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The real Christmas is the capitalism we made along the way.
Creators & Guests
What is Popcorn & Plot Holes?
Movies are fun! Movies are awesome! But movies can sometimes be very, very weird... or just plain terrible. In this intersection of fun, awesome, weird and terrible is where Matt, Luciano, Chris and Spencer live and thrive. They'll be watching the latest FACTS (Fantasy, Action, Comic, Thriller, Sci-Fi) movies available on streaming services and sharing their equally awesome, fun, weird and terrible thoughts on them. Welcome to Popcorn & Plot Holes!
Matt (00:00.757)
Hello and welcome back to plot holes and popcorn. Did I get that right? Popcorn and plot holes? Damn it.
Spencer (00:05.258)
Nope. Hehehehehehe. Hehehehehehehehe.
Luciano (00:05.586)
Popcorn and plot holes. You were on a roll in the last few episodes and now you fucked it up. C-C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
Matt (00:10.205)
And you know, we got it. We got it. We can't We can't I can't get it every episode that'll be confusing to the people listening to the podcast Can't have that equally confusing for the podcast as we are in the month of December and we've decided to switch things up slightly by Throwing a little bit of a wrench into each Show we do we're not following the same format of watching movies in the facts arena. Something could have changed
Spencer (00:13.806)
Hehehehehehe
Spencer (00:17.654)
Well...
Matt (00:36.169)
And this week we changed by not selecting a facts movie, so it's important to probably remind you what facts movies are. Fantasy, actually this might be a fantasy movie, but we'll get there. Action, there's no action in this movie. Comics, and you guys probably put comedy in there, don't worry there's no comedy in this movie either. Not a problem. Thriller, it isn't, but we'll see what we can do. And then science fiction, I mean, no.
Luciano (00:45.972)
Yeah, I was gonna say.
Spencer (00:46.745)
Hehehehe
Spencer (00:55.996)
It doesn't fit in there either.
Luciano (00:58.883)
Yeah.
Spencer (01:00.91)
Maybe.
Luciano (01:05.362)
It's fiction.
Matt (01:05.373)
I can't. It's fiction. It's fantasy, but I'm not giving you science fiction. With all that lead up, obviously I should tell you what the movie is. It is called I Believe in Santa Claus. It is a movie.
Spencer (01:05.43)
No, you can take the fiction part.
Spencer (01:17.766)
No wait, you may be asking yourself, I haven't heard of this film. What is this, I believe in Santa Claus. Why don't you tell them that.
Luciano (01:23.042)
Hehehe
Spencer (01:29.454)
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
Matt (01:29.505)
I don't want to, but I will. I Believe in Santa is the Netflix film, filmed for Netflix. It is a, we'll call it a riff. I think that's the word I can use, a riff on homework films. And it is a 2022, it's the newest one I could find, unfortunately for you all, movie. I'm gonna say that this is a Paxton Booth vehicle. Paxton Booth is Freckles in the movie.
Luciano (01:55.638)
Sure!
Spencer (01:56.848)
Who's that? Okay, okay.
Matt (02:00.461)
Um, you... I mean, if you've seen this movie and you don't watch all these movies, the most recognizable person might be Violet McGraw. She was in, uh, Megan most recently. Um...
Spencer (02:12.062)
No, also the Lisa's boss was played by... Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Luciano (02:16.undefined)
Yeah.
Matt (02:16.281)
Yeah, well, I was getting to Matthew Glaive, and you've probably seen him in a number of other things. Wedding Singer, Big George Foreman.
Luciano (02:27.099)
He's one of those characters that go, oh, that guy, but you never know his name or what he did. Yeah.
Spencer (02:30.552)
Oh yeah!
Matt (02:31.701)
He's a character actor for sure. So you know his face. But he's probably, yeah, yeah. So that's his biggest role, but he's probably, that's probably all you really wanna talk about. And there's also Missy Pyle, who I've seen in things, but I don't know why I've seen her and stuff.
Spencer (02:35.126)
He's the villain in Wedding Crashers.
Luciano (02:37.963)
Yeah, that's true.
Spencer (02:48.647)
No idea who that is or who she played.
Matt (02:50.369)
She sang some of the Christmas carols. Yeah.
Luciano (02:53.647)
Oh yeah, she was one of the carolers. Yeah. Yeah, not carolers the single long woman the one that was singing. Yeah, this is true
Matt (03:00.309)
Sorry, yes, this right that not the hip hop carolers, but the sing-along the sing-along woman
Luciano (03:03.607)
Oh boy. Oh boy. Yeah.
Spencer (03:07.742)
The Pentatonix rip-off band.
Matt (03:10.297)
Yeah, yeah, let's just go with that.
Luciano (03:10.782)
Yeah, that was the quadratonics because there were four. No tetratonics.
Spencer (03:13.939)
Yeah, yeah.
Matt (03:17.405)
I think she's also just, I'm looking through her IMDB and it's like five episodes of this, one episode of that, 11 episodes of this, another character actor, but you may recognize her face. Anyways, that's not important. The important part is, is Pax and Booth plays a major role in this movie as a kid who throws snowballs and is an antagonist to the main hero. We'll use that term previously.
Luciano (03:22.111)
Yeah.
100%
Luciano (03:37.891)
Mmm, it remains to be seen.
Matt (03:41.461)
Fair enough. Um, one of the piece of note I should cover four minutes into the podcast You probably haven't heard Chris Miller's voice on this podcast. He is in parts unknown. He is not in Toronto I don't know where he is. We don't he told us but we're not gonna disclose. It's a mystery to you all He will not be here joining us yours Yeah, he doesn't believe in Christmas. No, that's true Yeah So it'll just be the three of us. So the podcast is gonna be definitely really just
Luciano (03:55.554)
He's in pee-
Spencer (03:57.954)
He doesn't believe in grismus. He refused.
Luciano (04:00.638)
Oh, that's why, yeah.
Spencer (04:08.254)
at least 25% better. Just throwing that number out there.
Matt (04:11.36)
Wow.
Luciano (04:11.673)
Wow!
Matt (04:14.277)
Okay, you know, we'll just leave it there. I'm not going to say anything else. So let's talk about, I believe in Santa. Normally, while we go over the standard question, we'll see what we have with it. I would like to know what your favorite part about, I believe in Santa was.
Luciano (04:29.334)
I will tell you, my favorite part about this movie was the soundtrack because they played a lot of Tchaikovsky and I like Tchaikovsky. That's the best part of this movie. I yield my time.
Spencer (04:43.057)
Who made this happen? Who picked this movie? I wasn't, I don't remember being in for this. Yeah, this is what happens when I'm not involved.
Luciano (04:47.018)
You weren't, we told you about this, you weren't there.
Luciano (04:53.13)
Yeah, when you are involved, we get things like Morpheus, so shut the fuck up. No, don't say it, no. There's no way.
Matt (04:57.641)
Yeah, do you think that's better?
Spencer (05:00.031)
Yes.
Matt (05:02.933)
Hey, first of all, wait until the end. We're not gonna ruin that for people. That's a spoiler. End of the podcast. You don't know.
Spencer (05:04.866)
So, okay, we're gonna get there. Maybe we loved it. Whoever decided, fuck you. Secondly, my favorite part of the movie was a very specific scene. There is a scene, we're gonna have to describe the scenes because no one's seen this movie and no one will and I'm lucky and I'm envious. There's a scene where, spoiler alert, where they're supposed to go sledding, sleigh riding.
Matt (05:12.769)
Santa decided.
Luciano (05:25.334)
Hahaha!
Spencer (05:34.106)
Romantic sleigh ride, but they have a big it's a romantic comedy kind of story and they have a big fight before the sleigh ride and he and she breaks up with him and It's actually like a great comedic cut if it wasn't supposed to be serious where it hard cuts to him alone on the sleigh ride He still went on the ride Click freezing cold
Luciano (05:48.067)
Yeah. Like, like huddling against the cold, pouting and pouting. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Matt (05:51.58)
Yes.
Matt (05:56.689)
And they couldn't even be bothered to put him on a real sled. It's clearly just like they're running film behind him on a fake sled. Like it makes it that much sadder and perfect.
Luciano (06:03.838)
Yeah.
Spencer (06:05.33)
Yeah, it's just like I was just like me my way we're both like he still went on the ride like alone That was a my favorite part of the movie
Luciano (06:10.565)
Yeah, yeah
Luciano (06:15.671)
What was yours, man?
Matt (06:17.177)
Mine is similar. I think my favorite part of the movie is when they have like a little bit of a tiff, but not really when he's at their house or he's at her house and they're making cookies. And then he just leaves but he puts her on the couch like tucks her in and just walks out the fucking door doesn't say anything to her doesn't mention he's leaving and like he put they put her kid bed. He just drove back into downtown Denver. And it's just like
Spencer (06:40.418)
Hehehehe
Matt (06:47.969)
You're like 40 year old adults and you can't even sleep on her couch. Like you have to go home at night like every night. And she's like, wow, what a.
Luciano (06:50.646)
Hahaha
Spencer (06:50.807)
Hehehe
Luciano (06:57.206)
He has to sleep with his Santa Blankie, otherwise he can't sleep.
Spencer (07:02.475)
Well, should we lay out the premise of the film?
Matt (07:04.737)
Okay, yeah, we better cuz you're right. No one's gonna watch this. Okay, so I believe in Santa Claus we have our main characters we have Lisa a divorce mother of one and we have Tom a Single man up to this point. He does not reveal any of his past history that we're gonna talk about nothing
Spencer (07:07.379)
Yeah, we must.
Spencer (07:21.894)
at all.
Luciano (07:23.138)
Yeah, concerning.
Matt (07:26.033)
Lisa, very concerning, but that's Lisa's problem, not ours. Lisa does not like Christmas. We find this out very early on. Loves 4th of July, hates Christmas. That 4th of July thing I said, forget about it. Not important whatsoever. Just forget about it. Doesn't matter again. Tom is a lawyer. Somehow he finds her kid.
Spencer (07:26.07)
Concerning lack of history.
Luciano (07:27.924)
Yeah.
Hahaha!
Luciano (07:40.683)
Not important whatsoever. Literally two minutes into the movie, it doesn't matter anymore.
Spencer (07:41.382)
Yeah. Delete it.
Luciano (07:51.458)
somehow.
Matt (07:52.885)
They have a little meet cute at a 4th of July party. They know a secret point where fireworks go off and they're into dating. And we find out dating for like six months, I think. And Lisa is talking to her best friend who obviously is a black woman, because you know, diversity, gotta hit those quotas. And she's all like, what's wrong with Tom? What's his thing? Well, Tom's thing is that Tom loves Santa Claus.
Spencer (08:00.622)
Boom. Dating for months.
Yeah.
Luciano (08:05.611)
Yeah.
Luciano (08:12.182)
Has to be.
Matt (08:22.225)
And it starts off with like, oh, he really likes Christmas. That's interesting. At one point in the movie, he gives an impassioned speech on why Santa is actually real. And I'm not saying like, oh, you know, you gotta have the joy and the whimsy of Christmas for the kids. No, he fucking tries to use science and logic to tell you why Santa's actually real. He gaslights the fuck. That's fair, it's not science. Wait, he.
Spencer (08:24.546)
He loves Christmas.
Luciano (08:26.006)
He absolutely adores Christmas.
Luciano (08:42.406)
Well, not science. He... yeah.
Spencer (08:42.428)
I think you're undercutting it.
Spencer (08:47.318)
He's a 40 plus year old man, and he's telling this woman that he, at a dinner party, I didn't know this when I watched the movie, that he 100% believes in Santa Claus as a real entity, an all powerful being, and.
Luciano (08:50.239)
Yeah.
Luciano (09:04.542)
And he thinks it is the more logical position to believe in a magic man that flies around with flying reindeer and visits every single house in the world, then the fact that maybe.
Spencer (09:18.91)
Because time cuz he because Santa's on a different time Remember he explained. That's our look at the different. He follows different temporal rules
Luciano (09:23.082)
Don't, don't, don't lie. We don't have time for this. But he thinks, he thinks that an old man that flies around in a sled with flying reindeer that is in a different sort of time rule setup of some sort is a more tenable position that, no, a lot of kids just believe that presents are magic. And he actually actively believes this and he tries to defend it.
Matt (09:25.536)
Heheheheh!
Spencer (09:50.498)
That's the premise.
Matt (09:51.777)
Right. Don't spend too much time on this because we have to get- That's like a third of the movie at best. Anyways, so it turns out Lisa hates Christmas a lot. And they decide to- somehow they got to this idea where they're gonna spend every single day from now till Christmas together doing Christmas things. That was a compromise.
Luciano (09:51.798)
with logic and facts.
Luciano (09:57.853)
Hahaha
Spencer (10:08.708)
That was the compromise.
Luciano (10:10.972)
Yeah, starting in December 1st, every day from December 1st to Christmas, they were going to spend together doing Christmasy things, even though she fucking hates it.
Matt (10:14.185)
The next day.
Spencer (10:22.67)
And the logic was that way she gets to see him every day. Like that was how her friend, how sharing sold her on the idea. She said, sure, you'll be doing things you hate, but you'll be with a man. And you will therefore, therefore we'll have value. No, that's like literally the premise.
Luciano (10:26.015)
Yeah.
Matt (10:26.624)
Yes.
Sharon.
Luciano (10:30.302)
Yeah.
Luciano (10:35.478)
But with the person you like. Oh my God. Oh no, in-cell Spencer's here again. I know.
Matt (10:38.269)
Yep, now. Here you go. Ha ha ha.
Matt (10:48.533)
I think Intel Spencer wrote this movie if I'm honest.
Spencer (10:54.262)
Yes, I may have had a small story credit, but moving on. After they go on many days of Christmas, centric dates every day, all day, she tries to calmly decline going to the sleigh ride after doing Christmas things for what, a week straight?
Matt (11:21.181)
Like 20 days. Yeah.
Spencer (11:22.346)
Like 20 days of Christmas stuff.
Luciano (11:22.5)
And after being told that her grown ass adult boyfriend actively believes in Christmas and trying to come to terms with it. So she's like, she's playing ball. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Spencer (11:31.85)
Yes.
trying to accept it, trying to accept it. But that's not enough. She also has to do a Christmas like every single day. And when she says, I'm not feeling it tonight, oh, Tom, Tom don't like that. Tom, one time, Tom doesn't take that well. But I have to go, I go every year.
