1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:03,800 Rem: Unhealed... whatever that is... trauma. 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:07,800 Alvia: We're having a serious topic here. 3 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:10,800 Alvia: You called it "whatever that is." 4 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:12,800 Rem: Could be eczema, right? 5 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:13,800 Alvia: I don't know, cough? 6 00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:17,920 Alvia: It's not a good enough reason to bring a 7 00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:20,800 Alvia: new life into the world. 8 00:00:20,800 --> 00:00:23,800 Alvia: The child had no choice. 9 00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:28,320 Alvia: Parents are the biggest effect on what 10 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,800 Alvia: happens to the child. 11 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,800 Alvia: What's the meme? 12 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:35,390 Alvia: Instead of generational wealth, you receive 13 00:00:35,390 --> 00:00:36,800 Alvia: generational trauma. 14 00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:03,800 Rem: Hi, I'm your host, Rem. 15 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:05,800 Alvia: And Alvia. 16 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:08,800 Rem: And welcome to our second episode. 17 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:12,800 Rem: So, we had to stop abruptly last episode. 18 00:01:12,800 --> 00:01:14,800 Rem: Where were we? I don't remember. 19 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:15,800 Rem: That was just a while ago. 20 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:16,800 Alvia: We just watched it. 21 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:18,800 Rem: We just watched it. 22 00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:24,800 Alvia: So, what we were talking about was, 23 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:27,800 Alvia: we're still in our grind years. 24 00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:29,800 Alvia: And of course, 25 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:33,010 Alvia: you think about it, if you have a child, 26 00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:34,800 Alvia: what's your runway? 27 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:40,800 Alvia: What's an acceptable age to have a child? 28 00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:43,800 Alvia: Because people are, 29 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,030 Alvia: not most, but there are people who have 30 00:01:47,030 --> 00:01:48,800 Alvia: children later than now. 31 00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:50,800 Alvia: Because of whatever reason. 32 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:52,800 Rem: Like my brother, how old are they? 33 00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:55,800 Alvia: Whatever. 34 00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:58,800 Rem: They're older than me. 35 00:01:58,800 --> 00:01:59,800 Alvia: Wow. 36 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:01,800 Rem: They'll get mad at me. 37 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:03,800 Rem: They're not watching this anyway. 38 00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:04,800 Rem: It's okay. 39 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:06,660 Alvia: They might be watching us and supporting 40 00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:06,800 Alvia: us. 41 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:07,800 Rem: One day. 42 00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:09,800 Alvia: I got lost. 43 00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:10,800 Alvia: What's the topic? 44 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:12,800 Alvia: What if you're 40, 45 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,830 Alvia: and you're still going to send your 46 00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:16,800 Alvia: child to school until 60, 47 00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:18,870 Alvia: and you're still going to support him 48 00:02:18,870 --> 00:02:19,800 Alvia: even after. 49 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:21,800 Alvia: I mean, 50 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:25,800 Alvia: except if your child is already self-sustainable, 51 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:28,800 Alvia: which is probably not the case. 52 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,800 Alvia: So, that's it. 53 00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:33,800 Alvia: That's the ending. 54 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:35,800 Rem: It's already over. 55 00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:37,800 Alvia: Told you it was already over. 56 00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:41,800 Rem: For me, I have something to add. 57 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:44,800 Rem: I'm also thinking, 58 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:48,800 Rem: can I really build, 59 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:53,800 Rem: because this is also a bit of a Woke-ism. 60 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,800 Alvia: There are so many -isms. 61 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:57,800 Rem: It's also like, 62 00:02:57,800 --> 00:02:59,800 Rem: they call it woke, right? 63 00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:04,170 Rem: But more of how society is now putting 64 00:03:04,170 --> 00:03:06,800 Rem: emphasis on trauma, 65 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:08,800 Rem: on mental health. 66 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,800 Rem: It's really a must. 67 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:12,800 Rem: They're just gaslighting. 68 00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:14,800 Rem: by calling it woke. 69 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,800 Rem: But it's necessary, guys. 70 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:17,800 Rem: But, 71 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:23,800 Rem: I'm scared that if I ever have a child, 72 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,800 Rem: I'll damage another human being. 