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In this inspiring podcast episode, Christine Spratley discusses the importance of stepping out of your comfort zone and trying new things. Reflecting on her own journey, including her experience participating in a triathlon despite her initial lack of swimming skills, Christine emphasizes the power of doing things for the first time. She delves into the mental, physical, and emotional benefits of continuous learning and curiosity, citing studies from Harvard and the National Institute on Aging. With personal anecdotes and humor, she challenges listeners to engage in new activities across personal, professional, spiritual, and physical areas of life. Whether it's learning a new recipe, tackling a fresh challenge at work, or exploring a different aspect of spirituality, this episode encourages everyone to embrace the unknown and thrive.
00:00 Introduction and Welcome
01:44 Christine's Triathlon Journey
04:54 The Importance of Trying New Things
06:22 Curiosity and Cognitive Health
09:56 Embracing Challenges and Growth
13:58 Women Supporting Women
23:29 Personal Growth and Atomic Habits
25:34 Discovering Comedy in Different Languages
26:53 Spreading Joy Through Small Acts
28:25 Taking Risks in Professional Life
32:13 Embracing New Experiences in Business
33:53 Exploring Spirituality and Philosophy
35:37 Understanding Physical Health and Wellness
38:24 The Importance of Trying New Things
44:33 Reflecting on Time and Experiences
Creators and Guests
What is F*ck Fear with Christine Spratley: Living Like a Head Bitch In Charge ?
This podcast is for anyone who wants to live like an HBIC—or lives with, works with, marries, dates, or is raising one. Let’s be real: being a Head Bitch in Charge is messy, bold, and unapologetically badass. This is not a guidebook—it’s a pantry.
My guests and I will share the ingredients that we use—what’s worked and what’s failed—as we say “fuck fear” and take action to live a fulfilled life. We cover real-life hacks and deep philosophical pillars to navigate the chaos of everyday life—where some days, my only accomplishment is having a bra on and my teeth brushed.
We’re tackling the daily shit women navigate, from workplace politics to relationships, raising kids, and building careers, all with humor, audacity, and zero filters.
So, tune in—tell your friends, and even your enemies. This isn’t about aging with grace—it’s about aging with mischief, audacity, and a damn good story to tell.
[00:00:00]
Kristine Spratley: Tubs, ladies and gentlemen. Hello. I am actually, um, . Really excited to be here. Christine Spratley. Fuck. Fear with Christine Spratley living like an HBIC.
So welcome and, um, I'm really excited, Joe, about today's podcast. Um, I had . Been thinking about some things and some ideas, and again, it's like what's in the pantry? You know, what, [00:01:00] what things can we give, um, can I share with you that I have either received from other women or practice, um, and spread them and sprinkle them or dump them a gallon or so into whatever.
You know, recipe you're making. Today I'm going to bring into the pantry the idea. When was the last time you did something for the first time? And just marinate on that for a little while and, um. I that give you some, where that phrase came from and I think it was, 'cause I haven't looked this up, so someone checked the facts.
Um, but it was in 2012, I think, where there was the, the triathlons called the Dance Skin Triathlon. And I had decided that I wanted to do a triathlon. Um, and [00:02:00] I was living in Austin, Texas at the time, and a little bit about this is I. To gear up for that. 'cause I couldn't swim. I mean, I could swim, but I couldn't like do any sort of like long distance swimming.
I mean, I could swim to the other side of the pool 'cause I could swim across and back. And that's what it took to get into the deep end when I was a kid. So that's as much as I could swim. And I wasn't a water water girl at all, so I had to go into the Y and learn how to swim. But I remember doing a practice run up to the danskin and the practice run was at a
At a fitness place in, um, Austin, and I think it was like, I, I can't remember the name, but B Caves Fitness Center or something like that. It was on B Caves Road, and it was an indoor, indoor, um, bike, a c indoor bike pool, swim, indoor bike, and then a run. You ran kind of a run circuit around this kind of outdoor in the woods track.
And I, I was [00:03:00] such a bad swimmer. That , my boyfriend at the time, Brett, you've heard me speak of Brett before. Literally I was, I was getting LA and he was sitting, watching. So first of all, he was out of bed on a Saturday morning way earlier than he wanted to be. But then he was watching a bunch of, a bunch of women.
Um, and, and I was getting lapped. By really old and as he put it, fat people. And, and he was like, and he was so, he, he was yelling, go, go . And I just remember being so like, it was like I could, and for some reason I could hear him and I was like, I can't, I can't now. Now mind you, my comeback to him after we all got, 'cause he was like, why didn't you go?
