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The Independence Podcast helps everyday people discover that true freedom isn’t found in self-reliance but in total dependence on Jesus Christ. Each episode blends honest conversation, biblical truth, and practical application to help listeners move beyond emotional devotion toward consistent, daily surrender. Whether you’re new in your faith or longing to grow deeper, you’ll find encouragement to trust God fully, live from His grace, and follow Christ with courage in a world that celebrates independence but neglects dependence on the One who truly sets us free.
Bryan Dunham (00:01)
There are very few words in our culture today that carry the emotional weight of the word divorce. For some, that word brings memories of pain. For some, it brings questions. For some, regret. Maybe it brings relief from a situation that was deeply broken. And for others, it brings fear. Because behind every divorce stands not simply a number, there's a story. There's a husband. There's a wife.
Perhaps children, definitely extended families involved, hopes that once existed, promises that were once made, and there are wounds that often remain long after the paperwork is signed. In America today, hundreds of thousands of marriages end in divorce each year. And this is not a distant cultural issue, even though divorce rates have been declining since 1980.
It still touches our homes, our churches, our friendships, and our families. And yet when Jesus speaks about divorce, he does something that may surprise us. He doesn't begin with statistics, legal arguments, or exceptions. He begins with something much deeper. He begins with God's design. When Jesus talks about divorce, he's not introducing a new standard for marriage. He's confronting a distorted understanding of God's heart.
That had developed around divorce. Jesus' words about divorce were shocking to his audience that he was speaking to because he's challenging not only the practice of it in that moment, but the hardness of heart that made it acceptable. Welcome, my friends, to episode 32 of the Independence Podcast, where we are learning to live in daily dependence on God. I am your host, Brian Dunham, and this week we are continuing in the series Bound for Freedom.
Where we're walking verse by verse through Jesus' teaching in what you and I call the Sermon on the Mount. It's tremendously valuable for us who are Christians, ⁓ for as we strive not just to learn what Jesus taught, but to live it out. The Sermon on the Mount is the largest continuous teaching of Jesus in the New Testament and comprises what I believe is the majority of his yoke, which is
The term that describes his interpretation of how to live life here and now while we are in this earth in relation to God, in relation to man. And if we're going to follow his teachings, then we better know what he said. So this week is week two in a multi-week series on Matthew 5, 31 and 32, the topic of which is divorce. Last week in week one, we started first with the
backdrop of how God sees relationships and how he relates to you and I, which is covenant. And specifically we looked at the blood covenant that God made with Abram in Genesis 15. We talked about how in our world we have a tendency to operate in our relationships on a contractual basis. And that there is a great difference between a contract and a covenant. God is covenant keeping marriage
Is a reflection of God's faithfulness, at least it's intended to be, and it's intended to be a living, breathing picture of the gospel itself. And therefore, marriage is a covenant in God's eyes. It is not a contract. And if you haven't listened to last week's episode, I'd recommend you do so before continuing with this one. In this episode, we're going to discuss the world that Jesus was speaking into at the time that he first spoke these words.
Because before we can understand why Jesus' words matter to us today, we have to understand what his audience would have understood him to be saying and what they would have understood about this topic based off what they would have been taught. So first let's go back and read Matthew chapter five, verses thirty-one and thirty-two, and I'll read that. ⁓ just as Jesus is speaking here. It was also said, Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.
But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. So to begin with, as we talked about last week, Jesus begins with, it was also said. ⁓ Jesus is saying that because it's the same formula he's using throughout Matthew chapter five. Here, you have heard that it was said, but I tell you. You've heard that it was said, but I tell you. Here again, he says.
It was also said, but I say to you, just this is Jesus' interpretation of the scripture. And the issue here is not that God's word was wrong. The issue we're going to discover here is how God's word was being interpreted. And that is really the whole of the Sermon on the Mount is Jesus saying, Okay, this is what you've guys heard.
