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The Emperor-class battleship Carcass goes where it wants, crewed by cultists and commanded by a captain who fused with the navigator into a void of blinking eyes. Every eighth warp translation, something gets aboard — and the count just hit eight. Bethael sprouts a scorpion tail mid-blessing. The guardsman gets stuffed in a locker for his own safety. And four Chaos Marines begin the real war: converting one terrified mortal to their respective gods.
Website: https://www.narrativedeclaration.com
System: WH40K Black Crusade
Creators and Guests
What is WarHams: A Chaos Odyssey?
Four Chaos Space Marines. One terrified Guardsman. A cursed ship hurtling across the galaxy. Join us for a Warhammer 40,000 actual-play TTRPG campaign using the Black Crusade system — hilarious, grimdark, and utterly unhinged. Which Chaos God will the Guardsman ultimately choose? Who will prevail in the end?
what agrees of success i smoke a little bit of me when i move on first time you join chaos high
we put you in the locker oh there you are there you are
how does your water taste hulky yeah describe to us the taste of your water what does it taste like
well it's ice cold given that it's the frozen white north is ice a taste
yeah yeah it's like that it's that cold it's that kind of bitter creeping cold that only things
that are frozen or near frozen be okay okay it also has a noticeable tang of pollutant and
lead contamination in the pipes it adds a fine uh pungence to it perhaps maybe even
subtle notes of sulfur denoting some kind of buildup or maybe just like a little bit of
chlorine in there you know wow chlorine i'm dumb as shit this makes me feel terrified for reasons i
find difficult to elaborate upon
somebody has been poisoning the water supplies that's true you thought that was on the case
you thought that was the pybrae voice but in actuality it was the trooper kiskur
my bliska voice which is the same as the pybrae voice i want to i want to put an asterisk on this
conversation for later we'll come back to it yeah because right now we're playing a chaos odyssey i
almost said theory i almost said it i stopped i want it i want it i want it noted i want it fucking
noted that zern has done this like three times and when we pitched names i was like i like a chaos
theory i think it's good that is like that odyssey is better now all three fucking times i literally
the only major changing decision was because of because of the pitch you gave me i'm like oh if
it's like that it would make more sense yeah it's so good we're sent that way it'll be tied to what
we're doing we don't like so good i mean we haven't released it on youtube yet so we can change it
in a way just rename it and yeah listen to the first two episodes and and have people be like
what the fuck is going on every single time we say we say a chaos odyssey it's like oh it's like
oh yeah welcome to uh chaos theory we could we could we could re-release the first like two episodes
call them remasters and then just like here's the improved with alternate voice act things
yeah oh yeah alternate ending victory yeah yeah alternate dice rolls reverse every dice roll we do
we'll adjudicate it differently yeah everything's in reverse we're actually the imperium now
yeah i'm fighting the evil emperor of mankind how refreshing finally an imperium so thurston
what story do you have for us today okay like like we're doing with all these there's a quote
i'm not making any of you read this so i'll read this one um he's still you know i gotta i gotta do
it sometimes i know i'm stealing it i'm stealing it i'm stealing it he stalled it at long last what a
diocletian stands before his king he looks past the hanging wires that resemble intestines and the
clicking ticking life support engines and the preservative mist sprayed in the air in nine
second intervals he looks past the blood bags and the v-tie packets linked intravenously to the thing
on the throne which is just a chair compared to the great and grand artworks a throne without the capital
tea that makes it both a curse and the salvation of the species he looks at the revenant husk of
something that was somehow once somehow still is a man something that shouldn't be alive and arguably
isn't by any mortal measure something tortured by its own impossible continuation excerpt from the
carrion lord of the empyrean by erin demsky bowden which is the final final short story in the horace
heresy uh and is a fucking phenomenal read if you have right we hey hey they don't pay us enough
as you recommend those books thing you know i i fucking will look erin demsky bowden gets a gets
a fucking like go he he thanked alpha boost in one of his forwards he gets he gets a little nod
for me um oh that's cool yeah he's a good guy that erin demsky bowden yeah sure sure is write some of the
best books they do uh all right so we begin all of you in the arvis slider the vessel despite none of you
having skills to pilot it has been once once you've entered it and accessed the the controls
remote control activation begins the ascent protocols a hololithic image appears in the cockpit
where each of you hear a sort of crackling message um it's very comical harvest lighters are meant for
humans so like most of you are crammed in the back i think the only one who can probably like
properly fit in the pilot seat of this thing is evgeny
um so evgeny you're kind of like in the pilot seat and then the there's like a hatch that opens to the
to the back compartment where you know like the the transport uh bay would be and so you have like
four chaos space marine heads probably like staring down from this like extremely tiny door that none of
them could fit through um as you are sitting in the pilot seat of of this vessel is the only one who can
um and as you sit in the pilot seat there is this sort of um clicking sound as a hololithic display comes up
uh and let's do this uh and as that comes up you see a figure rendered in hololithic green light
it is a robed magi of not the mechanicum but or not the mechanicus but the true mechanicum
uh a wide grinning figure who at least the astartes of the group recognize as
the heretic engineer etilfar scourge
that's one hell of a name how do you say i love his smile it's right there oh my god there you go
i'm stupid i was too busy looking at my notepad to begin typing it down my bad ah hello it's very
good to see you all uh it appears you have conscripted a local can they fly this vessel or are you in need
of assistance i regret to say i think we're going to need a helping hand on this one
understood i am accessing the vessel through your legion armor which as you know i have modified to
allow for this i think i told you if i didn't then apologies and there's like clicking and tapping
and then suddenly you can hear like clicks and taps and ticks from the devices on board the the
arvis lighter in fact it's suddenly punctuated by the rear hatch while you're closing uh and the sounds
of like engine turbines activating ah very good simple imperial design has not changed in so long
since you are fighting in wars i believe yes very good very good this would be much easier if it
had immaterium engines or modifications but i shall put do i shall put do i believe you would
like to return to the vessel now is that correct
yes well if you pull our arms about it i could leave you down there if you wish there is nothing left
here everything is dead ah a pity the slave stocks would have benefited from resupply but i suppose we
shall endure it is the vessel shall breach transatmospherics shortly then vaunted lords i shall prepare one of the
embarkation decks for your arrival i believe the captain wishes to see you
captain captain captain for what uh the the hololith like abruptly ends at that point and you can as it
ends you see that the the harvest begins to shakily uh ascend and you you you begin flying over the
remains of the city um again the ghost sort of high proto hive beneath you becoming smaller and
smaller as the vessel uh ascends through the the cold atmosphere of this world the the distant sun
giving that blue ruddy glow to everything um that all dissipates fairly soon in fact um breaking way
into a perfect night uh sky and then into the stars themselves um though to the the side as you're as you're
looking through the the you know armor glass of the front again if genny is the only one who has like a
really nice view the rest of you would have to sort of like shift around to see it properly but um all of
you see these sort of large pinkish purplish anomaly known as the eye of terror that looms off to the side
uh a a home away from homes of sort um but that even soon begins to be dwarfed by the appearance
of your vessel a starship that hangs in the void as far as you can tell the only starship that hangs in
the void has an impressive frame it looks as though it is incredible in all which ways
it it grows in size and scope as you approach it soon it's encompassing the entire front view i'm just
imagining speakers grinding his teeth being like tell me what the shit is i want to know what
i'm waiting for you to tell me i'm waiting for you i'm hearing the distinct incredible
the incredible i'm hearing the instinctive crack
the instinctive crack of his teeth as he grits them
i'm ready for this to be a tugboat with a leak in it
the vessel the vessel that appears before you is robust austere um but but stained it's it's it
has marks of rust it has battle damage uh the entire one one entire side along the port has
had ruptures on it which have only been hastily repaired uh but to all of you
it is
home it is the emperor class battleship carcass
hey yo
that's crazy
hey i'll take it remember i'll take an emperor class
that's a good choice and the embarkation deck
awaits you which is very simple because the embarkation decks on this vessel are free since
there aren't currently any fighter craft on board it
