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Fear causes us to procrastinate, distract ourselves, comfort ourselves with food and social media and shopping and games, avoid even thinking about it, and beat ourselves up for not doing anything.
If we could deal with these fears, we’d be rock stars.
Let's be honest: building a company from nothing is incredibly hard. It has been for me. I started my entrepreneurial journey at age 8. Yep, you read that right....8! Since then, I've started, run and sold multiple businesses with no partners and no funding. All my life I've had to build something from nothing, and that's what I've gotten really great at - tenacious, creative and extremely smart strategy coupled with hard work. Welcome to The Do What Is Necessary podcast—I’m your host, Andrew Moon.
Listen in as I share all the mistakes I’ve made and, more importantly, what I’ve learned from them, with no fluff, and no rose-colored glasses. The Do What Is Necessary Podcast is a show where we cut through the toxic hustle and grind mindset and dig into what it actually takes to start and grow a “calm business”. Calm is family first. Calm is more independence. Calm is sustainable practices for the long term. Calm is joyful. Running a calm company is a choice.
I’ll be giving unfiltered advice every week, 10 minutes per episode each. I want you to walk away from this podcast with the mindset and tools you need to be successful.
This podcast is for entrepreneurs, side hustlers, and busy professionals with a short attention span (like me)—you’ll get quick-hitting, actionable information in every single episode. If you give me your time, I promise it won't be wasted. Now let's get to work!
I was having a discussion the other day
with a coaching client and he told me.
That he was felt like he was
holding himself back, that he
felt like he was holding himself
back from doing purposeful work.
That he thinks that he
really wants to pursue.
What was holding him back.
Fear.
Fear of putting himself
out there in public.
Fear of failure, fear of being judged.
Fear of choosing the wrong
path, making mistakes.
The fear of not being good enough.
Do any of these fears sound familiar?
They're super common and they do hold a
lot of people back from pushing themselves
into the discomfort and uncertainty.
Of meaningful work.
These fears cause us to procrastinate,
distract ourselves, comfort
ourselves with food and social
media and shopping and games.
We avoid even thinking about it.
And then we beat ourselves
up for not doing anything.
If we could just deal with these
fears, we'd all be rock stars.
I'd like to share a few
techniques that will help.
There are a few techniques that
I shared with my coaching client.
And if you practice them, One at a time.
I promise you that that fear
will quickly turn into action.
Most people make the mistake
of imagining themselves.
At the scariest part of the journey
on their journey to meaningful work.
Speaking in front of a huge crowd.
If you want to do public,
you know, public speaking.
Having an audience of hundreds
of thousands of people.
If you want to write a blog post or do
a podcast or have a YouTube channel.
Managing and a huge team.
If you want to be in a large
and running large organization.
But that's like wanting to be a
football player and starting your
first game at the super bowl.
You're not ready for
that kind of pressure.
Instead.
Football players start with
youth football, high school
football, then college.
Before they ever consider the big leagues.
If you're an author, this
means just one blog post.
No one will read it at first
and there's no pressure.
Then you write another one.
If you want to do public
speaking or do YouTube videos.
Just speak in front of a few friends.
Then maybe a group of 10
people, again, that's if you're
going to do public speaking.
If you're going to do YouTube videos,
just put out your first video.
It's fine.
No one will watch it.
That's not the point.
One small step at a time.
We'll get you more and more
prepared as you take each step.
This is actually known
as exposure therapy.
Exposing yourself gradually
to the thing you fear.
Starting with the least
scary version of it.
It's actually pretty effective.
And you can use it.
My structuring, your project progress
gradually starting very small.
But you have to take that first step.
Now, this is where we
bring up mindfulness.
When you're feeling the fear, instead
of turning away and running from it.
Or trying to escape or avoid it.
Try turning towards it.
Look fear in the eye.
Actually allow yourself to feel the fear.
We don't often want to feel it, but we
have a greater capacity to feel fear.
Than we give ourselves credit for.
But we spend so much time
running away from it.
Try it next time.
Notice how the fear feels in your body.
Not the story about it, the one going
on in your head, but the actual physical
sensations of the fear in your body.
Allow it to stay with you to be with it.
To tell yourself that it's okay.
Be friendly towards yourself
and the feeling of fear.
Gentle curious, openness.
You're able to look that fear in the eye.
You're actually transform
your relationship with fear,
even if it doesn't go away.
But standing in the same
room for, with fear.
Is extremely powerful.
In fact, you'll start to realize that
you don't need to get rid of fear.
You don't actually need
to do anything about it.
It's not the problem.
It's just a feeling, just an experienced.
Just a part of the meaningful
work you want to do.
Uh, fear comes up because we have a
story about what might happen to us.
For example, if I try to write
this book or start this business.
I'll fail.
People will judge me.
Because I'm not good enough.
The last part might not be vocalized,
but really that's the underlying story.
This is natural.
It's good to notice what our story
is to become more aware of it.
And then to start to
see its power over us.
Once we become more aware of the
story, we can practice dropping it.
And.
Dropping the ego.
The self-centeredness that is
really at the center of the story.
That we tell each other.
That we tell ourselves in her hand.
How do we do that?
By dropping into the present moment.
Becoming aware of the sensations of
your body, your breath, the fear and
everything else that surrounds you.
Dropping into the present
moment being fully immersed in
what is happening right now.
Our ego drops away.
We got to throw our ego to the side.
The story about what might happen.
Drops away.
We can't think about
both at the same time.
We can't think about the
story we're telling ourselves.
And the ego at the same time.
So the story will come back along with
our self concern or self-centeredness.
And then we practice dropping
everything again and being present.
We need to stand up over and
over again until we get good at
letting go and being present.
Being in the present.
We can do the work.
We can take the next step.
No, don't worry about.
Ourselves, but instead take
action for the sake of people
we most deeply want to serve.
So we're taking small steps,
exposing ourselves gradually to fear.
We're feeling the fear
we're dropping the ego.
And stepping into the present.
Now from this place, we can practice open.
We can practice being open
and having an open mind.
What is practicing opening like.
Imagine that you have to do the
hard work to get to your meaningful
project to get it started.
You feel the fear and
resistance stay present with it.
But open to the action of
the task in front of you.
You become fully present with the task,
opening your mind and your heart to it.
You start to fully appreciate the
beauty and the joy of the task.
Opening yourself to this
incredible experience, which
might include discomfort.
Uncertainty, fear and resistance.
All of it.
It's all mixed in with the
joy and gratitude you feel for
being here now with this task.
Doing it for the people you care about.
It's actually fantastic.
And you have the privilege
of being able to do it.
So the next time you
feel those fear gremlins.
Coming up.
And they're standing in the way
of your doing meaningful work.
Allow yourself to feel the fear.
Practice dropping your ego.
And be open to joy.
I'll see in the next episode.