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Welcome to Her Health Code, the podcast that helps women in midlife feel better in their bodies without the confusion or overwhelm. We’re two health coaches sharing real talk, personal stories, and our best coaching tips that help you reconnect with your body’s wisdom. Think of us as your health-savvy girlfriends, here to help you crack the code to feeling vibrant and strong again.
Jessica Franklin (00:00)
Hi and welcome back to Her Health Code. I'm Michelle. And I'm Jess. And today we're going to be talking about wardrobe. We're tackling this subject because when we're in this transition, this midlife transition, I think that it's easy to get caught up in feeling a little bit disconnected to our wardrobes because we can't wear what we were wearing in our twenties. That's just not appropriate anymore.
And we're certainly not wanting to succumb to dressing like our grandparents. We're not really ready for that. And so instead, with all the emotions that we are also feeling, sometimes we really just want to roll out of bed and present ourselves in life in our sweatpants and a bun. And really, it doesn't serve us to do this. And I know, Michelle, you've talked about how you went through this phase. I've been through this phase, definitely.
And I'm kind of in it right now to be honest with you. I have to force myself to get dressed and to choose, you know, buy clothes at all. And so can you tell us how you got through this phase and how you transitioned and made it to the other side? Well, I don't know if I'm all the time to the other side, but I will say I it's a lot easier today.
than it was, I will say two and three years ago, I was definitely wearing my sweats. I'm ashamed to admit like almost on a daily and my hair was like in some weird bun, no makeup, no jewelry like and you know, I thought that was just became my new wardrobe. It was too much energy and too much effort and I wasn't feeling good in my skin anyways in my mind or my body to like put anything really together.
And so what for me, I knew I wanted to feel better. And so I had been trying everything from eating well and exercising more and doing all the things that I knew would make me eventually feel better. But when I decided to fake feeling good enough to put myself together and, and I had this thought and in fact, I actually would tell it to a lot of friends. said, if you see me with
you know, a certain way, like, you know, how good I am feeling inside inside my head and inside my body, whether you know, if I'm like fully makeup head to toe, or, you know, what I was wearing, it would really determine how I was really, it would really shadow how I was feeling inside my head and body. And so in the beginning, I had to fake it. And so it was like, okay, I'm going to put this on and put this on. But then what I did is I did a deep dive into what makes me feel good.
And it came down to fabrics at the beginning. so things like silk, like I had never worn silk, like as crazy as it sounds, until two years ago, I got my first silk shirt and I was like, OMG, what have I been missing? Not only does it feel like heaven on your skin, it drapes beautifully. And so
it just drapes beautifully on the female form. It just is like the most perfect fabric Another fabric that I fell in love with is cashmere. And I know you're saying, well, gosh, that's expensive, but there are ways to get fabric like cashmere and silk and linen and 100 % cotton.
at discounted prices. One, found some things Michelle because yes, I'm sitting here thinking you're seeing dollar signs. Yes. Yes. Well, well, I would tell you is the first thing I found is thrift stores are amazing. Like in fact, this this silk blouse is from a thrift store. got it for $20. And you can find amazing buys at
these thrift stores. And then there's also some different stores now that are coming out with amazing 100 % silk or 100 % linen or 100 % cotton pieces that are actually reasonable. And we can get into more of that in a later episode. But that's where I started I started going into what fabrics I really, really like. And so once I figured that out, I went through my closet a deep dive just
and I got rid of everything that one didn't fit me well, because I was either waiting to get thinner to get into it, or like it was a little bit itchy or a little bit short or a little bit long. And I was just keeping around for like that maybe day, which never never came. And so I went through and got rid of everything I donated some gave away some threw away some and I really narrowed
my wardrobe down into almost like a capsule. And so once I got it down to just pieces with the fabrics that I really like, I didn't have a lot. And so then what I did is I made a list. And according to what I wear on a daily basis, I like a t-shirt, I like a t-shirt and a long sleeve and I like a t-shirt and a
in a short sleeve. And so I found myself 100 % cotton t shirt, both in a short sleeve and a long sleeve. And then I like a really nice pair of jeans. And I had one that I absolutely love. So I got rid of all my other jeans. And then I got just an off color of the one gene that I love. So then I have two pairs of jeans. And I love them. I feel amazing in them. So only two pairs, I probably had 50 pairs of pants. And now I narrowed it down to two pairs of jeans.
