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Humans of the Northern Beaches: We Belong is a podcast amplifying diverse voices from Sydney’s Northern Beaches. Hosted by local community leaders, each episode takes you on a journey through personal stories that delve into identity, culture, migration, disability, food and the profound connections that bind our community together.
Join us as we celebrate the stories that unite us all and discover how these narratives can inspire meaningful change in our own lives. Subscribe now and be part of a movement that embraces diversity and fosters community spirit.
All views and opinions expressed by participants in this podcast belong to the participants and do not reflect the views of Northern Beaches Council.
Hi, and welcome to the humans of the Northern Beaches We Belong podcast, the show that gives a voice to a diverse range of community members here on the Northern Beaches in Sydney, Australia. We wish to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the lands on which we are recording this podcast and show our respect to the elders past and present and any aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people listening in. This podcast is proudly funded by the New South Wales government through the New South Wales Social Cohesion Grants for local government. All views and opinions expressed by participants in this podcast belong to the participants and do not reflect the views of Northern Beaches Council. This episode discusses sensitive topics such as physical trauma, depression, and suicide.
Margaret:Listener discretion is advised. Please take care of yourself, and if you need to, reach out for help. You can find more information in the show notes. Hi, everyone. My name is Margaret, and in today's episode, we'll be chatting with Simon.
Margaret:Simon is a Northern Beaches resident and a very active community member who has called the Peninsula home for a number of years. Life changed for Simon at the age of 15 when he was run over by a train losing his left arm. Today, we'll talk about how he navigated his recovery, built a successful career in radio, and how he came to be involved in the community. Hi, Simon. Thanks so much for joining us and opening up to our listeners.
Margaret:It's such a pleasure to have you here.
Simon:Thanks, Margaret. Thanks for the introduction. That's very kind. In fact, if I could have heard that on the 05/27/1996 in Royal Doorshore, it might have given me a bit of a bit of positivity to go forward to it. That was a nice nice intro.
Simon:Thanks very much.
Margaret:Pleasure. Welcome. We're going to start with some quick fire questions to get to know you a little Some of them are Northern Beaches based, but it will just help our listeners to understand a bit about who you are. First question, Manly or Palm Beach?
Simon:Manly.
Margaret:Beach or bush?
Simon:It's a tough one because I was born in the bush, but I do love the beach. That is a tough one. This point in time, I think I'd have to say beach. I think I would. Yeah.
Margaret:What about the beeline or the ferry?
Simon:Ferry. Yeah.
Margaret:No no brainer. The It's best public transport in the world, I think.
Simon:Oh, Sydney. Harbour is the best harbour in the world. How good is that Yeah. The trip across the the harbour to Circular Quay.
Margaret:Early bird or night owl?
Simon:I was always a night owl when I was younger, but these days, I'm an early bird and it's the best transition in the lifestyle choice I've made, I think.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:Yeah. The beach walk is the sun's coming up from DY up to Long Reef. Yeah. Beautiful. You can't beat it.
Simon:You can't beat it. You get down there before the sun comes up.
Margaret:And it's free.
Simon:I know. That's crazy, isn't it? It's just the best way to start the day.
Margaret:Yep. Emu or kangaroo?
Simon:Kangaroo, I guess, if I have to choose which one was my favorite. I'll go a roo.
Margaret:What's one thing you can't live without?
Simon:Music.
Margaret:Yep. Any particular genre?
Simon:Oh, when I was younger, I loved my rock and heavy metal and all that sort of stuff. As I've gotten older, I've sort of moved more into classical Yep. Opera, musicals, that sort of stuff. A bit more of a refined taste, think. It's coming through from my father's influence.
Simon:So I've got a playlist every morning. I do my yoga stretches and I put a classical playlist on and it just gets me into a good headspace.
Margaret:Nice. Sounds like you've got good mornings. Favorite coffee shop on the Northern Beaches?
Simon:I go to Twist. That's an easy one. Twist on Howard Avenue in DY. Best coffee on the beaches.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:Yeah. And they're a good team there. Now I've been going there for years, and I've started to break into a friendship group down there. Well, took me about five years, and I'd see the same people every morning. We'd say hello, and then finally, I sat on their table one day, I think because it was busy and there's nowhere else to go.
Simon:And Yeah. We sit on the same table every morning and have done ever since. We've And got our little group and we chat about what we got for the day ahead and just trivial day to day matters or what's making the news, and it's a really good little connection Yeah. Group to, again, that morning routine, getting your day right. I've got a really good gang down there.
Simon:I love it. Every morning, I try and get down to to twist in DY.
Margaret:What's your favorite way to relax after a long day?
Simon:Probably listening to a good podcast, to be honest with you. I'm not just saying that because I'm doing a podcast, but I do enjoy kicking back and putting a good podcast on. Listening to the true crime ones or, you know, true stories. Yeah. I love them.
Margaret:How long have you lived on the Northern Beaches?
Simon:Ten years.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:Yeah. I moved here in it was the October 2014, and I moved moved across for work, which we'll get into soon. Yep. And I can honestly say, with a podcast themed, you know, belonging to the community, for the first nine and a half of those ten years, I simply lived in the community on the Northern Beaches. But for the last six months, I've actively participated in the community on the Northern Beaches, and I wished I had done it sooner.
Simon:I really wished I had done it Okay. So that's and it's funny how in six months, brought all this into the space. For nine and a half years, I didn't really know anyone. So you can lock yourself away and not be a part of life or you can get involved, and it's amazing how quickly things can improve for you when you just say yes to things and get involved.
Margaret:Yeah. We have one more quick fire question, which is what is the thing people often misunderstand about you?
Simon:I made a bit of a joke with you before off air about how people can sometimes misread my sense of humor. Like, I've got a bit of a dark sense of humor, and honestly, gets me through my life from everything I've been through, and not everyone is quite on the same wavelength as you. They might take me some people take me far too literally. Yeah. People, you don't have to take everything I say.