73 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:28,800 Rem: Because, 74 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:32,800 Rem: I have a lot of baggage. 75 00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:35,800 Alvia: I'm sure. Everyone has. 76 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:36,800 Rem: Everyone has. 77 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:39,800 Rem: Admit it or not, 78 00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:40,800 Rem: there are. 79 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:44,800 Rem: And it manifests in many ways. 80 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:48,800 Rem: But, I'm aware that there are 81 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:54,800 Rem: unhealed--whatever that is--trauma. 82 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:56,800 Alvia: Our topic is serious! 83 00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:58,800 Alvia: and you just called it whatever. 84 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:00,800 Rem: Could be eczema, right? 85 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,800 Alvia: I don't know. Cough? 86 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:03,800 Alvia: You're so annoying. 87 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,800 Alvia: But seriously, 88 00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:07,800 Alvia: it's only now, 89 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:09,800 Alvia: with our generation, 90 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,800 Alvia: that we recognize these types of things. 91 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:15,310 Alvia: Actually, one of the good things with 92 00:04:15,310 --> 00:04:17,800 Alvia: this generation of parents, 93 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:21,800 Alvia: they're the most involved dads. 94 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:24,800 Rem: Oh, like my brother. 95 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:25,800 Alvia: Yes. 96 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:28,800 Alvia: And we also see my brother-in-law, 97 00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:29,800 Alvia: and friends. 98 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:31,800 Alvia: The involvement is different. 99 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,800 Alvia: Because, in our parents' time, 100 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:38,800 Alvia: dads were more focused on providing. 101 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:39,800 Rem: Yes. 102 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:40,800 Alvia: It's like that. 103 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:42,800 Alvia: It's rare to see, 104 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:44,800 Alvia: soft, 105 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:45,800 Alvia: not soft, 106 00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:46,800 Alvia: but, 107 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:49,800 Alvia: very hands-on to their children. 108 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:51,800 Rem: Nurturing. 109 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:54,800 Rem: Being an emotional, 110 00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:56,800 Rem: what do you call it? 111 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:58,800 Rem: Emotional support dog. 112 00:04:58,800 --> 00:04:59,800 Rem: Support dog? 113 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:00,800 Alvia: Wrong. 114 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:01,800 Rem: Wrong again. 115 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:02,800 Alvia: You're just out of it. 116 00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:05,240 Rem: I don't know what happened to me these 117 00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:05,800 Rem: past few days. 118 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:07,800 Rem: But, I'm running out of vocabulary. 119 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:11,800 Alvia: You just stopped for a while on the podcast. 120 00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:12,800 Rem: Yes. 121 00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:15,490 Rem: I feel like because I don't have other 122 00:05:15,490 --> 00:05:15,800 Rem: people to talk to, 123 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:17,800 Rem: besides you, 124 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,800 Rem: I'm running out of-- 125 00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:20,800 Alvia: And we're just sending memes. 126 00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:22,800 Alvia: Maybe the memes degrade the mind. 127 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:23,800 Rem: Yes. 128 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,800 Rem: We are getting less articulate. 129 00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:28,800 Alvia: That's why we need to have a podcast. 130 00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:29,800 Alvia: And I think, 131 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:33,800 Alvia: the emotional maturity, 132 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:34,800 Alvia: it's not being talked about. 133 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,800 Alvia: Even the moms. 134 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:37,800 Alvia: Right? 135 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:39,800 Alvia: They're there physically, 136 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:40,800 Alvia: but, 137 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:44,800 Alvia: they're not aware 138 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:47,800 Alvia: of the effect on the children. 139 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:49,800 Alvia: On so many things. 140 00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:50,800 Alvia: But again, 141 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:52,800 Alvia: at least the awareness is growing now. 142 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:57,800 Alvia: And it's talked about more, I guess. 143 00:05:57,800 --> 00:05:58,800 Rem: And also, 144 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:02,800 Rem: once we're aware of those things, 145 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:08,800 Rem: it's not a default that people should 146 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:09,800 Rem: have children. 147 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,800 Rem: Just because. 