Perfectly Unfinished Conversations | It's Good Enough, Let's Go!

Perfectly Unfinished Conversations | It's Good Enough, Let's Go! Trailer Bonus Episode 18 Season 1

YIN & YANG: Why You Need Feminine Energy in a Masculine Gym World

00:00
In this episode, Coach Jo and Coach Kim dive into the profound importance of balancing Yin (feminine) and Yang (masculine) energies in health, fitness, and life. They explore how these complementary forces shape their personal and professional experiences, emphasizing the need to harmonize rest and activity. From the pitfalls of overly Yang-focused fitness trends like 75 Hard to the transformative power of embracing Yin energy, the coaches share candid insights and examples from their journeys. 

Coach Jo and Coach Kim encourage listeners to engage in self-awareness, blending strength training, cardio, and flexibility into routines and planning intentional self-care to avoid burnout. Food and nutrition also get a spotlight, as they encourage listeners to strike a balance between structured eating and mindful indulgence, letting go of many diet myths we’ve learned over the decades.

Listeners will gain practical tips on incorporating Yin and Yang into daily life, from scheduling Yin activities to tuning into their unique energy needs. The conversation highlights the challenges of achieving balance in a high-intensity gym culture and offers actionable advice for maintaining harmony across life stages. Tune in for real, raw insights into aligning your energies and reclaiming your well-being—and don’t forget to share your thoughts, subscribe, and explore personalized coaching opportunities with Jo and Kim!


Resources discussed in this episode:
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Contact Joely Churchill and Kim Berube | Iron Lab: 
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Transcript
Coach Jo 00:09
Welcome to Perfectly Unfinished Conversations, the Iron Lab podcast with Coach Jo…
 
Coach Kim 00:14
…and Coach Kim…
 
Coach Jo 00:15
Where you ride shotgun with us as we have raw, real, unfiltered, and unfinished conversations about trying to eat, sleep, train, and live with some integrity in a messy, imperfect life.
 
Coach Kim 00:27
We're all about creating a strong support system, taking radical personal responsibility, having fun, and being authentic. And one of the most common themes you're going to find in this podcast is the idea that we create positive momentum in our life, by doing what we call b-minus work.
 
Coach Jo 00:45
We’re making gains and getting ahead and loving life without self-sabotaging our goals by striving for perfection. We get it done by moving ahead…
 
Coach Kim 00:55
…before we're ready…
 
Coach Jo 00:56
…when we aren't feeling like it…
 
 Coach Kim 00:58
…and without hesitation.
 
Coach Jo 1:00
Be sure to subscribe now on Apple or Spotify, so you don't miss a single episode. It’s good enough. Let's go.


Coach Kim  01:09
We got episode 18, Yin and Yang: Why you need feminine energy in a masculine gym world. Welcome back, folks. We are really excited for today's episode on yin and yang, because when it comes to health and fitness, we think it plays a role that has probably never been addressed this way. And so we're going to dive straight in. Now to kind of preface, Joe and I had this terrific conversation the other day when we were connecting about masculine and feminine energy, and that's what inspired this podcast conversation. So let me set the stage: in my own 2024, year end review, I had kind of an informal coaching session with a super smart friend named Carly, where she had me do this sort of reclamation of self exercise, so to speak, where I review my life, my energy, tools, gifts, and I am paying attention to where I may have left an aspect of myself or a piece of myself with another person, place or thing at some point in the past. This is the idea about energetics and about calling back pieces of yourself or energy to you. So it sounds pretty out there, and at the time, during the exercise, I didn't really grasp the concept. But afterwards, while I was thinking on this idea and reflecting, I had this massive aha moment. So for many of you who know me, personally, I love New Mexico. My family has a history there. I have family who lives there, and I feel called to be there. I really feel at home there. I love it. But one of the last times I visited there in 2021 with my mom and my sisters, at the end of the trip, I truly was not ready to come home. And don't get me wrong, I love my life here. I have a beautiful life here, and I love my people, my husband, my business, my friendships, but I didn't want to leave. And so for months after I returned home, I longed to return and grieved that departure. And it took a good eight or nine months for my heart to settle. Now in the reclamation exercise, I had this aha that I had left a piece of myself there, maybe a soul piece or an energetic piece, but it was a soft piece. It was a part of my heart, and I would label that as feminine energy. And so the really cool thing was, is just that awareness and recognition and the intention of calling myself back to myself, was really meaningful to me and re energizing. I felt an actual shift, and it was the return of yin, this feminine energy, back to myself. And I felt it like a puzzle piece being put back into place, making me whole again.

