Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
You Can Mentor is a network that equips and encourages mentors and mentoring leaders through resources and relationships to love God, love others, and make disciples in their own community. We want to see Christian mentors thrive.
We want to hear from you! Send any mentoring questions to hello@youcanmentor.com, and we'll answer them on our podcast. We want to help you become the best possible mentor you can be. Also, if you are a mentoring organization, church, or non-profit, connect with us to join our mentoring network or to be spotlighted on our show.
Please find out more at www.youcanmentor.com or find us on social media. You will find more resources on our website to help equip and encourage mentors. We have downloadable resources, cohort opportunities, and an opportunity to build relationships with other Christian mentoring leaders.
You can mentor is a podcast about the power of building relationships with kids from hard places in the name of Jesus. Every episode will help you overcome common mentoring obstacles and give you the confidence you need to invest into the lives of others. Find out more at youcanmentor.com or find us on social media. You can mentor. Welcome to the You can mentor podcast.
Speaker 1:This is Zach. I'm here with Derek Sire who looks really cool today.
Speaker 2:If if those of you that are listening via Spotify or I what is it? IPodcast. What is it? IPodcast.
Speaker 1:I think it's just podcast. Yeah. It's just podcast. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I am fresh out of the garden with a backwards hat on. I think the hat is fooling, Zach. Like
Speaker 1:The hat's throwing me for a loop. The hat's throwing me for a loop. And, like, a big question I have, I think we've talked about this on the podcast, is when are you too old to wear
Speaker 2:a backwards hat? We have. We have. I think there's a sweet spot that you have to also consider the rest of the human and not just the hat. Right?
Speaker 2:So we talked about the shorts with the tube socks with the shirt tucked in, stretching in random places, talking about the weather. Like, once you put all that together with a backwards hat, it's like, you're officially old.
Speaker 1:You're old. But there's something that is very special about a little bit of gray. Not not fully gray. Like, once you're full gray, you can't wear a backwards hat. I I'm but when there's a little bit when there's a little bit of gray with the backwards hat, I just think there's something special about that.
Speaker 2:I'm a rock it then, man. And I'm I'm a send people your email. I'll be like, hey. Listen to this podcast. You can just email.
Speaker 2:He told me I could rap the backwards cat.
Speaker 1:Man, I hope your wife doesn't, like, get on to me if she hates the hat.
Speaker 2:Because all I need is one. All I need is that is it. That's all I need. One person compliment me, and I'm like I'm never washing this shirt again.
Speaker 1:It's a good one. Alright. Today, we're talking about something kind of, crazy, kinda controversial, perhaps. It's a it's a strong topic. It's a big topic, and we're talking about sharing the gospel in mentoring relationships.
Speaker 1:And I know we've kinda talked about this earlier in the podcast series. We've got two or three episodes, about the importance of sharing the gospel, how to share the gospel. But Derrick and I were having a conversation yesterday. And for those of you guys who don't know, Derrick and I are different people. We're not the same.
Speaker 1:We're not, like, guiding the holy spirit. Yeah. But, like, we are we have different opinions. We have different backgrounds. We have different philosophies of how to mentor Yeah.
Speaker 1:Which is why I like having him on because there's more than one way to mentor a kid. Every kid is different. Every family is different. Every city is different. Every context is different.
Speaker 1:And thus, we don't need a one size fits all, here's how to mentor, but instead we need to follow the spirit and be wise and discerning and apply certain kinds of, like, hey. Here are the main things, but everything else can kinda be morphed and shaped and whatnot in regards to your mentoring relationship. So so, Derrick, just tell tell the people what we talked about yesterday, and I'm I'm just gonna set us up. You said something along the lines of, Zach, I think you're too much of a Christian for me.
Speaker 2:I was like, I
Speaker 1:You said something like that. You said something like that.
Speaker 2:Don't say that. I said I said, Zach, I think you are more saved than I am.
Speaker 1:That's it. More saved.