Luciano (11:40.424)
Everything.
Matt (11:49.079)
She says it once, one time.
Luciano (11:49.227)
Hahaha. Yeah.
Luciano (11:58.002)
I go every year, I have to go. It's mandatory, it's Christmas, it's gonna be fun, it's a break! Ha ha ha!
Spencer (12:00.33)
I have to go. She's, and she's like, she's like, well, maybe I just want to stay in it. And every time she says like, maybe she's not into it. If you notice his eyes widen and he takes a step closer to her. And he just comes and she steps backwards and like moves. And then she's like, nah, maybe not that. And then again, he goes, but I, but this is a very nice time of year to do it. And he steps closer to her and gets in her space.
Luciano (12:13.956)
You know.
Thanks for watching!
Luciano (12:23.119)
Yeah, I wish he had started speaking in the third person. Tom doesn't like when Tom doesn't do Christmas things. Tom has to go on the slide. He has to go on the sleigh ride. Yeah.
Spencer (12:30.518)
Tom needs Christmas. Santa won't be very happy if Tom doesn't make it on the slave ride.
Matt (12:37.635)
Tom's gonna be in Santa's naughty list if Tom doesn't go on the sleigh ride.
Spencer (12:39.342)
I'm sorry.
Luciano (12:41.264)
Yeah, I wish you had done that.
Matt (12:44.749)
Anyways, long story short, they obviously get engaged and get married. That's... Yeah. Naturally, as one does. That's just the nuances of the movie. I think you see why it's a really, you know, probably a stellar A-S tier crowd-pleasing movie. You're right, Spencer. 100%. Before we dive into plot holes and our fun questions, we should, as a proper podcast, just cover some of the things that...
Spencer (12:48.87)
That's it. Exactly. Um, naturally.
Luciano (12:49.007)
Of course. Of course.
Spencer (12:57.666)
10 out of 10, crowd pleaser. A plus cinema score.
Matt (13:12.681)
We didn't think maybe work so well in the movie. If you guys saw anything, I don't know if I saw too many things, but just a couple of things here or there that might've ruffled your feathers or, you know, of that range. I don't know if anybody wants to start off. If anybody has something they caught themselves.
Spencer (13:19.531)
Little housecleaning.
Luciano (13:20.953)
Yeah.
Spencer (13:29.814)
Well there was that one small thing, I don't know if you noticed, but Tom's a lunatic. The main protagonist of the film is insane.
Luciano (13:36.43)
Yeah
Matt (13:40.665)
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Luciano (13:41.77)
Yeah, he's quite like from the beginning. So here's the thing, okay, we should probably tell this to our listeners. I went in knowing 100% what the plot actually was, that he actually believes in Santa, but Spencer and Matt, not so much. So, yeah. So for me,
Spencer (14:00.67)
We did not. It was quite the reveal.
Luciano (14:06.682)
The main thing I was looking to see is that, okay, how are they going to actually sell this plot? Spoiler alert, they didn't. No, yeah. So they did not, yeah. But like for me, I was trying to pay attention to Tom a lot to see like how, and I was like, here's a man, he shows up the first time and I'm like, how is this?
Spencer (14:14.358)
The answer is no. The answer to that question is no.
I'm good.
Luciano (14:33.846)
How does this man look 30 and 70 at the same time? I don't understand. That was the first thing, like he looks like an old baby. I don't know, I don't understand like what his.
Spencer (14:37.314)
Hehehehehehe
Matt (14:45.788)
No, that's doing a disservice to old babies.
Spencer (14:48.162)
Hehehehehehe
Luciano (14:49.31)
Okay, my bad. To all the old babies out there listening, I'm sorry. Yeah. And like the way he acted, like he felt like they were trying to sell him as this nice guy who is like, oh, he's so nice. And he's so, you know, such a good guy. He's trying to do pro bono legal advice and, you know, just
Spencer (14:53.15)
Yeah, he's an interesting looking 40 to 70 year old man.
Matt (14:53.77)
Yeah.
Luciano (15:17.506)
bringing random children to his booth that he finds in the fucking 4th of July party, you know, that kind of stuff. And to me, I was like, I don't think they did a good job establishing that he was as crazy as he fucking is in this movie.
Spencer (15:20.897)
Ha!
collecting kids.
Spencer (15:36.546)
Like as someone who didn't know that was coming, it did come out of left field. Like he's like, I love Christmas. And she's like, yeah. And I'm like, okay, that's the crux of the movie. Is it's gonna be like, he wants to show her Christmas is great. She's against it. It's a Hallmark movie. It doesn't need more than that, right? Like that's what I was expecting. And it's not really Hallmark, but it's like that kind of garbage. And then at one point she's like, did you tell her about Santa? Like his best friends, like did you talk about the Santa thing? And he's like, I don't think she's ready for that yet. I'm like.
Luciano (15:41.431)
Oh, it did it.
Matt (15:44.073)
Yeah.
Luciano (16:01.793)
Yeah.
Matt (16:05.697)
Okay, so Spencer, you're not knowing what's happening, I can ask this question to. You thought he was gonna be Santa at some point, right? Like that, but like something like that, right?
Spencer (16:06.55)
What the fuck is that?
Spencer (16:10.548)
Yes.
Spencer (16:15.862)
I didn't think he was gonna be the Santa, but something like that, he was gonna be like, I'd play Santa as a thing, or it's really important to me. I love being Santa for the kids. And then, there's kind of a little setup, the only setup is his friend going, you tell her about the Santa thing? Like, it's like a dirty secret.
Matt (16:28.829)
Sure. Yeah.
Luciano (16:37.174)
No, okay, so let me ask both of you about this. So there's the scene when the first time Ella, I almost called her Katie, we'll get to that. But the first time Ella says, I want an iPhone. And then Lisa goes on, oh, she can't, you know, Santa can't make iPhones. And he goes, of course he can, he can make anything. Like, how did you guys?
Spencer (16:52.629)
Oh.
Spencer (16:58.19)
Of course he can. He can make anything.
Luciano (17:01.098)
What did you guys think about this? Because I was like, oh, here comes the crazy because I knew it was going to come. But what did you guys think about that scene?
Matt (17:06.944)
That's why I thought he was Santa Claus. The only way you can be that sure that Santa could do that is because he is Santa Claus. But I used logic and that's my mistake. I shouldn't have done that. Yeah, that's not me, 100%.
Luciano (17:09.594)
Oh, I see. Oh, you. Sense you used sense that was your that was your mistake.
Spencer (17:11.016)
Hehehehe
Spencer (17:15.156)
Yeah, you thought it was like maybe a fantasy movie.
Spencer (17:21.654)
Like I just thought that, you're right, in that scene I was like, oh wow, he's getting intense here. And he's like, what do you mean? They can make anything. And I thought it was more just like him not getting the hint, like a kind of like joke, and he's really like, because he's so pro-Santa Claus, he didn't want to ruin her beliefs. And like, so I thought he was being protective of Christmas and Santa, because he loves it so much.
Luciano (17:26.57)
Yeah, cause he gets it like elves can make anything. They can just the fucking yeah
Luciano (17:38.763)
I see.
Luciano (17:42.458)
Because I got so mad at him. I don't even have children. You guys have children, but I don't have children. And I was like, if I was telling my eight year old child that she's not getting an iPhone for Christmas and some fucking weirdo was like, of course he can. He can't, like, yeah. Yeah. And I was so mad. He was like, of course he can. He can make anything. Well, I think I remember Santa saying he can't give it to any children.
Spencer (17:48.114)
Oh yeah.
Spencer (17:57.682)
Oh no, it would be, it'd be done. I'd be like, we can't be together. You're gonna be doing this. This is, this is.
Luciano (18:11.714)
Younger than 11, but it doesn't deliver presents to any children before 10 older than 10, I was like Yeah, I was like and I like I was like is she gonna turn to him and say can you please nod you motherfucker? Like what the fuck is wrong with you?
Spencer (18:16.361)
Yeah, after ten.
Matt (18:17.15)
After 10.
Matt (18:25.589)
So.
Spencer (18:26.558)
She's like, I think Santa said shut the fuck up, Tom.
Luciano (18:28.711)
Hahaha
Matt (18:29.729)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Luciano (18:31.558)
I spoke with him last night and he wants you to shut your fucking pie hole.
Matt (18:34.177)
This, so this, this jumps to a question I have that I didn't, I didn't remember I had until talking about the scene where he like fucking throws Lisa under the bus with the iPhone. But like at the very end of the movie, um, what's her face? Gets the child, Ella, yeah, she gets an iPhone. And like, I understand, so the, the culminating point where they get married, they agree to basically let bygones be bygones and like understand that you gotta give a little and you gotta take a little like, not everybody's gonna, you know.
Luciano (18:47.999)
Ella. She does get it. Yeah.
Spencer (19:01.71)
You gotta give a little, give a little, take a little crazy. Give a little sanity, take a little crazy.
Luciano (19:04.184)
Give it... yeah, yeah.
Matt (19:04.325)
Yeah, take it a little crazy. But like, at no point, at no point did Lisa be like, oh, I 100% believe in Santa now. She's still, is very not much on board with Christmas. So like, is she gonna murder Tom? Because she's not gonna be a Santa brought that iPhone. Like Tom did, clearly.
Luciano (19:08.859)
What's a little crazy amongst friends, right?
Luciano (19:15.358)
Yeah, should do-
Spencer (19:24.824)
And do we think in the story it was inferring?
Luciano (19:25.643)
Oh, maybe he's gonna pass it as that he's gonna say no, it wasn't me. It was Santa
Spencer (19:30.346)
Well, that's gonna be a problem.
Matt (19:32.407)
Yeah, but they broke up over not wanting to go on a sleigh ride. You think they won't break up over buying an iPhone for a fucking eight year old? And it was just a question. Just curious, just asking questions.
Luciano (19:39.635)
Yeah, well...
Spencer (19:41.551)
That's a good point. In the movie, I think in the movie they were inferring it was from Santa, right?
Matt (19:49.89)
In the movie they inferred yes because like they showed like Santa going up the chimney or whatever right there's some dust from the chimney
Spencer (19:54.69)
So Santa's just giving away Apple products. Like that's a lawsuit. Just waiting to happen. You think Tim Cook's gonna let that slide?
Matt (19:58.931)
I mean.
Matt (20:03.911)
Yeah, Santa pays the appropriate amount to afford. It's marketing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly.
Spencer (20:06.487)
Oh, I see. He uses the same child labor. He just imports.
Luciano (20:10.509)
Yeah, he has the same setup as Foxconn has to build the effort. A pineapple phone.
Spencer (20:16.662)
No, that wasn't an apple. That was a that was a mapple phone. It was a knockoff. The fuck? Yeah, that was that would be a big problem.
Matt (20:22.165)
haha
Luciano (20:25.958)
Yeah. So like, I, cause I, I was very mad at that scene with the whole iPhone because I was like, look at this fucking guy who like is the boyfriend is like undermining the mother's authority with, with all of this. Like, so yeah.
Spencer (20:40.394)
Now, wasn't there a scene where he was pushing with her too, and then she basically said, she's like, it's my kid, Tom, just stop. But what were they arguing about in that scene? It's all a blur. It was something else where he was like pushing, well, he was pushing his like religious propaganda on her child once more. Yeah, like, he's like, Santa's everywhere, Santa's all knowing.
Luciano (20:46.324)
Yeah, yeah.
Matt (20:48.436)
She had to, yeah.
Luciano (20:52.406)
Hahaha Why you're saying the scenes were forgettable in this movie? How dare you?
Matt (20:52.663)
Um...
Matt (21:03.309)
Santa propaganda.
Luciano (21:06.97)
Oh yeah, so they're talking about believing in Santa or not. And she says like, I don't believe in Santa. And at some point Ella is gonna ask me and I'm gonna tell her the truth. And he's like, don't rub her of her, don't put your lack of faith on her. And she's like, okay, he says that, don't put your lack of faith on her.
Spencer (21:20.482)
and I'm gonna tell her.
We don't, we don't do that here. Don't push your lack of faith on her. That would, like, come on. Like that would be like such a deal breaker, like in any relation. In this movie, imagine that was just like, he was just a religious guy, like a different religion. And he's like, he's like.
Matt (21:34.689)
Mm.
Luciano (21:38.99)
Oh yeah, how many deal-breakers were there in this whole fucking movie?
Luciano (21:47.902)
Yeah, exactly. How do you know? Why do you mean you don't believe in the flying spaghetti monster? All hail, all hail his pasta far in this. Right. It was like, what do you mean? There's no spaghetti monster. What do you mean there's no spaghetti? You ate spaghetti yesterday. Is spaghetti exists? Don't put your lack of faith on the flying spaghetti monster on your daughter. Yeah.
Spencer (21:54.179)
Yeah, exactly. It's supposed to be. And she's like...
Spencer (22:05.102)
Spaghetti existed.
Spencer (22:09.011)
on your daughter. Give her a chance to believe this nonsense. Yeah, it was it was a little I don't want to say scary, but concerning.
Luciano (22:17.938)
It's concerning. Also, did you guys notice that when like they, there's one point where they're both in, they're all in Lisa's house and she's taking Ella to sleep and she starts making like Grinch voices because she doesn't wanna go to sleep. And he goes, that's not a Grinch thing, Lisa. So he believes in Grinch too. Like he thinks Grinch is also real.
Matt (22:18.405)
No, that's fine. Time's good guy.
Matt (22:45.433)
That's not that no we don't have enough I agree I agree with you that he does We don't We don't have time for those. There's too much unpack with the rest of this movie But that's a that might come up later in one of our questions. We don't know And I'm not foreshadowing it good. I just don't know So We have in this movie Tom who lives in will call it
Spencer (22:49.843)
I don't know if there's enough evidence to back that up, but it's possible.
Luciano (22:50.364)
We don't have time for this! Okay.
Luciano (23:03.201)
Yeah.
Matt (23:12.821)
the city of Denver. Lisa lives in these suburbs. And when I say Denver, audience just know that they show a couple of establishing shots of the city of Denver. But then everything else is such a generic place that you could be in your own backyard. I have no idea.
Luciano (23:16.183)
Right.
Spencer (23:26.87)
Yeah, all interior or like, and like, or green screen.
Luciano (23:27.374)
There's like what? Four different sets and that's it. Yeah.
