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For over 25 years Proverbs 31 Ministries' mission has been to intersect God's Word in the real, hard places we all struggle with. That's why we started this podcast. Every episode will feature a variety of teachings from president Lysa TerKeurst, staff members or friends of the ministry who can teach you something valuable from their vantage point. We hope that regardless of your age, background or stage of life, it's something you look forward to listening to each month!
Kaley Olson:
Well, hey, guys. Welcome to The Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast, where we share biblical Truth for any girl in any season. I'm your host, Kaley Olson. I'm here with my co-host for today, Meghan Ryan.
Meghan Ryan:
Hey, happy to be here.
Kaley Olson:
Hey, Meghan. I know. And our teacher for the day, Wendy Blight. Welcome, Wendy.
Wendy Blight:
Yeah, hello. Oh, I'm so happy to be back. Thank you for inviting me.
Kaley Olson:
And welcome to all of our YouTube friends watching too.
Meghan Ryan:
Yes. If you're just joining us, we are at the end of a four-part series that we've done on prayer. And so, if you have missed the last couple of episodes, we just want to fill you in real quick. I recommend you pause and go back to listen to them.
Kaley Olson:
Right?
Meghan Ryan:
In Episode one, we had a great conversation about some of the ways that we maybe misunderstand what prayer is, how we might overcomplicate it when maybe it's just not that complicated. In the second episode, we talked about what it means to ask and who God is. Who is that we're asking for things in prayer?
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Meghan Ryan:
And then in our last episode we talked about what do we do with the disappointment and grief that comes when our prayers don't get answered? And how do we wade through that? And so, it's been a really great series, but we're excited for today's episode too.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah, for sure. So, Wendy, not only are you our Biblical Content Specialist here at Proverbs who ... I mean, I don't know about you, Meghan, but I go to Wendy on the reg with questions.
Meghan Ryan:
Yes, or just prayer.
Kaley Olson:
Literally.
Meghan Ryan:
I need prayers —
Kaley Olson:
Yes.
Meghan Ryan:
— Who is the first person I'm going to text and ask for prayer? It's Wendy.
Kaley Olson:
I know. And we've had her on the podcast a lot of times before to talk about prayer, but today we're here because we know you're the author of several books. And one of the books that you've written recently is called Rest for Your Soul. And it covers your journey through anxiety and how you quite literally found true rest for your soul through practices like prayer, solitude and silence that combat your anxiety. And so, we thought it would be a great way to round out this series.
And so, I can't wait to hear what you have to share with us today.
Wendy Blight:
Thank you. I'm excited. Are you ready?
Kaley Olson:
Yes.
Meghan Ryan:
So ready.
Wendy Blight:
All right. I'm going to pray because you know me. The prayer has to come.
Meghan Ryan:
Great, yes.
Wendy Blight:
Father, all I've been doing is thinking about who would be listening to this on the other side one day. And so, I've just asked for this to just be your divine appointment, my friend, that you would know God sees you. He knows what you're walking through, He hears you, He sees your tears, and He brought you here so that the three of us could just be His Word opened up to you, manna to feed your soul and know that everything will be OK. So, please be with us, Holy Spirit, in Jesus' name, amen.
Meghan Ryan:
Amen.
Kaley Olson:
Amen.
Wendy Blight:
So, I thought I'd begin today [by] sharing how “be still” time, and then what I'm going to talk about along with that with prayer, really went from something I read the words in the Bible and in books, and then they became the lifeline that I feel like saved my life. And we're going to process what be still time is and then we're going to marry it with prayer. So, we're going to walk through some steps together.
But I can say — from having done the podcast through the years — we know that anxiety and feeling overwhelmed is prevalent among women today. Right? I'm sure you have been talking about that. And so, I thought I would open by sharing my story just so you can know where I'm coming from and how the be still time or what I came to call “sacred pauses,” combined with prayer, became medicine really for my soul during that time and just pulled me out of what I like to call “paralyzing anxiety” that hijacked my life. Because I just felt like I went from one space to the next, and I don't even know how I got there in the middle.
But during that time, these words, this was my prayer every day: Lord, please settle my unsettled soul, because I could never feel normal. I lived every day with this unceasing unsettledness. And I didn't want to feel it. I didn't want to deal with it. I didn't want to talk about it because you know what? I just thought it would go away. Right?
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
That's kind of what you feel like. If you can ignore something, it'll eventually go away.
