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Don't get trapped in thoughts of the past. Join us as we discuss breaking free from the patterns of the past so that it no longer dictates your future. And if you have questions you want answered on air, get them to us now. #PerfectMode #Podcast #PastFutue #EmbracingThePresent
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Creators & Guests
What is Perfect Mode?
"Perfect Mode" invites you on a transformative odyssey to discover the extraordinary within the ordinary. Hosted by the dynamic duo of JClay, a rapper with a spiritual twist, and Troy Washington, a realtor with a mindset of abundance, this podcast is a sanctuary for those seeking to elevate their existence. Together, they explore the realms of personal growth, mental clarity, and spiritual enlightenment, offering unfiltered insights into living a life unchained by societal expectations. Tune in for your weekly dose of inspiration and embark on a journey to align with your highest self.
If I reminded you that you are perfect, would you argue me down or step into your perfection? Welcome to perfect welcome to perfect where there are no excuses, no expectations,
Troy Washington:Welcome to perfect mode. Welcome to perfect mode. And first off, let me start by telling y'all that we love y'all. We're grateful for the opportunity to be anywhere sharing our thoughts, hopefully, in helping you realize that you are perfect. And the reason why I can unapologetically say that is because I know that you are one of 1, numero uno.
Troy Washington:You cannot be replicated, duplicated. And the only reason, and I mean the only reason you would think that you're not perfect, is if you're looking at this person on the side of you and saying, I'm not them. But guess what? You are you, and that's all you need. And, of course, it's yours truly, Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor.
Troy Washington:And I have my boy, Jay Clay, spiritual rapper and teacher, and we about to get on here and talk about man, let hold on. Before I even say this title, bro, the first time I read this title was before the show the show started. And then as the the the theme music was on, I read it over and over again, and in my head, I was like, man, this is cold. But I gotta go ahead and tell you. We're gonna talk about past equals future.
Troy Washington:Present has no equal. It has no equal, man. It has no equal. What up, Jay?
JClay:What up? Happy Sunday to all my perfect people in perfect land, jumping in the perfect mode, ready to be perfect and and accept your perfection. And, yeah, and and part of that is being rooted in the present and really understanding the relationship between the past and the future. And and so that we can can break free it and have all the gifts that the present offers.
Troy Washington:So, man, I'm telling you, when I I like I said, I read it over and over again, and I'm with you. Like, home is now. You know, we we know this. This is something that we we we kinda revisit over and over again, and I'm glad that we really gonna do a deep dive on it today about, you know, home being now. But just you wanna talk about the wordplay and past equals future.
Troy Washington:Present has no equal. That's so dope, man, more than I can even explain. But but I want to know what were your thoughts when you first saw this topic?
JClay:It is it's so many. Like, I I I I know that a lot of people invest in the past, and they invest in it because they believe it prevents them from repeating it repeating it, in the future.
Troy Washington:And then when you say invest, before we get into it, beef when you say invest, you meaning spending their time revisiting the past over and over again or studying or researching the past. Right?
JClay:Both and and more.
Troy Washington:Right. Okay.
JClay:So, like, like, sometimes I'll even hear people in relationships say, I wasted x amount of years, and there's, like, they they're comparing things to a past. Or, like, people who are in a in a job that they don't wanna be in. They're like, well, I put in so much time. It that that's in a sense investing in that past. People not wanting to change who they are even for their betterment because, you know, they they fear that I don't know.
JClay:They they they fear the unknown in a sense. And so they they're so invested in who they were even if it's to their own demise that they may not be willing to change. And I and I wanna kinda break that cycle so that people can see the the joys of being rooted in the now.
Troy Washington:So and and the reason why I pointed that out because I wanted people to understand when you say invest in it because, you know, just on the general surface of things, you you might just think that you're you don't see that the way that you look at your past or the way that you revisit your past or the way that you relive your past is a as an investment. You feel like it's always a part of you that you cannot separate yourself from, And that's the reason why I wanted to point that out so that way it's clear the pathway that we're trying to go down. And then it's, you know, the same pathway when we talk about the investment in the past is the investment in the future. How we have grand thoughts, we have grand ideas, and we allow that to take over and be the endpoint of thinking at all times or the endpoint of living or imagining, of all times. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. And and we we all have a special relationship with the past as a society. So, like, some believe, like, in certain ancient civilizations, they had it right. They were living the right way.
JClay:Like, we need to go back to that time. But then at the same time, these same people would embrace the technology. Like, they didn't know more than we know. We got this technology now. We got this.
JClay:We have all this information. So people aren't even really consistent in their view of the past. Like, were were were these humans living correctly, or were they not? Were they inferior? You know what I mean?
JClay:Like, it it's it it's so much entangled in that. But, also, people do understand the idea of becoming more wise or becoming more knowledgeable as you live more. And with that, some of your experiences haven't been seen through this new wisdom yet. You just automatically accept a past wisdom of it, and you go about your day. But, again, like, you're you're looking at the world through the eyes of a 6 year old, which could be a good thing in some ways, but in other ways, it can be very hindering.
JClay:And so the the the idea is when you step into the present and not be blocked by all of this baggage you're bringing on from the past, you can see if a real what it really is.
Troy Washington:You know, it it's funny in using the words that we're gonna say because I understand that there's an investment in the past when you make the comparison. But what I've seen a lot of times more often than not is that we are so locked into the past that it's it's it's tough to say that you missed the present. You know what I mean? Because you're always present. But the moments are not fully realized because you're you're so stuck behind.
Troy Washington:And and the funny the the the way that I like to think about it is, you know, older people, including myself and people that are older than me, are always resistant to technology. We're always resistant to technology. Like, there's always a a a better, faster, more efficient way to do things today. And the way that we combat that is we try to look at things from a negative standpoint on how things are done now. Well, back in my day, you know, we didn't the reason why you're missing the boat here is because y'all missing that step that we used to do back then or, you know, all of these different things.
