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We are Alyssa and Bri, two sisters who believe God wants more for women than we've been taught. Join us as we dive into the intersection of faith and feminism, learning together as we go.
To the We Are More Pod cast. My name is Alyssa. And my
Speaker 2:name is Bree. We're two sisters passionate about all things faith and feminism. We believe
Speaker 1:that Jesus trusted, respected, and encouraged women to teach and preach his word. And apparently, that's controversial. Get comfy.
Speaker 2:Hello, world. Hello. Just want everybody to know that I've reached that age. A specific age or well, I just shared with Alyssa before we started recording. I'm sitting, like, crisscross applesauce, know, apple apple down.
Speaker 2:And
Speaker 1:that there's no way that that's, like, an international thing. All of our international listeners are so concerned.
Speaker 2:I'm sitting with my legs crossed. And I said, in about twenty minutes, I'm a have to move this leg.
Speaker 1:I don't think that maybe it's just a past 18 thing. I don't think it has to be a year old thing. However, Brianna is aging this month. Zip it.
Speaker 2:Zip it, Parish. That was really rude.
Speaker 1:That was really freaking rude. I just enjoy when other people age, and it's not me.
Speaker 2:I don't know if you know how time works.
Speaker 1:You only age on your birthday. Other than that, you do the same.
Speaker 2:It's kind of an annual thing. That's the best movie. That is a good movie.
Speaker 1:It's one of my favorites.
Speaker 2:No, I'm not aging this month or year. Although I feel it. We were talking this morning and someone said, you're not old until you wake up sore. You can go to bed completely sore, but if you're waking up sore, that's a problem. And I said, oh, no.
Speaker 2:I wake up and I feel like I've been hit by a truck seven, eight days a week. Eight days a week.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. Clearly. Forty three days out of the month, that's how I'm feeling. I've that that hurts a little bit. I feel like that's been happening
Speaker 2:to me for many a year. Honestly, since birth.
Speaker 1:Pretty much. I don't think it's I don't think that's accurate. I do remember there was one time so we've got a really big family. I don't know if you guys have heard. And for I think one of our graduation parties or something like that, everybody stayed overnight at my at our parents' house.
Speaker 1:And there was nowhere to sleep. And so I put, like, a couple layers of blankets out on the kitchen floor. So like a hard floor.
Speaker 2:It was you and I both.
Speaker 1:Yeah. And I remember thinking, oh, I'm in pain when I woke up. And it's the first time I remember thinking that.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:But I need you all to know that if I tried to sleep on a hard floor again at this point in my life, I don't think I would
Speaker 2:be getting back up. I used to be able to, like, chill out on the floor, watch TV, you know, crafting, whatever. Now, no. Mhmm. Your butt hurts, your legs hurt.
Speaker 2:Every part of my body feels like it's made of
Speaker 1:do you remember Arthur? Yes. I remember Arthur.
Speaker 2:And that episode where mister Ratburn was eating cereal and it was made of nuts and bolts. Yeah. That's what my body feels like, but stuffed in a skin sack. Nuts and bolts.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. And I need you to really think through the things that you say.
Speaker 2:I thought about them, but I I said them anyways.
Speaker 1:That's that's right. So I know we left you guys in some level of suspense last week on, gee, what are these really put together plan ahead kind of girls gonna do next week? And you were on the edge of
Speaker 2:your seat, Giselle. The whole week, I know
Speaker 1:you were sitting there thinking, had just I need to know what will they be doing.
Speaker 2:And turns out, they've just been scrolling. They Now they're gonna talk about it.
Speaker 1:They have been scrolling.
Speaker 2:So this last week, I
Speaker 1:have been seeing so many really relevant, like, memes and TikToks and whatever, because my algorithm is doing it it's doing its job.
Speaker 2:My algorithm took a pooper. Well, I mean, it's depressing. No. Like, not even educational. It's nothing.
Speaker 2:It's like five minute crafts. Oh, How to fix your wall with ramen. And I'm like, am I back in 02/2018? What's happening? Well, retrain your what are you watching?
Speaker 2:Apparently, how to fix your wall with ramen.
Speaker 1:Are you, like, settling on those videos? Because then this is on you.
Speaker 2:Maybe they're interesting.
Speaker 1:So if you if you want that to be our episode next week, there you go. We'll do that for you. Anyway Sorry. On the more relevant side of TikTok and Instagram and all the social medias Mhmm. I've been saving stuff and Brie's been saving stuff throughout the week just to react to.
Speaker 1:I guess this is just us reacting to things that we're seeing on the internet. Yeah. Which is perhaps less exciting than other react things because on most react, like, videos. You can see it. You can see the things they're reacting to.
Speaker 2:Tell you what, guys. We'll share some of this stuff on our social media.
Speaker 1:Onto our socials. Which is mostly bad quality screenshots from my phone. So won't that be fun for you?
Speaker 2:You're welcome. These two girls really know how to work technology. Let me tell you what.
Speaker 1:We are put together ladies. Anyway, so there's a bunch of them that I wanna talk about. But there's, like, 23 of them, and there's just no universe where we get through 23 of these. Maybe three. Maybe three.
Speaker 1:Do Chatty. We talk a lot.
Speaker 2:That's why we have a podcast.
Speaker 1:But this the first one I wanted and I guess this isn't really a meme. It's like a current culture thing
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:That I screenshotted. So now it's on my phone.
Speaker 2:There you go.
Speaker 1:And it's something that Brie and I
Speaker 2:have been following all summer long. For the past fifty days.
Speaker 1:Quite literally. Not quite the past fifty days because it's been over for a minute. The past sixty days. If you've been living in a hole, there's a YouTuber. His name is Ryan Trahan, and he has been he him and his wife drove across America to all 50 states and stayed at an Airbnb on at every single state and were raising money for St.
Speaker 1:Jude Children's Hospital.