Simon:So so I've gotta be I've got I guess I've just gotta read the room. I gotta choose my audience. I know I'm safe with you, but but I think some people misread my sense of humor. And I'm not being serious. I'm just trying to crack a joke because Yeah.
Simon:I always say I like to have at least five belly chuckles a day. So I try to That's find
Margaret:a good prescription.
Simon:I try to find the humor in things, you know. And just try be amused by things because smiling and laughter laughter is the best medicine. It really is. It's what everyone needs to do, you know. Sometimes we forget to laugh and it's something that's very important for good mental health.
Margaret:Yeah. That's great advice. So you mentioned you moved to the Northern Beaches about ten years ago. Where was it that you grew up?
Simon:I was born over in Perth in 1980, a little place called Les Moody, which is up in the bush. It's up in the hills outside of Perth. And it was a good kid's life. You know, we rode bikes around the bush. You know, went fishing for yabbies in the creek, played backyard cricket.
Simon:Our dog ran around everywhere with it. It was a classic eighties Aussie, you know, kid kid's life. Didn't have a pool. We ran around out of the sprinkler, that that that kind of thing, you know, and and it was good. And then my dad who was he was a teacher at the time in Perth, he was a boarding house master at a school called Guildford Grammar.
Simon:He wound up getting a job as the deputy headmaster to the junior school at Barker College in Hornsby here in here in Sydney. So we moved across 1987. Now I was seven and a half, and then started going to to Hornsby South first. It was the primary school. Then when I got to year three, I went to Barker, and dad was the the teacher there.
Simon:He was deputy for a few years, and then wound up becoming the headmaster, which he held for nearly thirty years.
Margaret:Oh, wow.
Simon:So we were always living in school accommodation. In fact, we lived in the school on the grounds of Barker College for four years Yeah. In the junior school. We actually lived above the library. That's right.
Simon:We're in a library recording right now. My bedroom was above a library at Barker. Yeah. It was they were fun years. It was a tough time as well because I something that you wouldn't have known about me is that I lost my mother through that period.
Simon:She was 37, and she had a she died of a brain tumor. And she got sick, and and when we were living at the school and went to hospital here, was at the sand for treatment and Yeah. Having surgeries. But
Margaret:No. That must have been a huge transition, not just from moving interstate, but, you know, you're having a new family dynamic,
Simon:I suppose. Yeah. Yeah. It was. I mean, looking back, the school were, like, the support team around us.
Simon:Yeah. Fantastic. All of the families and the teachers and the kids, they all rallied around us. They were very supportive. But but sadly, we lost mom at the 1990.
Simon:And then came back. We took her over to Perth because we're from there. So Yeah. That was where the funeral was, and that was where we we caught up with all the family and friends and said goodbye. And then we came back to Sydney, back to Barker at the start of '91, and it wasn't long after that until my dad then got the job as the the head.
Simon:And and it was just my brother who's older than me, my sister who's younger, myself, and my dad, and it was the family of four. Yeah. That was was it. That was that's been our dynamic ever since. Yep.
Simon:So, yeah, we're in the in the school flat there until they kicked us out and turned it into a staff room. My old bedroom became mister McLaren's office.
Margaret:There you go. So you stayed at Barker until the end of your schooling?
Simon:No. I was there until year 10, and then that was when the accident happened, which we're about go into now. Yeah. And there'll probably be people who listen to your podcast here that remember that period that might be connected to the school. Yes.
Simon:For into the school. I
Margaret:remember that. Know your dad.
Simon:Yeah. There would be a lot of people that do. Yep. People listening might remember it. I remember that in 1996.
Simon:Yep. And I was I was year 10. I'd actually just started at Taramura Taramura High.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:So I'd left Barker at year 10. I was given a tap on the shoulder and asked not to come back. So it was a list things over there. Yeah. Just won't go into it.
Simon:But but, yeah, gone after a bit of mischief, you know. There's always a bit of a but other teachers used to say
Margaret:dark sense of humor.
Simon:Yeah. Well, the other teachers used to say it's because your dad's a headmaster. You feel like you've naturally got a rebel against authority. You know? I don't know.
Simon:Maybe there's something in there that my brother there's nothing wrong with him or my sister. I don't know. But but anyway, I was going to Taramurra. Yeah. And then, yeah, the 05/27/1996 was when everything changed.
Margaret:When life changed. So, yeah, you shared with us that you were involved in a train accident. Yeah. What was that like?
Simon:Oh, that was it was just a to sort of set the scene for listeners because people think, yeah, how on earth did that happen? Yeah. We'd it was a Saturday night. We'd had a group of kids that were in Wuronga Park. A few of us have been drinking.
Simon:I'd drink I've been drinking heavily. Alcohol is a big part of it. That's a lot of what we used to do back then on weekends. And and I have no recollection of of what happened, and there was no cameras on the station back then, you know, on the smaller stations. And no one seemed to remember anything.
Simon:Certainly, no one said they saw anything. And the next thing I know, the next memory I have was waking up in a hospital bed in rural North Shore Hospital, and there was a nurse sitting beside me saying, do you know where you are? Do you know your name? And so I'm nodding at that. And she says, you've just had a terrible accident.
Simon:You've been hit by a train, and you've lost your arm. You've lost your left arm. You lost your right hand.
Margaret:Wow.
Simon:Yeah. And I thought that, okay. Right. And then and I'd sort of came to a few times and drifted off and came to, and then I realized it wasn't a dream. Yeah.
Simon:And I was real.
Margaret:How long after the accident was it that you woke up?
Simon:Oh, I think I think it was about a week. Yeah. I think I think it was. Yeah. 100%.
Simon:It came off an hour. Look. I'm not a 100%. But then from that moment when I woke up, it was then a few days later that I woke up again. And I was in a room with bright lights, a lot more hospital staff, and my dad was at the foot of the bed.
