosers walked before KNOWSU ran.
Speaker 1: That's right, Colleen, which one you were, Mackenzie? She was
Speaker 1: Colleen collect Colleen C.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Colleen C lived.
Speaker 1: So that na Seratu lady could fucking rise in the
Speaker 1: dead or whatever. What is her character's name. She's like
Speaker 1: the Mina hark hark Harker Harkness of this story. But
Speaker 1: I don't know what her characters.
Speaker 2: I can't remember.
Speaker 1: I looked up on a billboard the other day and
Speaker 1: I was like, oh shit, they like whole fucking he's
Speaker 1: marketing around her because the other guy's got a mustache.
Speaker 2: Looks silly, especially because I see a picture of them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I finally did, and I was likest the mustache.
Speaker 2: Dude.
Speaker 1: It was a choice. It was not the choice I
Speaker 1: would have made.
Speaker 2: But like my one criticism of.
Speaker 1: Its just like you know, it's missing a Bert Reynolds
Speaker 1: like mustache.
Speaker 2: He doesn't got any hair, So it's like why.
Speaker 1: It was kind of crazy, especially because if you're remotely
Speaker 1: familiar with Nostraatu at all, and I have been for
Speaker 1: many years, we got a look in our head like
Speaker 1: only because not the one I made up is I've
Speaker 1: been presented with what Nosaratu looks like to be like
Speaker 1: it's but with it's like Malibu Stacey, but there's a
Speaker 1: new hat.
Speaker 2: It's crazy, But fuck me, it didn't bother anybody else.
Speaker 1: People they're like, I like the fash made like a
Speaker 1: hundred million bucks.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean it was an awesome movie.
Speaker 1: I but yeah, fucking everybody needs to get off yoga dick.
Speaker 1: Now you know next year it'll be ten years.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, don't say that.
Speaker 1: Does that make you feel older? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Makes you feel old.
Speaker 1: You were such a fucking poppy ward child.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, sixteen I'm gonna have av one review.
Speaker 1: One review said this was tantamount to child to be.
Speaker 2: No, it did. It did casting here in the movies
Speaker 2: that this is ten amount of child to be. I
Speaker 2: was honestly about to just start crying and panicking. That
Speaker 2: was ten years ago, but then I took you out
Speaker 2: of it. That took me out of it for a second.
Speaker 2: But now I'm going back down the road. I'm crying
Speaker 2: ten years next year.
Speaker 1: So right now it's nine years. That's great. Why does
Speaker 1: it feel like yesterday to you? Ah, crying out and
Speaker 1: the cradle of a spood? Ten years ago you were
Speaker 1: in the movie.
Speaker 2: Now your career is going down the trim.
Speaker 1: Now your friends in a movie with a bustage.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Yeah, I don't know. You're fucking so young.
Speaker 1: You're fucking twenty nine, twenty six years, you're twenty five.
Speaker 2: You got your whole life out of you and you're
Speaker 2: being nostalgic for sixteen. Oh my god, it was.
Speaker 1: This is this is Harley at sixteen, like I want
Speaker 1: to quit school and this is me she probably should, right,
Speaker 1: And this is Jennifer Are you fucking high? And this
Speaker 1: is me?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yes, increasingly so, why do you ask? Oh my god? Yeah?
Speaker 2: That was what a what a.
Speaker 1: What a golden era when I think of high school,
Speaker 1: like I was just in Jersey fairly recently went back
Speaker 1: for you know, the Malrets thing and the Wicked Singalong,
Speaker 1: and I'll be back there February ninth for another Wicked
Speaker 1: Singalong and February twenty third for cop Out fifteenth out
Speaker 1: of fifteenth anniversary screening tickets. It's podcasts at cinemas dot com.
Speaker 1: But we should mention before we go further. You and
Speaker 1: I when this episode drops on Thursday, if you're in
Speaker 1: Los Angeles, you can go to oh Yeah, Dynasty Typewriter
Speaker 1: and see me and Harley on Love It or Leave It, Yeah,
Speaker 1: which I you know, just had a panic attack about
Speaker 1: before we began in the show because they sent over
Speaker 1: to like, hey, this is the stuff we're going to
Speaker 1: talk about. I'm like, I'm talking about any of this thing,
Speaker 1: Like honestly, they may they might have they they might
Speaker 1: as well have sent me like first we're going to
Speaker 1: talk about golf, then we're gonna talk about football, then
Speaker 1: we're going to talk about the ball of bass, then
Speaker 1: we're gonna talk about like fucking you know, Olympics. Like
Speaker 1: it's just I'm out of my depth, like you know,
Speaker 1: and I had to call the producer and be like, bro,
Speaker 1: I I'm not smart. I can't talk about these things
Speaker 1: like I'm talking. I can only really talk about Kevin
Speaker 1: Smithy type things. And then I realized that I have
Speaker 1: cle cleaved, like carved a lane for myself where I
Speaker 1: could just sit in it and do what I want.
Speaker 1: And I saw somebody on Twitter recently, or maybe it
Speaker 1: was on Twitter, but it was via letterbox or something
Speaker 1: like somebody reviewed the four thirty movie and they were like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, fucking who knew that Kevin smith can
Speaker 1: still make a good movie. This is this was great
Speaker 1: in the way that all of his recent movies, you know,
Speaker 1: have been these nostalgic wanks. And I'm like, man, like,
Speaker 1: I remember when I was making these Q movies. You know,
Speaker 1: By the time I got to Jameson about striking back.
Speaker 1: People like like, oh, they're all connect and ship. I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I guess I should stop that. Then
Speaker 1: I did a bunch of ship that wasn't They were like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, do those movies again. Then I was
Speaker 1: doing interconnected movies again. And then somebody's like a nostalgic
Speaker 1: You can never.
Speaker 2: Can never please them all.
Speaker 1: No, not in the least any nine years ago. Oh god,
Speaker 1: we were on a we were on a set probably like.
Speaker 2: Right now, that's crazy, that's really so crazy.
Speaker 1: How are you going to celebrate the tenure? I hope
Speaker 1: we can sell out a screening on that ten year anniversary.