But they eventually landed me in a place that was really terrifying for me because I just started to not leave my house. And I wouldn't go to any events. And whether it was a party or a shower or a wedding or my family going out to dinner, I didn't want to leave to go to a restaurant or anywhere. Grocery stores made me feel like the walls were closing in on me. So, I just stayed home. And I couldn't sleep. And every little task that was asked of me, or I even had to think of doing, overwhelmed me.
And then, physically I had all these chronic pains in my body everywhere. So, then my obsessive thinking was, Uh oh. I have this; I have that. What's wrong with me?
And all of it led to just hopelessness and helplessness. And I never gave my body time to rest or recalibrate or refocus because I couldn't. I didn't know how to do that.
And so, before we begin, I want to begin with some be still time with us if that's OK with y'all.
Kaley Olson:
Yes, that's great.
Wendy Blight:
So, what I'm going to do is first say to our friend: When was the last time you were still? And I'm going to look at both of you too. When was the last time you were still? And when I say that, no outside noise, no chaos around you, no to-do lists just going round and round in your head of everything you have to do.
And I'm probably going to guess. And you've got a child, a young child.
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah, who is not still.
Wendy Blight:
Yeah, never still. My guess is, though, it's been a while. And so we're going to do it because this is how important it is to me that we just take time to do this.
I'm going to ask who's listening to close your eyes if you're able. But if not, you can still do it.
Meghan Ryan:
I'm going to do it, yes.
Wendy Blight:
Not if you're driving.
Kaley Olson:
I'm going to do it too.
Meghan Ryan:
And I'll start. OK.
Wendy Blight:
But I'm going to ask you to take three deep breaths first. And I'm going to ask you to count to four in and seven out with each breath. And when you do it, I want you to think of breathing in the Holy Spirit and breathing out whatever's worrying you. And then I'm going to pause for a second, and I'm going to be read three verses from a passage. One, two, three. And then I'm going to give you a pause in between. So, are you ready?
Meghan Ryan:
I'm ready.
Wendy Blight:
All right. Take your breaths. Start now.
Be still, my daughter. Be still and know, my daughter. Be still and know that I am God.
OK, when I immersed myself in these words, they were like power-packed words when I really started to immerse myself in them. And I learned the incredible significance that God places on being still because we see it throughout Scripture. And that's just taking time every day, in the beginning, if you're in this place, every day to take these pauses. And so, where's the best place to go when we're trying to understand what a word means in Scripture, right? Go directly to Scripture.
We're going to go to Psalm 46. And y'all know when we teach from a passage, we give context. So, I want to give a little context to it, which means we're going to look at who wrote it real quickly, why they wrote it, and who they were writing to, and what was going on. Scholars believe Psalm 46 was written by priests who were called the Sons of Korah, serving during King David's time. And what was going on around them was war. The unbelieving nations were at war with the Israelites. So, I'm going to read portions of it right now. You can close your eyes; you can just listen. But I want you to listen for the “be still” word when you hear it, but also words that speak to your heart where you are right now.
"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging ... Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts. The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Come and see what the LORD has done, the desolations he has brought on the earth. He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth. He breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the shields with fire. He says, ‘Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.’ The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress" (Psalm 46, NIV).
So, when I read that at that time in my life, I was drawn to the “be still” words. And that word in Hebrew is raphah. And here's what it means: relax, sync, withdraw, release. Relax, sync, withdraw, release. I don't know about you, but that sounds real good.
Meghan Ryan:
Yes.
Wendy Blight:
And then I want to say that's not my personality ... is not to be still, to be quiet and do those things.
Kaley Olson:
No.
Wendy Blight:
So, then we notice the next word. It says to be still and know. That word is yada. Well, that word means cease striving, surrender and acknowledge. It doesn't mean gather information here. Do you see what I'm saying? It's different. It's cease striving. It's surrender. That makes me go, OK, God, I like these words: release, withdraw, surrender, and cease striving.
But there's a little bit more because it's be still and know what?
Kaley Olson:
That I am God.
Wendy Blight:
That I am God.
So, there is some knowledge in knowing it. It's called “active stillness,” right? Not passive stillness. You're releasing and stuff, but you're learning. And what you're learning is a deeper understanding of who God is. That's the purpose of this be still time these priests are talking about.