148 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:12,800 Rem: Because, 149 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:14,800 Rem: for me, 150 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:17,800 Rem: you really need to think about 151 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:20,800 Rem: why you want to have children. 152 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:22,800 Rem: Because there's a lot of valid reasons 153 00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:23,800 Rem: to have children. 154 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:24,800 Rem: But, 155 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,800 Rem: if you're going to have children, 156 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:29,800 Rem: but you don't know why. 157 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,800 Rem: Just because it's dictated by society. 158 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:33,800 Rem: That's a bit dangerous. 159 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:34,800 Rem: Right? 160 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:35,800 Rem: And, 161 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:40,800 Rem: if that's the reason why we're going to 162 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:41,800 Rem: have children, 163 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:44,800 Rem: just think of the effect on the child. 164 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:50,790 Rem: The foundation of how he was brought 165 00:06:50,790 --> 00:06:54,800 Rem: into this earth. 166 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:55,800 Alvia: Into the unknown. 167 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:56,800 Rem: Into the unknown. 168 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,800 Rem: Are you going to sing? 169 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,800 Alvia: This episode has no value at all. 170 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,800 Alvia: Random things pop into our minds. 171 00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:06,800 Rem: It's not solid. 172 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:10,800 Rem: It's not... 173 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:12,800 Rem: Just ticking a checkbox. 174 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:13,800 Alvia: Yeah. 175 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:15,800 Alvia: It's not, 176 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:16,800 Alvia: for us, 177 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:19,800 Alvia: it's not a good enough reason 178 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:23,800 Alvia: to bring a new life into the world. 179 00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:26,800 Alvia: The child had no choice. 180 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:27,800 Alvia: And, 181 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:28,800 Alvia: of course, 182 00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:31,800 Alvia: parents are the biggest effect 183 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:34,800 Alvia: on what happens to the child. 184 00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:35,800 Alvia: There's a meme that, 185 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,800 Alvia: instead of generational wealth, 186 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:40,800 Alvia: you're going to have generational trauma. 187 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,800 Rem: Yeah, that's just handed down. 188 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:46,800 Alvia: And even if it's just unconsciously 189 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:48,800 Alvia: manifesting, 190 00:07:48,800 --> 00:07:51,560 Alvia: you don't know how it's going to be 191 00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:52,800 Alvia: unlocked. 192 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:53,800 Rem: Yes. 193 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:54,800 Alvia: It's like that. 194 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:55,800 Alvia: But yeah, 195 00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:57,800 Alvia: what else? 196 00:07:57,800 --> 00:08:00,800 Rem: I lost my train of thought. 197 00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:02,800 Alvia: Intrusive thoughts. 198 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:03,800 Rem: Yeah. 199 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:04,800 Rem: Please forgive us. 200 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:05,800 Rem: I don't know, 201 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:07,800 Rem: maybe we have adult ADHD. 202 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:08,800 Rem: We're too... 203 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,800 Alvia: It's because of TikTok. 204 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:14,250 Rem: I feel like social media has a huge 205 00:08:14,250 --> 00:08:16,800 Rem: effect on me. 206 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:17,800 Rem: But still, 207 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:18,800 Rem: I'm still addicted to it. 208 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:21,800 Alvia: When I wake up after sleeping before him, 209 00:08:21,800 --> 00:08:23,800 Alvia: I have a huge backlog. 210 00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:25,800 Rem: Backlog meaning? 211 00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:26,800 Alvia: The memes. 212 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:28,800 Rem: I have a lot of... 213 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:29,800 Alvia: A lot of them are sent. 214 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,800 Rem: We get mad at each other 215 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:32,800 Rem: when... 216 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:35,800 Rem: You send a meme and the other doesn't react. 217 00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:36,800 Alvia: Yes. 218 00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:37,800 Rem: That's our... 219 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:39,800 Rem: That's how we... 220 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:41,800 Rem: That's our love language. 221 00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:43,800 Alvia: You just don't know how it hurts. 