Speaker 1: Rose will come.
Speaker 2: I don't know. Maybe I bet she would.
Speaker 1: Man Like she was in the neighborhood.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she was in New York. I'm sure she would.
Speaker 2: She's like all over the world.
Speaker 1: She's like, I love to go to the Yogo just
Speaker 1: ten year anniversary screening in your little theater in New Jersey.
Speaker 1: But I'm saving the world for Chanel. She's monumentally busy.
Speaker 2: But that's what I mean.
Speaker 1: I'm certainly not comparing myself to your young friend. But
Speaker 1: people always assume that I'm busy, and I'm not. You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like I always have time to do.
Speaker 1: You are pretty busy, I know, but I got'ta make
Speaker 1: time to do, ship if it matters.
Speaker 2: That's true. Going on over there, just a little sniffling.
Speaker 2: Now it was years ago? Puff puff.
Speaker 1: Puff?
Speaker 2: Why so loud.
Speaker 1: Puff your there's just nine years ago? Where's my youth?
Speaker 1: Cud puff? You stole my youth? You motherfucker with young
Speaker 1: and beautiful?
Speaker 2: You told them from me.
Speaker 1: I got a fucking d You're right, ship, Oh my.
Speaker 2: God, as hates this episode of Beard listicless.
Speaker 1: Mate, No wow, So like your fucking boyfriend don't listen
Speaker 1: and my girlfriend don't listen?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Literally, what does that say? I don't fucking know.
Speaker 1: Maybe we're just not as interesting as we think. Probably
Speaker 1: you know what that you know what it says? You
Speaker 1: know here, I'll know exactly.
Speaker 2: I don't think I'm interesting. I don't.
Speaker 1: I think you're interesting. Your dad doing the show because
Speaker 1: you're interesting. I think your points are funny, I hope,
Speaker 1: and I like making.
Speaker 2: Funny all every single time we did That's true, every
Speaker 2: single time we do an episode. The whole time, I'm like,
Speaker 2: why would anyone want to hear me? Talk.
Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe they're like smart this dumbass probably
Speaker 1: maybe make them feel good about themselves, you know what
Speaker 1: to do that for you, or maybe you're just their
Speaker 1: cup too, Like yeah, man, I like the way she thinks.
Speaker 1: Hey man, didn't you give fucking the person that was
Speaker 1: like shitting on you had a reversal of fortune and
Speaker 1: this was the person listening your hair?
Speaker 2: And what was they said? My laugh is is hard
Speaker 2: to listen to.
Speaker 1: Is that the same and is that the same person
Speaker 1: that was? Like then then hey man, you should be
Speaker 1: fucking happy if somebody robbed your house.
Speaker 2: But essentially like, what do you mean you're mad that
Speaker 2: you should goddamn liberal let him rob your house? Yes,
Speaker 2: that was that was quite the stretch right there. But
Speaker 2: then they apologize because they listen and we've talked about
Speaker 2: them for there it is.
Speaker 1: There's squeaky Will gets the grease.
Speaker 2: Literally have now gotten three mentioned in three episodes.
Speaker 1: I know, but yeah, he's like, look and I'm sure,
Speaker 1: but you know exactly. You mentioned me a nice ship.
Speaker 1: You mentioned me.
Speaker 2: I am literally literally Harley said it to me, and
Speaker 2: I was like.
Speaker 1: Well, that's the best possible outcome right there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't want to talk about him.
Speaker 1: That's it too much. Some reason I assumed it was
Speaker 1: a girl.
Speaker 2: No, I don't. Maybe maybe I assumed it was a
Speaker 2: guy because of his name, But I don't want to
Speaker 2: say his name because I'm not going to.
Speaker 1: Be a name that could go either way. Don't put
Speaker 1: down the desk. Oh my god, like a child putting
Speaker 1: stickers on things. You should yeah the uh, all right,
Speaker 1: let's do the vegan APATOI part of the show the department.
Speaker 1: Now all right, now you enter the vegan aptoire. Welcome,
Speaker 1: where a girl and her dad talk about vegans. I
Speaker 1: just before Harley got here, I made, let's two or
Speaker 1: six eight Beyond burgers on the grill, went out, fired
Speaker 1: up the grill.
Speaker 2: They were delicious.
Speaker 1: Thank you. Put my special spies and stuff.
Speaker 2: Upon it makes them so good.
Speaker 1: Black and the salt stuff.
Speaker 2: It is crazy.
Speaker 1: I know most vegans are real vegans would be like
Speaker 1: beyond burgers noting height of veganism, bro, But it's crazy
Speaker 1: how many bomburgers we consume.
Speaker 2: This family, this family really loves a beyond burger.
Speaker 1: Your your mom who never was never a burger person. Yeah,
Speaker 1: historically she's just like I. I can get perfect man.
Speaker 1: She can keep me coming.
Speaker 2: They powered me.
Speaker 1: She has been pulling boxes up out of the garage
Speaker 1: because we sent another U haul back east to Jersey
Speaker 1: for Ernie to like kind of go through for the
Speaker 1: next s Mackshire, and that freed up a lot more
Speaker 1: room in the garage, so she was able to get
Speaker 1: to things that she thought were like lost. She was like,
Speaker 1: I can't find this stuff, and you get real emotional,
Speaker 1: and then we found all. She's like, oh guy, including
Speaker 1: the barn bed that used to sleep in.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, that was the coolest bed of all time, Harley.
Speaker 1: You know, when I was a kid, the height of like,
Speaker 1: oh you must have parents, those kinds of parents that
Speaker 1: love you was the racing car bed.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, those seemed cool.
Speaker 1: A bed that was shaped like a racing car. And
Speaker 1: you know, most seventies eighties parents were like, no, you're
Speaker 1: gonna do that, like my parents. I was gonna get one.
Speaker 1: My parents are, you know, like you're not even a
Speaker 1: car kid. That's true, you know what I'm saying. But
Speaker 1: they were also like, no, your bed matches your brothers,
Speaker 1: because me and Uncle Don shared a room, so their
Speaker 1: philosophy was it would look weird. That he's sleeping in
Speaker 1: a bed and you're sleeping in a car.