And so, when we remind ourselves of this, we can think back to the priests of Korah and what they were saying and why they were saying it. They were saying it to the people at the time that were in the middle of this war. And it was terrifying, and their wives were losing husbands, and children were losing fathers. And it's because they needed to be reminded of those words — that God is their refuge, their strength, their ever-present help, their most high God.
And so, what it said to me is that in the stillness, that's where we step into God's nearness. That's the purpose. In this stillness, step into God's nearness. And this is where prayer comes in, our conversation.
If we think of prayer, it's Philippians 4:6-7, like a verse everyone thinks of, right?
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
And that verse says, "Do not be anxious about anything. Pray about everything with thanksgiving. Make your request known to God. The peace that passes all understanding will guard your heart and mind." Lots of people know that.
Kaley Olson:
It sounds like such a happy ... like, Oh, it's so simple.
Wendy Blight:
Yeah.
Kaley Olson:
It's not.
Wendy Blight:
Oh, it does.
Kaley Olson:
No, it's not simple.
Wendy Blight:
It's like, "Oh, here's a formula. Pray it."
Kaley Olson:
Right.
Wendy Blight:
And it's not. But what we miss is, go to verse 5. The last four words right before God says to pray about everything, it says, "The Lord is near" (Philippians 4:5, NIV). And I find that incredibly powerful because He's saying, “Before I'm asking you to go do what sounds impossible, remember, I'm here. I'm near and I'm with you."
I was in overwhelming anxiety. A friend of mine had lost a baby. All these things ... if we receive a diagnosis we don't understand, if someone's walked out on us or betrayed us, we've lost a dream, whatever it is, we can know that when we go to God with that formulaic Philippians 4:6-7; in verse 5 He's reminding us He's near.
And so, that gave me such peace. For some reason, those words gave me such peace. But what happens when we do that? We realize He's near but our prayer isn't answered. Right? For me, I was in that anxiety, and I did all these things. So, what happens? And that's where I found myself. Prayer is hard.
And so, what I want to show you is tell you a story that happened decades ago to show another time when I was in unanswered prayer. But it was about fear and how God showed me that He was there.
Four decades ago ... Not four. Maybe? I don't know. Not that long ago, but 28 years ago ... how's that?
Meghan Ryan:
That sounds great.
Wendy Blight:
I walked into my apartment to find an armed, masked man. And the events of that day literally brought me to a crisis of faith. And all I wanted was a sign from God, anything, that He was there because I couldn't understand how He could sit on His throne and watch what happened to someone who called himself God's child, right? I wanted to know: "Wendy, I hear you. I haven't forgotten you. Just take these steps, say these verses, and I will make everything be better."
But I didn't hear anything.
And I have to say after a while, that day caused me to doubt God and His love and who He was because I heard nothing all the time. And I felt, Why won't You intervene? And why did You watch that happen to me? And I just felt like I heard nothing. And the hours turned into days, and the days turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months, and the months turned into years.
And you know what? Through those years, I did have some good days when I was around people who built me up and all of that. But overall, for 12 years, I was angry with God and I doubted Him. And I really felt like He wasn't the God that I heard all about at Baylor University; that's where I went to school.
But 28 years later, I was speaking at a women's event in Houston, Texas. And God showed me in a way that I could never have imagined that He had been there during that time. And it was through this sweet woman named Elaine who just came up for prayer after I gave my testimony. And she came up and told me that she was in a small group in a church and their pastor had told them that a young woman had been attacked at Baylor and he assigned their group to pray for this woman. And so, they began to pray a scripture that I'm going to read you portions of; Isaiah 62:1-4 is the scripture.
It says this, "For Zion's sake I will not keep silent, And for Jerusalem's sake I will not keep quiet, Until her righteousness goes forth like brightness, And her salvation like a torch that is burning. The nations will see your righteousness, And all kings your glory; And you will be called by a new name, Which the mouth of the LORD will designate. You will also be a crown of beauty in the hand of the LORD, And a royal headband in the hand of your God. It will no longer be said to you, ‘Forsaken,’ Nor to your land will it any longer be said, ‘Desolate’; But you will be called, ‘My delight is in her,’ ... For the LORD delights in you ..." (Isaiah 62:1-4, NASB).
Now, I'm going to be honest. If someone had told me that they were praying that verse for me all those years ago, I would've gone, "I don't even understand what that verse is about." It's from the Old Testament. It's about Jerusalem. And why would that be prayed for me?
And then she texted her husband to send a screenshot of her Bible open to that passage. And written on that yellow page next to that passage was my name and the year 1986.