222 00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:46,800 Alvia: It's true. 223 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:48,800 Rem: But yeah. 224 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:52,800 Rem: People need to really assess. 225 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,800 Rem: Why? 226 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,800 Rem: Why do you want to have a child? 227 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:57,800 Alvia: And again, 228 00:08:57,800 --> 00:08:59,800 Alvia: if you really want to have a child, 229 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:00,800 Alvia: it's okay. 230 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:01,800 Rem: It's okay. 231 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:02,800 Rem: But yeah. 232 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:03,800 Rem: Think about the child. 233 00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:05,800 Rem: Think of what happens to the child. 234 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:07,800 Rem: How will you raise him? 235 00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:08,800 Rem: If... 236 00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,800 Rem: If the parents are half-hearted. 237 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:13,800 Alvia: But there are a lot of countries now 238 00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:16,800 Alvia: where birth rates are going down. 239 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:17,800 Rem: Yes. 240 00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:18,800 Alvia: There are... 241 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:19,800 Alvia: What is it? 242 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:20,800 Alvia: In Japan, 243 00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:22,800 Alvia: there are provinces that... 244 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:23,800 Rem: What? 245 00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:24,800 Alvia: For years, 246 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:25,800 Alvia: there are no children. 247 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:29,800 Alvia: So the first child is very treasured. 248 00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:31,800 Alvia: And then they're giving incentives 249 00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:33,800 Alvia: for areas like that. 250 00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:36,240 Alvia: The local government is giving 251 00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:36,800 Alvia: incentives 252 00:09:36,800 --> 00:09:38,800 Alvia: for families to settle. 253 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:40,800 Alvia: And then there's an extra incentive 254 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:41,800 Alvia: if they have children. 255 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:43,800 Alvia: That's how bad it is. 256 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:46,800 Rem: That's true because... 257 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:48,800 Rem: We mentioned it in the last episode. 258 00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:51,800 Rem: The economy is bad. 259 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:55,140 Rem: You don't have any incentive to have 260 00:09:55,140 --> 00:09:55,800 Rem: children. 261 00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:57,800 Rem: That's the thing, right? 262 00:09:57,800 --> 00:10:02,800 Rem: Society is forcing you to have children 263 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,800 Rem: or advising you to have children. 264 00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:09,800 Rem: But the state doesn't support that. 265 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,800 Rem: Especially in Japan. 266 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:14,800 Rem: Their culture is really workaholic. 267 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:15,800 Rem: Grind. 268 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:18,000 Alvia: And they don't have much support for 269 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:18,800 Alvia: child care. 270 00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:19,800 Rem: That's right. 271 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:20,800 Rem: There's no child care. 272 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:21,800 Alvia: So how... 273 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:23,800 Rem: At least here in the Philippines, 274 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:24,800 Rem: what's good here. 275 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:28,290 Rem: They say it takes a village to raise a 276 00:10:28,290 --> 00:10:28,800 Rem: child. 277 00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:29,800 Rem: Literally, here. 278 00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:30,800 Alvia: Extended families. 279 00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:34,800 Rem: Literally, your mother is there 280 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,800 Rem: to help you raise your child. 281 00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:39,800 Alvia: Like your brother. 282 00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:40,800 Rem: Yes, my brother. 283 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:41,800 Alvia: Grandparents from both sides. 284 00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:42,800 Rem: That's great. 285 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:44,800 Alvia: Strategic. 286 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:45,800 Rem: Strategic. 287 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:46,800 Rem: Which is okay, right? 288 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:53,800 Rem: So they got a place near their parents. 289 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,800 Rem: My brother is really wise. 290 00:10:56,800 --> 00:11:00,800 Rem: Sorry, I'm sharing your story. 291 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:02,800 Alvia: Turns out this podcast is not about DINKs. 292 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,800 Alvia: It's about your brother. 293 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:05,800 Rem: But it's amazing. 294 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:09,800 Rem: Their love story is interesting. 295 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:12,800 Rem: They're neighbors. 