Speaker 2:I am not that saved, Zach. Let me let me load let me load this up. And so, Zach and I, have known each other, going on, four or five years now. And, he's brought me into the You Can Mentor family, and I'm meeting people, and I'm attending the gatherings. By the way, if you're listening to this and you are a a mentoring organization leader, a Christian mentoring organization leader, or you're leading a mentoring organization and you're a Christian, you really need to find your way to the gathering.
Speaker 2:It's a wonderful experience. It's a three to four day experience depending on, you know, how you how you make it. But you get together around other leaders. There's worship. There are breakout sessions.
Speaker 2:There's q and a. You walk away with a lot of not only fundamental and immediately applicable tips, but, great relationships in the mentoring. Zachary and I have known each other for a while now and we are, dreaming and exploring on how to collaborate more and how to get, Christian Mentoring across the country. And, you know, the the next closest state in my opinion is Oklahoma. And I'm an Oklahoma's doctor then in Texas, and I'm trying to get him here.
Speaker 2:So we're talking about how we can collaborate and do some really cool stuff. And I was like, Zachary, I just don't know if we mentor the same. I think you're way more saved than I am. And a lot of your conversations, believe, are saturated with Jesus and kingdom as it pertains to mentoring. And Zach hit me with a a bombshell.
Speaker 2:And I absolutely love this and it opened my eyes really, really wide. He said, Derrick, I lead with relationship too. I lead with relationship too. And I don't know why that shocked me so much. I think we ended up deciding.
Speaker 2:It's because I see Zach a lot as it pertains to leaders and organizational things. And when you have a bunch of Christian leaders in a room, then of course you get to speak very directly and plainly to what we're doing or why we're doing it. But there there requires some strategy once you get out into the world and you get in your community. And so I think that's the kind of where we're gonna direct our conversation today is we are Christian. We love God.
Speaker 2:We believe that he's the best thing before a slag spread. And we want to spread our love and our joy about something that we hold so near and dear, and we just happen to be really, really good mentoring mentors. And so it puts the two together, but there's also some strategy when you are in places where people don't necessarily, want you to be that direct or you're trying to navigate it, there's funding or all these different things. And so the question we have today is when does Christ come up? When mentoring, how do we introduce him into the conversation?
Speaker 2:And then how can we build relationship without necessarily hiding him or being ashamed or being secret about I don't know, Zach. Like, I don't wanna jump into this today.
Speaker 1:Man, I think that that's so true, Derrick. I mean, obviously, we wanna, you know, talk about Jesus. We're all about salvation. We we want these kids to experience the person of Jesus Christ more than anything, But we also need to be wise. Right?
Speaker 1:Like, we need to understand their context. We need to understand their stories. We don't wanna, like, kick the door in with the gospel and, like, make them, feel like, we're trying to pressure them or if they don't, like, agree or sign up with what we say, like, spot on, then there's something wrong with them. And so, like, I think that there really is this, like, how do we, you know, walk in the spirit? How do we engage these people, these kiddos, right, who, come from different contexts, who have different stories, who may or may not have even ever heard of Jesus or experienced, anything that has to do with him, like church or anything like that?
Speaker 1:Like, how do we be good stewards of the relationship? How do we let the spirit lead? How do we, you know, not, like, be fearful of sharing the name of Christ, how do we, do all of those things without pushing away this kid while, like, respecting their stories, respecting where they come from, their cultures, all of these things. And so, I mean, we, more than anything, we we want this kid to experience Jesus. But how we go about it, I think, is the most important thing.
Speaker 1:And I think so often, right, like, we can, lead with fear. I think so often, we can, like, feel like, oh, man. If I don't share the gospel with this kid today, then they're gonna, you know, then they're gonna go to hell. And I just don't know how productive that is. I don't know if that's how Jesus would do it.
Speaker 1:I I don't know if that's how Jesus did it. Because if you look at what Jesus did and if you look at how he started his ministry, how he did his ministry, I mean, it was very relational. I mean, he went over to people's houses. He went to those who were in need. Zacchaeus, you know, the tax collectors, like, he he didn't just, like, come in and just, like, start, like, putting the pressure on people to, get saved.