Speaker 2:I gave him a shout out in one of the I think
Speaker 1:you did. Mhmm. So their original goal was to make a million dollars for St. Jude's. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And they ended up It's eleven point five. Well, thank you.
Speaker 1:You're so up to date.
Speaker 2:Look at you.
Speaker 1:That's not even the screenshot.
Speaker 2:No. They made $11,500,000.
Speaker 1:Which is wild. Like, I have many thoughts on it. One of the things I thought now, I think it was great that they did this. I think it's incredible that they brought awareness to this. Not that St.
Speaker 1:Jude's is not something we all know about in The US, but maybe internationally you don't. And I think it's amazing that they took this time and raised this money for for kids with cancer. Mhmm. That being said, if you are international, I often wonder, does this make sense to you? And you guys can tell me, our international listeners out there, because St.
Speaker 1:Jude's Children's Hospital in The United States is a essentially a free hospital for children with cancer. And no family walks away with a bill. Everything is covered by donations, by corporations coming in, things like that. And that's like a huge thing. But it's really hard to get
Speaker 2:in Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Because so many people need the help. So many people are unable to afford treatments for their children with cancer. Mhmm. And I'm just curious as I was watching him do this. And again, an incredible thing.
Speaker 1:But those of you who are international, is this weird to you? Because, like, The United States is one of very few, if not one of the only first world countries without universal health care.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:So like, in your countries, would this not be an issue? Would you not have to raise money for this because this is just an automatic thing? And I'm not as familiar with universal health care because it's not in my sphere. Unfortunately. Unfortunately.
Speaker 1:But, like, is that weird to you guys?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Mhmm. It seems a little odd that there's so many other countries that you could go to and you would be taken care of.
Speaker 1:Your children would be taken care of. Your children.
Speaker 2:Yeah. It is kind of a weird concept. But there's other things that we noticed with this
Speaker 1:Mhmm. Series. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:So at the end of each episode, they go through and they announce any donations over $5,000. Mhmm. And when you donate that amount, you're allowed to leave, like, a comment. And he'll read your little comment, say who it's from, and then maybe comment back to you. Well, the conservatives took this on.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Like, wouldn't believe. Which, like, they are donating money. Mhmm. That is good.
Speaker 2:But it became a platform for, like, how many verses can I shove into my my comment and make myself seem very Well,
Speaker 1:Ryan Trahan is pretty openly a Christian? Mhmm. And so I think that's why this it's very clean. His channel now, it wasn't necessarily when he was younger, but now it is. And so I think they all sort of flocked to it as like, here's some family friendly content.
Speaker 1:There's nothing wrong with that. Yeah. It was very much a look how amazing I am Mhmm. Kinda thing. Let me promote my business.
Speaker 1:And here's the verse. And one of the things I actually saw a lot of was, like, a business promoting themselves and providing a verse, but then saying, hey. If I get 20,000 more likes on my Instagram page, the business gets 20,000 more likes on the Instagram page, then I'll donate another $10,000. And in some ways, it's kind of
Speaker 2:like a cheap marketing platform for you.
Speaker 1:For
Speaker 2:sure. Because you know how many people are watching each one of these episodes. Many, many million Mhmm. People are watching each and every one of these episodes. And when you think about it, $5,000 for marketing is not that much No.
Speaker 2:To reach that many people. Mhmm. So it's a it's a marketing technique. It felt a little
Speaker 1:bit to me like what we talked about last week with the tracts, with hand handing out tracts. Mhmm. And I realized also that I didn't explain what those were. So if this was not part of your, like, sphere, it might sound weird. But tracts were these little bifold or trifold pieces of paper.
Speaker 1:Pamphlet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. You're welcome. I don't like words.
Speaker 1:With essentially, like, a salvation message in it. And it would always have something really triggering on the front like, did you know you're going to hell?
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Or some of them looked like money. Mhmm. So it would look like a dollar bill and you go to pick it up and you turn it around. It's like, do you know where you're going when you die?
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Yeah.
Speaker 1:They were very doom and gloom. And that's what these like, seeing these verses on screen reminded me of a lot was here's a way that I'm gonna witness to the world
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:But not actually try to communicate with anyone around Not actually try and create relationships with anyone around me.
Speaker 2:It also seemed to me just like surface level, how we talk about the conservative community tends to seem like they're more about the outward appearance rather than what's going on inside. And I think it's a great way for a lot of people to know that you have this amount of money that you donated. Right. And look how good I am. But what's going on on the inside?
Speaker 2:I'm not sure. Now don't get me wrong. I'm happy this money was donated to St. Jude's. But.
Speaker 1:But it was used. Like Yeah. And I think No
Speaker 2:good deed goes unpunished, as miss Elphaba would say. And I think
Speaker 1:Ryan Trahan in and of itself, he was very smart in the way that he did it because he did allow businesses to talk themselves up. And that because his goal was to raise money. And he did. Those businesses absolutely did. But it's the way that the Christian community went about it that I think is bothersome to us.
Speaker 1:Because instead of like, most of them, it was just verse references. Mhmm. It'd be like, Jeremiah twenty nine eleven. Okay. Tell me what non Christian is like.
Speaker 1:Oh, quick. Google. Let me see what Google it. No. You could have actually put the text up there.
Speaker 1:You could instead of promoting your business, instead of saying 45 people's names and your 4,000 children. Like, you could have put the text of the like, there were ways to do this that didn't feel very self promoting. Deloitte. Yeah. There you go.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. You know so many words.
Speaker 2:I know. It's I feel like it's age. You know? I'm getting older. I'm getting wiser.
Speaker 2:And now I know words.
Speaker 1:It's this month. I'm telling you.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. As as you pass this Milestone. This milestone. To 98
Speaker 1:years old.
Speaker 2:I thought you were 98 last year. Hard to say. Ah. I'm so old. I forget.
Speaker 1:Right. I forgot. Mhmm. Anyway. So the next one that I have is marriage tips from 1913.