Troy Washington:And then the the realization is when we finally decide to let go of that past and we decide to live in the present and experience the new technology or experience the new pathway, then you that's when you still have that that reinvestment in your past where you're like, man, if I had have known versus just saying, wow. How amazing this moment is and how easy it is now that I can now look to, build in a more efficient way that's easy easy for me. It's just kinda the way that we kinda miss the boat in that all the time. Go ahead, Jay. Yeah.
Troy Washington:Or we're way too late.
JClay:Right. And there's a couple ways that that's tied to the future too because we may stop ourselves from doing certain things based on how it played out in the past. And we may not have given our view of the past a fair shake. It could have been so many things that that went into play with that. And so when it comes to the future, I don't wanna do that because I know how it's gonna turn out.
JClay:I don't wanna go to this event. I don't wanna, do this show. I don't I don't wanna go here and and go to this opportunity because I know exactly what it's gonna be like. But, again, the truth is you have no idea what what it's gonna be like. But not only that, there there's another aspect to how the past is tied to the future is in our ability to create and manifest.
JClay:So whatever you focus on will expand. It will be very present in your world. You can be around a person, and if you focus on what you think their faults are, it's gonna get more annoying, more annoying. If you focus on what you think that their loving components are, you're gonna be more loving toward them because that's all you you've noticed, but you don't realize it by what you're giving your attention to. And if you're giving your attention to things that events that happened to them in the past, you're gonna carry those moments on from here on now with you, and it's gonna define you and define the reality that you find yourself in.
Troy Washington:So I got a couple of examples of the appreciation of things and how they expand or how they don't expand or you can kinda just overlook them, oversee them. Right? Yeah. Now funny enough, this happened to me years ago, and it also happened to me recently. Now when I came to your house one time, you know, we talked I talked about how quiet it was.
Troy Washington:Like, it's it's always just quiet, and it's because I'm I live in a house with kids. And if anybody that lives in a house with kids, you know that there's always something going on, even so much so that I had to tell them before the show. I was like, hey. While I'm doing the show, y'all don't be here arguing because I can actually hear y'all on the show. Right?
Troy Washington:Yeah. And so but but but, nonetheless, when you have a house full of kids, kids are always doing kid things. It's all good. Right? But because I look at them as kid things, they don't bother me as much as they could bother somebody else that's not used to that type of environment.
Troy Washington:And so what I mean is I could be in the living room, and my kids could just be going ham in a sense. Right? And I don't hear them. My my mind is only triggered to hear if there is an emergency or something happens or, you know, something that's not supposed to happen, like, they fight and there's a real serious fight. But elsewise, because I haven't deemed them as bad things.
Troy Washington:Now, again, I just told you the things that I would hear. I've triggered myself to say that if this thing happens, it's something that I'm gonna hear, or it's something that's alarming or something that's annoying or something to that to that effect. But funny enough, because I've also characterized or described or defined things as, white noise in a sense, I don't hear them at all. Like, they will ask me, did you hear this? And I'd be like, no.
Troy Washington:I didn't I didn't hear anything. I was literally attuned to whatever I was doing, and that is, really how life works. Like you said, when you put the focus on something, like, somebody else that's not used to or have not described or defined things the way that I've defined them sitting in my seat would probably mine. They probably would be hollering and yelling, like, you know, the entire time because it's like, bro, fam, stop. What we doing?
Troy Washington:What we doing here? But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. But what's funny is because I I'm thinking about I've been to your house too, and I I've never considered your house a noisy house. And so but but I I I will accept my house is very quiet. Like, it is very peaceful in this neighborhood. And when it is some noise, I'm like, what's going on?
JClay:They they messing up my my my quiet space. But, but but that's so true. Like, when you I guess maybe because I accept it ahead of time that it I'm not gonna be tied to any outcome when I go to your house. Like, I I'm not expecting it to be quiet. I'm not expecting it to be noisy.
JClay:I'm fully rooted in the moment for what it offers. Because, again, when you when you when you're not bringing certain things with like, we we talk about all the time. Like, you may see the homeless person, they're carrying all their belongings with them. They're missing out on a freedom of maybe opportunity just because they're they're trying to watch out for all of their stuff. Whereas you may see a risk person, they don't even have the ID.
JClay:They don't even have they might not even have their a card to pay for something. They're just out and about just free, just just trusting. And you you just notice a lot more stuff when you're not worried about everything else that you're taking with you.
Troy Washington:And and funny, you know, even to that point, the quiet is equal. You know what I mean? In a sense. Because while I'm here, even while they're doing kid things, I still look at it as quiet. It's still quiet to me, and I don't even acknowledge a different type of quiet until I experience it at your house.
Troy Washington:And the the funniest part about it is the quiet is so quiet that it's loud. So now I'm sitting there, and I'm telling you, man, it's quiet. Man, like, I'm acknowledging it so much because I I this in my mind, I've described it as loud myself. And it's funny how, you know, all things kinda can be equal just depending on how you look at it. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And I I love that you said that too because a lot of times in my meditation, it it's the sound that I hear. I call it nothingness or no thingness, but it's loud to me. But it's not an annoying loud. It's like a very peaceful loud.
JClay:And is is it and, again, that's something else you will notice when you when not tune out, but when you're not worried about every other thing that really doesn't concern you, except being truly focused in the moment, rooted in what it is now. Like, even even one exercise, I know we brought it up on the show before, is to try to be in a conversation where you don't bring up a past experience. Now I know this this may like, even in this, we we bring up past experiences all the time in this show. But when you when you're actively trying to do it, you realize how much and how invested you really are in your past, in in everything that happened in the past. Like, you can't wait to share your past experience with something even if it was dramatic.
Troy Washington:So so it's a couple things here. And and I and I I love the the all the descriptiveness that we're using to explain our even our own life and how, you know, it it's it's broken up into the parts that we've defined. Right? So the the the the next, I guess, the next part to this is how, you know, how is it? Because I I feel like just based off me being around people that that separation is very hard to do.