yeah sorry about that one oh we're down
the monkey's paw curls
okay first priority we need to get ourselves some dread claws
uh we are we are one of the most imposing naval craft in space but we have no escort
we are we are so unbelievably over cap that we are going to die
we are shaped like a battleship and armed like a cruiser
easy monkey's paw image right now oh it's right there
for those that aren't aware the emperor class battleship
is the main state capital ship it's one of the main state capital ships of the imperial navy
this is a loyalist vessel that clearly we have purloined and it is nope they were designed and
operated during the grand the great crusade so some beautiful yeah i did my research
well they're also known as carriers and command ships that are well known for their powerful squadrons of attack craft
of which this ship has none at the moment well it's got an office lighter
so it does have an office lighter now what else do we need brother
oh yeah the office lighter is perfect we can all get into it and kill ourselves by crashing into the enemy ship
of course brilliant right what do you think we have or hey hey look in a horus heresy
they did an errata update to the harvest later because when they originally released it
it had no guns and that was kind of the thing
so when they finally made a plastic version of it they put a multi-laser on the inside door
so when the rear hatch opened which the original model you couldn't open they put a multi-laser there
so there could be some guy shooting a multi-laser out the ass this this this version of the
harvest lighter that you purloined doesn't have one of those it's a civilian damn it
of course we've officially reacquired a drop ship we're fine yeah yeah we're we're starting x-com all
over again
all right but as as you as as you see this so so evgeny this would be your first time um seeing this
and and you you know certainly you've heard of of of the heretical forces that's that threaten the
imperium as someone with some inquisition background um you've heard tales of that
souls that are like roiling masses of flesh or you wink and pop in and out of existence
or brass monstrosities with spikes this is none of those this is simply the faded glory of the
imperium you serve if anything it resembles a handful of the vessels you've even traveled on
um though most of those vessels would have been less prestigious ones you know that this is this is
the equivalent of what happens with something you know in the grand armada of the imperium
um that that right now would only happen to like tugboats and you know merchant vessels and army
transports uh the imperium would never let this happen to an emperor
class battleship any battleships of the line would never become so
ill-maintained but this one has been which strikes it as being different from any vessel you've seen
i'm thoroughly impressed by the scale of this battleship although it does strike me a bit odd how for all it's
hi i'm struggling to find the word glamour don't be the correct term to use here
it seems in dire need of maintenance that tech priest who is on the box earlier
do they not have a crew with them do they not have servitors staff members caught slaves in that
conversation good question thurston do we actually know what the situation in terms of
manning this vessel is like how dire are our straits uh well there there is a captain
um there is a bridge crew there are several members on board the ship uh from uh essentially indentured
slaves like an emperor bass an emperor class battleship can carry tens of thousands of people
uh um this one certainly has several thousand if not tens of thousands on board but they could be roving
gangs of of cultist worshipers or devotees uh there are still many members of the you know the navy that do
live generationally on this vessel um but you can tell that it's it's enough to operate however
the way this vessel has operated has always been a bit different and you what you would know about
that is this vessel goes where it wants to go and that has been sort of the curse each of you have
been stuck with is that you've been dragged along with this vessel without really being able to control
your own destinies so to speak
well the thing is manned well enough but it tends to float where it pleases i don't imagine that
that regardless of the crew it would bow to anyone
i have attempted to ply my brothers in the cleave for any sort of additional support but they are
reluctant to provide much to such an errant tree they have me and that is good enough by their estimation
you haven't died yet
died yet this
speaker
speakers yeah we'll get this i think it's moving soon
well i just i didn't want to interrupt anybody because i i i speaker d have a tendency to talk over
people and i don't want to do that you're good latency dance continue like the connection great
latency that's okay awesome we'll get this carcass to move for us but it'll take some time
time time that we've been trying to we've been trying to master this thing's damned spirit since the siege of terror
but we'll do it slowly but surely we'll break it to our will
i like that it is wild
uh beth ael your uh your vox crackles
uh there's an incoming signal to your armor
there's a voice that comes over
are you almost back
it's the voice of helbrose you're your battle brother from
the third or from from the world leaders
brother yes we have just landed in an
arvis lighter
yes yes i know i know i know i know yes yes if you if you hear the sound of metal screaming
that is my baldrens as we are trying to squeeze out of it move
the byzanti do you move ah what are you doing get out there and i will move okay excellent excellent
um yeah and so well when you have a moment i'm in the cages i need a good fight
yes yes yes of course the planet was far less occupied than i would have liked the city itself full
of nothing but corpses and dust but i don't care the cages i need to fight i need to kill
but i'll kind of perks up i go to the cages
go let me something amiss for some time no simply to join my brother
yeah go to it then i have business elsewhere and i will attempt once again to
ply the cleaved for something why don't i
give you a tour evgeny a nice little uh
breezy walk through the facilities of the carcass
there's not something down there that's going to tear me limb from limb is there sir oh there is
but not while i'm here oh we're actually the way as much as i understand everyone wishes to go enjoy
their leisurely activities the captain of the ship has called for us and i am quite curious as to why he
he needs us around
i suppose we can give him a little bit of our time
information is power slaneshi
there's quite a few things you could call power i suppose information is one of them
my folks will begin to walk towards the bridge okay yeah uh who's all going to go see the captain then
i'll go
i will go i look a little bummed about it
the surface is annoyed because he would rather be discussing things with his brothers but he will go along
okay ifgeny is just like ushered along by his four dads
literally it's just like a five-year-old with a bunch of fucking people
dad his brother is being like yeah let's go i have that kid harness on you right now
it's like how you're gonna wear the night except it's
i don't think i like this i don't think i like this at all
you'll grow to like it it's an acquired taste it's more efficient your legs are very small
right okay
yeah ifgeny um
you see that this this this ship is incredibly quiet you go through
several halls the embarkation deck itself is massive you could tell that this could host
squadrons upon squadrons of vessels uh except it's it's empty you like the sole vessel and then
some you know supplies and whatnot far away in fact the walk just just from where you landed
towards one of the exit doorways into the into the ship takes about 20 minutes and is actually
exhausting as you do so you eventually reach oh no good nope how long until we get there
it's quite a it's quite a trick little one i would save your energy and not get too far ahead of us
not much longer quite cyclopean and scope didn't expect it to be that big
well believe it or not this is a vessel that your precious imperium finds especially alluring
so just so you know it's not us nasty chaos worshipers making you do this little jog it's the god emperor
the god emperor is very far from this establishment
lifels will turn around uh to both of his companions and say
i believe you have misspoke they kind of just kind of walks to both of them he is no god he is no emperor
to us he is the bastard who ruined all the chances we got he is a corpse of dead men remember what he
should be called like turn around and continue on affronted by the name of god emperor
i was speaking metaphorically you philistine goodness gracious i thought the thousand sons
would have heard something about poetic license you reach a uh uh a gravlev uh that begins to ferry you
long at high speeds now as you continue your march through this vessel what elevator song is it thurston
don't you start with me i'll kill you smiles at camera please tell me it's the donna war tutorial
music no don't distract him with it no we can get back to the video right no it's simple he's gonna he's
gonna hurt me specifically he knows what he's gonna do i am trying to remember oh gosh which one was it was
it like final liberation that had the like epic like orchestral like intro
are you thinking about the you're not thinking about the super marini
no no no what was it yeah no that one yes the ultra marini one yes that oh my god
chaos gate that chaos beautiful there we go it's that excuse me that's alphabusa tts excuse me
sure sure super marini no we gotta get super marini oh that's the one my foes wants soup
he wants soup soup he can't even eat it he just likes to look at it he wants soup in the belly he wants