Speaker 2: Like but so I never heard enough.
Speaker 1: Looks their money whatever, and it's not like you know,
Speaker 1: And if I.
Speaker 2: Had a car or a race in bed, I would
Speaker 2: have been a bed of main There's no Harry Chapin
Speaker 2: to this, you know.
Speaker 1: But the racing car bed was definitely for me, for
Speaker 1: Jason Muse, for anyone who we grew up with. Certainly
Speaker 1: a sign of affluence. M hm cut to Harley is
Speaker 1: a youngster, she needs to sleep.
Speaker 2: I got somewhere in in uh.
Speaker 1: I don't even think they're there anymore. But it was
Speaker 1: over by the Beverly Center. There was this kid's furniture store.
Speaker 1: And were you with us when we went in for
Speaker 1: the first time? Did you pick it out? Or I
Speaker 1: think it was just me and like I went in
Speaker 1: originally because I knew like I would get someone would
Speaker 1: fight me on. But we committed and bought this what
Speaker 1: we call the barn bed.
Speaker 2: It was really a marvel of a piece of furniture.
Speaker 2: It was. It was stunning. It was the bed of
Speaker 2: a single child. It was it was dreams were made
Speaker 2: of Like if my ceilings at my house now would
Speaker 2: would take this. I would probably have it in my house.
Speaker 1: Yeah is it sixy sleeping in the barn bed? No bed,
Speaker 1: it's a fucking cow looking at me.
Speaker 2: There was there were three level. There were three levels.
Speaker 2: Imagine if you've seen.
Speaker 1: The old version of Sweeney Todd on Broadway with the
Speaker 1: big block that they would turn around, that's kind of
Speaker 1: what Arley's bed looked like. It looked like it was
Speaker 1: shaped like a barn, painted like a barn that fake
Speaker 1: animals on. Everything was designed for it to be like
Speaker 1: this is a barn, including barn doors that could open
Speaker 1: and closed. Oh yeah, like so you'd be shut in
Speaker 1: like a time.
Speaker 2: That's so true. So it was what an absolute like.
Speaker 1: Marble, and it wasn't honestly like it wasn't like cheap,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't that expensive all things considered, and it
Speaker 1: lasted forever and still exists. So it had a slide
Speaker 1: out trundle on the bottom that could slide back in,
Speaker 1: so if you had a guest over man the main
Speaker 1: bed itself was in the barn proper and so as
Speaker 1: previously mentioned, it had born door barn doors that swung
Speaker 1: open and.
Speaker 8: You get in the bed and lit windows had little
Speaker 8: windows as well look out because on the side you
Speaker 8: could look out the window like so once you were
Speaker 8: in the barn, you weren't entunbed, like, oh my god,
Speaker 8: you have to fucking join that Kevin Smith club if
Speaker 8: you if you're sure, even if you burn and sure, right,
Speaker 8: you just joined just to watch us and drop out.
Speaker 2: This fucking kid.
Speaker 1: It was like the moment jj Abram's Mission Impossible where
Speaker 1: Felicity's fucking brain blew up because somebody.
Speaker 2: Stuck it like a minigrade eighteen then and she was like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, Ethan, she just did that. Her eye
Speaker 2: went all and ship and you were like a little
Speaker 2: fly flew by. That was a reaction to it was loud.
Speaker 1: Good lord. The beautiful feature on this barn bed though,
Speaker 1: was at a third floor, so there was a mini
Speaker 1: staircase under which there were drawers to put clothing and
Speaker 1: a storage facility and.
Speaker 2: A little dog a little doggy house.
Speaker 1: A little doghouse. Then you walked up these little stairs
Speaker 1: and somebody could sleep in the.
Speaker 2: Bunk up top.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is pretty cool, fucking cool, and we got
Speaker 1: years out of it, like you know, until you're I
Speaker 1: don't want to have six on this anymore.
Speaker 6: Oh, yeah, it when you were I guess probably by
Speaker 6: the time you were, like in high school would have been.
Speaker 2: But I think sometime in middle school, is that.
Speaker 1: What it went away? Yeah. But we got a good,
Speaker 1: like fucking I would say, I don't know, like easily
Speaker 1: five to eight years out of that bed and then
Speaker 1: you know, got dismantled and put into storage. And then
Speaker 1: last year we emptied the storage facilities and put them
Speaker 1: all the contents here in the ground. Now we had
Speaker 1: access to the barn bet again.
Speaker 2: Wow, and so put it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yea, yeah,
Speaker 2: your mom please put.
Speaker 1: Your mom was like, can we put up a bar bet?
Speaker 1: I was like no. As she goes you don't want to,
Speaker 1: I was like no, I thought you meant could we Like,
Speaker 1: I don't know how to build things, but we can
Speaker 1: hire somebody, so true, build this barn bed again for
Speaker 1: us and stuff like that. Put it together the first time.
Speaker 1: But there's a bed in Harley's what used to be
Speaker 1: Harley's room now and uh, I think that bed is
Speaker 1: going with nobody goes in there, nobody ever uses. So
Speaker 1: I think we're going to in which may be one
Speaker 1: of the saddest you know, fucking reach backs or the
Speaker 1: empty nest parents.
Speaker 2: That we are.
Speaker 1: We're going to reconstruct Harley's childhood bed.
Speaker 2: You're like, you want to sleep over, We put.
Speaker 1: Your bed back up. Austin can sleep in the top, one.
Speaker 2: Can sleep in the trundle.
Speaker 1: It's true, man, the cats could have the cats and
Speaker 1: that's not vegan though, portion we can't stick to our departments.
Speaker 2: What was the thing that you ate lately that you
Speaker 2: really liked?
Speaker 1: I over bought two things recently, not them be consumed.
Speaker 1: I when I was in Jersey about a fuck ton
Speaker 1: of chocolate Twizzlers.
Speaker 2: That's who knew those were vegan? Yeah that's crazy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've always I thought you knew that, but yeah
Speaker 1: I did not. Is when you go to the movie theater, man, twizzlers.