Matt (23:30.989)
Yeah. They do a lot more green screen than you think they should. They green screen sledding, they green screen throwing snowballs because all the actually the sledding scene they green screen yeah when they're at a mountain. Yeah yeah it was bad. So this movie exists in Denver these two people have two friends well one friend only each I guess not even two friends.
Luciano (23:35.55)
Yeah, this.
Spencer (23:35.88)
than you'd expect.
Luciano (23:42.875)
The background when they're beginning is the worst chroma key that I've ever seen in my entire life, yeah.
Spencer (23:48.352)
Oh boy.
Luciano (23:58.156)
Yeah.
Matt (24:00.113)
And then we have the only other character that comes up on a regular basis is the, basically the ex, the ex, the exes, the first time we hear about the ex, he doesn't come to watch his daughter do a dance at the 4th of July. Yeah. Cause he's, he's going to his lake cottage or going to a lake with his girlfriend. I mean, maybe we don't know. And then the second time we hear about him,
Luciano (24:05.387)
The X.
Spencer (24:08.654)
The axis.
Spencer (24:14.838)
but we never see him.
Luciano (24:16.502)
We never see him.
Spencer (24:22.855)
I think he's been murdered.
Luciano (24:24.61)
Yeah.
Matt (24:30.109)
Where does he end up going? He's like extra gone.
Luciano (24:33.378)
So I think they mentioned he went to like a conference or whatever. Let me look it up.
Spencer (24:34.499)
It's been a garbage bag.
Matt (24:36.824)
Yeah
No, it's more like, it's like he just, like, Spencer's right, like he disappeared, he got murdered. Like it's not just a conference, he just like up and moved out of state or something, like he's just gone. Yeah, he died on the way back to his home planet.
Spencer (24:45.454)
Heheheheh!
Luciano (24:50.544)
Uh, yeah.
Spencer (24:51.274)
He had to go... ..to his ho- on his way back home.
Luciano (24:53.422)
I... Oh, Robert... Robert had to leave the country on assignment is what she says. What the fuck? I was so... I was like, assignment? Is he... Is he like supposed to be a marine or something? Is that what that is?
Matt (24:59.205)
Yeah, yeah, he dead.
Spencer (24:59.77)
Out of assignment. Yo, he'd... I know when someone dead and he dead.
Matt (25:08.701)
He could be a marine, he could be fucking a blogger, we don't know what he's up to.
Spencer (25:11.728)
He's at the bottom of a marine.
Luciano (25:12.865)
A blogger! Hahaha! Yeah.
Matt (25:17.449)
Hey man, the fucking Denver Nuggets don't follow themselves.
Luciano (25:20.961)
Yeah, it's true
Spencer (25:22.873)
He's a big Barghoz fan.
Luciano (25:25.546)
to leave the country on assignment. That's what she's. Yeah.
Matt (25:28.051)
Yep.
Spencer (25:28.744)
Robert had to leave. He will not be back. He will never be discussed again. She's never the daughter never mentions him.
Matt (25:30.357)
Hehehehe
Matt (25:33.969)
Problem Solved!
Matt (25:39.909)
No, never again. Listen, I think we have a lot to talk about in plot holes and I think we have a lot to talk about in questions. Anything else that was major that you need to get out of your system? Okay. Okay, let's talk about the plot holes in this movie. Listen, I'm gonna be honest with you people. You understand how cloth is made, correct? In the sense that a cloth is many thin sheets.
Spencer (25:51.406)
Ye- Yes, but we'll move on.
Luciano (25:53.858)
Yeah.
Spencer (26:04.75)
That's not a good start.
Matt (26:07.701)
of fabric that are layered on top of each other and they make, they end up making, you know, a sturdy piece of cloth, for lack of a better term, clothes. Yeah, interwoven thread. Great. So you understand you need a couple layers to really build a solid cloth, or at least if you're interweaving thread, lots of threads, you know, to tighten up together. And then the same thing in movies, you need a couple good solid plots as you weave them together to make a good solid overall plot. So the reason why we're
Spencer (26:14.666)
interwoven.
Luciano (26:16.154)
interwoven thread is what it is
Matt (26:35.485)
talking about this very obscure, possibly esoteric idea of fabric, is that this fucking movie has so many holes, it doesn't have a plot. None of this is anything. So when we talk about plot holes, there isn't one, it is all a plot hole.
Luciano (26:42.082)
Hahaha
Spencer (26:53.194)
It is a vacuum. It is a vacuum of blankets.
Luciano (26:53.207)
Yeah.
Matt (26:54.369)
It is maybe it is a it is a black plot hole. Like, I don't know.
Luciano (26:56.134)
Yeah, it's a whole plot. It's not a plot whole.
Matt (27:01.249)
Okay.
Spencer (27:02.126)
Imagine, if you will, a sheet that is held together by string. It will not keep you warm, nor cover your body, but you will hate it.
Luciano (27:11.582)
Yeah.
Matt (27:14.049)
That's the other thing too, yeah, it's not gonna do its job at all. Some examples, let's try to keep this. We gave this on options of the plots, but it's all there. But I think the biggest thing you can understand about why this movie falls apart is the last third to last quarter consists of them breaking up. And then immediately, Lisa sends Ella to Tom via...
Luciano (27:39.551)
That's when Robert goes out over the country on assignment. Robert is killed.
Matt (27:42.005)
Yeah, Robert is dead. Robert gets killed. Yeah, so Robert is killed.
Spencer (27:43.63)
I have to go now.
Spencer (27:48.487)
Robert left a written letter in a different handwriting saying he needed to leave. He did not sign it. Yeah.
Luciano (27:53.634)
Like she wrote it down with her left hand. It's like, oh, dad's handwriting is weird.
Matt (27:57.405)
Yeah, that's perfect. So, so they break up over a sleigh ride. Robert disappears forever. Wink. Ella was supposed to create a cardboard sled with Robert, but because he disappeared forever, wink, he's not available. Because Lisa is a woman, she has to send him, she has to send Ella to the only man she knows, Tom.
Luciano (28:05.782)
Hahaha
Luciano (28:17.243)
Hahaha!
Spencer (28:21.748)
Of course.
Matt (28:26.965)
to build this sled, which she just broke up with. She doesn't do it herself, that would be too awkward. So she sends her only friend to drop her off for her. They build the sled. Tom skips a bunch of Christmas stuff to build a sled for reasons.
Spencer (28:27.81)
who she just broke up with.
Luciano (28:28.168)
The sled.
Spencer (28:40.11)
if it takes days to build a sun...
Luciano (28:40.746)
Now he skipped the one thing, nutcracker.
Matt (28:44.829)
That's true. It takes days. Just so when I say in building a sled, it is cardboard and duct tape. He builds the world's largest cardboard duct tape sled that definitely would not hold up to anything. They show up at a random mountain in Denver. The plan clearly was that he was gonna ride in the sled with Ella, with the child. Not a child, his ex-girlfriend's child. He convinces his ex-girlfriend, convinces, forces his ex-girlfriend.
Luciano (28:55.051)
Yes.
Luciano (29:01.066)
with the child who's not his child.
Luciano (29:10.679)
B-B-Bullies her, really.
Matt (29:12.669)
bullies her into getting in the sled.
Spencer (29:14.39)
Don't be a chicken getting a slit. Yeah.
Luciano (29:16.19)
Yeah, yeah. What are you, a chicken mech fly?
Matt (29:20.917)
Get in the sled or I kill the child!
Spencer (29:23.5)
He's all nerd. She's gonna end up just like her daddy.
Luciano (29:24.75)
There's gonna be a bad slide accident if you don't come. Ha ha ha.
Matt (29:31.701)
assignment.
Spencer (29:33.019)
On assignment
Matt (29:35.189)
So they all get in the sled. They go down this hill. They somehow win this. They hit a jump to go faster than another sled. Don't worry about that. I just hate it so much.
Luciano (29:46.611)
It's the same physics from Hidden Strike.
Matt (29:49.229)
It is. It is a good accent. I forgot to add that obviously Asan and Sharon came to their daughter's sled race because reasons. Absolutely nothing.
Luciano (29:59.134)
Of course. Yeah.
Spencer (29:59.298)
They got, they got nothing going on. They got nothing going on in Denver.
Luciano (30:04.214)
Well, I mean, they could not have one without a son pushing them.
Matt (30:08.893)
He did, he did push them.
Spencer (30:08.91)
They're like, Hasan are you coming? He's like, I'm already here. I have nothing to do. This is my life.
Matt (30:12.113)
Yep. They need, they need a strong male to push them down the hill and the best they got is the son. So he did it. They win the race. They are celebrating afterwards in the chalet. Tom proposes. Lisa accepts. Tom, Tom then says, I'm finally a man.
Luciano (30:12.913)
Yeah, where else would I be?
Luciano (30:23.553)
Hahaha!
Luciano (30:34.899)
and he calls himself a man.
Spencer (30:39.074)
He says, I'm a man. He doesn't say finally.
Luciano (30:40.581)
He doesn't say I'm finally a man. You just made it 100% voice and I don't know how you did it.
Matt (30:43.735)
I'm sorry!
Spencer (30:48.138)
Hehehehe
Matt (30:49.8)
Is it worse? He says I'm finally... no he says...
Spencer (30:51.926)
No, he says, he goes, yeah, I'm a man. Ha ha ha.
Luciano (30:52.754)
He says, whoo, I'm a man.
Matt (30:55.865)
Yeah, okay, sorry, he says, yeah, I'm a man like he implies it before that he was not a man. So I think finally is anyways. He still does. Oh, that's the other thing Spencer is right. They agree that I don't know what they agree disagree. Tom is like, I guess I don't have to do all the Christmas things. And Lisa still has to put up with all of Tom's believing in Santa Claus and crazy Christmas stuff.
Spencer (31:03.118)
I mean, he does still believe in Santa Claus. He is.
Luciano (31:11.266)
The agreement to disagree. The agreement to disagree, yeah.
Luciano (31:21.082)
Yeah, yeah. No, don't forget.
Spencer (31:23.007)
And I believe he weaves Christmas into his proposal to the woman who hates Christmas.
Matt (31:26.143)
Oh, 100%. Yeah.
Luciano (31:26.906)
Don't forget that we get like a side sort of a side quest, if you will, of Lisa talking to Tom's only friend, Hassan, about the belief and how can he put up with it. And he goes, people believe in religion and it's kind of the same thing. So why would you be okay with one and not the other? And I was like, oh, boy, this movie is going into some direction that I didn't. Yeah.
Spencer (31:52.086)
This is just open a big old can of worms.
Luciano (31:55.838)
and uh and no that's what i was getting to it's like she goes oh all right bye thanks you're a good friend
Matt (31:56.767)
No one asks any follow up questions on that one whatsoever. Stop there.
Spencer (31:59.077)
Yeah, exactly!
Spencer (32:05.838)
So you're saying Santa is his religion? Listen, we said no follow-up questions. That was the first thing I said. Are you saying all other religions are fake? I said very clearly, there are no follow-up questions. I need to leave now. I need to see Robert. Goodbye. Mm-hmm. Ha ha.
Luciano (32:11.558)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Matt (32:11.701)
Hehehehe
Luciano (32:16.379)
No, no further questions you're under. Yeah. Yeah
Matt (32:18.845)
Nope, nothing. So, so, Robert is calling me on the telephone.
Luciano (32:29.019)
His assignment went badly. Hahaha.
Spencer (32:31.388)
He needs me for his assignment.
Matt (32:35.829)
So, I mean, and that is, the whole story is driven on a very loosely, like, I mean, it's fine. Any couple gets together in a movie because of reasons and it's glossed over. They just have a montage and it's fine. You know what, they had a little meet cute over the kid, great. They do some fun stuff, fine. They montage this shit out of the first part of the movie. They allude a lot of time for Tom to vamp about Santa Claus and how he's real. And so...
Luciano (32:51.858)
a lot of montages in this movie.
Spencer (32:55.198)
They gotta fill this time, baby.
Luciano (32:58.591)
Yeah.
Matt (33:04.169)
Like, that whole thing, and we talked about previous plot holes in the first section, or things that were weird. Like, I mean, they're not plot holes in the sense of like, hey, this thing should be changed to make the movie better, because like, the premise of Tom so aggressively believing in Santa is the crux of the movie. So if the crux of the movie is the plot hole, it's all hole.
Spencer (33:17.25)
Yeah
Luciano (33:17.745)
Hahaha!
Luciano (33:23.263)
Yeah.
Spencer (33:24.354)
Yeah.
Luciano (33:28.522)
What do you do? Exactly. This is like Swiss cheese, you know, the more cheese, the more holes. This is the more plot, the more holes. And you don't get any, because there's, if you remove that, if you try to fix that hole, you end up with a different movie. That's the problem here, right?
Spencer (33:31.053)
How do you fill that hole is what you're saying?
Matt (33:39.506)
Yeah, but it's like...
Spencer (33:50.13)
It's like when you try and seal one thing and then it opens up somewhere else. It's just constantly gonna be falling apart at the scene because it's such a flimsy story.
Luciano (33:57.39)
Yeah.
Matt (34:00.413)
Yeah, so, I mean, how do you fix this? Maybe you can't. Unless...
Luciano (34:06.754)
The what? So like the, yeah, I was gonna, I was gonna say, so like the one thing they could have done is have made in this crazy world that Santa actually is real in the end.
Spencer (34:07.158)
you unless you change the genre baby but we'll get to that
Matt (34:10.442)
Cool.
Spencer (34:19.818)
That would have, again, that would have worked better. Kind of like Elf, you know, in the movie Elf. He seems crazy because he's an elf. And then at the end, it's like, well, elves are real and Santa's real. So, and then it's like, we all believe in Christmas. It's all magical. But when that element is taken out of the film, Elf is just a crazy motherfucker, and no one would like him, like, until he gets redeemed for being correct.
Luciano (34:23.797)
Yeah.
Matt (34:26.801)
or the Santa Claus?
Luciano (34:26.815)
Yeah.
Luciano (34:30.882)
Yeah.
Matt (34:35.697)
Right. Yeah.
Luciano (34:36.664)
Yeah.
Yeah. Exactly, like Tom. Yeah, yeah.
