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A space to settle in and listen, and see where the episode takes you. This inspiring, reflective podcast is an invitation to travel deeper, with compassionate self-enquiry.
Henny shares insights from her own life, alongside practices that help us connect with our inner wisdom, explore our relationship with change and find a greater sense of flow. Henny believes we all hold our own answers, so there are no one-size-fits-all solutions here. This is a space to be with what’s true for you, and to grow from there.
If you’re drawn to slowing down, listening in, and exploring what it means to live with greater authenticity, this podcast is for you. Guided by psychology, mindfulness, therapeutic coaching, flow journaling, and everyday compassion, we explore ideas that help us step further into our inner worlds, in order to shape the changes we seek in our outer worlds.
Hey my darlings, I wasn't going to begin a new season of the podcast until after the new year but something something called me back so this may end up being a bonus episode and perhaps we begin would it be season nineteen? I think it might be golly in January. Welcome to the Henny Flynn podcast, the space for deepening self awareness with profound self compassion. I'm Henny, I write, coach and speak about how exploring our inner world can transform how we experience our outer world, all founded on a bedrock of self love. Settle in and listen and see where the episode takes you.
Henny:So I really just wanted to say hello and how are you? I've had some beautiful messages from people while I've been off doing the things I've been doing and it's so heartwarming to know that you love to be here as much as I love to be here and I really hope this finds you well and happy and safe and at ease. I have just been recording an episode of A Piece of Quiet and it was all about, exploring the sensation of kindness and as I was listening back, you know, it's part of the editing process, although I edit very lightly, but you know, just to make sure there aren't any sort of blips or funny sounds. I was thinking about the beautiful community that gather each week to listen to a piece of quiet, you know, not everybody gathers at the same time, it's a recording, but this private podcast that I share and I was thinking about everybody here, know, this kind of wider community and I thought, oh gosh, you know, this feeling of kindness, it feels so important and then I was also thinking about how I've been sharing a lot on boundaries recently.
Henny:Maybe you joined us on the Finding Flow event this week on navigating boundaries, Christmas rather, or navigating the holiday season using boundaries. And I also led an event for the Mpowder community as well, the amazing menopause community founded by Rebecca Brown. And that was also around, you know, this theme of boundaries. It's like I really trust when something is feeling very strong that there's a reason why it's resonating and you know we've had hundreds of people sign up across the different events that I've been running. I also ran a short series on Insight Timer on boundaries, yes these seem to be very present and you know they're so it's such a kind of so obvious really that they feel so present at this time of year because so many of us are facing into social situations, family dynamics, maybe work dues, maybe bigger gatherings than we might usually attend and you know throughout the kind of holiday or Christmas season, depending upon how you spend your time over these next couple of weeks, there can be a lot of joy, a deep sense of connection with others and of course there can be a great deal of complexity, maybe also a sadness as we feel into the loss of people that we love.
Henny:There's a sense of living grief, maybe a sense of estrangement within friendship group or family group or simply loved ones that can't be near you for whatever reason. And so these two themes of boundaries and kindness, they feel really interwoven for me and I suppose I just felt drawn to come and share that rather than talk really deeply about either of them, but simply to name them, know, simply to name that it's okay to have boundaries around what feels okay, what doesn't feel okay for you and to hold those boundaries, to honor those boundaries with kindness and one of the things I've been sharing across all these different events I've been running has been that you know part of this practice of naming and holding our boundaries is a sense of clarity and confidence actually, calm confidence, that actually makes us much easier to be with. When people are boundaried, holding barriers, not in a defensive posture, but when people you know are boundaried, it's often a lot easier to be with that person because we're not second guessing, we're not trying to read their mind, you know, we understand what it is that feels okay and what doesn't feel okay for them.
Henny:And equally, you know, sort of part of this process is for us to understand our own needs better. You know, often we might feel a sense of tension or resentment or irritation, anger even, because a boundary that we hadn't paid attention to is in some way not being honoured. And the first step of that is actually to honor our own recognition of that boundary and then to explore, well, how can I establish it? How can I establish this need? How can I express this with others if that's what's needed?
Henny:And then the third sort of really kind of key point that I feel is important here is also about honoring other people's boundaries with kindness, you know. We can create this virtuous circle of deep respect and attention to our own needs and to others' needs. Actually there's something incredibly beautiful about that, this honouring of each other, almost like creating a contract, maybe an unspoken contract, but a contract of awareness and kindness. So yeah, that just felt very present for me and I realise I've kind of dived into it, and you know the intention today wasn't really to speak for too long, so you know maybe that's enough, maybe just this little dip in to reconnecting with each other and hopefully there's something there that's been of use for you, maybe it sparks a thought of like, oh yeah, hang on a minute, there's a boundary that I haven't been expressing or that I haven't been holding, that I haven't been paying attention to perhaps or a sense of like maybe I haven't been noticing someone else's boundary, maybe I've been kind of clambering over it or clambering through it and perhaps could pay more attention to it myself.
Henny:And in the Insight Timer sessions that I've been doing, somebody shared a Brene Brown quote which I think just really sums this whole thing up and in classic Brenna style it's neat and the phrase is 'clear is kind' And I hadn't really thought about this when I first started speaking with you, but of course that really sums up this whole, that this sort of the symbiosis, this interrelational dynamic between this concept of having boundaries and kindness. When we are clear with ourselves, with others, that actually is an expression of kindness and it also cuts through that oh so human' you know, situation that we can sometimes find ourselves in where we perhaps notice a sort of passivity or even that kind of like passive aggressive stance of, you know, that there's a kind of defensive posture. Often it's unconscious, we might just sort of suddenly kind of find ourselves sounding that way and not intending to, or we might receive it from others and maybe they don't really intend it either. So I really love this concept of clear is kind and maybe that's something that we can all take forward into whatever this holiday season holds for each of us.
Henny:So I just want to send love and I wish you everything that is beautiful in the world. I wish you a peaceful time ahead and I will be back here. I have some beautiful plans for 2026, the year of the fire horse and I'm really looking forward to sharing them with you. Yeah, that feels very exciting in a sort of calm and very measured way. So I'm sending you so much love and a hug and a wave.