And I was like. I have all this muscle and those people had all this buoyancy and, and well, there, that was that too. But they were also really good swimmers. And, um, so, so that was my lead up to the dance skin. And, um, and [00:04:00] so when the dance skin came around, there's this woman, her name is Sally Edwards, and I didn't realize this at the time, and um, but she was 63.
And she used to come in and she used to do these kickoff kind of talks and, um, in these cities that they would do these, um, triathlons in, and Jans skin is all women. And she would go in and she'd be like, yay, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I didn't realize that she was that old. And, um, so I'm, you know, way younger than I am now, and I'm listening to her and everything and that she unveils this big poster for it.
And it was this, and I still have it framed and it, it was, you know, when was the first time you did, when was the last time you did something For the first time and because we were celebrating doing something for the first time, so. I wanted to take this because as I've talked about fulfillment and why this [00:05:00] matters, is what I realized when looking back at why, not just why I wasn't fulfilled, but how did I get there, because that's how I learned not to go there again.
And one of the things that I did, and one of the, the kind of things that kept coming up and talking . That I noticed was I wasn't doing things for the first time. I was doing a lot of the same things and getting into the habit of, of comfort and, you know, my comfort zone and, and all of that and, and the things that I would maybe do one big thing for the first time.
But what I do now and what I look at now is I wanna do little things. because for me, doing the little things that are new and that are different, um, are a lot harder because there's no excuse not to do 'em today. [00:06:00] So my challenge as we listen to this is not only to think about when was the last time you did something for the first time, but what is the first thing that, what is the thing you could do today for the first time?
And I'll take you through all of this and, and things like that. The other thing that I wanna region reach out to you about and, and kind of say why this matters is that, you know, physically and there's a study done by Harvard Center on Center on Developing Child, and you may go, well, this is a development of a child study, but it's about the neuroplasticity and, and we all know if you don't exercise your muscles,
You don't, you know, they, they, they don't stay the same. You have to continue to use them and, and you have to do certain things to make them grow, but you have to at least do certain things to make them stay. And when I don't do [00:07:00] things for the first time, I'm not using that muscle of curiosity. So I want to kind of tackle this from the side of curiosity and when I'm not trying to be curious about something.
There's no looking for the first time to do something. There's no looking for change for me. I'm not curious, and I talked about this before for me, when I quit looking at myself because I was shut down this part of my life and I wasn't fulfilled, it meant that my level of curiosity and my willingness to explore questions, new things, new aspects of a situation, big or small.
Got a little bit less and less and less. And for me, I couldn't just compartmentalize and say, okay, I'm just gonna ignore this part of my life, you know, this section. So I numbed it [00:08:00] and then it numbed my curiosity and the others. And before long I was doing the same thing. My comfort zone, but I was extremely uncomfortable.
That's what's really wild, is how I call it my comfort zone. But I'm extremely uncomfortable in there. You know, I call it that itchy sweater, you know, 'cause I'm allergic to wool and I love wool, but man, it's that itchy sweater on there. So think about it, you know, it's physically necessary for me to do things different.
Um, and that means my mind. My mind is engaged in both my physical aspect but also my spiritual aspect. The way I communicate in relationships. It, it, it in all of that. And then there's also another study and I'm kind of, um, interested in this because the older that I get the more, um, I'm. Aware you may call it, of [00:09:00] cognitive decline.
And, um, I, you know, Joe, we were laughing about, I was telling you about my, my . My brain fog with my menopause . And you start sitting here going, what's going on? You know, what's going on up here? I need to pay attention. And what can I do to engage my thoughts to make them crisp? And, um, the Stanford, um, longevity Center has a study out there that found that continual learning reduces the risk of cognitive decline in oppression.
That sounds . Really great. Right? It sounds like it makes sense. We all kind of know that, but if I'm not learning anything and doing things for the first time, which is how I learn, that's for me how I learn. I'm doing it different for the first time, and that's what we're gonna talk about a little bit more is what doing something for the first time looks at.
But again, I think one of the reasons why [00:10:00] I. Stopped looking at and trying to do things different was because, yeah, there's the failure of failure. Fuck, fear. This is what it's about. You know, there's the, we call it perfectionism, but we talked about that last time too, is that perfection is just me wanting to control the outcome of the response.
