WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en-GB 00:00:08.340 --> 00:00:12.540 I'm Travis Bader, and this is the Silvercore podcast. 00:00:13.979 --> 00:00:17.940 Silvercore has been providing its members with the skills and knowledge 00:00:17.970 --> 00:00:22.800 necessary to be confident and proficient in the outdoors for over 20 years, and 00:00:22.800 --> 00:00:26.790 we make it easier for people to deepen their connection to the natural world. 00:00:27.720 --> 00:00:32.970 If you enjoy the positive and educational content we provide, please let others 00:00:32.970 --> 00:00:37.740 know by sharing, commenting, and following so that you can join in on 00:00:37.830 --> 00:00:39.630 everything that silver horse stands for. 00:00:40.710 --> 00:00:43.350 If you'd like to learn more about becoming a member of the 00:00:43.350 --> 00:00:48.140 Silvercore Club and community, visit our website at Silvercoer.ca 00:00:51.960 --> 00:00:53.490 back by popular demand. 00:00:53.730 --> 00:00:58.920 Recently retired 20 year ERCP veteran, 17 of those years on tactical teams, 00:00:58.980 --> 00:01:03.090 four and a half years with a Colbert section seven years team leader of the 00:01:03.090 --> 00:01:05.069 lower mainland emergency response team. 00:01:05.820 --> 00:01:10.530 Two years divisional Sergeant major for BC last podcast. 00:01:10.530 --> 00:01:13.230 That'd be silver four podcast episode 55. 00:01:13.650 --> 00:01:18.060 I started by butchering your name, but I ended with a feeling 00:01:18.060 --> 00:01:19.590 of reconnecting with a loss from. 00:01:20.490 --> 00:01:24.090 Welcome back to the Silvercore Podcast of Lavoie. 00:01:24.900 --> 00:01:25.980 Thank you for having me. 00:01:25.980 --> 00:01:27.960 And by the way, the math doesn't add up here. 00:01:27.960 --> 00:01:29.490 So there's some self with 00:01:29.490 --> 00:01:31.230 this, these numbers. 00:01:31.830 --> 00:01:34.620 I pulled this all from the internet, so 00:01:35.340 --> 00:01:36.270 it was on the internet. 00:01:36.270 --> 00:01:37.050 It must be true. 00:01:38.790 --> 00:01:42.300 Um, I figured I'd just get all of the main points out of the way to begin 00:01:42.300 --> 00:01:46.170 with and anybody who wants to listen in greater detail, all of that can go 00:01:46.170 --> 00:01:51.330 back to episode 55 because I was a very popular podcast, very powerful, a lot 00:01:51.330 --> 00:01:52.830 of really good information in there. 00:01:53.550 --> 00:01:58.950 And in this podcast, I was really hoping we'd be able to do a few things. 00:01:59.040 --> 00:02:02.940 One a lot has happened in your life since we spoke last, a 00:02:02.940 --> 00:02:04.350 lot of really exciting things. 00:02:04.950 --> 00:02:09.720 And number two, you've been on a number of podcasts. 00:02:10.110 --> 00:02:16.710 You have had the opportunity to grow as an orator to be able to, 00:02:17.100 --> 00:02:19.410 uh, express yourself with others. 00:02:19.410 --> 00:02:24.420 But quite often, what happens is a podcaster will act as an interviewer and 00:02:24.420 --> 00:02:27.120 they'll ask questions of their guests. 00:02:27.150 --> 00:02:31.560 And I, sometimes there's a two-way flow of communication that goes back and forth. 00:02:31.560 --> 00:02:33.060 Sometimes it's really one way. 00:02:33.120 --> 00:02:37.560 And if people are just meeting you for the first time, they tend to focus on 00:02:37.560 --> 00:02:39.840 the same things over and over again. 00:02:40.470 --> 00:02:42.060 And if we're to treat podcasts. 00:02:42.870 --> 00:02:47.640 As something that we can use to get better in our own lives, 00:02:47.640 --> 00:02:48.840 sorta like go into the gym. 00:02:48.840 --> 00:02:52.049 If you do the same exercises over and over again, you're not really 00:02:52.049 --> 00:02:54.060 growing, you're not pushing yourself. 00:02:54.060 --> 00:02:57.390 So maybe we can push past some of the common things that people 00:02:57.390 --> 00:03:00.810 may be new about, use some of the myths or misconceptions. 00:03:00.899 --> 00:03:04.320 And, uh, see if we can both grow in this episode. 00:03:04.920 --> 00:03:06.239 Sounds like an ambush. 00:03:08.670 --> 00:03:09.329 Well, okay. 00:03:09.329 --> 00:03:15.269 So a lot's happened to you since we talked last, uh, first one I'm 00:03:15.269 --> 00:03:18.780 really excited to talk about is something that's really positive. 00:03:18.899 --> 00:03:22.920 I'm watching on your Instagram feed and it looks like you've 00:03:22.920 --> 00:03:24.930 got something in the works here. 00:03:25.230 --> 00:03:26.399 Something that you're building. 00:03:26.459 --> 00:03:27.899 Do you want to talk about this? 00:03:28.920 --> 00:03:29.220 Yeah. 00:03:29.220 --> 00:03:32.730 I mean, there's, I'm constantly building something, right? 00:03:32.730 --> 00:03:37.890 So it's, it's, it's, um, not unusual for me to have a few projects on the go. 00:03:38.280 --> 00:03:44.910 Uh, there's the benefit of having retired from the RCMP so that I can take on 00:03:44.910 --> 00:03:46.709 to things that are meaningful to me. 00:03:47.519 --> 00:03:52.230 And, uh, and that's what my company Raven's strategic has been all about. 00:03:52.230 --> 00:03:54.630 And people are asking, you know, what do you do specifically? 00:03:54.630 --> 00:03:55.440 I'm like, well, it depends. 00:03:56.160 --> 00:03:57.359 What do I want to do? 00:03:57.450 --> 00:04:00.239 And then my company is the umbrella to it, you know? 00:04:00.809 --> 00:04:04.230 And so I've had, uh, you know, a variety of different pursuits. 00:04:04.290 --> 00:04:08.220 And I think the one you're probably referring to is, um, a 00:04:08.220 --> 00:04:09.869 book project that I'm working on. 00:04:11.489 --> 00:04:11.790 Yeah. 00:04:11.790 --> 00:04:16.440 So a book project that I'm working on with, uh, an, uh, another, uh, 00:04:17.159 --> 00:04:21.240 amazing individual by the name of Sean Taylor, who's, um, you know, a 00:04:21.240 --> 00:04:26.880 retired Pathfinder's second commando joint task force, two assaulter 00:04:26.900 --> 00:04:30.900 team leaders, sniper, you know, just a, an overall incredible man. 00:04:31.530 --> 00:04:36.360 Um, he's also, you know, a coach that's coached world champs in, in, 00:04:36.360 --> 00:04:40.560 in mountain biking and downhill, downhill racing or extended. 00:04:40.590 --> 00:04:42.840 I can't remember like long distance racing or something. 00:04:43.380 --> 00:04:48.930 Um, anyways, just an amazing orator and an amazing, um, human. 00:04:49.140 --> 00:04:51.870 And so we've been working on this book project together, which 00:04:51.870 --> 00:04:55.530 has been absolutely exciting. 00:04:55.560 --> 00:04:57.060 We cannot wait to push it out. 00:04:57.539 --> 00:05:03.330 So he's bringing military top to your special forces background into this book. 00:05:03.360 --> 00:05:07.440 And you're bringing talk to your law enforcement background into 00:05:07.440 --> 00:05:09.630 the book is, is, is that yeah, 00:05:09.659 --> 00:05:10.320 absolutely. 00:05:10.320 --> 00:05:14.070 And I mean, the book, the target audience is everybody that's in 00:05:14.070 --> 00:05:19.440 pursuit of excellence and, and, and some of our experiences in our own 00:05:19.440 --> 00:05:22.110 pursuit of excellence in, and how. 00:05:24.735 --> 00:05:30.195 If I was, if I was to put it into words, just imagine if you are putting 00:05:30.195 --> 00:05:33.175 all your eggs in the same basket and you were pursuing a, you're a single, 00:05:33.195 --> 00:05:38.385 single singularly minded to one goal to go somewhere and be at the tip of the 00:05:38.385 --> 00:05:42.585 spear along the way, our casualties, those casualties may be, you know, 00:05:42.595 --> 00:05:44.565 family, they may be other endeavors. 00:05:44.565 --> 00:05:46.925 You might have be you, you could have benefited from, or, 00:05:46.925 --> 00:05:48.135 or whatever the case may be. 00:05:48.135 --> 00:05:54.375 So as people that, um, ended exactly where we wanted to be in terms of 00:05:54.375 --> 00:05:56.625 career, there was a cost to this. 00:05:56.625 --> 00:05:59.565 And what we are, what we're doing is we're looking back going. 00:05:59.565 --> 00:06:02.745 I wish I knew this when I was 20, you know, like I'm 45 years old. 00:06:02.745 --> 00:06:03.075 Now. 00:06:03.585 --> 00:06:06.765 I wish I could go back in time and speak to my 20 year old self 00:06:07.185 --> 00:06:10.995 and see where I could have avoided some of those traps, you know? 00:06:10.995 --> 00:06:15.105 And so our that's exactly, and that's precisely what we are bringing, how 00:06:15.105 --> 00:06:20.775 to pursue excellence, but mitigate the risk associated with that pursuit. 00:06:20.895 --> 00:06:21.915 If that makes any sense, 00:06:22.095 --> 00:06:22.935 it makes a ton of sense. 00:06:22.935 --> 00:06:22.995 Yeah. 00:06:23.325 --> 00:06:26.685 You know, I've always said what a man thinks he will do. 00:06:27.525 --> 00:06:32.115 If you want to do something, you could make it happen when you get 00:06:32.115 --> 00:06:33.915 to the finish line and the goals. 00:06:34.755 --> 00:06:38.355 And you look back, did the ends justify the means. 00:06:38.415 --> 00:06:41.895 And that's a question that people have to ask themselves to, to approach that 00:06:41.895 --> 00:06:48.405 with the, uh, the knowledge ahead of time is invaluable knowing that, okay. 00:06:48.435 --> 00:06:51.585 Yeah, there are things that will suffer if I want to push. 00:06:51.705 --> 00:06:54.855 If I think that money is a worthwhile endeavor for me, and I really 00:06:54.855 --> 00:06:59.415 want to have lots of money, I'll have lots of money, but my family 00:06:59.415 --> 00:07:01.305 life might suffer my friends. 00:07:01.305 --> 00:07:02.505 I might not be seeing them. 00:07:02.905 --> 00:07:06.975 I might not be learning a musical instrument or doing any of these 00:07:06.975 --> 00:07:10.965 other things that outside may be in the shop woodworking or metalworking. 00:07:11.295 --> 00:07:14.565 I might put all of that stuff aside, so my can single-mindedly 00:07:14.565 --> 00:07:15.855 pursue that one endeavor. 00:07:16.605 --> 00:07:18.495 So, okay. 00:07:20.655 --> 00:07:25.515 Obviously, obviously you've achieved some pretty great things 00:07:25.515 --> 00:07:26.865 in this very short period of time. 00:07:26.895 --> 00:07:30.075 Things that a lot of people will look to and say, man, I wish I could do the same. 00:07:31.185 --> 00:07:33.585 And I think you would probably turn around and tell them, you can do 00:07:33.585 --> 00:07:36.105 the same if you put your head to it. 00:07:36.585 --> 00:07:41.595 But what would you tell your 20 year old self, if you were looking to getting into, 00:07:41.775 --> 00:07:46.215 uh, in your situation he wanted to, when you approach policing, you did so with the 00:07:46.215 --> 00:07:49.035 single-minded goal, you wanted to be hurt. 00:07:49.425 --> 00:07:53.115 You want it to be here at T what would you tell your 20 year old self? 00:07:53.295 --> 00:07:54.465 Is that a worthwhile endeavor? 00:07:55.620 --> 00:07:55.770 Oh, 00:07:55.770 --> 00:07:56.729 yeah, absolutely. 00:07:56.729 --> 00:08:01.380 In terms of having regrets, um, for the accomplishment themselves, 00:08:01.500 --> 00:08:03.150 no, that's never happened. 00:08:03.150 --> 00:08:06.539 And we know that there is a cost to sacrifice for the collective. 00:08:06.539 --> 00:08:09.030 So there is always going to be a cost. 00:08:09.180 --> 00:08:11.609 It's not like you can completely eliminate the cost that's 00:08:11.609 --> 00:08:13.049 associated with a life service. 00:08:13.830 --> 00:08:18.870 But what we are looking at is was there anywhere along the lines where I started 00:08:18.870 --> 00:08:24.750 blurring the lines myself, and self-impose some hardship that shouldn't have been, or 00:08:24.750 --> 00:08:29.490 to my, or self-imposed to myself or impose on my family or impose on my friends or 00:08:29.490 --> 00:08:31.289 my coworkers or whatever the case may be. 00:08:31.830 --> 00:08:36.750 And w w would there have been a way for me to achieve the same thing 00:08:36.780 --> 00:08:41.130 without leaving, you know, a trail of bodies along the way, so to speak. 00:08:41.130 --> 00:08:41.429 Right? 00:08:41.640 --> 00:08:45.870 And so for me, in terms of say my first marriage, and I mean, 00:08:46.140 --> 00:08:47.699 it, it is what it is in policing. 00:08:47.699 --> 00:08:52.530 The divorce rates are extremely high, but when I look back at some 00:08:52.530 --> 00:08:57.300 of my say, teammates that have an incredible family life and are 00:08:57.510 --> 00:09:03.780 sustaining their, their operations and are super competent operators, I look 00:09:03.780 --> 00:09:08.400 back and I'm like, okay, where did I go wrong with my family, with my. 00:09:09.225 --> 00:09:12.795 Wife where my, you know, and, and what can I learn from that? 00:09:12.795 --> 00:09:15.615 It is not to say that at the end of the day, I'd be looking back saying, 00:09:15.615 --> 00:09:20.505 well, I wish I stayed home, but I think would be surmised to think that 00:09:20.895 --> 00:09:25.485 I didn't do anything wrong as I was going through the system, through 00:09:25.485 --> 00:09:27.135 the pipeline, towards my goal. 00:09:27.165 --> 00:09:31.155 And then ultimately what it comes down to is we're always going somewhere. 00:09:31.185 --> 00:09:31.545 Right. 00:09:32.025 --> 00:09:35.115 But the problem is, is when you're going somewhere, sometimes you 00:09:35.115 --> 00:09:37.455 miss the entire journey and life. 00:09:37.455 --> 00:09:39.135 Isn't about the destination. 00:09:39.405 --> 00:09:40.665 It's about the journey. 00:09:40.875 --> 00:09:45.495 And so for me, I could have appreciated, there is no doubt in my mind that I 00:09:45.495 --> 00:09:51.015 could have, I could have appreciated the things that I've undertook over the years 00:09:51.645 --> 00:09:56.895 that were in line with my final goal, but would have made me appreciate the 00:09:56.895 --> 00:09:59.385 daily operation a lot better, you know? 00:09:59.385 --> 00:10:03.405 And so, so I, I kind of, I kind of feel like I spent so many years working 00:10:03.405 --> 00:10:07.215 as hard as I possibly could to get somewhere that I missed those years. 00:10:07.275 --> 00:10:08.445 If that makes any sense. 00:10:09.225 --> 00:10:10.155 It's a hell of a lot of sense. 00:10:10.155 --> 00:10:15.795 And actually, you know, a lot of people don't know this about me, but when I 00:10:15.795 --> 00:10:18.765 was 19 years old, I wanted to be SAS. 00:10:19.005 --> 00:10:20.625 I mean, that's, that's what I wanted. 00:10:20.625 --> 00:10:22.035 I've, I've read the books. 00:10:22.035 --> 00:10:23.925 I've talked to other people who were SAS. 00:10:23.925 --> 00:10:27.525 And I figured I, in order to get there, I need to join the British military 00:10:27.885 --> 00:10:31.935 and join the British army, get in, go through the, uh, the process. 00:10:31.995 --> 00:10:37.755 And so I was speaking with a recruiting officer recruiting office, Not a problem. 00:10:38.295 --> 00:10:41.025 You're part of the Commonwealth Canada, come on over. 00:10:41.025 --> 00:10:42.045 We can figure this out. 00:10:42.045 --> 00:10:42.885 We can get you in there. 00:10:43.155 --> 00:10:45.945 Just save up your money, get a ticket, come on over, have a bit of money 00:10:45.945 --> 00:10:48.885 saved aside because the process takes a while and you want to be able to, 00:10:49.455 --> 00:10:52.995 uh, not be living on the street while you're waiting for it to go through. 00:10:52.995 --> 00:10:58.935 So I did that, uh, 19 years old flew over to the UK, met up with the, uh, 00:10:58.965 --> 00:11:02.655 recruiting office and the fellow I was talking to had been transferred. 00:11:03.345 --> 00:11:08.625 Uh, I met with a woman there who said, I have no idea why this gentleman 00:11:08.655 --> 00:11:09.945 would tell you that you could do it. 00:11:10.315 --> 00:11:13.515 He said, I'm sure you can, but you can't do anything 00:11:13.515 --> 00:11:15.285 security related for five years. 00:11:15.675 --> 00:11:18.015 I said, okay, whatever, what's what's security related. 00:11:18.285 --> 00:11:21.015 And she says, well, why don't I show you what he isn't security related? 00:11:21.015 --> 00:11:24.615 And it was basically like a janitor and even some of the 00:11:24.615 --> 00:11:27.825 janitorial roles in certain areas was considered security related. 00:11:28.545 --> 00:11:29.955 I said, okay, five years. 00:11:29.955 --> 00:11:30.225 Huh? 00:11:30.615 --> 00:11:31.875 But I've got a, what was it? 00:11:31.875 --> 00:11:39.645 A, um, I think it was a minimum two year, uh, whatever the minimum engagement was. 00:11:39.645 --> 00:11:41.115 I figured, well, I'll give it a shot. 00:11:41.145 --> 00:11:41.455 Okay. 00:11:41.525 --> 00:11:41.835 Go ahead. 00:11:42.705 --> 00:11:45.495 Uh, at my trying to get in with sass. 00:11:45.495 --> 00:11:47.775 And she says, well, if you do this five years, he couldn't even 00:11:48.165 --> 00:11:49.935 start training until five years. 00:11:49.935 --> 00:11:53.175 And so I, I started weighing it back and forth as Commonwealth. 00:11:53.205 --> 00:11:55.725 I needed an extra year as my minimum engagement. 00:11:55.725 --> 00:12:00.195 And by the time the dust settles, I was looking at eight years to walk out with 00:12:00.195 --> 00:12:02.595 a possibility of trying for SAS and 12. 00:12:02.595 --> 00:12:04.565 If I wanted to get some sort of a trade out of it. 00:12:04.615 --> 00:12:07.365 I said, man, and especially when you're 19 years old, 00:12:07.785 --> 00:12:09.435 that's a huge part of your life. 00:12:09.465 --> 00:12:11.355 And I, I was just torn. 00:12:11.385 --> 00:12:15.495 I was absolutely dejected and I just, I made the decision. 00:12:15.495 --> 00:12:20.505 I, I just, the ADHD, whatever it is, looking that far ahead, 00:12:20.505 --> 00:12:22.275 that just seems too big. 00:12:22.425 --> 00:12:25.995 And I didn't want to sacrifice that many years of my life for something 00:12:25.995 --> 00:12:29.535 which so many people, just, just for a shot at something which so 00:12:29.535 --> 00:12:31.035 many people aren't able to achieve. 00:12:31.665 --> 00:12:32.865 I used the money I'd saved up. 00:12:32.865 --> 00:12:36.255 I traveled around Europe and I came back and ended up marrying my 00:12:36.255 --> 00:12:39.015 girlfriend and having a great family. 00:12:39.045 --> 00:12:46.545 And I've spoken with friends who have gone that route of SF Britta, special forces. 00:12:46.755 --> 00:12:50.295 And they said, Trev, you made the absolute right decision. 00:12:50.625 --> 00:12:53.955 So the recruiting officer was just pouring cold water on you. 00:12:54.225 --> 00:12:58.125 Honestly, once you're in the army, once you're in the British military, 00:12:58.515 --> 00:13:02.145 they had used it for whatever they, they might just say that, 00:13:02.145 --> 00:13:03.255 but they'll use you for anything. 00:13:04.590 --> 00:13:09.030 And my friends will look back and they'll look at my family and 00:13:09.060 --> 00:13:10.680 what I've been able to achieve. 00:13:10.680 --> 00:13:14.550 And they said, honestly, the decision you made was the one 00:13:14.550 --> 00:13:20.910 that, although I valued my time, I miss out on building that portion. 00:13:21.990 --> 00:13:28.230 So when you talk about, does the ends justify the means, or if there's, 00:13:28.920 --> 00:13:33.210 uh, a way to be able to get to what you actually wanted to do and 00:13:33.210 --> 00:13:34.680 not have to sacrifice everything? 00:13:34.680 --> 00:13:39.270 Cause some, some things like high-end, I should imagine TTF too. 00:13:40.230 --> 00:13:45.060 I got a story on that as well, but a JTF too, you don't really have an 00:13:45.060 --> 00:13:51.300 option, but to sacrifice certain things, um, w the miracle mile was that Roger 00:13:51.300 --> 00:13:53.010 Bannister, am I remembering this one? 00:13:53.010 --> 00:13:53.280 Right. 00:13:54.330 --> 00:14:00.210 So back in the day they had, uh, people said you can't run a mile and under, 00:14:00.210 --> 00:14:02.100 I think it was four minutes formula. 00:14:02.790 --> 00:14:03.090 Okay. 00:14:03.120 --> 00:14:05.670 So four minute mile is impossible benchmark. 00:14:05.670 --> 00:14:05.850 Yeah. 00:14:05.970 --> 00:14:06.480 Okay. 00:14:07.050 --> 00:14:11.490 Uh, all of a sudden, what was impossible became possible, and I 00:14:11.490 --> 00:14:15.060 believe it was Roger banister, and I there's a statute here in Vancouver, 00:14:15.060 --> 00:14:19.110 another guy, Lenny, Lanny, something, somebody will tell me I'm sure. 00:14:21.030 --> 00:14:25.170 But the year after Roger Bannister ran that mile, more people ran it. 00:14:26.280 --> 00:14:29.280 I think it was like five or six other people year after that, 00:14:29.280 --> 00:14:30.630 there is like 20, some odd. 00:14:31.620 --> 00:14:34.980 W everyone runs a mile in under four minutes because they have a 00:14:34.980 --> 00:14:38.490 framework and they know in their mind that that is a possibility. 00:14:38.940 --> 00:14:44.970 I'm wondering if in policing and high-level work in ERT, if there was 00:14:44.970 --> 00:14:48.510 quite often a mindset of you just go into it, knowing that there's a high 00:14:48.510 --> 00:14:51.810 divorce rate for police officers, and you have to give up everything 00:14:51.810 --> 00:14:57.990 and take a hard path in order to operate as an ear at the ERT level. 00:14:58.860 --> 00:15:03.270 Is, has that been the mindset in the past and is that changing 00:15:04.950 --> 00:15:05.340 well? 00:15:05.520 --> 00:15:08.100 Um, I think you're absolutely right. 00:15:08.100 --> 00:15:10.290 I mean, humans, we put ourselves in boxes. 00:15:10.290 --> 00:15:13.620 We're really good at that because it offers us a certain amount of 00:15:13.620 --> 00:15:16.440 control or the appearance of control. 00:15:17.100 --> 00:15:18.750 Um, and, and we don't like to be. 00:15:19.515 --> 00:15:24.165 We don't like to be out of control and really we're flying in a universe on 00:15:24.165 --> 00:15:26.354 a, on a ball of water, out of control. 00:15:26.474 --> 00:15:30.314 We are, we are essentially, nobody knows what's going on here, you know? 00:15:30.704 --> 00:15:34.334 Um, but I, I tend to agree with you. 00:15:34.334 --> 00:15:38.744 And I think that the purpose of the book and the purpose of Sean 00:15:38.744 --> 00:15:43.064 and I working together is to bring precisely that some of the, some of 00:15:43.064 --> 00:15:47.084 those, you know, answers to some of those, I don't know about answers. 00:15:47.155 --> 00:15:51.165 Let's call them reflection points where somebody will read that. 00:15:51.285 --> 00:15:56.594 And it's, it made a make a whole bunch of sense at the time, but it will when 00:15:56.594 --> 00:15:58.364 they are faced with that situation. 00:15:58.364 --> 00:16:01.964 And when they start self-assessing what, how they are reacting to a 00:16:01.964 --> 00:16:08.805 certain, you know, part of their, um, professional endeavors, you know, like, 00:16:08.814 --> 00:16:10.755 okay, I'm, I'm seeing a pattern here. 00:16:10.755 --> 00:16:12.765 That's already been pre-identified. 00:16:13.125 --> 00:16:19.425 And I've been told that this, you know, ABC and D, so that was the 00:16:19.425 --> 00:16:24.375 point is to offer the outside the box perspective so that you can still 00:16:24.375 --> 00:16:26.625 pursue what it is that you were after. 00:16:26.775 --> 00:16:31.305 And you can get after it, like nobody's business and go to the top of the 00:16:31.305 --> 00:16:36.165 heap or do whatever you want, but know that, you know, those are some 00:16:36.165 --> 00:16:39.765 of the mitigating strategies that you may employ at various stages. 00:16:40.574 --> 00:16:46.275 Can you still have a successful relationship with a significant other. 00:16:47.115 --> 00:16:49.575 And pursue these high level careers. 