Have heard, but I'm going to interpret it this way. And the way that you've been interpreting it is actually incorrect. And so, in in these particular cases thus far, God's word has been reduced to oftentimes an external action, and Jesus is constantly pointing back to the heart. And so, in this matter, when it comes to divorce, the question had become: how can I legally end this? instead of how do I faithfully
Honor God. So let's first look at the passage behind these words that Jesus is using when he says, you've heard that it was said, whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce. This actually comes from Deuteronomy chapter twenty-four. And right at the beginning of the chapter, this is Moses saying, When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes,
Because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce. So the phrasing here, when it comes to the ability to write a certificate of divorce, at least the debate at not only Jesus' time, but down through time, hinged on these words some indecency with her.
And the Hebrew phrase for that is Ervat Dvar. And literally it's translated the nakedness of a thing. And if you hear that and go, what does that mean? That's exactly what they were asking. What exactly does that mean? So, how serious does an issue need to be before divorce is permitted? And this question was still one of the biggest debates among the Jewish.
Leaders and teachers of Jesus' day and really had been down through time. But what's important is to notice ⁓ something about the question and the debate itself reveals something. The people weren't primarily asking, How do we protect covenant? They were asking, What are the conditions under which we're allowed to leave? Treating covenant as though it were a contract. And so
In Jesus' day, there were two very popular rabbinic schools, that of Hillel and that of Shemai. And this debate certainly raged among these two schools as to how to properly interpret this idea of finding something indecent about her that would lead to this certificate of divorce. And so again, the the concept was the debate was what does something indecent mean?
mean? Well, the school of Shemai associated with Rabbi Shemai, their positions were typically very strict and they were on this issue as well. In their view, divorce was only permissible for serious sexual immorality. They emphasize the seriousness of the marriage covenant. And so divorce was only allowed in that instance. The school of Hillel associated with Rabbi Hillel was much broader in and in tip typical Hillel form. ⁓
A little bit more liberal when it came to applying ⁓ scriptures, and they allowed divorce for all kinds of reasons. ⁓ the Jewish writings about the school of Hillel and their interpretation of this record examples like a wife burning a meal, ⁓ a husband finding another woman more attractive, or just general dissatisfaction. ⁓ there's a famous phrase like in in in the ancient writings.
Even if she spoiled his food. ⁓ it is important to note that the historical sources about Hillel and Shemai ⁓ have come primarily from later rabbinic compilations. So just we need to be careful not to overstate details, but the original debate is still really well attested. How broad is the allowance for divorce? And so Jesus encounters the
Topic of divorce, not just here in Matthew in chapter five, but also in Matthew chapter 19. So let's look at that. This is Matthew chapter 19, starting in verse 1. Now, when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan, and large crowds followed him, and he healed them there. Then in verse 3, and Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking: Is it lawful to divorce one's wife?
For any cause. Again, notice the question. They are debating the boundaries. They're asking, How much freedom do we have to leave? And Jesus responds by going all the way back to creation. This is starting in verse four. He answered, That's Jesus, have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife?
And the two shall become one flesh, so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. Jesus takes them all the way back to the beginning. So their their question is around Deuteronomy 24 and the Mosaic Law. Jesus takes them way before Moses, way before the law, way before this debate ever started, way before certificates of divorce, he takes them back to Eden.
Because God's original design was not divorce. God's original design was covenant. And the way the Pharisees respond here indicates something of the debate that's happening during that time. Because many of the religious leaders interpreted something indecent in Deuteronomy twenty-four to indicate adultery.
And that Moses was commanding them to divorce in that situation. So they bring up this idea of divorce as being a commandment, not just an option, that if sexual immorality happened, that that they had to divorce. So listen to the words. They said to him, this is verse seven, why then did Moses command one?
To give a certificate of divorce and to send her away. In the verb command, it comes from the Greek ⁓ intelami, and it does mean to give orders, to instruct, to issue a directive. It's the normal language of a divine command in other areas of the Greek text. ⁓ Jesus uses the same word in Matthew 28 20, and he says.