Whereas if I was really trying to be a perfectionist, I would put it out there, screw up, fail. Learn epically and do it again and get it perfect. And then there's the other reason of, you know, the comfort zone, the routine. Um, but one of the things that is interesting is I. The play of dopamine, and I know this is sciences I'll get, 'cause I'm gonna get screwed up here in a little bit, but I did, you know, and how dopamine, you know, it's the, it's the fun drug I call it.
And, and it motivates us to do things [00:11:00] different. Well, when I don't have any of that, again, I go back to that. I don't wanna look at the stuff that makes me uncomfortable. Well, if I numb that and I stay in that routine and I don't have anything that gets me excited or gets me . You know, going, my brain literally shrinks when it's not challenged, and I didn't realize that.
I didn't realize that as I was staying in my routine, as I was staying safe, as I was not failing, as I was doing all of this stuff, my brain not engaged, shrinks. So, and that there's a study by the National Institute on Aging that found that that, that learning new skills helps delay memory loss and cognitive decline.
Again, wanna sign me up there, but think about, or I did as a woman, [00:12:00] how much I spend swallowing emotions and uncomfortable situations rather than change. What that does to my body. I, I've, I've mentioned the, the book, women Are Angry by Jennifer Cox and talked about, you know, what it does to swallow anger or to swallow those things.
But also when I am not growing, I'm also swallowing. I'm not changing. I'm not adding. And so, you know that stay in your lane, that stay in my lane. Leads to me in that routine that goes on and on and on in that comfort zone that is no longer comfortable, extremely uncomfortable, and extremely heavy. And so I need to ask myself, when was the last time I did something for the first time?
So there's four areas that I wanna tackle today, and I want to do it in a way [00:13:00] that is, you wanna go out and run a marathon. Or do a triathlon, go for it. I was telling Joe, I was like reading um, about Sally Edwards again 'cause I was getting prepared for this and I didn't realize that when she was talking to me, she was 63 and she was doing like triathlons at 63 and kicking ass at 63.
Um, and I didn't realize that then, but I was like, oh, wow. Well I guess that means I could do that. 'cause I'm not 63 yet. I'm 54, so I've got some time. And then I was like, well, I don't know if I wanna do that.
Joe Woolworth: I just did some research on her. She did triathlons for 22 years and did 130.
Kristine Spratley: Yeah. In Danskin. She is the famous last finisher and what it is, um, she literally did that. So there was no woman left behind, no woman. You knew when you started that, that you were not gonna finish last, which was an.
I look back now, I had no [00:14:00] clue about that, but I look back that now and that is way, what we women do is in our tribe and our groups and our girlfriends. That is so what we women do. And if you don't have, I will throw down on this. If ladies, if you do not have a tribe that doesn't leave you, that, that leaves you behind, fire that fucking tribe.
Seriously. Go find you some, go find you some that won't because they're out there. It took me a long time to find, but find them, um, because they'll go into battle with you and then they bring your ass out wounded and all, and that is what's amazing. But I thought, I thought that was so incredible. Now looking back again, I didn't realize how strong that was, but that was the reason why she was the last finisher.
Joe Woolworth: Yeah. That's pretty cool. Yeah.
Kristine Spratley: So anyway, it's a
Joe Woolworth: co-founded Fleet Feet. Yeah. That's pretty cool.
Kristine Spratley: Um, and that, and then that switched off into something, which is a whole nother area that she went into, [00:15:00] which was an, another thing about her was she came up with a lot of the trainings for women to do triathlons and running.
When I ran my marathon, I did it through a training program through, um, fleet Feet in Austin, and it was the first program that I had ever been to that was like, okay, we're gonna start and you're gonna walk. For five minutes and you're gonna run for due and then you, and, and we just built up there. And that's how I built up to do my marathon.
And, um, and it was pretty incredible. Um, I really, really enjoyed that. And, and again, shout out and thank you to the women, to the old broads that did it and did it before us and, and did it out of the generosity of their heart and, and, and, and showed that you could do this and. I laugh at this because I will tell you about my triathlon experience there.
When I did the dance skin. Two things I'll point out that was, we're on this tangent a little bit about women. Um, [00:16:00] first of all, I went and I did it, and, and there was a woman, we kind of were around the same. We'd come out of the swim and, you know, about the same time, and then you go to your thing and you get your bike and whatever.
And so we came out of the swim and she was, she was . To the left, and my bike was to the right, on the right side of the, of the runway thing. And she sat down and she started eating pieces of chocolate cake. I'll never forget this. And me being young, I'm like, kick ass. I don't know whose ass I'm gonna kick, but I'm gonna kick ass.