Speaker 1:You know? Like, he he very much did it in a way that was relational to those who didn't know him. Now to the religious, he did do that. But to those who didn't know him, which if you're mentoring kids from hard places, that's that's usually the context that you're in. Like, you this is not evangelism.
Speaker 1:This is you meeting a kid where he's at and allowing the spirit to lead. And I don't know. It's a tough man. It is it's a very I don't have the answers. We don't have the answers.
Speaker 1:So we're just having a conversation today. So so I think that's where I'm landing today.
Speaker 2:And I think I think it it can't be lost in us that I'm not sure how accurate this is, but word on the street is the disciples were were young young men, and he got them at a very impressionable age to where they were they had some independence and they were contributing and they were active and had some sense of identity, but he was taking them to another level. And I think that's really important because we have to I think the way that I mentor, I gotta get to know someone's story before I try to help them write it. Right? It's like, I think sometimes we come in, we feel like we got the answer, and we feel like we know, you know, what it is, but I said this a bunch of times. We gotta be curious about people.
Speaker 2:And I, you know, I was talking to a I was talking to a pastor in here in Oklahoma City and he he helps churches launch. And so when they're planning a church and, you they're launching, he comes in and he talks about these really cool things. He said that there are three primary components to any successful church. He said, one is good preaching. Number two is great worship.
Speaker 2:Number three, you gotta be able to serve kids and families. And he said, there are churches that serve kids and families really, really well, but they don't have great worship or great preaching. You got some churches that have really great preaching, but they don't have the word you know, all these components. And so it's like, as we are trying to meet people where they are, we have to figure out what's the hook. Like, what are they interested in?
Speaker 2:And and this is why interest based mentoring is so effective. It's like when you find some something in common with a young person that is trying to develop and figure out who they are and make the right decisions, well, then through relationship, through curiosity, through transferred trust, you get an opportunity to open conversations and have conversations and to give advice and steering guide in a way that is uniquely more easy and more effective than if you don't. Right? And and I think that's where a bulk if I am talking about the way that I'm into, I spend a large chunk of my time in that space, figuring out who they are, being in their space, meeting their friends, learning about their interest. And through that consistency and and my faithfulness to them, my consistency, then I get to have other conversations that I don't think I would have been able to have had I not invested that much up front.
Speaker 1:I mean, that's so good. I just love that saying that you said, I wanna help them know their own story before I help them write their story. That's it. I need to learn their story before I help them write it. And, man, I I just think that, like and I'm not 100% sure what I mean when I say this, but I think potentially, like well, I'll say this.
Speaker 1:Timing seems to be kinda everything. And getting to know someone and, like, earning the right to be heard, earning trust, especially if there's differences. So that right? Like, especially if there's different social classes, different kinds of race. Like, the last thing that we want this kid to feel is that we're kinda trying to come and fix them.
Speaker 1:But, like, time is the currency here because time builds relationship, time builds trust, and time gets them to open up their heart. And especially with kids who have experienced trauma, especially kids who have experienced hard things. Right? Like, if you're talking to a kid, you know, who has, quote, unquote, had kind of a perfect life, then, like, they might be really open to allowing you into their heart first day. But for the kids that we serve, probably not.
Speaker 1:But I just think that sometimes out of fear, like, oh my gosh. If I don't share the gospel with this kid today, they're gonna die and go to hell. Brett. And I think that that's important because and this is an inside job. Like, this is me, like, assessing my heart and my motives.
Speaker 1:And so and this is a conversation that I need to be having with god. Right? Like, lord, like, here's a kid, and he obviously doesn't know you. And I'm scared, Lord, that, like, if I don't tell him about you, then what's gonna happen? I think this is a really good opportunity for us to walk step in in step with the holy spirit here because sometimes you might say, hey, man.
Speaker 1:Why don't you give your testimony? Or, hey, man. Why don't you wait and ask some questions? Or, hey, man. Why don't you spend some time in prayer?