And, y'all, when she came to the conference, she didn't know who I was because my last name was different. I was traveling with Lisa Allen. We were coming from Charlotte, North Carolina. She didn't know until she heard my testimony and then when she heard that word “forsaken.” And she texted her husband again and she said, "Go find my journal from 1986," because she's like this prayer warrior so she has journals upon journals, and they're all dated. Within about two hours, she brought that screenshot to me, y'all.
And this was her personal prayer that she prayed for me, every week once a week: God, for Wendy's sake, I will not keep silent. And for her soul, I will not keep quiet, until Wendy's righteousness goes forth like brightness and her salvation is like a torch that is burning. The nations will see Wendy's righteousness, and everyone will see her glory, and Wendy will be called by a new name the mouth of the Lord will designate. She will be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord and a royal diadem in the hand of God. It will no longer be said of, about, or by her that she is forsaken, nor will her soul or her spirit be called desolate. But she will be called my delight is in her, and God will rejoice over Wendy, and she will be glad.
So, she took that Old Testament verse and just prayed and put my name in it. And I realized not only had God not forgotten me, but He had appointed this group of people to pray for me when I was doubting Him. And honestly, times where I shook my fist and said, "I hate You, and I don't believe in You anymore," and that's the truth. That's how I felt about God. And so I stood amazed then and I stand amazed now that God would pull back the veil between me and heaven and show me what was going on and that He cared enough, that He just cared enough, because He didn't have to show me that.
And so, I just want our friends to know that God is faithful to His Word even when we can't see it or feel it. And so maybe you're wondering if God hears your prayers, and you want to change things and want everything to be over. But you can't and it isn't. So, if you're there, which I know you are, because, friend, it's a divine appointment while you're here, hear these words and let them sink in. Jesus is near and He's as near as your next breath, and you need only be still and call on His name — Jesus. And He invites you, "Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28, NASB).
And that's what we're talking about today.
And He may not fix everything at the moment, and He probably won't. He doesn't usually. But it's an invitation to come and be still with the only One who can do it. In the middle of our mess, in the middle of our pain and our doubt, everything, He's the only One.
But it's all about accepting that invitation to be still, y'all. It's all about being with Him in prayer. And what does it look like? And we're going to get practical now.
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
I'm going to give you some truths. I'm going to give you some promises. And I'm going to give you some reminders to pray. And there's not one correct way to pray here. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying this worked for me, and I've seen it work for other people.
And so praying ... I want to remind you of some things. First, remember you're praying to the
God who formed you and shaped you, right? He is your Abba Father, and He calls you by name. He created you in your mother's womb. He knows everything about you. Second, you're praying in the very name of God's Son who saved and redeemed you. You aren't simply reciting the name Jesus. You're praying in accordance with what that name carries and the power that accompanies that name.
And third, you pray in faith. And what does that mean? Romans 10:17 says, "Faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ" (NIV). So, what is that saying? The verse is clear. The more time you spend in the Bible — that's the Word about Christ — the more time you spend in God's Word, the more your faith will increase. And the more your faith increases, the more faith-filled your prayers will be. It just happens. So, we pray to God in Jesus' name in faith.
Then what do we do?
We do what Elaine and her friends did. We pray according to God's Word. Max Lucado says this — one of our Proverbs favorites ever —
Meghan Ryan:
Right.
Wendy Blight:
— We've done almost all his books. Well, we couldn't do all of his. It is so many. But he says this: "God invites you. Find a promise that fits your problem; build your prayer around it. These prayers of faith touch the heart of God and activate the angels of heaven. Miracles are set in motion. Your answer may not come overnight, but it will come, and you will overcome."
OK, so now I'm going to read you Isaiah 55:10-11. And I want you to think of a seed as I read this. "As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish" — through the seed, right? — "it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater." And then the prophet Isaiah compares God's Word to that seed. "So is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it" (NIV).
So, praying God's Word is what activates the living and active, Hebrews 4:12, living and active Word that it is. And it does it in such a way that, when we pray it in faith, it will conform our prayers to God's will. Because where do we find His will?
Kaley Olson:
In His Word.
Wendy Blight:
In His Word. So, we pray to God in Jesus' name in faith according to God's Word. And then we're to pray with confidence, right? We're children of God. Romans 10:17, "Faith comes from hearing the message" (NIV). What is hearing the message? It's abiding. It's spending time. It's be still time with God in His Word, and that will increase your faith.