soup in the belly back when there were more slanesha's on the ship we did a killer cover of
this but no one saved the tapes be grateful nobody saved the tapes it was all harsh noise they called it
a avond guard i feel like we shouldn't bring you on missions anymore i think we should leave you in a zoo
i'll be pleased to note that when you go on a long walk around the vessel something that
is indeed a long walk i believe the last time i clocked it it was about uh two weeks round trip
it's not too bad no and i was moving at a brisk pace
it's quite a lot of music elsewhere but cultist groups what are you to do
you say two weeks to move around the entire vessel
give or take it's quite a large vessel there's a lot of things to look at a lot of paths to traverse
and of course the lesser ones would not be so inclined to impede progress of any of us they're too busy
doing all kinds of good work
at that kind of glacial pace i'd be lucky to move around this thing and
wait how fast are you suffice well you must bear in mind little one that you would have to stop to rest
you would have to stop to eat you would have to stop to defecate sleep eat hunt all of the
important things that people of your stature must do i simply walked ceaselessly
you would be about a month i believe if you really put your mind to it
oh i might be able to shave a few days of that one i have not eaten or defecated for several days
in a row before sure it would be that hard to manage if i could well find food it's the finding
the food part that's hard
with that the the the gravel of comes to to a halt uh you find yourself in a cyclopean
spinal hall that you travel down for probably another hour uh eventually reaching
a side access port into the strategium the bridge of the vessel uh there is a single figure
um kind of in in standing supplication at the door uh i'll let urndil describe them to everyone
oh how's someone i love the chain shaking foley that was very good whoever did that
oh that was applesauce shaking her collar oh applesauce good job yay
the apple anyway that's not applesauce that shows up before us but a rather befouled looking uh
presumably meeting maybe like uh like like a half foot shorter than evgeny depending on how tall
evgeny is but she is a very obvious supplicant to nurgle she is very deformed and
very gaunt about the face teeth pulled back or not teeth lips pulled back to expose the teeth
and a very permanent grin etched onto her face some horns poking out the side of her hooded head and
decked in some repainted and thoroughly befouled guardsmen armor with a brighter hue to it
more in line with cephas's armor really what you see before you is lucitrix
an attendant to cephas and probably one of the only people the cleaved seemed to have been even
remotely willing to send aboard the ship ah you've returned welcome welcome back
we don't ever talk at the do you i don't know if you want to roll play with yourself or what i'm not
gonna i will i will roll play with myself as necessary you guys are welcome to talk as well i'm not gonna
take the whole scene evgeny welcome to your future should you dare to become closer with cephas worm spine
lucitrix the lipless
hi lord yes yes it is and you friend welcome aboard you are new i can tell not many come aboard the
the command deck very often lord who is he
evgeny evgeny don't be rude uh not being rude sir i just meeting new people i've not seen a living
person in quite some time and certainly not one so alive as lucitrix it's a pleasure to meet you ma'am
ah your lord helped me escape from the
the trappings of the imperium yes the the corners of her lipless smile curl even higher
you're a fresh convert this is so delightful i knew my lord could convince anyone
the other lords are also likely going to want you to join them but ours is far better
is that not true lord yes lucitrix it is please step aside so we may enter i do not believe the
rest of my companions wish to tread on top of you apologies we shall move aside come lords into the
deck come come i do not think she know this is if we walk on her she's very hardy you would
hear a pop but i would rather she not die just yet no and i can't wait to hear that pop
let's go oh
the door opens with a pneumatic hiss towards the strategium
uh evgeny as you peer forward you can tell that they're
like there's no sounds you've you've been on command decks or you know even strategic
upposts there's usually like voices or sounds it's almost deathly quiet inside
it is unusually still for one of these i've seen a lot of strategiums in my time serving the imperium
but i'm starting to believe that this ship really does go where it pleases
we live with our curses hello
is anyone there
uh i guess okay can the marine step forward at this point
yeah yeah i did like do all of you just kind of walk in like yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah lucitrix is
hanging out um unpleasantly closed up to you so i'm going to assume that all the marines are sort
of walking in front you've getting you're kind of behind them so you're seeing these like large power
plants and stuff as they're like striding in um and then and then they they they lead into the
strategic you look around you can see that there are there are indeed uh staff here they're they're
in like heretical debasements of the uniforms of the imperial navy um coats and officer jackets
some of them impeccably maintained some of them actually like so old and moldered that you're not
sure if the flesh of the individuals inside is attached to them and if that attachment to their
clothing has also attached to the metal in fact you get a bit of a headache staring at it so you
don't stare too long um again kind of going to the solace of the back plates of the of the four
marines in front of you uh but there but there are staff here walking working away at consoles
even servitors some hardwired some maneuvering about their their sounds all somehow muted in this
chamber it's a very dim light the only light that seems to be here is is a similar blue to the
blue of the planet you were just on vans heron's world um as there's just this like hue over everything
um it it has a bit more of a purplish tone to it as as you get closer um towards whatever the marines
are walking um and then then they part and you see a throne stationed in the middle of
the strategium but when they part oh oh evgeny you're gonna give me a minus 10 willpower test for
actually yeah minus 10 willpower for something horrifying that you see that the others have
all seen before and don't need to check for okay okay i'll try he makes it with a six well i do
actually you're right very nice yeah fucking oh unfazed uh oh it's a six yeah i thought it was a 60 no i
can't read four degrees evgeny you are so absolutely broken by everything you have seen
in the in in the last well few days really um that what you see you know would shatter your mind
normally but it has just become an accepted part you see the mass of darkness that sits upon the
throne uh whether it was a man it is a man whether it's something else entirely you remain unconvinced
there's the the hat of a captain um held against the raw
ruinating form of something that can barely maintain its tangibility
oh we love this thing stares at you with far too many eyes blinking in like vivid whites and pinks
and purples from within blackness the illumination of the lights giving way to red sinuous flesh underneath
oh
by the way audio listeners there's some really badass art from my name jurors for this this character
um so i so i think hulky's just uh just unlocked at the moment
yeah you would do well not to stare over long
again again he's not even staring in general he's just like looking past the captain into the
yawning void of space and just all right
whatever man four degrees all right four degrees of success i smoke a little bit of meth when i move on
uh past we have we have met this captain before right yes so you would know that following your
climactic escape from the battlefield of terra uh you came upon a vessel and that vessel
the carcass uh had to perform an emergency escape and and that escape did not go well for both
the captain and the navigator who have since become one in the same
oh oh i love that um they exist simultaneously on both parts of the ship together both the navigator
sanctum and the strategium the same black abyss um that no longer speaks
it simply stares and blinks with far too many eyes is there any interpreting anything that this thing does
or is it just looking well as as you ask that question that's when from out of of the sides of the
strategium comes the captain's voice who you you've been told was the original first officer of the
vessel um but is far too impossibly old for that to be true uh perhaps it's a continued lineage
she is a woman with like bleached almost bone white skin but finely maintained hair um bionic right eye
uh tattoos of of of the octet even even jewelry in honor of the octet and a grill plate that goes just
below um her her neck um as though she has a second like set of teeth sprouting out over this grill
um and she stares and as she does so there's the crackling of of the vox
great eggs the captain is to depart shortly
the captain's voice stares looking over each of you then pausing in evgeny kind of narrowing
her one eye like her one remaining eye i see the captain will be translating shortly into the immaterium
however i must remind you all that this is an eighth translation
uh to all of you astardes who are on the ship every time the ship translates
account occurs and every eighth translation something gets aboard the ship
ah there have been a few of them um
um the one one of the in just a few situations you all remember um though uh cephas you don't remember
all of them the other three have certainly been involved uh you remember the the weeks of hearing
from the vox my name is samus blasted over until a red-skinned daemon was forced back uh out of the ship