Speaker 1:Like, there's a number of ways that we can go about dealing with that fear. But I think the problem comes when we don't stop and assess our hearts and or stop and really ask ourselves, are we in touch with the holy spirit here? Are are we wanting our will to be done or his will to be done? Because god is very rarely in a hurry, but he's never late. Right?
Speaker 1:And so and so so often, he's doing things that we don't even know in the background in this kid's heart that we can't see, but we're so like, whether it's out of fear or out of insecurity or sometimes it's even out of pride. Like, I wanna share the gospel with this kid so I can get a notch in my belt that I got to baptize him or that I got to, you know, da da da. And so I don't know. But I just wonder, like, when Jesus called the disciples, like, those first couple conversations, those first couple days together, like, what do you think they were talking about?
Speaker 2:Man, I I don't know. Like, it feels very it feels very relational. Right? I know I know that, you know, when you meet somebody, there's something special about them that you gravitate towards, you know, And I'm sure the kids would say Jesus' aura was on 10, you know, during during that time. But it's it's like there's there's lots of conversation.
Speaker 2:It's it's almost like he's I had a guy who loves fishing. He's one of my my friends, one of my mentors actually, and he talks about setting the hook in mentoring. And for those of you that are fishermen out there, I'm I'm not a fisherman at all. But he talks about if you set if you set a hook in a fish, then you can literally let that fish just tire itself out. You know, like, if it's a big one, it'll it'll go around the boat, it'll jig in his egg, and, you know, you'll just reel, but then if it pulls, you let give it some slack.
Speaker 2:He talks about setting the hook early in a mentoring relationship. And if I can if I can set something in their mind to let them know what I'm here for and what my intent is, That happens through conversation. And I think I think that probably happened with Jesus and his his his disciples. I think he somehow, he set a hook early. You know, you think about you see somebody fishing and they're, you know, not having a great day.
Speaker 2:And, you know, Jesus says, they go back out, throw it to throw it on the other side. He's like, I mean, I already did help you. Just trust me. Goes back out, throws it to the other side, looks back at Jesus. Jesus is like, you wanna no.
Speaker 2:You pull you pull some fish in. You wanna be fishing them in? And he like, yo. That's dope. Like, okay.
Speaker 2:Listen. Let me pull this fish in. Let me take it back to and then I'm a follow you. Like, I think there's this there was something that was approachable, was very conversational, that was knowledgeable, that was current. He was a contemporary.
Speaker 2:He was educated. He was skilled. I think I think they were sitting around, in my mind, they're sitting around and, I don't know, Jesus, because of his experience with wood, as he's talking, he just makes it like a little slingshot, a little you know? He just makes this little animal out of a piece of wood, you know, because they he's he's a carpenter. He just worked with wood a lot.
Speaker 2:I think there's something that was that very unique, very charismatic, and he set the hook early. And when you do that, you figure out who they are. They have a sense of who you are. You try to build a relationship based on those commonalities or try to adjust those differences. And then that's where transfer trust, that's where all those things come into play.
Speaker 2:But I think there's something very early that happens in a relationship if we're intentional that while we are playing the long game, the hook is set and they like us and they think we're cool and we remember their names and their birthdays and their mom, their schools and sports they go to. And we just set that hook of relationship and I think that goes a long way and it buys us some time too. It buys it when we set that hook earlier, it buys us time. And I don't know that the urgency has to be there when there's trust, when there's familiarity, when there's fact that. I don't know that the urgency I don't I don't know that eternity is banging on the door when we have that type of access.
Speaker 1:And I think that there's so much to be said about just just loving loving our neighbors, like loving other people and being hospitable and being generous and being kind. And, I mean, so many of our kids today are just lonely. Like, they just especially for positive adults in their life. Like, I don't know about you, but I don't see a bunch of kids out there just being, like, remarkably encouraged by every adult that, like, steps foot in their life. You know?
Speaker 1:And especially now with, like, screens and phones and all of that stuff, just like this personal one on one attention, like, I see you. Like, you matter. What is your story? Like, that is becoming more and more rare. And I think I think the fact that it is so rare is making it all the more powerful.