Coach Jo  04:18
And for those of you who think that sounds like a little out there, we want to bring this idea to life for you. Yin and yang originate from ancient Chinese philosophy and are foundational to Taoism. This concept was first documented in text around 700 BCE. And BCE stands for Before Common Era. It's a non religious alternative to BC, which means, before Christ. So yin, yin, top of it represents the feminine, the dark, the more passive and even more receptive energy, while yang embodies the masculine, the bright, the active, you know, loud energy, the. Think of yin and yang as the ultimate dynamic duo of energy vibes. Like together, they symbolize the duality of nature. They're not opposites like enemies. They're more like peanut butter and jelly, like fire and ice or Thelma and Louise. So let's just break them down, yin energy, this is your chill, Netflix and sweatpants, candlelit bath kind of vibe. Yin is about stillness, softness and introspection. It's cool, it's calming, and it's really nourishing, like a big, cozy hug for your nervous system. In people, men with yin energy might be the grounded, introspective guys who are great listeners, they have calm, confidence and a vibe like they'd rather meditate than shout at the TV during a hockey game. Women with yin energy, they exude nurturing vibes. They're intuitive, creative, and probably the ones you'll call when your life feels like a hot fucking mess and you need someone to just get it out. So yang energy, now, the opposite side of the spectrum, this is your go getter, like Red Bull, Beyonce is–who run the world–anthem. Kind of energy. Yang is bold. It's dynamic. It's action oriented. It's the spark that gets things moving, like a dance party for your soul in people, men with yang energy, they're the classic alpha male types, driven. They're ambitious, they're loud, they're the let's fix this problem, type of guys who thrive on action and results. And women with yang energy are Boss Babes. They're fiery, they're ambitious, they're independent, they're crushing their deadlines. They're crushing their workouts, while still finding time to call you out in your bullshit.

Coach Kim  06:50
So yin and yang in harmony. It's actually like magic that happens when you balance the two. So if you have too much yin energy, you can feel stuck or overly passive. Maybe you feel like a bit of a doormat. Maybe you feel disconnected from yourself or from others because you're giving too much of yourself in the care of others and not yourself. But if you have too much yang energy, or yang I suppose they call it. We're definitely in…

Coach Jo  07:26
We’re Canadian. We’re in Alberta, so it's yang. 

Coach Kim  07:28
You’re headed for burnout city because you're pushing too hard non stop, without stopping to breathe. And the balance and duality is very much representative in many things like yin is night time and yang, or yang is the day. Yin is the moon. Yang is the sun. It's the pause and the play. It's white and black, right? You need both for life to feel good. It's balance. Now, Jo and I both have a lot of yang energy, like we're commanding and determined and bossy and in charge, we might have a lot of what I call push energy. We're loud. Some could say we're abrasive or brash at times, and it's actually a very masculine energy for a woman, how, Jo, how do you recognize the power of your yang? 

Coach Jo  08:27
The power of my yang allows me to command a room of people. I can public speak. I can get things done. I don't need anyone like Kim always, she kind of teases me, but she knows I don't like to ask for help, because I can do everything myself. I'm independent when it comes to fixing a washing machine, a dryer, like I'm going to try and tackle it and just see what I can come out with. And I think that is a huge powerful thing that it leads into the confidence of my abilities to just if I put my mind to it, I can fucking get it done. Yeah. Simple. 

Coach Kim  09:00
So, yang for me is determined. It is push energy. It's productivity oriented, it's goal task oriented, for sure, but where I've also noticed it in my life is that, and it really became apparent after I kind of had this reclamation exercise calling my yin back to myself was yang energy for me shows up even in my relationships with my husband, like he loves me for who I am, but I can be pretty bossy and controlling, and that even a great example of this is that I have to tell him how to drive somewhere, you know what I mean? Like, not how to drive, but like, take this way, or I'm annoyed if he doesn't go that direction. Like, that is yang energy and and I don't think there's anything bad of it necessarily. Like, it's not a problem until it's a problem for relationship, communication, or in the case that we want to talk about it, when it comes to the gym and your nutrition and fitness, it's a problem to always push if you are not honouring the need to also rest the push versus the pause, right? And so Jo and I think that there's a lot of value in beginning to apply this concept to training as well as lifestyle habits, it's pretty typical to look around and find all yang in fitness, all yang in the gym. Like let's sum it up in a few terms. David Goggins, 75 hard, CrossFit, Kettlebells, running 10 kilometers, all very yang. Controlling your food, eating high protein, even meat, men eat meat off the bone, you know? 

Coach Jo 10:48
Yep, I agree. 