after much bloodshed amongst the slave population um though that pales in comparison to the damage done
to the to the crew later on by the lemurian predator that got aboard um everyone's simply hearing
the mass as it went through and did its business then there was the the reign of mephistat the plague
griever this was before cephas had joined um and it established a beachhead of nurgle's blessing on
the ship before the three non-nurgle aligned astardes uh had to work together to force it out and contain
it uh then it brought us to the the um spiritual infection by the warp ghost of the bearded baron
which also infested the hull of this ship um there was also slight the demon that raged from its defeat
by something it only called the ravener and then so far at least the worst of them all the thing that remains
unspoken as to what happened by all of you the void itch
i can just imagine cephas like hearing about the nurgle like incursion and just like snapping his
fingers like daggett i missed you that's a good idea he's upset because he missed it it's like he
like he missed out on like a luau so we're going to have an unexpected guest this translation
just when i was thinking that we couldn't make a worst first impression uh evgeny they have not
really explained anything it's just like you've heard it's the eighth translation and then like
by sand he laughs out and says this what is is there something special that occurs on
this translation is it every eighth excuse me i need to make the willpower uh willpower test at minus
10. can i ask you a question would lucifrix have been here for any of that or is it just uh cephas who
would have been any well any bit aware of that i just need to know i'm intending to talk lucifrix
would have been here for some of them okay cool just making sure yeah yeah yeah like i'll give you
some some leeway on which ones i'm gonna let speaker go obviously i'm not gonna just would it's definitely
not there for the void itch though good oh it's one of the lovely little curses we live here
you see every eighth warp translation perhaps by the capriciousness of a blood god corn or some other
unrelated melody we tend to have something break through from the other side and cause problems for
us so we can expect your first day above the carcass to be one spent patching it up
or killing whatever it is that comes aboard that is you act as if it is never exciting
it is always exciting always fun see even the stinky one agrees yes now don't get me wrong here
i happen to like the eighth translations when there's something novel but i swear if we get another void
itch again i'm going to hold one of you personally responsible and i haven't decided which one yet so
you better try to get on my good side i don't think that will happen two times in a row if it would
help i would be willing to take responsibility for it so that you could redirect your ire effectively
if it makes you feel that much better well that is very tempting but the thing is is that
you know you all just piss me off in so many different and wonderful ways i find it so hard
to settle on just one of you you know i'd rather play it by ear it's more exciting that way don't you
think i applaud that choice it's very sensible
i have a question there's about 20 meters um of space around the captain um how close was everyone
getting to the captain i love the captain and i will get as close to the captain as i want i don't
love psychic bullshit so i'm a little further back like what's a little further like 10 meters away
like maybe a couple of meters behind by zante okay like within five okay okay yeah uh cephas and
lucid tricks are probably like closer to hanging out with evgeny so wherever he's at yeah evgeny
where are you chilling like you're you've made your your check and everything so
if getting is just finding something to hang on to at this point
okay but how close like if between zero or between zero and 20 meters from the captain
20. okay cool so you're far off with okay lifos where are you uh he approached him but didn't get
like obviously uncomfortably close so like 10 probably i'm imagining him in that overly like overly
obnoxious stairway to the very dick it's all the way up to one throne that the rogue trader sits on
kind of deal so this one's imagining but i'm at like the base of the stairs yelling at him
cool cool so as this goes on um evgeny you've got cephas and lucid tricks by you um sort of like
having conversing bethael and uh byzanti are sort of talking right by the captain the captain's
voice lifos you've kind of positioned yourself near this midpoint sort of staring and kind of taking
in the information here um and then all of the eyes on the captain shut making him this void of
darkness uh but that exact moment everyone who is not cephas
evgeny and lucid tricks begins to hear these whisperings
that that drill into your skulls i need all of you to give me a hard willpower test
uh so wait who is making this test i'm sorry everyone but you and hulky
okay got it that is a 72 with six degrees of failure whoa hard
well that is a 75 with six degrees of failure my foes succeeded with a 29 with three degrees of success
that is awesome all right one sec here um we'll start with byzanti byzanti
yes you gain two corruption points oh yeah beautiful uh and
you take seven uh willpower damage oh
as a note characteristic damage is uh restored at a rate of about one per hour so we'll keep track
of that okay i'll explain what is exactly happened once i do the math stuff oh excellent bethael you
gain five corruption oh cool i double it what's your corruption at my my friend 10 cool uh and you also
take eight willpower damage ah lol um you are assailed like mid mid this conversation you're having
you are assailed by like gibbering whispers though this cacophonous voice is is is it's impossible to
tell what they're saying bethael it just it causes the nails in your head to sear with white hot heat
as though your skull is burning and you want to do nothing more than let out blood or rip out rip
out your own skull you're not sure which and it just embroils you and causes you to rock back and
forth byzanti you the thing about these these whispers is is you know you know that it's information
you know that it's information that you could also be keeping to yourself and not letting other people
know about and that bothers you that bothers you on such a such a primordial level and that it's a
sensation you could have but you're you're not able to have it and and lifas um you you hear these
whispers but you're able to comprehend like some some some strands and wisps of what's coming and as
you're doing this you can see that that the the vessel is breaching into the warp at this exact moment
and what you're experiencing here is some some part of the captain things communion with the
immaterium and the voices of neverborn shifting and crawling into the ship momentarily and you just
hear it will come for you below it will come for you and it will need a sacrifice it will need a
sacrifice for each to depart and then the vessel about the ship pops into the interior yeah for sure does
this ship have a geller field yes it does okay but chaos vessels and geller fields are kind of a
strange relationship um in that you still use them to prevent like other warp entities from just
like coming in and eating your crew wholesale but they're they're less maintained they're more prone
to issues things like that is the fact that every eight translations something gets on board is proof
enough that the geller field on this vessel is not um it's not it's not hold proof yeah um is there
like say for example is there like a closet or a like a container or a metal container just strewn
about the room somewhere something that i can like put a thing into and enclose it oh yeah yeah there'd be
like lockers and whatnot up on here cool uh lifos as soon as he's hearing the whispers he meet in and
begins to see the ship pretty much begin to like transition through like the big yawning purple
portal that basically will have to kind of uh coast itself through he begins to turn and goes straight to
yevgeni and of course uh i'm propose this but of course feel free to uh be like hey you know this
is what i oppose with hulky uh that's basically what i'm doing here uh lifos will basically come
up to yevgeni without saying a word and grab you uh by like the front of your armor basically lifting
you up but not like all the way up high but just like a little bit as if he's carrying a toddler by the
pack of his shirt and he will walk directly towards one of the lockers and the plan here
is that he's going to basically just put you in the locker and close it and make sure it's sealed
as the as you uh or as we kind of journey through the initial part of the immaterium will that do
anything to protect him from the immaterium translation um i mean it might just like keep
him away from like any anything within i think i think lifos you you would know that it was just
proximity to the captain and so you'd be able to see that he's a bit too far away to be effective
so he's actually safe where he is um i'm not worried about the captain thing i'm going by the logic
that i've been told five million times that for warhammer lore that if anybody even just looks outside
the window when you're going through the immaterium ward you can just go bad shit crazy or weird
things oh yeah yeah yeah for sure for sure for sure for sure i'm like okay you just want to get
him like out of the out of the way of like the viewports okay yeah i'm just like he shouldn't be
looking outside that view screen or at the windows come here like you're gonna be messed up and you
look at this here you go as if provided hulky goes with it cephas is going to like pause the
conversation he was having between the three of them and just walk with you carrying on the
