Journey to the Sunnyside

Over the last few years I've had the chance to sit down with researchers who study drinking behavior from a lot of different angles — psychology, neuroscience, habit formation, public health. And the thing that keeps striking me is how often what the research actually shows doesn't match the way most of us think drinking works. Not slightly off. Sometimes completely backwards. In this episode I walk through seven of those findings. The ones that surprised me most — and honestly, a few that changed how I think about the habit entirely.

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Creators and Guests

Host
Mike Hardenbrook
#1 best-selling author of "No Willpower Required," neuroscience enthusiast, and habit change expert.

What is Journey to the Sunnyside?

Journey to the Sunnyside is a top 1% podcast, reaching over 500,000 listeners every week. It’s your guide to exploring mindful living with alcohol—whether you're cutting back, moderating, or thinking about quitting.

While Sunnyside helps you reduce your drinking, this podcast goes further, diving into topics like mindful drinking, sober curiosity, moderation, and full sobriety. Through real stories, expert insights, and science-backed strategies, we help you find what actually works for your journey.

Hosted by Mike Hardenbrook, a #1 best-selling author and neuroscience enthusiast, the show is dedicated to helping people transform their relationship with alcohol—without shame, judgment, or rigid rules.

This podcast is brought to you by Sunnyside, the leading platform for mindful drinking. Want to take the next step in your journey? Head over to sunnyside.co for a free 15-day trial.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in our episodes do not necessarily represent those of Sunnyside. We’re committed to sharing diverse perspectives on health and wellness. If you’re concerned about your drinking, please consult a medical professional. Sunnyside, this podcast, and its guests are not necessarily medical providers and the content is not medical advice. We do not endorse drinking in any amount.

Speaker 1:

Hey everybody. Welcome back to another ten Minute Monday. Today I want to talk about something a little different. So over the past few years through the podcast, I've had a chance to speak with researchers who study drinking behaviors from a lot of different angles: psychology, neuroscience, public health, and of course, habit formation. And one thing that I keep coming back to is how often the research tells a very different story than the one most of us believe around drinking.

Speaker 1:

Not slightly off, sometimes completely backwards. So today, want to walk through seven of those findings, the ones that genuinely, they surprised me and honestly, a few that changed how I think about drinking entirely. So number one, we overestimate how much other people drink. One of the most consistent findings in alcohol research is something called normative misperception. Basically, most people believe the people around them drink more than they actually do.

Speaker 1:

If you ask somebody how much their peers drink in a typical week, the estimate is usually much higher than the real average. And researchers have documented this across college students, working professionals, and just the general adult population. And the results are subtle but powerful. If we believe everyone around us is drinking heavily, it quietly shifts what we see as normal. And when something feels normal, it becomes easier to justify doing it ourselves.

Speaker 1:

And I talked about this with Doctor. Jason Kilmer. He's from the University of Washington. And when he came on the podcast, he talked about his research that focused heavily on how perceived norms shape drinking behaviors. And one of the fascinating findings is that when people are shown the actual drinking averages of their peers and it's less, their own drinking often drops.

Speaker 1:

Not because anybody told them to change, just because their internal baseline has now shifted. Number two is the brain responds to alcohol cues before alcohol arrives. Another surprising finding is how early the brain begins reacting to alcohol related cues. So in brain image studies, researchers see activation in the reward centers of the brain before alcohol is even consumed, sometimes before a drink is even porn. This is the brain anticipating the reward.

Speaker 1:

And in neuroscience, that is closely tied to dopamine prediction, where the cue starts to matter almost as much as the reward itself, which means the environment around drinking becomes neurologically meaningful. The sound of ice in a glass, maybe the smell of wine, or walking to a familiar bar, even just finishing work at the end of the day. And over time, those cues become linked to the expected effect of alcohol. The brain starts preparing the reward before the alcohol arrives, which is one reason cravings can feel so strong even when someone hasn't even had a drink yet. The brain is responding to prediction of reward and not just the alcohol itself.

Speaker 1:

Number three is expectation shapes the drinking experience. Psychologists have studied something called alcohol expectancy effects. Basically, different people expect different outcomes from their drinking. Some expect confidence, some expect relaxation, some expect being more social. And those expectations actually predict how people experience alcohol.