Speaker 2:I love this. The dos and don'ts for wives, for husbands.
Speaker 1:It's I would assume now, again, I pulled this off the internet, but I it looks like a newspaper article to
Speaker 2:me. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:I'll read some of the For Wives, and you can read some of the For Husbands. Won't that be
Speaker 2:You can't I love husbands.
Speaker 1:For Wives says, don't let him have to search the house for you after his day's work. Listen for his latchkey and meet him on
Speaker 2:the threshold. Yuck. Don't forget
Speaker 1:that you mean nothing. Whatever you're doing means nothing. You need to meet him outside because his time looking for you is better spent.
Speaker 2:Well, like, your whole day is just waiting like puppy dogs for your owner.
Speaker 1:So weird. It says, don't say I told you so to your husband however much you feel tempted to. It does no good, and he will be grateful to you for not saying it. Now, I I think the phrase I told you so is a little triggering. But to be able to say like, to be able to say to your partner, this was something that was communicated to you before.
Speaker 1:I expect that next Mhmm. Time you're gonna pay more attention to me, respect what I've said to you.
Speaker 2:As per my last email.
Speaker 1:And when you wanna get real sassy, that's what you say. The next one says, don't be discontented and think your husband not manly because he happens to be short and thin and not very strong.
Speaker 2:My gosh. Manliness is
Speaker 1:not a purely physical quality. I guess I'm on board with this one, sort of.
Speaker 2:I don't Short things.
Speaker 1:The whole concept of manliness to me is bizarre because it's so stereotypical.
Speaker 2:I feel like I'm very manly. I've always said that about you. Mhmm. Thank you. I love that episode of Dairy Girls, my favorite show, one of them, one of my favorite shows, where they're I think I've shared it on our TikTok, but they're going through this list of tasks and they're like, and then one of them is lawn care and landscaping.
Speaker 2:And since that's one of the most labor intensive things, the the guy goes
Speaker 1:He says something about, like, I should do it. He says, I'm
Speaker 2:a man. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And she goes,
Speaker 2:I do not accept
Speaker 1:that. Or, like, I'm the most manly of us all or something along those lines. The next one says, don't let your husband wear a violet tie with grass green socks. If he is unhappily devoid of the color sense, he must be forcibly restrained.
Speaker 2:I stand with that. These are my favorite.
Speaker 1:It's hilarious. Then the last one says, don't omit to pay your husband a compliment. If he looks nice dressed for the opera, tell him so. If he has been successful with his chickens or his garden, congratulate him. I mean, I guess These
Speaker 2:are just like normal human behaviors. Like, hey, good communication. Mhmm. If someone's doing something well, make sure to communicate that to them. If someone is doing something not so well, like dressing against your taste, how dare they?
Speaker 1:Yeah. And why would this not be like, to me, this isn't advice for wives. This is except for maybe, like, the first one. Advice for people. Advice for partners.
Speaker 2:No. I expect when I take a husband, should I choose to take a husband, that he waits patiently by the door for me until I enter.
Speaker 1:You know, I'm I'm not gonna judge your relationship, Britney. Yes. Do you? Alright. What does
Speaker 2:it say for husbands? For husbands. Okay. Don't talk down to your wife. She has as much intelligence as your colleagues at the office.
Speaker 2:She lacks only opportunity. Talk to her of anything you would talk to a man, and you will be surprised how she expands.
Speaker 1:How she expands? How she What a word, Chelsea.
Speaker 2:I thought I said it wrong. And then I looked down. I'm like, nope. That's right. Wow.
Speaker 2:She really expands. Don't assume your wife is an absolute idiot.
Speaker 1:Why does that need to be said? Like, what's being fed to men? And I I think despite the fact that this is over a 100 years old, that this is the same thing happening now. What's being fed to men that they're like, alright. I need to talk down to my wife like a dog.
Speaker 2:What's being said to men even now is that anything feminine is weak and frivolous and stupid. And we've talked about this many times. But it's sad that they need to tell men, even in 1913, hey, just because you don't have the same interest does not mean that they're any less important. Mhmm. This next one speaks volumes.
Speaker 2:It says, don't say your wife wastes time in reading, even if she only reads fiction.
Speaker 1:If she only reads fiction. Oh, no.
Speaker 2:How dare she improve her mind by reading?
Speaker 1:Okay. Just a little side note. Did you guys know that Netflix is making a Pride and Prejudice series? I'm really excited about it. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I just needed to throw that in there for our for all the listeners.
Speaker 2:Just so everybody knows, we will be having a watch party. Oh, we could live TikTok that.
Speaker 1:Can Oh, you do that on TikTok? I don't
Speaker 2:know. Yeah. I think you can go on there live. I would really have to watch what I said.
Speaker 1:Yeah. We they're I don't know that us live is wise. Do you know how
Speaker 2:much I edit out of these things? Ten, twelve, thirteen hours. At least. Good. Don't sneer at your wife's cookery or bridge playing or singing or indeed anything else she does.
Speaker 1:Oh, treat your partner with respect. Don't sneer at her, cookery. I think it's interesting, though, the the things that it's giving for, like, what women do. Mhmm. Cooking.
Speaker 1:Bridge. Singing. Playing bridge.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Well, you think, like, back to, like, Bridgerton. Mhmm. The women are painting and drawing and Embroidery. Embroidery.
Speaker 2:And that's all women can do. Mhmm. Yeah. But don't get me wrong. I know this is from 1913.
Speaker 2:It was a different time.
Speaker 1:Right. Still, like, just just the expectation that the things a woman will do are beneath the things that a man does. And so you need to be aware of not disrespecting these frivolous, silly things.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Again. Even though without her cookery Mhmm. Likely he would not be eating. Right.
Speaker 2:Actually, side note. Okay. So I had not a conversation with someone a couple of days ago. It was more of like, I was being a little sassy with my comments. What?
Speaker 2:No. This is an older woman. She was heading off to her night shift job. And I guess her husband came up to her and was like, what? You where are you going?