Simon:And the chaplain from Barker, reverend Jeff Ware, he was at the foot of the bed too. And that's when I thought, oh, this is serious if if reverend West is up. God almighty. We had to read him a last rite. I realized then I thought, you've done it this time, Harrison.
Simon:You've got you've got the reverend here. And they were just looking at me with a big smile on their face sort of as if to say, you know, it'll be okay. But deep down, they were thinking and certainly my dad would have been thinking, good god, you know, what what what sort of future is he
Margaret:gonna have? And he had had a week to come to terms with it. Oh, It must have been such a shock for you.
Simon:Yeah. Well, for me, was in many ways, was I can't it's probably wrong to use the word fortunate, but I was luckier than my father in the sense that I was medicated. I was so heavily medicated, very strong sedatives, very strong painkillers. I remember they put me on the laughing gas every time they change a bandage, and I I used to look forward to bandage changes, actually, because you're on the the laughing gas. It was it was amazing stuff.
Simon:God, where's this stuff been on my life? So in many ways, I I was sort of in a bit of a bubble wrap, you know. But for others that were stone straight and sober to it all, very tough, yeah, for my dad. In fact, I remember when they took the bandage off my hand because when I mentioned before I lost my right hand, it was the first operation in Australia where a hand surgeon had performed a hand transplant, and they take my left fingers from my left hand and grafted it onto my right. So I've got the original thumb on the right, but the fingers and the rest of the hand is from my left hand.
Simon:So I've got no feel I've had no feeling in it. Yeah. But they did that to try and give me a chance, you know, try it was it was that or nothing.
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:So I'm I'm glad they went to the effort to do it because I wouldn't have had the life I've had and been able to live independently had they not gone to that effort. And it was an initial fifteen hour operation with very intense microsurgery and additional operations after and after that, and none of which my family paid for, I should add. Yeah. You know, it was all sort of covered through the public hospital system or whatever. It was a kid who needed help, and they all stepped in.
Simon:Wow. I remember my dad came to me years later. He said, I've always wondered if the phone's gonna ring one day or a bill's gonna turn up. He said, they haven't charged me a red cent. Yep.
Simon:You know, I mean, people pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for this stuff. Yeah. So in that regard, I was very fortunate that we never never paid for it.
Margaret:It sounds like you're very good at seeing the silver linings
Simon:in situations. I haven't always been. Yeah. I haven't always been. That's maybe that's an indication of how I'm talking now about how
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:I'm at in my life. Yeah. But certainly, when I was younger, I was very much a glassy, half empty kind
Margaret:of thing
Simon:kind of guy.
Margaret:So, yeah, when the accident occurred, you were 15 years old, which is a hard enough time for anyone. And how did you navigate, you know, trying to be a person and growing up when you had this huge adjustment to deal with?
Simon:Well, the thing was I I went into denial. Yeah. So I didn't address it. And that was what caused me so many problems later in life. It's what I'll tell younger people now that would be going through a similar thing.
Simon:Yeah. So you gotta move the head on as soon as you can. Because for every year you go by where you don't, you're putting another slab of concrete over it. And at some point in the future, you're gonna have to work through all that concrete Yeah. To get down to where you are, you
Margaret:Were the people around you also in denial?
Simon:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They were. We we really didn't know what to do.
Simon:My friends and my we just all carried on like nothing had happened. And I think a lot of that came down to the fact that we just didn't have the the the therapy and and the the knowledge and the know how and the counseling that we have now back then, you know, thirty years ago. Absolutely. It was the wrong way to go about it because what I needed was to getting get straight into therapy straight away. Yeah.
Simon:I needed to be talking to people about it and not just sort of pretending it hadn't happened, but I just went into my own sort of cocoon, just smoked a lot of weed, and just sort of pretended like it hadn't happened and just I just zoned out.
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:I zoned out of life, and I didn't really feel like I had a future. And I was happy just to sort of, you know, live day to day in my in my little cloud of purple haze Yeah. And really not think too far ahead. But if I could go back and talk to my younger self now, I'd say, you know, you need to be addressing this a lot sooner. Yeah.
Simon:Because it hasn't helped me later in life. Yeah. You've you've you've cost me a lot of time later in life, pal. Now put that bomb down and bloody go see a see a psychologist. That's that's what I'd say
Margaret:to you didn't have the opportunity for those sorts of things. And yeah. It doesn't sound like the people around you would have necessarily known to encourage
Simon:No. And I and I've look, I feel sorry for my poor old daddy. He'd lost his wife, you gotta remember, six years earlier. So he's going through that. And then his son gets hit by a train and loses an arm.
Simon:I've always said that there's one person in this world who has suffered more than me as a result of what happened to me, and that was my father. Yeah. That is my father. Yeah. So he's the one I really feel for.
Simon:Yeah. And, really, with my brother and sister, we haven't really been a supportive sort of family. It's not there's no bad blood between us. We're we're civil and we get on and we talk and we got good relationships, but we're just not close Yeah. Like other families are.
Simon:Yeah. And I've seen other family dynamics where they're they're right there for each other, and they're calling each other and support it. I envy that. Yeah. I think I wish I wish I had that.
Simon:You know? I I wish I had that. I mean, I've even seen some people who have been friends with me, and and I've said to them, you're the sister or the brother I should have had. Yeah. You really you really because I tend to think with proper support, it could have gotten me to a better place Yeah.
Simon:Sooner.
Margaret:So what was it like when you the day that you left the hospital?
Simon:It was after four months. Fact, I had my sixteenth birthday in there.
Margaret:So you missed quite a bit of school as Yeah.
Simon:Half of year 10. You know, I remember I missed the the following year too. I would have been in year 11, but I had gap year, as they say. Had the whole So year that was when I did just, you know, drop into my little bubble, and I was smoking a lot, listening to music, not doing anything, not progressing. Not and my friends were all at school going on with their lives, Getting their first jobs, you know, they're they're getting their their peas and driving cars and, you know, getting into their relationships, and they're they're moving on as young adults.