Troy Washington:Like, just to say, I know that my past is a part of me, but it does not dictate or define who I am or where I'm going. And so one of the things that I like to do all the time, and I think I've told you this before, I just like to do something new. And and and, I mean, something new that nobody around me has told me about before because I don't have any preconceived notion of what it's supposed to be or how it's supposed to be. And then also I don't have anything to lean on to say this is how it can turn out or this is what happened in the past. And, I mean, it it could just be little things like yeah.
Troy Washington:Again, like, whenever I go in the kitchen, pick up a tool that I never picked up before and just use it. You know what I mean? Now, again, visually, I might have seen it used before, but in my hands, I've never done it. But the reason for is because living life and experiencing things, not being afraid to experience things is always the best way to quell the past, I feel like. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and and one way too, like, one way that I was able to not so much separate, because it's not I mean, you you still are connected to what happened, but but just not be so rooted in it is understanding the role that it plays and if it truly serves you. So, like, let's say I had a problem with you, Troy. And, like, let's say we weren't cool. I had a problem with you.
JClay:This means that no matter how happy I am, whenever I see you now, I have to be mad or I have to be combative or something. Like, I I I can't be my full happy self because I'm holding on to some kinda ill intent, that I have toward you. And we don't always realize that that, like, I'm holding on to this for you. Like, why would I hold on to something ill, something hurtful for someone else? Like, it it it makes no sense, yet we do it all the time.
JClay:And when you start to see all these patterns of these things we're holding on for the wrong reasons, it's like, no. I don't wanna I don't wanna touch this anymore. I don't wanna carry this. It it it hurts. No wonder I'm always tired because I'm always lugging this big wastefulness around all the time.
Troy Washington:No. And and, again, that that the way that you explained that, it ties to everything. It's the same thing like when working out. Right? Whenever you work out, if you experience some type of soreness, the next time you work out, the first thing you're gonna think about is you being sore.
Troy Washington:And instead of just letting it go and saying, you know, I'm going to experience this a new way with the way that I feel right now is ideal. But, again, that's not something that we easily do because the the thing that's making me resistant to working out again is me thinking about how I felt in the in the past. And that, again, that's the reason why for myself, I always like to try something new. That's another reason why I I have there's there's an appreciation for reading a book or listening to a new book because it's just something new. I don't have any idea what the outcome could be.
Troy Washington:I don't have any idea how I'm gonna feel about it aside from me actually doing it in this moment. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. And, do you have me thinking of an exercise I wanna do after this, which could be helpful, is just re going over the things that I wanna do. Right? And with within all of those things, there may may be some excuses that are stopping me from doing certain things or going about it a certain way.
JClay:And when I look at those excuses, are they rooted in the past? Like, is it is it something that's that's real? Like, do I do I have a real leg to stand on with this? Why is that? Why do I believe in that it's gonna only turn out this way so much so that I'm not willing to even to try to overcome it in order to receive what I believe that I wanna receive.
JClay:And and I'm actually looking forward to doing that just to see, like, what what where am I where am I stopping myself up from? Where am I what am I carrying right now that's preventing me from achieving all of the goals that I wanna achieve?
Troy Washington:Now funny enough, my wife think I'm crazy about this because she is a review queen. And, again, people again, we will live in the past. We will live in the future, but people don't wanna live now. People don't want to experience what's new. Like, everything that you've never done is new to you.
Troy Washington:Right? And so when I talk about her being a review queen, like, I don't like reading reviews. And the reason why and, again, a lot of people would tell me that I'm crazy about it as well because you can learn something. Right? This is what we're talking about.
Troy Washington:Like, you can learn something from something that someone else experienced, and I get it. I I get the whole sentiment of it. Right? But when you look at it from a standpoint of a movie, it's not the same as a standpoint of a tool. Or when you look at you know what I mean?
Troy Washington:Like and so there have been plenty of times using movies as an example where somebody said this movie was horrible, and I loved it. Like, I watched it anyway, and I loved it. But with me seeing what people said about it, I walked into it with the want to not like, with the want to to dismiss it or to to downplay it. And because everything in me didn't allow it, which is I'm always grateful for. But it's also the same thing with with things that you purchased.
Troy Washington:Like, again, everything is not always for everyone, I feel like. It can be if you decide that it will be, but there have been things that I've bought that you might feel like are cheap in nature that I have such just a level of appreciation for because of what I expected from it is everything. You know what I mean? And so, again, I know that's future go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Well, I I was gonna say to to that point, like, because we're so vested in the past, we'll buy something that we really want, find out, oh, I didn't really want this, but keep it just because you paid for it. Like like, we're not willing to let stuff go even if it has no function anymore. We don't like it. We don't enjoy it. It's a reminder of a time we stepped out on a limb, but we should be grateful because we we learned something new.
JClay:And, like, the perfect example, it was the conference this year, like, this week, actually. And I I chose not to go. I went last year. I chose not to go this year. And I ended up like, dang.
JClay:I should've went. Like, I I have my reasons for not going that were kinda rooted in the past, but I was like, man, I I should've went. But instead of being down on myself, I'm grateful for this experience because had I went, probably would've took this for granted again. And, like, now I'm not going next year. But now I know that this is something that I do wanna go to.
JClay:I I do wanna start to be at in things. And it's it's like like like, don't be afraid to accept the the quote, unquote loss because it's not really a loss because you learn something new about yourself and and and your relationship to what you want.
Troy Washington:So so funny enough, we've this happened to me before on this show. Literally, the what you've just described is a pet peeve of mine. I hate keeping things that I no longer have a use for, but I hold on to them because of the past of like, I I don't wanna feel like I wasted any money. It's just all these different things that's tied to it. And and the reason why I'm laughing is because I looked up and I saw this.