Matt (34:46.269)
And not that this is the elf movie, but you notice Jovi's real heavy skepticism around elf in the movie, right? Like she kind of gets into him, but he's kind of still crazy. She doesn't trust him. She thinks she's a creep. Lisa really puts up a much worse fight. Like she, one thing she questions him on being a pedophile for, cause he looked after a child.
Spencer (34:54.442)
Yes.
Spencer (34:58.24)
Yes.
Luciano (35:06.754)
She was fine.
Spencer (35:14.419)
In the opening scene. Great start to a relationship.
Luciano (35:16.214)
Yeah.
Matt (35:16.389)
And then after that, it's, oh, that's a funny coincidence. I thought you were a pedophile. Let's, let's date. They don't, clearly don't ever have sex. I mean, that's pretty obvious from the whole movie, but.
Spencer (35:25.001)
Very clear.
Luciano (35:25.286)
Yeah, of course they can't. They can't because it's PG so that they can't.
Matt (35:27.621)
Yeah. They can't stay over at each other's houses at night, how they gonna have sex?
Luciano (35:31.746)
That's true. Yeah, they have a curfew. They both have a curfew by the time they're done playing house They have to go to their separate houses Maybe this whole movie set in some sort of a mental asylum and you know
Matt (35:37.553)
Yep, exactly.
Spencer (35:44.818)
Again, this movie works a lot better when you change the genre. All of a sudden it becomes a different story.
Luciano (35:50.418)
Yeah, this is a David Lynch movie and everybody is crazy. Okay, I'm in. Yeah.
Matt (35:53.215)
Well, so...
Spencer (35:53.487)
Yeah, yeah, Nelson. Yeah, you soaked me
Matt (35:58.409)
I didn't want to rush us into the questions, but we've said the blood hole is everything. I'm not sure what more we need to say about the blood hole being everything.
Luciano (36:09.634)
I mean, do you have any idea of how you can keep the same movie and still make it make sense to some extent? Because I can't see a way.
Matt (36:17.789)
No, because...
Spencer (36:18.946)
Well, there's a couple, there's a couple of ways. One would be you show Tom's backstory and give us, give the audience some kind of reason to, to like empathize with this man who believes in Santa Claus. Cause when you
Luciano (36:27.074)
Oh boy. Tom, Tom has a Tom has a backstory. It's called silence of the lambs.
Spencer (36:38.462)
But like actually like if they give him any kind of Like character development then it's not just this like blank Wide-eyed man saying he believes in Santa Claus and we have no reason to like empathize with him in any way whatsoever Yeah, so earnestly like saying like no it's real and you're just like oh Okay
Luciano (36:44.343)
Right.
Luciano (36:49.274)
Hahaha!
Luciano (36:52.798)
Like, so, so fucking earnestly too.
Luciano (37:01.838)
Yeah, yeah, like that's the thing I was expecting in that scene when he when they're like, you know, the two of them in on a date with their friends. That alone is a weird setup. And he goes, I believe in Santa. And I was expecting her to kind of you know, you know, when you're talking to a crazy person and you don't want to break eye contact as you're afraid of what's gonna happen, you just back away slowly keeping eye contact. Yeah, that's what I expected.
Spencer (37:24.922)
He just start walking. But also it could have been easily been like him just being like, maybe Santa could be real. I think it's possible. I don't know why everyone's so sure he's not, but he doesn't do that. He's like, no, Santa's real. He is real. And everyone's like, you're not serious.
Luciano (37:43.347)
And she calls him like, but what about this? No, that can be explained by magic. The childlike wonder.
Spencer (37:46.962)
Yeah, like it's like he's like so he's so like dead set on it being a hundred percent real
Luciano (37:52.703)
Yeah.
Matt (37:53.137)
Spencer, I'm willing to give you this so you make him seem like a more normal character. How do you explain he's single at like 45? Because I think his craziness explains why he's single.
Spencer (38:04.605)
That is the explanation. Oh, I see what you're saying. Well, he still believes in Santa Claus. So, he says it better, but so the audience isn't like as...
Luciano (38:05.641)
That's the explanation.
Luciano (38:09.622)
Hahaha!
Matt (38:11.413)
Yeah.
Luciano (38:13.418)
Yeah, not only does he believe in Santa Claus, but have you seen his house in December? Can you imagine? What other woman than Lisa would not run away screaming from the house the moment you saw it?
Spencer (38:19.962)
Yes, I think-
Matt (38:27.665)
This is the thing, there are plenty of people in the world that love Christmas. Not... yes. Yes, like that. I'm sorry, I'm on a podcast with two Jewish people, so this isn't the best reference point. Well, let me tell you what would happen to Christ, you're not gonna like this version.
Luciano (38:30.655)
Not like that.
Spencer (38:32.33)
Yes, like that.
Luciano (38:35.231)
Really?
Spencer (38:39.294)
What's Christmas? Tell me about this Christ guy. I don't know about that. It's not like he had it coming. Yeah, exactly. Pretty sure that was the Romans of my history. Okay, don't put it on us.
Luciano (38:41.754)
Who's this Christ person?
Luciano (38:52.919)
Listen, Mel, listen, Mel, we're not talking about this here.
Matt (38:53.089)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Matt (39:02.533)
Anyways, but the answer is yes, there are people who are like, as soon as Halloween's over in Canada or as soon as Thanksgiving's over in the States, right to Christmas. Massive decorations, everything is Christmas based. They make these ho-
Luciano (39:16.954)
inside the house with a talking Santa and using a Santa mug in July like he was
Matt (39:20.101)
Oh yeah, easily. Dude, there's a reason why- Yes.
Spencer (39:21.334)
For sure.
Spencer (39:25.782)
You know, Luciana, you know how as Jews immediately when Halloween's over, we put up our Hanukkah decorations. We light candles all over the place. We tell our friends about it. We still.
Luciano (39:31.806)
Yeah, of course. Yeah. We start lighting the Anuka candles in like November 1st. It's the biggest fucking manor you've ever seen in your life.
Spencer (39:40.214)
No, yeah, it's 30 candles on it and you know, we just tell everybody we all we all believe in Moses and we just like Tom.
Matt (39:46.373)
Hahaha!
Luciano (39:50.578)
Yeah, of course. Hanukkah Harry. It's Hanukkah Harry.
Matt (39:51.993)
I thought it was like an eight by, I thought it was like an eight by eight situation where it was like 64 candles. Yeah.
Luciano (39:55.99)
Like I'm Matrix. Yeah. Anyway, fair enough. Yeah, we believe that Hanukkah Harry is gonna bring us Hanukkah guilt as he does every year when you're a kid. That that, well, do we do? He exists and I will die on this hill. Yeah, you are. No, you are. No, he is his, because his friends are two Jews. So then he gets, yeah.
Spencer (39:57.686)
Hehehe
Spencer (40:02.124)
We all believe in...
Spencer (40:10.678)
I was gonna say we all believe in Mel Brooks. He's real. Hehehehehehe
Matt (40:17.801)
Am I... sorry, am I allowed to believe in Mel Brooks or...?
Spencer (40:20.561)
No, no, that's our thing.
Okay yeah that's a lot. I'll give you his number. No!
Matt (40:25.426)
Hey, it's Panoff.
Luciano (40:27.46)
Hahaha!
Matt (40:30.783)
Anyways, back to this movie.
Well...
Luciano (40:34.998)
Yeah, let's keep talking about Mel Brooks.
Matt (40:38.345)
Let's just get into the questions. This is the only place left to be at. We've alluded to it a bit, and I think it's a very good point. We can fix this movie, but we're going to have to change genres. And there's no more point in genre I can see that can fix this movie so quickly than the horror genre.
Spencer (40:56.014)
100%.
Luciano (40:56.927)
Yeah.
Matt (40:57.537)
How can we take this movie and make it into a Christmas horror flick that all the kids are going to love? And it can't be Megan.
Spencer (41:04.75)
Okay, let me just start. I'm just gonna set it up. You guys can help me take it away. Okay, to make this movie a horror movie, the first half is exactly the same. Exactly. So basically, when he tells her he believes in, basically all you have to do, and I was actually thinking about this when I'm watching it, when he's telling her that he believes in Santa Claus, instead of like a, you know.
Luciano (41:08.921)
Why not? Okay.
Luciano (41:20.466)
Up until when? What's the pivot scene?
Luciano (41:29.038)
I'm sorry.
Spencer (41:34.582)
like a jingles Christmas jingle. It's just like a really creepy music on. Yeah, it's like swelling. It's a ding, ding. And he's like, no, Santa Claus is real.
Luciano (41:40.874)
like an eerie, like eerie, swally music.
Matt (41:47.106)
But it's gotta be like a Christmas carol that they tease out into creepy. Yeah.
Spencer (41:51.594)
that it's off, it's off at a key, it's like in minor.
Luciano (41:52.158)
Yeah, no, like take take. No, yeah, I was gonna say take jingle bells, but playing in a minor key. There you go. Yeah.
Spencer (41:58.286)
Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
Matt (41:58.629)
Yeah.
Matt (42:03.758)
I see the trail already.
Luciano (42:07.439)
In a world where jingle bells is in a minor key
Spencer (42:13.247)
And basically, so it starts off where he's like, oh, he believes in Santa and she's like, that's not so bad. And you know, and then there's like the scene where they're like, they're doing the tree and the kid puts up the ornament and then it's like, he seems so nice. He's exactly the way he is for the first half that he is in the movie. But then when she puts it up, he goes, no, that doesn't go there. That ornament goes here. You know, it's like,
Luciano (42:32.296)
Oh, I see he starts getting like, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's like, why did you put the red ball there? Can't you see there's a red ball right beside it? Ella! Don't you know? Yeah.
Spencer (42:41.658)
Yeah, the red ball goes here. Santa, yeah, Santa won't like that, Ella. You might be naughty. And it's like, okay. And then, you know, when she's telling you about the iPhone, she's like, Santa can't make an iPhone. Yes, he can. And he's like, really, you know, don't you say that. Don't say that in front of the child. You know, it's like, all those scenes just.
Matt (42:50.817)
Thanks for watching!
Luciano (42:52.846)
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Luciano (42:58.626)
Don't you say that about Santa. Yeah. Don't you? Yeah. Do you, do you want to be on the naughty list?
Spencer (43:08.974)
And it just keeps progressing and progressing and then when she's like when she says no to the sleigh ride Again exactly the same, but I go every year
Luciano (43:10.663)
Yeah, so he
Luciano (43:19.17)
Yeah, he goes, no, I think that's the point where he goes, no, but Tom has to go. Tom has to go because Tom goes every year and Tom is, Tom wants to be on the good list, not on the naughty list.
Spencer (43:24.711)
Exactly. Tom's a nice boy. Tom's a good boy.
Matt (43:30.261)
So I think, right, I think this is where you cut to Tom on the sled, but this is where you start to see something's off, right? Tom's a little, he's rocking, there's a little bit like, there's like red on him, you know? Like a red glow, you can't tell if it's like blood or if it's like there's lights or.
Luciano (43:38.43)
Yeah, like he's like, he's rocking it.
Spencer (43:38.799)
Yeah, yeah
Spencer (43:45.794)
Like red glow?
Luciano (43:47.914)
No, like, oh, I was gonna say, it shows his hands and he's like wringing them, but there's like this red sheen on his hands.
Matt (43:56.209)
No, yeah, we are we got to get into like he may have murdered somebody at this point. We don't know. Yeah
Spencer (43:59.202)
Well that's when the next morning she goes, Oh, Robert didn't make it. Wasn't Robert supposed to come today? He goes, Oh, Robert had to go on assignment. Oh, really? That's weird.
Luciano (44:05.459)
Yeah. On assignment. Yeah, no. And then they get to the she gets to the magazine blog, whatever the fuck she works at. And and they go, Oh, did you guys see the news this morning? They found they found a body. They found a body. Yeah, it was like completely drained of blood and dressed like Santa. Yeah. No.
Matt (44:10.486)
Ha ha ha!
Matt (44:21.769)
Mm-hmm.
Spencer (44:28.206)
Choke to death with the Christmas lights.
Matt (44:32.471)
I think it's... hahahaha It's like, garrotted with... Okay. I was going to say that was garrotted with the lights. Yeah.
Luciano (44:33.226)
Choked with the stocking, with the stocking, with the stocking from them. Yeah.
Luciano (44:39.875)
Got right in with the lights, yeah that works too.
Spencer (44:41.527)
They go, that's weird that Robert went on assignment, he's a painter. He works from home. No, he had an assignment in Guatemala. He will not be back. He typed a letter explaining it.
Luciano (44:45.464)
Ha ha!
Luciano (44:51.999)
Yeah.
Matt (44:54.061)
He had a painting assignment.
Luciano (44:56.038)
Yeah. And I think what happens like also when she says she's not going to go and she puts her foot down and he goes, he goes, okay, Tom's going to go now. And then it shows him like on that rocking on the sleigh ride. And then it closes up to what he's holding in his hand. And he's holding like a clipboard with a piece of paper that says naughty and good. And he raises her name from the good and writes it on naughty.
Spencer (45:18.865)
Oh.
Luciano (45:24.51)
And like... Oh, yeah, that's gonna ruin this movie.
Spencer (45:25.423)
It's a little on the nose. We're going subtle here. This is an art house film. We're going A24 with this one, okay? It's not Blumhouse.
Matt (45:30.641)
I know I like where you're going, but it's- What happens is, He- you see him write Robert's name on the naughty list after he's murdered him.
Spencer (45:38.862)
Yes. Yeah. And then you find out what Robert's dead the next day after you put some.
Luciano (45:43.226)
Oh, he crosses like he writes. So he writes Robert's name on a list, but you don't see what it is. It's just on a piece of paper. And then he kills him. And then when you hear about it, it just shows him crossing the name off. And then you see it's a naughty list.
Matt (45:47.653)
Yep. Yes.
Spencer (45:55.906)
And then you're like, oh wait, did he do it? Or is it like some more powerful being, supernatural that killed him?
Luciano (46:00.306)
Yeah. Oh, do we want to go that way?
Matt (46:00.541)
Right, sorry Luciano just to be pedantic, he gets his name taken off the nice list, not the naughty list.
Luciano (46:07.294)
No, no, his name is on the naughty list and he just crosses the name. Yeah. So what? Okay. Fine. All right. Fine.
Matt (46:10.757)
Nah, no. That's confusing. You gotta do a nice list and then he's off the nice list when he dies. Come on, this is an art house film. It's not this film. It's gotta have logic.