Coach Kim 10:50?
So the whole get it and discipline harder. No fucking whiners allowed. Is all very, very masculine, all very yang. And there is a place for it, but it would make sense that at some time you tap out like or that mentality drives a lack of balance or even possibly injury. So Joe, tell me your personal story with yin and yang. How have these energies shaped and supported your life as an athlete and even as a professional.

Coach Jo  11:23
So, you know, it does start far back. I was put as a dancer and I was worn, I was put into Christmas dresses, a brand new Christmas dress every year I was but I was the kid who wanted to go climb the trees and make tree forts and push my brother out the window like I didn't want to have anything to do with looking pretty, where I noticed some of my other cousins, because we were all raised together, some of my cousins like they were so much more feminine than I was, or as you would per like say, they were girly girls. I was never a girly girl. I knew that inside, and then that led me to leave kind of dance, realizing that a) first if my last solo I did in grade eight was to Mortal Kombat, like, going crazy, like, I'm like, feet not even flex, like, or pointed, they were just flexed. I was like, okay, like, why didn't I get put in hockey or something? Like, I knew I just always felt like I didn't belong in that very feminine world. Plus I'm raised by a woman who's raised by a very hard cowboy, a very high achieving and very successful person in Alberta. So there was a lot of drive ambition and entrepreneurialism in my family, and that was also put down onto me like the competitive spirit, you could say. Which girls have competitive spirit in a different way than men do, but I had the male competitive spirit. So that led into sports. And with sports, I found that you are pushed and you are thrown in the mud, and you every time you feel like you found your line, of the effort and drive that you thought you had in you, you were always asked and pushed across that line. And I was always growing. Essentially, that's what it was, is I was always growing in my drive to see how far I could go, and if I really dug in, how far could they see me work harder? Aren't you looking at me, Coach? See I'm the fastest one of the lines. Like, I always was trying to push myself that way, and I found that energy carried over into professionalism. I was always like, How can I be the best front desk receptionist at Flint Oil Field Hauling? I will answer the phones perfectly. I'm delivering everyone's copies. I know everybody's names, like, I fucking was the best receptionist, like I had everything figured out, and that led to promotion, boom. Oh, she's doing accounts payroll now, she's doing a receivable. Oh, she's doing everything now in the office, like, because I just had such drive. So I think that masculine energy, no matter what it was, it took me in there. But now let's talk about like, the yin, because that is what I need to work on. And like, I even took it…

Coach Kim  13:59
But why do you say that? Why do you say you need to work on the yin? 

Coach Jo  14:04
Because I feel that I have such a resistance against needing to have all the prettiest clothes and having to have my makeup on. There's days I look in the mirror and I'm like, I don't want to fucking put on a full face of makeup, like I'm not having it. I just want to put on maybe some mascara, because my eyelashes are blond, and I gotta look like I have a face. But other than that, I'm like, I just, I just want to go and do my things and not have to worry about being so feminine. But I know that when I do get feminine energy, and I am more calm, and I am allowing my husband to be in his full masculine capacity, and I am more motherly to my kids, like, there's so much more… is receptivity a word? There's, so everyone's more receptive in my house, in with that energy, because it's a house of men, and I'm, like…

Coach Kim  14:51
You're not one of the dudes.

Coach Jo  14:52
I’m like the big dick swinging in the house, you know what I mean? Like, I'm the one in the House who's running the show. This, that we're doing this, this, that. Yeah. And I noticed when I pull myself back, and I let my husband be the man, and I let …

Coach Kim  15:06
When you let the husband swing the big dick. 

Coach Jo  15:09
Yeah, when he can swing his dick, and I just don't swing my dick.

Coach Kim  15:18
That's perfect. I get it. I got a visual.

Coach Jo  15:21
And, and if I'm more of like that, like motherly to my kids, they're so much more receptive. And I know my boys are more receptive when they're with, like, the grandmas, who are all oh yes, and like, and they're helping them this way. And, and when I come in like a fire and I'm trying to coach them on life, like my five year old, he's just like, why are you talking loud at me? And I'm like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'll turn it back. So like, there's balances. Like I love my yang, my like, we're just gonna call it now my big dick swinging and energy, my BDE. But also like, I know that when I am in my feminine form, like I do feel inspired. And I'm like, like, look what a woman can do, and a woman can be this, and a woman it's, it's a balance that I have definitely more that's leading over the other but I got to work at it. And I think it's, it's okay whichever state you're in. I think there's, we just have to have acceptance over it. But it has definitely shaped and supported where I'm at today. Without that yang, there's no fucking way. As a female, I'd be owning a gym with you. 