296 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:17,800 Rem: My brother's ex-girlfriends live far away. 297 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,800 Rem: Traffic was already bad then. 298 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:22,800 Rem: It's even worse now, right? 299 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:25,800 Rem: But he learned his lesson. 300 00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:26,800 Rem: He gave up on them. 301 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:33,800 Rem: So by design or by chance, 302 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:35,800 Rem: he already knew our neighbor. 303 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:37,800 Rem: We moved to their village. 304 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:39,800 Rem: And they became a couple. 305 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,800 Rem: Then eventually, they got married. 306 00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:47,800 Rem: Then they got a place near that village. 307 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:50,800 Rem: And when they're there, 308 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:54,800 Rem: their grandparents are there to help. 309 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:56,800 Alvia: Even if you have a helper, 310 00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,800 Alvia: it's still hard. 311 00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,800 Alvia: I saw my sister. 312 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:02,130 Alvia: She has a helper, a driver, and 313 00:12:02,130 --> 00:12:02,800 Alvia: everything. 314 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:05,800 Alvia: But she still needs support. 315 00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:09,800 Alvia: Maybe, on one, it's her baby. 316 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:13,800 Alvia: And then sometimes, it's for her. 317 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:15,800 Alvia: It's like for her emotional support. 318 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:18,800 Alvia: Although even your husband is there. 319 00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:21,800 Alvia: Fortunately, us siblings. 320 00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:22,800 Alvia: We're close. 321 00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:25,800 Alvia: So it's like that. 322 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:29,070 Alvia: Especially, we have a sibling who's 323 00:12:29,070 --> 00:12:29,800 Alvia: always present. 324 00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:31,800 Alvia: The whole time she's pregnant, 325 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:32,440 Alvia: when she's just giving birth and 326 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:32,800 Alvia: everything. 327 00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:34,800 Rem: You're lucky with that sibling. 328 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,800 Alvia: She's really on-call. 329 00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:38,800 Alvia: She's very flexible. 330 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:39,800 Rem: She loves that. 331 00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:40,800 Alvia: She loves that. 332 00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:41,800 Alvia: So good for her. 333 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:42,520 Alvia: She's also the one we're with most of 334 00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:42,800 Alvia: the time. 335 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:43,800 Rem: Yes. 336 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:44,800 Alvia: Because she's always around. 337 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:45,800 Rem: Always ready to be there. 338 00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,800 Alvia: Yes, her life is a bit flexible. 339 00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,800 Alvia: But yeah. 340 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:51,800 Alvia: It really takes a village. 341 00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:53,800 Alvia: Not necessarily your parents if they're 342 00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:54,800 Alvia: not available. 343 00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:56,800 Alvia: Sometimes, siblings. 344 00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:58,370 Alvia: Sometimes, we have cousins who are 345 00:12:58,370 --> 00:12:58,800 Alvia: always there. 346 00:12:58,800 --> 00:12:59,800 Rem: Yes, even cousins. 347 00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:02,800 Alvia: And then friends. 348 00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:04,800 Alvia: So it's hard. 349 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,800 Alvia: Not just on the cost, 350 00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:11,800 Alvia: but the emotional capacity needed. 351 00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:13,800 Alvia: I don't know. 352 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:15,800 Alvia: What am I even saying here. 353 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:16,800 Alvia: I don't have a child. 354 00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:17,800 Rem: That's another thing. 355 00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:22,950 Rem: I also know that I'm not fit to have a 356 00:13:22,950 --> 00:13:24,800 Rem: child. 357 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,800 Rem: For example, if Nicco asks me for help, 358 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:30,800 Rem: I mean, if it's really an emergency, 359 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:31,800 Rem: I'll be there. 360 00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,800 Rem: But I'm not the one who will offer first. 361 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:38,800 Rem: I mean, that's not my child. 362 00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:43,800 Alvia: And not just that. 363 00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:45,800 Alvia: Because our life really can't handle it. 364 00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:48,800 Alvia: My sister also asks me if I can help her. 365 00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:50,800 Alvia: Then I'll just work at their place. 