1 01:00:00,125 --> 01:00:02,750 Good morning and 2 01:00:02,750 --> 01:00:04,583 welcome to Morning Serial. 3 01:00:08,666 --> 01:00:09,791 Okay, good morning 4 01:00:09,791 --> 01:00:11,500 and welcome to Thursday, 5 01:00:12,166 --> 01:00:12,958 affectionately known 6 01:00:12,958 --> 01:00:14,833 around here as Friday Eve. 7 01:00:15,333 --> 01:00:17,208 Well, today people and some of you 8 01:00:17,208 --> 01:00:19,041 can appreciate this more than others. 9 01:00:19,458 --> 01:00:22,125 Today is National Potty Dance Day, 10 01:00:22,583 --> 01:00:24,791 honoring that universal wiggle dance 11 01:00:24,791 --> 01:00:26,333 that we've all done when the bathroom 12 01:00:26,333 --> 01:00:28,500 was just a little too far away. 13 01:00:28,833 --> 01:00:30,416 And just reminding us 14 01:00:30,416 --> 01:00:31,291 that we're all human 15 01:00:31,708 --> 01:00:34,125 and sometimes urgently so. 16 01:00:34,833 --> 01:00:36,708 Well, the answer to yesterday's trivia 17 01:00:36,708 --> 01:00:38,250 question, apartheid. 18 01:00:38,958 --> 01:00:39,916 The term for racial 19 01:00:39,916 --> 01:00:41,458 separation in South Africa 20 01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:42,875 was apartheid. 21 01:00:43,666 --> 01:00:44,916 And now the essential 22 01:00:44,916 --> 01:00:46,625 vitamins in your morning cereal, 23 01:00:47,041 --> 01:00:48,208 today's quote is from 24 01:00:48,208 --> 01:00:50,500 birthday girl turning 52 today, 25 01:00:51,250 --> 01:00:52,708 Eva Mendez, who said, quote, 26 01:00:53,000 --> 01:00:54,541 "I don't need to be perfect, 27 01:00:54,833 --> 01:00:57,000 "I just need to be present," end quote. 28 01:00:57,500 --> 01:00:59,125 All right, your morning decode, 29 01:00:59,791 --> 01:01:01,958 release that pressure to be flawless 30 01:01:02,500 --> 01:01:05,458 and instead focus on being fully engaged 31 01:01:05,666 --> 01:01:08,416 and fully available and consistent in 32 01:01:08,416 --> 01:01:09,708 your present moment. 33 01:01:10,208 --> 01:01:11,500 All right, well, let's 34 01:01:11,500 --> 01:01:12,791 hear from the experts now. 35 01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:15,083 It is time to pour in some let them 36 01:01:15,083 --> 01:01:17,416 theory by Mel Robbins. 37 01:01:17,416 --> 01:01:18,208 And you're asking, what? 38 01:01:18,625 --> 01:01:19,958 I thought we finished the book yesterday. 39 01:01:20,458 --> 01:01:21,875 We did, we finished the chapters, 40 01:01:22,083 --> 01:01:24,208 but we are in the appendix now 41 01:01:24,583 --> 01:01:25,125 where there's some 42 01:01:25,125 --> 01:01:26,458 still really good advice. 43 01:01:27,041 --> 01:01:28,291 This one is how to 44 01:01:28,291 --> 01:01:30,791 apply let them to parenting. 45 01:01:31,208 --> 01:01:32,666 All right, so parents listen up. 46 01:01:33,125 --> 01:01:34,916 Mel is acknowledging that parenting 47 01:01:34,916 --> 01:01:36,416 is where control issues 48 01:01:36,416 --> 01:01:38,458 go to lift weights, okay? 49 01:01:38,916 --> 01:01:40,708 You care deeply, you want 50 01:01:40,708 --> 01:01:42,375 outcomes, you want safety, 51 01:01:42,375 --> 01:01:44,666 but she gently challenges that instinct. 52 01:01:45,125 --> 01:01:46,250 She says, quote, "Your 53 01:01:46,250 --> 01:01:49,000 child's life is theirs to live," 54 01:01:49,000 --> 01:01:49,500 end quote. 55 01:01:50,083 --> 01:01:51,583 Now that can feel both 56 01:01:51,583 --> 01:01:53,875 freeing and real terrifying. 57 01:01:54,541 --> 01:01:57,000 The let them principle in parenting means 58 01:01:57,125 --> 01:01:58,708 allowing children to 59 01:01:58,708 --> 01:02:00,000 experience discomfort, 60 01:02:00,583 --> 01:02:01,458 disappointment and 61 01:02:01,458 --> 01:02:04,041 consequences, age appropriate ones, 62 01:02:04,041 --> 01:02:05,333 of course, but without 63 01:02:05,333 --> 01:02:07,833 rushing in to fix everything, right? 64 01:02:08,083 --> 01:02:09,583 Mel explains that rescuing 65 01:02:09,583 --> 01:02:11,500 too quickly teaches dependence, 66 01:02:11,833 --> 01:02:13,208 not resilience, quote, 67 01:02:13,791 --> 01:02:15,458 "Confidence is built through experience, 68 01:02:15,666 --> 01:02:16,791 not protection," end quote. 