Coach Kim  16:28
Yeah, totally. So yeah, completely. And there's my brain goes 100 different directions, because I just had this conversation with my hairdresser, Sean, where we were talking about I was saying, you know, like there's this whole, in the gender discussion, women and men, we've had this like not blurring of the lines, and I'm gonna stumble my way through it, because I don't have all the correct terms. And I'm sure there are people out there who are way more socially apropos than I am. But the simple fact of the matter is, is that we as women have been encouraged to chase a very masculine anything you can do I can do better, right? Like that whole like women can do anything men can. And so we've been encouraged to, like, push into that and claim what's ours and build things, and we can do anything just as good as a man can do and and at the same time, we've also given permission for men to become caregivers and stay at home and assume bigger roles with family. There's nothing wrong with any of that. I don't want it to ever sound like there's anything wrong with that. But what I've noticed, even in my own relationship with my husband, is that there's a lot of shame around being masculine, and in this day and age, it's like toxic male energy. You know, all men are bad. They're all you know, and they're just not. Some of the greatest feminists I've known in my life have been men. My husband is one of them. You fucking go, girl, you got this. And anything he's doing for me, he's doing from a place of love and support and from that very masculine caregiver, breadwinner, stability, like that, that foundational kind of thing. And so when I am in my yang, where I'm trying to control and I can do it better than he can, and you can't tell me what to do, it's almost like I'm pushing back against the wrong person. And I've noticed that when I am softer and I allow him to show up in his desire to look after me, protect me, and I don't feel like I have to rise to that, he steps into a fuller version of himself as well, you know. And that's a beautiful place to be. We both win, you know, because he allows me to be whatever version of myself I want to be, and I allow him to show up in a good version of himself. So that's kind of like, personally, that's kind of where my brain goes but also in the gym as it pertains to like what we see in gym culture, like 75 hard is a great example of this. And 75 hard, for anybody who doesn't know, is 75 days, where you do two workouts a day, you commit to a diet. You do 10 pages of personal development reading. I feel like there's something else, but like a daily walk or something, yeah, like, well, or that is, that could be one of your two exercises, but essentially it is an it's an exercise in discipline and committing to the hard thing, even when you don't feel like it. And let me be clear, there are merits to that where I think it applies to this yin and yang is, I think of a client that I had in the past few years who was so frustrated because she had body fat loss goals, middle age, like, I would say, mid 30s to early to heading towards 40, couple kids. Kids and committed to 75 hard and busted her ass. God. She was dedicated and devoted, and did the whole thing. And she was so proud, and she had done this weigh-in before she started and away in at the end, and she was expecting, like you see on the internet these transformational photos where your six pack is revealed, yeah, you know, which is predominantly, again, like this came from, I think it was, um, Andy Frazella, yeah, that was, I think, the original creator, or that's who, anyways, I heard from about 75 hard, but it's again, in this very masculine energy, right? So she did it, she weighed in before she weighed in and after. And she was devastated, because when she took her before photos and her and her after photos and the before weigh in and the after weigh in, at the end of it, she'd given 75 days of her all out, feeling like she should have some massive like win, and she came out of it six pounds heavier and fucking burnt out, you know? And it's this idea of, especially women, in our ability to create and hold softness and be nurturers and be healing and hold the stress of a busy life and busy families and, you know the sometimes I think that that whole high intensity interval training now I need to add another thing. Now. I need to restrict my food and I need to stay I need to get up before the whole family so I can read my personal development. There's room for that, but not at the expense of your balance and your health, if you're disregarding all of your signals, you know, like, I really think that for a lot of us who are maxed out, we're running full hard go all the time. That's where we, Jo and I believe really, like, those big, heavy lifts are what the body needs, and we also need good, solid grounding, food and time in nature and sunshine and some yin yoga to stretch out the tissues and foam rolling and like it's all of it. You cannot continue to push and push and push and not at some point see some sort of backfire. I just don't think it's possible. 