Margaret:So when you got back to school, you were starting again in the year below what you would have been?
Simon:Yeah. That's that's right.
Margaret:So you had to make new friends.
Simon:So the kids were a year yeah. I went to year 11. Yeah. But they're all a year younger than me.
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:So I've had the year off at Taranara, and it was I only went back really with the intention to just party, you know. Thought I'd miss you out on the high school parties, and and I certainly achieved that if that's what I wanted to do. And the kids were good. You know? Like, I made friends easy, and they all took me in, and no.
Simon:They were. That this was at Tarramura. They were. They're good kids here. This was the year 11 class of 1998.
Simon:And I sort of fit into the, you know, into the fray pretty easily and worked out who the smokers were, and I was hanging out with them every lunchtime and recess.
Margaret:Nice.
Simon:So I did year eleven and twelve at Tarramura, and then I finished HSE. The fact I've I've looked back, I give credit to myself for getting through that.
Margaret:Yeah. It's hard enough if you're not navigating all these transitions. But by the age of 16, you'd been through moving interstate, losing a parent.
Simon:Yeah.
Margaret:Being through a life changing accident. That's yeah.
Simon:There's a bit going on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There was a lot But going but then again, I tend to think as well looking back, I tend to think that when you are that young, that's when you can roll with the punches a bit.
Simon:Yeah. Because you don't know anything else. And and I just wonder if when you look at wars around the world and young men go off the fight, if a big part of what can really help get them into their headspace they gotta be in is the fact that they are so young they can just roll with the punches and they can take it because
Margaret:You don't think about consequences.
Simon:I don't know what they stand to lose yet Yeah. You know, at that age. I I just wonder if that's a big part of it because for me, what helped me get through it was the fact I didn't know what I'd missed out on. I hadn't seen And I just sort of when you're young, you're sort of impervious, you know, you're just you're you're indestructible. Yeah.
Simon:I'm still in that mindset. So I think the, you know, the naivety of youth got me through it. Yeah. I really do.
Margaret:And how did the kids at Taramara, South Taramara, react to your accident? I read Tina Fey's biography a couple of years ago, and she has a scar on her face. And she says she can tell so much about a person by the way that they approach her about her scar. Some people will talk to her straight away and be like, oh, how did that happen? Others will kind of wait a few months of knowing her, and other people will never bring it up.
Margaret:So do you have an experience like that? How Yeah.
Simon:That's interesting. I've I always thought that the the number was around fifteen percent who feel uncomfortable or awkward Yeah. To approach you, and they can't look you in the eye, and they shy away, and they can't talk to you. For me, I feel like eighty five percent of people are fine. They just treat you like another person.
Simon:Yeah. But for me, it was around the fifteen percent that sort of really did struggle with it. But And
Margaret:does your dark sense of humor ever want to?
Simon:I wanted to get a tattoo I wanted to get a tattoo once that said death of 15 percenters. That's how badly that's how badly I took them. I'm glad I didn't do that one, Duncan Dine in Bali.
Margaret:Yeah. Because you do when you go through something like that, you just want recognition. And so many people experience it through grief of losing a loved one, where you just want people to acknowledge what's happened to you. Yeah. And, yeah, it can be quite isolating when people just pretend nothing's happened.
Simon:Well, and for me, because I was always the sort of kid that wanted to be friends with everyone. Yeah. I wanted everyone to like me. You know, I I it took me a long time to realize that you can't have everyone liking you. There are some people that just will never like you.
Simon:But but I wanted to be friends with everyone. So for people to sort of exclude me or shut me out because, you know, the fact that I've been through it, It made me try and fight for their friendship even harder, which made them push me away even further. Yeah. Made them hate me even more. Yeah.
Simon:Just there are some people you just gotta cut the cord and say, I'll move on, find someone that, you know, will look you in the eye and say hello. That's another thing I'd tell my younger self is don't worry about the 15%. Just cut them.
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:Don't cut them. They're dead. Yeah. Just let them go. You know, just focus on the 85%.
Simon:And again
Margaret:That's a huge percentage.
Simon:Yeah. Glass is half full. Here I am. Here I am worrying about the 15%. That won't look me in the eye when I should be focusing on the 85% that do.
Simon:Yep. So again, that's, yeah, that's the lesson to learn out of that. But I remember here's a story for you. I remember soon into my recovery at Royal North Shore, I was working with a hand physio.
Margaret:Mhmm.
Simon:And Julia, her name was, and she's, you know, passionate about her job and fascinated by all things to do with, you know, hand physio physiotherapy. So this case that I presented to her was one right out of the box. Know, bloke who's had a hand transplant, 15 years old, and she was blown away. She was intrigued and fascinated by it. She was blown away by it.
Simon:And I suspect felt quite honored to be the physio working of me. But she was she was beautiful. She was lovely. And the thing I loved about Julia was she called a spade a spade. Yeah.
Simon:She just looked you straight in the eye, and I'll never forget, you know, on the the within the first couple of sessions I did with her, she just looked me in the eye straight away and said, Simon, you've got to you've got to accept me now that you're disabled, and you're going to be for the rest of your life. And she said, and people are gonna treat you differently because of it. And she said, it's it's not fair. It's not right that they'll do that, but they will because that's just the way people are. You gotta get your head around that, you know.
Simon:And and I remember I remember in my own mind challenging her. Yeah. Because I know that this hasn't changed who I am. I'm still the same person inside. It won't change.
Simon:You watch, I'll prove you wrong. But but nearly 30 later, I can tell you, if Julia's out there as she hears this podcast, Julia, you were absolutely on the money. Yep. Absolutely on the money.
Margaret:It's so true. I shaved my head a few years ago, and I have very long hair. And I was expecting to feel this inner transformation, but it's just a haircut. Nothing changes. You feel exactly the same, but everyone treats you differently just because of what you look like or what might be different about you.
Margaret:Yeah. It was just something I wasn't expecting.