So, I want to stop for a moment and answer this question you may be asking. When I wrote the book, I hadn't included this. And someone said to me, what about this? I want to honor what she said because she was in a really hard place. And if you don't get to the answer you've prayed for, does that make God less trustworthy? Or is God less true? And that's what I was thinking back
then when I was so fearful.
And the answer requires a deeper understanding of what is unanswered prayer, right?
God commands us to pray, not to grant our wishes or give us what we want — we say this all the time at Proverbs — it's to build a relationship with Him. That's what it's for. And to deepen our faith. And for me, when she asked me that question, you know where I went to immediately to put in the book? I went to Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane because it's the only time I could think of that really meant a lot to me that He prayed, "Father, if you're willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done" (Luke 22:42, NIV). And way more of a burden, way more of anything than we'd ever carry, right? We carried our sin on Him. So, taking myself to that place when I struggle with unanswered prayer, it reminds me: Just look at Jesus. He went alone to be in the garden. If He needed that, how much more do I need? And who met Him there? The angels met Him there. The Holy Spirit met Him there. That's where we find Him, in that be still time, and then we can pray.
So, when you don't see God answering your prayers, the answer is, draw near. Don't run away, which is what you want to do, right? You want to run away. Draw near because He's gone before you. He's gone before you. He's walking with you now, and He's going to meet you wherever He's taking you.
So, we pray to God in Jesus' name, in faith, according to His Word, with confidence. And then we pray specifically. And that's just what I talked about with Elaine and her friends.
And so, all this means, y'all, is you go to the scriptures, open your Bible, do a Google [search], find the word you're struggling with. For me, it was anxiety. Could be fear, doubt, whatever. Do a Google search: Bible verses on whatever. Find them, pray over them, read them. Maybe find five or six. What speaks to your heart? The next thing you do, you just weave that verse into a prayer.
I'm going to give you an example. I already read you Philippians. You know what Philippians 5-7 says. The other verse was Isaiah 26:3: "You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you" (NIV).
So, now I'm going to show you how I personalized and prayed that prayer. We're almost done. We have time for this and then I’ll close?
Kaley Olson:
Yep.
Wendy Blight:
OK. Here's the prayer I wrote.
Father, I love You so much. Father, I have so much on my mind right now. I can't sleep. I feel anxious. Your Word tells me to fix my mind on You, not my circumstances and my worries. So Your Word tells me You are near and to pray about everything. So right now, I'm coming to You with my worries, especially the fact that I can't rest or relax. It feels like a motor is constantly running in my body. My mind never stops. I desperately want to walk in the fullness of Your peace.
So Father, I thank You that I can stop trying to control everything because You are in control of all things. I'm choosing to fix my mind on You and Your promises. I'm doing this so You will make my heart steadfast. And I'm giving all my worries to You, claiming Your promise that in doing this, Your peace that passes all understanding will guard my heart and mind. And I trust You for this peace because You're a promise-keeping God. In Jesus' name, I pray, amen.
So, I began this today talking about, Lord, please settle my unsettled soul. And I think we've discovered together the answer is to be still and then set apart times of prayer. But it's a choice, right?
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
It's something we have to choose. And so, I just want to encourage who's listening that if you find yourself in that place, whether God stills the storm or carries you through to the other side, He's going to be with you. El Roi, that's His name, right? The God who sees — absolutely sees — your tears and hears your cries.
So, I want to invite you to be still, and I want you to hear these words. And I wrote these; I'm just going to read and then I'll be done.
So, my friend, I know this is hard. What you feel is real. And though God feels far, He is near, right there with you. He's working things out for your good. And when your prayers aren't answered in your time or in your way, it's my deepest prayer that God has shown you that He hears you. His presence is with you. His Spirit is in you. His power is available to you. God is good, His love's secure, and His hope sure. And that, my friend, is Truth your soul may rest in.
Kaley Olson:
Thank you, Wendy. Meghan, I don't know about you, but we at the beginning talked about how we always looked up to Wendy because she's this prayer expert and she's always who we invite on to talk about prayer. But the way you [Wendy] described your journey with anxiety at the beginning, I know that was a really hard thing for you to go through. But I think for me it almost made me feel like, OK, I'm not the only one who sometimes has dips in my prayer life. It's not always this linear journey that even somebody like you — who I look up to so much — can go through seasons of struggling makes me feel like, OK, I'm not crazy. Or that it's OK to struggle, and it's always an invitation to come back. So, thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing that.