Coach Jo  22:23
Your example was basically of someone who was hardcore disciplined, like that's where someone could crash and burn, but an example of someone who is full on Zen and potentially could crash and burn. I don't know if this is going to equate and correlate to what we were talking about, but I'm going to use my 94-year-old gammy as an example. Sure, she has her entire life, she's been a homemaker, right? And my papa would always go to work and they she had five kids to raise, so she was busy during that time. And then they traveled a whole bunch, and they wintered and stuff. But basically, her schedule for 50 years was cook my papa breakfast, and then go read and sit on a couch and then cook them lunch, and then go read or watch TV and sit on a couch, and once the kids were gone, oh yeah, and then, and then maybe make dinner, maybe bake, and then go sit in the couch and hang out. So it was a lot of I'm resting now, like, because I don't think she doesn't like loud noises. I don't think anyone really does. But she got really busy. You could tell she gets a little anxious when everybody be running around the house. She'd love it. But I'm sure she was, it was a lot. It was a lot. I mean, she had a cook for everybody. There'd be like 30 freaking people there, but like, at the same time, her life has always been about, I'm taking the easy route and I remember she gave me shit when I was pregnant with my second kid, because my uncle Blair needed to get his scooter like he needed, or my papa needed to get his scooter out of the back of a van. And I pregnant, full on trainer, one-armed this fucking thing right out. And she gave me, you're pregnant, and you're not supposed to do anything. And la, la, la. And with love, with love, obviously, but I look at her now, and her body, she is a prisoner of her body. And I mean, she's 94 years old, she's living an amazing life, but she's had many physical ailments that have harbored her to be able to just get up and do regular things. You know what I'm saying. So I think sometimes when we take things too easy for 50 years, without actually getting some yang in there where you built muscle in a fitness thing, you can…

Coach Kim  24:25
 It's just taking away to the balance. Yeah, right. And here's the thing, is that we're kind of talking about a few things in that situation. Primarily, it's generational beliefs and values. That was just the way that it was done there and totally and it was also gender roles, right? As a woman, you don't need to do that, you know, that's essentially, women when you're pregnant, that was when you used to stay in the hospital for a week after you gave birth, you know, like, so there is some of that as well, but I understand what you're saying, where you're saying, you can't always be in the yin either, right? And, and we also see that people who like sit at it. Job all day long and come home and then sit on the couch all evening long and then crawl into bed. And they never challenge them themselves to grow, or they never challenge themselves to like, communicate how they really feel. And so it's that whole passive aggressive they they are. They are a doormat. They don't know how to set boundaries like it can show up in so many different ways, right? And so that is that is just testimony to too much yang will burn you out. Too much yin probably isn't going to benefit you either. 

Coach Jo  25:33
Yeah, it'll keep you safe. 

Coach Kim  25:37
Yeah, totally. So how do you think masculine and feminine energy show up for people when they hit the gym or tackle their workouts. Like, what do you see?

Coach Jo  25:48
So on the floor, what do I see? Someone who is super yang is gonna push, push, push, push to lift and their mobility sucks. 

Coach Kim  25:58
Oh, geez. Explain this. What do you mean? Because I'm getting a visual, but…

Coach Jo  26:01
So, who is super tight all over their body comes in, and they try to lift as heavy as they can go. But their mobility, their range of motion within their joint, does not equate to the exact same thing. 

Coach Kim  26:14
I got a visual. I know someone who has got a lot of muscle mass, male, very typically male, I will say, Yes, right? You get that this prime example of this is somebody who has got, you know, they're doing all the progressive overload there. They've been a gym dude forever. They got huge boulder shoulders and big broad chest and lats that wing out, but they can't fucking move. 

Coach Jo  26:36
Yeah, exactly. And I was telling Kim, this example is that every time I did my strong first level one, or I think I did level two there as well, but it's in Toronto. Granville, he owns this gym, and in the gym like he is the Canadian or the world. I don't know if he won the world. I'm pretty sure it, but it's drug free power lifting. So he has won everything. I'm talking like he has no drugs in the system. He is, they call him the Incredible Hulk because his body, he is a monster. He's jacked. He grabbed like a 70 kg kettle and just started pressing it in front of me. I was like, Oh my lord. Like, I've never seen someone so strong. And he, when he speaks to us at these certifications, he explains that kettlebells and or if flexible steel training, which is you getting bendy under the weight, has completely changed the game of his lifts. So he used to be: “I just lift, I just lift, I just lift.” And the minute he took it back and wondered why there was a glass jar like or a ceiling above him, and he couldn't press past that threshold, or lift or dead lift past that threshold, he started moving in within his range of motion. How can I twist? How is my thoracic spine rotating? How are my hips moving? And as soon as he incorporated the yin to his actual training, he just said, he just went. 

Coach Kim  27:53
He launched.

Coach Jo 27:54
He fucking launched.

Coach Kim 27:55
Yeah, I think that that's a great example. And so I know you're skimming over that because, you know, like you're hitting all the valid points, but that is the thing you can be this is this idea that you can be super, super muscular and look like an athlete and not be able to access that strength. 

Coach Jo 28:13
Not touch your toes. 