Simon:No. Well, it's an image conscious society Yeah. That we live in. Yeah. It is.
Simon:I mean, you've only got to wander through the course out manly to realize that. You know? I mean, it's everyone's totally absorbed with how they look and how the world perceives them.
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:That's the world we live in. A lot of that is, you know, drummed into us from television and the shows that people watch and that that is the society we live in. You know? Yeah. It's it's is that a good thing or a bad thing?
Simon:I I I don't know. I I don't know. But but at the end of the day, you've gotta fit inside of some because it ain't gonna change for you.
Margaret:Yeah. So it sounds like you had some great support from Julia,
Simon:your hand. Yeah. She was. She was excellent.
Margaret:Yeah. But did you have any other support? Was there any compensation offered?
Simon:No. Certainly no compo, and not really money. There was no NDIS back then. There was no financial support. But as I said, you know, we didn't pay for the operation, but anything to do with follow-up services with, you know, counsellors or even the at home nurses that come around and change dressings, that sort of thing.
Simon:Any of that was, yeah, you pay for that out of your own pocket. So, no, no compensation and and certainly certainly nothing to do with an NDIS scheme where things would be paid for. I'm on that now, thankfully. Years later, that's that's been good for me. But no.
Simon:For me, I in fact, I even had a prosthetic arm at one point, and I don't remember paying for that either. Yeah. I just turned up and the bloke strapped it on me, and I walked out the door.
Margaret:What was that like?
Simon:Oh, it was this archaic device. Was Yep. It was like something in a black at it. I mean, it it was totally was it was a it was a draconian type thing that had metal, you know, wires and cords and buckles and braces and all things around it. And I wound up having too many drinks one night and losing that as well.
Simon:Okay. But some someone found it hanging off a branch of a tree in Asquith Park three weeks later with a bomb clenched in its head.
Margaret:No way.
Simon:And it wound up on triple m as like a like a funny phone call. And my mate rang me. Goes, hey. They're talking about your arm on triple m. Ring them up and climb it back.
Simon:And I said, no. No way. I'm too embarrassed. Yep. Said, I prefer it without it.
Simon:Thank you very much. And I'm glad that I did glad I'll I didn't have to wear it again because it was too uncomfortable. Yeah. Yeah.
Margaret:Yeah. It sounds like it was more disabling than enabling.
Simon:It was, and it was there just more to try and, you know, look the part. Like, yeah, now you've you've got another arm, and it was just now I was much more comfortable without it. Yeah. So I did away with the prosthetic, but I didn't pay for that. So now I just sorta, you know, stammered on through life as as best I could.
Margaret:Yep. So you finished high school at South Taramara. And then what did you end up doing after high school?
Simon:Well, I my dad was sort of at his wits' end with me, and I sort of moved back in with him. He and and he'd remarried by that stage, so my stepmother suggested that I should probably go out to Parramatta. That could be a good place for me. And it proved proved a masterstroke. It absolutely proved a masterstroke because it set up what I've been doing for for twenty years.
Simon:But I moved out there not really knowing much about what I was gonna do for my future. Yeah. My dad was paying rent for me on a little one bedroom flat because I was on a disability pension. Couldn't have done it myself. And then I very quickly sort of got into the the groove of of welfare life out there.
Simon:So I was going to the soup kitchens. Yeah. I was going to the barbecues in the park. I got to know who the street element were. There was a lot of drinking.
Simon:There was a lot of drug taking. It was it was just that was that world, you know? Yeah. And I fell into that world, the undercurrent of that world.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:And it's funny how years later, with some of the volunteer work I've been doing now, sort of come back through the other side Yeah. To get back into soup kitchens and charities and all of that. But I've turned the tables on it and have gone from someone who used it to access the services to now sort of provide support on on the other side. But, basically, I was a I was a disabled pensioner at the age of 20 Yeah. Prospect of a future, knocking around with like minded people on the street.
Simon:Yeah. And it was I'm I'm glad I did it because it gave me some really good life experience, and you meet some fascinating characters. Yeah. Know, you're really fascinating characters. And some of them, yeah, I look back and just laugh at, you know, of the things that that they used to they used to get up to.
Simon:But the silver lining out of all of this is, of course, is that is that two k wire racing radio station was on the same street I lived in, and I was on Argyle Street at Parramatta. They broadcast all the horse racing and and sport. And my friends always said, yeah, you got a good voice for radio. You should and I used to like out of the TOB and punning on the horses. That's where we spent our idle time.
Simon:Yeah. So you would I'd always be down at the tab, you know, filling out a ticket, putting my last 50¢ on a Cornell or something, and not realizing that what I'm listening to through the speakers would one day become my vocation. And as it came to be, I met someone that that knew someone that knew someone at the radio station. Wow. And I went in there, I got to meet them.
Simon:And I started to practice three or four nights a week just in the spare studio Yeah. Doing the role that I do now, which is a race coordinator, which is putting all the races to wear on the AM channel, 10:17AM Yep. For two k wise it was then. Now Sky Sports Radio. And it was about twelve months later that I gave a demo tape to the boss and I got my first paid gig out of it.
Simon:Wow. And that's the job I've been doing for twenty one years.
Margaret:Wow. So you got into it just by knowing someone who knew someone Yeah. Who
Simon:knew someone. Before logging on to all three of them. Yeah. Yeah. So that's exactly how it works, and especially in the world of media.
Simon:I mean, it's all about it. It's all about it. You know?
Margaret:And how did you find that transition?
Simon:It was amazing. And it gave me some it it really did give me sense of, you know, peace, and and and it gave me a bit of pride as well because I'd lost a lot of pride, you know. I thought it's just my future knocking around on the street with these blokes going to the soup kitchen, always being broke. Really, is this where it's at for me? And I knew I was better than that.