And, um, and, and I I was like, wow, that's weird. And I was like, I remember looking at her going, that's a piece of chocolate cake. What? I didn't know you could do that. Like I didn't even remotely cross my mind. But then two, so then I go and I take off on my bike and I'm biking, biking, biking, and um, and came back and somehow she was already there ahead of me [00:17:00] eating a fucking piece of chocolate cake
Joe Woolworth: She, she's doing a different kind of triathlon.
Kristine Spratley: So, so like she is not only sitting there. Sitting in transition, eating a piece of chocolate cake, she's also kicking my ass in whatever section of the triathlon that we were doing. So, so I'm, I'm confused because the bike was really, you know, I was doing good on the bike and, you know, so I'm gonna make my rain my way up.
And when you transition from the bike to the run, it's the brick, which basically your legs are like, ugh. And um, and I remember. Running and what they do, I don't know if they still do it 'cause it's been a while, but they put your age on your, on, on the back of your leg. They put it on my, on my, I can't remember if it was on my back of my thigh or my ankle or ankles, but I, so you know, the runner in front of you's age
And I remember running up this hill and there was this woman that came up behind me and she just, and her age was like 56. [00:18:00] I was like, bitch . And um, and then I got, I got done. I was all excited and there was this woman eating the piece, chocolate cake. And she just at again, she had beat me somewhere in the run and she finished before me and ate a piece of chocolate cake.
And I divert into that conversation, that story about women and for two reasons. One. Again, shout out to the 56-year-old rather than me. If you're younger and you're getting your ass kicked by an older woman in business, in whatever, in athletics, you too can do that. You too can be that age and I mean, that's what they're showing you.
They're showing you how to show up and that's what Sally was doing was showing at 63. This is how you can show up as a woman, which is pretty incredible. So I. Have had to learn, or I've chosen to learn. I haven't had to learn because I, there's times when I didn't to [00:19:00] not be angry at the women that are kicking my ass that are older than me or better than me, or even younger, that are kicking my ass, but.
I can do that too. And that's what it's shown me. And the other thing that it showed me was so shout out to them and embrace that. Embrace that, God, you can do that at this age. Whoa, that's awesome. Let's go show all the little girls that you don't have a timeframe in which to do things again if you're willing to do something new.
For the first time, you can always do it. If you haven't success, if you haven't succeeded at 50, fuck you can succeed at 55. If you haven't done it yet, it's gonna be the first time, so go do it. And that's what it showed me. And the other thing was that woman eating chocolate cake. And I was such a hard ass around most of the stuff that I've done in my life around succeeding.
And you know, I was extremely competitive. I still am. Um. [00:20:00] And I'm gonna tell on myself, and again, I'll get back to this, but I am this competitive and this is such a humbling experience when I, I, my company Deloitte, decided, oh, pickleball. And they put together a Deloitte pickleball thing and we would go and we would play, and it was a bunch of new people and my husband went and he loved it.
And, um, so then we started playing, you know, we'd go to rec centers around Raleigh, whatever. So then I think it was Turbo. Turbo.
Joe Woolworth: And there's a big divide between people that take it seriously and people that are just wanting to chill.
Kristine Spratley: Well, , lemme tell you about that. I am extremely competitive, but at the time that I was playing, I was not in any shape.
I was like talk about not doing anything for the first time. And also my body had started to age because I wasn't doing anything. So the muscle was literally going away and I had, my asthma was not under control, so I was, you know, [00:21:00] but I had my competitive attitude, , you know, I was just, my competitive attitude will just make up for everything.
So I would get out there and it was just miserable. I was so miserable. But, but this is, you know, like when you're the last kid picked in the playground mm-hmm . Okay. We've all had that. So I, I was probably, I think I was 52 maybe. And of course I'm not having any fun in my life at all, but I'm doing the things like I'm playing pickleball.
So we go and I think it was terrible and or Lions or somewhere and . You go and you sign up and then people sign up below you and you know, you put your name on the next open slot. So I sign up and I'm watching, and you know, my name's not called. And so I, you know, for a while I'm like, okay, whatever. But then teams start coming off, so I know that there's enough people to sign up.
And what had happened was they were skipping my name. So they would just, so there's my [00:22:00] name and then there's like four here, four here, four here. . Like nobody would play with me 'cause I sucked so bad. And, um, and I say that because again, that's how I had, I'd been so competitive my whole life and it was so humbling to not to be the last kid picked on the playground at 52.
