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Are you ready to take the steps necessary to thrive? Join us every episode as host Adam Gragg discusses what is holding us back and how to move forward with purpose, along the way developing healthy relationships and navigating life transitions while overcoming fear, stress and anxiety. Adam is a family therapist, mental health professional and life coach helping individuals and organizations find the transformational clarity that unleashes hope. Live the life you want, the legacy you decide.
Ep120_Ask
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Adam Gragg: [00:00:00] When you know what you want and you have some clarity about what you want to move towards, addiction gets in the way. And what I mean by addiction is anything that You get consumed with that's pulling you away from those best actions that you can take to move your life forward, your health forward, [00:01:00] relationships forward, your business forward.
And I also find that addiction is coming out of fear because that next better greater thing is we know in our gut intuitively that it's a much better situation for us, but we're terrified of it. So today's podcast, we're going to talk about asking for what you want. I have a special guest today. It's actually my dad, and we're going introduce him in just a second.
So there is this tremendous fear of rejection. So we don't ask for what we want because we could get embarrassed. They could say, no, ~we could get,~ we could just feel horrible about ourselves. And then we can get stuck in our head and doubt ourselves and this whole cycle starts to move forward.
That's what we're talking about today. We're going to figure out ways. I have three major tools, steps you can take to start asking for what you want. I'm going to mix in a bunch of questions that I asked my dad are related to asking for what you want. And I'm going to tell you why he's [00:02:00] going to be a great person to give us some feedback based on his career and how he's lived his life.
So this is episode number 120. Can you believe it? Of the Decide Your Legacy podcast. This episode is on fear, basically. Asking for what you want. Dealing with rejection. I Wanted to share one thing. as I do every episode that is scary that I've done in my life recently, I share this because there's nothing more important for your mental health than facing your fears and nothing more damaging to your mental health than playing it safe.
So recently I was in a part of town, Wichita, where I live and run the business, and I was by a business I had done some work for before in the past. I stopped in. By their office out of the blue, it's a company with a couple hundred employees. And I talked to one of the leaders there just out of the blue.
And I asked if we could get a time to visit because I had some new ways I might be able to help their company. And she said, yes. And I met with her and the other leader of the company, and then they ended up, [00:03:00] hiring me to do some work for them, but I would never have had that opportunity had I not stopped out of the blue, which is not something I normally do, and ask for some time, which led to a meeting, which led to a sale, and it's actually led to a really great relationship.
Just a new type of relationship with this company that I've had ~in the actual, ~in the past. Super exciting and energizing to me as well. So that's something that I did recently. I'm your host, Adam Gragg. I am a coach, a content creator, a speaker, ~I help people, ~I love helping people find transformational clarity so they're prepared, ~propelled ~to face their fears, which helps them grow their confidence and ~helps them ~live their legacy.
By living the legacy, I mean living the life now that they want to be remembered for when they're gone. So they're actually making the most of everything they have now and in the time they have now, cause it's fragile and to live life takes courage. And so I'm a fellow traveler. I do not have it all figured out.
I create this podcast, not just for you, but for me as well. ~So as I shared, I did something uncomfortable recently by stopping by this company. ~This [00:04:00] is a podcast where you get to do uncomfortable things as well. So that means you take some kind of an action right now just to get started on this content.
So I want you to think and to write this in on a piece of paper, write it in your journal, speak it into your phone. What is something that you're afraid to ask for in your life. So is it, you're afraid to ask your wife to change some aspect of your relationship? You're afraid to ask your husband for more time?
You're afraid to ask your dad to spend time with you? You're afraid to ask for that sale? Or afraid to ask for a promotion? Or you're afraid to ask for a raise? Or you're afraid to ask somebody on a date? Or to even ask somebody for lunch, to coffee, that you find is interesting. Asking people to go play golf with you.
What are you afraid of? I want you to think about that as we go through this content. ~So let's, let's jump right in. ~The reason I wanted to talk about this topic is because recently I've been doing a lot of work growing Decide Your Legacy. And one aspect that I've been working on is figuring out a better sales [00:05:00] strategy, a better marketing strategy.
And sales and marketing are different. Marketing is how people are viewing your organization. It's ongoing. Sales is asking somebody to buy. All right. ~That's the way I look at it, at least in my own head. ~I'm working on my fear of closing a deal, of reaching out, of telling people about the business. I see a ton of potential right now with Decide Your Legacy.
And I think the main thing that holds me back is me, because I'm the leader. ~And holds me, I mean, ~I hold the company back because I have my own fears I'm working on. That's why I wanted to do this interview today. And I was inspired to a week and a half ago was Father's Day. I've thought about having him on this podcast for a long period of time, but the way I want to think about sales too is make a potential rejection.
And this is a mindset shift for me, a potential success. So if it could be an area where you're rejected, it can also be a place where you could actually succeed. So let's go ahead and jump right in. So dad, I'm going to ask you some questions about sales and asking for a just, you know, tell us about yourself.
~A few things so we can get to know you a little bit and how you got involved in sales in the first place. So where were you born? What's your age? Tell us about that.~
Eric Gragg: Well, [00:06:00] it's Eric Gragg and I was born in Visalia, California in 1939. So, I'm one of three children. I was the oldest, and
Adam Gragg: So, you were born in 1939. I'm just curious, do you have any memories of World War II?
Eric Gragg: None, except maybe of some newspapers. I saw newspapers on it.~ ~
Adam Gragg: ~In 1945? 45. 46. Yeah. Okay, that's about all the memories you have.~ Okay, so how did you originally, like tell us what was your very first job growing up?
Eric Gragg: Well, the first job with an independent company and not something where I went on my own, but actually my very first work was out calling on the neighbors.
So I like to do that. And I had fun with it, but the first job, I guess, was, newspapers, and, I had three paper routes. And, you know, so I would get up at 4, 35 in the morning. And, so
Adam Gragg: what do you mean about by calling on [00:07:00] the neighbors? ~Well, ~
Eric Gragg: ~I, you just looking for work or doing something like that, even as a seven, eight, nine, 10 year old kid, ~I had a lawn business that I could mow lawns, you know, so I did a number of different things, but the first actual job where I was, I was actually working in a drugstore.
As a, for a pharmacist and, that lasted a couple of years. And then I was like 15, 16 years old. And then I went to work in a grocery store, across the street. ~You know, ~so I was, and that I was doing, I was working seven days a week. I worked five days in the grocery store. I'd work Saturday in the bakery, cleaning the bakery.
And I'd work Sunday in the meat market. ~We're ~cleaning all ~the meat. The meat grinders? ~The meat grinders, cleaning the floor.