00:16:50.055 --> 00:16:51.945 Yes, yes, yes. 00:16:52.125 --> 00:16:55.575 Does that mean that the significant other is going to have to just accept 00:16:55.575 --> 00:17:00.405 the fact that they're no longer going to receive the same level 00:17:00.405 --> 00:17:03.945 of attention because of something else is going to be occupying that? 00:17:03.945 --> 00:17:07.035 Or is there a way to be able to juggle both of them successfully? 00:17:07.935 --> 00:17:08.325 Well, 00:17:09.615 --> 00:17:13.815 I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that in majority of cases, 00:17:13.845 --> 00:17:20.385 the relationships that are successful, um, when people are pursuing, you 00:17:20.385 --> 00:17:25.545 know, things at the top of the heap is often the spouses are very 00:17:25.545 --> 00:17:28.665 supportive and it does happen that one. 00:17:29.805 --> 00:17:34.274 Puts their own endeavors on a bit of a back burner, you know, at 00:17:34.274 --> 00:17:36.315 times to support the other person. 00:17:36.315 --> 00:17:39.735 But that has to be a mutually agreed upon arrangement. 00:17:39.735 --> 00:17:42.705 It has to be something that the person is okay with. 00:17:42.705 --> 00:17:46.665 It has to be something that's reciprocal at one point or another. 00:17:46.665 --> 00:17:50.504 So for example, I could be looking at, you know, working the next five years 00:17:50.504 --> 00:17:55.305 to get onto a team or to get into, um, a military team or, or, or even an office 00:17:55.305 --> 00:17:58.514 job, a corporate ladder climbing the corporate ladder, whatever the case may 00:17:58.514 --> 00:18:01.605 be, but we need to be in this together. 00:18:01.935 --> 00:18:05.555 And, and this is what is anticipated and this is it. 00:18:05.565 --> 00:18:09.165 But the problem is, is at times is we want the next and the next and 00:18:09.165 --> 00:18:10.395 the next thing and the next thing. 00:18:10.395 --> 00:18:14.685 And we forget that disinter time we were being supported by somebody 00:18:15.075 --> 00:18:20.445 that may have muted their own, you know, wishes and desires with 00:18:20.445 --> 00:18:22.155 respect to the professional endeavor. 00:18:22.155 --> 00:18:27.075 And, and if there is a, if there is, um, uh, a way to have that 00:18:27.195 --> 00:18:30.975 agreed upon and the person is okay with that, that's one thing. 00:18:31.425 --> 00:18:34.545 The problem is, is when somebody is being left behind and then 00:18:34.545 --> 00:18:38.325 everything becomes about the person that's pursuing a certain goal. 00:18:38.355 --> 00:18:43.665 So there, there, there has to be give and take, and there has to be, but you need, 00:18:43.875 --> 00:18:49.480 when you enter a life of service, You need somebody that's supportive, you know, and 00:18:49.500 --> 00:18:53.700 that doesn't mean supportive blindly, like all the way through and forgetting about 00:18:53.700 --> 00:18:58.380 themselves, but then inversely, you also have the responsibility to look back and 00:18:58.380 --> 00:19:01.200 say, how much support have I been getting? 00:19:01.260 --> 00:19:06.330 And how do I, I don't like to say, pay it back so to speak, but it is. 00:19:06.330 --> 00:19:12.900 I mean, how do I, how do I, you know, how do I in term of, uh, support the person 00:19:12.900 --> 00:19:17.730 that's been supporting me for so long and whatever and whatever it is that, you 00:19:17.730 --> 00:19:19.800 know, sort of makes their heart, you know? 00:19:20.580 --> 00:19:24.510 Um, and so, yeah, I, I do believe it is possible. 00:19:24.510 --> 00:19:28.710 I do believe that at some point there has to be like dependent on 00:19:28.710 --> 00:19:30.150 the, it has to swing the other way. 00:19:30.300 --> 00:19:34.650 Otherwise we're looking at possible resentment and we're looking at a 00:19:34.650 --> 00:19:39.840 degradation of relationships, those types of things, it takes a very special person 00:19:40.020 --> 00:19:43.950 to be, to be able to say, okay, I'm going to put myself on the back burner for a 00:19:43.950 --> 00:19:45.990 bit while this person is pursuing this. 00:19:47.490 --> 00:19:49.080 Higher purpose, so to speak, but 00:19:49.620 --> 00:19:56.669 do so in the selection, selection process for ERT specifically, uh, there's going 00:19:56.669 --> 00:19:58.530 to be physical selection, obviously. 00:19:58.770 --> 00:20:01.050 Um, there'll be cognitive selection. 00:20:01.560 --> 00:20:04.949 I do they look at your personal relationships to see if you have that 00:20:04.949 --> 00:20:06.270 support network when you go home. 00:20:06.270 --> 00:20:07.709 Is that part of the selection process? 00:20:08.399 --> 00:20:09.389 No, not really. 00:20:09.389 --> 00:20:13.020 I mean, it is from a professional standpoint, but no, it, you're not 00:20:13.020 --> 00:20:17.969 getting into, you know, the person, um, personal, personal affairs, so to speak, 00:20:17.969 --> 00:20:21.870 to, to try to see if they have the, and, and ultimately where's the line, right? 00:20:21.870 --> 00:20:24.209 Like who's making that determination. 00:20:24.209 --> 00:20:28.830 So say you were to go interview somebody and you say you come up on a, you 00:20:28.830 --> 00:20:32.610 know, a fact that perhaps that person doesn't have the right support at home. 00:20:32.610 --> 00:20:33.689 Like what happens then? 00:20:33.719 --> 00:20:37.260 Like, do you enter jacked and you're in, you interfere with their careers 00:20:37.260 --> 00:20:39.090 or really, so it just wouldn't work. 00:20:39.120 --> 00:20:39.300 Right. 00:20:39.330 --> 00:20:44.280 It's but I think what needs to happen is to let the candidates and the people 00:20:44.280 --> 00:20:50.610 that are seeking those jobs so that they know, so that they're aware that those 00:20:50.610 --> 00:20:57.090 conversations need to happen and that, you know, it will be very costly and what the 00:20:57.090 --> 00:21:00.090 cost could be if, if they don't, you know? 00:21:00.330 --> 00:21:07.739 Uh, and so, yeah, I think just pre pre-loading that information into 00:21:07.739 --> 00:21:09.600 the brains of those that are seeking. 00:21:10.635 --> 00:21:14.415 To do certain things as critical and, and that's again, feeds 00:21:14.415 --> 00:21:16.005 into the purpose of the book. 00:21:16.215 --> 00:21:19.335 So I guess you'd have to be really, really careful about the way you 00:21:19.335 --> 00:21:23.025 preload that information without creating self-fulfilling biases. 00:21:23.325 --> 00:21:28.065 So if you're, for example, pre-loading information that says, you know, person 00:21:28.065 --> 00:21:31.305 can run four and a half minute mile, but a four minute mile, I don't know. 00:21:31.305 --> 00:21:31.605 Right. 00:21:31.965 --> 00:21:38.715 Or if it's sort of, and I I've heard it referenced in the past. 00:21:38.745 --> 00:21:43.095 So gunshot wounds, uh, shotgun wounds can be absolutely devastating 00:21:43.095 --> 00:21:44.835 rifle room wounds, lots of power. 00:21:45.405 --> 00:21:48.645 But if you're shot with a handgun, you're more likely to 00:21:48.645 --> 00:21:50.385 survive than you are to die. 00:21:50.835 --> 00:21:55.035 If you're shot, the statistics would bear that, um, mind you, they were 00:21:55.035 --> 00:21:59.805 finding people that were dying from wounds that doctors would look at and 00:21:59.805 --> 00:22:03.285 say, you know, they probably shouldn't have died from this thing, but they did. 00:22:03.315 --> 00:22:09.105 And, uh, some people have postulated that perhaps it's because people have 00:22:09.105 --> 00:22:11.445 this bang, bang, you're dead mentality. 00:22:11.475 --> 00:22:12.165 Oh, I'm shot. 00:22:12.165 --> 00:22:14.355 Next step is no, I'm, I'm dying. 00:22:14.355 --> 00:22:18.375 And you create this sort of self fulfilling prophecy or cognitive bias. 00:22:18.975 --> 00:22:24.705 Um, do you have to be very careful in how you release, these are possibilities 00:22:24.705 --> 00:22:27.345 that could happen without ingraining? 00:22:27.885 --> 00:22:30.495 Well, you know, if you're going to be tier one, you can expect 00:22:30.495 --> 00:22:31.375 to kiss your relationship. 00:22:31.875 --> 00:22:32.355 Goodbye. 00:22:32.835 --> 00:22:33.165 Yeah. 00:22:33.165 --> 00:22:34.425 Well, see. 00:22:35.430 --> 00:22:40.320 Yes, and, and that is not how it's articulated. 00:22:40.320 --> 00:22:40.590 Right. 00:22:40.620 --> 00:22:46.560 And so, and so that's, that's precisely how it's not articulated essentially. 00:22:46.920 --> 00:22:52.560 So you can be tier one, you can go to these very places and you 00:22:52.560 --> 00:22:54.780 can maintain a relationship. 00:22:55.110 --> 00:23:02.700 Those are some of the key things and traps to avoid, or to, um, see coming so that 00:23:02.700 --> 00:23:07.980 you may make the right decisions at the right time, based on the totality of your 00:23:07.980 --> 00:23:12.000 circumstances, not for you to live your life the way I lived the mine, you know? 00:23:12.690 --> 00:23:17.790 And so it's more about having people, giving people the ability to 00:23:17.790 --> 00:23:21.480 recognize the traps that are going to come along the way and give them, 00:23:22.050 --> 00:23:24.210 you know, three to four options. 00:23:24.390 --> 00:23:27.120 You don't even need to give them options, per se. 00:23:27.180 --> 00:23:31.740 All you need to do is for them to know that options are out there, you know? 00:23:31.740 --> 00:23:37.140 And so, so their brain and their mindset is now how do I, and this is how we 00:23:37.140 --> 00:23:41.880 should be, we should seek to, to, to reach excellence in everything, which includes 00:23:41.970 --> 00:23:44.400 the way we self-assess our reality. 00:23:44.760 --> 00:23:45.090 Right? 00:23:45.420 --> 00:23:47.100 And so that's also a part of it. 00:23:48.270 --> 00:23:57.270 So having the ability to minimizing biases and really look at our own 00:23:57.270 --> 00:24:03.030 self are at, at oneself, um, in a. 00:24:04.050 --> 00:24:08.280 Critical nonjudgmental way, but having the ability to say, okay, this is where 00:24:08.280 --> 00:24:09.930 I'm at, and this is where I'm going. 00:24:10.590 --> 00:24:13.320 And this is a trap that I seem to be falling into here. 00:24:13.590 --> 00:24:18.480 I know there is possibilities out of this that are not warranting me 00:24:18.480 --> 00:24:24.000 to break up my relationship or to, you know, stop the hobby that I love 00:24:24.000 --> 00:24:25.860 doing or whatever the case may be. 00:24:26.490 --> 00:24:32.790 Um, therefore I will focus on finding what this path is 00:24:32.790 --> 00:24:34.680 going to look like for myself. 00:24:36.020 --> 00:24:41.960 When you say self assess your reality, I thought that was an 00:24:41.960 --> 00:24:43.130 interesting choice of words. 00:24:44.390 --> 00:24:45.470 What do you mean by that? 00:24:47.000 --> 00:24:48.860 What do I mean by your reality? 00:24:49.430 --> 00:24:50.720 Yeah, I mean, instead 00:24:50.720 --> 00:24:52.940 of the reality, self-assess your reality? 00:24:53.450 --> 00:24:57.080 Well, everything is contextual, right? 00:24:57.110 --> 00:25:01.670 And so, and this goes in line with risk assessment, for example, like 00:25:01.670 --> 00:25:07.400 a small, tiny, tiny little variable might change, uh, completely change 00:25:07.520 --> 00:25:10.880 the course of action in dealing and resolving a situation, whether it's 00:25:10.880 --> 00:25:12.680 a tactical dilemma or anything else. 00:25:13.430 --> 00:25:18.830 And so having the ability to grab the overall concept, which. 00:25:19.995 --> 00:25:24.435 The concept of introspection, the concept of looking inwards to see the 00:25:24.435 --> 00:25:27.855 concept of not being deflecting, the blame, the concept of not staying in 00:25:27.855 --> 00:25:34.365 a box as it pertains to my own life right now in light of, you know, my 00:25:34.365 --> 00:25:40.975 relationship, my job, my, my goals, my career aspirations and all the, the, I, 00:25:41.175 --> 00:25:49.095 I would say, um, the factors that make it such a complex operation, because 00:25:49.305 --> 00:25:53.475 seven might be in front of me telling me that this is one of the options, but 00:25:53.475 --> 00:25:56.775 for me right now, at the moment that isn't based on this, that, or the other 00:25:56.775 --> 00:26:00.045 thing, so it's not, don't get me wrong. 00:26:00.075 --> 00:26:04.035 Like it's not a perfect science, but you know, what's imperfect is go 00:26:04.335 --> 00:26:06.405 generations upon generations of Canadian. 00:26:07.860 --> 00:26:13.379 Service people going through the same things, looking back, going, I wish I 00:26:13.379 --> 00:26:18.090 could go back to 20 year old me and have those conversations and just walk away and 00:26:18.090 --> 00:26:19.800 not say anything to the next generation. 00:26:19.919 --> 00:26:22.050 And the next generation does the exact same thing. 00:26:22.350 --> 00:26:25.530 So don't, you know, there is no mirror, there's no miracle pill here. 00:26:26.159 --> 00:26:28.620 Our goal is not to save everybody's marriage. 00:26:28.620 --> 00:26:29.850 And our goal is not to save. 00:26:29.850 --> 00:26:34.260 Everybody's falling, falling in some of the traps that we fell into and it 00:26:34.350 --> 00:26:38.429 inherently, it will happen anyways, because you'll be warning people and they 00:26:38.429 --> 00:26:40.139 will be in denial that this isn't them. 00:26:40.530 --> 00:26:44.280 And now they won't appropriate this information to their own reality. 00:26:44.490 --> 00:26:47.490 So they'll end up in the same trap anyway, but at the very least when 00:26:47.490 --> 00:26:51.179 they're reassessing, having falling in that trap, there'll be like I 00:26:51.179 --> 00:26:53.250 was stoled and I didn't listen. 00:26:53.429 --> 00:26:55.350 And also he reinforces the point. 00:26:56.100 --> 00:26:58.230 So our goal is not to change the world. 00:26:58.649 --> 00:27:04.980 Our goal is to provide, uh, different viewpoints of, of the same. 00:27:05.669 --> 00:27:06.870 Um, yeah. 00:27:08.220 --> 00:27:12.149 Or I don't want to call it problem, but just different viewpoints. 00:27:12.179 --> 00:27:17.460 And so that the people that are seeking, you know, excellence in whatever field 00:27:17.460 --> 00:27:22.770 of endeavor know that there is a way to do it without it impacting versus, 00:27:23.280 --> 00:27:27.629 you know, you gotta be prepared to, to just put everything aside and 00:27:27.629 --> 00:27:29.510 just focus a hundred percent in. 00:27:29.510 --> 00:27:32.760 And, and, and, and yes, there is some of that, but there is a time for that. 00:27:32.790 --> 00:27:36.389 And then there is a time for being a dad and there is a time for being a 00:27:36.389 --> 00:27:38.429 boyfriend in a, in a, in a husband. 00:27:38.429 --> 00:27:42.570 And there's a time for the family and, and the travel and the, the other things. 00:27:42.570 --> 00:27:48.899 And, you know, there's, there's, there's no, there's, there's no way 00:27:48.899 --> 00:27:54.120 to make it perfect, but you can make it perfectly imperfect, you know? 00:27:56.429 --> 00:28:01.470 So, you know, you talk about things like resiliency. 00:28:01.770 --> 00:28:03.780 I think it was Dave Grossman. 00:28:04.320 --> 00:28:08.760 He wrote the book on killing and on combat, and he's got a new book coming 00:28:08.760 --> 00:28:12.600 out, actually that he's a, I don't know if we're allowed to talk about it yet, 00:28:12.629 --> 00:28:17.490 but it said a couple of Canadian people have teamed up and are in a joint book. 00:28:17.490 --> 00:28:19.050 So I'll just put that teaser out there. 00:28:19.050 --> 00:28:20.909 And maybe we can talk about this at a later time. 00:28:21.600 --> 00:28:29.070 Um, But he talks about resiliency in the form of, uh, people, specifically 00:28:29.070 --> 00:28:33.480 people who aren't kind of subject to PTSD at a, at a later time. 00:28:34.080 --> 00:28:36.990 And Dave, Grossman's a highly kind of he's. 00:28:37.260 --> 00:28:41.310 He espouses his faith as a big backbone for that. 00:28:41.310 --> 00:28:46.410 And I, he says that the research has shown that people who have minimal 00:28:46.410 --> 00:28:50.820 to no effects from PTSD are ones that have a strong sense of faith. 00:28:50.910 --> 00:28:56.910 And I'm wondering when we, when you talk about a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu 00:28:56.910 --> 00:28:59.880 of what you're a black belt in the last podcast, he talked about it. 00:29:00.060 --> 00:29:03.600 When I, when I brought up the point and I says like, you know, are we just 00:29:03.600 --> 00:29:08.520 learning these things now about how to deal with, uh, with trauma and PTSD? 00:29:08.520 --> 00:29:11.160 And you said, when did we forget it? 00:29:11.160 --> 00:29:13.620 This has always been a part of, of what we do. 00:29:13.830 --> 00:29:21.660 W does faith play any aspect into, um, what you do for your part of 00:29:21.660 --> 00:29:25.110 your cognitive resiliencies and faith doesn't mean having to believe in some 00:29:25.290 --> 00:29:29.370 person in a cloud, it could be faith in, in whatever, but does that play a 00:29:29.370 --> 00:29:31.470 part in your cognitive resiliencies? 00:29:31.950 --> 00:29:32.610 Yeah, I believe 00:29:32.610 --> 00:29:33.030 it does. 00:29:33.030 --> 00:29:36.270 I mean, ultimately what it comes down to is purpose, right. 00:29:36.270 --> 00:29:40.860 So when you're looking at faith, for example, then there's a higher purpose, 00:29:41.100 --> 00:29:45.630 which is, and so is it directly correlated to higher purpose or is it 00:29:45.630 --> 00:29:49.800 directly correlated to the specifics of whatever faith you are following? 00:29:49.830 --> 00:29:50.100 Right. 00:29:50.640 --> 00:29:51.900 But I would say that. 00:29:52.770 --> 00:29:59.100 For my part, spirituality has always been a big part of my life, whether, 00:29:59.399 --> 00:30:06.780 um, you know, the, the, the manmade sort of religious endeavors are, are 00:30:06.780 --> 00:30:12.689 not something that I always was not only attracted to, but I, I was having 00:30:12.689 --> 00:30:14.250 a hard time with some of the concepts. 00:30:14.250 --> 00:30:14.429 Right. 00:30:15.120 --> 00:30:20.550 And, and, and the reason why I was, is because there was certain, very evident 00:30:20.550 --> 00:30:22.949 biases that were injected over time. 00:30:23.459 --> 00:30:26.639 Uh, you know, in some, in some of the, some of the religious, some of 00:30:26.639 --> 00:30:32.040 the religious endeavors, but I would say that in terms of spirituality 00:30:32.100 --> 00:30:37.889 or, or really feeling the sense of higher purpose, I definitely had that. 00:30:37.949 --> 00:30:42.090 And it wasn't higher purpose as in I'm serving a greater purpose 00:30:42.090 --> 00:30:43.500 than the person that works for me. 00:30:44.020 --> 00:30:48.570 It wasn't that, but it was taking the focus off of myself 00:30:48.600 --> 00:30:50.010 and going to the collective. 00:30:50.159 --> 00:30:50.520 Right. 00:30:50.820 --> 00:30:53.219 And that, to me, gave a strong sense of purpose. 00:30:53.219 --> 00:30:56.610 Like the collective is what I was truly focused on. 00:30:56.610 --> 00:30:58.139 What can I bring to the collective? 00:30:58.139 --> 00:31:00.540 How can I sacrifice to protect a collective? 00:31:00.840 --> 00:31:06.030 And it gave me such a strong sense of, um, of purpose and duty that 00:31:06.209 --> 00:31:10.830 you there's no question that it was easier for me to rationalize 00:31:10.949 --> 00:31:12.689 some of the emotional injuries. 00:31:13.620 --> 00:31:16.590 That I, you know, sustain as a result of my duties. 00:31:17.430 --> 00:31:21.960 And so humans are, and we've spoken about that before, but 00:31:21.960 --> 00:31:24.150 humans are 90% emotions, right? 00:31:24.360 --> 00:31:27.390 And so 10% is conscious thoughts. 00:31:27.510 --> 00:31:30.960 And the problem with that is that because it's conscious thoughts, 00:31:30.960 --> 00:31:32.520 we think it's the other way around. 00:31:33.330 --> 00:31:37.620 And so at the end of the day, it becomes about controlling our 00:31:37.620 --> 00:31:42.120 emotions, not so much, you know, what our thought processes are. 00:31:42.420 --> 00:31:48.630 And so for me, um, I was compassionate. 00:31:48.690 --> 00:31:53.790 I was invested, I was all those things, but you know, not 00:31:54.690 --> 00:31:59.190 over-invested and not over-invested in things that I can't change. 00:31:59.610 --> 00:32:04.950 And I would invest my time, energy and emotions in things that I truly 00:32:04.950 --> 00:32:08.700 had influence over, you know, things that are directly in my sphere 00:32:08.700 --> 00:32:11.550 of influence things that I have a little bit of influence over. 00:32:11.550 --> 00:32:15.450 I would, I would invest a little less emotions thing that are 00:32:15.600 --> 00:32:17.130 completely out of my control. 00:32:17.190 --> 00:32:23.070 I gave no time to, because you know, you start, you start spreading yourself 00:32:23.070 --> 00:32:24.780 really, really thin, really quickly. 00:32:25.980 --> 00:32:30.270 And so I wouldn't say it's a it's, it's not certainly not a singular approach 00:32:30.300 --> 00:32:33.630 to, you know, building resiliency, right. 00:32:33.660 --> 00:32:35.400 It's a multi-pronged approach. 00:32:36.885 --> 00:32:40.695 So, and that, that was something that I was thinking about before as well. 00:32:40.725 --> 00:32:47.025 When you say spreading thin, you give a lot, I mean, people who look on your 00:32:47.025 --> 00:32:52.335 social media feed, you, there's a lot of positivity that you convey to others. 00:32:52.845 --> 00:32:57.525 Obviously we can't be 100% positive, 100% of the time we need those 00:32:57.525 --> 00:33:00.915 ebbs and flows in order for us to appreciate when it's good. 00:33:01.125 --> 00:33:03.135 If we never knew what it was like when it was bad. 00:33:03.765 --> 00:33:08.925 But with that, you're probably going to find that there are people who will 00:33:08.925 --> 00:33:11.385 cling on to you for that positivity. 00:33:12.765 --> 00:33:16.155 Do you find that to be draining? 00:33:16.185 --> 00:33:20.745 Like there's only so much Seb to give, to give around how do you, 00:33:20.805 --> 00:33:25.065 how do you draw those boundaries for your own mental health? 00:33:26.385 --> 00:33:29.925 Well, one of the things that I, that I, that I did that really helped me 00:33:29.925 --> 00:33:35.625 was to retire because one of the issues was I had my social media presence, 00:33:35.655 --> 00:33:39.675 which isn't substantial by any stretch, but it was substantial enough and I 00:33:39.675 --> 00:33:41.175 was having enough engagement that. 00:33:42.030 --> 00:33:47.670 Often receive messages and emails and calls and have people wanting to 00:33:47.670 --> 00:33:50.340 discuss certain things a little bit more and people that needed help. 00:33:50.640 --> 00:33:52.740 And I always did it always. 00:33:52.740 --> 00:33:54.510 It didn't really matter who you were. 00:33:54.540 --> 00:33:58.500 I always responded and oftentimes I'd be responding with, you know, some 00:33:58.500 --> 00:34:02.700 sort of novel, you know, that I written because those, the questions were 00:34:02.700 --> 00:34:04.740 simple, but the answers were complex. 00:34:05.190 --> 00:34:08.100 So I would have to launch into those, those things. 00:34:08.130 --> 00:34:13.230 And I really enjoyed doing that, but managing my own career and 00:34:13.230 --> 00:34:16.350 my family life and everything at the same time was very difficult. 00:34:16.350 --> 00:34:21.600 So when I decided to retire, I made this, which was a passion for me, 00:34:21.659 --> 00:34:24.389 a part of what I was now doing. 00:34:25.020 --> 00:34:28.830 And so I started, you know, performance coaching and I started doing those things. 