Simon:So it gave me a real sense of self accomplishment, and I could sort of get back to the level that I was at. Yeah. And I had some really good mentors, very good people that were now influencing me. And the old saying that you can't saw like an eagle when you're hanging around with turkeys, you know, it was it was it was just like that. So I then went into radio and got into a sort of a new group, had new friends, and got a part of the horse racing scene really quickly, and I'm just so grateful and indebted to not only the people and the bosses that have given me my jobs over the years Yeah.
Simon:But just the industry as a whole. Yeah. The horse racing industry as a whole. It's it's given me a livelihood. I believe it saved my life.
Simon:I really do believe it saved
Margaret:my life. Yeah. Not a lot of people can say that about their career.
Simon:No. No. No. I'll make sure that the bosses at the ATC hear this actually. So how
Margaret:did the turkeys, as you call them, respond to you getting this great job and moving out of that circle?
Simon:But but you know what? They were really happy for me. Great. They were. I mean, they were really happy for me.
Simon:I remember crackers raised the long neck to me on the river one day as was walking to
Margaret:work. Nice.
Simon:But but they were. And it's funny. You'd you'd always think that, you know, they don't wanna lose a, you know, a drinking buddy or Yeah. But now they were really, really pleased for me. And and I remember when I moved to Melbourne, I got a three years after starting a Parramatta, things changed with our dynamic within the the the station.
Simon:Yeah. And our part of the operation moved to Melbourne, and I got a full time job out of it. So that was when I went to the next stage. Mhmm. And I was in Melbourne broadcasting back into New South Wales, and I remember got a text message from one of my old mates, and he said, mate, I just walked into the paramedic tab and could hear you coming through the speakers.
Simon:He goes, I've made it pro. You've made it as a pro. You know, I'm really proud of you. Wow. That meant a lot to me, you know.
Simon:It just goes to show that most people, you know, regardless of where they are in their own situation, they they want the best for for someone else, you know, and they're happy for you. Yeah. They were. Yeah. They were genuinely genuinely happy for me.
Simon:So, yeah, that was the job that I've done for a long time, but, you know, through all of this, and while, you know, it all sounds good and it's been great, I have carried my own mental health struggles Yep. Because of the accident, struggles with depression, and when I sort of got to late twenties, about about thirteen years after the accident took place Yeah. That was when the PTSD hit.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:A really, really chronic PTSD.
Margaret:Were you down in Melbourne at that stage?
Simon:Yeah. Yeah. The PTSD would have sort of hit me then, I reckon. And then I moved back to Sydney after seven years down there. So I was I was about 32, I think 33 when I came back to Sydney.
Margaret:And was that a bit of a shock and a surprise? Because you said you're a roll with the punches kind of guy. Did you think, oh, I've sailed through this. I'll be fine. Or did you kind of know that everything was gonna catch up with you?
Simon:Now, that's a good you ask good questions, Margaret. I do. I do. You ask me very good questions. I I guess I didn't really know exactly what was ahead, but for me, I realized as I've lived longer, it became more apparent what I've lost.
Simon:And that's what it was. It was a deep sadness and grief for what I've lost in life and what I missed out on and not being able to be a part of these activities and watching your friends go off and do these things Yeah. And then and feeling like you're excluded from it. So that was where the depression came from. I believe it came from from loss.
Simon:Yeah. And then and then the PTSD was where I kind of felt like in my mind, and it affected my dreams. Like, I reckon 90% of my dreams were to do with that point in history in 1996 leading up to the accident. And I could hear the, you know, the the the the sorts of whistles that the birds are making in the trees around that time. Wow.
Simon:The weather patterns, the time it gets dark in May, it gets dark early, it's stormy in Sydney. And and if those weather patterns be mimicked again, it takes me right back to that point in history. Yeah. Because for me, that was the point where it just all went wrong or all changed.
Margaret:Yeah. And at what point after you started feeling that did you think I've gotta do something about this?
Simon:Well, I mean, I tried. I always tried. I've always struggled with suicidal thoughts. Yeah. And, you know, I will put a trigger warning in here, but I for a long time, I always thought that that was gonna have to be my last resort and my option.
Simon:I thought if if I can't get through this, if things don't get better Mhmm. Then that's the the end of the avenue I'm gonna have to take. But I I mean, I always wanted to help myself. It's not like I I excluded it. So Yeah.
Simon:I went to psychologists. I went to therapists. And for me, it just it simply doesn't come when you, you know, you get six sessions for the price of five. Yeah. For me, honestly, it's taken years.
Simon:Yeah. I've got a really good psychologist now that I've been with for ten years, and I still say to her, I didn't even start to get benefits until the five year mark of sitting here every fortnight. Yeah. It took five years for something to shift, and slowly that's been working. I've got a really good counselor lifeline at Bell Gala.
Simon:Mhmm. Jane Dartanian. I used to be a part of the men's group she ran down there. And she again, I say, just took so long for something to shift, but just continued support and continued talking to her. Something shifted there.
Simon:So I was like I had a team around me. Yeah. You know? And and it was just persistence for me. It just I think because there was so much trauma down there, it just took a long time to get to it.
Simon:Yeah. But now, I feel like I'm coming through the other side and can start to do some good and turn the tables on it.
Margaret:Yeah. So you mentioned Jane. Is is it through her that you got into different community work?
Simon:Yeah. Well, what had happened is last year at work in radio, I'd had a bit of a break. Not you wouldn't so much call it a nervous breakdown. I prefer to call it an eruption of honesty. Yeah.
Simon:I blew my stack one day in the studio, basically. But what what what I might what I did do was I made a comment about self harm. Yeah. I made a comment about suicide. And I because I talk about it often.
Simon:I forget how confronting it is for others. Yeah. And some people freak out, you know. And there was two people in the studio. One guy knew me well and he sort of, you know, he sort of finished, know, you'll be right, mate.
Simon:He's gave you a pat on the back. The other bloke just totally went white in the face and ran out the door screaming fire police ambulance. He didn't know what to do, you know. So he's gone and made a comment to someone at management. He's got shot up a chain to HR, and before you know it, they're all ringing.