Troy Washington:I don't know if you can see this, so you probably can't even see it. It's a GoPro.
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:This is my old GoPro. Right? And I know I don't need to have this no more, bro. Like, I I have no re I have a new one that I record all my games with. And, and just like you after the show are gonna go and look at all the things, I'm gonna go through stuff, and I'm just gonna get rid of stuff because I I know.
Troy Washington:I understand. And this is the part that we miss out on in this, is that holding on, it makes it difficult for you to open up for what's new, what's now. Like, it it doesn't even allow room for what's now. It doesn't it doesn't and and and this is something that I know I've experienced a 100%. And I know it sounds crazy.
Troy Washington:It might sound magical. The times when I get rid of the things that I really know I don't need anymore, something does show up. Something new does always come. It always happens, bro. And the funniest part about this, when you talk about the past and how it has a relationship with the future, sometimes I hold on to things like this because I'm thinking, well, I'm gonna wait until I can get such and such and such and such to replace it even though I already have something else to replace it.
Troy Washington:That's the craziest part about it. And it's it's it's it's funny the the the trick that we play on ourselves, but, again, not realize what we're restricting or not allowing ourselves to open up from open up for. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and and to that point, like, we've all been to a house or an apartment when it was ours, and it was empty. It was just it was empty. And there were so many possibilities of what could fill that space, and we delighted in it. It brought joy, like, oh, we can get this.
JClay:We can put it here. We can get this over here. I can put this up here in this place, and it was an exciting thing. And then we get all this stuff. Some of it like, a lot of it we love, but it's also some stuff that we don't at the same time that we should've got rid of a long time ago.
JClay:But, again, we were fearful of, like, okay. I spent my money. I'm wasting money if if that, but a space will always get filled. Not not only with not only in the physical, but, like, mentally. Once we start turning away from certain habits and things that we no longer want, this space is gonna get filled with more things that we do want, but we have to be willing to to let go of certain things and energies, both physically and mentally.
Troy Washington:So, again, practical, just straight to the point. One thing that we always have in my house is we don't have enough room. That is the thing. Right? It's just one of those things, and and this is something that I hear like, me being a real estate broker, this is something that I hear on a consistent basis from most people.
Troy Washington:Right? But then whenever, you know, people are getting ready to move, they always have so much stuff that they have to give away or they don't want anymore. And even in my own home, I think to myself, well, if I was willing to let go of all the stuff that I don't want, how much room would I have? Like, I would have I I want more room. There's something that I'm craving, but I won't even make room for more room by getting rid of the stuff that I don't want.
Troy Washington:And, again, just something that, you you know, show an example. I I I love, I kids teach you everything, and this is something I get to teach my my kids over and over again through some of the simplest ways. So my both of my sons got PlayStation fives. Right? And I could go and buy an external hard drive and add it to their PlayStation 5, but I've not decided I decided not to do it because I'm teaching lessons even though I'm teaching myself the lesson again even today.
Troy Washington:Right? And so my youngest son, specifically, he has NBA 2 k 24. Right? He also had NBA 2 k 23, and he also had NBA 2 k 22. Right?
Troy Washington:And for whatever reason, he always wants to keep all 3 of them on the PlayStation. And then there comes a time where something else comes out that he wants that he wants, and we have PlayStation Plus, so he can download whatever games he want for free. And so he always says, well, I I can't I can't add this, and I'll be like, well, you gotta get rid of something that you don't want anymore. Like and he said, well, I want all of them. And I and so I go to explain to him, well, you know, NBA 2 k 23 is the the older version of 20, 20 I mean, the older version of 24 and the older, you know, 22 is the older version of 23.
Troy Washington:And they're updated. You don't even need the old ones anymore. But I just wanna have them on there. Well, you can't have a new game. You know what I mean?
Troy Washington:You can't get a new game. And so it's it's just one of those things that I show him, and then when I delete the game, then he can add whatever else he wants to add to it. But it's funny that we are we start like we start that as kids. Like, why are you holding on to something that you don't even look at half the time? Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:So so two things to that. 1, I I can relate because I think the last system I maybe owned was p s 2 or something when they had memory cards or or did PS 1. I know PS 1 had I don't know if PS 2 had it, but memory card. And there's this game, a racing game where you can get a super license. I didn't even know it was possible until a friend was like, oh, yeah.
JClay:I got a a super license. I'm like, it's possible. He's like, man, it took a long time. So I was like, fine. I'm a do it.
JClay:Took a long time, like like, months or whatever. And because I got that, I never once stole that memory card away. I but I I don't even have a system. And I if if I probably looked hard enough, I could probably find that memory card somewhere just because I was so invested in all this time that it took. That is crazy.
JClay:And the the the second thing I want to bring up is we all wanna kinda, like, live different places and around the world. Like, it's it's a good thing to even think about even, you know, even in the same city. But when we think about it, it's like, man, it's a lot just to move. But if we think okay. Real question.
JClay:If you and your kids all had your wife all had one suitcase of belongings, period. Like, that's it. Like like like, each each of y'all so it's it's how many of y'all is this? 4 of y'all, so it's
Troy Washington:4 suitcases.
JClay:Would you move right now? You know what I mean? Like, I know you love your house. Is that a possibility? Or would you like, no.
JClay:I'm a I'm just I'm a still stay at this house?
Troy Washington:Well, I mean, it depends on what was the the reason for moving. Like, you say
JClay:I can move? Any reason. You you're like, oh, I I think it'd be cool to just live down the street.
Troy Washington:I mean, I wouldn't have no problem moving because Yeah. To me, I don't have a lot to take. Again, me looking around my room now, I I understand what we're discussing. Right? Holding on to the past and stuff that I don't really need.
Troy Washington:But I know that my family wouldn't want to because I know what all they would wanna take. I know what all it would take for them to move.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. I got you.