Speaker 1:And so if you take a look at Jesus, I'm like, okay. What did he do throughout most of his ministry? You know, he went to the people that no one thought that he should go to. He served them. Either he healed them or he had meals with them.
Speaker 1:I mean, he entered into their world. And, like, he spent a lot of time with people even though there were so many other things to do. And it was like the most important thing about Jesus was getting them to encounter his godly character. And I just think that if we focus more on trying to be like Jesus and less on all these other things that some of them might be out of good intention, some of them might be out of fear. But if we can just focus in on being like Jesus, then that's gonna be so attractive, and that is going to stir up questions.
Speaker 1:That is going to stir up opportunities for this kid to be like, How okay. He's he's got a family. He's got a job. Why is he putting me over making money? Why is he putting me over his own will?
Speaker 1:Like, how come he's choosing to, like, love and spend time with me as opposed to, like, going and, like, taking care of his own stuff? You know? Why is he compassionate? Why is he generous? I mean, those are those are qualities that not many kids are experiencing on a day to day basis.
Speaker 2:Yeah. You know, I heard I heard of a I can't remember where I heard it. I think it was like a podcast or a video or a clip or something. And this guy said, I wonder how many people Jesus fed versus how many like got got saved. Like, he was like, I just wonder if like, feeding people is just a part of the process.
Speaker 2:I wonder if you know, and and surely enough, he's up there and he's talking about, you know, the beatitudes and blessed is the and blessed are the poor. But, you know, he's he's doing this thing, but he fed. They fed thousands of people on multiple occasions. You know, he's visiting people's homes. Like, he's just doing this very just grassroots with the people in the community type of ministry.
Speaker 2:And I don't think we can overstate enough the importance of proximity, the importance of humanity and character, because I know a lot of I know a lot of mean people who talk about Jesus all the time. Mean. I know a lot of mean I'm telling you, disrespectful, mean, will get out of the car, leave a grocery cart in the middle of the park. Like, I know I know some folks, and they'd be on the front row. And and I I think I think that's why I what's what's the saying?
Speaker 2:Something about reading a bible and looking at your life. Like, some people will read a bible, some people will look at your life, or something about you'll preach the gospel and then sometimes you'll say something too or something like that. It alludes to just living the gospel, like living like Jesus, just being like God in in the like spirit in the flesh and doing the things that need to be done, and I think the opportunity will present itself. You said something earlier about just being in tune, tapped in, in step with the holy spirit, looking for opportunities to bring up a conversation, to share your story, to make the gospel approachable and understandable and immediately applicable. Like, I don't know what the 2026 version of casting seeds and some, you know, withered and some, you know I don't know what the the contemporary needle I've cameled through the eye of a needle.
Speaker 2:I don't know what those are, but there's something and we gotta find them because on the back end of that, I believe it's Christ. I believe it's the gospel. And I and I think that's how those things are introduced organically in conversations. At least that's my piece. What the way that's the way I mentioned.
Speaker 1:Yeah. And as I hear us talking about this, I think the phrase you're thinking of is you can preach the gospel and when necessary, use words.
Speaker 2:Yes. Yes.
Speaker 1:Yes. Now I so I'm gonna take that phrase. Okay? So over here, on one end, is the first time you meet this kid, you're gonna talk about Jesus, and you're gonna, you know and please, guys, keep in mind, we're not talking about evangelism here. We're talking about relational based Christian mentoring.
Speaker 1:Like, this is our context here. So there is a time whenever you go and just talk about Jesus to everyone, that's called evangelism. That's not necessarily what it is that we're doing. That's that isn't my call. That's not my gifting.
Speaker 1:That might be yours. That's great. But okay. So there is that on one side. On the other side is this preach the gospel and when necessary, use words.
Speaker 1:And I think sometimes people can take that for, I'm just never gonna talk about Jesus. Mm-mm. And I don't think that's right. And I think the preach the gospel and when necessary in that and necessary is kind of this, like, what I wanna tab onto is there is something in the middle. I do believe you should help people experience the person of Jesus by your presence.