Coach Kim 28:14
Yeah, you can have the look of being shredded and completely lack mobility, flexibility, but and even cardio, you know what I mean? Like so and same thing, we see it all the time with bendy Yogi kind of people, right where they excel at, they love Pilates, and they love the long limb stretch, but they don't want to build any muscle. And so they've got the flex, but they don't have the strength, you know? And this is the kind of concept of, like, masculine, feminine. We're calling it male, female, masculine, feminine, but the yin the yang, right? Where it's just so important for overall development and all of it is important. 

Coach Jo  29:00
So, why do you think balancing these energies and fitness is a total game changer, and not just some woo, woo nonsense. Well, how would you say that in, like, two set two three sentences?

Coach Kim  29:08
Well, because, how would I say that in in two or three sentences? 

Coach Jo 29:13
Like, boom, here's the point. 

Coach Kim 29:14
Well, the point is, is that you just can't, it's not sustainable, right? Like, we think it's sustainable to come in and hit our max lifts all the time, or to do high intensity interval, interval training all the time, yeah, or even to, like, push through our limits all the time. We see this in hustle culture, gotta go harder. Got to hit the gotta make the goals. Gotta, you know, and yeah, you can do that until you can't do that anymore. I'll also give you another example with nutrition, because we because you could also apply this philosophy to nutrition, and that is, you can control, restrict, deprive, deplete, hit the mark, strive to hit the target for a determined amount of time, and then eventually you're going to be like, fuck it. It's just too hard to sustain, right? Like, and then all bets are off. And that's because, again, it's no different than yin and yang. Like, you've got to have the balance of like, fuel food and fun food, and, you know, healthy eating and pleasure eating, and like you to go any amount of time or effort in one direction is just not sustainable. 

Coach Jo  30:32
It's like you do. You need some sort of structure with the way you're eating. If you're on a health and wellness journey, you can't just go free willy fucking nilly, yeah, but you also need to be more yin and balance your feminine energy. Where beer being more mindful about what's on your on your fork, and are you actually full? And tapping into your body signals, yes, where yang is, like, I'm doing calorie counting, and I'm going to do this, and I'm only eating this, and at this time, everyone stop. I can't work because I have to eat at two o'clock, and that's the protein I got to eat at this got to eat at this time. Like, that's It's hardcore at either ends, but what's the balance in the middle? 

Coach Kim  31:07
Yes, so good. So this actually brings me to the next question, which is like, how does that yin yang influence stuff like meal prepping versus eating mindfully, which essentially you just answered, but you know, is one better than the other, because there are people who insist that calories are the only thing that matter? Or that, you know, they can't prep their food because it's boring or they, you know what I mean, like, there's so much…

Coach Jo  31:33
Like, it's like finding what you love first, first off, you got to find your passions with this type of stuff. What do you and when it comes to, I'm talking food, nutritionally specifically, what kind of foods do I enjoy eating? We talked about a food matrix before. What kind of foods do I like to eat? What do I like to prep? What is quicker for me in the kitchen, what's sustainable in the busyness of my life right now? And then, you kind of apply all that together, because if you just only meal prep, because it's in a book, and it's this, and I have to make it what's in, like, the organization of ingredients, and I got a grocery shop for all that stuff. Like, you're gonna burn out because that's not fucking you.

Coach Kim  32:09
Yeah, and it's not sustainable. That's totally and so we're, we are saying the same thing over and over again, which is the yin and the yang of it is, yes, food quality matters, and yes, you sort of have to be intuitive. And yes, I should be looking at protein and fats and vegetables over naked carbs. And yes, I also need to be like tuning into my own hunger signals. It's yin and yang all the time. 

Coach Jo  32:34
So, what's your advice for someone caught in the tug of war between stick to the plan structure and go with the flow intuition. When it comes to food and fitness?

Coach Kim  32:42
It's tapping into yourself. And I have said this before, I know on the podcast, and I say it to my clients all the time, this is where all of the diet drama and food noise that we have inhaled, eaten up in the last 40 years is in our way, because what we're doing is we're still even with Aura Rings and Fitbits and Apple watches and step counts and calorie chronometer macro trackers. We're still outsourcing looking for some other like task button, magic calculation, and we're ignoring our own cues. Yes, those things are valuable. Yes, there's a truth to food, and when it comes to it, you still have to be able to tune in and listen like maybe you're not hungry, maybe you don't really like that food, maybe you don't need another meal, maybe you're not eating enough, but unless you're willing to look at your own thing. You know you're going to struggle because you're always going to be outsourcing to somebody else's stuff. 

