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Wil closes out Season 2 with Rebecca Calder, Ph. D., a Navy veteran, Top Gun graduate, researcher, military spouse, and mom raising teenagers. Together they explore what it means to belong when you're carrying multiple identities, and when perfectionism keeps trying to convince you that you have to earn your worth.
Becky shares how her view of belonging evolved from performance-based, proving you deserve a seat at the table, to values-based belonging rooted in service, family, faith, and excellence. She also tells a vivid story from early motherhood, watching Top Gun grad flights overhead while holding her Top Gun patch covered in her baby's vomit, as a turning point that helped her see she's more than any single role.
The conversation also highlights Becky's doctoral work on psychological capital and burnout. She breaks down the HERO framework: Hope, Efficacy, Resilience, and Optimism; and explains how these internal resources can be developed in leaders and shared across teams to build healthier, more human workplaces.
In This Episode, You'll Hear
Becky shares how her view of belonging evolved from performance-based, proving you deserve a seat at the table, to values-based belonging rooted in service, family, faith, and excellence. She also tells a vivid story from early motherhood, watching Top Gun grad flights overhead while holding her Top Gun patch covered in her baby's vomit, as a turning point that helped her see she's more than any single role.
The conversation also highlights Becky's doctoral work on psychological capital and burnout. She breaks down the HERO framework: Hope, Efficacy, Resilience, and Optimism; and explains how these internal resources can be developed in leaders and shared across teams to build healthier, more human workplaces.
In This Episode, You'll Hear
- Why belonging can get confused with performance and how that feeds perfectionism
- What it was like being the first female pilot to graduate from Top Gun and why she felt she truly belonged there
- The "Top Gun patch covered in vomit" moment, and what it revealed about identity, transition, and grace
- Leadership as creating environments where people get support not criticism or unrealistic expectations
- Psychological capital: what it is, why it matters, and how it connects to burnout
- The HERO framework: Hope, Efficacy, Resilience, Optimism, and how leaders can build these capacities in others
- Resilience as "ordinary magic" and why incremental gains matter
- What's next for Becky: speaking, service, and the possibility of a book
Memorable Moments
- Becky reframes belonging as knowing your values and creating space for others to live theirs.
- She describes Top Gun as one of the first places she felt full belonging, because of shared commitment to excellence and growth.
- The motherhood story lands as a powerful reminder; you can be accomplished and still be in a hard season.
Closing Advice
Becky's biggest takeaway for listeners; never lose hope. Keep going. Resilience comes at a cost, but understanding what real resilience looks like can save you.
Movie + Music (Walk-up Moment)
Movie title: Called to Serve: A Story of Hope and Resilience
Who plays Becky: Charlize Theron
Theme song: "Girl on Fire" by Alicia Keys
Closing Vibe
A strong Season 2 finale that reminds us belonging isn't something you earn by being perfect. It's something you build from the inside out through values, service, and the courage to be human.
Becky's biggest takeaway for listeners; never lose hope. Keep going. Resilience comes at a cost, but understanding what real resilience looks like can save you.
Movie + Music (Walk-up Moment)
Movie title: Called to Serve: A Story of Hope and Resilience
Who plays Becky: Charlize Theron
Theme song: "Girl on Fire" by Alicia Keys
Closing Vibe
A strong Season 2 finale that reminds us belonging isn't something you earn by being perfect. It's something you build from the inside out through values, service, and the courage to be human.
Creators and Guests
What is At-homish?
Join Wil Johnson, Chief Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Officer for Snohomish County, as he helps make you feel At-homish. Whether you are in your home town or discovering a new one, there are ways we can help everyone belong and feel at-home. Wil breaks down the different perspectives and strategies on how to make everyone in your community feel like they belong. Come on in and make yourself At-homish.