Adam Gragg: What was your motivation to start making money at 7 or 8 years old though? Like, a lot of kids are not really interested in that. ~Unless they have something they want to buy, I guess, maybe, but.~
Eric Gragg: We collected bottles, and of course, maybe it was because we're right at the end of the depression or something. But, you know, or during the war, things were [00:08:00] short, so. I can remember a red wagon and we'd go to the neighbors and collect bottles and take them back for the deposits. So, the motivation was just to make some money, and have some independence, and do what I wanted to do,
Adam Gragg: What did you spend money on at 7 or 8 years old?
Eric Gragg: You know, just my own entertainment. Oh, really? ~Yeah. ~Like what was entertainment? Well, like, ~you know, ~a soda, a bag of peanuts, a soda, a candy bar. Okay. ~You know, so. Yeah. ~So everybody, and even though we were given, there was allowances were like 15, 25 cents, ~you know.~
When you were seven or eight years old. And a movie was 10 cents.
Adam Gragg: Okay,
So what were some of the challenges that you had in your family as a child?
Adversity that you experienced? I know you had the surgery at a young age.
Eric Gragg: Yeah, that was two months old, but that didn't really affect anything. And the recovery time was real quick, but, I had allergies, so I had to [00:09:00] get allergy shots once a week. And then I couldn't eat certain foods, so, ~I had to, ~I couldn't eat regular wheat bread, and so I had to eat cornbread, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with cornbread.
Which a good day happened when somebody stole my lunch. ~Yeah, really. ~Cause you, you can't put peanut butter and jelly on cornbread very easily, and you can't put ham and cheese on cornbread.
Adam Gragg: So that was an allergy to foods that you had.
Eric Gragg: Yeah. Food allergy. So, and I still have it to this day. I still am allergic to watermelons and cucumbers and.
What was the
Adam Gragg: surgery you had at age two months old?
Eric Gragg: It was called pleuric stenosis and it was a digesting food. It was in the chest. I still have a big scar right there. It was two months old. Yeah. And it, it was common. It was a common thing where you, you couldn't, couldn't swallow your food. In
Adam Gragg: [00:10:00] 1939.
1939. You had the surgery, so that was not. A great time of, to have surgery at a two, as a two month old, I bet.
Eric Gragg: Probably not, you know, it's pretty risky
Adam Gragg: to have. Yeah.
Eric Gragg: Yeah. The but you know, everything came out fine. I never had any trouble with it and the surgery was pretty standard so they could get it done and they knew what they knew what to do.
And so, but they put a good size in a two month old, they put a. Two inch, two inch cut.
Adam Gragg: Yeah,
Eric Gragg: so that's
Adam Gragg: how old were when your brother was diagnosed with polio.
Eric Gragg: I was 14 I think yeah 14 or yeah 14 or 15. Yeah, that's only 70 years ago Yeah, so really so they did come in and burn everything in the house When afterwards, which they burned all our clothes, all the mattresses, everything.
They weren't sure how people got polio. So,
Adam Gragg: so who burnt [00:11:00] everything in your house?
Eric Gragg: The health department with the county.
Adam Gragg: It was mandatory?
Eric Gragg: Yeah. That you burnt everything, everything with
Adam Gragg: polio. Well, they
Eric Gragg: picked everything up and took it away.
Adam Gragg: Did you guys have other people that you knew that had polio?
Eric Gragg: Yeah, a few, but you know, Jean's mother.
Yeah. You know, so my
Adam Gragg: uncle's mother.
Eric Gragg: She had polio and and she just died four weeks ago. She was 96,
Adam Gragg: I
Eric Gragg: think.
Adam Gragg: Yeah, that's pretty amazing. Back then, so that
Eric Gragg: all those things have changed a lot.
Adam Gragg: So let's talk about your career history a little bit here, because that's what we're going to be talking about today.
So what was ~your~ worst job of all time?
Eric Gragg: I guess the worst job I had was working in a cap shop. I was like 16 or 17, and every Saturday I had to dump the truck, take the dump truck, which wouldn't dump, but full of ground up tires that were ground down to fine sawdust, like, like sawdust or [00:12:00] sand, and shovel that truck out, which usually took, it took a, you know, 30 minute drive from work and then back into the dump and dump that with a shovel, dump that truck and clean it out and then go back and get another load.
Or sometimes it'd take, there'd be two loads, but not very often, ~but ~it would take all week to fill it up. It'd be a week worth of grinding in the cap shop. They grind the old tread off the tires. ~And, ~that's where this comes, this ground up rubber. So it got everywhere. It was in your nose, it was in your ears.
You had to wear a mask. Yeah. So it was, it was,
Adam Gragg: Probably would have to wear a respirator today for that kind of thing.
Eric Gragg: But that was, I'm thinking that was the worst job I had.
Adam Gragg: What was your first sales job?
Eric Gragg: First sales job or first attempting to do the first attempt to do sales. My dad brought home a [00:13:00] hundred stationary packages and he said, Hey, if you can sell these, he said, you know, you give me 10 cents and I, you can have 15 cents and sell them for a quarter each and that, and so I went to the neighbors, they had 10 sheets of paper and 10 envelopes.
And it was used in promotion with Firestone Tire and Rubber Company. So there was nothing on them, but they were, they were good quality paper. And so I ended up selling the whole hundred. He got me another case of them. I sold those and then he couldn't get any more. I thought, so he made some money. I made some money.
You know, I was asking
Adam Gragg: you actually, and so you, what did you do with that money that you've made from selling those stations? Are you, how old were you then? It was like,
Eric Gragg: 10. So
Adam Gragg: what'd you do with the money you made?
Eric Gragg: I probably paid for half a shotgun. My dad had a deal that we, I, we had a 410 single [00:14:00] shot that we used to hunt with and he had a pump action and so I wanted one of those.
And so. We went and took, if I put up half the money, I think it was like 90 bucks for a shotgun in those days.
Adam Gragg: Yup. So you took that money. Okay. And that's the shotgun you gave me.
Eric Gragg: Yeah. And then I paid for it. I have that
Adam Gragg: shotgun. Seriously.
Eric Gragg: Yeah. It still does. And then I, I also, you know, bought, you know, bought books cause I like to read.
So I do that and magazines and I don't, paid for my own bicycle. So back then, you know, so, so it did this that just got me certain things that I wanted. What
Adam Gragg: did you read back then?
Eric Gragg: Actually, The Hardy Boys was a good story book that we read and then my grandmother gave me a book on the history of the world.
And which was fascinating. So you'd think I would have traveled [00:15:00] more, but I've got a wife who doesn't like to fly. So I don't travel as much, but we've been quite a few places. So,
Adam Gragg: so what was your favorite book as a kid?
Eric Gragg: I think The Count of Monte Cristo was pretty good. Yeah, that was pretty good. By Alexander Dumas?