Coach Jo 33:49
Yeah, I like that. I like that. 

Coach Kim 33:50
So stress is a mood killer. How do yin and yang energies play into managing chaos in life without losing your sanity? And this is kind of like a hard right turn. But stress is one of those things we just this is the second time, probably that I brought this up maybe last podcast too. We just did our survey of our clientele, check in with them, not about how we're doing, but how they're doing. And almost 100% of people talked about some degree of stress. Like either, like on a scale of one to 10, one being low, 10 being high, I would say six to eight is very average. Yeah. And so, how? What? What relevance does yin and yang have in managing stress?

Coach Jo  34:33
Well, if you're tapping into masculine energy, masculine energy says you go, go, go. You work hard, hustle culture. You don't stop, no time for a break. No, you don't break. I don't eat until dinner because I don't got fucking time to eat. I survive on coffee and cigarettes. And I'm talking about my dad, Bill the Thrill. That's a reference to you, because that's how you survive. I don't know how you don't drink water. I don't know, but anyways, like, and then you think about feminine energy, and it's kind of like, Oh, I just, I. Put myself out there. I'm not as loud, and I'm just gonna kind of hang out or whatever, like they're just two different things. And when I think about stress and me and you personally being more on the masculine side of it, is that we have to, we have to plan ahead to make sure we're taking care of us in our own self care, meaning booking massages, making sure we go get a pedicure, or if we need to, or I'm gonna get a what are these called on your face?

Coach Kim 35:40
Facials! I got you. 

Coach Jo  35:40
I've been on the floor for like hours, so my brain's a little toast. But it's also learning that I if I don't plan ahead for any of those breaks, or if I don't, in my brain, say, this weekend, make sure you do your puzzle on the kitchen table and you just relax. And if I don't think about that, I'll clean the whole house, and then the whole day I'll be gone and I'm into the next day, and I'll just carry day, and I'll just carry on over and carry on over. So like, when I think about stress, like, how can it play into it? And what could be some advice? It's that we have to be aware of what we're doing with the busyness of our schedules. We have to be aware of how much how our boundaries are as well. And there is a point for masculine energy when you do need to push and you just gotta fucking grind and get it done. Like, yeah, like starting a business, we just had to fucking grind and get it done with those months. So we just had to do it. 

Coach Kim  36:32
Like, keeping up with your work commitments, your sales quotas, your to-do lists, your kids hockey schedule, like all of that requires the the energy of, do get it done. 

Coach Jo 36:44
Yeah, exactly. 

Coach Kim 36:45
Okay. So well, and so where I was going with that you were talking about, you have to make time to plan, in time to de-stress. And I think that this is also very typical for the stage you are at in your life. You know, I do a really, really good job of both, like, but I don't have two little people hanging on me, asking me, needing things, having a schedule.

37:11
Wipe my butt, please.

Coach Kim  37:15
And so, that allows me to make room for that in my life. That said, I know lots of women who are in the same phase of their life, who are sitting totally in yin energy and and are not accessing the power of that, you know, agency to change or do or move forward in a way that they want in their life, that empowerment and the commitment and the discipline, they're like, I'm okay. It's enough. This is, I'm kind of hanging and that's totally fine. But, you know, like, the, it's value system. It's, it's also, you know, age and stage. There's a lot that goes into it. So, like, what are some of the badass, practical ways people can mix yin and yang into their fitness and wellness routines. 

Coach Jo  38:06
Well, with any fitness journey, you need to have three components, and you need to have strength training, resistance training. You need to have cardiovascular training within your week, and you also need to have flexibility. And flexibility could be mobility. Could be yoga. It could be you foam rolling. It could be you stretching in bed before you go to bed. I don't know like watching your favorite show, but that's that is really the yin and the yang. Like masculine, feminine is you need to have all three of those in there. And cardio could be you going for a nice walk in the trees. It doesn't have to be you pounding the pavement at 5k right off the bat, I think we have such a preconceived notion of what cardio is supposed to be like, and it doesn't have to be like that. As long as you get your heart rate up and you're sweating, you're good. But I also think there is a time when you are on the floor, you need to know when you need to push and when you need to pull back. Listen to your body. Be more mindful of it. That's your again, is something hurting? Is something aching? Kim almost fallen off her chair because she threw her arm the wrong way to put a phone on a couch before we started the podcast, like, when do we pull back our training routine? And when do we know we need to push and we had a whole podcast on that. But you have to blend the hard, hard, hard lifts with the stretching, taking care of yourself, the physiotherapy, the chiropractor appointments, you have to do it all, or else your body will pay the price years to come. 