Speaker 2: I know twizzlers are, but I won't assume the chocolate
Speaker 2: kind are. And they use Hershey's chocolate. That's pretty wild.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it ain't milk chocolate because this just cocoa.
Speaker 2: I just did it.
Speaker 1: It didn't come by So I was, you know before
Speaker 1: a couple like last month I saw them on Amazon.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh fuck, I love I haven't had
Speaker 1: one of those in a while. They don't sell them
Speaker 1: out here. They saw regular Twizzlers and other kinds, but
Speaker 1: not chocolate. So I ordered them through Amazon and they
Speaker 1: were fucking The tastes like a happy childhood. So when
Speaker 1: I was back East, I went into food town on
Speaker 1: the street then a fucking just like like you would
Speaker 1: sell milk, eggs or fucking floor cleaner, Like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: we got chalk. You have no fucking idea what you
Speaker 1: got here? This is gold back bottom hole.
Speaker 2: How many I brought?
Speaker 1: I think twenty six pound of Twizzlers?
Speaker 2: Are you Oh my god? You brought them back from Jersey.
Speaker 1: I had brought a suitcase full of ship to the
Speaker 1: podcastle I had to bring the suitcase home, so I
Speaker 1: was like, I got plenty of room for Twizzlers. Oh
Speaker 1: so I brought back to Twizzers. I also brought back
Speaker 1: grand Grandma. Mamily has been trying to give me for
Speaker 1: the last ship a few months since I've been out
Speaker 1: there visiting and whatnot a set of boxing gloves that mine.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I've been hearing about the I got him.
Speaker 1: I brought those home in the suitcases well well, which
Speaker 1: also came with a bunch of articles in the newspapers.
Speaker 1: About him boxing.
Speaker 2: It was crazy, really cool.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's fascinating and they're sitting there reading about this
Speaker 1: guy fucking like throwing hands in the thirties.
Speaker 2: Is your grandpapaly my mom's dad.
Speaker 1: But my mom was adopted. But you know, whatever, the well,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying, like he is, uh, you know, the
Speaker 1: blood is thicker than the water.
Speaker 2: Oh, I am aware.
Speaker 1: It was real, Like there's a real blood thing fucking
Speaker 1: in our in my house. And I think that had
Speaker 1: a lot to do with my mom being adopted. But
Speaker 1: for those who came in late, my father once made
Speaker 1: a mistake on Christmas Eve. I'm saying to my mother
Speaker 1: my father's brother was going to come visit. And it
Speaker 1: was like nine ten o'clock on Christmas night, night of
Speaker 1: Christmas and my father answer the phone, which he never did,
Speaker 1: and he to see him talk on the phone was
Speaker 1: like a nathma. He got phone. My mom was like
Speaker 1: so puzzled, like who is that? And he's like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's Wayne. He's going to stop by. He's in the area.
Speaker 1: He's gonna step by, and my Mom's like, no, he's not.
Speaker 1: And my dad's like, well, yeah, Wayne is my dad's
Speaker 1: younger brother. And my mom goes, no, the kids are
Speaker 1: all on their pajamas, Christmas is over. He can't step by.
Speaker 1: And God's like, well he's this is my brother. Yeah
Speaker 1: he's gonna stop but yeah, of course he can stop by.
Speaker 1: And you know, Mom pushed the issue, you know, in
Speaker 1: terms of like no, because mom, you know, dad was
Speaker 1: the breadwinner. My mom ran the house, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. My dad worked for mom essentially. And then
Speaker 1: my dad made the fucking incredible mistake error unforced era
Speaker 1: error of saying, well, blood is thicker than water grace
Speaker 1: in reference to his brother. Now, my dad meant it
Speaker 1: like Wayne is my brother and he's my blood. We're
Speaker 1: just married for Heaven's sake, which is insulting enough. However, Mom,
Speaker 1: being adopted, took that even fucking harder. And I didn't
Speaker 1: even know that when I was a kid. I didn't
Speaker 1: find out she was adopted to I was like eighteen.
Speaker 1: One day she told me.
Speaker 2: I was like, what really?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 1: And I wish she hadn't told me because it really
Speaker 1: did change my perspective.
Speaker 2: Why.
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, I don't I think because I
Speaker 1: was raised in a real blood, it's thicker than water
Speaker 1: cut of house, which is weird because Judy one of
Speaker 1: my favorite fucking relatives on the planet. We're not related,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like, Judy fucking helped raise
Speaker 1: you when you were born, and she helped raise me
Speaker 1: when I was a kid, but her mom were childhood friends. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so you know it's not like, you know, I can't.
Speaker 1: I can't get over somebody whose family that's not blood.
Speaker 1: But for some reason, and I'm not saying it was
Speaker 1: a good thing, and it is heartbreaking for me because
Speaker 1: I was very close with my grandmother, my mom's mom,
Speaker 1: who I lived with for a while after my grandfather
Speaker 1: passed away. When my mom told me she was adopted,
Speaker 1: suddenly I was like, I don't have to go to
Speaker 1: any of these people's houses anymore, Like we're not related
Speaker 1: to relatives and stuff.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: And that I didn't. I didn't. I didn't feel too
Speaker 1: bad about extended family, but I did feel bad that
Speaker 1: I ever felt. I didn't feel that in full to
Speaker 1: my grandmother, but I did feel like a chasm for
Speaker 1: some reason, like and my mother, nothing changed except suddenly
Speaker 1: I was like, well, wait.
Speaker 2: A second, that's interesting. Yeah, I don't know, and it.
Speaker 1: It has to come from that whole blood is thicker
Speaker 1: than water thing. But yeah, it's a very clear distinction
Speaker 1: with me and not a bias. But it's just like like, oh,
Speaker 1: those relatives that were not related to I mean, look,
Speaker 1: you always have relatives you're not related to, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, usually by marriage and shit like that.
Speaker 1: But this was a case of like I grew up
Speaker 1: around and with people that I assumed were blood relations family,
Speaker 1: and you know, granted, of course family can be family
Speaker 1: doesn't have to share blood. But this was a different time.
Speaker 1: This was like, that's again, blood is thicker than water.