In the Great Commandment, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. ⁓ it's the same underlying Greek word. If you love me, you will keep my commandments. It's the same. So when the Pharisees say Moses commanded divorce, they're framing Deuteronomy 24 as though God established this as a requirement if something indecent was found. So their assumption here is God gave a law that commands divorce.
Therefore divorce must be part of God's design. Jesus says no, you have misunderstood Moses. And then Jesus' response indicates this. It says in verse eight, he, that's Jesus, said to them, Because of your hardness of heart, Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. So now
Notice Jesus doesn't say Moses commanded. He says Moses allowed. In other versions, it is Moses permitted you to divorce your wives. And it this is the Greek word epitrepo, and it does mean to ⁓ permit or to tolerate something, to give permission. It does not communicate ⁓ good, it doesn't communicate desire, it doesn't communicate approval, like this is a desired act or an approved act.
It communicates allowance within a particular situation. So a command is this is what you will do or you should do in every situation. Permission is because of this reality, this is what you're allowed to do. Jesus is saying Moses did not establish divorce as God's ideal. Moses is regulating divorce because humanity's sin created a situation that required regulation.
He didn't command it. He permitted it. And notice the reason why Jesus says it was permitted. Because of your hardness of heart. Not because of something indecent about her, but rather something is wrong with you. Your hardness of heart. The reason divorce existed was not because marriage was flawed.
The reason divorce existed because human hearts were. The problem is not God's design, it's human sin. The problem is not any issue with covenant, it's human tendency to break it. So the Pharisees say Moses commanded. Jesus says, no, no, no. Moses permitted. The Greek words here matter. The Pharisees used the language of obligation, but Jesus uses the language of concession.
Moses did not command divorce because divorce was God's design. Moses permitted divorce because human hearts had become hardened. It was not God's ideal. It was ⁓ the regulation of human brokenness. We see this in other in other contexts. God's original design was for them to be a theocracy, Israel. Like he was to be their king. God was their king. They weren't going to have a human king. And that was going to be one thing that separated them from the other nations of the world. But
Is that what wound up happening? God's original design was for Israel not to have a human king, but that he would be their king. But what happened? Because of their stubborn hearts, he allowed them to have a king. And then he gives them instructions on how that relationship should work. Not one he wanted, but how to sinful hearts navigate the world they've created in a way that limits the damage.
And that's for the that's the reason for the instruction. Same thing here. Divorce is not a part of God's original design, but because sin exists, because human hearts are broken, God gives allowances and instructions that restrain evil and protect people. And that's what's happening in Deuteronomy 24. Moses is not saying this is God's desire for marriage. He's saying when brokenness happens, there are boundaries that prevent greater harm.
And that's the reason behind the language of certificate of divorce. ⁓ the reason Moses requires that is not because they just needed documentation of the fact. ⁓ in in the ancient world, divorce was not simply a, you know, a private decision, largely like it is today. It it it definitely had legal, financial, and social consequences. A woman who was dismissed by her husband without documentation could be left very vulnerable in this society.
She could face accusations, have difficulty remarrying. Like, know that in Moses' day, adultery, you know, breaking that covenant through sexual immorality was not ⁓ just a legal reason to divorce. It was punishable by death. It was a capital offense. Now it by Jesus' day, th they didn't have because they were being ruled by Rome, they didn't have the authority to condemn anybody in that in that way. So divorce was handled very differently. But
⁓ back in this day, like the certificate of divorce would have protected the woman and given her a lot of social protections and just gave legal clarity. So just announcing this woman's no longer bound by this marriage, it protected her from being treated as though she was still married while her husband had already abandoned the relationship. And this reveals something important about God and and what he institutes. That even when God is regulating the consequences of human sin, he's still protecting people.
So let's go back to this idea of hardness of heart as the reason that Moses permitted divorce again. They say they're debating, well, what does indecency mean? Like something indecent about her, that gives me permission to divorce. Or even in some cases, they would say God commands divorce in this situation. And Jesus is saying, nope, it's not a command. It is permission. And it is permission, not because of something indecent about her, but ultimately because.