the conversation with evgeny i mean he's not really going to be able to fight back you have
a regular human being versus a meta human souped up with the powers of chaos at this point he's he
passed through the eye of the needle he looked into a gestalt warp entity and now he's getting
stuff in a locker fuck it whatever man it beats having your head blown off
first time you join the chaos we put you in the locker
what are you fucking 20.
would you like to would you like to act this out i could lead in with something if you'd like
absolutely uh lifo he does exactly that very wordlessly as a you two are having your conversation
and he goes that's why i'm gonna i'm gonna converse here with uh with him and then i'm just
gonna lead in with you if that's fine yeah go ahead i got an idea ah well welcome to the command
deck i trust that you find the captain to be ah hello lifos what is it hmm i'm literally just
i'm not even talking to you i've just grabbed him and going
and then both the nerglites start following you to wherever it is that you're going still talking
with the Evgeny well we're entering the immaterium now so i believe you should be well braced for this
mortal on that punctuation he puts you in the locker Evgeny and then closes the door like like just so
he doesn't go too insane in life of school walk back and just observe the nice view outside
appreciated brother where were we Evgeny can you hear me just fine in there
it's not like it's a soundproof room sir it's a locker i'm perfectly fine in here i've done warp
translation before it shouldn't be much of an issue well the geller field is functional but for the eighth
translation it's more a suggestion than a concrete rule would you like it if we prayed together my
brother Evgeny no i but i appreciate the offer i'm not uh particularly swayed by uh whatever god you
worship at this moment very well would you prefer would you be all right if i prayed on your behalf then
if i could interrupt into it that's okay go ahead uh as i'm walking up i assume i see byzanti uh i
love that you've left byzanti and like bethile and we're gonna come back to bethile because it's gonna
be a good one i was doing some reading right now i have i have a thing in my mind uh we can execute this
so uh as lyphos is going over to the lovely view of the windows and stuff he'll pass by byzanti and
he'll go like he's currently being prayed to and he points uh back at the locker because i'm pretty
i'm sure byzanti has seen what i've done and yeah definitely he points there leaves it at that and keeps
walking to the window fucker so you're you're such a cock and i'm going to go and walk towards the
the locker container i would love that i'm gonna interrupt this because it all makes sense and is
exactly what happens and the camera is gonna move over like three meters uh to focus on bethile yeah
i apologize who is no no no no no this is this works really well because bethile is the first
uh of us to reach 10 corruption points um oh yippee on a failure on a failure so that is a gift of the
gods bethile oh yay yippee time for new art here we go yeah exactly i was about to say uh sorry skelly in
advance um oh no yeah my favorite line in this entire rules engine oh hit me roll me a d100 yeah here we
go okay boom 85 awesome i will read this in a moment one sec i like the name of it already um oh boy oh boy
oh oh oh no oh no oh what
bethile gains the compunction to not talk to anyone unless he makes a willpower save no no it's worse
oh boy let let uh let oda read it yeah sure what page uh you're gonna want to read page 297 297
strange walk strange walk strange walk oh now part of the ministry of sunny bucks this one
sucks uh all right any number of afflictions could result in the character suffering from a strange walk
from a minor change in proportion proportions to an acute imbalance of the mind that may result in the
character gaining a disturbing gait perhaps appearing to uh slide across the ground or something more
debilitating such as a crab wise shuffle or a rigid straight-legged march the character's movement rate
is halved welcome to the slow club sister now now there is silver lining though if i may and i may be burying the
lead for thurston but if i'm not mistaken you can modify the result on this table by your infamy bonus
which is yes oh so an 85 will allow you to modify it to the following options okay strange walk is one of
the bad ones but it's only a twofer so your alternate options here are you can get an additional limb
cool or a tail a tail oh man you should read the one corn gives you
oh that's actually really sick yeah oh all right and then the other one is a slayer limb uh no it's
just a no no no okay oh you get additional limb which is on uh which is on page 290 but you really
want to go to 291 and see the the corn subheader there let's see the corn subheader here uh 291
let's see the limb is bristling with bony spikes any unarmed attack using the limb have the tearing
quality ooh oh those are both really cool but i gotta go with scorpion tail that's sick as hell
fuck yeah so so as lifos as lifos is like coming up to like to to betha or sorry to byzanti to inform
him of what's going on in in the locker um the camera moves over and like betha el like as i've said
your your head is on fire the nails are pounding they actually bring you to your knees where you are
visibly shaking yeah he's like fingernails fully in the skin on like the shaved side of his head just
pulling and clawing until just every every inch of his face is just covered in blood
and then there's like a wet cracking sound from behind you as emerging from your back
the glistening black scorpion tail
and just like screaming pounding on the ground and then just
the best part is the best part of this is that hulky is in a fucking closet
you see okay out there oh god why did you ask me that i'm gonna roll minus 10 willpower
i'm sorry he died he died he fucking died out there there's a lot of screaming is everything
all right interesting developments
it's a i know many secrets
what is happening out here is that betha el is being blessed by his patron
you are perhaps missing out on seeing that but i believe i understand lifos is concern
i don't think you can see me but i'm giving him a thumbs up from in here
you hear a patting on the metal locker door attaboy
i see that this eighth translation has given me a blessing
a scorpion tail you know i always did think of you as an irritating little bug
come closer and i will show you exactly how irritating it can be no thank you and i'll get very far away
you like rush over to the closet
it's a lot of the closet yeah but then he puts his hands up to his mouth he just tiptoes away
very loudly tiptoeing me one person posting up daily updates on a freak bait in 40k
it's true the the fucking the tiptoeing sound sounding more like
if that is all you wanted to discuss captain i would like to go to the cages now
the captain's voice you are blessed and can't go
thank you
he's going to turn and very stiffly almost like the flaw he just avoided
he's going to walk down the stairs and just
you know where to find me when we have a guest call me when there is blood to be shed
farewell brother you know is it me or does that guy have a really strange walk
i start
crab walking this is gonna lean towards byzanti and you swear you can see like he's about to pull
like a shit-eating grin from beneath his hood but you can't fucking see it you just see like
an eyebrow arch over one of the eye socket holes he gives me the the rock uh he's leaning in like the
rock byzanti he just grew a scorpion's tail you'd walk funny too i think
and that would be the first that would be the first time
i think that's the first time byzanti would hear the like and he has a scorpion tail
yeah yeah you've getting yeah
he has a what yeah he grew a tail
the guy i don't mind saying that now because the secret's out yeah secret's out you don't have to
hide anything the gods work in fantastic ways young one i i can't stand to think how that would
benefit anybody actually well it doesn't benefit why would i ever want a scorpion tail
well to put it bluntly young one it benefits his enemies far less hopefully we'll see
i suppose that's a fair point it's got the stinger aren't you going you're walking away
you're gone he came back and he left the hammer come on man he left over there
he forgot his chain hammer dropped it like grew a scorpion
just imagine as you walk this fucking astardi size size scorpion tail just drags on the floor behind you
like yeah yeah enjoy the new balance learn how the coil and stuff and every single time you bring
him you keep stabbing yourself in the back like ah i can't get used to that
so byzanti is here and byzanti is here you were coming over to bother me yes yes i am now you've
get me don't let all this talk about scorpion tails set you off don't let any of these freaks and ne'er
do wells pray for you before you know it you're trapped in that box with a blessing you didn't ask for
you need to earn your blessings is it so necessary to posture at this time brother we're merely praying for
his safety i don't want another foul smelling ape on this vessel if i can help it quite frankly it'd be
nice to have more refined company but i'll settle for being our dearest evgeny's personal guardian angel
do i have any say in this or no okay of course you do
you you always have a say if you don't like it you can take that las gun and you can put it in your
mouth and you can pull the trigger chaos is choice chaos is life what he means is technically you do
realistically no there's no technicalities about it let yevgeny find the god that calls most his soul
which will undoubtedly be slanesh
just slanesh um does that one make my skin fall off and my teeth rot out of my head
only if you wanted to well i would rather not i quite like what i have i would not like to lose that