Um. I have since somewhat gotten in better shape and better health and, and, um, you know, are doing that with the ladies that I play with now. Um, they at least play with me. But again, I say all that to kind of divert back into, you know, I. I lived hard. I lived to be competitive and I lived, but yet, when I was doing all that, that was the routine I was in.
I wasn't doing anything. I, I can't say anything 'cause I was doing a lot of things new, but things that really pushed me, things that, that, that pushed my spirit, that, that gave me something that [00:23:00] really was outside that bubble of comfort zone. And so. Shout out again to all the women that showed me, you know, see, Ali Edwards was 63.
I can do a, I can do a dance skin triathlon at 63 if I want to. I'm not sure I'm willing to go there yet, but if I want to, so coming back in, how do we do this? Where do we do it? And you don't need to go run a fricking dance. You don't need to run triathlon. Okay. I, I mentioned this a little bit earlier. I believe in anatomic habits.
In Atomic Habits. The book, it talks about start small, and so you can repeat it and you can have success and you can, you know, like make it, I call it bite size. And so when I go into my personal life and I look at, you know, what is the one thing you're gonna do today in your personal life for the first time?
Maybe it's, I don't [00:24:00] know. I don't know what that is. Maybe it's, you know, we can talk about having the conversations you don't wanna have, maybe it's telling a joke or, or trying on humor in, in a personal setting that, that, that exposes a side of you that you weren't, you know, I remember, um, sending out, I did the mugshot thing, but I remember like.
There's some mug on there that I'm like, do I send this out or really show them? Like, I'm really this kooky in the head. Yes. I said, kooky. I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm, that's an old person's word, . Um, but I did screw it. So engage. How do you wanna engage in something in your personal life for the first time?
You know, again, maybe it's talking about your kids. Maybe it's like, Hey, I wanna tell you about my music. Let's talk about music. I, I don't know. So lemme ask you how, what is something in your personal life like that you would do for the first time? That's a, like, you [00:25:00] should just, his, the camera's not on him, but his eyes just went like, what?
But that's kind of an interesting thought.
Joe Woolworth: Yeah, I feel like, like professionally, I feel like I do new stuff all the time. 'cause the nature of my job. Um, I do have a, I do like adventure, so I'm always looking to do new stuff, but I think in like small little things that I haven't done, that's a problem with being old.
You've done a lot of stuff. Yeah. ,
Kristine Spratley: like, I don't know. Could it be to learn to cook something different? Could it be learn to try a recipe? Could it be learn to ? , you know, watch a video on something. Watch a different, I started watching comedy and I started watching comedy of different types. I started watching comedy, standup comedians in foreign languages.
Now what's, if you wanna tell a good comic. Comedian. I don't know if I said that right. But comedian, if they can make you laugh when reading subtitles, that shit's good. Yeah. But again, it's the first thing. Now what that [00:26:00] did is I, I now have friends, um, women friends in France and, and Britain and all over, because I've inter interacted with them because of their comedy.
so what is it, what is that one thing that you're just gonna go, I'm gonna do this a little different today. I, I remember when I decided. Um, to start adding a little bit of joy in my life. And the way that [00:27:00] I get joy is by making other people laugh or, you know, just trying to, you know, put a little of that unicorn, sprinkle sparkle dust in their life.
You, I know it sounds weird, but I do it. And I remember getting on the elevators working at Deloitte Loit and get on the elevator and there's this woman there, and it was in the morning, like nobody was fricking awake. We're all like, ugh. And um, and I said something mate cracked a joke. Of some sort, just something little.
And she just, you know, she just kind of giggled. And that was, that was the first time that I did that. And my husband was like, what? Do you know her? And I was like, no. And I was like, but then I started just, so now I do that regularly. But again, it was, there was the first time I. I remember talking to someone about that and they're like, well, aren't you like, what if they say they don't laugh?
I'm like, well, I don't know 'em, so don't really give a shit like they, what's
Joe Woolworth: great about that is you only gotta learn one joke to do that.
Kristine Spratley: listen to
Joe Woolworth: you every time you get in an elevator. There's always just gotta one joke. There's,
Kristine Spratley: but see, the point though is not [00:28:00] that you only learn to learn one joke, but you can learn one joke.
But again, it was, it was relevant. To the particular situation. But again, you do that one thing and it's new and then you open up a door and now I do it. I do lots of different things like that all the time where I just, I decided I'm just gonna sprinkle some, some laughter in somebody's life because kind of I need it to.