Wendy Blight:
You're welcome. I was here. I was working here; I was teaching. I was writing. I had published three books.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
So, it's not weakness. It's just how we are as humans.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah. But I actually want to ask you a question about that. You talked about the two things we need to do: be still and pray God's Word.
But I know for me, whenever I'm in the middle of really anxious and unsettled seasons, I really tend to isolate. And so I think there's definitely, for sure, power in being still and then praying God's Word. But what about reaching out to people? Because I mean, you and I were just talking about this yesterday and the feelings that we're having right now and what we need prayer for. But it took a lot for both of us to just be like, "I need prayer for this."
Meghan Ryan:
Like, am I OK? Are you OK?
Kaley Olson:
And this is going on. Yeah, because I think whenever we're anxious, we can get in our head.
Wendy Blight:
Yes.
Kaley Olson:
And being isolated and being still is a good thing. But sometimes it's not always a great thing. So, in your experience with that season that you were in, where you were scared to leave your house and you were afraid at all times and it had really just caused you to be super unsettled, when did you finally reach out? Or did you finally reach out to somebody?
Wendy Blight:
I did. First of all, I have my husband who was wonderful and walked me through. Then my internist when I went to her told me to see a counselor. My church has counseling, so I started to go to a counselor. And then I had a friend, Leah DiPascal — I know she won't mind — I talked to her. So, I had three people in my life I was talking to. But the be still time was something that is hard. And I wish we had more time to talk because that's when your voice speaks to you the most.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
And so, in the book, there are ways that really help you train your mind in those be still times to not wander back to where you're used to going because that's such a good point. But having people in your life that love you, whether it's family, siblings, a boyfriend, husband, counselor, friends, whatever, it's really important to have, even if it's just one or two. Because if you totally isolate yourself with no help from anyone — yes, God can do anything — but we also know He gave us community.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Meghan Ryan:
And those be still times — and maybe it's just because I like a formula, but there's not always a formula — is there a difference between be still time and the time I spend reading my Bible in the morning?
Kaley Olson:
That's a great question.
Wendy Blight:
Yes, absolutely. There's this difference in the book I talk about between solitude and silence.
Meghan Ryan:
OK.
Wendy Blight:
Solitude is being still, but you can be out riding your bike. You're still not with people. You might be around people. And those are things like, I think more of Bible study. So Bible study, riding your bikes, just taking a walk in the park, all those things that will calm your soul, that's solitude. And they're so helpful. And I give you lots of ideas and ways to do that. Memorizing scripture can be something that you do in solitude, right? That's hiding that Word.
But silence? There should be no people around you. You need to be all by yourself in your room so you can literally ... That's when God speaks. And I wish I had time to just tell you examples of in that stillness ... you’re one of the stories. That call I made to you from my car at the grocery store, that call was out of a be still time.
Kaley Olson:
Was that when I had just found out that I was pregnant?
Wendy Blight:
Mm-hmm.
Kaley Olson:
OK, well, I have to share this story.
I had a miscarriage in 2020, and that was a really hard season. I knew you were praying for me. But I had gotten pregnant again almost like a year to the day later. And I was terrified because when you find out you're pregnant for the first time, you're really happy. When you lose a baby and you find out again, I remember looking at the test and just going, "Here we go," and just being on pins and needles, but being so early that I didn't want to tell anybody. And I had told my husband and that was pretty much it. And out of the blue, I get a call from Wendy Blight who just said, "I feel like I need to call you and talk to you."
So, I'm thankful that I didn't have to wait as long as you did to have somebody come up to me and tell me that they've been praying for me. But yeah, there's true evidence that God works through those moments and puts people in your heart.
Wendy Blight:
Well, here's the thing. The first time, very first time, that He put you on my heart was when I either called or texted you a prayer, and it was the anniversary of your miscarriage. And I didn't know that. Do you remember that? That's in the book.
Kaley Olson:
Oh.
Wendy Blight:
Yeah, it's in the book. So from that moment, the Lord just knit my heart with yours. That's why that day in the parking lot at Harris Teeter, my conversation was telling you, "That baby's going to be born." And that was a boldness that would've never come but for that first time. And that's when you said, "I haven't told anybody, but I am."
But do you know what it's like to tell a person who had a miscarriage, "You're going to have a baby"?
Kaley Olson:
It's terrifying.