Coach Kim  39:29
Yeah, that's right, and and you don't want to interrupt that, that progress. And so Jo, you bring up with my arm a really good example. So whether this is soft tissue injuries with menopause, whether this is, I've just pissed off my neck, trap, rotator and that's what this is, it'll be five months, January, 19, like I have been in it. I've spent over $1,000 1500 bucks, probably, on massage, physio, regular I've had IMS, I've had deep tissue massage. I. I am doing all the things. I'm foam rolling, I'm rolling on the ball, and the last kind of step was just at Christmas because I asked for, mini rebound. You saw my Kangoo boots if you watch any of the social because I needed something that would I'm not a runner, and I already walk a lot, and so I needed something that would keep me interested, engaged, committed, but that I could rest that arm because I'm getting enough mobility slash strength. It's not even strength training, but I'm moving my arm when I'm coaching, when I'm on the floor, and I'm demoing, I'm doing cleans and pivot swings, and I'm working within the bounds, the limits of that shoulder. I'm still doing what I can, and I also have to recognize the fact that the yin is I've been pushing for two years, doing the yang with progressive overload, tracking my training, pushing quite hard. I went through a whole series of like, pull ups and push ups and banded push ups and presses and sumo deadlifts and like all these things where I was accessing power. And now it might piss me off, but if I can bring my head around to it, this is the stage where I have to honor the truth of the limit of my body. And my body is very clearly saying it ain't gonna fucking happen. And so what else am I willing to do? What else can I do for a lot of people that unfortunately makes them go, Well, I just need to, like, quit going to the gym. No, because part of what you need to do is like, just switch it up. Lean on your coach, ask for modifications, do the things that you know you can do, suck up the energy of the environment, be with your people. Remain consistent and respect the bounds of your body. Like there's so many ways to do it. 

Coach Jo  41:45
So, for our listeners ready to dive into this whole thing, what's one thing they can do right now to start balancing their energies without actually overthinking it? 

Coach Kim  41:53
Well, make a plan. Plan for it. I always say one time a week, like one time a week, especially for my high stress people, one time a week, you should be doing an oxytocin producing exercise, spending time with your pets, going to yin yoga, getting in a sana somewhere, having a nap, like something, meditation, if that's your thing, prayer, if that's your thing, I don't know. But like one time a week, you just need to start to balance out the yang, if you're a yin person, if you're having trouble getting motivated, if you don't like to exercise, if you're not moving enough, if you're not moving at all, you just need to plan one time a week where you're willing to push into that yang energy, where you're willing to, like, move your body and push A little harder, build some muscle, go for a walk, get out of your comfort zone, follow through with discipline, consistency, right? So that's what I say.
 
Coach Jo  42:47
Yeah. And tuning in and being honest with ourselves is really where the gold is going to be. You can't yin all day, every day. Like being soft, relaxed, easy, sensual and tender. It's not going to work in your favour. This is the balance of the two, Thelma and Louise, you need both, because it's an inside job.

Coach Kim  43:02
It is always an inside job. 

Coach Jo 43:03
All right, friends, we gotta go! Thanks for being here. Share this episode with someone who might love it, and leave a comment for us. We'll get back to you. See you next time.

Coach Kim 43:05
Bye bye. 

Coach Jo  43:06
You probably got a sense of who we are by now and what our personal approach is to developing a lifestyle that creates really great health and strength. Using a relational common sense coaching approach that is backed by knowledge and personal experience.

Coach Kim  43:37
There are a couple of ways that you can work with Jo or I, one on one, when you can’t actually train here at Iron Lab. 

Coach Jo  43:41
The first is the Metabolic Blueprint, personalized coaching program, which is customized for your life and your body.

Coach Kim  43:48
We work together very closely either in person or remotely to help you conquer old diet drama and to get lasting results.

Coach Jo  43:56
Ideally, we'd love to teach you how to never buy another quick-fix diet program or app again. 

Coach Kim  44:03
Next, there is the Accelerator Academy, which is up to 12 months of self-paced weekly bite-sized lessons and journaling exercises that we’ve created to help you develop the lifestyle habits that generate a true transformation. 

Coach Jo  44:17
Find out more on our website: ironlablacombe.com/metabolic-blueprint. We’ll see you next time.

What is Perfectly Unfinished Conversations | It's Good Enough, Let's Go!?

The Iron Lab Podcast: raw, real, unfiltered, unfinished conversations about trying to EAT, SLEEP, TRAIN and LIVE a messy, imperfect life. Support, accountability, fun and authenticity.