Troy Washington:You know what I'm saying? Like Yeah. Look. When we go on a vacation, I try to take the least amount of stuff possible, period. I can literally take a duffel bag, and I'd be kinda cool.
Troy Washington:Right? But no matter how many times we've gone on a trip, I try to get my wife to minimize what she takes. And she tries, but no matter what, it's still the same. You know what I'm saying? No matter how you shave it, you know, that 50 pound bag, when we get to the airport, we gotta take stuff out of it and put it in my bag no matter what.
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:And so it's just one of those things it's just one of those things where I would and could, but I don't know if everybody else would and could because we are so tied to it. And, again, I'm not just trying to put it on them. I just showed you a GoPro that I have for no reason. I haven't turned this on in 3 years. And, you know, funny, I had 2 of them, and I because I felt like it needed to do something specific, I gave it to my I my brothers came up around like, man, you need to take this GoPro, and you need to record your kids with this mud.
Troy Washington:But, again, now I'm holding on to this one for to give it to somebody else just for whatever reason. It doesn't it doesn't even make I can't even give you a reason. And there are I don't have a lot like that, but I have things, and it's still tied to past relationship that I've created that's not even real anymore. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. That that's real. And I I'm I'm thinking about my situation. I definitely will move or just go just live places, but I have more than a suitcase worth of stuff right now.
JClay:But I don't need it. Because I'm the same way. Like, when I travel, I don't need that much, unless I'm just trying to be, like, super fly on that trip, and then I just got, like, a bunch of stuff, to mix and match with. But, yeah, that's a that's a interesting dynamic too. I didn't even think about that.
JClay:Like, even in my own space of how much of the past is in here, even stuff I don't want. Like, even some gifts that were given to me, and it's like, I don't wanna let that go because somebody gave that to me. And I I feel like I'm I'm letting them down by throwing this away, but I don't even really use this at all.
Troy Washington:But you know what's so, again, we we're still on the past, and even holding on to gifts. Right?
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:When I try to think about it right now, I I I want to believe because I'm I'm big with that too. I got cards, like, like, what are those? Hallmark cards and stuff like that. Right? I
JClay:thought it was away the day of.
Troy Washington:And I feel you. Right? So but here's the deal, though. I got kids that give me cards. And whatever reason, I I'm not a card person, number 1, but they give them to me, and I feel the exact same way you feel about gifts.
Troy Washington:Right? But the thing that I'm telling myself now, whether it be a card or gift, I think people want you to appreciate that in the moment. Unless they give you something like a blender. Right? They give you a blender, let's say, multi multiuse device that you would use on until it burns out or until you get a new one.
Troy Washington:But I don't think that anyone would want you to keep a blender if you got a new one. Like, if I bought you a blender in January and then in in whatever in May, you decide to get you a new blender, I would not feel any type of way, Troy Washington, with you coming over your house and like, oh, you got your new blender already? That's what's up. I I wouldn't I probably wouldn't even say anything because it wouldn't really be a big deal. I I really believe gifts are something that are at the moment, and most of the time, people just wanna share that moment with you.
Troy Washington:Like, hey. Here's a gift. You like that? Alright. I'm glad you liked it.
Troy Washington:Boom. I don't even think about it no more. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:I I I love that. Because I I am that way with gifts. Like, no matter what I get to you, you can you can do what you want with it. You can break it, throw it, throw it away in front of me. Like, I it the the the gesture is in the moment, and I yeah.
JClay:I love that. And to that point, please, anyone who wants to send me any gifts, don't let that stop you. Send me all the gifts that you would like to
Troy Washington:send.
JClay:I I I am an appreciator of it. As you can see, I still hold on to some of them, even though I'm I'm I might not need it. But yeah. Man, it it there's so many ways. Just think if we're do if we're doing this physically, just think about all the the mental hang ups and just the just the bad thoughts or or the bad emotions that we had in a given moment, and we carried it with us now.
JClay:And, shout out to Loretta. Loretta said, it is common for people who experience unresolved trauma to become hoarders because they try to reexperience positive memories through items and do not want to let them go. Oh, that's interesting.
Troy Washington:You I'm I'm gonna tell you something about that too. You know, like, we'd like to use that word nostalgia. I think that's how you say it. Right? Is that how you say that word?
Troy Washington:There have been times, bro, where I've been riding through an old neighborhood that I lived in, and there's a sense of nostalgia. Right? And, like, you can feel like, you can kinda just feel the essence of it all. And the, the times when I've done that, and I'm not saying all the times, but there's also been sometimes when I felt it and I didn't wanna feel it. Right?
Troy Washington:Like, I it it felt it I I don't wanna say that it was a fear or there was a but there was a sense of unease in me, like, this is and and, again, there was no specific moment or anything bad happening to me, but just remembering living in that time period is just like, why would I ever want to experience? And then it it's so much so that sometimes they're gonna make you not wanna drive through those areas again. Right? And, I don't know why that is the case, number 1. But none needless to say that, again okay.
Troy Washington:So first of all, the reason why I said that is because I didn't specifically attach any memories to those moments. Right? And what we do a lot of times reason why we love living in the the the that past is because we attach grand moments or great or loving or caring or exciting or happy moments to a specific place, area, thing, and we you're right. We don't wanna let it go. But, again, the part that we're missing the boat on is, like, I love this mic.
Troy Washington:Right? And so whenever, you know, I go into the store, there's this brand new mic. It's more it has more clarity. It has, a deeper depth and warmth in it. And if I use it, it'll probably be amazing.
Troy Washington:But you know what? I love this mic so much because this one time me and J Clay made this song, man, my voice came out like, this one time me and J Clay made this song, my voice came out so clear that everybody said, man, you wrecked that song. You wrecked that song. And now I I never allowed the appreciation for what's what's in front of me to be a part of my world, and it it leaves you stuck. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:What what what actually, like, I'm I'm actually under the belief that if it does bring you joy, you should keep it. Because I I I can't honestly say that I've been in a place filled with enough things to hoard where all of them bring me joy. Like, it might be it might be one thing in the midst that's like, man, this is really joyful, but just just really think about if you were in a room with every single thing that brought you joy. That's very joyful. You you know what I mean?