So where in that personal life now, professional. I think a lot of people, for me, I thought I was learning stuff all the time in new ways to do this, new ways to do that. But I wanna . Which I was. Um, but again, how big is that risk and that reward? And I always like to say, why am I willing to fail on a small stage but not succeed on a big one?
You know, and I, I think I've mentioned this before in a podcast in one of my earlier episodes, is that I always wanna get to the big stage, but I gotta start at the small [00:29:00] stage and just work my way up and. Yeah, you don't, you know, you don't wanna get there before, you know, but what, well, if I could just go to the big stage and start, because that's where I wanna be.
So if I could just maybe go, I, maybe I have a 50 50 chance of succeeding. I don't know what that percentage, but, but why not stand on that stage? Because eventually I'm gonna have to get there. Anyway, that's where I really wanna go, which is a whole nother question, but . Why am I willing to just stay small or stay in my comfort or not do something new that puts me out there in business?
I remember, and this tells you a lot about my, my mental state, not my mental state, but just my, my, my mindset and my framework. I came across extreme, I think very confident. I was told by others that I came across very confident in what I did, but I would sit there and. Send something, send an email to partner, principal or managing director.
We called him PPDs, [00:30:00] and I would get so nervous, like I would, I would've read, written that email, like, and read it and, and I was talking to someone, a, a former colleague of mine, we were talking about that, you know, where you just, you send it and it goes off and you're like, oh God, but. I think back now, and there were so many times when I, when I wanted to do something different, I wanted to bring in an idea, I wanted to call something out.
I wanted to say, Hey, I don't think this is, this is right. You know, let's do this over here. Or I had an idea and I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't engage that way for the first time. And then when I started to, I was told in a very HR way that I needed to start selling more. And, um, after, you know, 13 years, I was like, they were like, Hey, you need to, and it's a numbers game, I get it.
But, so I was like, all right, well I'm gonna sell and, and, [00:31:00] um, but I hated selling. I hated the way that they sold. I never sold my way. So for me, the first time that I sold my way, um, was very interesting. It was very different. And I remember having a conversation with Brandon, and I don't know if I've said this before on a podcast or not, but he basically said, Christine, I don't know who told you, maybe Paul told you maybe somebody, but somebody told you a long time ago that you couldn't sell and you bought that bullshit.
And he's like, you can, you're just not, you're not doing it your way. So, you know, whatever. So I remember the first time I engaged differently in my own way. I really do. And I would, I had a long career before this happened and um, and it was risky. I felt the adrenaline, I felt the holy shit. 'cause there's nothing to hide behind.
You know, when you're standing there, there's nothing to hide behind. And, um, and the response was immediate and it was good. [00:32:00] Then I had a bunch of immediate, not good ones, . Um, but then I had good one, you know, and I, and you find, you find your client, you find what, you know, you find your, your rhythm, your mojo, or whatever you call that.
But again, in business, so like I, this is all new for me, even. And I'll ex I'll, I'll tell on our myself. Yesterday we, we did some taping and I had worked on this podcast, gonna do this podcast, gonna do this episode. It's gonna be good. And . And, and we, I came in here and I did it twice and it sucked both times.
So, and I had a first, the not, not, wasn't that it sucked, that was my first, I've done lots of things and they've sucked. But the first was, and this was interesting, Joe, is I told you this before we got on the started today. I said the, I've never had an interaction where someone said, okay, we'll just put that on the shelf.
It sucks. We'll put that on the shelf. We'll look at it. You can pick it up. We [00:33:00] can maybe do something with it later, whatever, but we'll just put it on the shelf. And so this is all new. Um, I, I, I had a conversation this morning with someone about, and this is how new it is, about six months ago, or nine, or maybe nine, I was, the first time I'd ever been on TikTok and watched it.
And like three hours later underneath the covers, I'm scrolling, but, but again, I was like, and I remember texting bright, being like, Hey, what the hell? And he is like, yeah, you know, but, so this is all new, this format, this forum. I'm old school Big four. And you know that, so business is new, but again, there's some of this funness about asking why, and you know.
Getting out there and doing it and, and just for the first time, I will tell you the [00:34:00] next area is spirituality and, and maybe your religion. So you call it religion, but your spiritual life. And for me, that's what am I doing there? How can I engage differently? Um. I practice stoicism. Now, that was a first, and it's not a a, a religion, it's more of a, a philosophy, but it helps me get to a place of understanding and, um, higher thought and communication with that, with my higher power.