Speaker 2: It's so crazy it is. I would never No, I
Speaker 2: didn't get any get any of that.
Speaker 1: One of your closest relationships with anyone in the world,
Speaker 1: let alone a relative, is with somebody that has no
Speaker 1: relation to us blood wise, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: Like Pop, that's like, for all intents and purposes, blood wise,
Speaker 1: genetically speaking, Pop is a stranger. Like there were times
Speaker 1: when I would walk around the most.
Speaker 2: Important stranger in the world.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's it. It's the story of family right there,
Speaker 1: Like fucking here's a guy who's not fucking blood but
Speaker 1: like I put him right next to me in terms
Speaker 1: of like somebody who shares blood with you, who is
Speaker 1: constantly looking out for your best interest. Oh yeah he's
Speaker 1: and you know, shamefully, I would have to admit there
Speaker 1: were times where Pop probably put you before I put
Speaker 1: you because I was like having to work or do
Speaker 1: a fucking thing instead. Pop was pasted his career and
Speaker 1: he was in retirement, so you know, he had this
Speaker 1: and still remains has a fantastic relationship with kid. We're
Speaker 1: so close, super close, but by my childhood metric. And
Speaker 1: again I'm not laying this on anybody, going like because
Speaker 1: this is what I was told, But it was just
Speaker 1: the that the blood is thicker than water stayed with me,
Speaker 1: and that sentiment like I didn't finish the story, my
Speaker 1: mom got so fucking pissed, he went and put a
Speaker 1: fist through the fucking wall.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it stayed.
Speaker 1: That hole stayed in the wall for over ten years,
Speaker 1: if not fifteen.
Speaker 2: It really matters what you hear when you're a kid.
Speaker 2: It really what's yours?
Speaker 1: What is your blood is thicker than water?
Speaker 2: Oh my god, you like fucking hold my beard.
Speaker 1: But our mind is very clear, like a very specific
Speaker 1: moment in time, a thing that was said, not even
Speaker 1: about me, like I wasn't engaged in the conversation, but
Speaker 1: it was watching the two people I trust most in
Speaker 1: the world have this kind of that was a huge moment, idiological,
Speaker 1: you know, and not like. And my parents also never
Speaker 1: they might bicker, but they were never, like, never really fought.
Speaker 2: As if you put a hole in the wall too,
Speaker 2: I'd be like, that'd be a core memory. Did you
Speaker 2: see her put a hole in the wall?
Speaker 1: Heard it? We were all in the living room. My
Speaker 1: mom stormed ashes. I'm like, I could see the rage still,
Speaker 1: like I was a child, and I could still see
Speaker 1: her face, like if she could have, she would have
Speaker 1: fucking right hooked the.
Speaker 2: Damn And my mom was tough, man.
Speaker 1: My mom was a tough little bit like she was
Speaker 1: raised by my grandma and her fucking sister was a
Speaker 1: nark detective, first female NERD detective. And she was in
Speaker 1: a rape squad like my mom was. That's what it
Speaker 1: was called. No, I know, but I know it's tough word. Sorry,
Speaker 1: grape squat. My My mom was was a fucking tough individual.
Speaker 1: Why am I saying this?
Speaker 3: Though?
Speaker 1: I got lost in my point.
Speaker 2: Because I was just her putting a hole in the wall,
Speaker 2: and you heard it, yes, So.
Speaker 1: The rage on her fucking face at blood is thicker
Speaker 1: than water, Like I if she if we weren't in
Speaker 1: the room, she might have fucking through hands like.
Speaker 2: She she was.
Speaker 1: Beyond incense. Stormed out of the room and then wow,
Speaker 1: I just heard that, and fucking everybody froze, and my
Speaker 1: dad goes to the kitchen angle and my brother and
Speaker 1: sister like you. Yeah. My mom went into the bedroom,
Speaker 1: slammed the door, and I went in around the corner,
Speaker 1: and I was looking and I saw the bedroom doors
Speaker 1: closed and bathroom door was open, so she was definitely
Speaker 1: in the bedroom. And then I looked at and the
Speaker 1: plaque that's right, and she the plaque that used to
Speaker 1: hang here in the house of like the baby plate
Speaker 1: when I was born. How much I weighed and ship
Speaker 1: Donald's I believe it was was on the ground. She
Speaker 1: had hit the wall so fucking hard that this like
Speaker 1: came off the nail and fell on the ground. So
Speaker 1: that was the first thing I saw. But then I
Speaker 1: looked over and the wall that was right outside our bedroom,
Speaker 1: she had put her fucking fist like through it and
Speaker 1: I came back out, I was like, the wall, that's
Speaker 1: so crazy, and that it's it ain't like this house
Speaker 1: where it's like, you know, we got a lot of
Speaker 1: space in this house. So if you want to fight
Speaker 1: with somebody, meaning if you want to avoid something, buddy,
Speaker 1: you can go to another angle of the house and
Speaker 1: you know, I'm not like you won't see him for weeks,
Speaker 1: but like you don't have to run into them. Jackson
Speaker 1: Street was pretty fucking small. So could you imagine having
Speaker 1: a fucking blowout fight with your husband or your wife
Speaker 1: while the kids are there?
Speaker 2: That? Yeah, that's close quarters. Oh did you think about
Speaker 2: Momiy when you punched a hole in the wall one
Speaker 2: time when I was on cop outside? Yeah, did you
Speaker 2: think about Mommily?
Speaker 1: As I was like, Momiy is stronger. She put her
Speaker 1: fist through a wall in a house, which granted is
Speaker 1: like sheet rock and shit like that. But I was
Speaker 1: a trailer like so when I put my fist to
Speaker 1: the wall, so to speak, it was like balsa wood.
Speaker 1: That big deal.
Speaker 2: But I was I'm never that person.
Speaker 1: I'm not like a physical person. No, frustrated.
Speaker 2: I was just wondering if Momley crossed your mind that
Speaker 2: I remember telling you.