Spencer (46:12.203)
Yeah, yeah.
Spencer (46:16.806)
A24. It's A24, okay? And then, so as this movie goes, oh, then they're preparing for the race, right?
Luciano (46:27.294)
No, wait, there's something before the race. So I want to talk about the fucking talking Santa that's in Robert's house.
Spencer (46:33.998)
Oh yes, that's a big setup. So for the audience, he has a animatronic, borderline life-size Santa Claus that talks, and obviously in our movie it's gonna be like, ho ho, Merry Christmas.
Luciano (46:37.076)
Yeah.
Matt (46:41.045)
Yes.
Luciano (46:41.097)
Yeah.
Luciano (46:47.066)
Yeah, yeah, it's like a ho ho.
Matt (46:50.817)
Not- not a- that's what you see, but then eventually, Vet Santa is telling Tom what to do. But the scene- But the scene is distorted, so you don't know if Tom is like, actually seeing this, or if Tom is like, on drugs, or like, fucked up. Yeah.
Luciano (46:57.446)
Yeah, that's where I was going with it. Like.
Spencer (46:58.084)
Yeah, yeah.
Luciano (47:05.429)
Yeah.
Spencer (47:07.527)
That's the art house angle. We have to end the movie where it's unclear. Because that's what all those movies, if it's actually supernatural or if he was just crazy. We gotta be like, just leave that. The way they do that is the same way they do in the movie, where the dirt falls from the chimney at the end.
Luciano (47:11.021)
Yeah.
Luciano (47:16.094)
Yeah.
Luciano (47:22.394)
Yeah, and what I was going to say is what happens is after he crosses Robert's name off of the list, we see him go back home and he walks into the house and the scene is focused on that Santa. We just hear him come into the house and he drops his keys on the table and then he comes up to the Santa and he puts a coat around the Santa and it's Robert's coat. And he goes, there you go Santa, now you're warm. And the Santa goes, ho, ho.
Spencer (47:23.926)
Subtle inception.
Spencer (47:46.449)
Mmm.
Spencer (47:52.402)
And then there should be a scene where he's talking to the Santa and he goes, I don't want to put Lisa on the naughty list. She's good to me. And then he's like, but there's no answer. He just keeps, he's just, you don't hear the answer. Yeah. He keeps going.
Luciano (48:00.186)
Oh, and then he can like, we don't hear the answer, but he keeps the conversation going. Yeah, I like that.
Matt (48:05.549)
He is this conversation happens while he's building the sled for Ella Right, so he's having that crazy conversation
Luciano (48:08.662)
The sled. Yeah.
Does he, does he start putting like booby traps on that? Like.
Matt (48:18.337)
No, no, no. I think that really he's having that argument with Santa because it's gonna turn out that he is going to... Then he's gonna convince Lisa to get in the sled still. With the peer pressure. But the sled is a sled for... murder.
Spencer (48:28.766)
Yeah, with the peer pressure and the bullying.
Luciano (48:31.402)
Mm-hmm.
Luciano (48:35.338)
That's what I mean. He starts like, he starts putting like things into that sled.
Matt (48:39.762)
Oh, I don't think he puts anything in the slide to make it a booby trap I just think he drives it off a cliff and kills them all or like slams into Freddy and Freddy's dad Well, they hit the jump and land on Freckles and Freckles's dad killing them
Luciano (48:44.341)
Oh.
Spencer (48:45.278)
No, like it, no, it has to be like it.
Luciano (48:50.742)
HAHAHAHA
Spencer (48:51.834)
No, it's gotta be like it's going for the edge about to go off, but the mom like jumps out and she's like, oh my god, and the thing goes off and it like goes off a cliff with the other kid. The freckles goes off and then she's like, oh my god, we almost done it. And Tom's like, oh my god, I'm so, that could have been horrible. And then she's like, what the fuck?
Matt (48:54.623)
Ehem.
Luciano (49:03.123)
Oh yeah, he, she...
Matt (49:09.529)
Yeah, they get to the edge and like it you don't see it but Tom's like dry because Tom's in the back So Tom is you can see him like driving the shifter. So he's like driving them all off the cliff And then and then you're right spencer like they don't fall off because like at the last second they all like jump out of the way But freckles and his dad die Yeah
Luciano (49:16.074)
He has like a steering thing. He has a...
Yeah.
Luciano (49:26.654)
No, like that because, yeah, so no, so here's how it happens. Like, so they're going and he's steering them that way. And she sees like, Tom, what's going on? I can't stop. We're going to fall. And he goes, I can't, I can't. Right. And then she grabs Ella and jumps and he's going to stop it. But like freckles and his dad are really into the race. So he rams them and they fall off the cliff.
Spencer (49:28.652)
Freckles is done.
Luciano (49:51.498)
And he goes, oh no, that could have been such a big, much bigger disaster than just Frackles, my enemy dying. Yeah, he starts getting super unhinged. Like he gets more and more unhinged. I heard, I'm sorry, I heard grind house.
Spencer (49:58.87)
subtle. I like it. I like your subtlety.
Matt (50:02.824)
I'm not sure you know what art house means. Yeah. Oh, wow.
Spencer (50:06.374)
Again, you're writing a Blumhouse film? We're going for A24. No, no, I see where you're confused. And then I think the final act is, you know, she starts to obviously put together that he's unhinged and she goes to his house and she's like, wants to talk to him and she wants to ask, you know, Hassan, his friend, for help. And she sees, Hassan, sorry. And then...
Matt (50:21.345)
crazy.
Matt (50:31.709)
It's Hassan, not Hassan.
Luciano (50:32.446)
It's us. Yeah.
Spencer (50:34.982)
She goes to Hassan and then she can't find him and then she sees the Santa Claus under the blanket like it was in the movie. And she like goes reaches out and it's all like, sit, jingle bells, jingle bells. And she pulls it down and Hassan's there and he is like, has, he's split in half vertically. You got to have like, you got to have one crazy kill. No, no, but you got to have that shock kill because every kill so far has been pretty tame.
Luciano (50:50.018)
Hahaha!
Luciano (50:58.917)
Oh, but I'm not subtle.
Spencer (51:05.286)
off camera and then this one you're like it's like oh shit he's fully crazy and this you killed we'll have a scene earlier on where hasan's like trying to tell him talk him off the edge
Luciano (51:09.93)
But why did he kill Hassan? Hassan didn't do anything.
Matt (51:15.133)
No, no, it's simple. Lisa goes to talk to Asana in the movie, right? And he's crazy, so he's like, what'd you guys talk about? And he's like, I was just trying to get her into being with Santa. It's like, no, what did she actually say to you? Everyone loves Santa, right? He's already crazy.
Luciano (51:20.078)
Mm-hmm. Oh, he's like jealous.
Luciano (51:31.37)
Yeah. And then he goes, he goes, go, go.
Spencer (51:32.458)
Yeah, no, Ahsan says, I got it. Ahsan says, he's like, what'd you say to her? He's like, oh, I was just trying to get her to accept you for your believing in Santa. I just told her it's just his way. He just believes in something that's not real, but that's his belief. And then he's like, you don't think Santa's real? You know, and that's like, you told her that Santa's not real, and it's just like, you just see him clicking away.
And then he's like, I have to go. I have to go now. I have to get my man cutting ax.
Luciano (52:03.173)
Yeah, so you don't believe?
Luciano (52:08.394)
Hahaha!
Matt (52:09.502)
No, I honestly he just like you just cut the scene there right you hard cut the scene and they show up later and a
Spencer (52:11.97)
Hard cut.
Luciano (52:12.638)
Yeah, yeah. Just like cut on Tom's like perplexed face. Yeah.
Matt (52:20.289)
Sure, yeah. Like, eye twitching, yeah. Yeah, I think this all works. I think we've nailed it. I think we've made this film amazing. Yep.
Spencer (52:21.326)
You see the circuits. Yeah, the circuits just... Ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk ptk p
Luciano (52:23.378)
Yeah, yeah.
Spencer (52:29.577)
And then the final act is him dressed up as Santa Claus. Being like, see Santa is real. And he's like coming in through the chimney or coming through the windows.
Luciano (52:32.274)
Yeah, murdering people. Yeah. But no, he's like trying to kill her running after her with an axe going believe in me. I'm Santa. It's me. I'm real. Ho ho bitch.
Spencer (52:44.066)
Ho ho ho! Can't you see I'm real? Yeah, I'm real! Ho! Dirty ho!
Matt (52:48.445)
Hey! You don't say bitch in an arthouse film, sir. Nah.
Luciano (52:52.673)
Yeah, you do.
Matt (52:57.017)
That's better. I think she shows up. He has Ella and Ella's like bound up sitting on his lap because he's Santa Claus. And so she has to save Ella.
Luciano (52:59.838)
Ho ho you ho! Ha ha ha! Oh!
Spencer (53:01.44)
Hehehehehehe
Yes.
Luciano (53:08.454)
Yeah. And he goes like, what do you want little girl? Oh, you want your mom to believe in Santa? Do you? And she goes
Spencer (53:08.637)
Mm-hmm, that's creepy.
Spencer (53:16.714)
Yeah, you're not going to get your wish unless you believe too. Do you believe little girl? And she goes, yes, and he goes, I don't lie to me. OK.
Luciano (53:20.142)
Yeah. Jesus.
Yeah.
Matt (53:24.998)
Perfect. So how does
Luciano (53:29.632)
Yeah!
Matt (53:30.374)
Okay, we've spent enough time on this. The last thing we have to do though is obviously the killer has to quote-unquote die. He'll come back for the sequel obviously, but in this case. So how does Lisa kill him?
Spencer (53:37.598)
Yeah, that was an end. Uh, yes.
Luciano (53:37.952)
Yeah.
He, he, no, so she, he's running after her. I got this. He's running after her and they go like, they go around the house and she goes outside, right, of the house, like trying to run away from him and he thinks she went back in and he wants to catch her faster because he's outside. So he goes in through the chimney and he falls on the fire and catches fire and dies. I know it's terrible.
Spencer (54:06.998)
That's you're out of the writers room. You're out. No, there has to be the client. The climax is her coming into seeing the daughter on his knee. And he's like, I'll let her go if you believe. And then she's like, I do believe. And he's and he's like, you have to prove it. And then he makes her.
Matt (54:09.761)
Alright, you're out of here.
Luciano (54:10.456)
I know it's terrible, it was on purpose.
Luciano (54:16.948)
Okay.
Spencer (54:31.498)
I don't know. How do you prove you believe in Santa Claus? He's like, if you believe in Santa Claus, you have to wear a sun skin just like Rudolph. Ha ha ha.
Luciano (54:36.713)
You have to wear a sunskin as a coat.
Spencer (54:45.238)
He says, if you believe I'll get, I'll see a sign. And then she like flickers the Christmas lights. She's gotta use Christmas against them. You know, and then she plays like the Sonos and it plays a Christmas song. And he's like, Christmas is alive. And then she's like, run Ella. And then he's like, Ella starts running. And then she says, Santa's got a present for you motherfucker. And she like takes a candy cane and sticks it in his eye. There you go.
Luciano (54:53.82)
Yeah, I like that.
Luciano (55:12.118)
I was gonna I was gonna say they could go on a car chase and he can like fly off a cliff And we don't know if he dies or not
Spencer (55:16.906)
No, you need a graphic... No, the next movie comes back with one eye.
Matt (55:19.135)
You know.
Luciano (55:21.459)
Ah, okay, that works too.
Matt (55:22.769)
You need a graphic death. I think I'm almost all the way there, but it's like, there needs to be a struggle. Why are there pointed candy canes in the house? Like, is it stuck in? No, I know, but like, if she hasn't been in the murder house or doesn't know where all the murder things are, so where is this?
Spencer (55:24.375)
Yeah.
Luciano (55:33.443)
Because it's his house.
Luciano (55:40.698)
Oh, okay. So maybe instead of a candy cane, they're fighting, like they're struggling and they knock off the tree and like she grabs one of the ornaments and smashes on his face. Yeah, yeah.
Matt (55:49.297)
No, no, I got it. There's always a star at the top of the tree. And I think they use that, honestly, in Violent Nights, but we're stealing it for this too. Yeah, David Harbour definitely stuck a fucking star in one of the guy's eyes.
Spencer (55:52.354)
Yeah.
Spencer (55:56.194)
Did they?
Spencer (55:59.694)
I just remember him turning a guy into goo from going through a chimney.
Luciano (56:01.13)
I think, no, he shoves it up someone's ass, I think. Yeah.
Matt (56:04.669)
Anyways, that's what we're doing with G. They struggle they fight over the tree and she gets the star from the tree and pops them Yeah
Luciano (56:10.734)
stabs him.
Spencer (56:10.858)
And she gets over him, but she has to say a line, which is, no, it can't be Merry Christmas, that's too much. I like my line. Believe in this, motherfucker.
Luciano (56:13.271)
Yeah.
Luciano (56:17.463)
Yeah, yeah, she go. She goes, yeah, I was going to say something like that.
Spencer (56:26.209)
And scene.
Luciano (56:26.688)
I wanted a line that had to do with the star. Or, you know, I can't think of one right now.
Spencer (56:32.15)
A star is born, motherfucker. Always follow the North Star!
Matt (56:34.554)
Oh, okay, no, no.
Luciano (56:34.648)
That's...
Matt (56:38.438)
No.
Luciano (56:39.021)
What?
Matt (56:41.913)
It's not a star. I think we're back to the ornament thing. But it's a very large ornament that's a North Pole. Like large but small enough to jam in his eye. Like it breaks off. And she's like, welcome to the North Pole, bitch. Stabs him. Yeah. We're workshopping. All right.
Luciano (56:45.346)
Mm-hmm.
Luciano (56:48.627)
Okay.
Luciano (56:54.654)
Nice. Okay. Yeah.
Spencer (56:54.878)
Mmm, not bad. It's not bad. We'll workshop it. No, it's a star you say Jesus was born under the star of Bethlehem, motherfucker!
Luciano (57:06.35)
Twinkle, twinkle, motherfucker. It becomes her catchphrase for the second movie where she's a Santa Hunter.
Spencer (57:07.803)
Yeah.
Spencer (57:15.561)
He hunts male Santa man. Mall Santa Claus's.
Luciano (57:15.574)
Hahaha!