Speaker 2:You're not gonna cook me dinner? What am I gonna eat? Then I said, well, my goodness. Is he just gonna starve? How?
Speaker 2:She was like, I told him, I'm making a sandwich for myself. You can make a sandwich for yourself too. And he was all distraught on what he was gonna eat for dinner because she had an appointment that she had to go to before her night shift job. And I was like, kind of being a little sassy. Was like, I believe in him.
Speaker 2:He can do it. He can make himself a sandwich. I believe it. And then she kind of got defensive with me a
Speaker 1:little Of course.
Speaker 2:Yeah. We've been married for forty years, and he can absolutely cook for himself. And I was like, oh, okay. Step back a little. Yeah.
Speaker 2:But it's just interesting to me that women feel like they have to defend their husband's poor behavior Mhmm. All the time.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry. He can't order DoorDash? He can barely turn
Speaker 2:his head to breathe. What will
Speaker 1:he do?
Speaker 2:I shall continue on for husbands from 1913. Don't increase the work of the house by leaving all your things lying about in different places. If you are not tidy by nature, at least be thoughtful.
Speaker 1:You don't have to actually pick up your things, but make sure to put them in a pile.
Speaker 2:Yes. So that she doesn't have
Speaker 1:to go seek them out.
Speaker 2:She's actually gonna be doing the cleaning, but, like, don't be an absolute pig about it. Don't try to regulate every detail of your wife's life. Even a wife is an individual. Oh my gosh. And must be allowed some scope.
Speaker 2:Like toothpaste.
Speaker 1:That reminds me of we talked about bike face at one point a long time ago. And it was it's a longer story, but essentially, like, when bikes became a big thing, bicycles Mhmm. In The United States, women really took to them quickly because they didn't have the freedom to drive a car, to travel on their own in the same way that men did. They didn't have that freedom. And that's what that reminds me of is like, oh, let her let her sort of be her own person on occasion.
Speaker 1:Not that often because she has to really be at the door when you get home from work, but, like, at least for an hour a day. Pretend she's a human.
Speaker 2:Pretend she's a human. I mean, I don't think this is terrible advice for nineteen thirteen. It's not the worst It's I've ever kind of progressive. I think it's sad that you have to say even your wife is an individual. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Because so often, you just think of the wife as an extension of her husband. Mhmm. Doing the things that her husband finds beneath him. Mhmm. So that he can literally survive and take all the credit for everything in his life.
Speaker 2:But it's sad. Mhmm. Let me try to read the last one. It's a little cut out. Don't keep all your jokes for your male friends.
Speaker 2:Let your wife share Okay. I have nothing else to say about that.
Speaker 1:I don't know what to do with that.
Speaker 2:Don't keep all your jokes for your male friends.
Speaker 1:Okay. So the next one I have is a cartoon. A cartoon. I think this one is from the account Her Church, which we've talked about before. And it is based on some of the current situations here in The US.
Speaker 1:And it is a quote from pastor Joel Webb in, who is a highly conservative and also highly political pastor. And it's a picture of a man. He's at a voting machine. And he says, wait there, ladies. And the women are all kind of, like, tied up in the corner.
Speaker 2:With barbed wire. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And gags on their faces or whatever. And the quote is, we think we should repeal the nineteenth amendment because we love God and because we love women. Universal suffrage is not God's design. Now just as a reminder, the nineteenth amendment is what allows women to vote in The United States.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:So this is someone saying we should repeal and this is a real quote. Like, he actually said this. He said this on podcasts all over the place. Yeah. He said it on the news.
Speaker 1:Been very vocal about it. And there is, like, a vocal group of people behind him saying the same thing. And listen to the way that that's worded. Because we love God and because we love women.
Speaker 2:I want to know what his definition of love is. Mhmm. Because we don't share the same definition.
Speaker 1:No. Love of a person never means controlling them. Mhmm. Not ever.
Speaker 2:In the same way that you can't control God. Mhmm. I think something that scares me a little bit with this is the women who are choosing not to make themselves aware Mhmm. Of what's going on right now. Like, they're trying they literally are trying to make it so women can't vote.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. If you have a different name that than what's on your birth certificate, you have to have all this extra documentation just to be
Speaker 1:able to vote. It disproportionately affects trans people and women. Yeah.
Speaker 2:But the women who are saying, well, if that happens, I'm just me and my husband are gonna have to just have some serious discussions before we go to the voting booth rather than getting angry Mhmm. And saying, hey. No. No. No.
Speaker 2:No. I have a voice. Mhmm. I have an individual voice just like they said. Remember, your wife's an individual.
Speaker 1:Brie and I have been watching the second season of Shiny Happy People the last couple of days, which I'm sure that we will go into in further episodes. Mhmm. Possibly even next
Speaker 2:week. Mhmm. Woah. Dun dun dun. The
Speaker 1:anticipation anticipation builds. Builds. But one of the things that they said in there and if you haven't seen the series, this season is talking about a group called Teen mania. Teen mania. And they are essentially like a hyper conservative they don't exist anymore, but a hyper conservative group of they did an internship.
Speaker 1:They did, like, a a bunch of conferences. They did a political movement. It's a whole thing.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:I don't wanna explain the whole thing to you. But one the things that the people said on there was I couldn't stay silent anymore about what happened to me because at some point, being silent is being complicit. A 100%. And I understand that, like, people who have been traumatized, particularly in that situation on that show, it can take some time to work through your trauma to get to a point where you can speak out about it. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And I don't fault anyone for taking that time. But there comes a point where your silence is complicity. Mhmm. That's why we started this podcast. Because there came a point where and we both felt it.