Yep. Really? I didn't know that. You know, and then That But I mean, I read, I loved the mystery books, so I used to come home from school, and there was no TV, and so I'd read a book, I'd get in a big chair and read a Hardy Boys book. Did you read all the Dune books? Oh yeah. You loved
Adam Gragg: those Dune books. Yeah. I remember that.
Dune was good, and that's been You liked Dune?
Eric Gragg: 35, 40 years. Have you seen the new movie? I've seen one of them. No, I haven't. The second one's pretty good. Yeah, the first one was a lot to be desired.
Adam Gragg: I liked it. But anyway, okay, so that's your work history. And then, okay, first sales job, like career oriented and what did you sell and how did you sell stuff and what's going on there?
Eric Gragg: Well, when I graduated from college, I went to [00:16:00] work for CertainTeed and our job was selling truckloads of roofing and insulation. And so I had to call on architects, installation contractors, roofing contractors, and all really nice open guys to call on, you know, give you good confidence because they respected that we were with the manufacturer.
And they might, they wouldn't buy the order direct from me. I couldn't sell them the order. They'd have to buy it through one of our distributors. So, but you know, that was the very first job where I got, actually got paid and got a commission. Well, maybe not the first one, but it was close. That was the first one for a, an international company.
Adam Gragg: Okay. How old were you when you got that job?
Eric Gragg: I was 30. Okay.
Adam Gragg: 30. Okay. So selling building products. And so let's go ahead and move on. So I want to, the first thing, the first tool, [00:17:00] I would say a key to keep in mind that I think of when I'm asking for what I want is to have some courage. Like that's the, it's one of the, the three that I'm going to talk to you.
So courage, taking action, and that I find that after I do something, at first, I'm not confident in myself the first time I do it or the second time or the third time. So I know I'm doing something courageous when I'm really insecure about it. So I don't want to do it. And then I do it. And then afterwards I feel much better because I've tried or not always much better, but eventually over time.
So if I have some sort of thing where I'm going to contact 10 businesses, I can be afraid and not want to do it. And then I start, to procrastinate, get into addictive type behaviors, which for me can be worry or it can be getting stuck on some other issue. It can be just looking and reading things, researching, over researching.
So that to me, everybody
Eric Gragg: has [00:18:00] that.
Adam Gragg: Probably so. Oh yeah. I mean, that's what I want to talk to you about. So courage, meaning like, how did you build confidence to Go out and make sales calls.
Eric Gragg: Well, I was fortunate. I liked meeting new people. So, and also too, I mean, the very first time I might've been afraid of, but it'd been so long ago that I forgotten, but I love to meet new people and I love the challenge of just knocking on a door and saying hello, and if they answered the door, you know, and And actually, I tried that with knives when I was right out of high school and didn't do very well, but I kept knocking on the doors and so I, I, I like doing that.
In fact, some of the best deals that I've done were because I knocked on a door and met somebody new. and or I was cold calling and it was, I enjoyed it. So what is
Adam Gragg: one, tell us about one of [00:19:00] the big deals that you made from not, you met somebody out of the blue and it ended up being a good experience professionally.
Eric Gragg: Yes, well the I mean it also, it built more confidence too because I had a piece of property I sold to a builder and he needed tenants so it was in an industrial area so I went to a I had printed up a flyer and I got with another of my partner and we agreed to call all the businesses in this area, which were about, oh, maybe there was about 50.
Something like that. And I said, we'd meet back here at lunch. And so I went to, I went and made the calls and then I got back to the restaurant and the guy wasn't there. And it turns out he was back at the office. He hadn't called one, made one call. And in that, the calls that I made, I picked up enough business to take care [00:20:00] of real estate.
I tried to cover all the things I needed to cover, and this week I did. This is the first time you're going to find a hundred Words, or words that you can use for study. I did it with Ted Christensen. Because I do spend a lot of time talking about my past experiences. And so I had a conference that was based on what I had heard of in the past.
So, so, so it it was a very profitable morning. I, and I ended up filling the building up. I ended up separating a business partnership because again, he wouldn't call on anybody. He ended up getting out of the business. But so I think it's your personality and you got to like it. You know, I could tell you a dozen stories of where it happened just like that.
And it just stopped stopping by ask to see the owner.
Adam Gragg: So did you deal with that experience or in other times, how [00:21:00] did you handle the rejection? Because surely not everybody was friendly. Yeah, everybody
Eric Gragg: was, everybody was friendly. Everybody was friendly. Everybody was friendly. This is, okay. I
Adam Gragg: don't believe in that.
So all 50 of those businesses were friendly and glad to see a stranger.
Eric Gragg: Yeah, well, they were, some of them were too busy to talk. And obviously, so I just say, Hey, I've got a problem. You got, you've got a real estate problem and we'd like to chat with you. Yeah. You know, and so, but, and the secretaries usually They would, you know, because I was a coat and a tie and I wasn't, you know, like I was pedaling or something.
I've told them all, I have a problem with a building down the street and I need to talk to the owner of this building.
Adam Gragg: Okay.
Eric Gragg: And usually that got me in, and if not, I'd think of something else. You would think of something else? Okay.
Adam Gragg: Would you make stuff up?
Eric Gragg: No, no. I didn't make stuff up. You didn't make stuff up.
I did have another experience where I went in, and I woke up this [00:22:00] boxer on the floor, and he bit half my file. He came after me just like a flash and I had to, they backed me up, clear out the door and across the street and I'm holding this vanilla envelope or vanilla folder in front where I've got these pamphlets in.
Huh. And that was a business? That was a business. You know, the dog, I woke the dog up and he said he doesn't usually do that, but I startled him.
Adam Gragg: So tell us about how you got into commercial real estate then. And then what, how old were you when you first got into it? And I was 41. You're 41 when you started doing it full time.
Yeah, that's where I left.
Eric Gragg: I left the job that I got when I was 30. I spent 10 years there. And yeah, I ended up quitting three times and then they hired me back at more money each time. Why did you quit? Cause they weren't, they would cut the commissions as January 1st, they'd cut the commissions or set you a new level to, to [00:23:00] get paid at, and usually your first two months were so short.
You couldn't even make a rent payment or a house payment.
Adam Gragg: How did you do?
Eric Gragg: I did all right, but I, I had to quit. I actually had to quit. In fact, in one case, I gave notice. He said, well, I'm going to come up Friday and see you. And I said, whatever you want. I said, I'll, I'll, I'm given two weeks notice right now.
He couldn't come up Friday. He called me. I said, not a problem. We'll meet Monday. I met, I put my house up for sale Friday. I sold the house because I had another job and was gonna move to Modesto. And he came down and offered me more money. And I said, Reggie, I've already taken another job.