Speaker 1: I was like, ma, I got so angry. I put
Speaker 1: my fist to the wall three times. She goes, tiger
Speaker 1: only did it once.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because she had to. You were three short.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I put bang, bang, bang, put three holes in
Speaker 1: the wall. And Megan was out there and she was
Speaker 1: just like you all right. So I just punched a
Speaker 1: hole through the wall three times and she's like all right, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: So these boxing gloves, like it's crazy because I'm looking
Speaker 1: at him. And they got a guy his name was
Speaker 1: John Schultz. Uh, and he taught me out to tie
Speaker 1: my shoes. I've spoken about it before, Like he died
Speaker 1: when I was like nine, but like he was, he
Speaker 1: always called me captain.
Speaker 2: Hey, cap, you call everyone captain.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true. Maybe I got it from him, maybe,
Speaker 1: but he uh yeah. By the time I met him,
Speaker 1: mus long past fucking boxing and ship like that. He'd
Speaker 1: been like a janitor in the Newark court system for
Speaker 1: like a long time.
Speaker 2: So he uh.
Speaker 1: He came off like, you know, scary. He'd come off
Speaker 1: like nice and huggable, like pop. He came across like
Speaker 1: a like an old man from in his seventies. In
Speaker 1: the seventies, they were a different breed, not like a
Speaker 1: cute cut, not pop user friendly pop.
Speaker 2: Yeah he's so cute, yeah, pops.
Speaker 1: Pop's like a nerf ball. He just wanted to toss
Speaker 1: for which is fucking shocking because you know, Pop fucking
Speaker 1: had a horrible job where he saw incredibly horrific things.
Speaker 2: But he's just the cutest little guy.
Speaker 1: He's mister I'm telling you he's nerve because he's mister
Speaker 1: bounced back as.
Speaker 2: Well, like he really is. He's an incredible He.
Speaker 1: Would crush my people, like doesn't crush.
Speaker 2: It's truly incredible.
Speaker 1: But uh so, my grandfather was not. I remember one
Speaker 1: time I walked around the block with him from my
Speaker 1: grandmother's house to my house at tonym on Jackson Street,
Speaker 1: and he said he was going in and like, and
Speaker 1: they never really came around the block to our house.
Speaker 1: We always went around to their house, but I said,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say out here, staying on the front steps,
Speaker 1: and so he goes inside, and for some reason, like
Speaker 1: I was like all right, and I left and I
Speaker 1: walked around the block to Grandma's and I knew this
Speaker 1: was that, Like I didn't tell anybody or anything like that,
Speaker 1: so I immediately got into the bathroom. I went into
Speaker 1: my grandma's house, went right into the bathroom. She goes,
Speaker 1: where's your Where's where's Grandpa? I was like, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I went into the bathroom, and ten minutes later he
Speaker 1: came fucking blowing through the front door in that place,
Speaker 1: going is Kevin in the here? And my grandmother was like,
Speaker 1: he's in the bathroom and goes Jesus whic like, and
Speaker 1: he wanted to fucking strangle me, because, as you would
Speaker 1: imagine once you're past, you know, the panic of I
Speaker 1: lost my grandchild, like he was right here, like I
Speaker 1: wanted to And my mom must have been like, where's Kevin?
Speaker 1: And my grandfather was like, he was just he was
Speaker 1: with me, what do you that whole fucking run around
Speaker 1: the block, assuming that I went there, hoping that I
Speaker 1: went there. You know, it ain't like today where you know,
Speaker 1: if that would have happened, you find a kid like, oh,
Speaker 1: thank God, give me a hugging ship. Motherfucker was ready
Speaker 1: to put me through a wall because I fucking terrified him.
Speaker 1: And you're like, and my grandma was like, you're not,
Speaker 1: don't go near him. He didn't do anything wrong. He's
Speaker 1: like he left and didn't tell anybody like that's that
Speaker 1: is wrong, Like, oh.
Speaker 2: Man, that's terrifying for them.
Speaker 1: I mean for me, I was scared to get yeah,
Speaker 1: but like.
Speaker 2: Sounds terrifying for you too though, but more for them,
Speaker 2: like could you imagine that?
Speaker 1: Motherfucker's Like I like that they entrusted me with this
Speaker 1: kid for two minutes, and like it's not even like
Speaker 1: whether or not he like loved me or was into
Speaker 1: me as a fucking human being who gives a shit.
Speaker 1: It just meant I'm never going to hear the end
Speaker 1: of it. For my wife, like she's gonna fuck it.
Speaker 1: He called her head names for all the time. He
Speaker 1: called their Kaiser. Now, in your world, Kaiser is like
Speaker 1: Kaiser permanente. But back in World War One, the Kaiser
Speaker 1: Kaiser Wilhelm was like the head of Germany is the
Speaker 1: reason we got into well where they got into World
Speaker 1: War One. Kaiser's were bad things. They were like fucking yeah,
Speaker 1: you didn't want to be a Kaiser. So my grandfather's
Speaker 1: nickname for my grandmother was Kaiser.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: So he would just be like, oh, Kaiser, shut up,
Speaker 1: like constantly, oh my god, referring to her germanness, even
Speaker 1: though he too was German.
Speaker 2: He was Schultz Wow, and she was went w and
Speaker 2: dt getting some insight into your childhood again. He uh.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure I've talked about this before, but
Speaker 1: like him being a boxer, and I read these articles
Speaker 1: and it's crazy how they talk about like how good
Speaker 1: he was at it. And it's also crazy that you're
Speaker 1: reading something from the thirties and it's not that different
Speaker 1: from how they cover sports today.
Speaker 2: That's pretty crazy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, But them talking about this youngster from fucking the
Speaker 1: iron Bound section of North and how he handled himself
Speaker 1: in a fight, it's crazy because I'm like, this guy's
Speaker 1: journey makes my journey possible. Like never mind, the whole
Speaker 1: fucking blood is thicker than water. If this boxer hadn't failed,
Speaker 1: maybe he's never around New jerseybe they move outageurs.
Speaker 2: And so.
Speaker 1: My mom, who was like, you know, brought to my
Speaker 1: grandparents by the Catholic charities, doesn't go to that family.