Luciano (57:20.661)
Yeah.
Matt (57:20.953)
Yeah, so now you're scaring everybody. It's like, is your mall Santa Claus an undead zombie? Anyways, too far.
Luciano (57:26.89)
Yeah, it's a genre shift on the sequel.
Spencer (57:27.374)
We'll save that for the sequel.
Matt (57:30.637)
Yeah. Um, other fun questions. Hey, Tom is very excited about flocking. And if you hear me say this to you.
Spencer (57:38.284)
What a turn!
Luciano (57:38.926)
Wait, can't say that, this is a PG podcast, sir.
Matt (57:42.181)
I didn't make the term. The term is in the movie. I guess it's a real thing in the Christmas culture, that subculture that we don't know enough about. Well, you guys don't know. Yeah, I just, trust us. Trust me. I don't flock. I don't flock personally, but I've heard others do.
Luciano (57:47.164)
Is it?
Spencer (57:49.118)
We wouldn't know. Is it some kind of candle?
Luciano (57:52.103)
Okay.
Luciano (57:55.467)
Hahaha!
Spencer (57:57.118)
Sure, I have friends that flock regularly
Matt (58:00.445)
So for you at home who think I'm talking about jerking off, I technically am not. The movie uses the term to denote spraying fake snow on a Christmas tree. That's not much to drive for 24 hours, which was fucking wild to me when he said it. What a weird piece of fact for the movie. Like I'm sure that's the most factual part of the movie was when he's like, oh no, it's got to dry. We'll come back tomorrow and get it. Like who gives a shit taking it home?
Luciano (58:16.023)
Yeah.
Spencer (58:16.437)
Yeah.
Spencer (58:20.906)
Hehehehe
Just take it home. Yeah, exactly. And of all the things to do accurately.
Matt (58:29.781)
But I do want to know why flocking isn't the euphemism for jizzing on a tree.
Luciano (58:34.524)
Why it isn't?
Matt (58:36.101)
Tell me why it isn't, because it...
Spencer (58:38.998)
So it's flocking is when you love someone very much.
Luciano (58:41.849)
Hmm
Luciano (58:45.71)
When a mummy and a daddy love each other very much, daddy flocks on her tree. Wait, you wanted us to say how it's not...
Spencer (58:47.426)
Mommy and Daddy love each other very much and Mommy agrees to do some extra things for Daddy because Daddy wants a little spice, he wants the spice of his life.
Spencer (59:05.502)
I can't explain how it's not masturbating. I don't think so. It's flocking is it's not masturbating if you do it onto the tree. Then it's flocking.
Luciano (59:05.758)
I don't know. I don't... Yeah, I don't think we can.
Matt (59:07.973)
and
Luciano (59:20.109)
Yeah, it has a purpose.
Matt (59:21.895)
So it is euphemism. It's a direct euphemism for... wait, sorry. It's not a euphemism because it's actually what you do. We're using... you're slicing at that narrowly.
Luciano (59:30.764)
Yeah.
Spencer (59:33.55)
It's not a euphemism. It's a direction. It's an order.
Luciano (59:35.646)
That's how it, there you go, that's how it's not, it's, that's how it's not a euphemism. It's the actual act.
Matt (59:35.794)
Yeah, it's.
Spencer (59:40.93)
But in the movie, did they use it as a play on words, kinda?
Luciano (59:43.59)
They at one point they say something like that. Let me take a look. But they say something like flock you or whatever.
Spencer (59:47.19)
They kinda did.
Matt (59:47.408)
I don't know. Not really, but we're moving on. We'll come back to this. I want to ask you a different question.
Spencer (59:52.318)
I don't think we will.
Luciano (59:53.75)
Hey, oh, well, the first time first thing he asks them is you guys ever been flocked? I was like, oh, oh this movie is going somewhere else
Matt (59:59.624)
Yeah.
Spencer (01:00:00.278)
Okay
Matt (01:00:02.377)
There you go, it happened. Moving on, I do have questions about Tom, many, but we'll start with a really easy one. At the end of the movie, Tom does say, no, it's not now I'm a man, because I've been told that's not correct. I am a man. He cheers and says the words, I am a man. What? We're probably getting married, makes Tom a man. We're all married, so we should know.
Spencer (01:00:20.015)
I am a man!
Luciano (01:00:29.642)
We should. One would think. One would imagine that we know.
Matt (01:00:31.969)
Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Spencer (01:00:33.072)
Well...
Well, everyone knows that as you get older and once you get married, it is much like it's like a second bar mitzvah. Am I right? It brings you into manhood. Yes. The first bar mitzvah is it takes you from boyhood to boy manhood. It is a middle phase.
Luciano (01:00:44.246)
Hahahaha!
Matt (01:00:45.845)
Um, I have a follow up question.
Luciano (01:00:49.866)
What is the first word we select?
Luciano (01:01:00.279)
You know, to some extent, Spencer isn't wrong, because imagine the scene where you're 13 and you have to sing in front of a whole congregation in a language you don't speak with a voice that's changing. That makes you into a man.
Matt (01:01:06.356)
Oh
Mm-hmm.
Spencer (01:01:17.974)
Buh-hoo-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-
Matt (01:01:18.094)
This answer sucks. Better.
Luciano (01:01:20.789)
Exactly.
Luciano (01:01:27.527)
Yeah, yeah, that's exactly how it goes.
Spencer (01:01:31.242)
Welcome to the Christmas episode.
Matt (01:01:33.003)
I hate this so much.
Luciano (01:01:37.737)
I think he meant to say that he had courage to ask her? Or maybe he was in doubt. Maybe it was in doubt whether he was an actual man.
Matt (01:01:44.567)
What is this answer?
Matt (01:01:48.477)
I would, what we just spent, no, I have to chastise Luciana first. Hey, let me chastise Luciana first. You can go back to your whisk, but you're cursing. We spent probably 20 minutes coming over the horror version of this film. At what point do you think I want a fucking real, logical answer for any of these questions I'm asking right now?
Spencer (01:01:49.246)
Okay, Matt, let me give you the right answer. No, he was cursed by a witch. Okay.
Luciano (01:02:04.262)
Okay.
Luciano (01:02:09.833)
I don't know, I'm trying man.
Spencer (01:02:10.638)
much like a the prince princess and the frog he could not become a prince again until he was kissed
Matt (01:02:15.745)
Help me.
Luciano (01:02:17.822)
Yeah, he thought he thought he was a boy still. That's why he believed in Santa. And then he asked her to marry him and then became a man. Clearly.
Spencer (01:02:21.098)
Not thought, he was cursed by a witch.
Matt (01:02:27.661)
Why you but you really need the backstory if he was cursed by a witch to bring it home because otherwise what you're saying It's just more nonsense Yeah, it's like what you're saying is just adding on another layer to Tom's nonsense of like I believe in Santa because I was I'm a ten-year-old boy chopped in a man's body. It's like this is still all the same level of nonsense Tom. You're insane
Luciano (01:02:31.949)
Hahaha!
Spencer (01:02:32.746)
Yeah, I know, I'm trying here. Lucille keeps bringing it down.
Spencer (01:02:46.258)
No, no, he was cursed by a witch, a pagan witch. And she said to him, till the day a woman weds thee, you in Santa will believe.
Luciano (01:02:52.398)
Thanks for watching!
Luciano (01:03:02.879)
She's just poor at rhyming too.
Spencer (01:03:03.09)
Until... until she accepts your seed. No other woman will you breed.
Luciano (01:03:08.11)
Oh no. Until you flock in her tree. Until you flock in her tree. Believe in Santa shall thee.
Matt (01:03:19.201)
I think it's just flockertree, but you know, the rest of it works.
Spencer (01:03:22.878)
Until the day you flock a tree, you in Santa will believe. That's it, there you go. And then, so he, the curse was lifted when she accepted his proposal. He had to find a woman crazy enough to marry a man child. Who believes in Santa? Which obviously the witch thought was impossible.
Luciano (01:03:22.946)
Hahaha
Luciano (01:03:31.01)
That's what I said.
Matt (01:03:31.38)
Okay.
Luciano (01:03:42.286)
I think he was genuinely in doubt whether he was a man or something else. And then he's like, I asked her to marry me, that must make me a man. Therefore I'm a man.
Spencer (01:03:49.887)
You think we're dealing with like a big situation? You keep, you keep, me too. I keep trying and Luciano keeps trying to throw them. He's like, oh, there's a fun idea. Let me, let me fuck it and kill it.
Matt (01:03:50.477)
I hate... you know what I hate? No. Luciano, I hate his answers and I don't want to be here anymore. No. Yeah. No.
Luciano (01:04:03.928)
Yeah.
Matt (01:04:03.937)
Tom? Tom is not a man because he hasn't grown up inside his heart to those bo- No, what the fuck can I answer? Bullshit! You basically said that! Get the fuck out of here. Next question, moving on. Why does everybody gaslight Lisa? No, no, no. I said moving on. Don't fucking cut me off when I'm asking my questions. Why- why does everyone gaslight Lisa?
Spencer (01:04:11.362)
Fuck you. Cut his mic.
Luciano (01:04:11.663)
I didn't say that! No! Listen, Chris is not here, somebody has to give you the right answer.
Spencer (01:04:21.854)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:04:25.782)
Why not?
Spencer (01:04:30.518)
Same reason Luciano gaslights me.
Luciano (01:04:30.678)
Have you mad, Lisa?
Matt (01:04:33.418)
Okay, you're not answer- what have I met Lisa? No, I haven't. Is that your answer? You can't answer my questions with a question.
Luciano (01:04:39.518)
No. Listen. Why not?
Spencer (01:04:39.822)
Okay.
Spencer (01:04:43.238)
Let's just go through the... Fuck you. All the scenes where she gets gaslight. Obviously Tom gaslights her often. Into believing in Santa. She's like, I don't believe in Santa. And he's like, you're wrong. That never happened. You've always believed in Santa.
Matt (01:04:45.378)
I swear to God.
Matt (01:04:50.501)
Alright.
Luciano (01:04:53.162)
Well, the whole movie. The whole movie. Yeah.
Matt (01:04:53.521)
all the time.
Matt (01:05:02.685)
Assan, gaslight sir, when they go to talk about leaving in Santa.
Spencer (01:05:04.222)
Yeah, yeah, sounds like why are you acting so weird about him believing in Santa? Like why is why is that such a big deal for you? And when it's a very logical thing to be hung up on. It's very sane.
Luciano (01:05:17.162)
Okay, but wait, but you're answering when did they guess like Lisa, the question is why? Okay. All right. Okay. It's investigative journalism was what you're doing. Okay, go ahead.
Spencer (01:05:21.79)
Yeah, I'm going through examples so we can get to the bottom of it.
Spencer (01:05:30.848)
Yeah, exactly.
Matt (01:05:31.061)
That's why that's what Rob is on assignment doing.
Luciano (01:05:34.082)
You guys lighting Lisa? Ha ha ha.
Spencer (01:05:35.799)
Yeah, he's also that's an assignment. He's telling her that he's on assignment when he's really standing in front of her. No, I'm really on assignment. I've been gone. It's all a coordinated effort to destroy Lisa's mind. She gaslights her into thinking that a phone is appropriate for an eight year old.
Matt (01:05:36.874)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:05:42.214)
Yeah. I'm going on the side. But I saw you! No, you didn't. I'm seeing you right now. No, you're not.
Does Ella gaslight, Lisa?
Matt (01:05:54.005)
I mean...
Luciano (01:05:58.115)
I see.
Matt (01:05:58.197)
I have more Tom actually. It's Tom. Um, Sharon is Sharon innocent in all this?
Spencer (01:06:00.286)
Again that goes back to Tom.
Spencer (01:06:07.946)
I mean, she's an enabler. I wouldn't say she gaslights her, but she does enable her.
Luciano (01:06:09.766)
Yeah, and I think the editor, her editor gaslights her into thinking she's a writer. Because let's face it, like she takes like a fucking whole month to write an article about Christmas and doesn't fire her.
Matt (01:06:09.872)
Yeah.
Spencer (01:06:26.64)
Oh
Matt (01:06:27.189)
Listen, she definitely did not get that arc of her own time to make any money whatsoever.
Spencer (01:06:32.759)
Yeah, she gaslights her and thinks she's getting paid when it really just them keeping her busy. Yeah, that's your career. You're a you're a you're a holiday writer.
Luciano (01:06:36.71)
Oh, there you go. So, okay, so why, why do they do it? Why do they do it? It's just such an insufferable person that they have to kind of get lighter as revenge. Is that what it is?
Matt (01:06:38.625)
Okay.
Spencer (01:06:50.034)
No, they gaslight her because she...
almost looks for it.
Luciano (01:06:58.866)
Oh, you're victim blaming now. I'm amazing. Amazing.
Spencer (01:07:01.259)
I'm realizing that now. Why? Why did she? You know, she just asked for it. She had it coming. Moving on.
Matt (01:07:01.581)
Perfect. This is going well. Continue.
Luciano (01:07:10.12)
There you go. There's your answer. The gaslight hurt because she deserves it. Okay.
Matt (01:07:15.19)
I disagree. I think that this movie is told from Lisa's point of view and so Lisa makes it look like everybody's gaslighting her. But in reality, everyone's trying to help her but she's such a Karen about everything, she believes she's being gaslighted at all times.
Spencer (01:07:33.186)
Yeah
Luciano (01:07:34.198)
So you're also victim blaming.
Spencer (01:07:36.758)
So she's gaslighting herself. Like he's not actually saying he believes in Santa. That's just what she's hearing.
Matt (01:07:39.01)
No. I'm not blaming her. I'm just saying she's wrong.
Spencer (01:07:44.63)
Hahaha!
Luciano (01:07:45.404)
I'm not blaming her, I'm just saying it's her fault.
Spencer (01:07:47.83)
So she's like, he's like, he's like, I like Christmas. And she just, all she hears is, I believe in Santa, Santa is real. And she goes, you're crazy. I'm the best. I'm right to hate Christmas. Robert's alive.
Matt (01:07:48.19)
Yeah, correct.
Luciano (01:07:52.326)
I, yeah, yeah.
Luciano (01:07:59.31)
I'm the, I'm the best. Like, this is, this is like very in line with the writing in this, in this movie. I'm the best. What are you doing?
Matt (01:07:59.509)
Hahaha
Spencer (01:08:07.68)
and you know what
Robert, they never got divorced. Robert's been dead the whole time. This is what broke her mind.