Something indecent about you because of your hard heart. The Greek word for hardness of heart i is a combination of two words. ⁓ the the compound word sclerocardia, it comes from two Greek words scleros, which means hard or stubborn, and then cardia, which means heart. It and it's not just like when you when I think of stubbornness, I think of somebody who just doesn't back down from an argument or is very reluctant to do so, even
You know, if they if there might be a better way. hardness of heart though in biblical language describes resistance towards God. So Jesus is saying divorce exists not because God's design failed, but because human hearts rebel against God's design and authority. So hardness of heart ⁓ is a heart that says, I want my way. I want what I want. I want my desires. I want my freedom.
Even if somebody else is gets wounded by this. And this connects directly with everything Jesus has been teaching in the Sermon on the Mount. Jesus has already addressed anger as the root issue, as the heart issue behind murder. Lust is the root or heart issue behind adultery. Now he's addressing divorce. And every time Jesus has talked so far about these ⁓ commandments that he's reinterpreting.
He's going deeper, not just in merely addressing external behavior, but he is addressing the heart. So ⁓ in this case, Jesus isn't overturning what Moses said. He's exposing and correcting a misuse of what is being said here. They have taken a concession and turned it into a commandment. They take something that God allowed and are now using it as permission to sin. And the Pharisees
You know.
They're taking this idea of what Moses had regulated, Moses' permission to regulate the brokenness and protect people and treating it as though this is how God designed it to be. So important to remember, Jesus is not just some other rabbi entering this debate. He speaks with divine authority. The people in this question, when the Pharisees approached Jesus.
Are are essentially asking him, Are you with Hillel, are you with Shemmai? They're expecting him to choose a side. Instead, he goes deeper. He goes behind the debate and goes back to creation when he says, Have you not read that the one who created from the beginning made the male and female? Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate. Jesus doesn't begin with divorce, he begins with God's design. So the question Jesus forces us to ask is not simply what are the legal grounds for divorce? The question is, what kind of heart?
Am I cultivating before God? Because a hard heart always looks for the minimum requirement. But a surrendered heart asks, Lord, how do I reflect your character? A hard heart asks, how close can I get to the edge? A surrendered heart asks, how faithfully can I love?
So
For this episode, I just want you to recognize last episode is God relates to us in covenant. Marriage is a covenant. Here, in Jesus' day, the reason his words would have ⁓ been so shocking to them in some ways is he's reframing the debate that's happening. They're asking, How do I get out of this? Or didn't Moses command this to be the case?
And he's saying this was never a command of God, and it is not God's design. This is permission that has been given as a result of human brokenness to navigate that appropriately. So they would have understood it to ⁓ be either one of two things. I can divorce my wife for almost any reason, even if there's nothing wrong with her, if I find someone else more attractive, but that's hillel. Or it's
Only sexual immorality. That's it. That's the only reason I can divorce my wife. And Jesus is saying, you guys are still looking at the external ramifications of something, but I want to take you back way before all of this, Moses, way before Deuteronomy, all the way back to the beginning. It was never intended to be this way. You need to get it framed up in your mind that God's design never included anything to do with divorce.
So as we continue this series, I just want to remember something really important. Jesus isn't speaking about divorce because he wants to shame broken people. He's speaking about divorce because he wants to reveal the beauty of the covenant of God's original design. God cares about marriage because God cares about faithfulness. And he cares about the reflection of that marriage being a reflection of his faithfulness and covenant.
To us. And yet at the same time, the God who calls us to faithfulness is the God who offers forgiveness when we fail. The gospel is not the story of perfect people keeping perfect promises. The gospel is the story of a faithful God who keeps his promises to imperfect people. In the next episode, we're going to move deeper into Jesus' words themselves. We're going to examine
The Greek words behind Matthew 5, 31 and 32. We've touched on a couple of them as it related to the point of each episode, but next week we're going to go deep on all of them and specifically what is this language about causing someone else to become an adulterer. So more on that next week. If you have found this episode helpful, please share with a friend and follow the show. Until next week, grace and peace, my friend.