Speaker 1:

Researchers test this using something called a balanced placebo design. And in some experiments, participants believe that they are drinking alcohol when they're actually not. In others, they're told that they're not drinking alcohol when they actually are. What researchers often find is that the behavior changes based on what people believe they have consumed. Someone who believes they drink alcohol may become more talkative or feeling relaxed, even when the drink contains little to no alcohol.

Speaker 1:

Meanwhile, someone who actually consumed alcohol but believes they did not may behave a little bit like they're tipsy. And in these cases, the brain is responding not just to the alcohol, it's responding to the belief and expectation. Number four is drinking habits often start earlier than we think. Most people think that habits begin when they reach for a drink. But behavioral research suggests the sequence actually begins earlier.

Speaker 1:

The cue might be finishing work, maybe changing clothes, starting dinner, or just sitting on the couch. Once I started noticing this in my own routines, it became pretty obvious. And there were nights when I looked back where I felt like maybe the cue, the decision to drink, happened while I was cooking dinner, wanted to hang out with my wife. But when I looked more closely, the real cue was actually earlier. It was when I was closing my laptop for the day and the only way that I could put a pin in that day was by having a drink.

Speaker 1:

So that moment quietly kicked in that whole sequence. The drink itself was not the start of the habit. It was actually the final step in the pattern that had already begun. Number five is most people have a default drinking script. Another pattern that researchers see is that people have a default number of drinks.

Speaker 1:

It's not necessarily consciously, but it's behavioral. So people tend to drink roughly the same amount during a typical drinking occasion, maybe two glasses of wine or three beers or six beers or one cocktail as a nightcap. And researchers started analyzing drink logs and diary studies that this pattern showed up again and again. Not perfectly, not drink to drink, but consistently enough that it stood out. And I can also say, looking back, the same occurred for me.

Speaker 1:

What's interesting here though, is that the number often stays the same even when the situation changes. Different restaurant, different people, different level of stress tends to be around the same number, which suggests something important: that for many people, it's on autopilot. Drinking is not being decided in a fresh way every single night. The brain has basically quietly formed a default script. And once that script forms, the brain loves to run it automatically.

Speaker 1:

Number six is people quietly match the drinking pace around them. Another finding that is easy to miss is how much people mirror the drinking behaviors of the others around them in real time. Say in social settings, people tend to synchronize their drinking with groups. They match the speed, they match the quantity, and they do it often without even realizing it. So if a group drinks quickly, individuals, they each tend to drink more quickly also.

Speaker 1:

If a group drinks more slowly, the same happens. This is not traditional peer pressure. It is basic human tendencies for us to mirror the behaviors of the people around us, which means the pace of the room matters more than most of us realize. And then number seven, the first drink is made by a different brain than the next ones. You've probably heard people say that the first drink is the most important decision of the night.

Speaker 1:

And that turns out to be more literal than it sounds. Deciding to have that first drink, that's made with your prefrontal cortex fully online. This is the part of the brain involved with planning, weighing consequences, and holding long term intentions in mind. So by the time somebody is deciding whether to have a second drink, third, fourth, and so on, they're doing it with a brain already less capable of the exact processes needed for self regulation. And as we know, each additional drink compounds that effect.

Speaker 1:

You're not making the same quality of decisions each time. Which is why, for a lot of people, the real leverage point is the moment before the first one. And as we know here at Sunnyside, planning is essential. Okay. We got through all seven.

Speaker 1:

And I'll say what stands out to me in all of this is how little discipline has to do with drinking behavior. It's a lot about pattern. It's a lot about expectation, a lot about what your brain has learned to predict, to repeat, and to normalize. And for me, that has always been one of the most useful shifts that I've learned. Because the more a habit makes sense, the less power it tends to have.

Speaker 1:

Now this isn't going to disappear overnight, but now you can actually see what's driving it. And if you can see what's driving it, you are now in a much better position to change it. If you want to go deeper on the idea of normative misperception, the conversation that I had with Doctor. Jason Kilmer goes much deeper into how perception shapes drinking behaviors. It's a really fascinating episode.

Speaker 1:

I urge you to go listen. Thanks for hanging out with me today. If you got anything out of this, please rate and review. Of course, email me anytime, mike@sunnyside.co. And until next time, cheers to your mindful drinking journey.