00:34:28.830 --> 00:34:34.080 And so now, and it's, it's been a big transition because I never 00:34:34.080 --> 00:34:38.850 liked to charge people for certain things and helping people was 00:34:38.850 --> 00:34:40.590 always something I'd done for free. 00:34:41.250 --> 00:34:46.080 But now I was running into the scenario where it was becoming overwhelming for me. 00:34:46.440 --> 00:34:46.800 Right. 00:34:46.860 --> 00:34:47.490 And so. 00:34:49.260 --> 00:34:55.020 With my social media, as it stands, what I tend to do is I tend to, and 00:34:55.020 --> 00:34:58.620 there's so much content out there now with like all the podcasts I've been 00:34:58.620 --> 00:35:02.520 on and some of the documentaries, those types of things, what I've started 00:35:02.520 --> 00:35:07.080 doing with people is because humans will take the path of least resistance. 00:35:07.770 --> 00:35:10.950 They know I have 30 podcasts out and it will ask me, what should 00:35:10.950 --> 00:35:12.750 I do to, you know, become this? 00:35:12.750 --> 00:35:15.690 Or what should I do if I want to go into policing or whatever, I'm like, listen, 00:35:15.780 --> 00:35:21.840 I got lots of content out there once you are done reviewing and listening to some 00:35:21.840 --> 00:35:23.700 of those, which is a time investment. 00:35:24.150 --> 00:35:26.430 And you're not going to get the instant gratification of getting an 00:35:26.430 --> 00:35:30.270 answer today, but you will get the gratification of knowing you've done 00:35:30.270 --> 00:35:32.130 the work and you've researched it. 00:35:32.430 --> 00:35:35.370 And now you have the answers that you are looking for. 00:35:35.370 --> 00:35:38.400 And if there's anything left outstanding, come back to me and 00:35:38.400 --> 00:35:39.390 we'll have that conversation. 00:35:40.050 --> 00:35:45.180 That's kind of what I had to do to draw the line because I was getting inundated 00:35:45.240 --> 00:35:49.380 with, with this, the same questions over and over again, the quick fix. 00:35:49.380 --> 00:35:50.160 Yeah, for sure. 00:35:50.670 --> 00:35:54.960 And you know, this is not something that's. 00:35:56.670 --> 00:36:00.540 This is not something that's, um, that only people that are 00:36:00.540 --> 00:36:03.930 wanting to go somewhere doing this is what most people do. 00:36:04.320 --> 00:36:08.580 So if I was a team leader, when I was a team leader in a team and the 00:36:08.580 --> 00:36:13.290 guys had access to me because my were cubicles, you know, we're open. 00:36:13.290 --> 00:36:15.540 And that, and it was like an open floor format. 00:36:15.750 --> 00:36:19.230 And every time they walked by, they could ask me a question with respect to 00:36:19.230 --> 00:36:23.490 something that they definitely, their peers would have known about that I 00:36:23.490 --> 00:36:27.840 definitely didn't need to be, um, you know, tapped on the shoulder for that. 00:36:27.870 --> 00:36:30.620 So what I used to tell the guys is like, look, you're, 00:36:31.080 --> 00:36:32.700 first of all, ask your peers. 00:36:33.029 --> 00:36:35.580 If you don't get the answer, ask your supervisor. 00:36:35.580 --> 00:36:37.500 And if you still don't have it come to me. 00:36:38.040 --> 00:36:38.340 Right. 00:36:38.370 --> 00:36:42.000 And, and if there is something that really, it needs to be addressed 00:36:42.000 --> 00:36:43.740 right now, evidently come to me. 00:36:44.400 --> 00:36:49.230 But if there is a way for you to work out the information without, so that I can 00:36:49.230 --> 00:36:53.340 focus on my administrative task and make sure that the team is as is running the 00:36:53.340 --> 00:36:57.750 way it should, um, I'm gonna, I'm gonna need some help here at boys, you know? 00:36:57.750 --> 00:37:01.770 So it re yeah, so it's, it's, so it's no different and humans, 00:37:01.770 --> 00:37:04.350 humans are lazy by nature, right? 00:37:04.950 --> 00:37:05.190 Yep. 00:37:05.440 --> 00:37:08.370 And we just want, we just want the quick fix. 00:37:08.370 --> 00:37:08.670 So 00:37:09.480 --> 00:37:12.570 see, that's something that I've struggled with because I 00:37:12.960 --> 00:37:15.029 can to like, to help people. 00:37:15.300 --> 00:37:18.420 And when people ask for help, I will almost always say. 00:37:19.140 --> 00:37:20.310 Yes, not a problem. 00:37:20.340 --> 00:37:21.090 How can I help? 00:37:21.570 --> 00:37:25.200 I will drop everything that I'm doing so it can help somebody else. 00:37:25.200 --> 00:37:29.340 Because in my mind, if somebody is taking that step to reach out 00:37:29.340 --> 00:37:33.390 and ask for help, well, it must be something pretty substantial, right? 00:37:33.390 --> 00:37:35.340 Because I don't know about you. 00:37:36.150 --> 00:37:37.020 All I do know about you. 00:37:37.080 --> 00:37:39.450 You're not the type of person to go out and putting your hand out 00:37:39.450 --> 00:37:40.800 and asking for people for help. 00:37:40.950 --> 00:37:43.080 I'm not the type of person to ask people for help. 00:37:43.140 --> 00:37:47.190 If someone's asking me for help, I naturally kind of think that they 00:37:47.190 --> 00:37:51.180 must be kind of like me and they must need some something quite quickly. 00:37:51.180 --> 00:37:57.840 And I, a good friend of mine says, Travis, the problem with people with good 00:37:57.840 --> 00:38:02.160 enhances is those with ill intentions will use those good intentions against them. 00:38:02.640 --> 00:38:05.280 And I don't know if people will do that. 00:38:05.280 --> 00:38:06.000 Some people will do that. 00:38:06.000 --> 00:38:06.540 Intentionally. 00:38:07.500 --> 00:38:09.810 Most people don't even realize that they're doing it. 00:38:10.320 --> 00:38:16.110 And being able to draw that line and say, listen to the podcast, listen to 00:38:16.110 --> 00:38:19.170 the, the work that I've put out, take a look, read some of the stuff I had 00:38:20.040 --> 00:38:24.600 that I think that's a brilliant way to be able to ensure that if someone's 00:38:24.600 --> 00:38:28.830 coming to you for help, that they are putting in the work themselves. 00:38:29.820 --> 00:38:35.910 Um, if somebody's listened to all the podcasts, read your literature, read 00:38:35.910 --> 00:38:39.360 your, do you feel they would know, you 00:38:40.980 --> 00:38:43.020 know, Not really. 00:38:43.110 --> 00:38:50.610 I do think that, um, there is a, there is there still, there still are a lot 00:38:50.610 --> 00:38:56.280 of misconceptions with respect to not only me, but people like me, you know, 00:38:56.700 --> 00:38:58.200 and it's, and it's very interesting. 00:38:58.200 --> 00:39:01.170 So I'll, I'll give you a, I'll give you an example. 00:39:01.230 --> 00:39:04.950 Um, let's, let's talk about Jocko willing, for example. 00:39:04.980 --> 00:39:05.280 Right. 00:39:05.280 --> 00:39:09.780 And I, and I obviously respect hold a ton of time for him and everything 00:39:09.780 --> 00:39:13.320 he's trailblazed and everything he's accomplished and amazing leader, 00:39:14.370 --> 00:39:19.860 but Jocko who was a Navy seal commander is often seen as this. 00:39:20.520 --> 00:39:24.180 And to a certain extent he's responsible for that, but he's 00:39:24.180 --> 00:39:26.940 often seen as a bad-ass, right? 00:39:27.000 --> 00:39:32.130 Like he, he's a bad-ass that gets up at four 30 in the morning, eats ammo. 00:39:32.370 --> 00:39:38.250 And, uh, and, and, you know, and, and, and so, and so when the younger generations or 00:39:38.250 --> 00:39:44.910 the people that are aspiring to be in a, in a shoes that Jocko was in, for example, 00:39:45.210 --> 00:39:51.180 they miss that when he speaks about his guys, he tears up when he, when he does 00:39:51.180 --> 00:39:57.960 certain things like, and so what we have here is actually, um, Uh, an incredibly 00:39:57.960 --> 00:40:02.910 caring human that cared about his people more than he cared about anything else. 00:40:03.540 --> 00:40:05.340 And you see that very evidently. 00:40:05.340 --> 00:40:09.450 So what you're now missing is you're seeing, you know, him working out hard, 00:40:09.450 --> 00:40:13.080 him being a black belt in jujitsu, him doing this, him doing that. 00:40:13.080 --> 00:40:16.710 But the reality of what made him such a great leader is the amount 00:40:16.710 --> 00:40:18.090 of care he put in these people. 00:40:19.650 --> 00:40:27.960 And so if you were to miss that part, you are now sort of, you are crafting yourself 00:40:27.990 --> 00:40:32.460 into this bad-ass that doesn't have the balance of the other side of this. 00:40:32.880 --> 00:40:38.640 And there's real issues with this there's real issues with being a 00:40:38.640 --> 00:40:43.620 self-discipline hard-ass that doesn't have the compassionate side that doesn't 00:40:43.620 --> 00:40:49.380 have, um, you know, the caring side that doesn't have that self-awareness, 00:40:49.380 --> 00:40:51.390 that self-regulation, that doesn't have. 00:40:51.690 --> 00:40:57.720 And so, and, and Joel core course, isn't going to go out and say, I'm an 00:40:57.720 --> 00:41:02.670 emotional person, or I'm a person, or I'm a person that, you know, loved, you 00:41:02.670 --> 00:41:07.920 know, Markley or whoever, you know, past, um, obviously as a result of war under 00:41:07.920 --> 00:41:12.630 his command about man, like, if you are paying attention, you are seeing that. 00:41:12.750 --> 00:41:13.780 And if, and, but that's. 00:41:14.565 --> 00:41:16.095 With some steps back. 00:41:16.095 --> 00:41:16.365 Right. 00:41:16.395 --> 00:41:20.985 But if you're, if you're, if you're singularly focused on a certain goal 00:41:21.015 --> 00:41:25.365 and you're looking at David Goggins and you're looking at the Jocko Willink, and 00:41:25.365 --> 00:41:31.545 you're wanting to be one of them badasses, you often will miss the other side of 00:41:31.545 --> 00:41:36.675 that, which is, you know, the rest of the stuff that, that I just spoke about. 00:41:36.675 --> 00:41:43.725 So for me, I I'll often, and, and again, I have, you know, tattoos on my hands. 00:41:43.725 --> 00:41:45.465 I have this Mohawk, I have this. 00:41:45.705 --> 00:41:48.465 And so a part of that itself is self. 00:41:49.005 --> 00:41:51.645 Um, and not self-imposed. 00:41:51.645 --> 00:41:58.305 But part of that is, is, is, is me creating a certain image with myself, 00:41:58.335 --> 00:42:01.575 you know, not that that image, isn't a reflection of who I am, but 00:42:01.575 --> 00:42:04.095 that image is a part of who I am. 00:42:04.095 --> 00:42:05.205 It's not who I am. 00:42:05.755 --> 00:42:10.215 Unfortunately, you only seeing what the eye, what the eye can see, and 00:42:10.215 --> 00:42:17.445 you hear a very narrow, um, sort of, it's a very narrow view on the 00:42:17.445 --> 00:42:21.555 inside, on the inner workings of, of someone, even if you have 30 podcasts. 00:42:21.555 --> 00:42:25.395 And as you mentioned before, and I actually, I, you know, I couldn't agree 00:42:25.395 --> 00:42:30.435 more with you is that people tend to ask the same questions and we, we, we 00:42:30.435 --> 00:42:34.785 tend to go to same tangents and we, we tend to stay in the realm of where 00:42:34.785 --> 00:42:39.585 I was an SME, you know, and that's generally policing, tactical operation 00:42:39.585 --> 00:42:40.905 training, those types of things. 00:42:41.025 --> 00:42:42.285 So it proliferates the. 00:42:42.990 --> 00:42:43.799 The stigma. 00:42:43.919 --> 00:42:44.399 Right? 00:42:44.450 --> 00:42:44.750 Right. 00:42:46.020 --> 00:42:50.580 So my high school grad quote, one of them, cause I have two different 00:42:50.580 --> 00:42:52.230 quotes at two different high schools. 00:42:52.230 --> 00:42:55.230 I think in another podcast that's out there. 00:42:55.350 --> 00:42:57.240 People will know, I think was five high schools. 00:42:57.240 --> 00:43:01.649 I went to got into a little bit of trouble, but, um, one of my high 00:43:01.649 --> 00:43:07.259 school grad quotes was by and it was out of suffering have emerged 00:43:07.290 --> 00:43:11.339 the strongest souls, the most massive characters are seared with scars. 00:43:12.810 --> 00:43:19.770 Now for you, there's scars both physically and non-physical. 00:43:20.129 --> 00:43:25.200 And I figured in one area that's easy for us to talk about the easy things that we 00:43:25.200 --> 00:43:27.660 can go through areas where you're in SME. 00:43:27.660 --> 00:43:28.980 And we can talk about that. 00:43:29.640 --> 00:43:31.950 And maybe we can talk about the other one as well. 00:43:32.040 --> 00:43:37.180 And it's something that I think a lot of people listening would get value out of. 00:43:37.200 --> 00:43:40.319 But let's start with the easy one you came in here. 00:43:40.410 --> 00:43:42.120 I was surprised you're walking in. 00:43:42.149 --> 00:43:44.549 I offered to give you a ride in here because I didn't know 00:43:44.549 --> 00:43:45.870 what your mobility was like. 00:43:46.230 --> 00:43:48.149 You've suffered a pretty substantial. 00:43:48.900 --> 00:43:49.470 Injury. 00:43:49.589 --> 00:43:50.850 And did you want to talk about that? 00:43:51.089 --> 00:43:51.509 Sure. 00:43:51.810 --> 00:43:52.140 Yup. 00:43:52.770 --> 00:44:00.690 So on August 25th, 2021, so this year, um, I was having a minor surgery 00:44:00.690 --> 00:44:05.549 done on the left calf compartment and I was in Toronto, Canada. 00:44:06.120 --> 00:44:12.390 And, um, that night I started experiencing, um, what we now know to 00:44:12.390 --> 00:44:17.069 be compression syndrome and, uh, sorry, compartment compartment syndrome. 00:44:17.279 --> 00:44:17.670 Yes. 00:44:17.700 --> 00:44:18.540 I stand corrected. 00:44:19.080 --> 00:44:19.770 I should know. 00:44:21.150 --> 00:44:24.750 Oh, you've got, this goes to show. 00:44:25.799 --> 00:44:31.470 Um, and, and so, you know, I fell a bit of a victim of my ability to 00:44:31.470 --> 00:44:37.589 withstand pain because I associated the pain that I was feeling to the 00:44:37.589 --> 00:44:39.690 surgery that I had earlier that day. 00:44:40.440 --> 00:44:43.470 But really the pain I was experiencing was much higher than 00:44:43.470 --> 00:44:44.640 what I should have experienced. 00:44:44.640 --> 00:44:45.839 I just didn't know. 00:44:46.110 --> 00:44:46.440 Right. 00:44:46.920 --> 00:44:54.000 So, um, I remained in compression for over 26 and I, and this is a total 00:44:54.000 --> 00:44:55.410 oversimplification of this story. 00:44:55.410 --> 00:44:57.930 Cause there is a few calls to the doctors and a few trips to the 00:44:57.960 --> 00:44:59.220 merge and doing all this stuff. 00:44:59.250 --> 00:45:03.029 But ultimately what it result the end result was I was in 00:45:03.029 --> 00:45:05.580 compression for 26 hours. 00:45:06.509 --> 00:45:11.790 And my, essentially for those that don't know, uh, compartment syndrome is, and 00:45:11.790 --> 00:45:15.630 this is a again an oversimplification, but it's basically the muscle is. 00:45:16.860 --> 00:45:21.030 Swelling to the point where it outgrows the capacity of the pocket 00:45:21.030 --> 00:45:22.470 that it's in, which is the fascia. 00:45:23.160 --> 00:45:28.050 Once it happens, it starts restricting blood flow by constricting the blood 00:45:28.050 --> 00:45:29.880 vessels and the nerves and everything. 00:45:29.940 --> 00:45:36.570 And if, if there is too much time spent in compression, a muscle may die from 00:45:37.020 --> 00:45:39.180 essentially oxygen starvation, right? 00:45:39.180 --> 00:45:41.670 So muscle and nerves can can die. 00:45:41.730 --> 00:45:44.730 At which point they become useless to you and they need, they need to 00:45:44.730 --> 00:45:50.610 be removed before they send your body into a tailspin of, of toxic shock. 00:45:51.840 --> 00:46:00.780 So after 26 hours in compression, between August 26th to October 1st, I had nine 00:46:00.780 --> 00:46:05.730 surgeries to, they called them the bride men, where they remove necrotic 00:46:05.760 --> 00:46:12.180 tissue tissues from my left leg, uh, essentially the totality of my left calf. 00:46:12.390 --> 00:46:16.020 Not that I had any substantial calf before that 00:46:18.580 --> 00:46:19.290 joke about it. 00:46:19.590 --> 00:46:19.950 Totally. 00:46:20.400 --> 00:46:24.420 But, um, but they, you know, they took whatever I had that my friends 00:46:24.420 --> 00:46:29.190 could make fun of and removed, removed the totality of it, um, 00:46:29.750 --> 00:46:32.190 which causes its own set of issues. 00:46:32.190 --> 00:46:39.674 But anyways, when I was in Toronto, I spent 28 days bedridden, uh, You know, 00:46:39.794 --> 00:46:45.314 taking opiates and pain medication that was evidently required at the 00:46:45.314 --> 00:46:51.044 time, so that I could heal the issue that came after was I was sent home 00:46:51.044 --> 00:46:56.325 with the same opiates and my pain level was now a lot lower rate. 00:46:56.415 --> 00:47:01.725 And so managing, um, the lack of tapering as I like to call it, 00:47:01.725 --> 00:47:06.254 because I essentially went cold Turkey was a, you know, a problem. 00:47:06.314 --> 00:47:14.085 Um, but so now where it stands now is the wound is closed since October 1st. 00:47:14.384 --> 00:47:17.805 And I have been able to walk and do certain things like I can do 00:47:17.814 --> 00:47:21.765 jujitsu and, you know, not to the extent that I could before, and I 00:47:21.765 --> 00:47:26.924 generally pay for it later, but I can still engage in a reasonable amount. 00:47:27.884 --> 00:47:32.415 But right now where we're at is January as the reassessing, Nate, as my 00:47:32.415 --> 00:47:34.154 tibial nerve was believed to be dead. 00:47:34.274 --> 00:47:38.865 And if the tibial nerve returns, which I believe it has returned, um, 00:47:38.895 --> 00:47:40.305 there's kind of two possibilities. 00:47:40.305 --> 00:47:45.705 It's either we're going to reconstructive surgery route, which would mean that 00:47:46.035 --> 00:47:49.515 foreseeably I'll be in surgeries for the next six, say two years. 00:47:49.785 --> 00:47:55.395 You know, I probably have another nine, if not more, to try to rebuild some 00:47:55.395 --> 00:48:00.134 functionality in that leg, which is also an unknown, cause we don't know 00:48:00.375 --> 00:48:05.115 what the end result is going to be or the tibial nerve or the nerves are not. 00:48:06.615 --> 00:48:08.115 Sufficiently back. 00:48:08.325 --> 00:48:11.865 And a determination is made that amputating that leg below 00:48:11.865 --> 00:48:13.245 the knee is the best option. 00:48:15.375 --> 00:48:16.815 I have my thoughts on that. 00:48:16.905 --> 00:48:23.115 And, um, and, and the conversation is obviously a corporate cooperative approach 00:48:23.145 --> 00:48:24.885 to problem solving this with the doctors. 00:48:24.885 --> 00:48:28.785 It's not just a one-sided affair where they say, well, we want to keep the leg. 00:48:28.815 --> 00:48:32.835 And I say, we want to, you know, let's take it off or vice versa, 00:48:33.435 --> 00:48:34.755 but it's a cooperative approach. 00:48:34.785 --> 00:48:35.925 Like what are we looking at? 00:48:35.925 --> 00:48:36.915 What is the prospect? 00:48:36.945 --> 00:48:40.665 What is, and, and, and really conduct a risk assessment to see 00:48:40.665 --> 00:48:43.965 which one of those two options is better for me when the time comes. 00:48:44.805 --> 00:48:46.275 So that's kind of where we're at right now. 00:48:46.395 --> 00:48:48.675 And, um, I would say that. 00:48:50.085 --> 00:48:55.635 The biggest downside right now is like the ancillary issues that I seem 00:48:55.635 --> 00:48:57.915 to have related to the condition. 00:48:58.335 --> 00:49:01.815 So that's the neurological, there's something called a neuropathic 00:49:01.995 --> 00:49:06.045 itch, which wants to the central nervous system is affected deeply. 00:49:06.315 --> 00:49:14.205 It may trigger, um, a hive sorta S you know, feeling as if I, I have to scratch, 00:49:14.235 --> 00:49:16.245 you know, scratch myself all the time. 00:49:16.245 --> 00:49:18.585 Cause I'm itchy and it gives me shivers. 00:49:18.585 --> 00:49:19.905 I'm constantly cold. 00:49:19.905 --> 00:49:23.325 And at night I will have night sweats, you know, and I've had 00:49:23.325 --> 00:49:28.335 night sweats for God, like three and a half months or so every night. 00:49:28.335 --> 00:49:31.035 And we are talking about, you know, multiple changes of 00:49:31.035 --> 00:49:33.285 clothes and from the neuropathy. 00:49:33.375 --> 00:49:33.855 Yeah. 00:49:33.915 --> 00:49:35.805 So we don't know exactly where it's coming from. 00:49:35.805 --> 00:49:37.905 The, the blood levels are all good. 00:49:37.905 --> 00:49:41.115 Everything's kind of good to go, but somehow I still have 00:49:41.115 --> 00:49:42.375 all these ancillary issues. 00:49:42.375 --> 00:49:46.845 So, um, yeah, so that's been a challenge, but it is what it is. 00:49:47.535 --> 00:49:48.225 So 00:49:48.825 --> 00:49:52.245 obviously the physical side, there's lots of pain that's associated with that. 00:49:52.785 --> 00:49:57.915 Uh, there is the interesting side note about the medication and the opiods that 00:49:57.915 --> 00:50:02.745 they, they, they put you on and you said, you just decided that's it cold Turkey. 00:50:02.745 --> 00:50:03.035 I'm off. 00:50:03.810 --> 00:50:04.800 Well, what was that like? 00:50:05.190 --> 00:50:05.580 Yeah, 00:50:05.640 --> 00:50:08.250 it was stupid is that's what it was like. 00:50:09.330 --> 00:50:14.310 So, and when I say it was, I'm not deflecting this to anybody else, like I 00:50:14.310 --> 00:50:21.270 was stupid to do with the way I did it and whether or not help was available for me, 00:50:21.330 --> 00:50:24.210 I really try to reach out and add to time. 00:50:25.140 --> 00:50:28.440 I will say this in the United States and in Canada, there was 00:50:28.440 --> 00:50:34.620 really nobody responsible for the transition, from a certain, um, 00:50:34.710 --> 00:50:40.710 level of taking pain medication to, to address, uh, to address pain. 00:50:40.800 --> 00:50:42.630 And then through D okay. 00:50:42.630 --> 00:50:47.070 To pain is now, you know, six levels lower. 00:50:47.670 --> 00:50:48.990 And how do we take her off? 00:50:48.990 --> 00:50:51.480 And there is a science behind that tapering off. 00:50:51.509 --> 00:50:57.870 It's not just the logical linear approach, you know, like, oh, well, when I felt, say 00:50:57.870 --> 00:51:02.550 on a scale from one to 10, with 10 being the most pain you could feel, if you said, 00:51:02.550 --> 00:51:08.520 well, I'm a four and now I'm an, or I was a four and I took this much medication. 00:51:09.029 --> 00:51:11.310 Now I'm a nine, I'm taking this much medication. 00:51:11.430 --> 00:51:15.330 Therefore, if I go back to four, I should go back to exactly what I was taking, 00:51:15.450 --> 00:51:16.980 because it doesn't work like that. 00:51:17.040 --> 00:51:17.820 No, you got a hammer. 00:51:17.870 --> 00:51:19.770 It doesn't exactly. 00:51:20.160 --> 00:51:23.370 So, you know, and so what we have found is that. 00:51:24.330 --> 00:51:28.589 Uh, there is a problem beyond the pandemic with respect to opiates 00:51:28.650 --> 00:51:34.259 and, um, overdosing in the states and here in Canada, it very, very serious 00:51:34.259 --> 00:51:39.180 problem, which also, you know, by virtue of me doing all the research to try 00:51:39.180 --> 00:51:42.480 to, to fix what I knew was fixable. 00:51:42.660 --> 00:51:46.230 I also stumbled upon the fact that, Hey man, like a lot of people that 00:51:46.230 --> 00:51:51.390 are on east Hastings or on the streets today, a lot of them have 00:51:51.390 --> 00:51:56.430 been prescribed legally prescribed opiates to begin with as a result of 00:51:56.430 --> 00:51:58.080 a surgery or an injury or whatever. 00:51:58.080 --> 00:51:59.700 So it's a terrifying prospect. 00:52:00.750 --> 00:52:11.100 And, um, yeah, and so for me, it, it took time and it took a lot of pushing 00:52:11.130 --> 00:52:16.620 the medical professionals along the way to help me get off the opiates. 