Speaker 1:We both knew it.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Where being silent meant saying, I'm okay with this.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Like, behind closed doors, I'm comfortable saying all the things that I really feel and really believe. But I don't wanna rock the boat too much. Women are often told to be peacemakers. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:They're told to be complicit
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And to not make waves and not make people uncomfortable. And if you are making people uncomfortable, then that's bad and that's sinful. Mhmm. You're going against God. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:But I don't think that's what God wants for us. I think he wants us to be different, to stand out. And part of that being different and standing out is speaking up with truth and kindness.
Speaker 1:Brie and I were talking about this just the other day about how in the Christian community, the way that we raise girls into women, often we're raising them as the perfect victims. Mhmm. Because we tell them things like they need to be peacemakers. Because we silence them. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Because we tell them that their place is in the home, which limits their contact with the outside world, which limits their ability to see what's normal and what's okay. We limit their knowledge about their own bodies. We tell them their bodies are sinful.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And so at the end of the day, we do. We create a culture of victims. And I think that's exactly what's happening in this case as women are siding with men who are taking away their rights to vote. Mhmm. And I'm not intending to give them any excuses, but what's happened, I think, at the end of the day is we have turned we've raised them as victims.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. The next one is a some embroidery. Are you so excited?
Speaker 2:Oh my god. I love it. Some cross stitching. Is that cross stitch? No.
Speaker 2:I don't know.
Speaker 1:I don't know.
Speaker 2:What's the difference?
Speaker 1:Cross stitch is those little x's. Embroidery is just making a picture. This is a picture. I know. So it's embroidery.
Speaker 1:And it's it's an embroidery hoop. There. See, that's why it's embroidery. It's in an embroidery hoop. Oh.
Speaker 1:Now we know. And it says, in the end, I want my heart to be covered in stretch marks. And it's a quote by Andrea Gibson. And I thought that was really cool because it I there's so many there's a couple of levels to that that I like.
Speaker 2:I've been talking about the Grinch a lot today.
Speaker 1:Alright. I'm ready for it.
Speaker 2:Your heart we want our heart to grow three sizes. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I just wanted if anyone didn't know the reference. Now they know.
Speaker 2:Am I just eating because I'm bored?
Speaker 1:But I love that first of all, I think, obviously, the concept of, like, your heart being so big Mhmm. For the world that you end up with stretch marks. Like, that's the obvious of it. But I also kind of like this concept of turning the stretch marks idea on its head.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Making them beautiful. Mhmm. Because women I mean, our bodies just often end up with stretch marks. When I went to my tattoo artist a couple months ago, I was talking about how I've got a tattoo on my leg and it's it goes over some stretch marks. And I felt kind of like weird saying that to him, but I was talking about, you know, how the ink behaved and whatever.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. And he was like, literally everyone has them. He goes, I don't care how tiny you are. I don't care what age you are. He goes, literally, every person has them.
Speaker 1:But as women, we're so sensitive. We're because we're taught that our bodies are shameful. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And not perfect. Mhmm. And that's why the beauty industry
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Is the way it is. It's why it's so successful. Mhmm. Because we've told women that their very existence, the way that they come out of their mother's womb Mhmm. Is not quite right.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. And I'm not against doing things to make yourself feel confident and good, but not because someone else told you that you had to. Right. And also, you should be able to get to a point where you look in the mirror completely barefaced
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And naked and be able to say, I love you. Mhmm. But women are not taught that. No.
Speaker 1:But think of that idea if we can look at, like, stretch marks on your heart. And the concept is that's beautiful.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Those stretch marks are beautiful because it shows that you lived. Because it shows that you cared. Because it shows that you prioritized someone that wasn't you.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And that's often what stretch marks on our body are. Yeah. That you lived. That you you cared about others. That instead of worrying about what you looked like a 100% of the time that you went to dinner with somebody else.
Speaker 1:Or maybe that you had kids and you cared for your kids or whatever it is that you spent time living.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And that's beautiful.
Speaker 2:That's like the scars. The scars make you beautiful. I don't think those are the words.
Speaker 1:But I'm really glad you sang it. You're welcome. This is another one from Instagram. And it says, women are taught to compete, not connect, because united women are powerful and the world knows it.
Speaker 2:I love that too. She's gonna weep. Well, there's something so powerful about female bonds and female friendships. And it's proven, like, in business and in the workforce, women who have other women behind them who they feel supported by tend to go further.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And there's a reason why back in the day, they didn't want women to read. Mhmm. They didn't want women to leave the home. They wanted to isolate them. That's like very traditional signs of abuse, right?
Speaker 2:Is isolating that person and limiting their access to education because you can control that person more.
Speaker 1:It reminds me actually of two separate, like, media things. So in I think in, like, the nineties and February, we saw a lot of this of trying to pit women against each other in movies, in books, in TV. It reminds me of a scene in Gilmore Girls where Rory and Paris are talking. Are you just gonna love this reference for a moment?
Speaker 2:La la la la. You know, like in Gilmore Girls? I don't
Speaker 1:think that was a tune.
Speaker 2:Yes. It's like the background music. I don't I know you can hear it in your head, everybody else but Alyssa. I thought it was so corny. La la la la la la.
Speaker 2:Okay. Go on. Anyway.
Speaker 1:So Paris is talking to Rory. And this is, like, later season, so they're in college. And she gives Rory some of her notes from class because Rory's been out of school for a while. So she gives her her notes. And there's all this, like, all these blacked out sections.
Speaker 1:And Rory's like, so what what's up with this? And she's like, well, I'm totally willing to show you what the teacher said, but I'm not gonna give you my own insights because there's only room for so many women at the top. And it's just this concept of women have to fight other women
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:To get where they wanna go Mhmm. Instead of women have to fight the system to get where they wanna go. Women have to fight men in power to get where they wanna go.
Speaker 2:As our brother would say. Down with
Speaker 1:the system. Taught that to my children. But, you know, whatever.
Speaker 2:It's fine. It's appropriate.
Speaker 1:He also taught them tariffs, man. And my three year old son, to everything, is like, tariffs, man. Well, it's true.