Speaker 1: That family who you know, My grandfather and my grandmother
Speaker 1: bought a little bungalow down the Jersey Shore and they
Speaker 1: would go there on the weekends and stuff, and then
Speaker 1: eventually moved down there and my parents were visiting with
Speaker 1: my sister when she was a kid, and my dad
Speaker 1: walked around the block with my sister and saw a
Speaker 1: house for some I was like, oh my god, we
Speaker 1: could live near your parents if you want, grace, and
Speaker 1: she was like yeah, And so then we go to
Speaker 1: twenty on Jackson Street. All because that guy fought well,
Speaker 1: but not well enough to sustain it as an entire career.
Speaker 1: Because I guarantee you if that man continued his life
Speaker 1: as the man in the Arena as they say, he
Speaker 1: wasn't gonna be fucking adopted, no no kid from the
Speaker 1: Catholic charities. You know what I'm saying is that's when
Speaker 1: I read those articles, I'm like, this guy had he
Speaker 1: and he he had no idea I was coming. And
Speaker 1: even when he met me, even when I walked around
Speaker 1: the block and he was like, oh my god, even
Speaker 1: when he taught me at a time my shoe, he
Speaker 1: had no idea that I was going to become the
Speaker 1: man in the arena, that I would spend my life
Speaker 1: chasing like the words in the paper, like he did,
Speaker 1: like needing validation provided by anyone other than ourselves. You know,
Speaker 1: maybe he did it for a different reason, you know,
Speaker 1: but ultimately you're trying to fill some fucking hole. So
Speaker 1: he he must have been. I mean, I'm sure part
Speaker 1: of it was the money, right, like should I'd rather
Speaker 1: make money fighting than doing anything else. In the passion, yeah,
Speaker 1: passion for the fight game. But then he gave it up.
Speaker 1: This is something I talk about all the time, and
Speaker 1: I can't believe we haven't spoken about it. I spoke
Speaker 1: about it with nominally that that guy had pretty good record.
Speaker 1: And then my grandmother story goes and the family history
Speaker 1: of my grandmother was like, you know, he can't do
Speaker 1: this anymore. You have a daughter now, like their first kid,
Speaker 1: my A Virginia was born while my grandfather was boxing
Speaker 1: on the road and he was in Virginia when he
Speaker 1: found out that my grandmother had the baby. So he
Speaker 1: was like, let's name it Virginia. So he got home.
Speaker 1: My grandma was like, you're done fighting like your dad now,
Speaker 1: Like I can't. You weren't here, and the kid was born,
Speaker 1: like god, this is it, and you know, the story
Speaker 1: was like he was like okay, then gave it up.
Speaker 1: Now having been the man in the arena for thirty
Speaker 1: fucking odd years now, thirty one years. There's nothing in
Speaker 1: the world that would make you willingly give up the
Speaker 1: roar of the crowd if you were built for that,
Speaker 1: which clearly he was as he gravitated towards the fight came.
Speaker 1: So as a kid, you know, I buy that story,
Speaker 1: like fucking she told him not to fight anymore and
Speaker 1: that's his wife, so stop. But as an adult who
Speaker 1: had a career, you know, definitely not like my grandfather's
Speaker 1: but like also in a public eye where part of
Speaker 1: your job comes with accolade, and when it comes to
Speaker 1: that sort of shit, like you know, fucking people in sports,
Speaker 1: like oh my god, the crowds go nuts. Like I'm
Speaker 1: happy when I'm at a comedy club. I can make
Speaker 1: a room laugh. But like fucking punch a dude in
Speaker 1: the face and dropping the canvas and talking, you know,
Speaker 1: primal and ship like that.
Speaker 2: Pretty impressive.
Speaker 1: What would make a man give all that up? His child?
Speaker 1: Mm hmm, I had one. I didn't give it up
Speaker 1: so true where you were, Yes, my.
Speaker 2: Boy, it was just like me.
Speaker 1: What would make a man give all that up? It
Speaker 1: ain't fucking his wife going like you got to stop
Speaker 1: fighting out you have a kid. I have theory.
Speaker 2: I bet it has something to do with anal. I
Speaker 2: think my grandmother was fantastic and anal. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I think it was like the fucking forties, which she
Speaker 1: was a German girl who was like, I'll let you
Speaker 1: do it to style you font. I mean, she'd actual god,
Speaker 1: and he was.
Speaker 2: Just like, Oh, what's better than the fight game?
Speaker 1: Is this? I think? So I'd really like to go
Speaker 1: back in time and have a conversation.
Speaker 2: I just wondering about Adson.
Speaker 1: Just as like some rando, I just be like, did
Speaker 1: you give a fighting for anal? My grandfather was a
Speaker 1: vicious man who fought in traffic.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: He would stop somebody was delegating him. He would stop
Speaker 1: a car on the freeway, get out and grab a
Speaker 1: fucking hook from under the seat, like one of those like, uh,
Speaker 1: I know what you did last summer hooks there used
Speaker 1: for fishing fish, and he would go. He would He
Speaker 1: was a fucking boxer. The man was naturally fucking aggressive,
Speaker 1: so he had a hair trigger and had no problem
Speaker 1: fucking getting ready to fuck with anybody even when, like
Speaker 1: I knew him when he was like in the seventies
Speaker 1: and shit like that. That I was kind of scared
Speaker 1: of this guy, always ready to throw it down.
Speaker 2: Sound scary, Yeah, he was terrifying actually.
Speaker 1: But to be fair, like I remember him always trying.
Speaker 1: Like you got to remember when we came into their lives, me,
Speaker 1: my brother, and my sister. Like my grandmother was, you know,
Speaker 1: now an older woman. She spent most of her young
Speaker 1: life raising kids and then raising her kids kids because
Speaker 1: like my Virginia was off at work and stuff, and
Speaker 1: Uncle Jerry was off at work. So she had Virginia,
Speaker 1: Rosemary and Gerard, my aunt, my uncle Joe's kids. She
Speaker 1: raised them from time to time as well, and like
Speaker 1: all these people report her as being like, you know,
Speaker 1: I what a stern heart ass, Like I fucking hated
Speaker 1: fucking going to Grandma because she just what a nut batter.