And then I kept decision making. Yes, because that was the other thing we didn't talk about in our menopause. It video is the decision fatigue is a real thing. And nobody wants to sit in their closet and just be like, what do I wear? And so when you narrow it down, the other thing I found is that I really enjoy trouser pants. And I'm I don't know if you can see, but I'm wearing one of my favorite pairs of trouser pants. They literally are as more just as comfortable as sweatpants.
And I was like, what have I been missing out on sweatpants versus trouser pants? Well, trouser pants, of course, look way better than sweatpants. Yes, and they can dress up, but they can also dress down with a t-shirt and a jean jacket. Yeah. And so I wear them both ways. And so my advice for all women is to one figure out the fabrics that you like that drape well that feel amazing on your skin. And then really the
you have to the first thing you have to do is get rid of all the other things that you don't absolutely love in your closet. And I know that seems extreme. But the thing is, is if you want to feel good every day in your clothes, having 10 pieces that make you feel amazing is a far better benefit to you than having 100 pieces that make you feel because your great pieces get lost when you have too many things of the wrong things. And so
Let's figure out your colors, which I found a free way to do it You can actually just use chat GPT, which I love and ask them to be your personal stylist and they will come back with your best colors for you. You don't have to pay $400 anymore for a color stylist. No.
No, Jess, you don't have to pay that. can do it free. never would have done. Yeah, you can do it free from the comfort of your home on your phone. And I came back with the most loveliest colors to give you an example. I was wearing chocolate brown thinking, it's in style. It's on trend. Everybody loves it. But when I was wearing it near my face, like in a sweater or a shirt, I didn't feel that great. But then I came across this brown and I don't know if you can see this brown.
but it's like a more coppery brown. And I was like, wow, I put that on. I was like, I love the way this brown makes me feel. And so that's what finding out your different colors can really narrow it down for you. So when you do go looking for your few pieces of tops, especially tops, because your pant color won't affect you as much as your top colors, but having the right colors on top are so, so important. So whether you're a warm,
color tone or your neutral color tone or your cool tone. Those are really important questions and they can be found for free on chat. JPT. And if you want more information on how I found out my colors and made my shopping that much easier,
So there's not really much guesswork about it. Yeah, you're right. So it's really just that question. But if you have more questions, if you're having if you're fumbling, if you're not great with tech, and you want some help with that specific question, the question I started with just was like, can you be my personal stylist and tell me what colors look best on me?
So that was my first question. There's the key is how to ask the question right? Yes. it's all about how to frame the questions so that you can get the right answers. Don't use it as your therapist. Exactly. I wouldn't recommend using it as your therapist.
coach or your doctor. Yes, definitely not your doctor.
So it's just kind of finding little tweaks, whether it's, just shopping for the right items or tweaking out the things that make you feel good. But the most important thing is first doing your deep dive in your closet and getting rid of the things that don't work.
anymore. Yeah, clutter is something that absolutely at this time in our lives, whether it be in our closet or in our home, our brains can't handle it. It's too much. It's too much chaos. Like it's sort through. Yeah, it's too much chaos. Yeah, it's very stressful. We don't need it. It's not that we're saying be a minimalist. But you don't you you have to think about you only wear two like you only wear one top and one pants every day. Yeah.
And there is studies showing that some of the most successful people had what's called a uniform to wear on a daily basis. And having a so-called uniform, and that doesn't have to mean the same uniform every day, but having a uniform, a couple different variations of your uniform makes your life that much easier. So you have more brain time for other things to think about, to be more productive on, other than figuring out what to wear.
Yeah, it's easier on the shopping end of things. Yeah. Easier on your budget as well. Absolutely. Less time, less money, less energy trying to figure out what to buy or spending time buying so much and less time in the morning trying to figure out what you're going to wear. Yeah. So it's a win-win on all ends. what I find, I find all of it to be completely out of my wheelhouse, super overwhelming.
And so I just do my best to buy pieces on sale or if I have time to stop at a thrift store and the patience and energy to go through the racks, which I don't generally find that I have because it can take a lot of visits and time when you're there to go through the racks. Sometimes you find gems and it's worth it. And sometimes you want to go do that or and have time for it. But for me, I like to just look at the places that I know have clothes that I like.
in the materials and they're ethically sourcing the materials, sustainably making the products, they're paying people fair wages and good working conditions. So I find those companies that I like to shop with and I just keep my eye on their sales. I sign up for the newsletter
And then I know what pieces maybe I'm waiting for to go on sale and I'll just look to see if that piece has made it on the sale in my size and color. And if it has then boom, I'm done. I get to buy that piece and be done with it. I've changed materials for different reasons, a couple of different, well, one different reason and one similar reason. One is that
natural materials do just feel better and they look better on us because they're quality. And if you think back to our grandmothers, like our grandmothers were not wearing polyester and, well, maybe they were. My grandma had some polyester pants. I do remember that. But aside from that, they were wearing mostly cotton, and maybe some wool.