Simon:Are you okay? And and then my boss said, look, maybe it takes some long service leave. It could be the right time for it. And I thought, yeah, the time's right after twenty years to to do that.
Margaret:Did was that your initial reaction? Or were you looking at this guy thinking, calm down?
Simon:Yeah. The original reaction was, you know, don't make a song and dance about Right? I'll get through the shift up. Go to the club and watch your footy and have a beer and everything gonna be sweet, and then wake up tomorrow and do it all again. Yeah.
Simon:That was my initial reaction. But looking back at it now, a year later, I think he did the right thing, and I'm glad he did because because as I say, it wasn't a breakdown. It was a breakthrough. I needed the breakthrough. But as it happened, I was not in a good way mentally because I was worried about my job, about losing my income.
Simon:I've got all this stuff going on, and I I was suicidal. You know? I was I was I was right there. So I was talking to Jane from Lifeline. Yeah.
Simon:And and she said, look. Go down to Manly. Go down to the drop in down there. It's called Local Kind. We're a volunteer there.
Simon:And talk to there's a group down there called Roses in the Ocean, who are a suicide prevention organization, nonprofit organization. And there's a lady down there, Kerry, Kerry Gleason, who I work with now. Consider her a friend. I went and met her. Yeah.
Simon:And then went into a room and just told her everything that had been going on and everything that had happened with work, and and I wasn't really in a very good state. And then as we're going on, she sort of says, you know what I hear here, Simon? I just hear someone that's got such good lived experience. You know? That's what we do with our organization.
Simon:We like people with lived experience to to walk with others and and to try and help in any way they can. And having come from a a father who's a teacher and headmaster, there's always a part of me that's wanted to be a mentor and teach and and bring what I've learned over the years to the table because I I dead set reckon I got some good points I can bring So I said, okay. Well, why don't I come on board and do all the training and do the modules and the workshops and everything? I've got time off work now, so no excuse not to. So I did.
Simon:That's what I did. I signed up and I came on board as what they call a peer care companion. Yeah. So anybody who experiences suicidal distress, anyone who might be bereaved by suicide, or anyone who is, you know, walking with someone that has their own problems, they just need someone to come and talk to, they come to us and you meet all sorts of people and you have a chat. Yeah.
Simon:And and that's what I've been doing down there. So
Margaret:Was that quite intimidating, or did you take to it like a duck to water?
Simon:No. It kinda felt natural. Yeah. It felt like it's where I needed to go. Yeah.
Simon:I was excited about doing it. And I thought this is a big part of, I think, why I had my blow up at work was that I just it was just Groundhog Day. Yeah. And it was the same old thing. It was the same old ruts, same old problems you're dealing with every day.
Simon:And I just needed a change of energy. That's what it was. So this was a totally different, you know, energy that I've been able to bring into my life with new faces, new people, new stories, and I've always been a people's person. Yeah. So now I wasn't really daunted.
Simon:I was really looking forward to it. And and when I got into it, and I got all my certificates and accreditations and what have you, and I was I was good to go as a volunteer, I was good enough to well, I was lucky enough, and the team were good enough down at Local Kind to bring me through the door and say, come on board and do a couple of hours volunteering each week. Yeah. And and since then, there's been no looking back. I just got so grateful to Craig Stevens that runs it down there and his team, and they are a tight knit dedicated team of professionals that really you know them, Margaret.
Simon:I I don't need to tell You do them? You do know them if you work with them too. So I just feel so privileged to be a part of it. Really privileged to be a part of it. And twenty one years ago, when I'm at soup kitchen at Parramatta, you know, my knockabout mates up there.
Simon:Now, to be on the other side of the counter helping people come through the door, it's kinda feels like I've gone full circle Yeah. That type thing, you know. Definitely. Making that rotation.
Margaret:So you work with roses in the ocean, local kind, and Moana as well.
Simon:Yeah. Moana's another one that I on one of our workshops, I met a lot of the guys that work in the safe space at the mine cafe, 1356 Pittwater Road in Narrowbean. Yep. That guy runs. But across the weekend on Friday, Saturday, Sunday, 5PM till 9PM, they have what they call a safe space where it's a drop in center effectively if you got some problems on your mind or if you're feeling anxious or if you're a young person that's been bullied or you're having problems at home, you drop in there and it's a nonjudgmental space where you can sit down and chat and have a coffee and play board games or whatever and just chill out.
Simon:Yeah. So I came on board as a volunteer up there, and I've loved it. It's been amazing. It's Moana, m o w a n a. The first two initials from Motorvale, Bollywood, Narrowbean.
Margaret:Okay.
Simon:That's the name. That's where it came because it's that area of the northern beaches. Yeah. So, yeah, there's a famous Melbourne Cupwiler that was named in a similar fashion too.
Margaret:Oh, yes.
Simon:That's a different story. But but but I feel very very privileged to work with Mel, Mel Ciprian, their team up there. Yep. I always say to Mel, you're a you're a soldier for the cause, you know. The hardest part is matching her passion.
Simon:That's Yeah. That's the hardest part because she's just a force of fury with it all. This could be very hard to match twenty four seven, you know. We all need our downtime as well, but I'll take my hat off to her because they are totally dedicated up there and they do a wonderful job. So I'm Yeah.
Margaret:There are so many great organizations on the Northern Beaches. But how do you juggle volunteer work, community work, and your your career?
Simon:Well, luckily, with radio, the hours have always been good. So I do Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday nights on here. We're up at French's Forest up near the hospital there. And then Monday, Wednesdays, I do my volunteer work at a local kind. Yeah.
Simon:Wednesdays is I was harvest day. I mean, it's a busy day when everyone gets the the fresh food that comes out. And then I do, like, a Friday night or whatever up at Moana, up at up at Narrowbean. And occasionally, if I can, I like going to the soup kitchen on a Monday night at St? Matt's.