Speaker 1:I do believe you should create a safe environment. I do believe you should encourage them. You should learn their story. You should serve them. You should enter into their world.
Speaker 1:You should go over to their house. You should learn their parents' names, birthdays, sports, what kind of holidays they celebrate, all that stuff. That's all. I am 100% all for that. But then you also, on the back end, you need to be praying and saying, hey, god.
Speaker 1:Like, I'm getting to know this kid. I'm starting to really like him a lot, and I just want them to experience you. Lord, would you create an experience for us to at least have this conversation?
Speaker 2:Mhmm. Mhmm.
Speaker 1:And so you have to be aware, and you have to be on the lookout and be observant of when those doors when the door to his heart will be cracked. And I think there's a lot of ways to potentially crack that door. One, like, hey, man. What'd you do this weekend? You know?
Speaker 1:Oh, no. No. No. Okay. And then they're gonna ask you, tell me what you did this weekend.
Speaker 1:Oh, man. I was able to go to church and we did that. Don't shy away from it, but, like, that little hook, nine times out of 10, he isn't gonna say anything about it. But there might be one time where he's like, man, your church sounds fun. I wanna go.
Speaker 1:Or, yeah, man. This weekend, we served. Most the time, he or she won't say anything, but there might be that one time he's like, man, tell me why you do that on a Saturday. You know? Or it's just like being being open to talk about your life and your experiences, those that's like the gentle knock on the door, and it's up to them whether or not they wanna open it.
Speaker 1:And, man, I've told this story a thousand times, I feel like, on this podcast, but I had had a couple of my friends who, you know, mentored some some boys on Sunday nights. They came over to the house. They had pizza, started in ninth grade, went all the way through high school. There was 12 boys. 11 of them, like, started to get in into the bible.
Speaker 1:They they would pray together. They were kinda, like, getting into their faith. It was great. But there's one kid who didn't ever participate, but he showed up every week. And when they left high school and went their own separate ways, my two friends said, man, we sure did make a great impact on 11 of those 12 kids.
Speaker 1:But there's one kid that we missed. Right? And fast forward, like, forty years. It was it was, like, forty years later. My friend who's now in his sixties, and he's a he's a therapist.
Speaker 1:He looks kinda like, you know, like a mister Rogers. He has, a cardigan sweater. He's filling up his, you know, filling up his Volkswagen at the gas station, and he looks over and he sees this large man coming towards him. You know? And he's like, what the heck is going on?
Speaker 1:And he looks over and this guy keeps on walking towards him, and he's got kind of a stern kind of look on his face. And my friend says, can I help you? And this guy says, hey, man. Is your name Kyle Martin? He goes, yes.
Speaker 1:And he goes, hey. I want you to know that I couldn't say it at the time, but not a day goes by that I don't think about you. Everything I learned about being a husband and a and a father, I learned from sitting in your living room on those Sunday nights, and this is my time to say thank you. And then he walked away. And it was that one kid who they thought for forty years that, man, we failed with that kid.
Speaker 1:But, like, so so often, we're so, like, fixated on the fruit. Like, I wanna see this kid. Mhmm. You know? I wanna see them open their bible.
Speaker 1:I wanna see them go to church. I wanna see them enter into a faith, which, like, all of that's great. Like, but God is always working in ways that we can't see.
Speaker 2:You
Speaker 1:know? And, like and for some of us, we will get to share the gospel. We will get to baptize him, and we we will get to disciple them. For some people, we don't get to do any of that. But I tossed seed, Apollos watered, God gave growth, and God just is has he's just on a different plan than we are.
Speaker 1:Yeah. And he loves these kids so much more than we do. And, I don't know, but I always think about that. I'm just like, man. Like, if you're a mentor listening to this, you're probably or you have been or you will be discouraged.
Speaker 1:And this is not working. This is not working. But I I I just wanna say to you today, it's probably working. You just will probably never know it. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. It's rare it's rare that you get that immediate
Speaker 1:It's very rare. It's very rare.