And he said, well, I said, in fact, I've sold my house. It's sold. I got a deposit on it. And so I sold the house for, at that day, it aged for [00:24:00] 42, 000. That was 12, 000 more than I paid for it. So, which was a lot of money. you had to, you just had to take care of yourself and your family.
Adam Gragg: What would you tell somebody who is new in sales on how to best deal with rejection?
Eric Gragg: Well, I said you gotta, first of all, you gotta face it. ~You know, ~and you got to deal with it the best you can.
And it's not fun, but everybody feels the same way. I mean, I felt everybody could cold call. So I'm always surprised when somebody says they don't like to do that. I said, man, that's more fun than, you know, you meet so many nice, interesting people, but I cold called the CEO for one of the biggest banks in the world and ended up selling his building for 90 million dollars.
And and he was very hesitant. He, in fact, I called him and then finally he called me back. And of course this is 25 years ago, but the [00:25:00] building was a pyramid building here in Sacramento and they, they sold the building and signed a 21 year triple net lease on the building. And he called to tell me, he called me back to tell me that they didn't think they want to sell it.
And I said, well, we have a problem then because my client has spent 700, 000 on due diligence. And because of the soil was sandy where we built the building. It was right on the Sacramento river. And they had to go down 150 feet and they put 11 shock absorbers that it would absorb a 7 or 8. 0 hit on the Richter scale on this building.
And so, and he was the biggest bank and because he thought he might have to reimburse 700, 000 of my client, he closed a 90 million dollar deal.
Adam Gragg: Wow. You think he did it because of that?
Eric Gragg: Oh ~yeah,~ I know it. And I was crazy. I [00:26:00] said, man, that's crazy. Well, the deal never should have closed.
Adam Gragg: That's amazing. And you've met him through a cold call.
You didn't have any kind of connection?
Eric Gragg: No. Well, I, you know, he, I, I called him and told him who I was, you know, and You know, and somebody gave me his number, I'm sure, because he was in Atlanta. I can't even, I can't even remember the name of the bank right now, but
Adam Gragg: it was huge. So, and just so you know, for listeners out here, a cold call means that you're reaching out to somebody that you don't have any kind of connection with at all.
So, it's like, but I don't know how many cold calls actually really happen. Like that situation where you went to businesses that you didn't actually know at all around that building. Well, yeah, that would be, but there still was like a warm. Reason to reach out because you had a building right next to them near their businesses, right?
So there was something that connected you like I think of a cold calls like I have no idea anything about I I'm in A neighborhood. I don't have any kind of relationship to these people at all. I've no building nothing whatever Well, I get some kind of connection though these
Eric Gragg: people well, I the I [00:27:00] went after that day like two weeks later I got another building that actually I owned and I went out of the area into a strictly warehouse area in West Sacramento.
So I had no connection to any of the property owners at all. It just said, Hey, I have a building, you know, it's 20, 000 feet and we need to get a tenant, you know, you got the interest in more space and basically that's it, but that you're right. The first one was you know, but it was, I never met the guy.
So that to me is a cold call.
Adam Gragg: And how did you get the listing with, when you sold a piece of property once, like, you had a big piece of farmland at times? How did you get listings like that? With farmland, with people that were
Eric Gragg: Talk to the farmers and it's like Valley View, that 138 acres, that was just grassland.
But you know, I, I co called the brothers that owned the land. [00:28:00] And it turned out they had just borrowed 300, 000 and we're paying 25 percent interest. Oh, wow. And I said, you guys need to get out of this. And it was a money broker. I'm not sure it wasn't part of the mob, but but I got him the money.
I got him 600 grand so they could pay that 300, 000 off and they kept 38 percent of the property and they ended up making like 5 million. On what I think, yep, so.
Adam Gragg: So it made them some money. Yeah. Definitely made them some money. Well, they
Eric Gragg: got in a lot of trouble. They were two college graduates who were in the cattle business, and they ran cattle on this property and other properties around.
And their grandfather, Gary Ure, was a pioneer, like our family. And they came he came to California and picked up land at Lake Tahoe and land in Folsom. So, [00:29:00] but they turned out to be good guys and we're still friends.
Adam Gragg: Okay. That's amazing. So how did you, so I want to basically take a break here for a second.
So if you found this podcast helpful, hit the link to Shatterproof Yourself Lite. These are seven small steps to a giant leap in your mental health. And so we talk about seven steps that you can take right now. It's a brief 25 minute video. You can watch it. You sign up and these steps are tools you can apply right now.
I mean, from 25 years as a mental health professional, these things can change your life. Any one of them can change your life. I mean, I know that sounds cliche, but this comes from my experience with people making it simple, making it stick, taking action. So it's on clarifying your vision, facing your past adversity.
That's step two, knowing your values. Step three, step four is shifting your perspective, owning your emotions. Step [00:30:00] five, step six is self care and step. Seven is building solid relationships. You only get access to it through hitting that link, getting on the list. You want to check that out. Don't miss it.
So the second thing we talked about the first key to asking for what you want to getting through that fear that you have of making that step, taking that step to ask for what you want, closing the sale, asking to close the sale. Second one is about attitude and mindset. That's a huge key attitude and mindset.
How do you grow and grow? in your attitude and have the mindset where you can deal with things. In your life and you can deal with adversity, you can get and face rejection. So this is where I like to start with people who have a fear of rejection or fear of something in their life happening, getting hurt again.
I want them to see that they can do some work on their mindset to change it and shift it. And So sometimes people have this mindset of, you know, if I get rejected, it's personal. If I get embarrassed, my life's going to fall apart. If things don't go well, or I don't close the [00:31:00] deal, or if things fall apart, my life's going to fall apart.
Not just one area of your life. Something I like to share with clients is the three P's. You know, we take it personally. We look at it as pervading our entire life. So if we're not doing well in our career, we look at our whole life is not going well. So we let it pervade all the different parts of our lives.
And then we view it as being permanent. And so mindset shifts that I have made at times, it helps me when I'm going to ask for a sale or reach people, reach out to people who could potentially reject me or not want to do business with me is to think about it as a way to help other people. I'm helping them solve a problem.
Maybe there's a need that they have that I can help them solve. And therefore, I'm a great blessing to them. They may not know it. And when I first reach out to them, they may not see that yet. But just as my dad had shared, they had 300, 000, 25 percent loan on a piece of property that was potentially done by the mob.
Now, he helped them get a loan, or at least get some money at a lower [00:32:00] interest rate, which helped them to start doing something more productive with the land, which led to them actually having, creating equity in the land and getting some money out of it and making that into a significant investment. And that's really cool when you can think that this person doesn't know it yet, but my interaction with them potentially could identify a need where I have skills and unique abilities where I can use those unique abilities to help them.
Because think about it, we're all in the business of helping people get to a better future if you want to. Like, it's not, it's not about scarcity. When I think about it, And when it's about status and achievement and performance, then I'm competing with somebody else. Right? Like that whole attitude is competition.