Simon:That's a really good service they run down there. And the the reopening of the Salvation Army was on the other day that Diana and and Malcolm run, that they do the soup kitchen down at St. Matt's on a Sunday night. So I've gotten to know them as well. So just it's one of these things they want.
Simon:Once you get into the to the groove of it, you meet more people. Yeah. And, know, you get into the system, you figure it out, you see the faces, and you you learn what all the services are. But what a what a great community and part of Sydney to be able to put back into.
Margaret:Yeah. It sounds like you made a lot of connections through this kind of work. And just for you putting yourself out there, it's not easy to do.
Simon:No. That's I think that's the lesson out of it. In fact, before we sat down to record this podcast today, I was with my psychologist. Yeah. As I said, I've I've been with her for ten years, and I was talking to her about, you know, doing this podcast and everything.
Simon:And I said I said, it's just all about, you know, the connections. Yeah. People on the community. And when you give something a go, then things come from it. You know, you've just gotta say yes.
Simon:Yeah. You've gotta
Margaret:Fortune favors the bold.
Simon:Well, well, it does. And and even now, doing this podcast with you right now, came about from last year when we did that training day together. Yep. The money minded training day. It was a financially based training day.
Simon:And I was all thinking, should I go? That's not really for me. I was fifty fifty with it. Yeah. But I said, no.
Simon:Look. Give it a go. You never know. So I I gave myself a bit of a kick start that day, and it took a bit of energy to go down there. But that was when we discussed the podcast coming up early this year, and here we are now.
Simon:So we wouldn't be doing this right now had I not gone to that workshop back in November or whenever it was. Yeah. Again, it's just, you know, like Paul Kelly says from from Little Things Big Things Grow. It's you've just gotta say yes to things. Yep.
Simon:And then if you lay the good habits and the small atomic habits and the foundation of those, then good things will build up over time. But you've just gotta get the small stuff right. Yeah. The day to day small stuff. So
Margaret:It sounds like you're living proof of that.
Simon:Yeah. I'm I'm in a good space now. Yeah. Yeah. I am.
Simon:I don't even think we'll need the lifeline number at the end of this. I think I'm going that well. Yeah. I really feel like I'm in the best mental space I've been in in my whole adult life. Yep.
Simon:So it's taken a long time to get here.
Margaret:That's great to hear.
Simon:But certainly now, I feel like I've I'm at the point where I can be more of a teacher now and a mentor, and I can help others. And it is the most rewarding feeling when you can bring something to the table that helps another person, when you can see it just a smile on their face, when you can see from when they come through the door, and they're not in a good way, and then when you're when they leave, they got a smile on their face and they're having a chuckle with you. It's a really uplifting feeling, you know, it is. It's a great feeling. Yeah.
Simon:And so gives you a real sense of purpose. So I wanna do more and more of it. And I I could only say to anyone who's listening to our podcast now who's struggling or feeling like they're isolated or they shut away, come down to Local Kind. Come and see us, you know, with our organization, Roses in the Ocean, or any of the other organizations that work down there. There's there's more than a dozen down there under the white roof.
Simon:Come up to Moana, come on a on a Friday, Saturday, Sunday night up at the mine cafe
Margaret:Yeah.
Simon:Drop in and say, good day. Just reach out because everyone's friendly and everyone's welcoming. And it's the safest space you'll be in. It's no one's gonna judge you. This is the safest space to be in and Yeah.
Simon:You just never
Margaret:know been through it.
Simon:Yeah. You'll never know where it might take you. It might just be the little spark you need.
Margaret:Yep. Great message.
Simon:Yeah. So no. No. Life's going well, Margaret. It is.
Margaret:Good to hear.
Simon:It's good. So I feel I feel like I'm in a good space now, and I'll just keep this going now until the next chapter of my life, you know, I'll turn over to whatever whenever that may be. I'm I'm 44 now, so I'm kind of hoping that on the other side of 50, maybe I'll be doing more of this more full time. I I don't know. But I I certainly feel well placed for my future now, so I don't I don't have too many anxieties or concerns about it.
Margaret:Great. So I just have one more question for you before we wrap things up. So you've you're someone who's been through so many transitions. How is it that you find belonging?
Simon:Oh, for me, belonging, I would relate that to connection. I would have to. And to find a spot here in this community on the Northern Beaches, and and I'll say, I've been here I've been here for ten years. I've lived in lots of different places outside of that, and this is by far the best place I've ever lived. It's my favorite place for sure.
Simon:I I think for me, it's been in the community at the ground level. It's down to the soup kitchen on a Monday night, going up to bible study afterwards with the gang, seeing the guys down at the drop in center, going for a walk on the beach, having a coffee, helping someone with their food for the week. That is what fills me with a sense of belonging to a community because I I feel like a worthwhile member and an active contributor. And what I'm what I'm bringing to the table is enriching and helping the lives of others, and always trying to do it with a laugh along the way. Like, you know me, I don't take things too seriously.
Simon:I'd I'd like to have a laugh and a bit of a joke and just keep people smiling. So if I can continue to keep someone smiling and having a laugh and helping them on their day with with what they need, then then I've done my job and and that's what fills me with a real sense of belonging to this community and and long may I continue.
Margaret:Great. Well, thank you so much for joining us today, Simon. It's been great to hear your stories and for you to share things with us.
Simon:That's very fantastic. I I feel privileged and honored to be a part of it. I I think you've got a real future in this podcasting, Kay for Margaret. You're you're very good at it. So thanks for having me on board.
Margaret:Thank you. And listeners, if you want to find Simon, you can find him at Local Kind on Mondays and Wednesdays, down at the Mind Cafe on Friday evenings, or on Sky Sports Radio.
Simon:10:17AM.
Margaret:There you go. Thanks everyone for tuning in. Everyone has a story to share. The next time you see someone you don't know in your neighborhood, be curious, say hello, and you may be surprised to hear the story they have to tell. We hope you have enjoyed this podcast.
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