Um, so is there something, how can you engage differently there? What's one little thing? What's one little thing you can learn? That's different. That's new. That's outside of what you normally think. Do an act for the first time and just tip, tip your toe in it. Just test it out. Just, you know, it's kinda like a taste, you know?
And that's the way life is. Life is [00:35:00] really a smartest sports, a taste and figure out what works. We've talked about this pantry. Figure out what works. But, but go out there. I mean, if you don't go to the grocery store and buy the shit, you, you don't get the shit in your pantry. So, and, and the only way, you know, we all go try on clothes.
And even if we don't try 'em on before we buy 'em, when we get 'em home, we try 'em on. Or sometimes we go, oh wow, that's a really ugly color. There's no way that's gonna fit over. That's like the size of one, you know, leg and, and, and I have three that need to fit in there, you know? So what is that? What is that one thing?
And then I was talking about physical, so let's bring in physical. I will tell you my experience as a woman, I did not, and I was a boxer, so I knew a lot of physical and I worked out and everything, but I did not understand and know about my body, the power of my [00:36:00] body, the physical power of my body inside of what happens to me.
Um. And so I have been learning a lot and I'm getting ready. Tomorrow is the, my follow-up. Um, I'm starting hormone replacement therapy. Yay. Um, please make this fricking brain fog and sweats and hot flashes and, and just all this crap, you know, level out just a little bit. I think she said that, you know.
Because again, there's all this myths and stuff out there, but then there's some truths out there. So you know, I'll, I'll bring you along on that journey, but that's a first, just even really learning about this and having conversations about this and women, if you're listening and you're younger and you haven't hit menopause or perimenopause, what is going on with your body?
Do you know? How are you asking? Ask some questions. Engage in a, [00:37:00] engage with your O-B-G-Y-N, engage with your lady friends, different. You know, okay, ladies, what you're thinking about having a family. I was talking to a, a woman a couple weeks ago and she, you know, they, they're thinking about doing, having another kid and okay, well engage with that differently.
Ask what happens to my body now? What happens to my financial ability now? What's gonna happen to my, you know, 'cause again, that affects . Um, there's a stat out there, and I don't know the per specific stat, but you know, when women have children, it is, it's a known fact that we make, we lower our overall career lifetime, um, earnings, you know, and that's not, we can choose to do that, but have that conversation, get, get, maybe it's, get information.
Maybe it's, get information about what that means to do that. Maybe it's looking under the covers, you know, physical, [00:38:00] maybe it's, maybe it's, you know, asking for what I want in bed or saying, Hey, I don't like that, don't do that. Um, or, or I don't wanna do that. Can we do something else to, to, to make, to, you know, so you can have pleasure or, you know, or exploring.
I, I don't know, but what's one little thing? Maybe it's eating something different. I, again, I don't know, but why are we not doing something for the first time? Why am I not doing it? What am I, what am I afraid of? Or what, you know? And if I'm not afraid of doing it, then why am I not doing it? And as I'm talking,
I can just hear myself go, well, I'm busy, I'm driving, I'm listening to this podcast. I got shit to do today. I got, I'm driving to the, you know, the kids are yapping in the background, or I'm driving home from work, or I've gotta get dinner on the, you know, okay, start [00:39:00] there. Maybe it's podcast goes off and you start talking to your kids about some, tell, ask 'em, tell you a joke, you know, ask 'em, tell you a joke.
Or maybe it's, Hey. Tonight for dinner, we're gonna do something different. I wanna try this recipe. Or, you know what, we're gonna, we always eat this on this and we're not gonna do that. I don't know, but that's what I'm saying. Don't miss the opportunity to do it different. And again, you can always go back.
I'm, I'm, I mean, I'm, I can always go back. You've heard me say this before, Joe. You know, I can always turn around and stop. I know how to do what I've been doing. All those four areas of my life. And so just because I start something doesn't mean I have to follow through and continue it. It means I can turn around and go back anytime I want to.
But then if that's the case, [00:40:00] why am I not doing it? Why am I not, and I'm not asking. Again, if you wanna go. Run a marathon or, you know, do this or that. Maybe you need to rip the bandaid off and do something big. But for me, the more, the little stuff I do, the more foundation I have of doing the big stuff, the more insights I get about, you know, list.
Okay. An example, I did something for the first time, um, went and had a. A facial for Valentine's Day. It was my gift for myself. And a friend of mine had given me this new lady's name, level up skincare Raleigh. They're not paying me. Um, she's Sahara is an amazing woman. So I'm like, all right, I got a 20% off game on.