not much of a looker but i would prefer to not be a rotting corpse that talks excuse me though your skin
may slough and your teeth may fall out nurgle the grandfather is a lord of cycles they will fall out and
fall off but they will also come back painfully delightfully and you will grow to like it yes and
if that doesn't sound appealing to you you won't be alone slanesh is the prince of pleasure the dark
prince the ultimate being of love and joy in this misbegotten galaxy why wouldn't you want to serve
such a gorgeous goddess huh love and joy doesn't sound like the worst thing world but i can't help but
feel uh a measure of doubt what you're telling me there is something about tearing people and
enjoying it i i don't know about that sir but uh it certainly sounds better than
growing to love losing parts of myself and then growing them back painfully that sounds a little
better shades of gray as it were we will teach you we will all of us teach you byzanti i believe it is
worth noting that although the grandfather's gifts appear grotesque and unpleasant at first i must reveal
to evgeny the most important fact i am being completely honest right now is there something you're
forgetting to tell him about your prince of excess let me think i'm gonna roll willpower
excellent good oh well you know me i do have many secrets but such things are every time
every time every time i hear it all i'm all i'm basically hearing is
oh it's not gonna go very well anyway think of it like a lap track
oh go ahead speaker i accidentally cut you off i do indeed have many secrets
and they shall be revealed in time some of them anyway the the sound of of pneumatics moving uh fills the
the strategium as the shutters finally close you know something about the honesty of in candid nature
of you telling me about rotting and then living and over and over again somehow fills me with less
dread than the omission of information the byzanti is forwarded to me
he's getting his reputation with nergal has gone up by one you have
you have choices remember this as it was the truth and he is correct you have choices we will all attempt
to convince you it is up to you to choose i merely make sure that you know all that is before you straight
away it's a very good deal brother speak for yourself i will
a crackling of the vox comes off one of the nearby speakers and he says at all a scourge
can you come visit me please to whom is i would appreciate it if you could come visit me
he says i'm in my workshop who is he directing this at just everyone it's just coming out of a vox emitter
um which you gather he's probably hacked into most of the cameras on the ship
kenny do you think he would he be able to hear it if i tried to talk with him uh very likely
who are you directing this at heretic oh any of you that would come i i thought i would explain where
perhaps it seems we are going this time
very well evgeny would you like to come with us if not i can have lucitrix show you to the barracks
the decks crew decks and whatnot remembering what bazanti had told evgeny about the big things in
the lower decks that would just kill him without his intervention i if it's not a problem i wouldn't
mind tagging along for a little while at least then i can see whatever the hell you two are up to
don't we need to find um bethael no under those circumstances is that ever a necessity
he is one of the more senior veterans that we have with us we may as well check on him when he is
finished it will take us some time to get down to where our heretic has posted up lifos
lifos would turn to acknowledge you we're going to go meet with the heretic in the
sub deck are you coming with us yes my first will can i do something stupid
you're gonna do a funny walk yes strange walk because you because we decided the role at the
beginning of this that i am an all-powerful sorcerer and i have to make people sure people know right
yeah yeah yeah um so i if i can convince you i have the war uh i have the psychic power mind over matter
you described it to me as basically this is you know the jedi force thing but yeah yeah
i is like i do not want to use this as a cheat see thing in the future but it's up to you
uh i want to as i basically turn around i imagine i'm going down these long flights of stairs and i
want to uh do mind over matter to allow me to float graciously down i have my cape flow and everything
and i'm holding my staff to show just how dominant i am over my psychic powers to show how amazing i
am as a sorcerer yeah um so that will be just i'll make i'll allow you to do that as a routine check so
we'll power plus 20. excellent thanks but it'd be very embarrassing if you failed that's why i'm setting
it up i will do uh plus 10 because of the side hood thing i kind of minus down there and i need a target
of 85 let's do it technically 75 but nope didn't get it 87 there it goes no oh yes i know that you will
need the assistance oh the almighty the all powerful life what happens thurston so you try to channel it
but you can tell that you know you're just you're just not trying enough of of the warp's energy like
you could draw more of the warp's energy and that would help a lot that would help a lot a lot um but
basically kind of in your in your fettered state that you attempted to cast this at
wasn't enough you have to suck more from from the well of the immaterium the geller fields kind
of blocking some stuff yeah i'll make an attack if uh but there's risks please don't i don't want to
have an incursion on command deck nah do it i know i'm good to gamble let's do it man all right let's
do it i am at all the immortal words the immortal words of those with too much hubris do it pussy no
balls what's that uh what's that what's that picture of like the man the old man walking away
dejected underground with his pickaxe in hand while the other guy is rushing towards a gem vein that's you
but you're channeling towards a pile of dynamite it's scarbrand you're channeling towards scarbrand
so if you allow me to actually just cast mind over matter full throttle that'll do all the psychic
rolling stuff yeah excellent i will go full pushing for this yeah which will guarantee a roll so let's
see how this goes did a roll and 27 you're gonna float like nobody's business like you are gonna
look like in fact there's like little arcing like non-damaging lightning that trails from your cloak
i think i think i fixed it we can double check uh i don't know does it tell me the dice roll i don't
see the dice roll i don't know if it's working or not i'll assume me either do we just want to take that
one or you want to take the 10 it's up to you uh one second you want to see which one's 15 or 25 yeah
i'm gonna see which one's more funny i'm gonna fuck me oh it's appropriate
oh oh i well there's well i think the 15 is funnier oh the 15 is definitely well it only does her animals
it says so the other one's kind of different oh no oh no no no no no it's it's the
it's the aura of taint but it's the second part yeah all animals within 1 d 100 meters become
spooked and agitated oh there it is characters with science science can pinpoint the psyker
as the cause oh so you've you've drunk powerfully from the well there's no animals like on the bridge
or anything that are affected by your your little thing however for a brief moment as you're in the
immaterium you let off energy oh god yeah yeah yeah yeah 93 meters you uh let out energies like a
like a brilliant torch um that psychically sensitive creatures can see just putting
that in my toolbox oh that's a back pocket thing it's a surprise tool for later yeah then you make
your way to edelfar scourge um yeah i land down in front of of you uh cephas and crew and you know
just with the floor of my cloak let us move on i haven't well i thought you were doing that to
like be a badass like floating jedi the entire way i i would appreciate if if you just like were like oh
okay and now i just hop down after i fly up for a few seconds okay let's walk everybody dude that'd be
funny yeah but no you make your way there um eventually you you reach the the vaunted double
doors into the mechanics workshop edelfar scourge is inside with probably three or four dozen servitors
the servitors are all sort of not meandering but they're they're they're at you know at different
stations uh some of them are working with strange esoteric objects others seem to be working on
repairing weapons or equipment edelfar scourge is over a a kind of triplet of uh hololithic displays some
that seem to have the images of planets floating around and others that are like more more strange
metallic objects that are lining up in in different patterns um kind of like oraries
very interesting ah hello greetings scourge we've arrived what did you need very good very good
i believe i have tracked us through the immaterium it's we are going towards a void in the immaterium
i think it could be another vessel perhaps
another vessel yes something very large much larger than us larger than us yes by some magnitude
so says ears fucking prick up a large vessel like some kind of hulk perhaps in space puts a hand up to
his non jaw yes very much so but i'm not sure i will need to pinpoint it more i that that was was one
uh the the thing has boarded the vessel what has i don't know yet but all of my senses indicate it
somewhere in the the mid to lower decks lore colon is already looking for it uh you would know that lore
colon is another renegade astartes on board the vessel
it suddenly cephas seems to think of something and he turns to byzante
and then he thinks better of it and turns to lifhos
aww
thanks for role playing lifhos yes lifhos
where are the cages again where are the cages thurston do you want me to roll for that
um you know you'd know you'd know um you know f.i.l wants you to go there all the time
um the cages are on the uh the section where the mid deck roughly is about to reach the lower deck