Luciano (01:08:15.214)
Oh.
Matt (01:08:16.18)
This is my best friend Sharon. Sharon is not a real person.
Luciano (01:08:19.659)
Yeah It's like a
Spencer (01:08:20.124)
Everyone's pretending to shake her hand. She's a feisty black woman like you see on TV. Okay, but this is Denver.
Matt (01:08:22.665)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:08:25.466)
Yeah. Ha ha ha. It's just like a broom that you put a coat on. Like this is my friend, Sharon.
Matt (01:08:27.614)
Yeah
Matt (01:08:32.437)
Yeah. And she obviously got like a white paper plate and colored the face in black.
Luciano (01:08:37.166)
Yeah, yeah. That as like, here's my daughter, Ellen, that just weird like doll with just one eye. There you go. So this is, this is really is a David Lynch movie.
Spencer (01:08:38.407)
It was nice to meet you Sharon.
Spencer (01:08:45.026)
Ha ha
Matt (01:08:45.681)
Yeah, exactly. Now you get it. Perfect. Moving on. It is David Liddell's movie. We've got lots.
Spencer (01:08:51.626)
This is our other art house pitch. If they don't take the first one.
Matt (01:08:57.477)
Moving on, we have to talk about the star of the movie. We didn't mention him yet and that's our fault. But in the movie, they take a lot of Ubers. It comes up in a weird amount of way, but the first time they get Uber, it is a very cheap set. In the movie, we meet Pasha, the first Uber driver. Pasha is a hero to all. And I just wanna know how Pasha would handle.
Spencer (01:09:08.227)
It's a cheap set. It's a car.
Luciano (01:09:10.046)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:09:17.228)
Right.
Spencer (01:09:17.271)
PASHA!
Luciano (01:09:21.312)
Hahaha!
Matt (01:09:26.821)
the Tom, Bleevey and Santa Claus scenario.
Spencer (01:09:28.91)
Because Pasha is one of the few non gaslighters. He just tells it like it is. And he doesn't enable her either. She's screaming in their taxi and he says, bitch, you being too loud. Turn that shit down. This isn't, this is, this is, he's like, he's like, why are you screaming? What is wrong with you?
Luciano (01:09:33.291)
Yeah.
Matt (01:09:33.619)
Mm-hmm.
Luciano (01:09:36.384)
I-
Luciano (01:09:40.486)
Yeah, he says it to both of them. He's like, why are you screaming in my car?
Luciano (01:09:48.798)
Yeah, she does it twice too. Yeah.
Spencer (01:09:50.61)
Yeah, it was a clear reference to Home Alone.
It was. So if Tom if Tom gets in his passion's car, let's just play it out. Let's just play it out. Tom gets into the car and he I'll be I'll be Tom. Yeah, I'll be Tom.
Luciano (01:09:56.842)
Yeah, I know.
So, okay, so Matt, yeah, I was going to say, okay.
Matt (01:10:04.777)
Yeah, okay. So do we want, can we, yeah, can we role play this? You're gonna be Tom, Luciano, you're gonna be Pasha, obviously. I asked the question, so I'm a, I guess I'll be Ahsan. Well, no, I'm Ahsan, right? Because Ahsan's in the car, too. You gotta take the friend.
Luciano (01:10:12.183)
Sure, of course.
I, the adjudicator. Okay.
Spencer (01:10:21.45)
Ah.
Luciano (01:10:24.415)
You okay there? Back there?
Spencer (01:10:27.01)
I'm just so overwhelmed by the Christmas magic in the air. Can't you feel it?
Luciano (01:10:33.142)
Why does he sound like an aged Al Pacino?
Spencer (01:10:35.938)
Ha ha ha!
Matt (01:10:37.277)
Hey, hey, get into character, Pasha. Get into character, Pasha, lock in. This is a yes and scene, don't break. Don't break, no. Pasha would never break, you know it.
Spencer (01:10:38.71)
That's not what something pasture would say.
Luciano (01:10:40.798)
Uh, no, he is a, he's a, he's a fourth wall breaker, like Deadpool.
Spencer (01:10:43.558)
Oh, let me start, let me, okay, let me start, I'll start, let's start again. Why does it feel like Christmas is just bouncing off the tips of my nipples?
Luciano (01:10:57.224)
I see. I couldn't care less about Christmas.
Spencer (01:11:00.962)
Do you believe in God? Pasha, is your God Santa Claus? Then you're wrong.
Luciano (01:11:03.63)
Sure, sure.
Luciano (01:11:08.05)
No? Is your God Santa Claus? Um, okay. Listen, man-boy. Um...
You need to shut the fuck up.
Spencer (01:11:20.334)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Matt (01:11:22.135)
Hahahaha
Luciano (01:11:23.306)
You've been in my car for all of two minutes and I'm entirely full of your shit. Okay. You shut the fuck up or I'm going to jam this water bottle up your ass.
Spencer (01:11:33.194)
You can't jam a water bottle up my ass because I'll don't push Santa Claus.
Luciano (01:11:36.094)
You wanna try me? You wanna try me, boy? You wanna? I will jam this water bottle up your ass until you find Santa Claus.
Spencer (01:11:46.414)
The power of Santa compels you, the power of Santa compels you!
Matt (01:11:48.715)
Um, can you just, can you just let us off up here? Just pull off right here is fine. Thanks. We'll walk the rest of the way.
Spencer (01:11:54.798)
Hassan! Stop talking about your religion and back mine up!
Luciano (01:11:56.272)
Oh, who are you? Are you? You're this guy's friend. Do you let him talk to you like this too? Shut up, Owen! I'm talking to you!
Matt (01:12:03.389)
Well, it's like, you know, I'm... Ha! Ha ha ha!
Spencer (01:12:07.911)
Listen, you're both minorities, I'm gonna call the police, and you're both gonna be at fault, okay? So don't test me! We're in Denver!
Matt (01:12:12.257)
Ha ha ha!
Luciano (01:12:14.612)
Oh no, he has a point!
Matt (01:12:16.603)
And scene.
Luciano (01:12:20.531)
Yeah, that is a fair point.
Matt (01:12:24.439)
I'm the only Muslim in Denver apparently, this is not gonna go well for me.
Spencer (01:12:27.735)
It's gonna go bad. Now say it with me, Asan. Santa is real. Pasha, say it with me. Santa is real. Okay, we're getting the paddy wagons. Woop woop.
Matt (01:12:30.05)
Aren't I a lawyer? Santa's real!
Luciano (01:12:34.995)
I just pictured... Shut up, boy! I just... I just pictured a scene of Tom running away from the guy, jumping out of the car... The colors are being weird again!
Spencer (01:12:53.745)
Mr. Officer, sir, please shoot them. You heard him, boys. End scene.
Luciano (01:12:56.23)
Yeah
Luciano (01:13:00.519)
They just fucking riddled the car with bullets. Nice.
Matt (01:13:02.45)
Yeah, we did so well avoiding this for so long.
so close yet so far away. I miss Chris.
Spencer (01:13:08.327)
Yeah.
Heheheheheheh
Luciano (01:13:11.862)
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Luciano (01:13:15.888)
Uh, he'd be-
Matt (01:13:16.157)
Hey who's dumber? Lisa or Tom?
Luciano (01:13:19.47)
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Spencer (01:13:21.408)
That's a loaded question.
Luciano (01:13:22.798)
Question for the ages. Hmm.
Spencer (01:13:26.39)
Who's dumber? Because Tom's clearly extremely stupid, having his childlike beliefs, but he manipulates Lisa. So that makes me feel that Lisa's dumber than him.
Luciano (01:13:37.964)
Yeah.
Matt (01:13:40.104)
Well, but-
Luciano (01:13:41.102)
Because like he's crazy but she goes along with it. So I... Yeah. He can't help being crazy. Ha ha
Matt (01:13:42.731)
Mm.
Spencer (01:13:45.514)
She chooses to marry him.
Matt (01:13:50.57)
Oh, so your victim blamed me again? Ha ha ha!
Spencer (01:13:51.755)
I think it's her fault!
Matt (01:13:59.67)
straight to victim blaming every fucking time.
Spencer (01:14:02.799)
No, no, but yes. No, I think they're both incredibly stupid.
Luciano (01:14:10.706)
I don't know if I'd call him entirely, well he is, but like the Santa thing is more of a crazy thing.
Spencer (01:14:15.87)
I'd say naive. Naivete.
Matt (01:14:20.701)
Yeah, but it's all you're just using different words for dumb like.
Luciano (01:14:23.218)
No, no, crazy is not dumb. Crazy isn't dumb. It can be both, which he probably is, but.
Spencer (01:14:23.534)
B R D U H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H H
Matt (01:14:29.588)
But he... He's... but... Okay, I'll give you crazy not dumb, but he has to be both. He's not just crazy.
Spencer (01:14:34.826)
He... We believe his law degree is real.
Luciano (01:14:34.914)
Yeah.
Matt (01:14:39.189)
Probably. Cause he's also incredibly dumb when it comes to the social cues. Like when she's like, hey, I don't want to go on the sleigh ride tonight. He's like, oh, we're going. If Tom doesn't go.
Luciano (01:14:40.223)
Yeah.
Luciano (01:14:44.558)
True.
Spencer (01:14:46.75)
And he's like, oh, we're going.
Luciano (01:14:48.15)
Tom has to go. Tom has to go because Tom goes every year. If Lisa wants to be with Tom, she has to come with Tom.
Matt (01:14:54.993)
If Tom doesn't go, then Lisa's going on an assignment with Robert.
Spencer (01:14:57.294)
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
Luciano (01:14:59.268)
Do you want to join? Do you want to join Robert on assignment Lisa? No, then you come with Tom.
Spencer (01:15:02.774)
But also, he's a lawyer, she writes holiday articles one per month. It takes her a full month to write a Christmas article and she gets it out on Christmas Eve.
Luciano (01:15:09.75)
That is fair.
Luciano (01:15:14.829)
He works for a law firm where apparently he like, there's nothing to say.
Spencer (01:15:21.555)
I pictured Tom in court, like it's just stuffed animals on the jury. It's like it is a room. He's like, I object your honor. It's like, who long day at the office. It's like a teddy bear as the judge.
Luciano (01:15:25.11)
Hahaha!
Matt (01:15:26.677)
Yeah
Luciano (01:15:29.706)
Yeah. Ha ha ha.
Matt (01:15:34.534)
Teddy bear falls over.
Luciano (01:15:35.39)
You know, it goes like, today was hard in court. Judge Poo, Judge Poo is a hard ass. Yeah.
Spencer (01:15:41.118)
I'm just who busted my ass today. Just playing dress up. So.
Matt (01:15:46.366)
Okay
Luciano (01:15:50.69)
So I think it's Lisa.
Matt (01:15:51.057)
Yeah. Sounds like it's time, honestly.
Luciano (01:15:53.686)
Hahaha.
Spencer (01:15:53.844)
I mean, in my new headcanon, it's Tom.
Matt (01:15:56.153)
Yeah, stop. That's fine. Let's move along. Let's ask a few more questions about Lisa specifically. What Lisa job, why Lisa job, how Lisa job, when Lisa job, why Lisa money. Why Lisa job.
Luciano (01:15:56.786)
Mm. Ha ha ha!
Luciano (01:16:09.383)
How is a job is a good question.
Where?
Spencer (01:16:14.985)
Who? Yeah.
Luciano (01:16:17.045)
Where is a job? I don't understand anything about that place where they work.
Matt (01:16:22.505)
She works, they show the name, which I don't remember, but they show it at the end, because what's this, her editor's reading the website on Christmas day? Like, meh. Of her article, but she writes two articles that we know of. One is for the 4th of July, which also seems to come out on the 4th of July. But her editor is like, why are you writing these? They all think the articles are shit. And the editor's like, because we wanna sell ads. But generally, when you're advertising,
Luciano (01:16:41.983)
Yeah.
Matt (01:16:51.649)
to sell things or events for holidays, you do it before so that those things are purchased before the holiday. Mm-hmm, yep.
Luciano (01:16:56.703)
Especially for Christmas, right? Yeah.
Spencer (01:17:00.334)
Is there a job that's just writing articles about holidays?
Luciano (01:17:04.891)
I doubt it.
Matt (01:17:05.393)
I mean, in a way copywriting is something like that, but generally you're copywriting like the goods and things, not about the holiday. But if you think of like Yahoo as a website, someone reviews products, someone reviews the holiday. So it can be used in tandem, right? You come to the website to read the article about, hey, this movie is great. And the ads are like, go to fucking Buckminster Fuller's Christmas party extravaganza.
You know, to buy fucking whatever.
Spencer (01:17:36.598)
her article in no sense. Like the framing of the movie was like every 10 minutes would be like a line from her article. But every line was completely nonsensical with the line that came before.
Matt (01:17:38.689)
100 percent.
Luciano (01:17:45.591)
Yeah.
Matt (01:17:48.571)
Well, because no, they aren't meant to be. She's just, each time she's trying to write the article. Yeah, yes, yeah.
Spencer (01:17:53.506)
That's what I thought, so she's rewriting it every, like, couple days?
Luciano (01:17:56.406)
Yeah, she because she has she says she has writer's block, right? And she's like, oh, I can't write this article about Christmas where she knocked it off Apparently very easily when she wrote the 4th of July one So but because she hates Christmas, she doesn't know what to write
Spencer (01:18:08.162)
shit
You think she's on like retainer or like what's a she's getting paid per article? Like how much could she be making if she's writing one paper? Paper word. It's gold. I think maybe she murdered Robert and, and she got a lot of money in the, uh, you know, yeah. And the insurance claim.
Matt (01:18:17.513)
Paperward.
Luciano (01:18:25.39)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Matt (01:18:30.162)
Insurance claim.
Luciano (01:18:30.182)
Oh, it's her. It's her magazine. There you go. It's hers. That's why she doesn't get fired. Because she got it from the insurance settlement from Robert Dine. Yeah. But I don't I don't understand how else you would have a job. Yeah.
Matt (01:18:42.226)
Okay.
You know what, I'm fine with that.
Spencer (01:18:48.556)
Yeah, the job makes no sense.
Matt (01:18:50.577)
Well, I think she gets paid by the word, so like, what does it matter if she's on staff? You don't have to pay her until she submits some shit. What do you care?