Speaker 2:Fruit or satisfaction. And and I think we also have to be weary of the the immediate response as well because, you know, it's the the the seed in the thrower. Right? It's like it talks about sons that that grow roots and shoot up quickly and then wither away. Right?
Speaker 2:So we we are given examples of of people who are receptive in different ways. You know, was thinking about this as you were talking. I wonder how many people you think about, like, they were just on the fringes watching Jesus work. Never asked a question, never got healed, maybe never experienced a miracle, but took his lessons, went back home and were better husbands, better wives. I I also wonder how many people who Jesus healed who didn't get saved.
Speaker 2:Like, I think sometimes we associate, like, this, you know, woman with the issue of blood touching the, you know, the the hem of the garment and, you know, she's healed, I don't know what she did after she left from there. I I don't know. I have no idea. But but I think we we make these assumptions based off what we can see or what we are engaging with right now, and I think there is some credibility to wanting to see some fruit of your labor or wanting to see somebody, turn away or turn around or get up and walk. Like, we wanna see those things, but I just don't want to minimize the impact of relationship, of being really good examples.
Speaker 2:I don't want to minimize the impact of being good humans, of, grabbing a hold to things that may not be important to us but are really important to the kids that we're we're mentoring because those things go a really, really long way. Like, I think we have to lock in on the humanity side that opens the door to the spiritual component. And, I I also wanna say, you you made something you made a really good point earlier that, we're not talking about evangelism. If we are in a church setting, it makes sense to lead with Christ. If we're at a church camp, church retreat, if we're this is youth group, if we're even in a church building.
Speaker 2:You know what I'm saying? Like, if we're it makes sense to lead with with Christ. I'm talking about I'm talking about being in a space, in a school, out in the community, you're on an athletic team. I'm talking about being in these settings where you may not necessarily know, but you've been paired. Right?
Speaker 2:This you may not know, but you've been paired. You also said something else I think is really, really important. We we have the opportunity to present that hook to set in relationship. You talked about, what'd you do this weekend? Or, I have a I have a, a mentoring friend that prays.
Speaker 2:He he hooked a kid by praying for his food. He was like, what is that thing? Have you seen, have you seen Book of Eli? No. You have not seen the Book of Eli?
Speaker 2:There's this point where she this lady, they had not seen the bible in a really long time. She prays. She was like, hey. Before we eat, can we do this thing? And she's like, hold the hands, and they're saying something gratitude.
Speaker 2:The guy was like, where'd you hear that from? And she was like, oh, I heard it from, you know, a friend. She had never prayed before, never even seen a bible, but because he took a moment to stop and show gratitude for his food, she did it, and then other people saw it. And and that was just gratitude. That wasn't like, in Jesus' name.
Speaker 2:Oh, god. You're worthy. Oh, god. You're holy. There's nothing besides you.
Speaker 2:You're out there. It's like you don't have to do that in order to set a hook, especially as it pertains to building a mentoring relationship with the kid that is curious and discovering and is exploring and battling this space between, like, now and eternity and being cool and representing Christ, I think there's so much space and opportunity. And I think Jesus modeled it. He he show he showed us when to to lead with that, when to say, get up and walk. Your sins have been forgiven.
Speaker 2:Go and sin no more. And, also, we need to feed the people. I think he he he gave us healthy balance between the two.
Speaker 1:This will be the last thing that that I say before we kinda wrap up.
Speaker 2:But Okay.
Speaker 1:I think so often, like, the question early on in my mentoring days was, like, am I being a good steward? Like, am I being responsible? Like, it's kinda like what I said earlier. If I get to heaven, is god gonna you know, with with his arms folded, say, Zach? When you were talking to Derrick and, you know, you had an opportunity and you didn't take that.
Speaker 1:Like, you were ashamed of me. Go therefore. And yeah. I think about the beatitudes and blessed are the pure heart. And I've I've been chewing on these a lot.