There's only so much business and I got to be able to get this business before they get the business or someone else gets the business. But when I think about it in a healthy mindset, it's like there's plenty of business to go around because there's all kinds of people around and I'm not the best person to help everybody.
But if I reach out to different people like my dad did in 50 [00:33:00] different companies, or whatever, around that one building that you had at some point, you made all these different connections. And then some of those people you were able to help over the next year, and it created business for the next year.
But it would never have actually happened if you weren't willing to knock on the doors and get, you know, help. Your portfolio bitten by a dog, but it was only happening because you took a risk to get out there and be courageous. So to work on that mindset, let's talk about that some here. How, well, first of all, like what were the most challenging times in your career in real estate, let's say?
Eric Gragg: Well, let's say I got into the real estate when the interest rates were 17, 18% in 1980. And so that was and, and Yeah, that was, that was the year 80, 81. That was pretty challenging because nobody could borrow any money and make a pencil. So, that was challenging. And then when they had the big depression in 2008.
I think it was, and then the real estate [00:34:00] market took big hits then too. So, so it's continually taken hits, but it's like periodic periods of maybe four to eight years in between. So, that was, that was real tough. In fact, I almost left the business because it got so tough and it was hard to make any money, so I had to figure, I had to, I flipped over instead of selling land and.
Industrial buildings. I went to investment properties and just sold investment properties where they were getting a decent return and they had good tenants.
Adam Gragg: I was thinking that was maybe, are you sure that was 2008? I think that was probably, wasn't that like the late nineties?
Eric Gragg: Yeah, it could be in you the late 90s.
Yeah 2008 but also no, yeah 1983 and then it went bad in the 90s with the real estate was just yeah ahead
Adam Gragg: for maybe a year So what was your mindset or attitude when you were reaching out to [00:35:00] people that you didn't know before you went in like what would? You're telling yourself. What were you? How are you pumping yourself up to deal with that?
Eric Gragg: Well, I first of all I had a story So I could, you know, talk to them and I think that was important. What do you mean by having a story? I had a good reason to stop by. I just had to convince them that that's what they had. And unbeknownst to me, everybody has a commercial real estate question.
Everybody has one or two that they want answered. So, that helped tremendously.
Adam Gragg: Right there, because they would have a question that they would want, and you were willing to answer it.
Eric Gragg: And, you know, the more time they took, the more confident I would become.
Adam Gragg: Because they were spending time with you. Exactly.
And So, did you approach, because it seems to me that you had the attitude when you approached people, even if your attitude was that this could be a really great interaction, not that, [00:36:00] the opposite of that would be like, this could go really bad. Some people approach interactions thinking this could go really bad.
Eric Gragg: Oh yeah, people have done that, but most of the time it went well, and it was like, it was a fun experience.
Adam Gragg: So is that the attitude going into it was like, this could go well?
Eric Gragg: Oh, yeah,
Adam Gragg: and it could be fun. I would meet new people.
Eric Gragg: And, and usually, I mean, I did that my whole career.
Adam Gragg: Cause yeah. And you know, he had a car phone in like 1986.
Wait, you had a car phone way before other people had car phones. Remember that thing you
Eric Gragg: had? But that was, was, I forget the
Adam Gragg: year. It was a long,
Eric Gragg: it was in the eighties, in the mid eighties. It was like a box.
Adam Gragg: It was like a box and it was very expensive. And I remember driving around with him and he would have this It was always a yellow notepad, not a white one, and you would just take notes of properties that you saw, and you would fill this up throughout the day.
And how many miles would [00:37:00] you put on a car every year? With that, you put lots of miles.
Eric Gragg: Yeah, and I have no idea, other than the fact that that Lexus had 130. I think. Well, no, you had
Adam Gragg: a Mercedes.
Eric Gragg: I mean, I also had a Lexus too, but the Mercedes had, when I bought the, it was brand new car. It was. And I sold, that had like 200, 000 miles.
Oh, you
Adam Gragg: had like 300 something thousand on the diesel?
Eric Gragg: No, I don't think so. You had a
Adam Gragg: lot of miles. Anyway, but you drove it a lot.
Eric Gragg: I did. So how
Adam Gragg: did you move past the challenging and through the challenging seasons in real estate when the interest rates or the market sucked? You know,
Eric Gragg: well, if I was first.
Just call, just handle and lease, and then I'd switch over, but I started leasing industrial properties that moved into industrials, land sales, and then that moved into industrial buildings, and then from there it went to investments, so I had to continually make adjustments, [00:38:00] but every time I cold called, when I finish, even if it's just two or three hours, It would be such a pleasant experience for me.
It would give me all kinds of confidence I could go. For another six hours. You're making, how did
Adam Gragg: you structure the calls on people? Cause what if you got in one conversation was like an hour long?
Eric Gragg: Well, usually I didn't, but it could, sometimes it could be, but usually what I do is just say, Hey, think about it.
I'll call you back. And you got some questions. I can't, I don't, I've got to get these out today. And usually most of us send fine, you know, call me back. And I say, what's a good time to call? I marked it down. I would pick up from just going to work in the morning and having a plan. And exercising the plan was a great confidence builder. How did you create the plan? Just, just dependent on what, when I had to [00:39:00] talk about and where I was, if it was raw land, you know, then I've, I've got people that are interested in looking at raw land and there you'd have to drive right to their house cause it'd be far apart.
So that was probably one of the easiest things, just call them and start talking to them. And and then, and then just say, Hey, I'd stop by and show you some of the stuff that we've got for sale and what we for sale. And everything that I did was kind of helped build the confidence so that you, you know, I mean, even to this day, you know, I would call people and, and talk to them about, you know, not necessarily real estate, but, but you'd be amazed at the people that have something that they want to.
Talk about or they want to sell.
Adam Gragg: Always had something.
Eric Gragg: Yeah. There's always something.
Adam Gragg: So what is it then for somebody who lacks confidence [00:40:00] with meeting new people? How would ~you help~ them? Let's say somebody is brand new into the real estate business and they're struggling with meeting new people. How would you help
Eric Gragg: them to build their confidence?
Well, first of all, there's books on building confidence out. There are there, you know, that you've got, there's books that just good to read. So I read everything that came by me. I, I read and I still do, I can have two books going at one time. And but in what I tell them to ~number~ one, know what you're, you've got for sale.
You've got a building, you should know it inside and out and, you know, and what you could do with it, and then you got to be creative with a financing. So. When the market got tough, then I'd be creative with the financing. So I made a connection with the money store who ended up buying this building for 90 million.