that uh i believe we should probably do something to ensure that uh beth israel does not meet an
untimely demise
but when do we have to yeah that's actually a legit question it would be exactly what beth israel would
want it is what i want as well for him to meet his appointed death but it would only be his appointed
death if everything lines up if we just sit here and do nothing he would die surely of just falling
out of the ship by burrowing through it well if whatever got onto the ship finds bethael first i don't
think any of us want to miss that show now do we let's go i hate it when the zinchin is right
i began to lead them down to the cages below
absolutely okay yeah bethael
go byzanty oh i was just gonna say i was following okay evgeny following along of course
okay beth iel that's me that's you that's that's beth iel right that's beth iel
good old bethie make an attack roll uh standard attack roll with your uh with your chain hammer
my chain hammer yeah all right no fist fights with the bros today it's fine
uh just regular yep please all right uh fails you miss wildly your weapon goes smashing into the wall
of the training cage denting it with the sheer force of impact uh as you do so there's just this like
booming laughter it almost soothes the the humming of the nails in your ears
Lords as your your brother hellbrose backs up
dude
he keeps laughing it is a blessing
um you have an opportunity to strike him again if you'd like to
oh yeah i'm i'm swinging while he's laughing at me yeah yeah
oh even worse that is a 91 four degrees smash into into the wall
again like it is and alberus isn't even even dodging just as he
said
what you fought some mortals on the surface
oh i'm sure the the las gunners quailed when they saw you
or the dusty people in rags oh did you know they could shoot
fire
would you like to attack again
uh um yeah i'd say he's like starting to teeter on the edge of a frenzy
yeah yeah totally
but he'll he'll take one more swing oh 23 i'll give you five degrees of success
oh excellent excellent so like you bring your weapon down it is incredibly incredibly well placed
um hello hello mist can you go
uh and and almost instinctively um your your weapon is parried suddenly uh by helbrose who pushes the the the almost you know near and near fine shot onto his body aside with his weapon and roaring the entire time oh oh you almost got me there is this how they felt
Were the mortals quailing
And how well you could fight
Oh
They were such sport
I'm sure the blood god was so
Honored to have you spill
Such great great
Blood in their names
Yeah I'm gonna frenzy
Yeah yeah yeah
Oh so you spin around frenzying
Okay okay
Oh is that it
Is it
So you're frenzied now right
Yeah
That's a cool thing
I think that has some
I think that has some downsides when you frenzy
It does
I cannot carry
And I am trying to jump to it
In the book and my control F does not
Like me today give me a quick second
Okay
While you're doing that
I don't do this often
But
Could you please
Could you please look in
Black Crusade General
Yeah for sure
What are you posting
I feel like we're gonna get a lot of mileage
Out of that image
If I get it right
Rage as a full action
Game plus 10 weapon skill
Plus 10 strength
Plus 10 toughness
Plus 10
WP
Willpower
And then minus 20 to ballistic intelligence and fellowship
Yeah
Yeah yeah yeah
You cannot retreat to
Yeah
And so
Okay
Okay
So you enter your rage
Except when you do so
Helbrus kicks you in the stomach
Just like raises up a ceramite boot
And like you pull back after all this taunting
You do like an orc bloodlust sound with your hammer
Um
And then this ceramite boot hits you in the stomach
It's not enough to damage you
But it does wind you
And gives you a point of fatigue
Oh the mortals were waiting down there
Oh I'm sure you scared the blood off the ones in the city
Would you like to attack in your frenzy now
Oh yeah I'm swinging
Yeah go give me a swing
Uh now getting a plus 10
Absolutely
Uh
I'll give you a 7
For 8 degrees of success
Absolutely
The weapon is once again parried
Whoa
There's another like breakneck block from the weapon as it comes up
Helbrus rolled an 11
Um
With his parry check
Uh as
Christ
And you are once again sort of pushed back
As you're bringing this immense hammer up and down
Smashing into the ground
Oh there there's just
There there is just this almost um
Booming laughter that like pushes you back both mentally and physically
Oh
And what what
For all the quailing mortals you killed
You got a tail
Oh I'm sure that's why you got such a stunning gift
At least you don't walk like a crab
That is true it could have been worse
That doesn't sound like someone who's friends ate
Yeah exactly
Yeah okay I'm glad you appended on the
Give me another attack
Alright yeah I'm swinging
Just uh I'm sure this is probably routine by this point
The two of them just absolutely going at it
Oh yeah
In the cages
Three degrees of success
Finally
Finally
You
You impact
You
You hit
Ceramite
In the left arm
Uh
Roll me damage please
Okie dokie
Um
Twenty eight
Not bad
Not bad
Uh
And then
My extra two
Just just in case
I don't think it'll be higher
Uh
It
It was a little higher actually
It's four
It's four higher
Yeah
Yeah okay
That's three or two
With a pedafore
Cool
Remember the
It automatically does the rending roll for you
Oh it does
Yeah
Remember last time
It might not
Wait no no it's not doing the
Yeah I don't see it
Yeah
It probably didn't show it very well
But I
Oh
I made sure it did
But it
It's fine
If you want to replace it
Go for it
Oh
Uh
I don't see where it did it
But maybe
Maybe I clicked the wrong thing
Or
Yeah
I probably don't see it
I
Don't worry
Just
Just ignore me
Keep going
No worries
Um
Your
Your weapon comes
Smashing in
And as it does so
It smacks into his left arm
There's the cracking
Of
Of some of the ceramite
Um
As
Uh
Klaus takes a wound
He's
He's absorbed it
With most of his stamina
He comes back from it
Sort of shaking
Is
His arm
Looking up at you
There you are
There you are
Come on then
Just shaking
A little foam
Out of the corner
Of the mouth
Yeah
Uh
Give me
Give me an attack
Buttons
Oh
She's lagging
A little bit
There we go
Uh
Will give you
Two degrees
Of success
Gonna
You're gonna
Hit again
Um
As it comes down
Again
You see
Helbrus' weapon
Once again
Comes up
And deflects
This time
Uh
Quickly
Quickly
Maneuvering
To
To
Throw
Uh
Not throw it away
But deflect
The
The blow
Of your hammer
Which impacts
The floor again
Um
Lifos
Byzantine
Um
And Cephas
Which one of you
Would have been
The first
To walk into
The cage
Uh
Probably
Cephas
If he's leading
On
Yeah
Definitely
Not me
Okay
Um
Bethael
Uh
Give me
A willpower
Test
Oh
Of course
There we go
I knew
Thurston
Was doing
This
Yeah
Uh
Has it been
An hour
And you
Like the good
Uh
Since you're
What
Since I took
The willpower
Damage
Uh
Yeah
It'd be one
Hour
So you're
Down by
One point
To your
Damage
Alright
So I'm
Back to
Well one
Point
Not the full
Thing you
Lost
Just one
Point of
The damage
Oh my
God
Woo
That's
A one
So you
Like you
Are pushed
Back
From uh
From
Helderus
And as you
You are
Sort of
Turn
You see
Cephas
There
Standing in
The sort
Of doorway
Of the cage
And your
Weapon
Comes up
Like you're
Gonna bring
It down
To hit
But you
You sort
Of snap
And as you
Do
You just
Hear from
Behind you
This voice
From
Helderus
Weak
And like
Footsteps
As he sort
Of walks
Off
Leaving you
With your
Returning
Companions
Surface
What do you
Want
Hail brother
We came down
To check on you
Because according
To our
Resident
Heretic
Whatever has
Boarded
Is in this
Vicinity
This
Vicinity
The lower
Decks
The usual
Area
Subdecks
Whatnot
Mainly
Wanted to
Come down
To see
If you
Had
Encountered
It or
Not
Clearly
Your
Sparring
Must have
Not
Attracted
Its
Attention
No
No
It seems
Not
Brother
Have you
Seen
Anything
Cephas
Is gonna
Look past
Bethael
To try
And see
Who he's
Talking at
As you
Sort of
Shout
You can
Tell
That Helros
Has
Like
Departed
Just
Incredibly
Quickly
Like
Just
Feet
Planted
Going
Like
Wants
Nothing
To do
With
This
That is
To be
Expected
Your
Sparring
Partner
A bit
Disinterested
In being
Around us
I would
Presume
Yes
Likely
Not
Many
Of us
Have
The
Patience
That
I
Do
It is
Appreciated
Nonetheless
Brother
We will
Require
Your
Considerable
Murderous
Talents
Come
We can
Put them
To good
Use
It's
Going to
Uh
Uh
Nod
Enthusiastically
And is
Going to
Kind of
Hop over
The edge
Of the cage
And land
With a
Considerable
Thud
Cephas
Is just
Gonna
Pat his
Shoulder
Come
Around
Let's
Get to
Work
Yeah
And
So
Evgeny
You're
You've
Kind of
Been
Watching
This
Right
Mm-hmm
Uh
You can
Like you
You were
Able to
See sort
Of the
Aftermath
And it's
Like it's
Pretty
Stunning
You see
Beth Isle's
Chain hammer
Has left
Like six
Just massive
Indentations
In the
Deck
Plating
Of the
Cage
From where
That hammer
Has smashed
Down
Some
Sizeable
Force
And damage
You're
Doing
Just
Sparring
Sir
You sure
That's going
To not
Compromise
The structural
Integrity
Of this
Vessel
If it
Does
I figure
It would
Have
Happened
Already
I
Mean
Often
And to
Hold
Back
Is to
Deny
Myself
The
Ability
To
Push
My
Limits
Evgeny
If
Beth Isle
Had the
Capacity
To destroy
This
Vessel
From within
Purely
On his
Own
Merit
He
Would
Not
Be
In
This
Backwater
Assignment
I
Feel
Like
Abaddon
Would
Have
Come
And
Personally
Plucked
Him
From
Our
Grasp
Beth
Isle
Would
Have
Been
Better
Serial
To
Be
Fired
Out
Of
A
Cannon
At
That
Point
Powerful
Warhead
Yes
As
Powerful
As
You
Are
A
Psyker
Lifos
Like
Just
Looks
At
Beth
With
No
Eyes
Because
He
Has
No
Eyes
And
It
Sees
That
His
Insult
Has
Gone
Over
Their
Head
And
Luke
Back
To
Compliments
I
Go
And
He's
Like
Yes
Um
Byzantia
Is
Just
Going
To
Walk
Up
To
Lithos
And
Just
Look
At
Him
Straight
Up
And
Just
Gotta
Go
Like
Are
You
Gonna
Take
That
Shit
Yes
He
Crosses
His
Arms
So
Where
Are
We
Going
Now
Surrounded
By
Floors
Do
Not
Worry
I
Promise
I
Will
Not
Compromise
The
Integrity
Of
The
Hull
You
Will
Not
Be
Sucked
Out
Into
The
Unforgiving
Vacuum
Of
Space
And
He
Is
Going
To
Try
To
Give
Yevgeny
A
Like