00:52:16.620 --> 00:52:20.940 And I do not have, uh, an addictive personality at all. 00:52:20.940 --> 00:52:22.560 And I was, are you sure? 00:52:22.589 --> 00:52:23.069 Yes. 00:52:23.160 --> 00:52:28.259 Somebody who even exercise even pursuit of excellence, you wouldn't say that would 00:52:28.799 --> 00:52:30.630 follow into an predicted with personality. 00:52:30.660 --> 00:52:30.990 No, 00:52:30.990 --> 00:52:34.210 I, I believe here's what the difference is. 00:52:34.230 --> 00:52:34.560 Okay. 00:52:34.860 --> 00:52:36.750 I need to work out every day. 00:52:36.960 --> 00:52:42.390 Like I need to work out every day if I don't, I, I don't, I don't feel right. 00:52:42.420 --> 00:52:47.400 Or I don't feel right about myself or it messes up my day or it, and if I don't 00:52:47.400 --> 00:52:49.100 and if I skip it for whatever reason. 00:52:50.235 --> 00:52:53.595 I'm disappointed in myself or I have to make it up or whatever. 00:52:53.625 --> 00:52:58.095 I was never like that for me, it was about, I need to work out. 00:52:58.125 --> 00:52:59.295 It's a self sacrifice. 00:52:59.295 --> 00:53:00.135 I don't like it. 00:53:00.675 --> 00:53:01.665 I don't care for it. 00:53:02.055 --> 00:53:04.005 If I don't do it, I couldn't care less. 00:53:04.005 --> 00:53:07.365 If you gave me the same level of fitness, I'd be sitting on the couch somewhere, 00:53:07.545 --> 00:53:09.915 reading, doing other things with my time. 00:53:10.785 --> 00:53:12.015 I don't know if that makes any sense. 00:53:12.165 --> 00:53:13.965 So it was a means to an end. 00:53:14.115 --> 00:53:17.145 It wasn't, this must happen. 00:53:17.515 --> 00:53:22.185 You know, it was, it was, it, this must happen, but it must 00:53:22.185 --> 00:53:24.135 happen in order to get this done. 00:53:24.585 --> 00:53:25.185 Interesting. 00:53:25.215 --> 00:53:28.125 So it was, it was more of a professional responsibility 00:53:28.125 --> 00:53:29.175 that I had to train like that. 00:53:29.175 --> 00:53:31.335 People always say that to me, it's like, oh, you love training. 00:53:31.335 --> 00:53:34.005 No, I don't give me the same results. 00:53:34.035 --> 00:53:36.375 And, and, and let me just hang out. 00:53:36.615 --> 00:53:40.605 I will, I will use those, uh, those many hours spent in 00:53:40.605 --> 00:53:41.955 the gym to do something else. 00:53:42.045 --> 00:53:42.435 Right. 00:53:42.495 --> 00:53:48.075 And just, and, and even if I was even if, even if there was a certain degree 00:53:48.075 --> 00:53:55.455 of addiction in this, the responsibility of making sure that the people that 00:53:55.455 --> 00:54:01.065 are taking these medications in my opinion, is on the medical world, right? 00:54:01.095 --> 00:54:06.675 Like you have a responsibility as, as medical professionals to not only. 00:54:07.560 --> 00:54:11.940 Assist the people with managing their pain, but also the follow through, 00:54:12.150 --> 00:54:15.270 like how do we ensure they don't end up on the road on the street? 00:54:15.300 --> 00:54:18.150 How do we ensure that they don't end up overdosing? 00:54:18.180 --> 00:54:21.420 How do we ensure that they don't end up affecting their way of life, their 00:54:21.420 --> 00:54:26.820 families, their, you know, and so there is a responsibility and somehow, somehow 00:54:26.820 --> 00:54:31.140 for the longest time in the Canadian system, it was nobody's responsibility. 00:54:31.200 --> 00:54:32.940 So there was zero accountability. 00:54:33.630 --> 00:54:39.960 And so I was informed that very recently, uh, Vancouver general 00:54:40.170 --> 00:54:46.290 has had a transitional pain clinic created smart, but we are talking 00:54:46.290 --> 00:54:52.020 about how many years have we been handing out opiates like candies? 00:54:52.440 --> 00:54:52.890 Totally. 00:54:53.700 --> 00:54:55.830 I mean, it's been, you know, over 20 years. 00:54:56.610 --> 00:55:03.000 So, um, and the amount of people that are suffering deeply from 00:55:03.000 --> 00:55:06.930 opiate addiction is unfathomable. 00:55:07.410 --> 00:55:09.540 So there's a, uh, leave. 00:55:09.540 --> 00:55:11.370 He's a doctor, at least a professor. 00:55:11.880 --> 00:55:14.640 I believe he actually resides in north Vancouver. 00:55:14.790 --> 00:55:19.500 And at some point I, if it's something the listeners are interested in, I 00:55:19.920 --> 00:55:22.490 might just reach out to him, but I, he. 00:55:23.520 --> 00:55:26.550 Pioneered a study called rat park. 00:55:26.820 --> 00:55:30.960 And I don't know if you've heard of this one and it's come under fire. 00:55:30.960 --> 00:55:34.920 Some people have different ideas on it, but the end results of it is led 00:55:34.920 --> 00:55:39.120 to a more harm reduction and then people in the downtown east side. 00:55:39.300 --> 00:55:44.520 But the essence of it was they were doing studies on the addictiveness 00:55:44.610 --> 00:55:46.140 of different types of narcotics. 00:55:46.170 --> 00:55:51.510 And they stuck a rat into a cage with a water bottle and they lace it with cocaine 00:55:51.510 --> 00:55:53.700 or methamphetamines or with opiates. 00:55:53.700 --> 00:55:57.720 And they would find within a few days all there. 00:55:57.930 --> 00:56:00.330 And they'd given two different water bottles, one with water 00:56:00.330 --> 00:56:02.010 and one with the drug lake sweat. 00:56:02.430 --> 00:56:06.900 And they'd find that this rat more often than not would go to the drug laced one. 00:56:06.930 --> 00:56:10.500 And next thing you know, a few days later, the rats dead, cause 00:56:10.500 --> 00:56:11.580 it just couldn't get enough. 00:56:11.610 --> 00:56:16.560 And this individual with some others postulated, well, hold on a second. 00:56:17.880 --> 00:56:24.180 We give diamorphine to our grandmas when they break their hip and they 00:56:24.180 --> 00:56:27.360 come out of the hospital and they're not ending up down county side. 00:56:27.960 --> 00:56:32.700 Why is it that some people find themselves on this downward spiral will other people. 00:56:33.540 --> 00:56:38.430 Don't is it that the drug is so addictive or is it the environment in which they 00:56:38.430 --> 00:56:42.480 were raised in and that they're currently in and they introduce this drug into it. 00:56:42.480 --> 00:56:46.500 And so he said, let's make rat park and they'll give them a whole bunch of 00:56:46.500 --> 00:56:50.430 other rats to play with and other rats to meet with and wheels to turn on and 00:56:50.430 --> 00:56:52.140 all different types of toys and stuff. 00:56:52.830 --> 00:56:55.830 And he came back and said, yeah, there's some rats I would like to party. 00:56:55.859 --> 00:56:57.839 And they'd like the drugs, but only a few. 00:56:57.900 --> 00:57:01.589 And they weren't doing it to a point of killing themselves. 00:57:01.589 --> 00:57:05.009 But by and large, given their druthers, these rats would go for 00:57:05.730 --> 00:57:08.490 the water over top of the opiates. 00:57:08.490 --> 00:57:14.460 So I think when you're talking about having a proper pain clinic, 00:57:14.549 --> 00:57:17.069 holy Crow, is that ever important? 00:57:17.810 --> 00:57:23.730 I'm wondering if people have to be genetically predisposed or cognitively 00:57:23.730 --> 00:57:28.950 predisposed in order to be suffering from addiction from these opiates, or if it's 00:57:28.950 --> 00:57:33.299 just the opiates or the drugs, whatever it might be in and of themselves, it's 00:57:33.299 --> 00:57:36.270 enough to, uh, uh, to cause that hook. 00:57:36.990 --> 00:57:37.440 I don't know. 00:57:38.220 --> 00:57:38.640 Um, 00:57:39.000 --> 00:57:43.740 I mean, I don't know, but then we have to look at is, is the things that we do 00:57:43.740 --> 00:57:45.509 know if we're not providing anything. 00:57:46.635 --> 00:57:50.625 We're now we're anomic they essentially making a stance that you're, if you're 00:57:50.625 --> 00:57:53.295 addicted, as you were meant to be addicted, and if you're not addicted, 00:57:53.295 --> 00:57:58.335 you're just not, you know, whereas we have, there is we're providing the 00:57:58.335 --> 00:58:03.045 information, what people do with the information, because ultimately doctor 00:58:03.045 --> 00:58:05.865 isn't going to come to your house and make sure you've taken one instead 00:58:05.865 --> 00:58:10.365 of two or that you've you've that you followed the tapering procedures to 00:58:10.365 --> 00:58:14.775 the letter and you are, you know, so there's always a way, but what do we do? 00:58:14.775 --> 00:58:18.705 Do we throw our hands in the air and say, well, people are just predisposed 00:58:18.705 --> 00:58:20.865 to, you know, being addicted to opiates. 00:58:20.895 --> 00:58:23.115 And I don't think we can take that at all. 00:58:23.115 --> 00:58:26.355 Like it's it's and, and we do that quite a bit. 00:58:26.445 --> 00:58:29.595 We do, I, as humans, I feel like we're doing that quite a bit. 00:58:29.655 --> 00:58:35.835 I feel like this ties right into another thing that we see a lot of is let's not 00:58:35.835 --> 00:58:39.795 explain to people why we do certain things and I'm referring to in the policing 00:58:39.795 --> 00:58:44.715 context, for example, they can be taken out of policing, but let's have people 00:58:44.715 --> 00:58:50.775 have a really strong opinion on something and we will not go and ahead of the bar 00:58:50.775 --> 00:58:56.595 in front of the camera and, and, and attempt at explaining or articulating 00:58:56.595 --> 00:59:01.245 why it is that we made a certain decision because they will not undertake. 00:59:02.490 --> 00:59:04.440 And that's entirely, it isn't 00:59:04.529 --> 00:59:06.000 entirely erroneous. 00:59:06.569 --> 00:59:09.660 Like people are, are way smarter than we give them credit for. 00:59:09.810 --> 00:59:14.790 Sometimes it takes a, uh, you know, a little bit of time to kind of process 00:59:14.790 --> 00:59:18.779 the information and perhaps it has to be delivered properly and the person has to 00:59:18.779 --> 00:59:24.700 be genuinely credible and have all this information, um, to offer and, and, and, 00:59:24.740 --> 00:59:26.940 and, and answers to some of the rebuttals. 00:59:27.810 --> 00:59:28.859 But we do that all the time. 00:59:29.549 --> 00:59:31.740 You know, we, we, we paint people in boxes. 00:59:31.740 --> 00:59:34.470 You're either addicted or you're not, it's not that simple, 00:59:36.120 --> 00:59:39.299 you know, when you, and I'm looking, I mean, Siri's getting 00:59:39.299 --> 00:59:40.799 a new police force out here. 00:59:40.859 --> 00:59:43.500 I think it's a w what are your thoughts on that? 00:59:44.009 --> 00:59:50.339 Having spent so much time with Vrse and number two, and we don't have to get it. 00:59:50.430 --> 00:59:50.609 Yeah. 00:59:50.759 --> 00:59:53.850 It hit the front vehicle and the tail vehicle, then I'm stuck in 00:59:53.850 --> 00:59:56.250 between trying to get off the ex. 00:59:56.910 --> 01:00:02.520 Um, no, I mean, it, you know, I, I think I've made my, my thoughts known on that. 01:00:02.609 --> 01:00:07.109 I, you know, I would say that a lot of the, a lot of the things, those 01:00:07.109 --> 01:00:10.649 are not mutually exclusive, so there is what's being done to, to create, 01:00:10.890 --> 01:00:17.049 um, the police service, which is, you know, who they hired and, and, 01:00:17.049 --> 01:00:20.910 and, and, and, and what they're trying to do with their leadership. 01:00:20.910 --> 01:00:23.640 And what they're trying to do with our model is, is a positive, like, there's 01:00:23.640 --> 01:00:25.919 nothing wrong with w w what they're doing. 01:00:27.435 --> 01:00:32.355 Absolutely nothing wrong with the way DRC and P has done business for the last, 01:00:32.385 --> 01:00:34.335 however many years that we were in Surrey. 01:00:34.335 --> 01:00:37.725 Now, the issue is, is the things that are now being offered to these 01:00:37.725 --> 01:00:42.525 guys in their new capacity are the things that the RCMP was asking for 01:00:42.525 --> 01:00:44.925 so that they made do the job properly. 01:00:45.465 --> 01:00:45.825 Right? 01:00:46.245 --> 01:00:55.845 So for me, it's sad that we AE, um, are now telling the current members of 01:00:55.845 --> 01:00:59.775 the RCMP, like, evidently you weren't good enough and you didn't do the 01:00:59.775 --> 01:01:03.405 job hard enough and you weren't there for us or whatever the case may be. 01:01:03.405 --> 01:01:08.205 When clearly there was a lot of areas that were lacking that were 01:01:08.205 --> 01:01:11.655 communicated over and over again, that weren't being resolved. 01:01:11.655 --> 01:01:14.565 And now we're setting up the new police force for success by 01:01:14.565 --> 01:01:17.235 giving them all the tools that the RCMP has been asking for for so 01:01:17.235 --> 01:01:17.535 long. 01:01:17.745 --> 01:01:18.015 Right. 01:01:18.375 --> 01:01:19.455 How's that affect morale 01:01:20.625 --> 01:01:23.535 and it's, and it's, it's a really tough one, right? 01:01:24.165 --> 01:01:25.095 It's a really tough one. 01:01:25.095 --> 01:01:29.025 I have friends on both sides of that fence, which I don't think 01:01:29.025 --> 01:01:35.355 there is a fence, but you know, I'm just, um, yeah, they're there. 01:01:35.445 --> 01:01:37.565 Like I said, they're not mutually exclusive, like both. 01:01:39.255 --> 01:01:44.785 To a certain extent or are doing the things right, but there is the, the 01:01:45.045 --> 01:01:49.995 political environment and everything as was changed or the context was changed. 01:01:49.995 --> 01:01:54.555 And now you are going to, you're going to be assessing the results or the 01:01:54.555 --> 01:01:58.935 outcome of having implemented a new police force and say, see, I told you 01:01:59.055 --> 01:02:00.555 that this was the right way to go. 01:02:01.515 --> 01:02:05.415 What would you have done is given them what the RCMP was asking for? 01:02:06.105 --> 01:02:10.725 And the reason I not to just completely go off on a tangent. 01:02:11.045 --> 01:02:14.985 I'm just wondering, the reason I brought that in was not tangental. 01:02:14.985 --> 01:02:19.785 It was because I'm wondering if it's got to do with the way that the 01:02:19.845 --> 01:02:24.495 RCMP was communicating and had they communicated things differently. 01:02:24.865 --> 01:02:28.305 There's this whole defund, the police mentality going on in the states. 01:02:28.305 --> 01:02:33.795 And the RCMP is a large target, right in Canada, they're large organization. 01:02:33.795 --> 01:02:35.205 And they've been around for a long time. 01:02:35.205 --> 01:02:38.475 And consequently, when they're in their position, they're also kind 01:02:38.475 --> 01:02:41.355 of easy for people to throw rocks out of there at the top of the pole, 01:02:41.355 --> 01:02:43.125 too, they're going to make mistakes. 01:02:43.125 --> 01:02:46.965 They're going to do things that are well, but have there been a 01:02:46.965 --> 01:02:49.005 different approach in communication? 01:02:49.425 --> 01:02:56.985 Had they treated the citizenry as if they were intelligent or more intelligent 01:02:56.985 --> 01:03:02.355 in some areas or maybe less, uh, informed in other areas and used their. 01:03:03.674 --> 01:03:05.115 To publicly inform. 01:03:05.145 --> 01:03:07.395 Do you think we'd even be in this position? 01:03:08.274 --> 01:03:10.964 Yeah, it's, it's really hard to tell, you know, cause it's really hard to 01:03:10.964 --> 01:03:13.095 quantify things that weren't right. 01:03:13.154 --> 01:03:16.365 Like how do, how do you know how it would have impacted, but I can tell 01:03:16.365 --> 01:03:21.495 you this, um, current RCMP commanding officer of the division now, Duane 01:03:21.495 --> 01:03:28.814 McDonald was, um, an and an AECOM at the time in Surrey, responsible for Surrey. 01:03:29.145 --> 01:03:36.134 And he was out with some solid arguments and some solid articulation as to 01:03:36.134 --> 01:03:37.515 why they were doing certain things. 01:03:37.515 --> 01:03:42.765 And, and even when, to the extent of explaining to the citizen, we've 01:03:42.765 --> 01:03:45.734 been asking for those things all along, just so you understand and, and 01:03:45.734 --> 01:03:47.384 providing context, doing all this stuff. 01:03:47.384 --> 01:03:52.484 And he did a fantastic job, which was very unusual for the RCMP for a, such a 01:03:52.484 --> 01:03:55.154 high ranking person to go out and do it. 01:03:55.154 --> 01:03:58.544 And then evidently he's got the charisma and he's got everything. 01:03:58.544 --> 01:03:59.535 He's an excellent leader. 01:04:00.165 --> 01:04:04.484 Um, former it guy, by the way as it hurt. 01:04:05.564 --> 01:04:12.645 But, um, but, but yeah, so I, I do believe that there was an attempt made 01:04:12.794 --> 01:04:14.535 in, in communicating those things. 01:04:14.714 --> 01:04:18.584 Um, and you know, whether or not it would have made a difference 01:04:18.584 --> 01:04:20.234 if it was at a higher level. 01:04:20.234 --> 01:04:21.044 I have no idea. 01:04:21.584 --> 01:04:25.185 You know, I'm wondering how much hands are tied here because at a 01:04:25.214 --> 01:04:29.415 political level, it was interesting was talking with the individual 01:04:29.415 --> 01:04:31.095 Nicholas Johnson and he says some. 01:04:32.475 --> 01:04:35.865 His idea on public safety. 01:04:36.404 --> 01:04:41.025 And he says, you know, public safety should start from the individual level. 01:04:41.055 --> 01:04:43.185 The individual should be able to take care of themselves and should 01:04:43.185 --> 01:04:44.475 be able to take care of their family. 01:04:44.775 --> 01:04:49.755 And from there, each individual is able to protect themselves and consequently, 01:04:49.785 --> 01:04:54.194 you achieve public safety, but he says, we've gone backwards in his opinion where 01:04:54.555 --> 01:05:00.765 public safety is now, something that's been abrogated onto some other body 01:05:00.765 --> 01:05:05.685 in this case, policing or the federal government to turn around and say, we 01:05:05.685 --> 01:05:09.495 will provide you your public safety do not take matters into your own hands. 01:05:09.495 --> 01:05:14.355 Do not train yourself in certain ways to be safe because we will come after you. 01:05:14.745 --> 01:05:23.745 Um, I'm wondering if the RCMP situation who was more or less sort of being 01:05:23.745 --> 01:05:32.174 hamstring by the current political climate of, um, not allowing individuals 01:05:32.174 --> 01:05:37.634 to defend themselves or to be, um, responsible for their own public safety. 01:05:39.315 --> 01:05:42.134 I feel like you're specifically talking about firearms here. 01:05:43.335 --> 01:05:43.725 Not 01:05:43.725 --> 01:05:47.895 specifically, not this individual was specifically talking about firearms, 01:05:47.895 --> 01:05:52.215 but you know, it can come into, let's say martial arts, you're, you're 01:05:52.335 --> 01:05:54.345 learning self-defense for yourself. 01:05:54.345 --> 01:05:58.455 You're learning a system for morality and some of the martial arts, right. 01:05:58.515 --> 01:06:02.355 Um, you're gaining a teamwork and connection and all of 01:06:02.355 --> 01:06:03.134 these different things. 01:06:03.134 --> 01:06:06.615 But if you want to go and use that yourself, you you're going 01:06:06.615 --> 01:06:11.685 to have to be very well-schooled in the legal parameters, right. 01:06:11.685 --> 01:06:12.735 That surround that. 01:06:12.735 --> 01:06:16.065 So you're not using excessive force or you're not instigating or doing 01:06:16.065 --> 01:06:20.925 things that are, uh, offside, but, uh, as well, there seems to be a 01:06:20.925 --> 01:06:27.285 general, um, a general attitude that's, uh, portrayed over and over again. 01:06:27.375 --> 01:06:27.975 Don't worry. 01:06:28.095 --> 01:06:30.345 Just, you know, call up the police. 01:06:30.345 --> 01:06:31.125 We'll take care of you. 01:06:31.155 --> 01:06:33.195 Call up don't don't take care of this yourself. 01:06:33.195 --> 01:06:36.015 The government will come in and take care of you and people seem all too willing. 01:06:36.990 --> 01:06:39.960 To sit back and say, what's the government going to do to fix this? 01:06:39.990 --> 01:06:40.350 Right? 01:06:40.440 --> 01:06:43.830 I mean, you look at an Abbotsford when the flooding happened and their local 01:06:43.830 --> 01:06:47.940 government said the pump stations were going down, the glocal government 01:06:47.940 --> 01:06:51.030 says, don't go there and we're going to send police out to keep guys away. 01:06:51.030 --> 01:06:52.230 This is a dangerous situation. 01:06:52.860 --> 01:06:58.020 And as primarily farmers and normal citizens that came out and said, no, 01:06:58.020 --> 01:07:01.350 we're going to take matters into our own hands and we're going to work. 01:07:01.350 --> 01:07:04.050 And there was so many people that showed up that the fire department 01:07:04.050 --> 01:07:05.820 said, well, you're here anyways. 01:07:05.970 --> 01:07:06.930 Let's put you to work. 01:07:07.050 --> 01:07:10.770 And their efforts abated a disaster. 01:07:11.250 --> 01:07:18.600 Um, the, well, me be all before I go too far off base there. 01:07:18.630 --> 01:07:19.800 What are your thoughts on that? 01:07:19.800 --> 01:07:22.230 What are your thoughts on people taking personal responsibility 01:07:22.230 --> 01:07:23.220 for their own safety? 01:07:23.280 --> 01:07:30.690 And I, is that at odds with where, um, the current political climate 01:07:30.690 --> 01:07:33.660 would, uh, currently stand, like people are afraid of being sued. 01:07:33.660 --> 01:07:36.780 The government wants to try and do something and say something, 01:07:36.780 --> 01:07:39.330 but not really do anything because if they really put their neck 01:07:39.330 --> 01:07:40.530 out there, they might get sued. 01:07:40.590 --> 01:07:44.970 Um, I guess that's a slight tie into what we're talking about. 01:07:45.330 --> 01:07:45.630 Yeah. 01:07:45.640 --> 01:07:45.720 I 01:07:45.720 --> 01:07:50.325 mean, The answer is yes, people are responsible for their own safety in 01:07:50.325 --> 01:07:55.694 terms of situational or an S in terms of having predicated contingencies and, 01:07:55.915 --> 01:08:00.015 and, you know, and implemented some safety mechanisms in their own lives. 01:08:00.585 --> 01:08:06.464 And I have never, in my 20 years in the RCMP heard the RCMP management or anybody 01:08:06.464 --> 01:08:08.085 say, people shouldn't be doing that. 01:08:08.595 --> 01:08:08.924 You know? 01:08:09.285 --> 01:08:19.184 And so what w w the, the problem and what makes things a little blurry is that if we 01:08:19.184 --> 01:08:23.595 tell them if from a political standpoint, if we stay, if we tell the population, 01:08:23.595 --> 01:08:26.264 okay, you, you ought to do these things. 01:08:26.805 --> 01:08:30.644 Then there is an expectations that there ought to be money for these things that 01:08:30.644 --> 01:08:30.854 there 01:08:30.854 --> 01:08:32.505 ought to be support for these things. 01:08:32.785 --> 01:08:34.755 So, so there's implication with doing that. 01:08:34.755 --> 01:08:38.805 So from a political standpoint, but it's like, do you need to be told everything? 01:08:39.495 --> 01:08:42.404 You know, like, no, I don't, I don't need to be told everything I don't need. 01:08:42.434 --> 01:08:48.285 I don't need to be, I don't need to be, um, babysit through life 01:08:48.345 --> 01:08:49.965 by the government, so to speak. 01:08:49.965 --> 01:08:50.234 Right. 01:08:50.835 --> 01:08:57.734 And so, and then with that, what comes next is the deflection, because a 01:08:57.734 --> 01:09:01.125 lot of people will not want to take responsibility for their own safety. 01:09:01.274 --> 01:09:03.075 That's somebody else's job. 01:09:03.314 --> 01:09:05.835 So that way, when they, it doesn't go according to plan, there's 01:09:05.835 --> 01:09:08.144 somebody else to blame, not me. 01:09:08.264 --> 01:09:08.654 Right. 