69 01:02:17,208 --> 01:02:18,750 And she encourages parents 70 01:02:18,750 --> 01:02:20,375 to pause before intervening, 71 01:02:20,666 --> 01:02:22,250 ask, "Is this unsafe 72 01:02:22,250 --> 01:02:24,083 or just uncomfortable?" 73 01:02:24,666 --> 01:02:26,541 There's also a shift in identity here. 74 01:02:26,958 --> 01:02:27,958 Instead of being the 75 01:02:27,958 --> 01:02:29,666 architect of your child's future, 76 01:02:30,083 --> 01:02:32,458 you become the guide, the support, 77 01:02:32,958 --> 01:02:34,375 the steady presence there. 78 01:02:34,583 --> 01:02:36,041 She adds, quote, "Your job 79 01:02:36,041 --> 01:02:37,791 is not to control the path, 80 01:02:38,250 --> 01:02:40,625 it's to walk besides them," end quote. 81 01:02:41,166 --> 01:02:42,458 So this section is 82 01:02:42,458 --> 01:02:44,833 emphasizing modeling over managing. 83 01:02:45,416 --> 01:02:47,375 Children learn how to regulate emotions 84 01:02:47,375 --> 01:02:49,791 by watching you regulate yours. 85 01:02:50,208 --> 01:02:51,291 They learn boundaries by 86 01:02:51,291 --> 01:02:53,625 watching you honor yours, right? 87 01:02:54,000 --> 01:02:54,875 So the let them 88 01:02:54,875 --> 01:02:56,875 approach doesn't mean neglect, 89 01:02:56,875 --> 01:03:00,375 it means trust, trust that your child 90 01:03:00,375 --> 01:03:02,125 can navigate social hiccups, 91 01:03:02,833 --> 01:03:05,000 trust that they can solve small problems, 92 01:03:05,375 --> 01:03:06,083 trust that they can 93 01:03:06,083 --> 01:03:07,541 recover from them as well, 94 01:03:07,958 --> 01:03:09,208 and trust that you've 95 01:03:09,208 --> 01:03:11,625 equipped them more than you realize. 96 01:03:12,041 --> 01:03:13,041 All right, here it is. 97 01:03:13,291 --> 01:03:14,500 Your Thursday takeaway 98 01:03:14,500 --> 01:03:16,541 parents is guide your children, 99 01:03:16,958 --> 01:03:18,458 don't control them, and 100 01:03:18,458 --> 01:03:20,500 let growth do its quiet work. 101 01:03:21,458 --> 01:03:23,083 So today, and if you're 102 01:03:23,083 --> 01:03:24,000 doing the potty dance, 103 01:03:24,000 --> 01:03:25,583 we are almost done, hang in there. 104 01:03:26,041 --> 01:03:28,000 Today, attack your Thursday 105 01:03:28,000 --> 01:03:30,083 with presence over perfection. 106 01:03:30,541 --> 01:03:32,041 All right, now the prize from 107 01:03:32,041 --> 01:03:33,416 the bottom of the cereal box, 108 01:03:33,416 --> 01:03:34,125 the morning cereal 109 01:03:34,125 --> 01:03:35,458 trivia question of the day. 110 01:03:36,000 --> 01:03:36,416 Here it is. 111 01:03:37,000 --> 01:03:38,500 What disorder is caused 112 01:03:38,500 --> 01:03:40,666 by an extra chromosome 21? 113 01:03:41,458 --> 01:03:43,250 All right, thanks for listening to 114 01:03:43,250 --> 01:03:44,250 morning cereal today. 115 01:03:44,250 --> 01:03:45,458 We will see you back here tomorrow 116 01:03:45,708 --> 01:03:46,958 for the answer to the trivia question 117 01:03:47,458 --> 01:03:49,333 and for more sugar for your soul. 118 01:03:49,583 --> 01:03:52,500 And until then, have a fantastic day. 119 01:03:53,708 --> 01:03:55,291 Don't forget to follow and subscribe 120 01:03:55,291 --> 01:03:56,791 to the morning cereal podcast 121 01:03:57,000 --> 01:03:58,750 on the One Life Live It channel. 122 01:03:59,250 --> 01:04:00,958 You can find more episodes and videos 123 01:04:00,958 --> 01:04:01,958 by visiting our YouTube 124 01:04:01,958 --> 01:04:03,250 channel and the website 125 01:04:03,416 --> 01:04:06,458 at seaningless and at seaningless.com, 126 01:04:06,458 --> 01:04:07,375 where you can also 127 01:04:07,375 --> 01:04:08,791 follow our other podcast, 128 01:04:09,125 --> 01:04:10,416 the Mr. and Mrs. English podcast 129 01:04:10,875 --> 01:04:12,041 and the Life Happens podcast. 130 01:04:12,791 --> 01:04:13,833 In these other podcasts, 131 01:04:14,166 --> 01:04:15,916 we'll dive deeper into everyday issues, 132 01:04:16,208 --> 01:04:16,958 self-improvement and 133 01:04:16,958 --> 01:04:18,541 wellbeing, business and finance, 134 01:04:19,000 --> 01:04:20,708 and we welcome special guests too. 135 01:04:21,208 --> 01:04:21,958 So join us. 136 01:04:21,958 --> 01:04:23,291 It'll be a good time, I promise. 137 01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:24,875 Thanks again for listening. 138 01:04:25,041 --> 01:04:26,625 Have a fantastic day and 139 01:04:26,625 --> 01:04:27,166 we'll see you tomorrow.