JClay:And and it'll be at least I feel like it'll be very easy to to live in that environment, but it's when you mix everything else with it. The the stuff that didn't like, that that unease feeling too that it could it it could become a a burden more than a, a a joy.
Troy Washington:And and so so here's the key to what I'm saying, though. And I'm with you, though, because that is idea. Like, if I could look around again, I'm a keep bringing the GoPro up. When I look at the GoPro, I have no emotion toward this. I'm not only thing that I'm thinking about is where can I put this so that way I don't have to look at it?
Troy Washington:So that's not a joyous thought. Now the key to what I'm saying about the microphone is I didn't say one time how it made me feel today. I just said I love the mic because. And because the hands broke. But because now it doesn't mean that if I sit back and I say, you know what?
Troy Washington:Man, this mic means a lot to me now because I have a level of appreciation because it allows me to do the things that I wanna do right now. And when I when I hear myself in it now, I still feel the crispness and I still feel the warmth and, you know, people still I I still feel the love that I have for it now. But if my love is based off of that one moment, and I don't want to even appreciate what's new, and this is where we miss it at. I'm not even giving myself an opportunity because my past is so prominent in front of me that I can't even see now. I can't even I won't even I I can listen to this new mic, and I can hear the warmness and the crispness and and and how clear it is.
Troy Washington:But what I keep on thinking about is that one time on that CD when Charnae, my wife now, said, man, you go hard. And now, you know, now we married, and I love her and, you know, all of these different things that have come from it. You know, it's it's it's it's it's how we end up being stuck. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. No. That that that makes that makes perfect sense. Like, I, I understand completely because because not like there was a period there was a period of time where, even with music, like, when when we were going into clubs every night promoting heavily, doing stuff we didn't wanna do for a a possible reward that we wanted, I didn't wanna listen to music back then. Like, even if even right now, sometimes when I hear music from that time, it's like, ah, I got that energy to it just because I I wasn't living in my space of joy.
JClay:And it so I I definitely feel you too about appreciating something for only that back then moment and not now. Like, these, I don't really need these hands, but they bring so much joy to any meeting that it's just like, yes.
Troy Washington:And and see, that's the key there. That is present. And, again, you thinking about the future in it, but, I mean, it present like you'd you can feel it today. Right? You can feel it today over and over again, reliving, making a new moment.
Troy Washington:And that's and I think that's kinda that's kinda key here when we when we discuss this. And then I also wanna just kinda, you know, shift this to the future because we kinda locked in on how the past has us, you know, stuck in moments that are not present, but that same thing happens when you look forward. And you just said it, and I I can't even I I can't even remember by exactly how you said it, but it's not being tied to an outcome. Go. That's what you said.
Troy Washington:Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Right. Being tied to an outcome, but also, like, you're creating that outcome. But and you don't all we may not always realize that we're creating this outcome by being so fixated on how it's always been or how we've always perceived the thing. Like like, it can never be any other way. So I I don't wanna live in this type of future, so I'm not gonna do this thing anymore even though I love this thing.
JClay:This thing, I I it it lights me up just thinking about doing it, but I might get hurt, or I might, people might laugh at me or or or think I'm stupid because somebody laughed at me that one time. Or even though I got 10 great comments, I got one bad one. And so I don't wanna get the bad one. And, again, we're we're letting this idea of the past create this future and even stopping us from experiencing the future. Even though we really can't experience the future, we always experience everything right now, but we don't always see it like that.
Troy Washington:So I'm I'm a tell you a couple of things. It makes me think about something in the past, you know, that we overcame in order to get to where we are, but it also makes me think about how I think about the future or how I've I've thought about the future and how I know that other people have thought about the future because they've expressed it to me. And that's just you being a content creator as an example. Now if you are somebody that's on TikTok or you watch reels or you're on Instagram and you look at a lot of or or shorts on YouTube, a lot of quick media that comes out, there are they have a lot of advertisements about your presentation and the way it should look and how it should go and, you know, get this mic to make it sound a certain way and just all of these different things. Right?
Troy Washington:And those are the future hangups that prevent you from living in the now. Now I'll use myself as an example. There have been a many times where I've said, okay. You know what? I'm about to do a real estate video, and then I looked at him like, oh, man.
Troy Washington:My hurt ain't right or you know? And if I do this, this is what's going to happen. This and so what in what ends up happening is I don't move at all. I end up being stagnated or I end up being stuck, and I miss an opportunity for now to be myself. And, again, the reason why I point this out, not only because I know it's it's handicapped me, I I hear people talk about it all the time.
Troy Washington:This is one of the reasons why I love this show because there's no app for me. On Sunday, if my hair is not like it's supposed to be, I still have to do it no matter what. I still have to get on and and present because it's just the way that my life is set up. Now the craziest part about it, Jay, is the same logic for everything else does not translate for me all the time, and that's it it's it's weird that way. Now predetermining an outcome is the craziest thing that you could ever do.
Troy Washington:Now when I said I'm gonna go back and revisit the past, when me used to travel all the time to do shows, I remember getting prepared to go to Atlanta and going to a place that you were supposed to be afraid of. Because if you go to these places, this is going to happen to you. And I remember the people that were with us being afraid because if we go to these places, this is what's going to happen to you. And I also remember combating and I'm I'm telling you this because I want you to know, and I know you probably thought the same thing. In my mind, I thought, I don't agree with none of what y'all talking about.