366 00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:53,480 Alvia: And I tell her that if I start working, I won't 367 00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:54,800 Alvia: be able to help. 368 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:56,450 Alvia: So you literally just put me in your 369 00:13:56,450 --> 00:13:56,800 Alvia: house 370 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:58,800 Alvia: and I won't notice you. 371 00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:00,800 Rem: I know that. 372 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:02,800 Alvia: But again, if it's an emergency, of 373 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:02,800 Alvia: course. 374 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:03,800 Rem: Of course. 375 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:04,800 Rem: You'll go on leave from work. 376 00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:06,800 Rem: If it's really necessary. 377 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:09,800 Rem: But I mean, day to day, 378 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:11,800 Rem: we need to take care of the baby? 379 00:14:11,800 --> 00:14:12,800 Rem: I can't. 380 00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,990 Alvia: Just leave our nephews in the lobby with 381 00:14:15,990 --> 00:14:16,800 Alvia: their nannies. 382 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:17,800 Rem: I really can't. 383 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:21,800 Rem: Like we said, I don't carry babies. 384 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:22,800 Alvia: He really can't. 385 00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:23,800 Rem: I really can't. 386 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,800 Alvia: He'll pay attention to a child when he's two-years-old already. 387 00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:28,800 Alvia: When the child is not fragile anymore. 388 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:29,800 Rem: Despite that. 389 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:36,350 Rem: I'll just play with a child if he comes 390 00:14:36,350 --> 00:14:36,800 Rem: to me. 391 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:39,800 Rem: I won't initiate. 392 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:42,800 Rem: I'll just wave or smile at him. 393 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:46,800 Rem: I'll just be like that. 394 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:48,800 Rem: And a lot of people get offended. 395 00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:51,580 Rem: If you do that, you're not providing their 396 00:14:51,580 --> 00:14:52,800 Rem: child with attention. 397 00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:53,800 Alvia: You're not competing to hold the child. 398 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:54,800 Rem: You're not competing. 399 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:55,800 Rem: Why? 400 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,800 Rem: I mean, it's cute. 401 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:00,800 Rem: Especially our nieces. 402 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:06,800 Rem: I love our niece and nephew. 403 00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:09,220 Alvia: I thought you weren't going to include 404 00:15:09,220 --> 00:15:09,800 Alvia: our nephew. 405 00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:10,800 Rem: I was a bit confused. 406 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,800 Rem: What's the male version of niece? 407 00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:14,800 Alvia: Because in Tagalog, it's just "pamangkin." 408 00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:17,800 Rem: I don't know why spoke in English. 409 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:21,800 Alvia: I also don't seek to hold the child. 410 00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:22,800 Alvia: Especially when it's a nephew. 411 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:25,800 Alvia: I know I see him every now and then. 412 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,800 Alvia: So I won't compete to hold the child. 413 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:28,800 Alvia: But they hand them to me. 414 00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:32,570 Alvia: Because when they see that you don't mind 415 00:15:32,570 --> 00:15:33,800 Alvia: not holding the baby 416 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,800 Alvia: they hand it to me. 417 00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,800 Rem: I really don't understand that. 418 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:41,800 Rem: Because I'm okay with it. 419 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:43,800 Alvia: We're that weird couple. 420 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:45,800 Rem: I'm okay with it. 421 00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:47,800 Rem: I don't get it. 422 00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:48,800 Rem: Why do other people get offended 423 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:50,800 Rem: when you don't want to be a part of that? 424 00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:51,800 Rem: I mean... 425 00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:52,800 Alvia: Because it's weird. 426 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:54,800 Alvia: Usually, it's... 427 00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:56,800 Alvia: It's like they're really competing. 428 00:15:56,800 --> 00:15:57,800 Rem: I find babies cute. 429 00:15:57,800 --> 00:15:58,800 Rem: But not enough to... 430 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,800 Rem: pinch their skin. 431 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:04,800 Rem: Especially if it's a newborn. 432 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:06,800 Alvia: That's scary. 433 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:11,800 Rem: And the vaccine isn't complete yet. 434 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:14,800 Rem: I won't really hold it. 435 00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:16,800 Rem: I might drop it and break it. 436 00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:17,800 Alvia: Break it? 437 00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:20,800 Alvia: You're really hopeless. 438 00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:21,800 Rem: No, really. 