Basically I just, they got to know their product and they've [00:41:00] got to know actually if they can find out something about who they're calling on, you know, that always helps too. Cause that builds confidence if they, and, but I said, the big thing is just go in there cold and just be flexible and be ready to talk about commercial real estate.
And what the market's doing and even the economy.
Adam Gragg: So what were some books that helped you with your confidence then?
Eric Gragg: Certainty, the first job had a sales program where they, sales thing, where you could do the work and I worked on it for like, I would say three, four, five months and, and then when I finally turned it in, it was just a confidence builder.
It was a sales thing that you, you know, about sales, different techniques to sell property or to sell roofing and insulation, or to get to know the client. You know, it was just a [00:42:00] number of things along that line. And when I finished the thing, they'd never had anybody finish. Everybody got burned out on the thing.
And they said, and I think it helped me get the, the Territory Manager of the Year award. in like 1970. Yeah, 70. And you know, that just, you just keep coming up with ideas and just don't be afraid. And everybody has the fear. So you, but you gotta, you gotta, the first step is just knocking on the door.
And, and I said, when they, if they're uncomfortable, just go in there and have something to, to show if you can. And and then just see where the conversation goes. And usually the conversation went to a whole bunch of different. Subjects, but it would focus mostly on the building and on the, on the [00:43:00] commercial real estate.
Adam Gragg: That's what I find too is if I'm going to reach out to somebody, I can start thinking, I got to know everything to say. And if it's a new business in my case or a potential client, I got to know everything to say everything I'm prepared for every which way it could go. That doesn't really go that well.
If I let go and then I just let it happen the way it's supposed to happen. I mean, it's good to be prepared. Don't get me wrong, but after it happens and I push through the fear, I find that you just never know where it's going to go, but it's good a lot of times. Not always, but it's good a lot of times.
So,
Eric Gragg: well, it's so good that it makes your whole day when it's, when it happens. When something surprises you that ends up being a good thing. Yeah. You say, shoot, you know. I mean, and that's how that building, I mean, I mentioned the money store I hooked up with them to make loans and I made, I sold a piece of property and the, the, the property buyer got the first [00:44:00] million dollar small business loan ever done in California was done right here in Sacramento.
Adam Gragg: So what was another situation where you reached out to somebody and you know, you had the right attitude when you went into it and then surprisingly it turned out to be a positive. Real estate situation.
Eric Gragg: You know, well, there's a, I got a hospital building for sale. And it was, it was actually a warehouse with some offices for the hospital.
And the the tenant went bankrupt. And so the owners approached me and, and I got the listing. So when I, the first thing I did, it was between, I The river in Sacramento along our street, which is where the real real, Road tracks and run. And I started cold calling that with a little brochure on this thing.
And it happened again. I picked up enough business [00:45:00] and in one day to last more than a year
Adam Gragg: from that situation, just
Eric Gragg: from knocking on the door, saying hello, introduce myself and tell them I have a building down the street. We got a problem with, if they got a few minutes, maybe they might give us, have some suggestions on.
What to do,
Adam Gragg: okay, you know, and they were businesses that were nearby.
Eric Gragg: Yeah, they were down the street But they were actually, some of them were six miles away.
Adam Gragg: So I get the sense that you, you were able to cultivate an attitude that was like, this could go well and this could be fun
Eric Gragg: and I'm going to
Adam Gragg: enjoy this.
Eric Gragg: Yeah.
Adam Gragg: So do you do that kind of stuff now at all? Cause you still, that's the thing about it. He's, he's 85, but he still does some work right now. And so what kind of work do you do now? Basically?
Eric Gragg: Well, we, we've got a mini stories that we just built. So we're building that. And it's just completed, we just opened.
So [00:46:00] I'm also hassling with Walgreens, who's a tenant. So some of the stuff is not fun, you know, when you hassle with somebody who has 8, 500 stores. in the U. S. and another 5, 000 in Europe. And they are difficult. And so
Adam Gragg: you deal with tenants and negotiating situations. Yeah,
Eric Gragg: basically. So as little of that as possible, but we've Walgreens is on a 60 year lease.
So, have done some stuff that's ethically questionable, but they're owned now by Boots International, which is the largest drug company in Europe. So Walgreens is the lender and so they think they can do whatever they want. The one thing they do know, they, if they don't pay the rent, the lease is canceled.
And so they pay the rent on time.
Adam Gragg: How do you stay motivated and keep the right attitude with business now?
Eric Gragg: It's tough. You know, but something I own, [00:47:00] I'm really motivated. So I'm a partner and So we've got things, so you just, but you just have to bite the bullet and you know, and deal with the problem.
That's the one thing too, is not put it off. If you put off something, that's one thing else I learned. You put something off, it never gets settled. It just becomes a bigger problem.
Adam Gragg: Just do it.
Eric Gragg: So you just got to deal with it. And I learned that a long time ago. If I got a cold call somebody, cold call them.
Get it done.
Adam Gragg: Get it done.
Eric Gragg: If I got a problem, talk to them and get it done. So that's what you have to do. So
Adam Gragg: that's a good segue to the third key to asking for what you want to dealing with the rejection fear is to get organized. Now, this could be the very first thing that you do get organized and number two, deal with your attitude.
Be in a number three, be courageous, but I'm kind of going in this reverse order here. So get organized. So like, I am amazed that I can easily waste two hours a time of day, just being on [00:48:00] YouTube, just. researching things, just time wasting kind of activities. And then when I have a plan, a business plan, a sales plan, I'm getting the sales plan thing ready right now.
And that's been very helpful to me because I have target lists of companies that I've worked with before. I have prospects, I have people that I want to reach out to, and then I have some accountability with it where people are like, Holding me accountable like Lloyd, my operations director, holds me accountable.
And my clients hold me accountable. I mean, people hold me accountable. Friends hold me accountable. So. What I want to talk about here, Dad, is how do you, what are some of the secrets? First of all, because you're 85 and you're healthy. So how have you, this is about discipline being organized. How have you stayed healthy up until now?
Eric Gragg: Probably just because I work out, you know, daily, usually, and because your sister got me into yoga. So I, every week I try to do three yoga classes. [00:49:00] Three hour workouts with weights, three hour swims, swim, and you know, and basically that's what I do. I've been doing that for 50 years and since I was in my 30s, so actually in my 20s.
So
Adam Gragg: they're working out.
Eric Gragg: ~Yeah.~ Working out. So that keeps you there. And then also, you know, very, you know, don't drink and smoke. Those things, they all contribute to bad health. And so, you know, that's my main goal is to make sure, cause then also too, I try to do the workout and do some running, or do some ride the bike.
So I try to do a different exercise every day, and then play golf three days a week, so. So all of those things keep me busy and they keep me healthy.
Adam Gragg: How do you keep your mind healthy?
Eric Gragg: Yeah, that's, that keeps your mind healthy is [00:50:00] doing those things or just like running and you just, you just clears your mind completely.