Wendy Blight:
I was shaking when I told you that. I mean, that's what He can do. So, just making yourself available is for other people too.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Meghan Ryan:
And I think just recognizing it is a fight for that still time. It's not going to come easy.
Wendy Blight:
No, it's so hard.
Meghan Ryan:
It's kind of like a muscle you have to train.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah, yeah.
Meghan Ryan:
I mean, for me, it's like phone's got to go in the other room.
Kaley Olson:
Yep.
Meghan Ryan:
Nothing's got to be around. And some days, I don't want to sit in it because the voices in my head are loudest the first.
Wendy Blight:
Yep.
Meghan Ryan:
But I do think I'm encouraged and challenged today that I need to go make some be still time.
Kaley Olson:
I know.
Meghan Ryan:
Even though it feels like I'm in a season of life where there's a lot going on and it doesn't seem like I can press pause on any of those things, if it's in God's Word and it's a command, it is something that we need to make time to do.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah. But, Meghan, I think that there's something we shouldn't miss from what Wendy said. She was in the Harris Teeter parking lot when she was being still and experiencing solitude.
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah.
Kaley Olson:
I mean, I don't have to go home every single time to be still.
Wendy Blight:
Right.
Kaley Olson:
Like, if I can find 10 minutes in my car and He can do what He did in the Harris Teeter parking lot, who am I to think that He can't do that in the parking lot here or whenever I get a moment to myself, even if I stay in the bathroom for a little longer than I should?
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah.
Kaley Olson:
So, it's great.
Wendy Blight:
But it is important that when you're in the depths of it, when you're in the depths of the anxiety or the fear, it is important to make it daily, every day by yourself somewhere.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
But then when you develop that, then you can go have it anywhere like you're talking about because you love it. You long for it.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah.
Wendy Blight:
I long for it now, you know?
Meghan Ryan:
My pastor in college said, "Discipline leads to desire." And I take that into every area of life.
Kaley Olson:
That's really good. That's really good.
Meghan Ryan:
The more I discipline myself to spend time in God's Word, the more I want it. The more I discipline myself to be still, the more I want it. The more I discipline myself to go to the gym, the more I want to go. So, I think that's just something I am reminded of.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah, for sure. Well, Meghan, I loved this series so much.
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah, it was fun.
Kaley Olson:
I feel like we talked about it at the beginning. What a great way to wrap up this series, with one of our favorite people who we go to for prayer and to learn from about prayer.
Wendy Blight:
Thank you.
Kaley Olson:
So, if you are just tuning in on YouTube or the podcast, please go back and watch or listen to all of the episodes that we have lined up for you. But, Meghan, you're going to share about some resources.
Meghan Ryan:
Yeah.
Well, first I don't want y'all to miss. Wendy has a brand new book out called Rest for Your Soul —
Kaley Olson:
Yes.
Meghan Ryan:
— A Bible study on silence, solitude, and prayer. And we cannot recommend it enough. It is practical. It has so much goodness in it. It's going to be one of those books that you want to just carry from season to season and use as a resource. And so, Wendy, I want to thank you for ... I know that that cost you a lot to put time into that.
Kaley Olson:
Yeah, for sure.
Meghan Ryan:
And so thank you for doing that for us. And we've mentioned it on the other episodes, but I want to mention it one more time. We do have a brand-new study guide with First 5 called Praying Through the Psalms —
Wendy Blight:
That's great.
Kaley Olson:
I know. It's so pretty.
Meghan Ryan:
— 30 Days To Uncomplicate How You Talk to God ... I said that on the other episodes, too. It's just very pretty. Yeah, this one is just really good because, like Wendy talked about, how do we take God's Word and apply it to our prayer lives? And that is something that this book will do. It'll walk you the different kinds of prayer, how to praise God, how to confess, how to intercede and ask, and all the things that we've talked about.
Those are two resources we do not want you to miss. So, we will link them in the show notes for you.
Kaley Olson:
Two resources, one written by Wendy ... other one, Meghan, written by you.
Meghan Ryan:
Yes.
Kaley Olson:
Written by Shea Hill, who we've heard from.
Meghan Ryan:
Yes.
Kaley Olson:
And a couple of other Proverbs people. And I mean, I just am so proud of the content that's coming out of this house. It's really exciting. But as we've got to wrap this up, this was a great series. Thank you so much for joining us at Proverbs 31 Ministries. We believe when you know the Truth and live the Truth, it changes everything.