Spencer (01:18:55.734)
How much is it? $60 a word? Like she's a child.
Luciano (01:18:59.755)
Hahaha
Matt (01:19:00.193)
I didn't listen like all movies Tom doesn't Tom is fucking vacant from his lawyer job for a goddamn month He's not making any money either. He lives fucking in the city at least What
Spencer (01:19:03.498)
I'm not sure if that's a good idea.
Luciano (01:19:11.122)
No, he takes one day off on Monday. The rest is doing it at night.
Spencer (01:19:14.582)
He's practicing court to stuffed animals. He's not making money. He lives off of a son's dollar. He's a charity case.
Matt (01:19:22.033)
Yeah, he is. It's, Assan's the real lawyer.
Luciano (01:19:22.219)
Ha ha!
Spencer (01:19:25.874)
Why did why does he live with us on does he live with us on? Do they though Unfortunately, yes
Luciano (01:19:29.006)
No, it doesn't. Yeah. The one question we always ask in this podcast.
Matt (01:19:29.477)
No, they have their own place. Did you watch this movie?
Matt (01:19:40.125)
Listen, let's get back to the most important question we have yet. How does this movie fit into the Meganverse? And for those of you who don't remember this, the child actor, uh, was it Alaa, Violet McGraw, thank you. Violet McGraw is a child in this movie and a child in Megan. Um, he was just a child.
Luciano (01:19:43.246)
Okay.
Luciano (01:19:54.134)
Violet McGraw.
Spencer (01:20:00.662)
Because she's a child. She played a child in both films.
Luciano (01:20:03.88)
Yeah, as one is, yeah.
Matt (01:20:05.661)
And she does, honestly, she's probably the best actor in this film. Might be the best actor in Megan, it's hard to tell. But she's in the running, which is scary in itself. But I want to know how these two movies relate.
Luciano (01:20:12.759)
Hahaha
Luciano (01:20:20.67)
So I think that Ella is actually Katie. So she goes through all of that shit with Megan and then obviously left her fucked up in the head as it would. So what happened was she kills Gemma, which you also can't blame her for.
the mother, her surrogate mother, her aunt. And then she faked her own identity to become Ella, the child of Lisa. And what happened after the movie is as those of us who have seen Megan, at the end, it seems like Megan infected the Alexa surrogate thing, replacement thing. So here's what happened.
We don't see this in Megan, but what happened is she makes a pact, a blood pact with Megan that Megan will protect her if she doesn't turn her off. And so really that Santa in Tom's house is actually where Megan is now. And this movie is sort of like a bridge between the next Megan movie and the next movie where
Spencer (01:21:37.922)
Thank you.
Luciano (01:21:40.042)
It's going to be Megan 2.0 Santa Comes to Town. And it's gonna be a Christmas movie as well. But then we get our horror movie in this. First person to die will be Tom. I'll make sure of it.
Matt (01:21:54.109)
OK. I'll allow it.
Spencer (01:21:54.75)
As someone who hasn't seen Megan and who completely ignored everything Luciano just said I am going to say that Megan Escapes her universe using a temporal portal and Infects
Luciano (01:22:13.679)
this show operate in the same temporal way that Santa?
Matt (01:22:16.394)
Do not use Tom's answer for Santa Claus to make your shit work
Luciano (01:22:19.555)
Hahaha!
Spencer (01:22:21.519)
And she's going to infect his toy Santa Claus. And that's...
Luciano (01:22:28.747)
I just said that.
Matt (01:22:30.581)
You literally just said that.
Spencer (01:22:31.666)
No, I'm not done. But instead of it being an evil robot, it's gonna flock all over Tom.
Matt (01:22:35.916)
Oh, whoa!
Luciano (01:22:42.81)
Oh, it's a different genre, I see.
Spencer (01:22:45.657)
and then he's gonna fall in love.
Luciano (01:22:47.907)
XXXMAS edition.
Matt (01:22:50.933)
Okay, I like it. I agree mostly with Luciano, but I think it's... I'm going in the reverse order essentially. So, before Ella had, oh, well not Ella. What's her character in Megan? Katie. So before Katie, Katie was Ella, and Ella lived with these two people. So she's had Robert as a father.
Luciano (01:22:59.227)
Oh.
Luciano (01:23:06.869)
Katie.
Luciano (01:23:18.939)
Oh, I see.
Matt (01:23:19.505)
Lisa as a mother and then she's had Thomas a father. These two clowns, you know, go on assignment and she gets adopted by another set of parents because she's in the orphanage so long she wants to get rid of the bad blood of these people, changes her name.
Luciano (01:23:28.546)
Ha ha ha!
Matt (01:23:38.889)
Those parents die, she gets shipped to the ant. Megan happens. So she is really the next film is her caretaker dying because all the parents and people look after her die. She's a cursed child.
Luciano (01:23:44.718)
I see.
Luciano (01:23:55.25)
Oh, I see. And how does like so Megan doesn't feature in the third movie at all. It's just you know, Ella then Ella then Katie and then what's her name in the other movie?
Matt (01:24:04.237)
Megan dies.
Matt (01:24:09.105)
Yeah, and then Megan dies because Megan's trying to caretaker and anybody who caretakes her dies.
Luciano (01:24:13.278)
Yeah, yeah, but then there's the third movie, right? What's the third movie?
Matt (01:24:16.561)
Yeah. Oh, I don't know. We'll find, we'll find someone else to look after. Everyone looks to look after a kid. They're cute and everyone's like, oh, you poor child. You've had so much trauma in your life. Blah, blah, blah. What if I bring the trauma? You dumb lady.
Luciano (01:24:22.836)
Okay.
Luciano (01:24:26.978)
Dead.
Oh, she's the... okay, so the question here would be how is Ella the real villain of this movie?
Matt (01:24:35.001)
I think we know. I think we know. I have one more question. We're almost at the end so it's really quick. Studio is dead set on a sequel but we don't really want to talk about Lisa and Tom. No, the universe is sound but we need a new main character. Freckles is the ideal choice. Logically.
Luciano (01:24:36.907)
I think we know. Okay.
Luciano (01:24:45.378)
Okay.
Spencer (01:24:48.868)
That, that, I don't believe you.
Spencer (01:25:01.257)
Logically
Luciano (01:25:02.636)
Yeah.
Matt (01:25:04.601)
really high level, what is this movie, the Freckles sequel about?
Spencer (01:25:10.958)
This is the sequel to the real movie. Not our horror version, unfortunately.
Luciano (01:25:11.116)
Mmm.
Matt (01:25:14.44)
I believe in Santa.
The real, I believe in Santa too. What up with freckles?
Spencer (01:25:20.822)
Santa... Jigaloo.
Luciano (01:25:20.886)
The Freckles, the Freckle story. What up with Freckles?
Spencer (01:25:26.446)
uh... well freckles much like tom develops a belief in santa claus uh... yes because tom was his only uh... the is only father figure even though he now that guy died in the horrible assignment accident uh...
Luciano (01:25:33.41)
Dementia.
Luciano (01:25:37.27)
Ha ha ha!
Luciano (01:25:45.014)
He has a father in this movie.
Luciano (01:25:50.792)
Sled accident.
Spencer (01:25:56.238)
and basically Tom adopts him.
And so he's now part of the family. And Freckles wants to, well this has to be like a rom-com too. Change this, it's gonna be a rom-com. It's 20 years later. Freckles' dad only dies now. So he's like 26. And then him and Ella, the daughter.
Luciano (01:26:00.589)
Okay.
Luciano (01:26:12.819)
It doesn't.
Luciano (01:26:20.983)
Okay.
Spencer (01:26:27.634)
meet and they're like we used to we would we you beat me in that sled race i'll never forgive you romance ensues tom has to convince him to believe in santa so to make him worthy of ella his daughter he's like i can't have her marrying a guy who doesn't believe in santa so the whole movie is about him trying to convince
Luciano (01:26:54.663)
And does Ella believe in Santa in this movie? Okay, that's what I thought
Spencer (01:26:58.142)
Yes, she's been brainwashed. But in but in a good way, because this movie makes it seem like it's a good thing. So so she's like dad, I can't he doesn't believe in Santa Claus, but I love him. And he's like, don't worry, honey. I'll take care of this wacky hijinks.
Luciano (01:27:04.268)
Right.
Luciano (01:27:15.775)
I see.
Spencer (01:27:16.566)
And then Tom murders all of them. Hahahaha.
Luciano (01:27:18.446)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Matt (01:27:19.457)
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
And scene.
Luciano (01:27:23.874)
scene yeah because I was gonna go with a different direction to me it would be like a different genre it would be called I believe in Santa to a snowball's chance in hell and it's basically Freckles mounting a revenge against Tom for beating him with illogical physics in the in the slat race
Spencer (01:27:25.66)
It's the only way.
Luciano (01:27:49.342)
So it's like the whole, he keeps on trying to, you know, do something against Tom the whole movie when he's like still an eight year old, then when he's like 12, then when he's 15, then when he's 18, and then he finally gets his real chance when he's 20. He, yeah, exactly. That's exactly where I was going.
Spencer (01:28:10.242)
I'm gonna bang his daughter. Hahaha. So bad. It's the only way.
Luciano (01:28:18.806)
It's the only way. And then he kidnaps Ella, and then Tom calls him and goes, I have a very specific set of skills. I will find you, and I will make you believe in Santa. Thank you.
Spencer (01:28:22.146)
That old show, that old man.
Matt (01:28:24.321)
Amen.
Spencer (01:28:27.653)
Oh.
Spencer (01:28:37.194)
I hate it. Matt, take note, save us. Why did we, I thought you muted him.
Matt (01:28:40.761)
No, I'm not. No, we're just done. This fucking podcast is over. Give me your fucking rating of the stupid goddamn movie Luciano.
Luciano (01:28:45.87)
Ha ha ha!
Spencer (01:28:49.267)
F, movie sucks, moving on.
Luciano (01:28:51.735)
Oh Jesus!
Matt (01:28:54.973)
Lucy, it's your turn, sir.
Spencer (01:28:57.169)
Sorry.
Luciano (01:28:57.362)
Okay, so this is, there's a reason why I never, like I had never watched a Hallmark movie or Hallmark movie, stereotypical kind of movie. This movie tells me why I've never done it and why I will never do it again, unless it's for this podcast and maybe even then I'll become sick of the on that recording day.
It this acting is horrible. The story is nonexistent. The plot is ridiculous. But here's the thing. It's still not as bad as Morbius because this movie doesn't try to be serious or anything like that. It's just a bad story told poorly with poor acting. So to me, that's the definition of an E. Like it's not it doesn't deserve it's not bad enough to deserve an F. It doesn't deserve
all the hate that an aff engenders at least for me so it's a it's a solid e for e i know
Matt (01:30:00.789)
You don't have to. Spencer, can you tell him why he's wrong?
Spencer (01:30:04.339)
F, movie sucks. Moving on.
Matt (01:30:06.657)
Hehehehe
Luciano (01:30:08.052)
Hahaha!
Matt (01:30:10.941)
Um, I would love to sit here on my high horse and give this a high mark because nothing is funnier in my life than tearing apart a terrible movie with my friends. But I don't have to because we can do that while it's still on F. Fuck this movie, it was terrible.
Spencer (01:30:25.218)
That fucking song's so bad.
Luciano (01:30:25.416)
Hahaha Yeah
Matt (01:30:28.441)
None of it made sense. There was one funny joke. That was it. Nah, no, it was when fucking Tom was all like, it was a joke about like the tables being full of pedophiles, all the booths being full of pedophiles at the, yeah. Well, you didn't watch the movie like always. Speaking of things, well, speaking of things Spencer isn't gonna watch. Next week, we are going to watch
Spencer (01:30:31.842)
I don't think it was intended to be a joke.
Luciano (01:30:42.762)
Oh yeah, that was funny. Yeah, you're right.
Spencer (01:30:44.683)
I don't remember that.
I wish. I really wish.
Matt (01:30:59.253)
television show.
Luciano (01:31:00.334)
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Spencer (01:31:00.814)
I can't wait to not watch that.
Matt (01:31:02.845)
right? It's technically two television shows.
Luciano (01:31:07.37)
Wait, no, it's one television show but two episodes. Not two, I'm not gonna watch two different television shows. Ha ha!
Matt (01:31:11.881)
Oh, I mean, that is that is fair. The you really got it. Constructing. Constructing words correctly is important when you're trying to describe what you're up to. We are watching one television show, two episodes, Dr. Who, in fact, and we are covering the end of David Tennant's run. So it would be the sort of last two episodes he has when he.
Spencer (01:31:12.113)
Yeah, I was like, what?
Spencer (01:31:16.706)
We're watching the prices rate in jeopardy.
Matt (01:31:40.725)
regenerates I believe is the term kids use these days. It's the end of time, part one and part two. Mr. Tender is actually coming back very soon to do a few specials for the 60th anniversary of Doctor Who. So we figured why not subject some of us who haven't watched Doctor Who ever, Luciano, what is wrong with you? And talk about it. So same format, we're just gonna do a two-parter Doctor Who movie.
Luciano (01:32:00.598)
So many things, so many things wrong with me.
Matt (01:32:09.074)
Spencer, is that more to your liking?
Spencer (01:32:10.146)
I can't, I can't, literally you could say any piece of media and I'd be happy to move on from this. It was, it was, it was bad. So yes, I am looking forward to Doctor Who Part One. I'm pretty sure I've watched them, but I don't remember. So I gotta rewatch them. Yeah, I don't remember the names, but.
Luciano (01:32:20.23)
Hahaha
Matt (01:32:24.469)
well.
Matt (01:32:34.129)
the end of time part one and two. You can't just call it Dr. Who part one and part two, that really doesn't.
Spencer (01:32:39.754)
Nah, that narrows it down. There's only a couple episodes. People figure it out.
Luciano (01:32:40.77)
Hahaha!
Matt (01:32:45.633)
Okay, cool. Next week.
Luciano (01:32:46.366)
Yeah, sounds good. I have no idea what I'm getting myself into, but okay.
Spencer (01:32:51.103)
Huh.
Matt (01:32:52.105)
Doctor Who Parts 1 and 2. Watch em.
Spencer (01:32:54.668)
We're only going up from here boys
Matt (01:32:56.971)
Bye.
Spencer (01:32:58.646)
Bye!