Speaker 2:It is true. I went to order some stuff for work the other day, and my supplier was like, Hey, order a little extra now because guess what's happening soon? Tariffs, man.
Speaker 1:Tariffs, man. Anyway. But then I also was thinking about, in relation back to this picture, not the tariffs, man. The books that I'm reading right now, I'm reading through the Throne of Glass series by Sarah J Ma Maas? I think it's Maas.
Speaker 2:I thought it was Maas.
Speaker 1:I think it's Maas. It's m Liv Maas. A a
Speaker 2:a As Taco Bell would say.
Speaker 1:Yes. Anyway. And one of the things that I absolutely love about those books is the female relationships.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Now it's not to say that there's not, like, competitiveness among the women in the books and stuff. But by the end, as, like, I'm kind of in the last book, there's just this incredible, like, camaraderie
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And love between the female characters. Even the ones that are, like, really steely and intense.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:There's this we're on the same team
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Kind of vibe. And I just love it. And I I am seeing that more in the media, I think, now than I used to.
Speaker 2:There's a TikToker, YouTuber, Instagrammer, social media person.
Speaker 1:There And I'm just
Speaker 2:trying to speak until I remember her name. Drew Aufwallo. Drew Aufwallo.
Speaker 1:The one you sent me before?
Speaker 2:Yeah. She's very extreme feminist. Mhmm. And I love one of the things that she does, she goes, I never speak poorly about any women. Just flat out in general.
Speaker 2:The last are like, react to this. And she's like, first of all, I never speak poorly about women. Mhmm. But then she goes on to talk about how crappy these men are. But I love that.
Speaker 2:And it's very extreme. Mhmm. But I never speak poorly about women. Mhmm. I never will fault women.
Speaker 2:Maybe that's too extreme, but I kinda like it because we've been taught so often that women are a problem. Right. And what if they weren't?
Speaker 1:We have so much going against us at this point in the world, in politics, in everything. We've gotta have each other's backs. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And it's so empowering to be like, oh, this girl's got my back. I don't even know her. Mhmm. But I know in a situation that I needed her in a in a sword fight.
Speaker 1:The many sword fights that we experience.
Speaker 2:There's only one woman that we talk poorly about. I knew it's it's Danae Dobson.
Speaker 1:Okay. I gotta I gotta address that. So we did a couple of episodes on Danae Dobson's books. If you're not familiar with Danae Dobson, she is the daughter of James Dobson, who is Terrible. I have many thoughts that I won't get into at this moment because it would take four episodes, but a really bad person.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. He's featured in Shiny Happy People. It's quite a
Speaker 1:few times. There you go.
Speaker 2:Yeah. That's all you need to know.
Speaker 1:And she is his daughter. And she wrote a book called Let's Talk. And I can't remember because we
Speaker 2:keep Girl calling friends, guys, and growing up. We keep calling
Speaker 1:it garbage, and that's all it can
Speaker 2:Garbage, buttholes, and that's wrong. But we did
Speaker 1:a couple of episodes on it. And the second one that we talked about her book is by far and away our most listened to episode. Like, to the point that, like, it blows all the other episodes out of the water.
Speaker 2:And we spent an entire hour just being haters. And our bad. But Apparently, you guys loved it. Apparently, you loved it. I was like, are we Kendrick Lamar?
Speaker 2:Are we like this is our brand now?
Speaker 1:It's just hating? Mean, I it does mean, we we were hating on quite a few things, I'm gonna be honest with you.
Speaker 2:This is this is podcasters react to whatever they scroll through on social media throughout the week. And our reactions are poor. They are.
Speaker 1:So then the next one is, like, slightly off topic, but I thought it was interesting. And I'm just gonna read a couple of them. It's Phrases to Shut Down Rudeness. I actually saw this on my social media too, and I really like it. It's so good.
Speaker 1:So the first one I have on here is, that sounds hurtful. Was that your intention?
Speaker 2:And what I love about this is so often women are like, just stay quiet. Mhmm. Right? I don't wanna rock the boat. So that did whatever you said made me uncomfortable, but I'm not gonna react to it.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna react in private with me and my glass of wine later. But I love calling out
Speaker 1:Mhmm. The Bad behavior. Bad behavior.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And I'm not saying, like, if you're in a unsafe situation and you need to, like, shut down a situation, I get that. Mhmm. But if you're if you're in a situation where you feel safe enough to call out crap, call out the crap.
Speaker 2:I love doing it too. Mhmm. One of my favorite is, well, was interesting. And just seeing people squirm. Love it.
Speaker 1:One of the things you said a couple episodes ago was that you, like, strive to be terrifying.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah. I do. And I think that's really good because it's like, it's the
Speaker 1:same thing. I want people to think again when they say things in my presence. Mhmm. And phrases like this will will open that door.
Speaker 2:What I like about that is the more people that call out the bad behavior, the more that person who has the bad behavior Mhmm. Thinks twice. Mhmm. Before they say that sexist joke, before they make that person uncomfortable, before they tell that girl to smile more Mhmm. Before they, you know, think, breathe, or act, they should think twice.
Speaker 1:Yeah. If you have these thoughts inside your head that are sexist or racist or any of the other things, think about 45 times before it spews out your face. Ew. So here's another thing that they said to shut down rudeness is just let's keep this respectful. Now, this is one that I think it depends on who you're talking to, whether or not this is gonna work.
Speaker 1:True. Because this one may what I really the phrases that I like to use are ones that make someone explain themself. What did you mean by that? Yeah. Because then they have they'll fall over their words and realize, hopefully Mhmm.
Speaker 1:That they're stupid. This one, the the issue that I have with it is it says it works because it resets the tone without escalating. And it might. But it depends on who you're talking to. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Because there are people that absolutely cannot have respectful discussion and won't try. Mhmm. Even if
Speaker 2:you I bring it think this phrase, maybe you're right, is someone that you maybe already have enough of a relationship with that you could call them out and be like, nope.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. And then the next one, I think this is the last one that I have, is I don't accept being spoken to like that. So try again. And I think this one has to be followed by some action. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Because you can't say that and then allow the person to keep talking at you like that. No.