Speaker 1: And we didn't have that version of grandma. My grandma
Speaker 1: love the funk out of was because she was like,
Speaker 1: I'm done, like I don't have to raise these kids
Speaker 1: like now I just get to have fun with these kids.
Speaker 2: And then one day you just stop talking. Don't do that.
Speaker 1: I didn't know that's I did not stop talking to her.
Speaker 1: I just didn't feel quite as compelled to, you know,
Speaker 1: to go over all the time, but also came hand
Speaker 1: to him at a time with it.
Speaker 2: When I would go over and.
Speaker 1: You know, sit down with her and she, you know,
Speaker 1: she'd lost her eyesight, so she like couldn't do any
Speaker 1: of the things she'd doing like cooking or crushang and stuff.
Speaker 1: And you know, I'd be like, how you doing, Graham,
Speaker 1: and She'd be like, well, I keep asking him to
Speaker 1: take me, but he won't do it. Jesus, I keep
Speaker 1: begging him take me. I'm still here. And that became gosh,
Speaker 1: very difficult to like, you know, be like Graham, you know,
Speaker 1: come on. But what everyone she knew and loved was
Speaker 1: dead or dying off. She couldn't see anymore, so she
Speaker 1: couldn't even be the independent person she had been since
Speaker 1: her husband died like twenty years prior and stuff. She
Speaker 1: couldn't go out do anything anymore. So she she got sad.
Speaker 2: That's really sad.
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is a woman who was always like so
Speaker 1: crazy full of life.
Speaker 2: Yea, yeah, oh my god, this is such a sad one.
Speaker 1: Nobody is ever going to listen to the show anymore,
Speaker 1: and they shouldn't.
Speaker 2: All right, Uh, yeah, it got very real that dude, I.
Speaker 1: Suspect gave up boxing because my grandmother was just hella,
Speaker 1: wicked in bed, willing to do things that no other,
Speaker 1: you know, woman in that age would do. That's why
Speaker 1: I think anal because anyone with anyone, but they've always
Speaker 1: had sex. But I think I think she was like
Speaker 1: I brought something back from Jersey, from Daspozland, and you're
Speaker 1: gonna like get kid Dixie. That was his name, k Dixie,
Speaker 1: kid Dixie. Oh yeah, weird because he wasn't from the South.
Speaker 1: Dixie is usually associated with South. But yeah, it was
Speaker 1: Kid Dixie Schultz.
Speaker 2: Wow, that's a that's a pretty solid name right there.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was a boxing name. Maybe that maybe there's
Speaker 1: your band name, Kid Dixie. I was, and it has
Speaker 1: this like it'll make people be like, oh ship man,
Speaker 1: I love Dixie music and then hear it like you
Speaker 1: take some music, but they already roped in at that point.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so true. Yeah, you know you have a point.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying. So that wraps up the vegan average one.
Speaker 2: We're doing really well at the categories.
Speaker 1: So terrible. See, I've had podcast co hosts for years,
Speaker 1: like Ralph is very good at departments because when he
Speaker 1: was on k Rock Radio is all about departments. So
Speaker 1: Ralph keeps like Hollywood Babylon like on the rails and
Speaker 1: constantly have stuff for each department.
Speaker 2: I'm just along for the ride. So as long as
Speaker 2: you you're driving.
Speaker 1: Nobody's driving. This is like one of them cars that
Speaker 1: just drives itself.
Speaker 2: Apparently. I mean, it makes a lot of sense, But
Speaker 2: that's just a thing that happens in major cities the
Speaker 2: way most d Yeah that's not everywhere yet, Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: and it's just become a regular thing where there are
Speaker 2: just cars that are driving themselves and tell us for
Speaker 2: years that it's coming. It's truly shocking. Every single time
Speaker 2: I see one one yeah happens, it's terrifying.
Speaker 1: What unnerves your mother is the little delivery. She can't
Speaker 1: stand them. She's like, eh, there's another one. I was
Speaker 1: like this one. She's like, oh my god, I can
Speaker 1: oh my there was one that was stuck in the
Speaker 1: middle of a a crosswalk and I finally saw some
Speaker 1: compassion for my god, we got to help it. We
Speaker 1: are not going to help get out of an object
Speaker 1: that's being controlled by somebody in a basement because they're
Speaker 1: they're not They're not like AI.
Speaker 2: They're not you know, people are driving them. Yeah really yeah,
Speaker 2: they're like.
Speaker 1: Drones, the land drones essentially, So there's some somewhere someone
Speaker 1: just sitting there watching it and ship like that. So yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, wow, it takes kind of the oh look
Speaker 1: at the little robot out of it and just makes
Speaker 1: it because I never feel that about a drone. I'm
Speaker 1: not like the same thing for for the delivery droid.
Speaker 2: There's the delivery droid.
Speaker 1: This guy controlling it.
Speaker 2: Wow, it's the Wizard, that's for real.
Speaker 1: The way when when you follow him all the way
Speaker 1: back to the convenience store and ship like that. Whenever
Speaker 1: he's delivering from the little delivery droid, you meet the
Speaker 1: fucking wizard and he's like Harley Quinn.
Speaker 2: I'd like to raise y'ah ah because I think everyone deserves.
Speaker 1: A chance to birdie commercial all right before we fucking
Speaker 1: cry anymore.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Will got so many redo the departments next time,
Speaker 2: getting better, figured it out, Figure it out. We figured
Speaker 2: out departments.
Speaker 1: Don't forget kids, love it or leave it so true
Speaker 1: at Dynasty Typewriter Thursday night meaning this third meaning tonight.
Speaker 1: If you're listening to this on Thursday, if you listen
Speaker 1: to this on Friday. You fucked up.
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Speaker 2: What that episode? Yeah, it's like that, like that, you gotta.
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Speaker 2: Name, Kevin Smith Robers was.
Speaker 1: A fucking he was a poet, a prophet. Wow, yeah,
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Speaker 2: Like, absolutely, it's his clerks.
Speaker 1: And the.
Speaker 2: My's delusional. How let's go.
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