I'm broke. Let's go do this. Um, and it's Valentine's, so whatever. I go in Saturday and. I'll just tell you, if you're in Raleigh, you need to go. And I, and I'm kind of a facial snob, just level set. [00:41:00] And so, um, I've had a lot of different facials and everything absolutely amazing was not my first. So that's not my first, um, my first was a lot of the other stuff she did in the experience, but what my first, that I took out of there was, is she didn't play spa music.
I hate spa music. I freaking hate. I, I don't hate it, but it's just 'cause it's gotta be the right kind. And she played, um, and, and it, it was, and again, this may turn some people off, but try it. I think, you know, 'cause I'm really, like I said, I'm a sp, I'm a facial snob, spa snob, whatever. And it was Lebanese instrumental.
Relaxation music. Didn't even know that there was that shit out there.
Joe Woolworth: That's not a very popular category on , on Amazon. I
Kristine Spratley: have no idea. It may be very popular. Just not like, you know, so, [00:42:00] so I was like, what is this music? And she's like, well, it's this and it's the perfect music. Again, I had to find my groove on Spotify 'cause there's lots of different, even within that category or genre or whatever the frick you wanna call it, there's all these different things.
But that was my first, that's in my, that's in my playlist when I go to, when I go relax at night. Now again, just something different. Just something different. I learned a little bit about a culture and Wow. Okay. Yes. So that's on my playlist along with 50 cent and um, TLC, salt and Pepper, Missy Elliot, along with Foo Fighters, REM, Bob Seger Queen, you know, so put it in there, put the kitchen sink in there, and try something a little different.
No, I'm not gonna listen to it every, every, every day. But it's got its place. It's in my pantry now. And it's in yours now. So what [00:43:00] is that one thing that you're gonna do for the first time? Get excited about it. Freaking email me, tweet me. I don't know. Get on social media and let me know, but try it. Try it.
And it could be horrible. I'm not saying it's gonna be great, but at least you go check. Done, been there, done that. Don't wanna do it again. Next, what's the next one thing you wanna do for the first time? But if you've asked yourself, when was the last time I did something for the first time? And it's been a while, and you know what a while is for you, a while is different for every one of us, but you know, it's been too long.
You're in that rigid comfort zone that is not comfortable anymore, or maybe it's really comfortable, well then you should have all the confidence to be trying something new. So why? And more importantly, not even looking at why. Why don't you just go do, [00:44:00] just go do and see what happens? Because the more I do and the more I experience.
Like, that's the point of it. I've said this before, it's about the most participation trophies at the end of the day. I mean, think about that. And I, I do, I sit here sometimes and I think about, wow. And it's not wasted time, but I don't get that time back. I'm gonna bring up something Joe. I'm gonna leave you with this because this is another way to look at this.
When I came and brought this topic up, you told me about another phrase that you had heard.
Joe Woolworth: Mm-hmm .
Kristine Spratley: You wanna tell, tell me what that was?
Joe Woolworth: Yeah, we were, you were talking about when was the, so this is about when the fir, or when's the last time you did something for the first time? I remember, I can't remember when I heard it, but it was a [00:45:00] talk that somebody was given and it was, they basically reminded you that there was gonna be a last time in your life for everything.
The thing that he said was there's gonna be a last time, like you hold your kids, like you pick up your kids. And my kids are older now. My oldest is like 17 and I picked her up last week, , because that really bothered me. I was like, yeah, that's a really bummer of a statement. Um, and I don't think it means you should pick up your teenage kids, but
Kristine Spratley: every day
But again, so, so, but I take that a little bit farther in thought. We assume we're always gonna have another time, another time to do something for the first time.
Joe Woolworth: Yeah,
Kristine Spratley: I assume I'm going to be able to get another shot at it, or go on this or do this or become this, or say this question. I'll have another shot to propose my thoughts or to articulate this and, and that's not guaranteed.
Time is not guaranteed. [00:46:00] Time is not guaranteed. And um, you know, I, there was the, the plane crash a few weeks ago. Um, and you look at the, the youth on that plane and the old, but the youth especially, and that's just not guaranteed. So again, what am I waiting for? What am I waiting for? I don't wanna wait. I want to do something for the first time.
As soon as possible. As much as possible. So take that ladies. Let me know how it's working for you. Let me know you the big epic ones and the tiny little ones that are really big and epic because they're the hard ones, you know. Again, your size is just right size, so whatever you choose to do, it doesn't matter.
Just do [00:47:00] and let me know and until then you are enough. This is amazing. And tugs ladies.