01:09:09.194 --> 01:09:10.035 Um, and so. 01:09:12.274 --> 01:09:14.615 How do you reconcile that? 01:09:14.644 --> 01:09:14.915 Right? 01:09:14.944 --> 01:09:17.615 And first of all, what we need to stop doing is wearing 01:09:17.644 --> 01:09:19.295 rose colored glasses, right? 01:09:19.325 --> 01:09:22.835 Then we need to have the conversations and that starts, where does it start? 01:09:22.894 --> 01:09:23.975 Does it start in school? 01:09:24.005 --> 01:09:25.024 Does it start later? 01:09:25.024 --> 01:09:30.875 Does it, is, is, you know, is this, um, is there, is there a communication strategy 01:09:30.875 --> 01:09:37.175 that we can employ to, to remind people, you know, and, and everything that we 01:09:37.175 --> 01:09:43.115 do and we choose to do has potential ramifications, whether good or bad. 01:09:43.115 --> 01:09:48.005 And so, for example, if somebody was taken martial arts and that the 01:09:48.005 --> 01:09:52.085 purpose of them taking the martial arts is, is that they can defend 01:09:52.085 --> 01:09:55.835 themselves, should the need to arise. 01:09:57.125 --> 01:10:02.015 Well, then they need to know what are the limitations of that, of the 01:10:02.015 --> 01:10:05.315 ability to defend yourself in this country, for example, and what are 01:10:05.315 --> 01:10:07.175 some of the traps to fall into? 01:10:07.445 --> 01:10:09.125 Because it's, it's really easy. 01:10:09.455 --> 01:10:15.365 You know, something happens, I feel threatened and I react a certain way. 01:10:15.545 --> 01:10:18.425 The person ends up being struck with a closed fist. 01:10:18.455 --> 01:10:25.055 The person goes to the ground, I stopped dare disengage, call the police, tell them 01:10:25.055 --> 01:10:26.945 to, you know, whatever the case may be. 01:10:27.900 --> 01:10:31.050 Or I just add an extra kick in the head while they're down. 01:10:31.260 --> 01:10:31.680 Whoops. 01:10:31.830 --> 01:10:32.900 No, exactly right. 01:10:33.180 --> 01:10:35.070 So where, where is that line now? 01:10:35.130 --> 01:10:36.060 Same things. 01:10:36.090 --> 01:10:40.890 Same thing happens again, but this time the person that's now on the ground was 01:10:40.890 --> 01:10:42.840 reaching for something in their waistband. 01:10:42.870 --> 01:10:44.250 And I had it an extra kick. 01:10:45.000 --> 01:10:45.870 Was that reasonable? 01:10:46.230 --> 01:10:46.740 Absolutely. 01:10:46.740 --> 01:10:47.010 Yeah. 01:10:47.010 --> 01:10:51.830 Based on the totality of the circumstances, I think, uh, you know, a 01:10:51.850 --> 01:10:57.180 reasonable person would say, yeah, this, and there's a lot of the way there as 01:10:57.180 --> 01:11:02.430 well, because there's no professional training in those various, um, you know, 01:11:03.510 --> 01:11:06.150 there's no, there was no expectations. 01:11:06.150 --> 01:11:10.020 So for example, if a police officer or off-duty police officer responds a 01:11:10.020 --> 01:11:13.890 certain way, there is an expectation, a professional expected expectations 01:11:13.890 --> 01:11:15.510 of how this should be handled. 01:11:15.510 --> 01:11:18.840 Whereas a civilian has a little bit more leeway, right? 01:11:19.350 --> 01:11:24.090 And so they don't need to know law the law nearly as good. 01:11:24.360 --> 01:11:25.500 They need to know it. 01:11:25.770 --> 01:11:29.370 They need to know where their rights start and where they end and how 01:11:29.370 --> 01:11:30.750 to stay within those boundaries. 01:11:30.960 --> 01:11:35.040 But I guess the point I'm making is, so now if you've, if you've gone to 01:11:35.050 --> 01:11:37.860 your martial arts studio and you've started training yourself and you've 01:11:37.860 --> 01:11:41.430 done all this, but you've never looked at the legal side of things, whose 01:11:41.430 --> 01:11:44.070 fault is that don't look around. 01:11:45.434 --> 01:11:48.405 Like, you know, don't look around, there's nobody else to blame. 01:11:48.525 --> 01:11:54.885 So we, we have the internet, we have open source things and information everywhere 01:11:55.425 --> 01:12:00.045 and reliable source of information to boot, not just any information. 01:12:00.045 --> 01:12:03.675 And yes, there is information out there that's but you generally can, 01:12:03.675 --> 01:12:06.224 can, can see it really quickly. 01:12:06.345 --> 01:12:08.684 You just have to read the comments, you just have to, you know, and 01:12:08.684 --> 01:12:13.605 you'll, you'll, you'll get a sense too, as to whether or not the source 01:12:13.605 --> 01:12:15.045 of the information is reliable. 01:12:15.135 --> 01:12:15.495 Right. 01:12:16.785 --> 01:12:21.795 And so, and so if we are to take responsibility for our own wellbeing, 01:12:21.795 --> 01:12:24.315 if we were to take responsibility for our own safety, then we have 01:12:24.315 --> 01:12:29.894 to take responsibility for where are our rights, you know, stopping. 01:12:30.375 --> 01:12:30.735 So 01:12:31.155 --> 01:12:33.885 where, I guess, where I was going with this, cause I wanted 01:12:33.885 --> 01:12:34.934 to touch on the Siri thing. 01:12:34.934 --> 01:12:37.665 And I thought that was a perfect kind of segue to at least 01:12:37.665 --> 01:12:39.135 talk about that generally. 01:12:39.644 --> 01:12:43.125 And I wanted to talk with the personal responsibility part because you're talking 01:12:43.125 --> 01:12:48.105 about your leg and your you've got some options that you have to weigh right now. 01:12:48.165 --> 01:12:52.275 Uh, growing up, I had a neighbor down the block and he he'd throw 01:12:52.305 --> 01:12:53.894 pickleball tournaments every year. 01:12:53.894 --> 01:12:57.405 And there was prizes that were given away that were just crazy. 01:12:57.585 --> 01:13:00.705 I mean, Carr was one, one year PV. 01:13:00.735 --> 01:13:04.545 I mean, it was just nuts and it was this guy's license plate was a highly drug 01:13:04.545 --> 01:13:06.465 atory term for anybody from South Africa. 01:13:06.495 --> 01:13:08.535 But nobody over here knew it. 01:13:08.745 --> 01:13:15.735 Um, In previous years, this fellow was in a motorcycle accident and I 01:13:15.735 --> 01:13:19.155 forget what bridge he is going over, but he had his leg ripped off and 01:13:19.665 --> 01:13:21.855 a doctor said, your leg is useless. 01:13:21.915 --> 01:13:24.224 It won't be able to do anything with it. 01:13:24.224 --> 01:13:25.605 You're you're done you're amputated. 01:13:25.724 --> 01:13:30.344 And he said, F that, so the thing back on, I don't care if the thing rots off 01:13:30.344 --> 01:13:32.264 me or putting it back on, they did. 01:13:32.804 --> 01:13:36.855 And, and result is he's able to play pickleball and have these tournaments. 01:13:36.855 --> 01:13:37.184 Right. 01:13:37.184 --> 01:13:40.934 And he walked around with a limp, but he took personal responsibility 01:13:41.025 --> 01:13:44.834 against the wishes of what the doctors were based on his gut, feeling 01:13:45.195 --> 01:13:47.205 more than any medical profession. 01:13:47.714 --> 01:13:52.304 If it comes to a point where the doctor is looking at you and say, it's our 01:13:52.304 --> 01:13:55.934 professional opinion that we're going to have to be looking at amputation, 01:13:56.775 --> 01:13:58.214 how are you going to deal with that? 01:13:58.245 --> 01:14:00.495 Would you take a similar approach to this individual? 01:14:00.495 --> 01:14:05.264 Or like what what's, what does that thought process look like? 01:14:06.615 --> 01:14:08.504 So far has been the other way around. 01:14:09.195 --> 01:14:12.735 They are wanting me to keep it and I'm telling them, and I'm trying 01:14:12.735 --> 01:14:16.424 to convey to them that the level of functionality that they're 01:14:16.424 --> 01:14:19.665 offering, isn't going to work for me. 01:14:19.905 --> 01:14:20.174 Okay. 01:14:20.325 --> 01:14:24.764 So I'm not keeping this thing with a 40% functionality. 01:14:26.505 --> 01:14:29.385 Like, this is not conducive to my lifestyle at all. 01:14:29.385 --> 01:14:31.965 It's not conducive to me going out, doing the sprints. 01:14:31.965 --> 01:14:34.245 It's not conducive for me to be jumping. 01:14:34.455 --> 01:14:38.325 It's not conducive to me, you know, hiking and doing whatever 01:14:38.325 --> 01:14:39.885 I really enjoy doing in life. 01:14:40.635 --> 01:14:44.805 Uh, some of the things that are not necessary, but are the way I 01:14:44.805 --> 01:14:46.725 lived my life and I, and I enjoy it. 01:14:47.445 --> 01:14:56.745 Um, so what was very apparent to me is that the way they measured functionality 01:14:56.745 --> 01:15:02.535 rate and what's acceptable and what's not was a different person than me. 01:15:02.865 --> 01:15:03.225 Right. 01:15:03.675 --> 01:15:07.755 And so, you know, oh, your leg is, is, is going to look. 01:15:08.415 --> 01:15:09.405 It's going to look nice. 01:15:09.405 --> 01:15:12.015 You know, it'll be, it'll be, and eventually down the line, you may 01:15:12.015 --> 01:15:16.755 even get, um, implants or whatever to try to balance your two legs. 01:15:16.755 --> 01:15:18.765 And, you know, cause I don't have, obviously I don't have a 01:15:18.765 --> 01:15:19.995 calf muscle in the left side. 01:15:20.685 --> 01:15:22.425 So for me it was kind of the other way around. 01:15:22.425 --> 01:15:25.635 Now there's a ton of anecdotal stuff around like, you know, you can go 01:15:25.635 --> 01:15:29.775 to the Panama and get some stem cell research and you can do this and that. 01:15:29.775 --> 01:15:34.215 And if you have 150, excuse me, $150,000 and all these other things. 01:15:34.755 --> 01:15:35.025 Okay. 01:15:35.985 --> 01:15:40.425 So at the end of the day, I'm going to have to make a call and 01:15:40.425 --> 01:15:42.765 that call is going to be based on. 01:15:44.530 --> 01:15:47.709 Educated guessed and evidence-based right, because we, we don't know 01:15:47.709 --> 01:15:49.330 for sure what's going to happen. 01:15:49.330 --> 01:15:53.679 But what I do know is this, if I send myself into another two years of 01:15:53.679 --> 01:15:58.120 reconstructive surgery where opiates are going to be required, right? 01:15:58.120 --> 01:16:01.750 Because we've spoken about the, you know, the downside of opiates, but let's call 01:16:01.750 --> 01:16:06.129 a spade, a spade, don't take him and go through too much pain and you're not 01:16:06.129 --> 01:16:10.209 healing because your body is in fight or flight and it just simply will not heal. 01:16:10.209 --> 01:16:11.469 It just wants to survive. 01:16:11.709 --> 01:16:12.040 Right. 01:16:12.309 --> 01:16:14.830 So there is applications for these medications. 01:16:14.860 --> 01:16:17.679 There is applicant there, there, you know, and we can't discount 01:16:17.679 --> 01:16:21.730 that, but I'm not really interested in spending the next two to three 01:16:21.730 --> 01:16:23.379 years in reconstructive surgeries. 01:16:23.650 --> 01:16:24.759 I'm not right. 01:16:25.330 --> 01:16:31.450 And, and that's, you know, if I was 20, it's a completely different story. 01:16:32.080 --> 01:16:38.320 But right now at my age, my career, mostly behind me in terms of like the 01:16:38.320 --> 01:16:42.730 career I really was seeking, you know, is, is kind of behind me and the need 01:16:42.730 --> 01:16:46.900 for physicality to the point where I needed it as behind me as well. 01:16:47.589 --> 01:16:52.990 And so for me now it's more about when can I go to Iceland? 01:16:53.259 --> 01:16:53.589 You know? 01:16:53.589 --> 01:16:55.780 And, and, and, and you know what I mean? 01:16:56.410 --> 01:16:57.700 I know same here, right? 01:17:00.885 --> 01:17:03.255 How long do I want to be on those pain killers? 01:17:03.285 --> 01:17:05.205 How long do I want to be going through? 01:17:05.205 --> 01:17:06.014 And the surgeries? 01:17:06.014 --> 01:17:08.085 I mean, we're talking about this, you have nine surgeries. 01:17:08.095 --> 01:17:11.985 I mean, this is nothing compared to somebody that was overseas that walked 01:17:11.985 --> 01:17:13.965 over a, you know, an IED or whatever. 01:17:14.625 --> 01:17:19.965 Um, but you know, it's still substantial to have, say nine surgeries. 01:17:19.965 --> 01:17:23.535 And if you have another nine that's 18 total and they just 01:17:23.535 --> 01:17:26.295 don't happen miraculously in between there's recovery time. 01:17:26.295 --> 01:17:29.325 And then they go back and then it's, it's, it's, it's an 01:17:29.325 --> 01:17:33.105 incredible amount of investment. 01:17:33.135 --> 01:17:34.724 It's an incredible amount of pain. 01:17:34.755 --> 01:17:37.184 It's an incredible amount of pain management. 01:17:37.184 --> 01:17:41.445 It's an incredible amount of, you know, is this hardship right? 01:17:41.474 --> 01:17:47.445 And, uh, and so the alternative is say, you go down the amputation route and 01:17:47.474 --> 01:17:53.205 you are now looking at, say a 60, 70, maybe 75% functionality rate over the 01:17:53.205 --> 01:17:57.075 course of the next, say, six months, you are going to be, you know, wearing that 01:17:57.075 --> 01:18:00.915 prosthetic, doing, doing things that there is no way in hell you would have done. 01:18:01.125 --> 01:18:01.365 Right. 01:18:01.575 --> 01:18:04.545 And so now, you know, people will talk about Phantom pains and all 01:18:04.545 --> 01:18:07.605 these other things while I get that right now, right at that right now, 01:18:07.605 --> 01:18:10.695 I have like the incredible, you know, the pain that I have in there. 01:18:10.695 --> 01:18:10.965 So. 01:18:13.560 --> 01:18:17.160 The answer is no, I'm not going to, I'm not going to keep that limit 01:18:17.160 --> 01:18:21.600 all costs, you know, and quite the other way around, I'm also not in 01:18:21.600 --> 01:18:25.680 a rush to get it amputated, and I'm not making any rash decisions with 01:18:25.680 --> 01:18:29.160 respect to it, but it's going to be an evidence-based risk assessment. 01:18:29.490 --> 01:18:35.250 That's conducted to the best of my abilities with the opinion of medical 01:18:35.250 --> 01:18:36.900 professionals taking into account. 01:18:37.230 --> 01:18:38.790 And then we're going to go from there. 01:18:39.840 --> 01:18:47.340 When I look back at the outcome favorable or not, I want to go back to the 01:18:47.340 --> 01:18:53.280 decision-making process, take the emotions out of it and say, based on a totality 01:18:53.280 --> 01:18:57.390 of circumstances and based on what I knew at the time, this was the best call 01:18:57.390 --> 01:18:59.910 to make it backfired or had worked out. 01:19:00.090 --> 01:19:03.570 But you can never be blamed for making the right call, right? 01:19:03.780 --> 01:19:04.920 Is this, it is what it is. 01:19:04.920 --> 01:19:06.690 It was a reasonable call at the time. 01:19:06.690 --> 01:19:10.710 It didn't work out or it worked out, but ultimately based on the information 01:19:10.710 --> 01:19:11.910 you had, that's always the 01:19:11.910 --> 01:19:12.180 call. 01:19:12.210 --> 01:19:13.050 That's all you can do. 01:19:13.590 --> 01:19:14.310 That's all you can do. 01:19:14.310 --> 01:19:15.720 And that's exactly how I look at it. 01:19:15.900 --> 01:19:21.330 There's no, there's no, there's no overwhelming emotional attachment, 01:19:21.330 --> 01:19:27.720 you know, there's no, um, yeah, to just isn't is this interesting? 01:19:27.990 --> 01:19:29.670 It's kind of a, it's a process, right? 01:19:30.870 --> 01:19:31.110 Yeah. 01:19:31.800 --> 01:19:32.340 Interesting. 01:19:33.810 --> 01:19:34.590 Yeah, the. 01:19:36.960 --> 01:19:41.460 Lot of different ideas that we can chat about, but maybe I'll 01:19:41.460 --> 01:19:42.780 just leave those for the moment. 01:19:42.960 --> 01:19:50.760 Um, you have talked about your desire and willingness to stand 01:19:50.760 --> 01:19:55.290 up for injustice, where you see it being a very easy decision for you 01:19:56.640 --> 01:19:59.460 when you see it in others less. 01:19:59.460 --> 01:20:04.530 So when you see it in yourself, why do you think that would be? 01:20:07.550 --> 01:20:09.470 And this is going back to your last podcast. 01:20:09.590 --> 01:20:11.900 Here are your very last podcasts that you did with. 01:20:13.055 --> 01:20:15.945 And I'm going to get in trouble here, 01:20:16.215 --> 01:20:16.995 Dave Morrow. 01:20:16.995 --> 01:20:17.985 Are you talking about, I believe 01:20:17.985 --> 01:20:18.375 it was that one. 01:20:18.375 --> 01:20:18.615 Yeah. 01:20:19.695 --> 01:20:22.185 That's exactly the, and by the way, hard to kill, what's the 01:20:22.185 --> 01:20:23.325 name of the Steve SEL movie? 01:20:23.325 --> 01:20:25.695 We're trying to remember that. 01:20:25.695 --> 01:20:27.435 No, no, no, no mark for death. 01:20:27.785 --> 01:20:28.575 It was marked for that. 01:20:29.425 --> 01:20:31.605 Cause we called it hard to kill that, but that was a different one. 01:20:31.605 --> 01:20:33.465 That was with a wet surface. 01:20:33.855 --> 01:20:34.215 Yes. 01:20:34.215 --> 01:20:35.025 His former wife. 01:20:35.025 --> 01:20:35.505 That's right. 01:20:35.535 --> 01:20:36.345 Um, what, what 01:20:36.345 --> 01:20:38.265 was her name now with the worst love scene ever? 01:20:39.135 --> 01:20:40.095 Well, it's Steven Seagal. 01:20:40.095 --> 01:20:40.785 What do you expect? 01:20:42.375 --> 01:20:44.945 Yeah, mark for a death where they cause they put the tongue on his door. 01:20:45.075 --> 01:20:45.345 Sure. 01:20:45.345 --> 01:20:45.975 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:20:46.005 --> 01:20:46.245 Okay. 01:20:46.275 --> 01:20:46.905 Wicked movie. 01:20:46.995 --> 01:20:47.265 Yeah. 01:20:47.655 --> 01:20:53.565 If you were into specifics of golden, which we obviously are, um, can you 01:20:53.565 --> 01:20:55.545 rephrase or reframe that question? 01:20:55.545 --> 01:20:57.765 Cause I'm not getting, I'm not getting the, um, 01:20:57.915 --> 01:20:58.275 okay. 01:20:58.485 --> 01:21:02.895 So you made the statement that you always found it easy to stand up for injustice 01:21:03.075 --> 01:21:04.635 when you see it happening to other people. 01:21:04.665 --> 01:21:04.875 Yeah. 01:21:05.325 --> 01:21:09.555 But you CA you let, and I think I got it in my notes here, but, uh, and I 01:21:09.555 --> 01:21:14.175 don't want to misquote you, but you generally said that you find it difficult 01:21:14.205 --> 01:21:18.075 to stand up for injustice when you, when it's happening to you and you 01:21:18.075 --> 01:21:21.465 mentioned it at an early age, so maybe that was back then and not so much now. 01:21:21.555 --> 01:21:21.885 Sure. 01:21:21.915 --> 01:21:22.125 Yeah. 01:21:22.155 --> 01:21:23.205 That was contextual. 01:21:23.205 --> 01:21:26.475 And it was, and it was in my youth, in your youth. 01:21:26.745 --> 01:21:32.025 So basically, and this was specifically attribute it to my 01:21:32.025 --> 01:21:34.395 ability to, to physically do. 01:21:35.460 --> 01:21:36.660 Myself or others. 01:21:37.230 --> 01:21:38.000 So, okay. 01:21:38.000 --> 01:21:44.280 So basically I would stand up for bullying when other people were being bullied and 01:21:44.280 --> 01:21:50.130 B be prepared to sustain physical harm in interfering with the bullying process. 01:21:50.550 --> 01:21:55.170 But when it happened to me, I just didn't have it in me to fight it. 01:21:55.260 --> 01:22:02.190 So, you know, so it was, it was a strong sense of responsibility that somehow 01:22:04.380 --> 01:22:10.830 took over me almost to an autopilot style when somebody else was being victimized. 01:22:11.100 --> 01:22:13.230 But it didn't kick in when I was. 01:22:13.590 --> 01:22:14.370 Does that make sense? 01:22:14.690 --> 01:22:14.910 That's 01:22:14.910 --> 01:22:15.480 interesting. 01:22:16.350 --> 01:22:18.780 And I wonder why, I wonder what a psychologist would turn 01:22:18.780 --> 01:22:20.130 around and say about that. 01:22:20.160 --> 01:22:22.470 I think a psychologist has already taken the day off. 01:22:26.270 --> 01:22:30.930 I spend an hour with you $9,000 and never call me again. 01:22:32.820 --> 01:22:33.570 Oh man. 01:22:34.020 --> 01:22:39.930 Yeah, no, this was specific to, to my, to, you know, a weird propensity 01:22:39.930 --> 01:22:44.760 that I had of stepping up for helping everybody else and just not have 01:22:44.760 --> 01:22:46.170 the ability to do it for myself. 01:22:46.680 --> 01:22:50.760 And, um, which eventually changed substantially. 01:22:52.770 --> 01:22:57.210 Did you, cause you've, you've talked openly about your mother and what 01:22:57.210 --> 01:23:00.360 a great person she was and all the roles that she played in your life. 01:23:00.900 --> 01:23:05.550 Uh, you have talked openly about the lack of a father figure or a lack of a father. 01:23:05.850 --> 01:23:06.390 I should say. 01:23:06.390 --> 01:23:09.060 Maybe not, not necessarily a lack of a father figure. 01:23:09.690 --> 01:23:15.390 I think mothers when children are developing are incredibly, incredibly 01:23:15.390 --> 01:23:17.790 important up to a certain age. 01:23:18.840 --> 01:23:25.050 After a certain age, the father takes priority when a child needs the nurturing 01:23:25.050 --> 01:23:30.180 and the loving and the, the affection that is generally attribute it to a mother. 01:23:31.650 --> 01:23:36.060 When they get to their teenage years, a father will teach a boy how to 01:23:36.060 --> 01:23:40.830 be a man and it'll teach your girls what kind of a man is acceptable 01:23:40.830 --> 01:23:42.240 and how a man should treat a woman. 01:23:42.810 --> 01:23:50.250 Um, did you, did you find somebody in that role to be able to assist 01:23:50.250 --> 01:23:52.500 you in, in your development? 01:23:52.500 --> 01:23:59.820 And do you think that the lack of having the, um, let's say the, the father in your 01:23:59.820 --> 01:24:05.340 life, uh, puts you in a position where you want to stand up for others and you 01:24:05.340 --> 01:24:07.710 want to basically be the man for others? 01:24:09.735 --> 01:24:10.934 Does VanDamme count 01:24:14.264 --> 01:24:14.775 was a reason. 01:24:14.775 --> 01:24:16.005 I learned how to do the splits. 01:24:16.785 --> 01:24:16.965 You 01:24:16.965 --> 01:24:18.675 was the reason why we did a lot of things. 01:24:19.365 --> 01:24:27.465 Um, you know, well, it is while it is important to have a father 01:24:27.465 --> 01:24:32.715 figure, um, there's a lot of people out there with their two parents 01:24:32.805 --> 01:24:36.075 and that's still don't have sure. 01:24:36.144 --> 01:24:37.184 The perfect picture. 01:24:37.245 --> 01:24:37.575 Right? 01:24:37.605 --> 01:24:37.785 Sure. 01:24:38.175 --> 01:24:46.125 And, um, mum knowing all of this, you know, doubled down on making 01:24:46.125 --> 01:24:51.945 certain things happen that she knew were going to be shortcomings in 01:24:51.945 --> 01:24:55.005 my, uh, sort of, you know, life. 01:24:55.155 --> 01:24:55.545 Right. 01:24:56.175 --> 01:25:03.345 And, um, whether or not that's affected me on a subconscious level, I don't know. 01:25:03.945 --> 01:25:12.315 But what I do know is the primary reason why I hated injustice is because 01:25:12.315 --> 01:25:17.625 I was always on the wrong end of it, you know, from a very, very young age. 01:25:17.925 --> 01:25:21.974 Um, and, and this could have been attribute it to a variety of things, 01:25:21.974 --> 01:25:27.795 but one of those was Quebec in the seventies where, and we're 01:25:27.795 --> 01:25:29.135 not talking about Montreal here. 01:25:29.144 --> 01:25:30.585 We we're talking about the north shore. 01:25:30.585 --> 01:25:33.855 You know, the suburbs where it was mostly. 01:25:35.264 --> 01:25:36.434 Visible minorities. 01:25:36.495 --> 01:25:40.275 And I was clearly different, but I was also different. 01:25:40.304 --> 01:25:44.205 So I was different in different, you know, in, in kind of in, 01:25:44.205 --> 01:25:46.545 in, in, in more ways than one. 01:25:47.804 --> 01:25:51.014 And I paid a hefty price for that difference. 