Yeah, it depends. Like I grew up in a cold climate and so did you. So yes, our grandparents probably had some wool coats and those materials are just as amazing for today as they were back then. Somehow, somewhere, plastic clothing infiltrated every single space and it is, in my opinion, not healthy to wear plastic, especially for
girls who are young whose endocrine systems are developing and their hormones are coming into their time of becoming a woman all the bras now have shifted from being cotton to being basically made of plastic and underpants and socks and all of the things that are touching
directly to our skin and that is showing up to disrupt our hormones balance. that was one main reason why I decided I'm not going to pay all this money to wear plastic workout clothes anymore because it really a cheap material and they don't last. They lose their shape. They get holes and it just
doesn't look great in the first place. And then you know, ⁓ I'm wearing this workout clothing to do something healthy and go on a walk or workout. And I'm sweating out toxins. But then I'm like, they're going back in to my body because everything I'm wearing is made of plastic. So.
To me, it just didn't make sense from health perspective So after I got over the overwhelm making decisions about buying clothes for my new age and my new time of life,
I decided, okay, I'm just going to look at this from a sustainability perspective. I'm going to find places that offer sustainable materials and make them, like I said, ethically and sustainably. And that's what I do now. I just buy from those particular places that I know.
So I think that's amazing that you have ⁓ really kind of did a deep dive in all the different companies that really are sustainable and ethical. And I love it because it goes along with the fabrics that I am absolutely loving today. And so it's like, it's like a win-win on both levels for sustainability, ethical, and when it makes you feel good. So it's like a win-win-win. Feel good emotionally. Yes. And not be putting toxins back into our bodies. Exactly.
Yeah, but I think the most important thing is in telling our viewers is like to even get started in this process I want you all to know including you just to know because I know you're still in the thick of it feeling this way stealing like that It's really hard to to get ready to put that energy, going forward But I want you and all
viewers to know that you're beautiful, you are deserving, and it is your right to be able to take this time and allow yourself these amazing fabrics on your skin and to feel beautiful every single day. It is really just it is that time to just be your vibrant, beautiful self and you're worth it. Yeah, we're recreating ourselves every day in every way. And it definitely
helps improve your confidence. Absolutely. Putting yourself together and fabrics that make you feel good is a huge confidence booster. And I think that at this time in life, we really do doubting our, you know, struggles at times because all of this is quite overwhelming. It is. All of the things that we're feeling and...
you know, doubting ourselves because we have memory loss and brain fog and we're like, boy, am I, you know, am I totally losing it? And so your confidence level is going down with all of the things that are happening on a day to day basis. And so, you know, if you can start the day by putting yourself together and feeling good about how you're looking, then that is just like a little extra boost that you can give yourself to.
have more confidence for your day. And then eventually, like you said, you kind of fake it till you make it. You fake it till you make it. And it's really not, it's not a vanity thing. know, a lot of people are like, that's being, you know, to spend that much time, but it's not a vanity thing. It's really just, you're getting, you're not getting dressed for others. You're doing it for yourself. You're doing it to make yourself feel good and to, and to just show the world, you know, how you want to show up in the world. Yeah. You know, and it's like, you have to make that decision. Do you want to show up like,
looking like you you got sweats and a big bun and you know you kind of look like you slept outside that night or do you want to show the world like hey I put together like I you know I I want to do something here today and eventually you will that confidence will match how you're looking absolutely you know because it does take time I've been you know trying to slowly piece together things and kind of forcing myself not every day but you know
especially on days where I am going to go out to, you know, be in public or, you know, or when you're meeting with a client or yeah, when you have an event, those are the times where you got in a little extra push, but yeah, you gotta push it a little bit. Yeah, it's definitely an important piece to the puzzle of figuring out this whole menopause.
perimenopause, menopause time of our life where we're transitioning into our new person.
So thank you again for joining us and have a great day. We'll see you next time.