Adam Gragg: And what, what else do you do to keep your mind healthy?
Eric Gragg: Read a lot. So I enjoy reading. And I enjoy watching, you know, like the soccer on TV. I enjoy that. That keeps your mind clear. So your mind, you're not thinking about anything when you're doing, watching something, but the best way for me is read, is reading.
Yeah. I mean, I love a good book and you give me a good book that clears my head. I'm in a different place.
Adam Gragg: So how did you, talking about organization and discipline, how did you organize your days? Back when you were earlier in your career as sales?
Eric Gragg: Well, first of all, you usually took over a territory from some, another salesman and he would give you tips and tell you who were the ones to focus on.
So then what I tried to do is if I had to cover like 200 miles in a day, [00:51:00] whatever city I went through, I made sure I stopped and said hello to the roofers, any roofing contractors, if there's around. Or insulation contractors. And then if I had extra time and there was a lumber yard close by the building, lumber yard would go in and make sure I stop in and I do that on a regular basis.
So the first call was just an introduction. There was no discussion other than maybe if I had a pamphlet on a new roofing product, I could leave that with them. And just say, hey, I'm coming through here once a month. I'll stop and see you next month. And if you happen to get in a situation where you need some roofing or a load of insulation you know, if you can't get through the distributor, call me and I can hook you or somebody.
Because it was allocated and it was, it was you couldn't get it. It was, you had to be a rotation of who could get [00:52:00] product, especially when we had the energy crisis of the eighties, insulation was allocated and to, you know, you could only get so much. So, so if I do those things and make sure that I see these people regularly, That took care of my planning.
So,
Adam Gragg: and then how did you organize your day when you got into commercial real estate?
Eric Gragg: Basically I had to, and it took me two years to make any money to figure it out. But you, first of all, start out leashing and you're working a building with another broker agent and if the market's flat, that's going to be very tough.
So, you know, but it's I made sure that I started cold calling and I drew a map of one industrial area in Sacramento that had maybe, maybe 300 industrial buildings in it. [00:53:00] And I made sure that I met every one of the owners and talked to them. And it took me like, took me six months or a year, something, and just talking to them, ~and ~call them and say, I've got a building, I'm just gonna stop by with a flyer, or I just cold call them, so I do either one, and then I had a map, and I had a map with every owner's phone number.
Every partial number, the dimensions of it, the size of the building. So I had everything, so I knew every inch of that area.
Adam Gragg: And how would you organize, like, so how would you stay motivated to talk to 300 businesses over 6 months? What was the motivation behind that?
Eric Gragg: Just to make a living, and commercial realtors who work properly make a very good living.
Okay. So, you know, so that was the key. Who taught you how to do that? Actually, [00:54:00] nobody. I taught myself, I think.
Adam Gragg: But somebody wasn't doing that? Like they were as disciplined? No, no. Did you, you didn't get inspiration from somebody else that was in the market as an agent that?
Eric Gragg: No, nobody did. Nobody did it like I did it.
Really? Yeah. ~I~ mean, you know, that actually call some people wait and just wait till somebody calls you and I wasn't going to wait, but. And and maybe I did to start, and that's why it took me a year and a half, two years to make any money. But then I made some good money.
Adam Gragg: Did you have, when some people, when they start having success in business, then, and I know for me, when, when I start, like I, I have a deal that I close or whatever, get a new business, then I start to let down like, Oh, I've got, you know, I can feel, I can let down now.
I don't like that though. How do you push forward through the success? Well, because
Eric Gragg: first of all, I know nothing's going to happen unless I do it. So it has to, you have to do, [00:55:00] do it.
Adam Gragg: But did you have success sometimes and want to let down then? Let go? I mean, you just kind of take your foot off the pedal, the gas so much?
Eric Gragg: Well, you take a break, you may go on vacation, something like that. And, but you know, it's I don't remember, I just do, you know, I was ready to retire when I retired and then it turned out I retired too early.
Adam Gragg: You've never retired, have you?
Eric Gragg: Yeah, so now I have, I'm basically trying now, even though I'm working on a couple of different projects and I've got builders that call me for lots.
And you know, and I find them and, you know, it's they're very expensive and all this stuff is now, so, but I was able to stay motivated because I needed to make a living and I had a family and I had three little kids,
Adam Gragg: you know. Who is your favorite of your three kids? I'm just kidding. I know. All right.[00:56:00]
Yeah. So that management, time management stuff. So you have any secrets, somebody's new and they're new in the sales kind of field and they get distracted because they're afraid. Any advice to help them to stay focused on making the calls?
Eric Gragg: Well, just to say you're, you're afraid with everything you do in life, if it's new.
And, you know, and I, everybody is, has got this fear. And I think that's the first thing you got to understand is you're not alone. You're you're, you know, you're everybody's like you, you're going to find some people that can't overcome this, but the ones that can overcome it and go out and make this a fun job.
Are the ones that are going to be the most successful.
Adam Gragg: You make it fun, even though it's scary. You make that scary fun. And you meet so
Eric Gragg: many nice people and you meet some smart people and you learn. And I think it's so,
Adam Gragg: a lot of business owners are some of the coolest people you'll ever meet. And they are humble and [00:57:00] they have so many.
They have a lot of generosity inside of them that they want to give and help other people. That's what I have found that they get a bad rap, but you meet them and it's like, where have you been? Because they're not flashy. That's one of the things you find. I find is that people, a lot of very successful people are not nearly as flashy as you think they are.
You think they would be, and, and they're willing to give you advice and feedback. And so I, I'm inspired by that because it's pretty cool that you meet some great people. So I would say for me, just hearing that, like, it could be really good when you meet new people.
Eric Gragg: Oh yeah, it's fantastic. And I remember that.
Adam Gragg: I remember you, you modeling that, like, don't be afraid to meet new people and make connections. And one thing I've heard from you as you talk is you would make connections with one business owner and then they would give you some, they would point you in the direction of another business owner, possibly,
Eric Gragg: or, or
Adam Gragg: they would give you some piece of advice that you weren't expecting about the area.
That was like a new piece of information that would help you to sell or to lease out a building that you wouldn't have [00:58:00] gotten.
Eric Gragg: Yeah, and the one thing about it is though, they won't tell you how much they paid or sold things, but there's ways to find out, you know. Why wouldn't they tell
Adam Gragg: you how much they paid for it?
Eric Gragg: Because, you know, they, you know, it's just Just
Adam Gragg: private. You can find out though. What
Eric Gragg: was funny was when I traveled to other towns and would stop and have lunch with a builder or architect, usually they would share some story with me. You know, about some business venture. And so you'd pick up all this information about outside business ventures and they would even tell you how much money they made personally sometimes.