01:25:51.554 --> 01:25:56.955 The guy hefty price from a very young age and it was sustained and it was, it wasn't 01:25:56.955 --> 01:25:59.205 just the, it wasn't just the people. 01:25:59.505 --> 01:26:04.245 It wasn't just my peers, my other kids, it was the teachers. 01:26:04.304 --> 01:26:09.884 It was, you know, there was an inherently racist bias. 01:26:09.915 --> 01:26:16.455 And trust me, I am not one to pull out the race card I had never have, but I 01:26:16.455 --> 01:26:19.545 can tell you this, that was blatant. 01:26:20.384 --> 01:26:22.005 It was, it was blatant. 01:26:22.365 --> 01:26:30.465 And it was, you know, the circumstances were such that, you 01:26:30.465 --> 01:26:31.335 know, I'll give you an example. 01:26:31.335 --> 01:26:34.335 I'll give, I'll give you, I'll give you actually two examples, right? 01:26:36.195 --> 01:26:40.394 The inherent bias associated with who I was as an individual, 01:26:40.995 --> 01:26:42.405 based on what I look like. 01:26:42.465 --> 01:26:48.134 Um, you know, one of them, a little girl, so it was some little punks 01:26:48.134 --> 01:26:53.715 were, you know, teasing and doing what kids do consistently, which is fine. 01:26:54.205 --> 01:27:00.255 And one of them kicked a ball at me and in an attempt to hit me with it. 01:27:00.375 --> 01:27:00.705 Right. 01:27:00.735 --> 01:27:03.835 And I, and I raised my knee and the ball bounced off my. 01:27:04.830 --> 01:27:06.810 Into his face. 01:27:07.920 --> 01:27:13.770 And so he now goes to the teacher complaints about me. 01:27:13.830 --> 01:27:15.270 The teacher never comes to me. 01:27:15.540 --> 01:27:19.470 What happens though is during the class, she's going to make a point. 01:27:19.950 --> 01:27:24.090 And I end up on all four with the kids beating me, you know, so she 01:27:24.090 --> 01:27:27.960 puts me down and she essentially allows every single one of those 01:27:27.960 --> 01:27:29.430 kids to come in and throw a kick in. 01:27:30.030 --> 01:27:30.330 Right. 01:27:30.630 --> 01:27:34.890 So there was no attempt at trying to ascertain the facts of what 01:27:34.890 --> 01:27:40.200 happened, because despite the fact that that kid was coming after me, 01:27:40.500 --> 01:27:43.170 I still felt bad for hurting him. 01:27:44.690 --> 01:27:48.270 I, and so there was really no attempt at coming to me and 01:27:48.270 --> 01:27:49.560 say, Hey, what happened here? 01:27:49.560 --> 01:27:52.800 Like, you know, obviously he's bleeding from his nose, the 01:27:52.800 --> 01:27:54.600 ball was returned to his face. 01:27:54.630 --> 01:27:56.190 It sounds like you may have kicked it. 01:27:56.220 --> 01:27:56.820 What happened? 01:27:57.240 --> 01:28:00.540 Well, actually he was trying to hit me and I just raised my knee 01:28:00.600 --> 01:28:02.430 and the knee shield kind of way. 01:28:02.760 --> 01:28:05.070 And the ball bounced off my knee into his face. 01:28:05.670 --> 01:28:06.720 It was accidental. 01:28:07.770 --> 01:28:07.950 Okay. 01:28:07.950 --> 01:28:09.720 So there was no attempt at doing that instead. 01:28:09.720 --> 01:28:10.920 I got a beating, right. 01:28:11.490 --> 01:28:16.620 And so fast forward a year or two later, they ran the first 01:28:16.620 --> 01:28:19.020 ever, uh, school Olympics. 01:28:20.130 --> 01:28:25.080 And in there was ShotPut high jumps sprints. 01:28:25.680 --> 01:28:27.210 Pull-ups like, whatever. 01:28:27.270 --> 01:28:27.720 Right. 01:28:29.940 --> 01:28:30.270 And. 01:28:33.075 --> 01:28:34.785 I don't know how to. 01:28:37.934 --> 01:28:44.565 So anyway, what happens is after two days of competing, I am now 01:28:44.985 --> 01:28:50.025 have won nine out of 10 gold medals and there's one discipline left. 01:28:50.804 --> 01:28:51.165 Okay. 01:28:52.214 --> 01:28:56.384 So tender storm comes in the whole bed. 01:28:56.894 --> 01:29:03.014 We've already seen a room full of throw fees and metals and like accolades, 01:29:03.045 --> 01:29:07.155 you know, out the ying yang for whoever are going to win those disciplines. 01:29:07.905 --> 01:29:10.634 And the teachers have been all over the entire week was about those 01:29:10.634 --> 01:29:12.915 Olympics, those many Olympians, right. 01:29:12.945 --> 01:29:14.205 Or as they call them sure. 01:29:14.665 --> 01:29:15.375 Back in Quebec. 01:29:15.405 --> 01:29:22.514 But, um, now we're on day tour, three I've cleaned up, you know, in every 01:29:22.514 --> 01:29:26.655 single, uh, sports or, or events. 01:29:28.094 --> 01:29:29.144 It starts raining. 01:29:29.144 --> 01:29:32.745 There's some thundering, everything, they shut everything down. 01:29:32.745 --> 01:29:35.445 Then they basically say, okay, we're gonna, we're gonna resume later. 01:29:35.474 --> 01:29:36.045 All this stuff. 01:29:36.195 --> 01:29:37.275 We never resumed. 01:29:38.085 --> 01:29:39.434 We never resumed. 01:29:39.554 --> 01:29:40.094 And. 01:29:40.935 --> 01:29:43.215 We, they never handed out the prizes. 01:29:43.875 --> 01:29:48.255 Like they never handed out the prizes and they never, you know, there 01:29:48.255 --> 01:29:52.365 was never, so it sounds like a very innocuous things, but it's not, it's 01:29:52.365 --> 01:29:54.135 not because here's what happened to me. 01:29:54.495 --> 01:29:55.965 I was a champion, right. 01:29:56.445 --> 01:29:59.145 I was inherently, I was a champion. 01:29:59.175 --> 01:30:02.355 I was born to be one and I was going to be one. 01:30:03.375 --> 01:30:08.805 And the rest of my life was spent being a runner up because I never truly 01:30:08.805 --> 01:30:11.205 believed that I could be the champ. 01:30:11.265 --> 01:30:17.235 And it sounds like an overdramatize, you know, but it isn't, it it's 01:30:17.235 --> 01:30:24.705 taken such a toll on me that I always found myself short of winning and 01:30:24.705 --> 01:30:26.775 it affected me in, in other areas. 01:30:27.075 --> 01:30:31.635 It affected me in math and it affected me and other things because I stopped 01:30:31.635 --> 01:30:38.565 believing I could, you know, I have to being cheated and it took me years. 01:30:38.595 --> 01:30:42.375 It took me years to realize that, like this isn't like, you know, at the time 01:30:42.375 --> 01:30:45.615 I already knew that, you know, you're missing up my life, you know, and it 01:30:45.615 --> 01:30:49.545 wasn't that then it, and it, and it wasn't that it did mess up my life, but 01:30:49.545 --> 01:30:51.675 it certainly has, um, uh, it's had an 01:30:51.675 --> 01:30:52.185 impact. 01:30:53.115 --> 01:30:53.445 It did. 01:30:53.535 --> 01:30:57.315 I mean, that came, there's a few different things that I'd love to chat about here. 01:30:57.315 --> 01:30:59.865 Cause that makes me angry when I hear that. 01:31:00.675 --> 01:31:06.525 And I guess one thing just sort of forget about essentially dealing with 01:31:06.525 --> 01:31:09.645 that anger because that's something that you can carry with you for a long time. 01:31:10.544 --> 01:31:18.585 Um, but I can empathize in some ways too, because I was six foot four. 01:31:18.585 --> 01:31:20.985 By the time I was in grade seven with size, I think it 01:31:20.985 --> 01:31:22.575 was 13 shoes at that time. 01:31:22.575 --> 01:31:25.275 And a towering above everyone, always a tall kid. 01:31:25.754 --> 01:31:27.134 And it was always raised. 01:31:27.134 --> 01:31:29.144 Be careful, you don't know your size. 01:31:29.144 --> 01:31:31.815 You gotta be, don't just go half speed, go half. 01:31:31.905 --> 01:31:37.245 And, uh, the people who were smaller were always encouraged, go hard, go hard. 01:31:37.245 --> 01:31:37.424 Right? 01:31:37.424 --> 01:31:40.464 You gotta, you gotta make up for the fact that this guy has so much and 01:31:40.485 --> 01:31:45.434 you're, it does stick in your psyche, always feeling like, oh, I gotta be 01:31:45.434 --> 01:31:50.205 gentle and never being able to truly live up to your potential so I can 01:31:50.205 --> 01:31:51.464 empathize with some of those things. 01:31:51.464 --> 01:31:54.044 But the part that would make me angry, it's just like the systemic 01:31:54.044 --> 01:31:57.794 racism for no, any other reason how they treat an individual? 01:31:58.304 --> 01:32:03.915 How, how do you, how do you reconcile some of those things? 01:32:03.915 --> 01:32:08.504 Cause what happens in your youth will are things that are slowly 01:32:08.504 --> 01:32:12.785 but surely fired into your brain and by the round 30 years older. 01:32:12.835 --> 01:32:18.554 So they make up your personality, neurons that fire together wire 01:32:18.554 --> 01:32:19.995 together, I think is how they put it. 01:32:20.684 --> 01:32:25.155 And when everything starts solidifying up, despite there is neuro-plasticity 01:32:25.155 --> 01:32:28.335 research that we can start rewiring our brains a certain ways. 01:32:29.054 --> 01:32:36.285 You're probably, if I'm just guests here spending a fair bit of your time, rewire. 01:32:37.530 --> 01:32:42.150 Sort of what happened in your youth into an area that in, into a way 01:32:42.150 --> 01:32:43.800 that you wanted to fire properly now. 01:32:43.800 --> 01:32:46.230 So how do you, how do you deal with that anger? 01:32:46.440 --> 01:32:49.740 And do you find yourself having to rewire yourself? 01:32:50.700 --> 01:32:55.230 Yeah, you know, that's a really interesting question that I think 01:32:55.260 --> 01:33:00.210 Jordan Peterson would be more qualified to answer, but I will say this, um, 01:33:01.680 --> 01:33:09.780 the reason why I was so successful in my, in both my military and my police 01:33:09.780 --> 01:33:14.730 career, and especially in the context of tactical operation, for example, 01:33:14.730 --> 01:33:20.310 is that there is a game that's being played, that there in that game is 01:33:20.370 --> 01:33:22.260 you're not good enough to join us. 01:33:23.490 --> 01:33:24.390 You're not right. 01:33:24.690 --> 01:33:28.980 And so the worst thing you can do to me is to say, we expect you to be 01:33:28.980 --> 01:33:33.480 good at all, but if you're telling me you're nothing and you'll never 01:33:33.480 --> 01:33:34.920 make it, it's like watch this. 01:33:35.680 --> 01:33:36.000 Right. 01:33:36.030 --> 01:33:41.610 And so from a, from a, from a performance, um, from a psychological performance 01:33:41.610 --> 01:33:45.690 standpoint, for me being in environments where I'm consistently being told, 01:33:45.690 --> 01:33:47.760 I'm not good enough is where at Excel. 01:33:49.245 --> 01:33:53.735 Whereas if, if it's too, if it's, if it's, if there's a certain expectations 01:33:53.735 --> 01:33:57.195 that I'm absolutely going to be the greatest, then I start, you know, 01:33:57.225 --> 01:34:00.135 that's when self doubt would start to creep in and that kind of stuff. 01:34:00.135 --> 01:34:06.885 So what I know happened over the years is I just channel that anger, like 01:34:07.335 --> 01:34:11.595 anger firing in all directions is one of the worst emotion you can possibly. 01:34:11.595 --> 01:34:13.965 And it's the bodyguard of sadness, right? 01:34:13.965 --> 01:34:15.675 They're referred to it as a bodyguard of sadness. 01:34:15.675 --> 01:34:16.605 There's a reason for that. 01:34:16.635 --> 01:34:21.765 And it's also one that's really easy to exteriorize. 01:34:21.765 --> 01:34:24.675 It's one of the emotions, that's the easiest to exteriorize, it's also one 01:34:24.675 --> 01:34:33.855 of the most damaging one, but also it has tremendous, um, ability if used, if 01:34:34.995 --> 01:34:38.325 channeled properly to use it for fuel. 01:34:38.775 --> 01:34:42.765 And that's essentially what I did is I had a lot of anger. 01:34:42.795 --> 01:34:51.315 I had a lot of resentment and, um, and I, I essentially knew that being successful 01:34:51.405 --> 01:34:57.705 in whatever I took on was the best way to get payback, being that person that 01:34:57.705 --> 01:34:59.925 can and will and would get it done. 01:35:00.405 --> 01:35:04.755 Uh, and so in my teenage years at about, I would say. 01:35:05.520 --> 01:35:09.840 1718 ish is when it truly, it truly happened. 01:35:09.840 --> 01:35:13.740 And I started being very focused on where I was going and how I 01:35:13.740 --> 01:35:20.010 was going to go about doing that and using the fuel to essentially, 01:35:20.070 --> 01:35:22.470 you know, drive myself forward. 01:35:22.470 --> 01:35:27.270 So it was a rechanneling and I don't know if it just happened 01:35:27.270 --> 01:35:32.580 organically or if somehow there was a trigger, you know, I don't know, 01:35:32.850 --> 01:35:33.360 dressing. 01:35:34.140 --> 01:35:39.990 So, you know, when people look back, sometimes they'll look at things that 01:35:39.990 --> 01:35:45.420 have happened and that will evoke emotions of anger or regret, or, uh, 01:35:45.450 --> 01:35:48.330 maybe they'll just look at something and say, Hey, that's a good experience. 01:35:48.330 --> 01:35:49.950 I learned from what liquid I've growed to. 01:35:49.950 --> 01:35:54.510 They've been able to frame it in the proximal way, but often I found that, 01:35:55.410 --> 01:36:04.560 uh, looking to the past will, if you're going to feel any regret or remorse, 01:36:04.620 --> 01:36:07.380 that's all going to be past based fear. 01:36:07.410 --> 01:36:09.840 Fear is in my opinion, enemy completely. 01:36:09.840 --> 01:36:12.480 Future-based it's got nothing to do with your present reality. 01:36:12.480 --> 01:36:13.950 It's got everything to do often 01:36:13.950 --> 01:36:15.660 doesn't have anything to do with reality. 01:36:15.750 --> 01:36:16.230 Totally, 01:36:16.680 --> 01:36:17.130 totally. 01:36:17.130 --> 01:36:17.400 Right. 01:36:17.400 --> 01:36:18.960 Like people are afraid of the dark. 01:36:19.470 --> 01:36:19.920 Okay. 01:36:19.920 --> 01:36:22.800 Why put the light switch on and it's, and it's bright out. 01:36:22.830 --> 01:36:27.090 I remember as a kid, actually, I was afraid of the dark and I think a lot of 01:36:27.090 --> 01:36:31.710 kids are, and I am, my father was ERT. 01:36:31.710 --> 01:36:32.820 He was in charge of them for. 01:36:33.540 --> 01:36:36.750 I think it was about seven years actually, um, for Vancouver. 01:36:37.410 --> 01:36:43.590 And so, um, brought out a duffel bag and I put on the Bella cloud, black makeup and 01:36:44.310 --> 01:36:50.280 get all darkened up and learning about, uh, uh, the principles of camouflage and 01:36:50.310 --> 01:36:56.400 shine, gene movement, silhouette shadow, like all the, uh, the general things. 01:36:56.400 --> 01:36:59.400 And he says, okay, now you are the night. 01:36:59.820 --> 01:37:03.840 Now you are the darkness and you are what other things in the dark or afraid of. 01:37:03.870 --> 01:37:04.230 Right. 01:37:04.230 --> 01:37:10.200 And so just that simple reframe of the, of the, uh, of the idea, but, 01:37:10.380 --> 01:37:16.080 you know, getting back to fear, being sort of a forward looking thing. 01:37:16.920 --> 01:37:23.730 Um, have you found yourself in situations where you're feeling fear and everyone 01:37:23.730 --> 01:37:27.210 does, I think at some point or another, and how would you deal with that? 01:37:28.830 --> 01:37:31.080 Well, it depends. 01:37:31.080 --> 01:37:32.610 And the answer is, it depends, right? 01:37:32.610 --> 01:37:35.670 Because contextually, it makes a big difference for me. 01:37:35.670 --> 01:37:41.070 So for example, professionally, um, professionally induced fear where there's 01:37:41.070 --> 01:37:45.990 a reasonable fear of harm, say on a, on a tactical operation, but then there's also 01:37:45.990 --> 01:37:49.890 a disconnect because it's a professional achievement, it's a professional, uh, 01:37:49.920 --> 01:37:55.860 you know, so then you can, it makes it easier to address in that context. 01:37:56.160 --> 01:38:01.230 And then you have the fear of say, um, you know, I have two teenagers, right? 01:38:01.965 --> 01:38:04.185 And one of them will be driving next year. 01:38:04.575 --> 01:38:05.625 That's terrifying. 01:38:06.375 --> 01:38:11.775 It's a terrifying prospect because I feel like she is a 11 in maturity, you 01:38:11.775 --> 01:38:13.725 know, level, and this is no secret. 01:38:13.725 --> 01:38:15.285 Like she can listen to this and she knows it. 01:38:16.185 --> 01:38:16.545 Well, that's 01:38:16.545 --> 01:38:17.265 your perception. 01:38:17.535 --> 01:38:20.955 Of course he clearly isn't, but that's just the perception that we have because 01:38:20.955 --> 01:38:22.785 there always are our babies to us. 01:38:23.415 --> 01:38:23.735 And, 01:38:23.735 --> 01:38:28.245 and so, and so, you know, I would say those are our two different 01:38:28.545 --> 01:38:29.595 two different things, right. 01:38:29.925 --> 01:38:35.025 And the way, the way I dealt with a fear and I, and I don't recall 01:38:35.025 --> 01:38:38.894 like being, you know, overly fearful in the professional realm. 01:38:39.975 --> 01:38:45.075 Um, mainly because we maintain tactical advantage, we've maintained, 01:38:45.225 --> 01:38:48.405 you know, there's a variety of things that we can do to address 01:38:49.755 --> 01:38:55.125 the issues that could potentially make that fear become a reality. 01:38:55.245 --> 01:38:56.715 And the team helps with that. 01:38:56.715 --> 01:38:57.075 That's right. 01:38:57.885 --> 01:38:58.065 That's 01:38:58.065 --> 01:38:58.335 right. 01:38:58.515 --> 01:39:02.295 And then when it was on an individual basis, I had been where I had been, 01:39:02.295 --> 01:39:05.144 I'd been at bounce surgery in the biker war, in Iraq machine that hell's 01:39:05.144 --> 01:39:06.735 angels I've, you know, there's a ton. 01:39:06.765 --> 01:39:14.085 So my sort of threshold for fear was quite high and very rarely do we encounter that. 01:39:14.535 --> 01:39:15.525 So it wasn't a big issue. 01:39:16.095 --> 01:39:20.594 Um, On, uh, on the personal side, I mean, it's no different right 01:39:20.594 --> 01:39:24.465 now with my daughters and my daughter getting her license next 01:39:24.465 --> 01:39:26.535 year and it is a part of life. 01:39:26.565 --> 01:39:29.835 And it's just about letting go, that's it. 01:39:29.985 --> 01:39:31.155 There is nothing else. 01:39:31.184 --> 01:39:32.804 There is nothing else I'm going to do. 01:39:32.804 --> 01:39:35.025 I'm going to have the conversations with her. 01:39:35.355 --> 01:39:40.065 I'm going to have to, um, you know, I, I know there are 01:39:40.065 --> 01:39:42.165 advanced driver courses out there. 01:39:42.165 --> 01:39:43.575 I want her to have that. 01:39:43.605 --> 01:39:45.735 I want her to have defensive driving. 01:39:45.855 --> 01:39:50.684 Once she's had some time on the road, you know, also to provide her with the tools 01:39:51.525 --> 01:39:55.605 to mitigate the risk, not to eliminate the risk, because there's always a risk. 01:39:56.384 --> 01:40:01.995 If I provide the tools to mitigate the risk and something happens, something 01:40:02.085 --> 01:40:03.855 happens, you know what I mean? 01:40:03.855 --> 01:40:05.205 But it's a different story. 01:40:05.235 --> 01:40:10.394 If, from my perspective, if I haven't done everything I could to mitigate the 01:40:10.394 --> 01:40:15.075 risk and then something happens now, now there's the constant going back. 01:40:15.075 --> 01:40:16.125 What could have been done? 01:40:16.155 --> 01:40:18.285 What could have been done better to make her safer? 01:40:18.285 --> 01:40:23.144 What could have been, you know, so I, it's almost like fear of being a very emotion. 01:40:23.505 --> 01:40:27.795 Um, emotionally based sorta reaction. 01:40:30.915 --> 01:40:34.545 Most of the time can be controlled with. 01:40:35.684 --> 01:40:39.245 Rational thoughts, which has, you know, provided that there 01:40:39.245 --> 01:40:40.545 are grounded in reality. 01:40:41.085 --> 01:40:44.595 So if I know there is a process to make her that much better at 01:40:44.595 --> 01:40:47.205 driving I've will reduce my fear. 01:40:47.265 --> 01:40:47.925 It's not good. 01:40:47.955 --> 01:40:52.875 It will not eliminate my fear, but it will reduce it to a manageable level, 01:40:52.875 --> 01:40:54.585 which is what we should strive to be. 01:40:54.644 --> 01:40:54.915 Right. 01:40:55.545 --> 01:40:59.715 And then there's a, there's a, there's a, an element of, 01:40:59.835 --> 01:41:01.575 of luck in everything as well. 01:41:01.575 --> 01:41:04.575 And you know, you have to know that, but the harder you work, the 01:41:04.575 --> 01:41:06.255 luckier, you think you seem to get 01:41:06.885 --> 01:41:08.085 how that works weird. 01:41:08.115 --> 01:41:08.385 Yeah. 01:41:08.745 --> 01:41:13.485 So for, for that specifically, and I'm using this as an example, that's 01:41:13.485 --> 01:41:19.425 going to be my way to risk mitigate and mine manage my fear because otherwise 01:41:19.425 --> 01:41:20.385 we know what's going to happen. 01:41:20.415 --> 01:41:21.795 I'm going to be overbearing. 01:41:22.515 --> 01:41:27.015 I'm going to, you know, and, and, and you can do, you, you can actually, 01:41:27.255 --> 01:41:31.815 um, send somebody in the tailspin that you're trying to avoid by 01:41:31.815 --> 01:41:33.285 creating all this extra pressure. 01:41:33.825 --> 01:41:34.065 You know? 01:41:34.065 --> 01:41:38.445 So now I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm say transferring my fear to her by saying 01:41:38.445 --> 01:41:41.175 now she's, uh, not a confident driver. 01:41:41.175 --> 01:41:41.385 Now. 01:41:41.385 --> 01:41:45.255 She is terrified of everything that moves and now she's focusing on the 01:41:45.255 --> 01:41:49.335 wrong things or not, you know, and maybe she gets in an accident as a result 01:41:49.394 --> 01:41:55.815 of having being so overwhelmed by the fearful emotions that I transmitted 01:41:55.815 --> 01:42:00.675 over, you know, and again, there's much people that are much smarter than me. 01:42:01.440 --> 01:42:03.480 That could definitely pick that apart. 01:42:03.480 --> 01:42:07.230 But for me, that's the way that I mitigate fear. 01:42:07.349 --> 01:42:09.570 In most scenarios, you realize 01:42:09.570 --> 01:42:12.990 you just provided her with a perfect out for her, for facts, that's your fault. 01:42:13.530 --> 01:42:14.250 And then of course it is. 01:42:15.240 --> 01:42:17.759 She also knows about the flection to so be taking blaming 01:42:19.469 --> 01:42:20.910 smart kids, smart kid. 01:42:21.000 --> 01:42:21.240 Yeah. 01:42:22.429 --> 01:42:24.929 You are transitioning. 01:42:24.990 --> 01:42:29.700 You're transitioning from a position within law enforcement at a high level. 01:42:30.269 --> 01:42:33.780 And maybe you're looking back and said, I should have got my surgery 01:42:33.780 --> 01:42:35.009 while I was still on the job. 01:42:36.960 --> 01:42:41.849 But, um, there's a transition process now back into civilian life. 01:42:42.120 --> 01:42:47.280 Um, I know some people seem to be able to do that rather gracefully. 01:42:48.360 --> 01:42:52.349 Some people have a very difficult time in my observations. 01:42:52.349 --> 01:42:55.410 It's usually not something that they find difficult right off the get go. 01:42:55.830 --> 01:42:58.259 The first difficult part is like, what am I going to do with all my 01:42:58.259 --> 01:43:02.280 time then it's how do I organize my time in a productive way? 01:43:02.280 --> 01:43:04.799 Because it feels like I have just so many things to do all the time. 01:43:04.799 --> 01:43:07.200 Now, when I previously that was well organized. 01:43:07.799 --> 01:43:15.389 And then I see the transition going towards, um, people wearing all 01:43:15.389 --> 01:43:17.490 their police shirts and police stuff. 01:43:17.519 --> 01:43:21.240 So they can advertise to people that they were at one point law enforcement, 01:43:21.240 --> 01:43:26.880 because there may be missing that level of, uh, What that brought to them. 01:43:27.780 --> 01:43:31.800 And you know, one of my, uh, one of my friends he's been 01:43:31.800 --> 01:43:33.180 retired for some time now. 01:43:33.180 --> 01:43:37.140 And, uh, he says one of the most difficult things that he's fighting 01:43:37.140 --> 01:43:40.650 as he gets older, as he does, he doesn't feel dangerous anymore. 