Speaker 1:Like, man, the beatitudes are crazy. Like, blessed are the meek. Like, all these things that he lists out is so countercultural to what we're experiencing today. Like, it's almost like the exact opposite, if I'm being honest with you. And, like, we wanna be self sufficient, but he says, no.
Speaker 1:You need to be a poor in spirit. We wanna be, you know, the leader, and he calls us to be meek. I'm just like, oh, man. This is speaking to me. So blessed are the poor at heart.
Speaker 1:If you're entering into your mentoring relationship and your heart wants this kid to experience Jesus, I think you're good. And I I think God's gonna honor that. And I think he is going to do his thing when he's good and ready. And I don't think you're gonna get to heaven, and he and he's gonna be like, you had an opportunity and you failed. I'm like, okay.
Speaker 1:Like, that does not sound like the good father that I read about. But instead, I think what he's gonna say is like, hey. Like, I saw you with this kid, and I saw you doing your best. There's grace. There's a ton of grace.
Speaker 1:So much grace. I saw you doing your best to love him. I saw you praying for him. I saw you encountering him. I saw you trying to do whatever you thought was best to get them to experience me.
Speaker 1:And, Zach, I just want you to know that, like, that blessed me so much, and what you didn't see was what happened next year. And what you didn't see was because of your heart, because of your pure heart for this kid. You know, I introduced them to this mentor in college, I, you know, gave them this neighbor. Like, I just think we're so a plus b equals c, and god is so not. And so I'm like, man, if we're, one, entering into a mentoring a a a Christ centered mentoring relationship, god likes that.
Speaker 1:Number two, if we're loving this kid in the name of Jesus, whether we say his name or not, he sees our hearts. Okay. That's a good thing. Number three, if we're gonna consistently pursue this kid, whether they make straight a's or straight f's, whether they're quote, unquote good or bad, God sees that. God likes that.
Speaker 1:And number four, if behind the scenes, we're gonna pray for this kid, which, like, mentors, let's don't forget to pray for our kids. And we're gonna encounter their family, and we're gonna love them despite all these things that we might not see eye to eye with. I just think he's gonna honor that. And when we get to heaven, he isn't gonna get mad at us because we missed an opportunity to talk about the gospel. Instead, he is going to be blessed by it.
Speaker 1:And, so yeah. So that's it.
Speaker 2:I could have said that any better, man. Yeah. I think the there's already enough pressure on us as mentors to keep our word and to show up and not say the wrong thing and not offend and be sacrificial and be kind and thoughtful. Remember the days. It's so much pressure already to do those things.
Speaker 2:I think we can put salvation on God. I'm a I'm a let him I'm a let him handle that one. I'm a let the those three folks, I'm a let the God, Jesus, I'm a let them figure it out and I'm a do my part. I'm a I'm a be the middleman, the touchpoint here on earth. I'm a do everything that I can do, will do that.
Speaker 2:I wanna be available. I wanna look for moments. I wanna be strategic, but I also wanna be sincere and authentic. And I I believe if if Mentoring, if we do that on behalf of the kingdom, that Christ will create opportunities for us to share, for them to accompany us, to meet, to ask questions, for us to provide answers and insight and experience, I think the opportunities will come if we continue to hang around, if we be genuine and authentic, if we pray and be strategic, I think those opportunities will come.
Speaker 1:And they'll come even more if you have a backwards hat on. That was good. Oh, man. I'm very proud of that one. Alright, guys.
Speaker 1:Thanks for tuning in to the You Mentor podcast. Share this with a friend. We love you. You Can Mentor. See you.
Speaker 1:Thanks for tuning in to the You Can Mentor Podcast. Our vision is to raise up and invest in mentoring leaders who will launch and grow thriving mentoring ministries. We do that by equipping and encouraging faith based leaders through relational connection, Christ centered resources, and collaborative gatherings. Check out our books, come to the National Christian Mentoring Gathering, and engage with our network and cohorts. You can find all this at youcanmentor.com or on social media.
Speaker 1:Please share this episode with a mentoring friend and leave us that five star review. Thank you. You can mentor.