That how, especially a lumberyard where the manager of the lumberyard gets a percentage and thing, everybody gets a percentage
Adam Gragg: yet.
Eric Gragg: So
Adam Gragg: it's funny. My, [00:59:00] my dad told me once when I was going through a big career challenge. Situation maybe 15, 18 years ago in the Great Recession actually. And I was not sure if I was gonna stay in the mental health field.
And I'm really glad I did. 'cause that led into career coaching and I wasn't employed for a period of time. And he said to go to like a wealthier neighborhood and just knock on the door and ask 'em what they do for a living. Just say you're looking at changing careers express, like I'm looking at changing careers and what do you, what do you do for a living?
You know? And, and that's a piece of advice that I remember actually, I didn't. I took that advice. I kind of put my own twist on it, but I was asking and met people that were, I didn't know. And I asked them cause I knew they were successful. And I asked them like how they made their living and got some really good pieces of advice through that.
It was, it was basically cold calls of people and finding out how they made their money. And they were
Eric Gragg: very successful. Yeah. Right. And they,
Adam Gragg: and they, they were willing to share how they, and whether it was like a a niche way that they made [01:00:00] money in an industry that I always would already was familiar with, like financial planning, or whether it was that they in a certain type of business that they had, like I remember people that owned restaurants, but they had a different way that they ran their restaurant that I thought was very unique and was exciting and interesting, or even people that they didn't actually own a restaurant.
the franchise. They owned a company that supported that specific franchise. I'm like, that's even a business. I mean, there were, there were ideas I didn't even know existed for making money because I was willing to actually ask some people, but it was inspired by my dad to go do that. And I, like I said, I mean, I put my own twist on it.
I didn't go out and do it the way he suggested it, but I did. I did do it and I got some information and I remember a real big shift in my life was made when I started to reach out to people and get more information and not be so afraid back then in 2008 and 2009 and then that actually helped me to start the business in 2012 that I have now and the career shift that I [01:01:00] made in the same industry basically but a new shift in that industry which has helped me greatly.
So one last question and we're going to wrap it up here. So if you had one piece of advice on business. And that you would want your grandchildren to know on having a successful career. What would that piece of advice be?
Eric Gragg: Well, ~I guess~ make sure that you are a good reader and, you know, I would say you need to, very helpful if you get, make sure you get out of college.
I think that's helpful. Okay. And that you know, don't be afraid of challenges and to make sure that you're always stay inquisitive and. Ask questions.
Adam Gragg: Inquisitive and ask questions. And that's what you did when you called on people.
Eric Gragg: Oh yeah. Just like with just, you mentioned that this neighborhood, you could, I mean, somebody could write a book on what people make.
Adam Gragg: Just go through this neighborhood, ask them what they do for a living, how they made their, their money. And they would [01:02:00] be, I would find, be very glad that it, because you're not a threat. You're not going to take over their business. You're not a competitor. They're, they're probably going to be very honored that you asked them for feedback on their success.
And that you want to learn from them, which most people are drawn to somebody that's really genuinely interested in their life.
Eric Gragg: Well, and things change too. Everything changes, ~but ~commercial real estate is basically the same today as it was 40 years ago. So there's some things ~like~ mental health. Mental health is changing.
Sure. ~You know, ~but, and commercial real estate is changing, but you still need commercial. The foundation is
Adam Gragg: the same. Yep. Like the foundation of mental health has been the same for 2, 000, 5, 000 years. I mean, it's, it's not, it's just different nuance. And, and so I read a quote that remind me of going to people and, Reaching out to them.
Like it was from Mary Kay who started Mary Kay Cosmetics, Mary Kay Ashe. She said, well, you know, remember when you look at somebody who's a potential client or customer, you know, [01:03:00] imagine having a sign around their neck saying, make me feel valuable, make me feel special, make me feel valuable. And if you go into the interaction, Remembering that everyone wants to feel valued and valuable.
It's going to help you to sell. And she built a huge, massive business through that mentality by people want to feel valued. Like if you talk to a stranger that owns a business and you ask them for their feedback, they, that's a way to help people feel valued. Invaluable because you want their advice, which is incredibly powerful kind of thing.
So, so let's go ahead and summarize. And so it's ways, three keys for you to ask for what you want, to reach out, to take a risk, and one of the keys was not cold calling, although that kind of is tied to the first key, which is just be courageous, take an action. You got to start doing something. So let's start, you know, the second one is to shift your mindset, your attitude about people, like my dad shared.
Hey, you know, see them as friendly. Don't see them as mean. You [01:04:00] know, when you go into a new interaction, have that kind of attitude and I've seen him do that, you know, so much so I have that kind of extroverted personality and I thank him for that because when I do go in interactions, a lot of times it's like this is exciting and fun and I can be my goofy wild self and you know, some people won't like that, but I can be myself and people are going to be attracted to that.
Ultimately, good people like you to be yourself. And the third one, is to be organized and to find systems to being organized, which I saw him do that. I know those things have changed somewhat, but a calendar and checking off the boxes and having a list and getting through that list is what I've seen you do.
And it's been really cool to see how that can play out in my own life as well. So I want you to Focus on right now, what is one thing that you want to take away from this podcast today? Some little nugget that ~you heard~ from my dad, Eric Gragg, or something that was shared, a story, whatever, that you want to apply to your life, that you can apply to your business, to your relationships, to situations in your life.
And I want you, by the end of the day today, [01:05:00] to make some kind of application. So, if you do something, If you want to make transformational changes in your life, 20 percent is insight. You're getting insight today, but 80 percent ~is~ action. What ~are you~ going to apply by the end of the day today? So, are you going to make a cold call or make a list or get organized or shift your mindset thinking that they could like me and not necessarily reject me?
Or I have a ton to offer to help them solve their problems. And it's not something I'm actually, I don't have to worry about. Offending them because I want to help them if I'm going to reach out to somebody new. So what are you going to take away and apply to your life? And if you really want to stick, teach it to somebody else.
Say, I learned this new thing today on the Decide Your Legacy podcast. So remember to sign up for Shatterproof Yourself Lite. Check it out. There's a four page worksheet. You print that off and go through it and then tell your friends about the podcast. Give it a rating and review. And review on Apple or Spotify, wherever you get your podcast content.
Really love you to let the help the word spread. That helps it to come up in feeds organically so more people can be [01:06:00] helped. So I want to close the same way that I always do. First, thanking my dad for coming on the show. Thank you very much. But I want to close the same way that I always do. Make it your mission to live the life now that you want to be remembered for 10 years after you're gone.
How do you want people to talk about you at Christmas? 10 years after you're gone. That's an important thing. You decide your legacy, nobody else. I appreciate you greatly and I will talk to you soon. Thanks for tuning in. Bye bye.