439 00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:23,800 Rem: That's how I am. 440 00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,800 Rem: And I won't... 441 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,800 Alvia: Baby hater. 442 00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:30,800 Rem: We have a friend who's our only child. 443 00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:31,800 Rem: Our only child? 444 00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:32,800 Alvia: Our only child. 445 00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:33,800 Rem: Our only friend. 446 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:35,800 Alvia: She makes babies cry. 447 00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:36,800 Rem: She makes babies cry. 448 00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:37,800 Rem: She's a bully. 449 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:40,800 Rem: Let's call her out when she's here. 450 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,800 Alvia: You always see her here. 451 00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:44,800 Alvia: She's our only friend. 452 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:46,800 Alvia: Sorry to our other friends. 453 00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,480 Rem: She's our only friend because we're like 454 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:48,800 Rem: this. 455 00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,800 Alvia: We're more damaged. 456 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:53,800 Rem: Guys, I admit I'm a mean person. 457 00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:55,800 Rem: I don't hide it. 458 00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:58,800 Rem: I'm telling you, I don't hold a child. 459 00:16:58,800 --> 00:16:59,800 Rem: Why are you forcing me? 460 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:01,800 Alvia: But other people... 461 00:17:01,800 --> 00:17:05,800 Alvia: There's a reverse psychology. 462 00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:06,800 Rem: Oh, yeah. 463 00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,800 Alvia: That's why people think... 464 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,500 Alvia: You know, you're just trying to be 465 00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:10,800 Alvia: cute. 466 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:12,800 Alvia: Because it's not usual. 467 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:15,470 Alvia: That's what happened to me when my nephew 468 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:17,800 Alvia: was just a baby. 469 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:19,800 Alvia: I was like, "Why should I get into that? 470 00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,800 Alvia: I'll see her next month." 471 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:22,800 Alvia: Something like that. 472 00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:23,800 Alvia: So I was just chilling. 473 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,370 Alvia: Then they were like, "Oh, give it your 474 00:17:25,370 --> 00:17:25,800 Alvia: Ate." 475 00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:27,800 Alvia: See, my family name is Ate. 476 00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:30,800 Alvia: "Have Ate carry her." 477 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,780 Alvia: I was like, "Guys, you know I know how to hold a 478 00:17:33,780 --> 00:17:34,800 Alvia: baby, right?" 479 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:37,800 Alvia: Why is there a test? 480 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:39,440 Rem: It's like they're the ones deciding for 481 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:39,800 Rem: you. 482 00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:41,800 Rem: "Hold this." I don't want to. 483 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:43,800 Alvia: What if it's a puppy? 484 00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:44,800 Alvia: You'll grab it! 485 00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:46,800 Rem: It still depends on me. 486 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,800 Alvia: If the dog is cute, you grab it from everyone else. 487 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,800 Rem: Yeah, but I won't carry it. 488 00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:52,800 Alvia: What about the small one? 489 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:53,800 Rem: Who's that? 490 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:55,800 Alvia: The terrier. 491 00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:57,800 Rem: Tina? 492 00:17:57,800 --> 00:17:58,800 Alvia: Yeah. 493 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:02,800 Rem: I still am unsure of it 494 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:03,800 Rem: I don't want to. 495 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:05,800 Rem: break anything. 496 00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:06,800 Rem: But... 497 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:07,800 Alvia: Clumsy AF 498 00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:09,800 Rem: One question. 499 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:15,910 Rem: Because we don't want to have biological 500 00:18:15,910 --> 00:18:16,800 Rem: children. 501 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:18,800 Rem: Biological. 502 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,800 Rem: That's the keyword. 503 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:27,800 Rem: But are we open to adopting babies? 504 00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:29,800 Rem: But before you answer that, 505 00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:31,800 Rem: let's leave our audience on a cliffhanger again. 506 00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:37,800 Rem: And we will discuss that next episode. 507 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:40,430 Rem: Thank you for watching and tuning in to 508 00:18:40,430 --> 00:18:43,800 Rem: another episode of the DINKWAP Show. 509 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:45,800 Rem: And yeah, see you next episode. 510 00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:47,800 Alvia: Bye! 511 00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:51,800 You were listening to the DINKWAP Show. 512 00:18:51,800 --> 00:19:19,800 [outro music]