01:43:40.650 --> 01:43:41.730 And it sounds weird. 01:43:41.730 --> 01:43:45.840 It sounds like, ah, who cares to a lot of people, but to somebody who spent 01:43:45.840 --> 01:43:51.090 his lifetime and in his profession, feeling dangerous and feeling capable 01:43:51.090 --> 01:43:52.860 control of all these situations. 01:43:53.460 --> 01:43:57.510 Uh, that's a, that's a difficult thing to square. 01:43:57.720 --> 01:44:02.160 You are now transitioning from law enforcement, you're transitioning into 01:44:02.160 --> 01:44:07.260 civilian life and your fast tracking some of these things by some of the, 01:44:07.320 --> 01:44:11.400 uh, physical issues that you're, you're working with right now and working 01:44:11.400 --> 01:44:13.080 through, how are you finding that? 01:44:15.030 --> 01:44:20.700 Yeah, so, you know, one of the, one of the issues that seem to play 01:44:20.730 --> 01:44:26.100 the policing in the military world is letting the job define you. 01:44:26.940 --> 01:44:28.110 And I have never done that. 01:44:28.590 --> 01:44:33.270 However, how much, how much I, you know, however much I loved the job. 01:44:33.330 --> 01:44:34.830 I never let it define me. 01:44:35.400 --> 01:44:40.020 And I did that by engaging in outside activities. 01:44:40.050 --> 01:44:40.580 I did that. 01:44:41.805 --> 01:44:47.235 Um, having friends that were not cops, I did that by finding a sense of purpose and 01:44:47.475 --> 01:44:52.515 in various other things like the gym, for example, when I was, when I was owning two 01:44:52.515 --> 01:44:57.075 CrossFit gyms and I was actually a coach there and I was teaching my athletes and 01:44:57.075 --> 01:45:00.915 then the other side, when my martial arts studio and with jujitsu and everything. 01:45:00.915 --> 01:45:07.815 So I had all this infrastructure around me and so policing and being, uh, on 01:45:07.815 --> 01:45:11.175 ERT or being a teammate or being a Sergeant major or whatever the case 01:45:11.175 --> 01:45:14.595 may be was simply a part of who I was. 01:45:14.595 --> 01:45:20.175 But it wasn't who I was, if it is who you are, when you are no longer, 01:45:20.235 --> 01:45:21.855 we're having some serious issues. 01:45:22.305 --> 01:45:26.955 One of the things that I was on a course in a week with a certain special 01:45:26.955 --> 01:45:33.105 operation unit, and one of the key problems that kept on resurfacing was 01:45:33.195 --> 01:45:37.845 when members go overseas and there are these special operator type, like, you 01:45:37.845 --> 01:45:42.535 know, super studs and, and, and super humans really, um, would, would get, 01:45:42.585 --> 01:45:44.715 say blown up or something would happen. 01:45:44.715 --> 01:45:49.755 Then they would come back and all, as they, they had was this defining, you 01:45:49.755 --> 01:45:52.655 know, mission set and does define. 01:45:53.445 --> 01:45:57.645 Job the date that they had, and now they're finding themselves, you know, 01:45:57.825 --> 01:46:03.255 um, sounds purpose and with, and it's not the case, but that was the perception 01:46:03.255 --> 01:46:05.565 and how difficult those situations were. 01:46:06.015 --> 01:46:09.325 We've seen it on the RCMP side where people retire after 33, 01:46:09.325 --> 01:46:12.435 34, 35 years and die within one. 01:46:13.125 --> 01:46:13.455 Right? 01:46:13.875 --> 01:46:17.325 Because, because now all of a sudden it's all, all of this has gone. 01:46:17.895 --> 01:46:21.195 So there is, there is quite a few traps, which is again, part of the book and 01:46:21.195 --> 01:46:27.705 you know, that to avoid, to avoid going down the path of letting your job define 01:46:27.705 --> 01:46:30.555 you now with that is a sense of reality. 01:46:31.155 --> 01:46:32.535 Are you dangerous though? 01:46:34.515 --> 01:46:35.745 Are you, you know what I mean? 01:46:35.775 --> 01:46:40.185 Because arguably it depends, 01:46:41.715 --> 01:46:41.955 right? 01:46:41.955 --> 01:46:43.845 It depends on how you define dangerous. 01:46:43.875 --> 01:46:45.375 What does that, what does that even mean? 01:46:45.825 --> 01:46:46.215 Right. 01:46:46.515 --> 01:46:51.315 Because if I stand in a lineup at the bank as a BJJ black belt and I 01:46:51.315 --> 01:46:52.605 look around and there's eight people. 01:46:53.880 --> 01:46:57.540 There's a good chance, you know, I'm the person in there, there is a 01:46:57.540 --> 01:47:01.260 good chance that could, that could potentially inflict harm on others. 01:47:01.830 --> 01:47:02.400 Guess what? 01:47:02.460 --> 01:47:06.180 Every street corner is somebody that can, and you you're you're you're behind. 01:47:06.630 --> 01:47:06.930 Right. 01:47:07.380 --> 01:47:09.570 And then a, we want to talk about gun fighting. 01:47:09.960 --> 01:47:10.380 Sure. 01:47:10.530 --> 01:47:11.670 Let's let's talk about this. 01:47:11.670 --> 01:47:15.900 Would you, would you bet, you know, would you, would you gamble your next 01:47:15.900 --> 01:47:19.620 gunfight as thinking that you are the best shooter you've ever met ever? 01:47:19.860 --> 01:47:20.550 Do you know what I mean? 01:47:20.760 --> 01:47:24.780 And so, and so there is an overinflation, there is a propensity 01:47:24.780 --> 01:47:27.090 to overinflate one's capabilities. 01:47:28.290 --> 01:47:30.090 So let's take the same scenario. 01:47:30.390 --> 01:47:33.360 I'm standing in the lineup in the bank, and now there's a, there's a, 01:47:33.420 --> 01:47:37.560 you know, pro MMA fighters with like 45 fights and all this good stuff. 01:47:37.590 --> 01:47:42.660 Like all of a sudden my, my so-called toughness just taken a back seat. 01:47:42.870 --> 01:47:43.070 Right? 01:47:43.560 --> 01:47:47.040 Cause now I have somebody in there that's actually paid to fight. 01:47:47.130 --> 01:47:49.260 That's their job to be that much better. 01:47:49.500 --> 01:47:51.810 And it's not to say that there is no way I can win. 01:47:52.170 --> 01:47:58.019 But the point I'm making is part of define letting a job to find you as 01:47:58.019 --> 01:48:05.280 the, over in the overinflation of the importance of you within the context of 01:48:05.280 --> 01:48:09.600 that operation, you know, it's not true. 01:48:11.310 --> 01:48:13.530 It's not like when said love was left. 01:48:13.530 --> 01:48:17.550 The outfit, people can say, oh, you know, it was a great loss 01:48:17.550 --> 01:48:18.730 and all this stuff, those are. 01:48:19.605 --> 01:48:23.625 Human interpersonal connections, but in the big scheme of things, 01:48:25.065 --> 01:48:26.054 the machine keeps turning. 01:48:26.175 --> 01:48:26.894 It just does. 01:48:27.465 --> 01:48:27.764 Right. 01:48:27.795 --> 01:48:31.844 And, and so I can't stand there and overinflate my importance. 01:48:31.844 --> 01:48:35.894 So the importance that the organization, inversely, overinflate, the importance 01:48:35.894 --> 01:48:39.135 that the organization had for me, right. 01:48:40.844 --> 01:48:42.675 That stuff it's hard to do. 01:48:43.184 --> 01:48:43.635 It is. 01:48:44.085 --> 01:48:49.635 Um, so you left after 20 years, you felt like you've done your thing. 01:48:49.665 --> 01:48:54.105 You could've got a better pension if you wanted to keep plugging away and going 01:48:54.105 --> 01:49:02.085 through for another 10 years, but you left for a reason, what was that reason? 01:49:02.415 --> 01:49:04.394 What I left for a variety of reasons. 01:49:04.605 --> 01:49:12.135 But the primary reason was that my, I joined the RCMP to be on 01:49:12.135 --> 01:49:13.335 the emergency response team. 01:49:13.965 --> 01:49:18.255 That was my sole purpose in life in terms of professional purpose in life. 01:49:18.285 --> 01:49:20.295 I that's what I wanted the most. 01:49:21.165 --> 01:49:25.425 I had been there and I was given an opportunity to return there after my 01:49:25.425 --> 01:49:30.764 stint, as a Sergeant major, basically as a operational noncommissioned officer. 01:49:30.775 --> 01:49:35.025 So I would, I would went back there as the team leader for the team leaders. 01:49:35.715 --> 01:49:36.014 Okay. 01:49:37.455 --> 01:49:41.325 And so I'd taken the job I'd said yes to it and everything. 01:49:41.535 --> 01:49:43.724 And every morning I started waking up. 01:49:44.965 --> 01:49:46.555 Or having a hard time sleeping. 01:49:46.555 --> 01:49:49.915 I was, I, you know, and some, yes seems, seems to, and I've been 01:49:49.915 --> 01:49:55.255 an insomniac most of my career, but, um, but it made things worse. 01:49:55.255 --> 01:49:59.635 And then I had to come to the realization, looking at myself in the mirror that 01:50:00.145 --> 01:50:02.125 perhaps you don't want to go back. 01:50:02.215 --> 01:50:03.445 Is that a possibility? 01:50:03.445 --> 01:50:05.275 And I had to ask myself the tough question. 01:50:05.695 --> 01:50:07.765 And then I started thinking it's been two years. 01:50:07.765 --> 01:50:10.525 I haven't been on called I haven't been dragged out of bed. 01:50:10.705 --> 01:50:13.435 My stress level is incredibly manageable. 01:50:13.795 --> 01:50:17.755 I haven't, I don't have to deal with, you know, tactical operation, the resolving of 01:50:17.755 --> 01:50:24.415 same and, you know, uh, HR related issues with, and it's not with our personal 01:50:24.475 --> 01:50:28.855 PR proper, but just the administration of such a, a high-speed team. 01:50:29.725 --> 01:50:36.175 And so w what happened was I, I was honest with myself and I, I said to 01:50:36.175 --> 01:50:38.125 myself, I don't think you want to go back. 01:50:39.175 --> 01:50:41.845 And I don't think you should go back if you don't want to go back, 01:50:41.845 --> 01:50:46.015 because I know that you are going to have to give your life to the team 01:50:46.285 --> 01:50:48.625 again, in order to make that happen. 01:50:48.715 --> 01:50:52.555 You know, so I knew there was, there was going to be a ton of 01:50:52.555 --> 01:50:55.015 sacrifice of the things that. 01:50:57.650 --> 01:51:03.230 I was now connected with, after being off the on-call off, getting pulled out 01:51:03.230 --> 01:51:07.849 of all the events with the family and, you know, the dance recitals and the 01:51:07.849 --> 01:51:12.049 birthdays and this and that and the other, which I missed a ton of along the way. 01:51:12.620 --> 01:51:15.500 So I came to a realization that I didn't want to go back. 01:51:15.620 --> 01:51:17.750 So now what if I don't want to go back? 01:51:17.780 --> 01:51:20.389 And that's the only reason why I was here in the first place. 01:51:20.450 --> 01:51:24.019 Now, what I either found a new passion within the 01:51:24.019 --> 01:51:26.269 organization, or I go elsewhere. 01:51:27.259 --> 01:51:34.280 And what ended up contributing to me going that way was that I 01:51:34.280 --> 01:51:38.269 started wanting to pursue meaningful things with meaningful people. 01:51:38.990 --> 01:51:41.570 And that's what I, you know, that's kind of my, and I don't like to call 01:51:41.570 --> 01:51:44.360 them buzzwords, but that's my buzzwords right now, meaningful things with 01:51:44.360 --> 01:51:46.160 meaningful people is what I'm after. 01:51:46.969 --> 01:51:53.000 And so I really wanted to take my skillset, my acquired skillset, 01:51:53.929 --> 01:51:57.830 profession, professional skillset, and, and transpose it to the civilian 01:51:57.830 --> 01:52:01.790 world while taken on the things that I truly wanted to take on. 01:52:02.299 --> 01:52:12.240 And being, you know, this basically using passion and, and, and judgment. 01:52:14.190 --> 01:52:20.280 To get the things that I really wanted to get engaged with done rather than 01:52:20.309 --> 01:52:23.339 doing 90% things that I had to do. 01:52:23.429 --> 01:52:25.469 And 10% things that I wanted to do. 01:52:27.290 --> 01:52:27.500 Yeah. 01:52:27.870 --> 01:52:32.070 That's a, well, you're definitely making those strides really quickly. 01:52:32.730 --> 01:52:36.269 I was climbing in Squamish with a friend of mine and he brought another 01:52:36.269 --> 01:52:40.110 friend of his, um, and buddy of mine. 01:52:40.110 --> 01:52:45.419 He's been on the podcast before and was his buddy, uh, his ex JTF deal. 01:52:45.900 --> 01:52:49.740 And he said, you know, I th that's all I figured I wanted to do. 01:52:49.740 --> 01:52:54.120 And so I worked for, I worked hard for God onto JTF too. 01:52:54.240 --> 01:52:58.620 And I looked around and these people weren't like me and 01:52:58.620 --> 01:52:59.820 I didn't feel like I fit in. 01:53:00.210 --> 01:53:06.089 And I, I withdrew myself after all of that work that I put on. 01:53:06.089 --> 01:53:07.259 It was on there for a while. 01:53:07.259 --> 01:53:10.290 He says, you know, just some of the things where he was in his head 01:53:10.290 --> 01:53:13.200 a lot, from what I gather, he was thinking a lot, they said, go in 01:53:13.200 --> 01:53:15.509 this room, shoot all these targets. 01:53:15.509 --> 01:53:15.660 Right. 01:53:15.660 --> 01:53:19.860 And of course, some of the targets are ones that are made to look in a sense. 01:53:19.860 --> 01:53:22.290 And, um, he comes and he's like, I, I get it. 01:53:22.290 --> 01:53:25.620 I get the process of going in follow orders, shoot, and go through. 01:53:25.620 --> 01:53:29.610 But I mean, there's a target of a, um, the mother with a child or there's an, 01:53:29.620 --> 01:53:33.599 and I, I would articulate afterwards why I didn't shoot, but that wasn't part of 01:53:33.599 --> 01:53:35.519 this particular drill that we were doing. 01:53:36.120 --> 01:53:44.415 Um, So he withdrew himself because he didn't figure that it didn't turn out to 01:53:44.415 --> 01:53:46.755 be exactly what he was hoping it would be. 01:53:47.595 --> 01:53:52.575 Did you find when you got yourself on with ERT, did it live up to the 01:53:52.575 --> 01:53:55.455 expectations of what you were hoping it would be, or were there differences in 01:53:55.455 --> 01:53:56.895 there that you weren't even expecting 01:54:00.485 --> 01:54:06.125 without launching into, you know, um, what was said? 01:54:06.125 --> 01:54:14.195 I will say it is, there is nobody walking around of any organization after either 01:54:14.195 --> 01:54:16.505 leaving it or being asked to leave it, 01:54:20.285 --> 01:54:25.745 that paints pictures of the issue being themselves, you know? 01:54:26.255 --> 01:54:29.375 And so I, I'm not suggesting that it's, I'm not suggesting 01:54:29.375 --> 01:54:30.395 that it's the case here. 01:54:30.455 --> 01:54:30.725 Oh, it's 01:54:30.725 --> 01:54:30.815 a 01:54:30.815 --> 01:54:37.085 hundred percent but case here, but is generally, is generally when people 01:54:37.085 --> 01:54:41.225 are leaving or when people are asked to leave a certain unit or decide to leave 01:54:41.225 --> 01:54:48.185 a certain unit, there is an inherent, something was off with the unit and, 01:54:48.735 --> 01:54:54.185 and, and, and I just didn't jive with it, or somebody did this or how I was 01:54:54.185 --> 01:54:55.865 wrong by this person at that person. 01:54:55.865 --> 01:54:59.855 So I would love for in a case like this, what I like to do is I 01:54:59.855 --> 01:55:01.625 would love to have the version of. 01:55:02.475 --> 01:55:05.295 The instructors that were watching and what the drill was, and they know 01:55:05.295 --> 01:55:07.485 like, what were the circumstances? 01:55:07.665 --> 01:55:07.875 Right. 01:55:08.175 --> 01:55:13.335 You know, because you can build a drill as, you know, you can, you can 01:55:13.335 --> 01:55:18.615 build a drill and make it that it's a completely different, like the decisions 01:55:18.645 --> 01:55:24.645 that you were going to make inside that room are based upon the context 01:55:24.645 --> 01:55:26.205 and the totality of the circumstances. 01:55:26.265 --> 01:55:26.565 Right? 01:55:26.985 --> 01:55:32.715 So in 99.9, nine, 9% of the time shooting that mother with the 01:55:32.715 --> 01:55:34.245 kid is completely unacceptable. 01:55:34.275 --> 01:55:34.545 Right. 01:55:34.725 --> 01:55:39.345 It leaves the 0.09%, where information is given that changes 01:55:39.345 --> 01:55:42.165 that, that wasn't a kid who was naive or whatever. 01:55:42.165 --> 01:55:42.465 Right. 01:55:43.185 --> 01:55:43.785 Exactly. 01:55:43.845 --> 01:55:44.955 Or that she was rigged. 01:55:45.075 --> 01:55:45.405 Right. 01:55:45.705 --> 01:55:46.485 Even with a kid. 01:55:46.545 --> 01:55:46.935 Right. 01:55:46.995 --> 01:55:51.945 And so, um, I would love to, you know, I would love to kind of dive into it 01:55:51.945 --> 01:55:56.175 and get the two sides because there's generally one side the other end and the 01:55:56.175 --> 01:55:57.465 truth, somewhere in the middle where he 01:55:57.465 --> 01:56:01.035 openly says it is what it is, but it wasn't him. 01:56:01.095 --> 01:56:05.145 And he was the one that didn't fit in that piece of the equation, because 01:56:05.535 --> 01:56:05.835 sure. 01:56:05.835 --> 01:56:10.365 But what I don't like about that, what I don't like about that statement is that 01:56:10.365 --> 01:56:14.235 it implies that everybody in that room was cool with shooting a kid in a FENa mum. 01:56:15.135 --> 01:56:15.405 And 01:56:15.435 --> 01:56:16.935 that that's, that's a good point. 01:56:16.965 --> 01:56:19.895 And that I don't believe in, I don't, I don't, I don't believe so. 01:56:20.125 --> 01:56:21.485 There's so there's something missing. 01:56:21.855 --> 01:56:22.185 Right. 01:56:22.545 --> 01:56:28.875 And, um, and w w w whatever that might be it's it's because people 01:56:28.875 --> 01:56:30.465 that are not familiar with the. 01:56:31.500 --> 01:56:35.820 Units and the way they operate is very different from the traditional military in 01:56:35.820 --> 01:56:37.830 the idea that people have on world war II. 01:56:37.860 --> 01:56:39.450 When you're going to do this, you're going to do that. 01:56:39.480 --> 01:56:45.750 We're talking about intellectual humans with incredible physical capacity that are 01:56:45.750 --> 01:56:50.400 very capable of problem solving and not only very capable, but they are expected 01:56:50.400 --> 01:56:55.290 to problem solve things without the help of the leaders, you know, and very quick. 01:56:55.530 --> 01:56:56.250 Absolutely. 01:56:56.250 --> 01:57:01.250 And so for you, for somebody to tell me that everybody in that room was still 01:57:01.290 --> 01:57:05.219 equal with murdering a mom and a child, it just, there's something that's, 01:57:05.750 --> 01:57:09.490 that's completely against the soft, um, 01:57:10.410 --> 01:57:13.950 which of course they aren't and they weren't, and they weren't. 01:57:14.070 --> 01:57:15.670 So that's, so that's all I did. 01:57:15.670 --> 01:57:17.519 That's the reason why I'm saying that I w I would 01:57:17.519 --> 01:57:21.900 love to hear, I like, I like that perspective because I find that so often 01:57:21.900 --> 01:57:26.820 in everyday life, if someone's going to break up with somebody else, it's because 01:57:26.820 --> 01:57:29.070 the other person was ABC at the time. 01:57:29.639 --> 01:57:34.830 And I find it as an employer, dealing with my coworkers and staff. 01:57:35.969 --> 01:57:40.139 When you can see at some point when somebody comes to a point and it's like, 01:57:40.139 --> 01:57:42.960 you know, they're ready for their next challenge in their life, but they don't 01:57:42.960 --> 01:57:48.509 know how to be able to take that step without trying to demonize something. 01:57:48.570 --> 01:57:51.269 Uh it's whatever it's a customer is, it's the job. 01:57:51.300 --> 01:57:53.639 It's whatever it is, because somehow that it clicks in their 01:57:53.639 --> 01:57:57.389 head as an acceptable way, rather than just saying, you know what? 01:57:57.389 --> 01:58:02.160 I had a good time when I was here, I put my 110% in, um, good, bad 01:58:02.190 --> 01:58:04.769 learned, grew time for my next stage. 01:58:04.830 --> 01:58:10.080 And that's something that I try very hard to relay to everybody that I work with. 01:58:10.440 --> 01:58:14.610 Hey, when it's time and it's your time, we will help you 110%. 01:58:14.639 --> 01:58:17.250 So you can make that next step in a successful way. 01:58:17.250 --> 01:58:20.550 And in fact, I might even have connections in the industry or the other areas 01:58:20.550 --> 01:58:22.290 that you might be looking to go to. 01:58:22.920 --> 01:58:30.840 And that mentality of approaching, um, leaving an individual and 01:58:30.840 --> 01:58:34.469 organization or something else I think is incredibly healthy. 01:58:34.860 --> 01:58:38.280 But I don't think it's shared by most people, most people like you're 01:58:38.280 --> 01:58:41.130 saying, they'll, they'll take the approach of, well, you know, it's 01:58:41.130 --> 01:58:43.290 just me, but it's because of this. 01:58:44.610 --> 01:58:44.940 Yeah. 01:58:44.969 --> 01:58:49.019 I mean, we see it in the PR and promotions processes, and we see it in, you know, 01:58:49.019 --> 01:58:53.099 who was wronged when and how, and who was passed for promotion first. 01:58:53.250 --> 01:58:54.750 I mean, nobody goes, you know what? 01:58:54.750 --> 01:58:56.880 My leadership skills really needed to work. 01:58:57.330 --> 01:58:57.719 I actually. 01:58:58.995 --> 01:59:00.495 Nobody wants to follow me. 01:59:00.825 --> 01:59:01.395 You know what I mean? 01:59:01.665 --> 01:59:06.405 Like I look around, you know, and because it, because it's hard, right? 01:59:06.405 --> 01:59:09.885 It's, it's hard to expose those shortcomings, but it is necessary. 01:59:09.885 --> 01:59:14.205 And having the ability to do so is so liberating, you know, because, 01:59:14.205 --> 01:59:15.705 Hey, you can address the issues. 01:59:15.735 --> 01:59:18.735 You can address the issues if, if the issues are identified. 01:59:19.185 --> 01:59:22.695 But also it's kind of really refreshing to have somebody take 01:59:22.725 --> 01:59:24.465 responsibility for their actions. 01:59:24.465 --> 01:59:27.765 You know, when you're speaking to someone and they come out and say, 01:59:28.215 --> 01:59:33.135 say, this just wasn't for me, it's just, it's just this wasn't for me. 01:59:33.135 --> 01:59:34.455 And I wasn't the right fit. 01:59:34.485 --> 01:59:37.035 And I pulled myself out and I love that. 01:59:37.245 --> 01:59:40.935 I had, uh, I had a I've over the years, I've had so many members come 01:59:40.935 --> 01:59:44.595 to me and say, you know, and, and it's funny because when I walked 01:59:44.595 --> 01:59:48.015 by in an office or something, it's almost like people were drawn to. 01:59:48.960 --> 01:59:51.840 That they were going to get in shape so that it can get to your T. 01:59:51.840 --> 01:59:53.849 So it would be like, you know, all, you know, yeah. 01:59:53.849 --> 01:59:54.780 I'm going to get in shape. 01:59:54.780 --> 01:59:58.320 And, uh, and, uh, and I'm going to try out and do, like, you've told me 01:59:58.320 --> 02:00:03.030 this 28 times in the last five years, you're not trying out, not working 02:00:03.030 --> 02:00:05.910 out or you're not, you're, you're, you're just, you're not going to do it. 02:00:05.910 --> 02:00:10.559 So why are you wasting your time telling me, you know, what you, what you are 02:00:10.559 --> 02:00:14.639 going to do, because there is a sense that the, somehow they feel compelled 02:00:14.639 --> 02:00:18.990 to tell you what they're going to do and, and how they're going to do it. 02:00:19.110 --> 02:00:24.900 Whereas I met this one guy and he's like, I would love your job I'm way too lazy. 02:00:25.170 --> 02:00:30.960 And I just laughed so hard, you know, and, and, and good for him, loved it. 02:00:31.110 --> 02:00:32.099 I was like, 02:00:33.080 --> 02:00:36.269 well, people like to varnish over their own imperfections, 02:00:37.349 --> 02:00:39.269 but like you say, liberating. 02:00:39.300 --> 02:00:39.660 Yeah. 02:00:39.690 --> 02:00:44.700 Empowering completely, totally taking that responsibility from a third party. 02:00:44.970 --> 02:00:48.809 I left because I left this relationship because they are a, B and C, well, 02:00:49.080 --> 02:00:52.710 you know what, there probably a, B and C to begin with, and maybe you 02:00:52.710 --> 02:00:55.380 overlooked it because of Def right. 02:00:55.500 --> 02:00:56.519 Whatever it might be. 02:00:56.519 --> 02:00:57.870 And then now you're coming around to it. 02:00:57.870 --> 02:00:59.849 You're leaving because you've made a personal choice. 02:00:59.849 --> 02:01:00.870 It's time for you to leave. 02:01:02.040 --> 02:01:06.030 Once you're able to take that level of personal responsibility, all of a sudden 02:01:06.030 --> 02:01:10.050 these issues are no longer, you're no longer affected by external issues. 02:01:10.470 --> 02:01:13.290 Everything falls under your locus of control. 02:01:13.320 --> 02:01:16.170 You affect every little aspect of what you do. 02:01:17.460 --> 02:01:18.030 Interesting. 02:01:18.420 --> 02:01:18.720 Yeah. 02:01:18.720 --> 02:01:23.100 And I mean, it, it bleeds into everything and, you know, to go back and this is 02:01:23.100 --> 02:01:26.490 going to sound like I'm kind of going backwards, but when we spoke about 02:01:26.580 --> 02:01:32.100 the way I felt my me being different effected me as a youth, for example, 02:01:32.880 --> 02:01:37.110 it sent me into this other side of things where, when people ask me, like, 02:01:37.170 --> 02:01:41.790 how did you feel as a, as a visible minority, as a, you know, half black 02:01:41.790 --> 02:01:46.860 person, um, in the organization and how, uh, you know, what kind of challenges 02:01:46.860 --> 02:01:47.880 were you against and everything. 02:01:48.210 --> 02:01:48.900 None. 02:01:49.080 --> 02:01:51.420 That's how awesome zero, right? 02:01:51.840 --> 02:01:52.350 Why? 02:01:52.470 --> 02:01:56.370 Because I wasn't, there was no, it wasn't about what every other 02:01:56.370 --> 02:02:02.700 thing could do for me, or for me to see my own failures as a reason. 02:02:02.910 --> 02:02:08.050 Um, as the reason being my color, see, you know, in the organization or my 02:02:08.160 --> 02:02:15.030 skin tone or whatever the case may be, but it re it reversed the onus on me. 02:02:15.030 --> 02:02:16.890 Like what have I, what have I done? 02:02:17.070 --> 02:02:19.080 And what have I done to prevent these things? 02:02:19.080 --> 02:02:21.120 And I just wasn't, I was a hard target. 02:02:21.600 --> 02:02:23.820 You're going to, you know, you are going to pick somebody 02:02:23.820 --> 02:02:24.900 else if you have a choice. 02:02:25.410 --> 02:02:29.760 And so how did you, and it prevented me from falling into a 02:02:29.760 --> 02:02:31.950 trap of like, oh, you know, this. 02:02:32.835 --> 02:02:36.705 Racism related, or this was like pulling the proverbial 02:02:36.705 --> 02:02:38.235 race cards, so to speak, right. 02:02:38.265 --> 02:02:38.895 Pity party. 02:02:38.925 --> 02:02:39.285 Yeah. 02:02:39.555 --> 02:02:44.745 And the thing is, is I have people that have the same skin complexion 02:02:44.745 --> 02:02:49.755 as me that have had issues their entire career everywhere. 02:02:49.755 --> 02:02:50.355 They went. 02:02:50.865 --> 02:02:56.475 It's like, okay, um, I'm not an expert, but it is, it is possible. 02:02:56.475 --> 02:03:02.145 And it is reasonable that you have run into one, two or three people that 02:03:02.355 --> 02:03:07.035 potentially I never ran into that, you know, treated you differently 02:03:07.065 --> 02:03:13.965 on account of X, Y, and Z everywhere you went, everybody is racist. 02:03:14.745 --> 02:03:15.645 You already issue. 02:03:15.885 --> 02:03:16.335 Right. 02:03:16.995 --> 02:03:20.085 There is, there is zero question about it like that. 02:03:20.115 --> 02:03:22.485 You know, it's just, it isn't a reality. 02:03:22.485 --> 02:03:27.045 So it's kind of like the you're, you're driving in traffic in the morning and, and 02:03:27.045 --> 02:03:30.315 you're listening, you listen to radio and on the radio, it says something along the 02:03:30.315 --> 02:03:35.895 lines of, there's a crazy driver driving the wrong way on street, whatever you 02:03:35.895 --> 02:03:37.635 look up and you see a whole bunch of them. 02:03:37.635 --> 02:03:39.495 And you're like, Mara, there's more than one. 02:03:41.565 --> 02:03:43.335 There's more than one it's probably. 02:03:43.905 --> 02:03:44.535 Yes. 02:03:44.745 --> 02:03:45.285 Yes. 02:03:45.555 --> 02:03:47.595 So, so that's a critical piece. 02:03:49.785 --> 02:03:54.225 Stop relegating your failure or your failure to achieve certain things 02:03:54.225 --> 02:03:57.735 based on predicated factors, such as race, gender, those types of things. 02:03:57.735 --> 02:04:00.765 Because a lot of the times it actually had nothing to do with it. 02:04:01.905 --> 02:04:06.525 It's not taken away from the fact that at times it does have to do with it. 02:04:06.795 --> 02:04:07.155 Right. 02:04:07.485 --> 02:04:10.305 But it's a different mindset, you know, I 02:04:10.815 --> 02:04:11.805 a hundred percent follow. 02:04:13.665 --> 02:04:18.465 So what's the next steps here for sub Lavoie and what needs to happen for 02:04:18.465 --> 02:04:20.115 you in order to be able to get there? 02:04:20.235 --> 02:04:22.905 I see a rock and some nice three dark here. 02:04:22.905 --> 02:04:25.965 Are you going to be on one of their commercials or watch watching one earlier? 02:04:25.965 --> 02:04:26.985 That was fantastic. 02:04:26.985 --> 02:04:27.825 Yeah, boys, 02:04:27.885 --> 02:04:28.815 what are you guys doing? 02:04:28.815 --> 02:04:30.165 You need me in your commercial. 02:04:30.825 --> 02:04:31.485 They do. 02:04:32.745 --> 02:04:35.115 Um, yeah, you know, it's, it's, it's funny. 02:04:35.115 --> 02:04:40.905 I, um, I had discovered this, this company out of the UK and, um, to, as I understand 02:04:40.905 --> 02:04:43.395 it to SBS guys are special board services. 02:04:43.395 --> 02:04:45.315 Guys are owners of that company. 02:04:45.315 --> 02:04:51.795 And of course, suffice to say that they're commercial and there is, 02:04:51.885 --> 02:04:53.985 are going to ruin me about that. 02:04:54.645 --> 02:04:59.805 But, uh, but they have, you know, when I, when I encourage a company now, when I 02:04:59.805 --> 02:05:04.485 encourage a business or where it has to be something I truly believe in, and it has 02:05:04.485 --> 02:05:11.685 to be something that suits me personally, you know, um, I may, I may love a nice. 02:05:12.780 --> 02:05:14.940 You know, BMW, whatever. 02:05:14.969 --> 02:05:15.179 Sure. 02:05:15.420 --> 02:05:17.849 But I'm a super snake driver. 02:05:17.849 --> 02:05:22.559 I love Shelby's why, because they, because they're me, you know, and it's, it's, it's 02:05:22.559 --> 02:05:24.299 the same with this, with this company. 02:05:24.299 --> 02:05:32.309 That's truly, um, I think what you are seeing is the tier one excellence being 02:05:32.309 --> 02:05:34.740 exemplified at every step of the way. 02:05:34.740 --> 02:05:39.780 So we are talking about website, we're talking about a product, 02:05:39.780 --> 02:05:42.870 we're talking about packaging, we're talking about delivery. 02:05:42.870 --> 02:05:48.870 We're talking like everything is so dialed in and it's, you know, it has that special 02:05:48.870 --> 02:05:51.030 operation, you know, touch of everything. 02:05:51.030 --> 02:05:55.559 They have everything they touch turns into gold because they have so much of that. 02:05:55.889 --> 02:06:00.809 And so much of that comes from their ability to look inwards and be truly 02:06:01.230 --> 02:06:05.519 critical of their own performance, you know, which is very rare. 02:06:06.299 --> 02:06:10.049 And, and having the ability to do that as allowed them to grow 02:06:10.200 --> 02:06:12.120 substantially really, really quickly. 02:06:12.360 --> 02:06:17.429 And so, um, I will continue encourage companies like this, 02:06:17.429 --> 02:06:18.809 that fall in line exactly. 02:06:18.809 --> 02:06:25.365 With, with the way my mind works, you know, And the product is it's phenomenal. 02:06:26.474 --> 02:06:27.405 It's phenomenal. 02:06:28.275 --> 02:06:30.554 So you've got the book coming out and it's going to be both in 02:06:30.554 --> 02:06:32.565 audio format and a written format. 02:06:32.684 --> 02:06:32.955 Yeah. 02:06:32.955 --> 02:06:40.875 So what we've done with this is, um, you know, we have recorded a ton of 02:06:40.875 --> 02:06:46.485 content and the idea was that following the book there is going to be, I believe 02:06:46.485 --> 02:06:50.955 there is going to be a lot of interest in finding out how that all came about, 02:06:51.315 --> 02:06:55.065 how it unfolded some of the funnies, you know, behind the conversations. 02:06:55.065 --> 02:06:58.755 I mean, cause it wasn't all, you know, rainbow, sunshine and applesauce. 02:06:59.355 --> 02:06:59.835 Excuse me. 02:07:01.365 --> 02:07:07.005 In fact, um, just to, to tie this in, like to tell a funny story, uh, that 02:07:07.005 --> 02:07:10.755 wasn't, wasn't so funny at the time is when we started recording, you 02:07:10.755 --> 02:07:12.224 know, I had been on so many podcasts. 02:07:12.224 --> 02:07:14.235 I was like, wow, this is going to be easy. 02:07:14.235 --> 02:07:17.714 We sit in front of each other, say, if we're going to address leadership, 02:07:17.775 --> 02:07:21.985 I'm going to go out on a, on a rant and, and you, you were going next. 02:07:21.985 --> 02:07:23.205 Then we kind of feed off each other. 02:07:23.205 --> 02:07:28.514 That way sounds easy, but it just didn't work. 02:07:28.695 --> 02:07:29.894 It didn't work that way. 02:07:29.894 --> 02:07:31.245 We sat in front of the mic. 02:07:31.394 --> 02:07:36.375 Our first, like I would say four hours of recording was utterly useless. 02:07:36.375 --> 02:07:38.655 Like we, we, we try to put things together. 02:07:38.655 --> 02:07:40.605 It just wasn't flowing it wasn't. 02:07:41.085 --> 02:07:45.275 And, and, and so that first, the half of that first day. 02:07:46.125 --> 02:07:47.475 Abject failure. 02:07:47.925 --> 02:07:52.785 Um, and we looked at each other and I got the sense inside that, 02:07:52.785 --> 02:07:56.145 you know, that premature panic, you know, like, oh shit, this might not 02:07:56.145 --> 02:07:59.385 be as easy as I think it's going to be, and this might not go anywhere. 02:07:59.385 --> 02:08:01.335 And then your mind starts running a train on you. 02:08:01.455 --> 02:08:05.175 Which of course I stopped immediately because I knew what my mind was doing. 02:08:05.655 --> 02:08:08.835 This was uncomfortable and we needed to get through it and we 02:08:08.835 --> 02:08:10.215 needed to find a way out of it. 02:08:10.215 --> 02:08:11.685 And that was also uncomfortable. 02:08:11.685 --> 02:08:12.615 And so I didn't want to do it. 02:08:13.425 --> 02:08:18.285 And so what I did is, and what we did really as a team is we sat down, we 02:08:18.285 --> 02:08:21.285 stopped the recording and we said, okay, how are we going to problem solve this? 02:08:21.855 --> 02:08:25.005 And so we had a conversation and decided to speak about something we 02:08:25.005 --> 02:08:27.495 truly, truly wanted to speak about. 02:08:28.185 --> 02:08:31.035 Like, it didn't matter if it didn't fit, if it wasn't the intro, if 02:08:31.035 --> 02:08:34.605 it wasn't chronological or any of that, we just wanted a win. 02:08:34.755 --> 02:08:35.085 Right. 02:08:35.805 --> 02:08:37.785 And so, and we said, let's go get some. 02:08:38.500 --> 02:08:42.070 Come back this afternoon, we knock it out of the park and we're on our way. 02:08:42.160 --> 02:08:42.490 Right? 02:08:42.519 --> 02:08:48.010 And so we did, we, we went, I had an app, Sean had an app, we came back together. 02:08:48.040 --> 02:08:51.940 We decided to speak about boom, this subject, which, which at all, 02:08:51.940 --> 02:08:55.480 was not chronological with respect to where we were in the process, 02:08:56.019 --> 02:08:58.990 but we knocked it out of the park, which built up our confidence. 02:08:59.050 --> 02:09:00.730 And then from there we couldn't fail. 02:09:01.269 --> 02:09:02.010 That's amazing. 02:09:02.320 --> 02:09:02.680 Yeah. 02:09:03.250 --> 02:09:08.230 But having the ability to recognize, like, this is a point here where premature panic 02:09:08.260 --> 02:09:12.970 can set in and I can let it consume me and I could have, you know, and when I 02:09:12.970 --> 02:09:17.290 say, if you are somebody like had flew somebody like a FA a photographer from 02:09:17.290 --> 02:09:19.750 Montreal to come over, she's fantastic. 02:09:20.380 --> 02:09:22.780 Tanya lamb is her name amazing photographer. 02:09:23.019 --> 02:09:24.220 Um, and she came 02:09:24.220 --> 02:09:24.940 and saw her work. 02:09:24.970 --> 02:09:25.870 Yeah, it's amazing. 02:09:25.870 --> 02:09:26.230 It is. 02:09:26.680 --> 02:09:30.460 And so she came over to document absolutely everything to make sure that 02:09:30.460 --> 02:09:32.740 we had a ton of material to follow up. 02:09:32.769 --> 02:09:36.580 Once the flood gates are open and people are wanting the information 02:09:36.580 --> 02:09:38.380 instead of, oh man, I wish we did. 02:09:39.220 --> 02:09:41.050 Yeah, we did it then. 02:09:41.050 --> 02:09:45.910 So it's so we have it's we have audio video, we have pictures, we have all 02:09:45.910 --> 02:09:48.610 kinds of stuff that we can launch into for the next little while. 02:09:49.870 --> 02:09:53.890 But for me as the person that organized this as the person that 02:09:54.010 --> 02:09:55.930 quote unquote led the project. 02:09:56.865 --> 02:10:01.875 The feeling of premature panic really hit me hard to the point where I was 02:10:01.875 --> 02:10:06.165 on the verge of like self sabotaging there, you know, and I caught myself 02:10:06.344 --> 02:10:08.955 and I was like, okay, you're going to shake yourself out of that stupor. 02:10:09.615 --> 02:10:13.065 And you are going to go for a nap and you're going to come back and 02:10:13.065 --> 02:10:16.275 you were going to reset the clocks and that's what's going to happen. 02:10:16.365 --> 02:10:19.304 And so we came back, reset the clock and everything went 02:10:19.304 --> 02:10:20.655 well and smooth after that. 02:10:21.585 --> 02:10:22.365 That is awesome. 02:10:22.394 --> 02:10:26.445 It's amazing how many times people will not even take that first step 02:10:26.804 --> 02:10:30.224 because they can't get their head wrapped around the rest of the process. 02:10:30.825 --> 02:10:32.415 How do I start this business? 02:10:32.415 --> 02:10:34.184 How do I write a book? 02:10:34.514 --> 02:10:37.365 How do I, I'm not a good author. 02:10:37.365 --> 02:10:38.835 I'm not, I'm not going to ABC. 02:10:38.955 --> 02:10:40.035 Well, what are you good at? 02:10:40.545 --> 02:10:44.505 And how can you use those things around you to help buttress sad? 02:10:44.865 --> 02:10:48.344 I know another friend of mine that I went to school with him and, uh, 02:10:48.764 --> 02:10:50.295 he wrote a book with somebody else. 02:10:50.325 --> 02:10:52.844 It was called sociable back in the day, right when social 02:10:52.844 --> 02:10:54.195 media was kind of coming up. 02:10:54.195 --> 02:10:58.424 And then he was showing, showing people how to use social media in order to propel 02:10:58.424 --> 02:11:02.355 their businesses in themselves and what it can be used for and what it can't be used. 02:11:02.355 --> 02:11:03.795 And I'm like, what the hell? 02:11:04.215 --> 02:11:04.634 You're right. 02:11:04.684 --> 02:11:07.335 The book he's like, we just sat and we talked to a tape recorder, we sent 02:11:07.335 --> 02:11:09.045 it over to India, they transcribed it. 02:11:09.045 --> 02:11:12.165 And now I'm on the lecture circuit because I'm able to talk about what I'm 02:11:12.165 --> 02:11:13.755 passionate about and what I know about. 02:11:13.755 --> 02:11:19.934 And, and those people who actually are able to. 02:11:21.315 --> 02:11:27.375 Their dreams in embark on these endeavors in the way that yourself and others do. 02:11:28.004 --> 02:11:31.995 The more that the older I get and the more I look at other businesses and people who 02:11:31.995 --> 02:11:37.754 are building things, uh, the more I see that it is basically just the process of 02:11:37.754 --> 02:11:39.644 putting one foot in front of the other. 02:11:40.155 --> 02:11:46.004 Number one, number two, the ability to pivot when they need to, uh, three, the 02:11:46.004 --> 02:11:50.504 accountability level is being able to take the, that level of accountability. 02:11:50.504 --> 02:11:52.754 It's not the fact that I can't write. 02:11:52.815 --> 02:11:54.195 I mean, I can talk in a microphone. 02:11:54.195 --> 02:11:55.634 Someone else can transcribe it. 02:11:56.144 --> 02:11:58.724 Uh, the pivot thing, I mean, that's why Instagram is around. 02:11:59.115 --> 02:12:02.115 I mean, Instagram started out as a, what was it called? 02:12:02.115 --> 02:12:03.585 Bourbon or something like this. 02:12:03.585 --> 02:12:08.235 And it was supposed to be, you could write down information or take pictures 02:12:08.235 --> 02:12:10.665 of restaurants and review few food. 02:12:10.665 --> 02:12:15.495 And they quickly pivoted from that into what they are now into 02:12:15.495 --> 02:12:17.594 a multi-million dollar industry. 02:12:18.315 --> 02:12:25.695 And then, you know, the ability to even though pivoting can be very 02:12:25.695 --> 02:12:31.125 important, the ability to persevere, and that is the one area like how 02:12:31.125 --> 02:12:33.915 you persevered, you could have easily given up and said, yeah, forget it. 02:12:34.065 --> 02:12:34.695 This sucks. 02:12:34.695 --> 02:12:39.044 We can't continue with this because we're going to have to try something else. 02:12:39.525 --> 02:12:43.335 The ability to persevere and continue plugging away. 02:12:43.544 --> 02:12:44.025 What do they say? 02:12:44.025 --> 02:12:47.144 The plugging away will we need the date will be at piker at old part. 02:12:47.684 --> 02:12:48.495 Robert Frost. 02:12:49.995 --> 02:12:55.605 The ability to continue down that path is what separates the 02:12:55.605 --> 02:12:58.485 successes from the failures. 02:12:59.295 --> 02:13:01.485 So many people would give up at that first step. 02:13:01.485 --> 02:13:03.825 And then I saw you and Sean over, where were you? 02:13:03.825 --> 02:13:05.155 You're triggered by ties. 02:13:05.305 --> 02:13:05.625 So 02:13:05.975 --> 02:13:08.535 we're drinking my ties in the 80, cause that's a real 02:13:08.535 --> 02:13:10.185 tourist destination right now. 02:13:11.265 --> 02:13:12.855 It's really hot for tourism. 02:13:13.905 --> 02:13:14.055 Yeah. 02:13:14.055 --> 02:13:17.475 We, uh, we ended up with Sean and I ended up going to Haiti, uh, working on a 02:13:17.475 --> 02:13:22.005 secure security project there and nothing super sexy for those that are, you know, 02:13:22.135 --> 02:13:27.615 have the words that were mercenaries and it wasn't what we were doing, but 02:13:27.615 --> 02:13:30.975 yeah, w you know, there's a ton of good work to be done in some of those, 02:13:31.065 --> 02:13:35.265 the more challenge areas, and that's something I'm truly passionate about. 02:13:35.325 --> 02:13:38.955 I mean, that's, you know, I'd love to go to Mali and help problem solve 02:13:38.955 --> 02:13:43.185 some of the command and control issues they have in whatever venue or, or, 02:13:43.305 --> 02:13:45.825 you know, whatever the case may be. 02:13:46.155 --> 02:13:48.825 Those are truly meaningful endeavors. 02:13:48.825 --> 02:13:53.985 You know, being on the ground in Haiti for four days was a reminder, and 02:13:53.985 --> 02:13:56.115 it's not at, you know, ethnocentric. 02:13:56.385 --> 02:13:59.595 I'm not trying to be ethnocentric in my statement here, but 02:13:59.625 --> 02:14:01.725 we do have it quite cushy. 02:14:02.025 --> 02:14:04.785 And, uh, I think that a lot of people forget that. 02:14:04.815 --> 02:14:10.665 And once you go in a, in a, in a place where things are very difficult, such 02:14:10.665 --> 02:14:16.710 as in Haiti right now at the moment, um, You know, uh, on a variety of 02:14:16.710 --> 02:14:21.900 different fronts, not just human factors, there's also other factors, 02:14:21.900 --> 02:14:23.790 you know, earthquakes and this and that. 02:14:23.790 --> 02:14:29.430 Then it's a very, very, um, you know, it's, it's, uh, it's a very 02:14:29.820 --> 02:14:35.760 difficult, um, place to, to, to live in right now at the moment. 02:14:35.850 --> 02:14:40.650 And, um, and they're doing it and, you know, everybody's up at six o'clock in 02:14:40.650 --> 02:14:44.310 the morning, doing things that kids are going to school at like six 15 or some, 02:14:44.710 --> 02:14:46.470 you know, it was just crazy to see. 02:14:47.040 --> 02:14:53.460 But, um, but Sean and I, having the opportunity to go overseas 02:14:53.460 --> 02:14:55.140 and help problem solve the issues. 02:14:55.170 --> 02:14:58.500 I am all over it, you know, I am all over it. 02:14:58.500 --> 02:15:03.240 If there's anything that needs, that needs help somewhere that falls within 02:15:03.240 --> 02:15:06.570 the sort of the realm of our expertise. 02:15:07.680 --> 02:15:07.830 I'm 02:15:07.830 --> 02:15:10.110 in what I find really impressive. 02:15:10.110 --> 02:15:13.530 Cause I'm talking about the plugging away and might've been Robert service. 02:15:13.590 --> 02:15:19.020 Robert Frost it'll come to me, but anyways, um, probably Robert service, 02:15:19.500 --> 02:15:24.510 uh, the fact that you put your head towards what it is you want to do, 02:15:24.870 --> 02:15:26.730 and then you're filling in the blanks. 02:15:27.330 --> 02:15:28.320 This is where I'd like to be. 02:15:28.620 --> 02:15:29.700 Here's where I am. 02:15:30.540 --> 02:15:33.510 And with that goal in mind, you're filling in all of those 02:15:33.510 --> 02:15:34.830 blanks in order to get there. 02:15:35.880 --> 02:15:41.430 You're taking something that you would, you don't have a roadmap right now to 02:15:41.430 --> 02:15:43.890 any of these different things, but you know what you'd like to see out of your 02:15:43.890 --> 02:15:45.660 lifestyle and you're making it happen. 02:15:45.690 --> 02:15:47.400 And that is truly inspirational. 02:15:47.940 --> 02:15:50.610 I'm really, really looking forward to your book when it comes. 02:15:50.610 --> 02:15:52.920 So maybe I can get an advanced copy. 02:15:52.920 --> 02:15:53.400 Yes or no. 02:15:55.680 --> 02:15:58.019 You might be in luck for sure. 02:15:58.440 --> 02:16:01.950 Um, is there anything else that we should be talking about before we wrap up? 02:16:03.510 --> 02:16:03.809 No. 02:16:03.809 --> 02:16:06.540 I mean, thank you very much for having me back. 02:16:06.660 --> 02:16:10.290 Uh, I, uh, you know, really insightful conversation, both of them really. 02:16:10.290 --> 02:16:12.960 I was listening to the other one this morning and I really enjoyed it. 02:16:13.710 --> 02:16:19.530 Um, you know, once the book comes out, I am, it'd be nice to get Sean and I, you 02:16:19.530 --> 02:16:24.630 know, to some airtime so that we can have, because evidently right now I'm trying 02:16:24.630 --> 02:16:26.610 to give some, without giving it all. 02:16:26.610 --> 02:16:30.510 Cause I don't want to get the carpet taken from under us, but once the book 02:16:30.540 --> 02:16:35.490 is out and the information is readily available, we could add a great chat with 02:16:35.490 --> 02:16:37.410 another, you know, outstanding human. 02:16:37.410 --> 02:16:37.500 Yeah. 02:16:37.590 --> 02:16:38.100 A hundred 02:16:38.100 --> 02:16:39.360 percent that'll happen. 02:16:39.930 --> 02:16:40.320 SAB. 02:16:40.530 --> 02:16:42.780 Thanks very much for coming on this Silvercore Podcast. 02:16:42.900 --> 02:16:56.119 Thanks for having me brother.