Smile
With
The
Brass
Teeth
That
Is
Horrifying
Thank
You
I
Appreciate
You
Not
Spacing
Me
Like
That
You
Are
A
Few
People
In
My
Time
And
I
Would
Not
Like
To
End
Up
Like
The
People
Who
I
Sent
To
A
Terrible
Demise
Yes
It's
Very
Bad
Very
Very
Much
So
I'm
Sure
You've
Seen
People
Freeze
To
Death
Their
Insides
Boil
A
Little
Bit
Further
Outward
It's
A
Terrible
Way
To
Die
Not
Ideal
No
No
Let
Let
Go
And
Find
Whoever
Is
Visiting
And
Reduce
Them
To
Pulp
Please
This
Is
A
Wise
Idea
Bethaniel
Gather
Your
Things
Like
There's
A
Word
If
I
May
Bethaniel
Bethaniel
I
Forget
I'm
Stupid
I
I
Misheard
The
Last
Thing
No
You
Know
What
It
Was
Daniel
Genuinely
You
Know
What
It
Was
Odo
I
Do
Yeah
Bethaniel
And
Then
Your
Old
Vampire
Nathaniel
Was
The
One
I
Was
I
Don't
Know
What
The
Fuck
Is
Going
On
Oh
I
Thought
You
I
Thought
You
Were
Doing
A
Bit
Where
Byzant
Gets
Beth
Is
Name
A
Little
Wrong
Every
Time
No
It's
Just
The
Fact
That
He's
Got
An
Angelic
Name
That
I
Just
Have
Like
My
Brain
Shorts
Out
And
Be
Like
Beth
Than
You
Beth
Annie
Beth
Annis
What
Was
It
Beth
Just
Like
You
Are
A
Power
Life
A
Moment
If
You
Will
Will
He
Yes
Sorry
I was
Fixing
A
Thing
In
The
Background
Yes
How
Can
I
Help
You
All
Right
I'm
Gonna
Pull
Lighthouse
Aside
Just
As
Everyone
All
Gets
Their
Things
Ready
Are
You
Seeing
What
I'm
Seeing
No
I
Have
No
Eyes
Hold on
Hold on
A second
Oh
Thank
God
You
Can
Roll
Play
Today
I
Can
Roll
You
Want
To
Tell
Class
What
You
Rolled
Yeah
I
Rolled
On
My
Minus
Ten
Will
Power
Check
To
Be
Able
To
Share
Information
Gonna
Get
So
Much
Fucking
Mileage
Out
Of
This
Oh
It's
Gonna
Completely
Destroy
Me
This
Fucking
This
This
This
It's
Really
Good
Have
Have
Have
You
Seen
How
They
Talk
Bethael
And
Our
Newest
Mortal
Friend
Yes
They're
Very
Friendly
Aren't
They
Indeed
A
A
Soldier
May
Well
Find
Themselves
Without
Wit
Or
Discipline
Walking
The
Path
Of
The
Blood
God
And
Likewise
They
May
May
Well
Wind
Up
Traipsing
Into
The
Embrace
Of
The
Plague
Father
Too
Now
I
Believe
That
Chaos
Is
A
Choice
And
Ultimately
Our
Dearest
Mortal
Friend
Evgeny
Will
Get
To
Choose
His
Path
But
If
He
Chooses
Wrong
I
Will
Kill
Him
And
I
Have
Full
Confidence
That
You
Will
Lead
Him
Down
The
Right
Path
No
We
Will
Lead
Him
Down
The
Right
Path
Lithos
Evgeny
Must
Not
Be
Allowed
To
Become
One
Of
The
Worshippers
Of
Our
Adversaries
Therefore
I
Propose
A
Deal
A
Conspiracy
Go
On
We
Must
Work
Together
To
See
Him
Turned
Either
To
The
Service
Of
The
Changer
Or
The
Dark
Prince
You
See
Live
Folks
Are
Kind
Of
You
Know
Tonk
His
Skull
A
Little
Bit
In
Thought
And
Goes
All
Right
Then
Let
Us
See
Which
One
He
Chooses
Oh
I
Knew
I
Had
A
Good
Feeling
About
You
You
Z
Idiots
You
Just
Can't
Resist
A
Good
Conspiracy
And
Lucky
For
You
Neither
Can
I
I
Always
Love
A
Good
Scheme
Now
Let
Us
Revel
In
Our
Dealings
Together
Yes
I
Just
Imagine
As the
Laughter
Is
Going
On
It
Like
Cutsi
Evgeny
And
Beth
Is
Just like
So do you
Like
Stuff
In any
Event
You
Have
To
Be
Wary
There
Will
Be
Many
Who
Will
Try
To
Turn
You
To
Their
Ranks
Just
Weigh
Everything
Carefully
Before
You
Make
Any
Sort
Of
Decision
And
And
Then
There's
Laughter
Ah
What
Well
What are
They
Joking
About
Something
Likely
At
Our
Expense
Brother
They
Seem
Like
They're
Having
A
Good
Time
They
Usually
Laugh
Like
That
Yes
Yes
They
Are
Having
A
Good
Time
Don't
You
Want
To
Go
Over
To
That
Side
Where
They're
Having
Happiness
And
Laughter
Now
Evgeny
I
Would
Warn
You
About
One
Thing
While
Beth
Isle
And
I
May
Have
More
Subdued
Interest
In
Joining
Or
Having
You
Join
Us
If
You
See
Those
Two
Laughing
About
Something
You
Should
Be
Very
Concerned
Yes
Usually
The
Laughter
Precedes
Some
Sort
Of
Scheme
Or
Something
Debauched
I
Don't
Quite
Want
To
Know
What
Runs
Through
Byzanti's
Head
Besides
Copious
Amounts
Of
Amphetamines
And
Other
Sorts
Of
Blood
Like
Substances
But
I
Guarantee
You
They
Are
Excessive
Be
Wary
Choose
Wisely
See
Uh
Well
I
Appreciate
The
Advice
I
If I
May
Speak
So
Plain
And
I
Fear
What
Will
Happen
If
See
The
Wrong
Way
I
Don't
Rightly
Trust
Any
Of
You
Fully
For
My
Well
Be
You
All
Seem
To
Have
Your
Own
Vices
And
So
On
So
For
You
Are
Wiser
For
It
You
Need
To
Understand
You
Need
To
Understand
Something
Many
Of
Our
Lords
All
Four
Of
Them
Have
Certain
Ways
Of
Demanding
Mortal
Attention
For
Zinch
And
Slaanesh
They
Tend
To
Be
A
Lot
More
Subversive
I
Chose
To
Be
Honest
With
You
And
If
I
May
Beth
I
El
Korn
Is
The
Simplest
Of
All
Hmm
I
Will
Not
Contest
That
There
Is
No
Great
Conceit
With
Regards
To
Korn
Yes
I
Believe
That
You
Will
Come
To
Your
Choice
Eventually
But
All
I
Will
Say
Is
This
In
The
Simplicity
There
Is
A
Simple
Truth
Violence
Is
The
Language
We
All
Speak
No
Matter
Who
Whose
Name
You
Raise
Your
Lips
To
It
All
Comes
Back
To
Violence
It
All
Ends
In
Violence
Bloodshed
That
Is
All
We
Have
It
Is
All
We
Need
No
Matter
The
Simplest
Law
Of
Nature
If
You
Will
I
Apologize
I
Didn't
Mean
To
Cut
You
Off
No
But
You
Are
Correct
The
Simplest
Law
No
Matter
Human
Astartes
Xeno
Daemon
Loyal
Or
Otherwise
We
All
Speak
In
The
Tongue
Of
Violent
Too
True
So
Long
As
Somebody
Disagrees
With
Somebody
Else
Or
Has
Something
That
Another
Wants
Or
Simply
Because
They
Don't
Like
Them
For
Any
Other
Reason
Than
Just
A
Feeling
There
Will
Always
Be
Conflict
You
Always
Come
To
Blows
At
Some
Point
Indeed
Like
It
Or
Not
Indeed
It
Is
Why
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
They
In
The
End
Does
Not
Bother
Because
I
Know
I
Know
It
Will
Come
To
Bloodshed
The
The
Point
Thus
Made
If
You
Are
To
Speak
Speak
Clearly
And
Speak
Plainly
Don't
Try
To
Suck
Up
As
It
Were
We
Are
All
Four
Of
Us
Mostly
Approachable
And
He
Will
I
Guess
Grin
And
Then
Like
Ooze
Ooze
Ooze
Ooze
Is
Glibly
Ooze
Is
Audibly
Oozing
So
Kindly
At
You
He's
Just
Gonna
Shake
His
Hand
And
Wick
A
Whole
Bunch
Of
Foul
Ooze
Onto
The
Ground
Away
From
Yvgeti
Since
He
Clearly
Doesn't
Seem
To
Enjoy
It
Very
Much
He's
Not
Quite
Ooze
Pilled
Not
Quite
Ooze
Pilled
Just
We
Are
Very
Interested
In
Your
Choices
We
Will
Not
Risk
Doing
Something
Untoward
Now
Come
We
Have
Spent
Enough
Time
Apart
Let
Us
Carry
This
Forward
And
Be
About
Our
Business
Yes
Oh
Yeah
And
Evgeny
Bethael
Has
A
Tail
Fuck
Me
I
Weren't
Kidding
Oh
No
We
Really
Weren't
I
Assume
I
Assume
That
Just
The
Way
That
You
Were
Walking
You
Didn't
You
Never
Saw
Bethael's
Smacks
Me
Sends
You
Flying
Oh
Yes
It
Is
Going
To
Take
Some
Getting
Used
To
It
Is
A
Good
Bit
Of
Extra
Weight
I
Appear
Tail
My
Lord
Huh
I
Approve
Of
Your
Tail
My
Lord
Thank
You
It
Is
He's
Gonna
Like
Pick
It
Up
And
Like
The
Hover
The
Stinger
Over
His
Own
Shoulder
And
Look
At
It
And
Just
It
Is
It
Is
A
Weapon
That
Cannot
Be
Taken
From
Me
I
Will
Be
Appreciative
Of
It
Oh
Don't
Say
That
Byzantus
Says
As
He
Re
Enters
The
Scene
Presumably
Would
Like
Those
And
Stage
Left
Yeah
You're
Just
An
Unlucky
Power
Sort
Slice
Away
From
Being
Bereft
Of
Your
Newest
Dependage
Cherish
It
If
They
Are
Slicing
At
My
Back
It
Means
That
They
Will
Not
See
The
Chain
Axe
In
The
Front
The
Chain
Hammer
It's
Not
An
Axe
Fuck
As
You
See
Even
The
Coronate
Cannot
Even
Name
Their
Weapons
Right
Join
The
Knowledgeable
Side
We
Know
What
They
Call
Our
Shit
Oh
Dumb
As
Fuck
Fuck
I'm
Too
Stupid
I
Don't
Know
The
Differ
The
Hammer
And
Then
Don't
We
Have
Some
Pig
Farms
Have
To
Go
Scrape
Out
Or
Something
If
We
Are
Lucky
Pig
Farm
Pig
Farm
Stop
Your
Talk
Of
Pig
Farms
We
Have
Business
To
Attend
To
There
Is
A
Demon
Who
Support
The
Ship
In
All
Likelihood
Yes
Sorry
For
Another
Time
Perhaps
I
Would
Like
To
Hear
That
Story
Sorry
It's
Just
Really
Funny
To
Me
The
Corny
Wants
To
Hear
Of
The
Pig
Farm
I
Am
Curious
Once
Upon
A
Time
In
The
Swamp
Of
Sorrows
They
Have
To
Build
Four
Farms
The
War
Chief
Bedtime
Story
The
War
Chief
The
War
Master
Horace
Has
Demanded
That
You
Create
Seven
Million
Pig Farms
People
Who
Don't
Know
What
We're
Refercing
Is
The
Warcraft
One
Intro
Sequence
Of
The
Orc
Campaign
They'll
Know
Yeah
There's
Probably
Some
Lost
People
Going
What
Are
They
Talking
About
They
Don't
Need
To
Wait
This
Isn't
About
Them
You
Know
The
Fans
Out
There
Don't
Fuck
Them
War
Master
Horace
Landed
On
Terra
After
Converting
To
Chaos
And
Said
A
New
Land
To
Claim
For
A
Pig
Farm
Cool
If
We
Are
Lucky
There
Will
Be
Blood
To
Spill
Come
How
The
Hell
Do
We
Find
A
Demon
In
The
Bowels
Of
A
Battleship
This
Is
Funny
We're
About
To
Find
Out
Yeah
We're
About
To
Find
Out
Oh
Yeah
A
Psyker
I
Forgot
About
Him
Fuck
How
Did
We
Forget
About
Him
Jonathan
Psyker
Jonathan
I
Have
Cast
The
Rubric
Of
Arima
I
Forgot
He's
Not
Just
A
Skull
Now
That
We
Have
Gathered
Our
Companion
I
Believe
That
Heretic
Wishes
To
See
Us
Maybe
They
With
Their
Vast
Ability
To
Maintain
Eyes
On
The
Ship
Help
Us
Find
The
Incursion
That's
A
Good
Idea
But
We
Just
Came
Back
From
There
And
I've
Got
An
Even
Better
One
I'm
Gonna
Walk
Up
To
The
Nearest
Technological
Looking
Apparatus
Skurge
Can
You
Hear
Me
Just
Let
It
Be
Known
I
Don't
Think
I
Said
A
Word
For
The
Last
Twenty
Minutes
Bless
Son of
You
We
Love
This
Game
Thirst
And
We're
Having
A
Love
One
I'm
Living
The
Dream
I
Literally
That
Whole
Fucking
Bit
I
Was
Timing
It
That
Whole
Fucking
Bit
Started
Started
With
Me
Asking
So
Where
Are
You
Guys
Going
Next
And
You
Didn't
Move
Like
More
Than
Fucking
Three
Meters
No
We
Must
Fight
Over
Hulky
And
The
Big
Fly
We're
Traversing
The
War
We've
Got
Time
Before
Any
Sort
Of
Incursion
Becomes
A
Problem
We
Can
Chat
No
No
No
No
It's
All
The
Stakes
Look
I'm
Just
Excited
To
Turn
Into
The
Alien
Movie
Okay
I
Know
I
Just
I
Fucking
Love
It
I'm
Just
I'm
Just
Pointing
Out
How
Great
Years
Of
You
We're
Okay
For
Some
Region
People
Like
It
Yeah
We're
Stuck
On
That
Bit
It's
Horrible
It's
Forever
Now
Because
He's
Got
A
Pig
Farm
True
I
I've
Definitely
Practiced
That
Bit
In
The
Car
Before
The
Like
Oh
Fuck
Why
Do
You
Worship
Korn
And
Of
Course
As
We
Begin
To
Make
Our
Way
We'll
Find
Out
What
Happens
Next
Time
On
A
Chaos
Odyssey
Thank
You
Guys
So
Much
For
Watching
This
There's
Going
To be
A
Two
Part
For
This
One
So
Thank
You
So
Much
For
Watching
This
Episode
And
We're
Excited
To
See
What
Horrors
We
Rive
To
Next
Time
So
Thank
You
So
Much
For
Your
Support
Love
You
All
And
See
You
Next
Episode
To
You