Troy Washington:I just know that me and Jay Clay, we went somewhere, and everywhere we go, we have fun. Now, again, I'm using a little bit of past to combat the future, but I also knew that when I went there, no matter what, I was going to be me. Now whatever outcome I may have predetermined was different from what people also predetermined, but it also wasn't what truly happened. Those times when we got there, we had and met some of the most amazing people and had some of the most amazing times because we didn't allow the future thought process to to dictate our actions in the moment. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:And a a lot of times too, even with that with that story, we surrendered to the moment. And what I mean was, like, we we tried to bring the past with this because we went on these trips initially to sell CDs. And and whenever we came into a large group of people, we would sell a large number of CDs. So we thought, Cancun, spring break, let's do it. We went there, and since you got wristbands, nobody had no money.
JClay:Nobody. We tried for, like, 2 or 3 days. Nothing. It's like, oh, I I'll buy it, but I don't got nothing on me. They're not thinking about buying anything.
JClay:So we surrendered. We was like, you know what? We're not gonna sell no CDs. Let's let's have fun. Let's actually have fun on this trip.
JClay:Good time. Everything changed. It opened up opportunities where people did end up buying CDs later from us, like, once they got back to the states. It it led to us having the most fun we ever had, like you said, building those relationships with with people we've never really would have talked to or met or or anything, being in a position to perform while we're there in front of all of those people by just surrendering to the moment and saying, you know what? No more expectations.
JClay:We're here. We don't care what brought us here. Let's enjoy this moment.
Troy Washington:And so this is my question for you, and and you're right. Like, some of the relationships, number 1, I still I know you still we still have them to this day. Like, look. The real McCoy, I see him all the time, and you, you know, might not think Facebook is a relationship, but it is a relationship. Show.
Troy Washington:Straight up, though. So the real McCoy, like, that's that's our guy. And this is 20 years going right now, real talk, you know, by surrendering. But the question is, whenever you're planning or you're you're you're trying to build something, how do you separate yourself from that final outcome? How do you surrender to the now?
Troy Washington:How do you because, I mean, in when you use the the idea of us going to Mexico and selling CDs, like, we had all kind of obstacles at that point. And, you know, we could have been we could have been, defeated and decided, you know, and we could have kept on trying as well. But something clicked in us at this at that time for us to say, you know what? Let's just let's just let's just live our life. Right?
Troy Washington:How do you do that? What happens and what has to happen in order for you to say, you know what? I know I'm trying to I'm trying to get my real estate license, right, for somebody that's trying to get that real estate license or I I know I wanna do this CD by this time frame, but it's not gonna work out that way. How can I kick continue to, you know, just be me? Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. It it comes from awareness. Like, really being aware of the circumstances and and and in some ways, ease and joy. So what I mean by that is when you're aligned with what you're doing and you're fully in the now, it feels easy. Even though if you put in a lot of work, it still feels easy and, like, man, I feel good doing this.
JClay:It it it feels joyful doing this. And to give an example, actually, this week, I I was I was trying to work on something to to further these projects that I'm working on. Kept getting these dead ends dead ends. And it it's nothing I can do. Like, I've done everything I can do.
JClay:It's like, I mean, I'm waiting on some other circumstance or waiting on someone else. So it's like, man, everywhere I turn, I can't I can't move forward. What do I do? And and so at this point, it's starting to feel like I'm forcing stuff. And then I don't like feeling like I'm forcing anything.
JClay:So I kinda surrender to the moment. I was like, okay, god. What's up? What do you want me to do? Because, apparently, it's not this.
JClay:And then the idea that I got was work on this other thing you hadn't worked on in a long time. And the reason I hadn't worked on it is because it it's like a story that I'm I'm I'm fleshing out. And I I didn't have an idea for that episode. It came like that, and I just started just typing away and and got it out of me and it felt good. And and so I say, like, the awareness of of where you are and the energy that you're holding.
JClay:If you if you're being too forceful, it's not meant for you to be doing that right now. If it's if it's coming naturally and easily and, again, e easily doesn't mean not very creative. It it doesn't mean that you you know what I'm trying to say. It is it it it can it can it can be challenging, but it's that energy is, like, it's just you know it's right. You know I'm doing the right thing right now.
Troy Washington:And and and this is another piece to that too. And you you actually touched on this at the very beginning of it. It. So number 1, you know, I'm always gonna say I I'm always gonna agree with you 100%. Follow the love.
Troy Washington:Like, it it it just makes life so much easy. Just like if I had a room full of everything that I appreciate, you know, how much better would my life be? But one thing that I I I I picked this up from basketball players, specifically Lebron James, because, it's, you know, one of my favorite players of all times. But he always said they always ask him all the time, how at this age now, you know, almost 40 years old, can you still, not perform it the way that you perform, but, like, how can you still get up and do this every day? And he said because I fell in love with the process.
Troy Washington:And I always have that as a part of my mind because at the end of the day, this man can he can continue to go accomplish all these different goals, but when he was I whenever he's asked about it, he says, I never worry about the goals because I'm I'm in love with the process. And so the thing that I try to tell myself is, well, fall in love with the process of the things that you're doing. And, you you know, to the point that you always make, Jay, when you appreciate things, they appreciate. I mean, they they get they they expand. Sometimes you can do something.
Troy Washington:And, again, I'm not saying force yourself to do something, but if you've already deemed it something that you cannot love, you would never give yourself the opportunity. Just like I was talking about that mic. I can't like that mic because I like this mic so much. But the reality of it is if I open myself up to love, there's an opportunity to love things. And if you didn't love it, you may be able to find something in it that you love, or you you'll look at it from a different perspective.
Troy Washington:And if you can love the process or make yourself open to loving the process, there's always another pathway in it, I should say. Right? There's always another, a way that you can walk in it so that way the appreciation and the willingness and the the, the fervor that you need to have in yourself to go forward will always be there, and that end doesn't matter anymore. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:So so check this out, what's cool about that and the process that you're bringing up. So one, you of course, you know, I I fell in love with with the process of making music. Now I know that just from social media is a good way to promote music and promote yourself. And whenever I try to think about, okay, I gotta do this on social media, it feels like I'm forcing it, like a a burden. And and I I talked to you about it.