Speaker 2:You can walk away. Mhmm. You can say, you may reach out again when you have a better attitude, young man. Or you can say, try again and just sit there and watch.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. I just I love because this says on here, it says it's a boundary, not a fight. Mhmm. So you're not engaging in anything here. You're not saying like, alright, well, I'm gonna pick at you, and you're gonna pick at me, and we're gonna go back and forth.
Speaker 1:No. You're saying like, this is my line.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And a boundary is something that you have to uphold for yourself. Mhmm. It's not something that you put on other people.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:So you can't make him stop speaking that way, but you can remove yourself from that situation. And so do that.
Speaker 1:Yep. Just to step away. And I love the power of that. Mhmm. Because I think so often as women, we don't think about that as an option to just turn around and walk away.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. You don't owe that person the end of the conversation. Mhmm. You don't owe that person ever responding to them again. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:If they're treating you poorly, if they're being disrespectful, see you. Bye.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And women, that includes, like, when you're on a date. Mhmm. If that person is making you uncomfortable, get your booty hole up. Go speak to someone that works there or call someone you know.
Speaker 2:Pay for your own bill. Mhmm. And have someone walk you to your car. Mhmm. Or wait until you get an Uber.
Speaker 2:Like, don't feel like you have to suffer through that situation just because, well, I'm already here. Well, I don't wanna rock the boat. I don't wanna make him uncomfortable. Make him uncomfortable. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I also love to see you'll see things online about like, I was in an uncomfortable situation and another woman came up to me and said something kind of veiled. Like, oh, hey. How are you doing? Do you
Speaker 2:I missed I've missed you. Like, let's go
Speaker 1:chat over here. Let's go catch up.
Speaker 2:Let's go whatever.
Speaker 1:Or, like, bartenders will kinda do a similar thing, something like that. To see, again, women supporting women and any advocate. Men as well. Supporting women in uncomfortable or dangerous situations. Like, be aware of your surroundings.
Speaker 1:If you see someone in need, be that person because you don't know what impact you're about to make. Mhmm. It could be that person's safety.
Speaker 2:If you've been on any kind of social media, you've seen the many pictures of our fearless leader out and about, you know, on some silly little list.
Speaker 1:What are you talking about? I have heard nothing about this.
Speaker 2:There's been
Speaker 1:a huge uproar. I'm sure even internationally you guys are hearing about this, about the list here in The US.
Speaker 2:And And not the Christmas list.
Speaker 1:You know what
Speaker 2:I'm Christmas list.
Speaker 1:And who is on the list? And I've seen actually quite a few really, like obviously, this is a horrifying situation. But again, if you don't laugh, you cry. And I've done enough of that. So this meme, it just says Kamala's not on that list.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. And I love this. I think there's another aspect to it that I want to talk about too. But does it need an explanation?
Speaker 2:I'd just love to speak about her
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Some more. She's coming out with a book called one hundred and seven Days, and it's about her run for presidency. It's like the shortest one ever, one hundred and seven days. And just the impact she had, the experiences she had.
Speaker 1:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And I know that she was asked if she was gonna run for governor of California, and she's not right now. And one of the things she said is she's like, I just wanna go and meet people, and I wanna hear their experiences, and I wanna listen to them and be there with them without having to have it be transactional Mhmm. Right now. I'm not looking for your vote. I just wanna hear what you have to say.
Speaker 2:Because we're living in a time right now where people aren't listening. Mhmm. And it's time for some people to be heard. Yeah. And actually So like
Speaker 1:incredibly educated woman. Mhmm. I also saw another meme, and I don't have this one in here. But it was like, it was somebody saying, well, Bill Clinton is probably on that list too. And they were saying this to someone who is more liberal or a Democrat, something like that.
Speaker 1:And the person goes, oh no. I'm gonna have to get rid of my Bill Clinton shirt and my Bill Clinton hat. And what will I do with my book of Bill Clinton? Yeah. I'm absolutely sure that should this list become public Mhmm.
Speaker 1:That there are Lots gonna be of our male leaders will be both sides on that list. But the reality at the end of the day is that we're not seeing the godlike worship
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Of those other leaders. Like, I'm sure Bill Clinton very well may likely be on that list. Mhmm. I don't have to throw away any red hats.
Speaker 2:Don't have
Speaker 1:to throw away any blue hats.
Speaker 2:Like No. Because the issue is that we've idolized this person. Mhmm. And he's manipulated his way into the Christian people. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:And really comfortably seated himself in this position of
Speaker 1:The right hand of God.
Speaker 2:Yeah. And the Bible straight up says, you you don't have any idols except for me. Mhmm. But what have we done? Look at the hats.
Speaker 1:I know. The hats, man.
Speaker 2:He's the golden calf, man. Mhmm. We gotta move on before I
Speaker 1:start spitting fire. Alright. So this one is just a meme, and it says highly sensitive people make amazing leaders and healers. Mhmm. And I love that because we've we said at the beginning of the episode, so often things that are considered stereotypically feminine are considered weak.
Speaker 1:And I would say that sensitivity is often considered stereotypically feminine. Now that's Because it's like emotions. Right. That's insane and stupid. But it often is.
Speaker 1:And so that sensitivity is what will be used against women all the time Mhmm. As a reason to not put them in leadership positions.
Speaker 2:I don't know if you've ever met a man.
Speaker 1:Not one day in my life. We were
Speaker 2:raised. Women were raised, to believe that men are not sensitive. Mhmm. And that they don't have emotions except for anger. And that is just the absolute silliest thing I've ever heard in my life.
Speaker 2:Every man I've ever run into and I love you, men, out there. Do you? Some men, I love out there. But you are sensitive. Incredibly sensitive.
Speaker 2:More than us. Often. I'm just thinking about, like, the pain that women have to endure and the suffering we've had for generations.
Speaker 1:Once a month, my uterus sheds its lining.
Speaker 2:Once a month. We're not the most sensitive of the sexes.
Speaker 1:No. No. But that sensitivity, that perceived sensitivity of women, it does. It, like Mhmm. It allows them to have an excuse not to put us into leadership positions.
Speaker 1:But then if you think about it, if you really think about what that sensitivity means, it means a more empathetic leader. It means someone who's gonna listen to the people around them and have that wisdom.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. It means that they care Mhmm. About not just their own agenda Mhmm. But their neighbor's agenda. Right.
Speaker 2:And what's going to make the biggest amount of people happy, healthy, feeling like they've been heard.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. And imagine what that world looks like. What the world looks like when we care about other people.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:If our leaders cared about other people. When we care
Speaker 2:about more than just ourselves. Mhmm. When we open our eyes, take off the blinders, and realize that we're not the only person on the planet. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Oh, this is a good one to end on. So this one is just a picture of a mason jar. And it says, make sure you fill your life with things that support you. And then in the mason jar, there are layers. And I don't know what layers of many a thing.
Speaker 1:Like Shrek. Yes. Like a parfait. Like an onion. And it's full of rest, reflection, creative expression, solitude, connection, nourishment, hydration, movement, and time in nature.
Speaker 1:Lightly against the time in nature. I was like, pass. I just like bugs and dirt and the outside. But I love I think this is a good note to end on because with all of the difficult things in the world, we still have to be able to step back and fill our own cup in order to make any kind of impact.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Because you can doom scroll all day.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:I think that's a you're right. That's a really good thing to land on because you have to set a boundary with yourself Mhmm. And say, I am not going to consume this anymore. Mhmm. Because I scroll through my TikTok, and I get a huge amount of anxiety.
Speaker 2:Mhmm. I'm like, everything is going wrong in the world. I'm gonna die. And I can't fix it. And nobody's fixing it.
Speaker 2:And why aren't people fixing it? Mhmm. But at some point, you have to take a step back, you're right. You have to touch grass.
Speaker 1:Maybe. I I love to not touch grass.
Speaker 2:And you just need to do things for yourself just for a minute to make sure that you're okay. Because if you're not okay, you're not gonna be able to make any changes.
Speaker 1:Mhmm. Yeah. I think it depends on the woman. Some women are really good at this, at stepping back and seeing their own needs and saying, like, I'm going to prioritize myself. Some women are truly bad at this.
Speaker 2:I I think I'm one of those women that maybe takes it to the extreme. I'm like, you know what? I I deserve a little treat every day. Me too. And I'm only gonna think about myself.
Speaker 2:That's not true. I'm doing this podcast Here's the podcast. But think
Speaker 1:about all those words of, like, the things that you can do, the tangible actual things. Because I think we get stuck in that tornado of our minds. Everything's going to crap, and there's literally nothing I can do ever. Mhmm. And there might not be anything you can do to impact the political sphere today, like, right now.
Speaker 1:Not that there's not activist things you can do long term, but like, right in this exact moment, there might not be anything
Speaker 2:you can do.
Speaker 1:But what can you do to calm that storm in your head? Mhmm. And it's it often is simple things. It's rest. It's Drink a glass of water.
Speaker 1:Doing something creative. Eating. Like, if you haven't eaten all day, which often happens.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Getting up and moving. Connecting with other people. Rolling out on that foam roller until your back breaks. Don't do that. Don't do that.
Speaker 1:Bri already injured herself. She doesn't need more injuries.
Speaker 2:I think one on there could be too, like, just being kind. Showing some kindness. Bringing over a jar of jam to your neighbor. Or putting some money into the homeless person's hand. Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Like, just little acts of kindness that you're not looking to get praise for necessarily, but often being kind and doing something generous for someone else fills
Speaker 1:your cup too. Actually, at work today, I worked on a piece that was a doctor, and he was talking about the impact of volunteer work for health care professionals.
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And there are all kinds of studies that show that health care professionals experience less burnout when they volunteer, when they take time to care for others, things like that. And I would say that extends to just the greater population. And we forget that when we're in our
Speaker 2:Mhmm.
Speaker 1:Our panicking moments, that stepping outside of ourselves is often the way to to feel better. Mhmm. To feel less alone.
Speaker 2:Because it makes you feel like you're doing a little bit of something. Mhmm. You might not be changing everybody's world, but you might be changing one person's or just yours. Mhmm. And that might just be enough.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Alright. So we're over time now. Look at us go.
Speaker 2:Well, maybe next week we might talk about a certain show. Maybe But maybe not, we might forget.
Speaker 1:We gotta finish the show. I think we're on episode three. We finished episode three. Mhmm. I'm not sure how many episodes there are.
Speaker 2:I was telling someone earlier, I was like, okay, so my sister and I are watching the show. Each episode is an hour, We maybe a little bit turn it into four hours. Because we're commentating throughout the entire thing. I'm pausing it, and I have a thought. And then she's pausing it, and she has a thought.
Speaker 2:And all of a sudden, we've made this into the length of the Titanic. And we're like, gosh, dang. This is a long show. No. We've made it long.
Speaker 2:We did make it long.
Speaker 1:Also, we're talking over everything. Like, we pause it sometimes, but not all the time.
Speaker 2:Not all the time.
Speaker 1:No one else can watch TV with us. No. I'm so sorry if you ever have to have that life experience. Cousins, family, so sorry. Anyway, so we will talk to you guys about that next week or maybe something else, but probably that.
Speaker 1:That sounds like a thing we do. Right? Yep. Alright.
Speaker 2:Yeah. That seems right. I like talking about TV.
Speaker 1:Good. Talking about TV next week. Alright. So we'll talk to you guys then. Enjoy your week.
Speaker 1:Do good things. Don't suck. Yep.
Speaker 2:Okay. Love you. Bye. Bye.