JClay:I was like, you know what? I finally accepted that I'm gonna find another way to do this without me having to do the social media stuff. The funny thing that happened this week is because I freed myself of that burden, I have a process in mind of how I do wanna do social media. Like, I had gave up this in a sense, by just accepting where I am, but in that, I found a way to I found a new process that I'm excited about trying. Again, I I don't know if this is gonna be the final process or if it's gonna lead to me promoting myself fully on social media, but I'm excited about exploring this idea.
JClay:And it goes to show when you just surrender to your feelings. Like, if you don't like something, you just don't like it, and it's nothing it's it's alright to not like something. And if you do, if you wanna go for something, it's alright to go for it even if nobody else thinks you should or that you're crazy. And, yeah, it it's just it's a it's it's a beautiful thing when you surrender to the moment.
Troy Washington:So I'm a I'm a say this. And, again, I gotta bring my kids into it real quick. But my entire life, bro, I've always loved basketball. Now I could have been maybe the greatest shooter of all time, but the process of becoming a great shooter, I never wanted I never wanted to do it. I never wanted to spend the time to even think about it because I just would rather just go out there and just shoot the basketball.
Troy Washington:Like, I don't got time to worry about that. Right? But lo and behold, you have kids one day, and they want to be basketball players. And so now I have to learn the process of being a shooter. Right?
Troy Washington:And funny enough, I go out and I sit and watch them shoot over and over and over again every day. Day end days on end, I'm always watching them shoot. Now this is the beauty of it. I never spent the time to do that for myself because just the thought of it then, I hate it. Right?
Troy Washington:But because there's a there's a love and and, appreciation for it now because of my kids. I love watching them do like, we went and done it this morning. Like, I'll I know every aspect of my kids' shot, but not only that, I step away from them, and I look at shooters all the time. And I'm looking at all of these details because I'm I'm so enamored and in love with the whole process of it that I do it I'm doing something that I hated at a time. Right?
Troy Washington:And I do it easily every day without any remorse in effect. Even my kids, they don't like to be out there as much as I do. But all I'm doing is sitting and looking at their hands, looking at their body posture, looking at all of these different things because I love the process of it now. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and since since we go a long time, I remember something I did wanna talk about with this subject real quick, because I know it could be helpful to people. The idea of pain, that comes from the past. Like, it it comes from something we're holding on to. Like, some kind of unease, not necessarily or it's disease, but not a dis not a disease.
JClay:And sometimes in this moment, if you're experiencing some kind of discomfort, ask yourself, what's the purpose of this? What purpose am I giving this pain? What what purpose do I have for this to continue bringing this with me now? And you'll be surprised at the answers that come up. I I've done this with myself, and it's just it it could be it it could be anything ranging from, I don't wanna do something, and I'm just not being real with myself to I think that this might give me some sympathy points from something something or something that somebody made me do that I didn't wanna do.
JClay:So I don't know. It it it's just so many interesting things that come up, and you realize how even silly pain is, and even even carrying that on as a possibility in your life. So to that as well, I would say ask yourself about it from this standpoint, but don't necessarily look for the cause of it in the past.
Troy Washington:I'm a say one last thing, and I'm a be done. And and, again, just show you how how the past let it go. Right? The future, fall in love with the process. That you know, like, I got a TV right now.
Troy Washington:I just took off TJ's wild. The t g TV is a a TV that we bought when we first moved into this house. And the TV, I can take it to I can take it to, Best Buy and get it fixed, and it might be, like, a $175 to get the backlight fixed, the $200 or whatever. Right? But, you know, you can go buy new TVs right now, same size for, like, a $175 or $200.
Troy Washington:Right? Why? You feel what I'm saying? Like, this this show alone, it just makes me ask the question, why? And, I'm just I I said that to tell everybody else, look, man.
Troy Washington:When you when you remove the past, you make room for the new. You know, it's it's it's always gonna be there. I even had a homeboy shout shout him out real quick. I ain't gonna say his name, but he was even on, Facebook, like, man, hey. You, my friend, come through.
Troy Washington:I got some TVs for $375. 75 inch TVs. So, you know, it's just it's just little stuff like that. And when I see it and I realize what I'm doing, it's a it's a check. So, you know, I I I caution everybody well, I I don't caution everybody.
Troy Washington:I encourage everybody to realize that now is more important than anything that you could ever have. And, you know, that's the reason why that this this whole title, the present has no equal, I love it. Nothing can be better than now. Nothing can be more, fulfilling than now. And if you allow yourself to appreciate now, love the process, then you will literally be in heaven.
Troy Washington:And, I just wanna say that I appreciate everybody for joining us today. We appreciate any, added commentary because y'all help us to realize that we're perfect. You know, we fix things while we've been on this show. I know that there's some homework that me and him both about to do right when we get out. So without y'all, we you know, we wouldn't be able to, you know, grow the way that we are, and we hope that we're doing the same for y'all.
Troy Washington:And, Jay, you can go ahead and take us out, baby.
JClay:Yeah. Appreciate y'all again for for rocking with us. Remember, we're here every Sunday from 12 noon to 1 PM CST. And, yeah, just if you found this helpful, hit the share button so others can can delight in that as well and feel fulfilled as as well and encouraged. And remember, you're a perfect creation made by a perfect creator, so you might as well accept your perfection and enter perfect mode.
JClay:If I reminded you that you are perfect, would you argue me down or step into your perfection perfection? Welcome to perfect welcome to perfect where there are no excuses, no expectations, and we explore the world without limitations. I'm Jay Clay, rapper, spiritual teacher, with my cohost Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor. Let's be real. So let's be perfect.
JClay:Let's be perfect. Perfect.
Troy Washington:Everything, anything, anything, anything,
JClay:Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect.