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Oren becomes an invisible frog with satchel charges strapped to his back, hopping under every bridge in a Children of the Blaze camp while the rest of the party sings a swamp cover of Snake Eater. Baldrick holds the detonator. Ash-weeping gnolls patrol above. It is, objectively, the most functional plan of the season.
Website: https://www.narrativedeclaration.com
System: Pathfinder Second Edition
Creators and Guests
Host
Host
Guest
Guest
Guest
What is Rotgrind - Narrative Declaration?
Five adventurers try to survive in this comedy filled Pathfinder Second Edition TTRPG campaign within the grim dark world of Tyne. Follow the show, get custom TTRPG content, and more at https://narrativedeclaration.com
All righty everyone, are you excited for another exciting episode of Rock Rind?
Welcome back everyone, sorry we had a missing episode because Thurse's dick was bleeding.
Anyway, I'm so glad everyone's-
All right, all right, roll it back, roll it back.
Thank you.
I like someone giving me 500 bits of that exact statement.
Good timing, Chad.
I think we've all learned a valuable lesson.
Do not tell Zoran any of your important medical decisions.
He cannot be trusted with medical confidentiality.
All right, Chad, I got good news.
Thurston had a kidney stone, now it's gone.
That's the joke.
We're moving on.
Hooray.
Yay.
But of course, our amazing interpersonal-
He's not right.
He's not right.
Okay.
As I clench everyone's interpersonal information and spread it across the internet, we'll go
down the line of the victims, starting off with Odo Roshi.
Hello, it's me, Odo.
Um, I am very excited for more of Zoran's HIPAA violations today.
I'm playing-
I write that down.
I write that down.
Write that down.
Write that down.
I am playing Vali, the sylph swashbuckler.
I'm blue dubbidi dubbidi and I'm ready to explode.
Is it swash or swash?
More like slosh to buckler.
Swash.
You gotta put the emphasis on the W.
Fucking got it.
Because that's where you get the panache.
The panache.
The panache.
The ever towering.
The ever floral.
The panache.
Hulkie Crow.
That's me, I'm Hulkie Crow, working overtime to cover Zoran's ass for all these fucking HIPAA
violations.
And today, I will be playing the Kanrasu Cleric Rahua, as I always do.
Of course, the one who's gonna have the element for all of our Game Master's needs is Arendelle.
Hi, I'm playing as Baldrick.
He's a human alchemist.
I'm here today.
We've been here two weeks from now.
But now we're here.
We're back.
How's it going?
Yeah.
Next guy.
Go.
We're back.
This is the ever magical, the ever swashbuckling speaker.
Hello.
I'm Speaker D.
I revolutionize so you don't have to.
Have you ever wanted to play a level seven Magus in a Pathfinder game?
Well, I know what it's like because I play Tanhauser, the Android Magus.
And the Nostalgia Critic bit is losing steam.
A bad credit card.
All right.
Next.
And of course, we have our illustrious, illustrious gonna fucking get me back game master, Thurston
Hillman.
I quit.
Hello, everybody.
It's good to be back.
Thanks for all the well wishes for people who heard about my, my, uh, my weak.
Fuck you, Sarge.
You know, I'm just playing a goddamn game.
We're off to a bad start.
Man, this is where we get TPK'd.
And I think we'd have earned it.
I haven't done shit.
What are you talking about?
You put the stones there.
Of course, I am the reason for everyone's downfall.
I am your host.
I am the host and the one playing the strict steward, Oren, who has constant PTSD simulators
going.
Yep.
As one does.
Very good.
Of course, it's been a while.
What adventure do you have for us today?
Well, um, previously on Rotgrind, I don't know.
Then we like cut to like Tanhauser and Baldrick in the swamp, like there's a bomb.
We have to set up the bomb.
Okay.
So basically Thurston, do you want to, do you want to leave it to a player to perhaps
do it in exchange for a hero quest point?
Oh, oh, it's almost like for this session.
People really want this hero quest points.
I would absolutely.
I am.
No, no, no.
I'm not doing it.
I want to sit back and relax.
Someone else.
Oh, okay.
As I look and see.
Well, you're the only one without a hero point.
Yeah.
I don't need it.
I spent it already.
I can't do it because I, I've edited all the stuff.
So I'm cheating.
I can fucking try.
If I fail, I don't get a hero point.
I don't know.
No.
I love, I love her until it's like, okay, we can get a hero point.
You know, so much of this recap.
Everyone's like, I don't fucking know what happened last time.
Shit.
I recall what happened.
My detail.
It might be a bit fuzzy.
Might need something to jog my memory.
A hero point.
Yeah.
I spent a hero point of mine to make me give you the recap.
Just going.
I just want to go back and forth.
Like that bit from Naked Gun.
Here's a 20 for you.
I hate this.
We're not getting it.
We're getting nowhere.
Slowly.
Grind away.
If I recall last session, the party was still within the Kaibu.
We had a wonderful father-son bonding moment between Orrin and Tannhauser in which Tannhauser used his revolutionary persuasion skills to acquire and test out a bow.
Cristened Taxes, I believe.
I'm not sure that was Orrin or Tannhauser who named that.
Who do you think?
Who do you fucking think?
Mysterious.
Who would name a bow Taxes?
Who would possibly do this?
I also like that for that thing though, real quick, that that whole thing was literally Orrin wanted a bow and then Tannhauser was the only one who used it.
I went to that whole bit and was like, oh yeah, here's your bow.
Okay, bye.
The funniest part about that to me is that I had a whole lamentation about Taxes or, you know, and everything.
And then he goes, it's called Taxes.
And just out of character, I'm sitting there as if I'm holding a bow going, all right, asshole.
All right, fuck you then.
After the shenanigans at the Kaibu, the party eventually set out down the road to locate the missing caravan.
Upon coming across the ruins of a burned out camp, came across one Dudriller guilt grip, barely clinging to life, but seeming to be the only one remaining of the B-Team party.
Other members scattered and missing.
Upon recollecting the events as best he could, the party continued onwards.
Eventually, after questioning Dudriller upon his dubious circumstances of why he's there and, well, his existence in general, they parted ways and headed towards the encampment scene two episodes prior with the B-Team.
Coming across a number of presumed children of the Blaze congregants set up around a camp, was beginning an ambush of this motley crew before them.
Going so far as to, really, I guess, commit domestic terrorism as par for the course of the party, with frogs and satchel charges all around the camp.
Finally.
But all is not indeed well in the swamps, and it's anyone's guess as to if this will actually play out.
Yay!
Yay!
Yay!
That's been critical.
Well, I don't believe you did.
Objectively, you did.
I mean, like, mostly just, you know, we ended with, yeah, the frog bomb plan.
Objectively, the funniest thing we could do.
Yeah, objectively.
Um, and then it turned out Pictor and Squelchfoot could cast invisibility, uh, which Pictor did cast invisibility on Oren, giving, uh, Oren, frog Oren with coring charges, um, a good, a good situation.
To sort of recap where we're at, um, you all are sort of surrounding this encampment to the northeast, there's sort of deep, deep water, which are kind of like circling through around towards this one shack that's on top of the shattered stonework here.
Uh, elements of the children of the blaze are maneuvering around.
There's various agents and what you assume are spell casters that have the air crackling around them.
And then even some gnolls, uh, pair of gnolls that have, uh, also wandered around with their eyes, you know, weeping out ash.
Uh, and as we left, uh, yeah, Oren, you are sort of, um, deep, deep, uh, or remaining behind where your group had met up, uh, to plan and strategize.
And we're going to go out and begin planting coring bombs with the rest of your allies that slowly moved up in a group.
Um, we're gonna get this started, um, I suspect, uh, with Oren, um, you have your coring charges on you.
What, what are you going to do, invisible and as a frog?
Explode!
I'm gonna spend an airs declaration for the rest of the party to sing frog eater for me.
Cadence of snake eater.
This is not a birthday party.
Yes.
Yeah.
Not.
Follow what a tree.
Don't.
As I'm slipping, slorping about, just...
Whoever sings it, whoever sings it, I'll give a hero point to. I'm just saying.
I hate this family.
Some days, you blow up a tree frog.
I've fallen in the cell.
The way, you see new land.
Alright, that's all you're getting.
I play my grind.
Hey, Peter!
Hulkie, I'm really impressed by your falsetto.
I gotta give you a, gotta give you a round of applause for that one.
Oh, thank you.
Okay, is he gonna blow up?
Where's my hero point?
He's like, where's my shit?
Just...
Alright, Thurston.
I have...
Blow up Zoran now, please.
Thank you.
Well, okay.
So, Oren, what are you doing, invisible frog man?
I am, uh...
I actually happen to look up the stats of frug.
See if it gives me anything.
Here, chat, you can look with me.
Just remember the notes that you are currently in the form of a groggin frog,
which is a frog that has ingested steroids its whole life.
And as a note that I have from our last session, which you yourself established as lore...
Thank God you remember.
I forgot all about the frog.
They have, uh...
Well, you're gonna regret this, cause you're really good at tonguing.
That was something you said you did in our last session.
Oh, hell yeah!
Let's see.
I get no bonuses to, uh, Thal, so this would suck.
Oh, but you're invisible.
Yeah, for now.
Just, Thurndale, just, uh-huh.
Uh, I'm wishing, I'm wishing the, the Stal.
I think we agreed on pretty much the left to right bridges.
So I need to get over this bridge all the way far off, which...
Okay.
Uh, I would like to begin by diving under the water as much as I can.
And I'm just kind of like humming to myself slightly just...
Frog eater!
I'm just like...
Just going through.
We, we, we suggested this and that bridge.
Uh, the very top, very top right?
This one and then the, this one up here.
Yeah, because...
Okay, okay.
It doesn't matter if we bust this one.
Okay.
Yeah, it doesn't matter if we break this one.
We just need to stop them from grouping up over here.
How would you like me to proceed?
Thirsty, you want me to just do three action bits and then roll stuff first and then that?
Yeah, let's, let's...
Yeah, so you know what?
I think, I think to, to keep all of our respective, um, sanities here.
Um, I think what we should do...
You're playing a rock, right?
I'm just gonna...
Yeah, I know.
All of our respective sanities.
I am going to get everyone here, um, to...
For purposes of this, you know, some of you are, I think, mostly stealthing.
But, you know, those of you who aren't necessarily good at stealth might use perception.
I think I'm gonna get you to roll some initiative here.
And we'll do this in, in combat tactical time, just because it'll be pretty important.
Yeah, I'll write a guess.
Mm-hmm.
Stealth...
Just tell me whenever you're ready.
Yeah, you can all, you can all go in.
Just remember to roll it as initiative.
I'll get everyone to do it at the same time.
And then also at the same time, I'm gonna roll just like a...
Would my, uh...
Metric pile of dice.
Would my, uh...
Uh, stealth initiative, yeah?
Uh, initi- yeah, stealth initiative or perception, whatever you wanna use.
Would my incredible initiative, uh, feat be applied here or no?
Natural 20.
Uh, let me take a look at the wording of your cool feat, sir, and then I will let you know, I'm fairly sure.
I mean, it gives me a plus 5.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely you do.
Yeah, absolutely, this will apply.
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
I roll...
26.
26.
Okay.
Oh, well, will my feather step help me at all here?
I can step into difficult terrain and if I...
That...
That will be very important here, yes.
Based.
Yes.
Okay.
Um...
All right, so I'm going to, uh, start the encounter, uh, I'm going to start the encounter and assume everyone's just delaying until Oren goes.
Correct.
Correct.
All right, which is really good because, like, Oren's like...
Yeah, I'm forever away.
Second last.
All right, Oren.
Here you go.
This, uh...
Put everyone's icon here.
Just...
I take over the...
All right.
Yay.
I'm going to move, uh...
All three of my moves.
I'm going to slosh over behind this rock here.
Okay.
Actually, what I'll do...
Just to keep everything ultra-style.
I see there's some lily pads here.
You can tell to tell, I'm going to use her map assets.
She put a little lily pad.
Look at...
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
You can tell to tell.
I'm going to use her map assets.
She put a little lily pad.
Look at...
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm going to...
I'm going to go...
Right there.
And I would like to use the action hide.
Technically already hidden because of stealth.
I don't think that affected me.
Okay.
You wanna go there and then make a stealthy stealth?
yeah pretty much held up behind cover
if the creature could see you
I'm already hidden
I'm good
okay
I'm gonna go here
and keep an eye out as much as I'm gonna rush
up there and make it quick
gotta make sure the mission doesn't get jeopardized
can I see
the party and can they see my little frog eye
well you're invisible
right now
my bit is gone
wow no bit
time to play the game kills you
so like you turn around
and you're like why aren't they reacting to me
oh I must be so stealthy
fuck anything
snurchous mission
alright so I've heard
just go up there all three of my actions that'll be the
okay and then everyone
will delay again
not me
oh okay okay fine then we will
we will continue on
Tannhauser
here you go
move up a little bit
and this water here
this would be difficult terrain right
yeah basically anything once you get outside of like
this foresty area is gonna be difficult
okay
I'm going to look at Vali
now Vali
this mission is all for your benefit
and so to that end
I'm going to make sure that when the time comes
you will absolutely be able to make it to your destination
uh I'm going to lay my hand on her shoulder
actualize my internal quantum energies
and cast freedom of movement
on Vali
for the next 10 minutes
uh Vali uh cannot be uh immobilized
grabbed or restrained
and ignores all effects
that would give circumstantial penalties
to their speed
oh
nice
your nanomachines feel really funny
thanks Tanny
you're welcome
you are currently dancing between 12 realities at once
no force can hold you
but you can't walk through walls for some reason also
oh well damn it
uh never mind
I take it back
since I can't walk through walls
this sucks
you know
if we weren't being stealthy
I might be yelling right now
but the mission takes priority
gotcha
that's my action
uh
okay
as a free thing
can I speak to Vali?
yeah
uh
so yeah
you can
look like you can morally get across this smuck now right?
yep
so
once we actually blow these things
we're probably going to want to check out
what's in that damn building
because if it's more of them
it'd be good to at least know that
and maybe you could deal with them or something
to that end
right
well
if there are only
I don't know
I could take 20 guys
I'll let you know
in a fight right?
yeah
Rahua
beats the fuck out of here
I'm going to fucking kill you
you have to be on shit
fuck
I'm quoting Twitter
you don't
are you?
don't
god damn it
anyway I'm going to use my free action to drown Baldrick
oh okay
I resist using my
my shoes
Rahua save me
are you doing anything?
uh no
Rahua's not going to fucking do anything
Rahua's going to move further down the swamp
why are we like this?
why are you people doing this?
we're fucking
we're trying to kill them right now
what is this change of heart?
fuck you
I'm leaving
no he's gone
have fun
have fun getting healed
asshole
wait wait
Rahua
it was just a bit
Rahua
the dice landed right on Rahua
very epic
crushing him
Baldrick
what did I miss?
oh don't worry Chad
nothing
Baldrick
you're up
yeah
am I?
are you going to do anything?
I'm assuming
I have the detonator
for these funny things
that we've hooked up with
copper wire
prestidigitation
to do existence
out of
I believe your plan
was to have
um
was to
was to have
Tanhauser
cast electric arc
on the wire
okay
so I need to be
probably need to be
next to him
for that
since everyone
moved
so move
uh
I'm also gonna
probably
well
if Vali's actually
going over to the island
with that speed boost
that she has now
or the ability
to actually move
through water
uh
can I pass
Vali and Alchemist's fire
so she can set the building
on fire
if it's all the bad guys
yeah
okay I'd do that
I'm gonna remove
one from my inventory now
okay one sec
I'll just drag it over
to her
what kind of
Alchemist's fire
you have a bomb now
yes
I have five now
I will
I will add this
to Vali's inventory
yeah
a moderate
I'm assuming
yeah it's a moderate
no Thurston
a lesser
look
look
I
you know
you just might not
trust her
without chemicals
and be like
here
have this one
yes Thurston
I want my teammates
to do as little
damage as possible
good
all right
you passed
I already
bundled the
coring charges
together
so I'm out
of them now
so we're done
with that
okay
cool
Vali now has
a bomb
yeah just
when you get up
there
you can look
in the building
or whatever
the hell
while everyone's
distracted
see if anyone
useful is inside
and if it's full
of bastards
well
you know
Vali
gotcha
all right
well
now that I've
been super buffed
I'm gonna do
my damnedest
to go ahead
and start
sloshing
through the muck
while Oren
is setting
shit up
sure
and so
with freedom
of movement
do I just
move as normal
through difficult
terrain
yeah
you're not
impeded by it
at all
hell yeah
probably for the
duration of the
fight
without panache
that is
35 feet
um
I don't suppose
I could do
a quick backflip
as a reaction
I mean you
could
um
no
make it to the
tree and hide
yeah
I'm gonna
kind of
try to
circle around
kind of
this away
because there
is a door
back there
yeah
uh
so 35 feet
would take me
here
yeah
um
that's my
first action
my second
action
uh
now is when
I need to be
really stealthy
uh would I
take a movement
penalty for
stealthiness
uh okay
so in this
case what
you're what
you're looking
to do is
like
move like
moving well
while stealthing
essentially um
so that would
be this sneak
action which
is you
stride up to
half your
speed
um and if
you're like
undetected uh
by a creature
and it's
impossible for
that creature
to observe
um so
essentially you
can like you
can do that
now how that
works is at
the end of
your movement
I would roll
a secret check
I'm gonna just
let you roll
it but generally
the GM would
roll it secretly
and be like
compare it to
like the
perception DC
of a creature
so basically
you're gonna
roll a like
a stealthy
check at
moving half
speed and
then you'll
compare it to
like the
perception DC
of like the
creatures nearby
probably just
this person
up up here
gotcha
all right
uh let's
roll them
bones
not the worst
that's a 24
okay
um
so one of
the cool
things
technically
here
um
you're
you're in
this like
water
which does
give you
you know
like a
modicum
of cover
so it
actually like
it actually
makes you
even more
stealthy
so it's
I'm gonna
give you a
plus two
circumstance
bonus on
that which
is still
like
um
enough
for a
very very
solid
success
it's
cause I'm
blue
yeah
um
so you're
undetected
and you
remain
undetected
so you
can keep
like yeah
you can
keep
basically
you could
move
half your
speed
so you
can move
like another
35 feet
and remain
hidden
okay
uh
indeed
I believe
that is
what I
will do
okay
uh
one thing
to note
and I'll
just kind
of
mark it
out on
the map
here
cause it
is
a bit
important
um
if you
notice
like
kind of
this
divider
here
that's
where it
starts
going
into
like
deep
water
oh
okay
yeah
so just
just keep
that in
mind
when you're
moving
about
do you
want to
go for
a swim
a swim
oh I'll
swim
uh
I'm gonna
get up
here with
the rest
of my
movement
yeah sure
so you
continue
kind of
keeping
yourself
right to
the side
of sort
of the
deeper
water
this large
rock
that's
coming
out of
it
and then
using
one of
the
sort
of
decayed
trees
here
that's
standing
a smaller
one
to give
yourself
some
cover
all right
perfecto
from
volley
okay
very good
very good
very good
and my
turn
and my
turn
in defense mode
pick turn
squelch
foots go
picture
picture
and screams
loudly
ruining our
stealth
everything
just the
whole
there's
playing
this whole
thing
okay we
inspire
no
picture
picture
sort of
like looks
you know
back and
forth eagerly
from
tannhauser
to baldric
just like
nodding
like
yeah
yeah we
got this
right
got this
yes
friggin
hope so
got it
okay
okay
okay
and that's
his action
he just
is like
psyching
himself up
uh
frog eater
orin
please
your go
so
so you
know
volley
you
well
you
wouldn't
have
actually
seen
because
volley
is so
stealthy
but like
you
you
psychically
know
that
volley
and your
allies
are starting
to make
their moves
thurston
i want to
say this
real quick
i think
it's immensely
funny that
we just
have
tannhauser
literally
pointing his
finger
with like
little bits
of electricity
coming off
of it
baldric
is holding
two wires
together
like inches
like an inch
apart from
each other
and pick
turn is like
right next to
the two of
them just
going
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
he just
wants to
contribute
he's just
glad to
be here
yeah
invisifrog
um as
you're
as you
you go
you're kind
of up
against this
like stone
section
it doesn't
rise out
a lot
so
you see
one of
the gnolls
that's um
standing
you know
on the
more solid
rock
sort of
pacing
about
as you
get
closer
to this
hyena
faced
creature
uh
you can
tell
that
they're
looking
around
even
though
their
eyes
seem
to be
you know
seem
to be
like
weeping
out
embers
or ashes
uh
and you
know
otherwise
are
somewhat
like
milky
you know
what are
you doing
well
knowing
that uh
with
with
Oren's
experience
out of
nature
characters
that
that
gnoll
probably has
a scent
section
uh
but probably
be mixed
in with
all the
swamp
going
on
really
smell
me
if
I
get
too
on
this
going
on
pretty
confident
I can
get up
to this
bridge
still
uh
as I'm
here
I can
I can
kind
of
as you
said
I can
kind
of
see
him
a
little
they
seem
to be
looking
up
to
the
north
or
the
south
they
seem
to
be
uh
kind
of
like
cone
wise
looking
south
so
you
know
like
if I
had
to
give
them
a
like
vision
type
thing
it
would
kind
of
be
like
that
like
kind
of
that
direction
okay
so
it's
or
or
kind
of
come
up
to
the
bridge
so
do
you
want
me
to be
like
on top
of
the
bridge
to
the
side
on
the
grid
your
choice
where
you
want
would
you
this
is
up
to
you
you
tell
me
I'm
asking
you
by
your
definition
is
near
the
bridge
I
mean
like
adjacent
to
it's
fine
okay
so
one
action
going
rib
rib
rib
rib
rib
rib
rib
and then
he gets
up
and for
the last
of my
actions
I like
to
set
the
coring
charge
on
yeah
absolutely
all
right
I got
one down
and I
kind of
thumbs up
for approval
but realize
I'm
visible
again
and go
oh
oh
oh
how many
actions
was it
to set
the
charge
two
it's
it's
two
actions
to set
them
that'll
be the
end
of my
turn
okay
um
sec
oh
jackie do
me a huge
favor
could you
make
nothing
but
frog
and
puns
by your
time
just
just like
just that
entirely
please
please
we need
this
posting
jabroni
mike
slam hog
in the
chat
hmm
concerns
I have
them
um
one sec
I'm
I'm
going to
find
something
here
because
I
think
it
is
important
uh
to
place
down
I
need
a
thing
but
in
the
meantime
as
uh
with
that
done
Oren
we
cut
to
Tanhauser
you're
you're
back
up
indeed
uh
I
am
going
to
cast
another
spell
okay
uh
but
first
I'm
going
to
activate
laughing
shadow
just
because
I
expect
combat
for
the
duration
is up
um
okay
so that
has to
let me
double check
that
when does
laughing
shadow
expire
is it
a minute
or ten
uh
let me
let me
pull it
up
here
so you
have to
be in
arcade
cascade
so
you're
most recent
so you'd
have to
cast a
spell
first
I
did
cast
a
spell
that's
right
you did
oh
yeah
okay
haha
you did
with
freedom
yeah
um
so you cast
spell
um
and yeah
that
so you're
you're
you just
get that
as part
of your
like
arcane
cascade
um
and I
think that
just
sticks
on you
yeah
oh okay
cool
well in
that case
um
yeah
it's a
stance
so it's
just like
it's
sticking
on you
for right
now
well
knowing
that
we're
about
to fight
the
children
of the
please
and that
they're
quite fond
of fire
I'm going
to cast
resist
energy
on myself
um
and I'm
going to
of course
choose fire
damage
and gain
resistance
five
against
fire
damage
cool
nice
and uh
that's
the end
of my
buffing
kick
yeah
rahua
the boy
i
i am
going
to
cast
vital
beacon
actually
azra
who
is
like
jassy
you want
to call
that
splays
apart
inky
black
star
stuff
seeps
out
into
the
surrounding
area
before
dissipating
a short
distance
from him
uh
if you
do need
to get
healed
at all
all you
have to
do
is
just
reach
up
and
give
your
old
friend
a
hand
he's
actually
gonna
move
up
a
lot
closer
to
vali
because
he doesn't
want her
to
fucking
die
well
it's
happened
before
we're
gonna
try
and
prevent
it
from
happening
again
i'm
gonna
pocket
medic
you
yay
if
anybody
see
coming
in
you
can
actually
just
recreate
the
return
to
slab
bit
anyway
just
imagine
this
dark
swamp
or
who
are
coming
in
alien
looking
creature
he
could
just
look
like
a
tree
he's
just
a
tree
i'm
i'm
just
a
little
guy
he's
a
tree
what
is
this
alien
thing
i mean
it's
a
walking
tree
yeah
but
it's
not
a
walking
tree
if
you
stand
still
what
is
this
ridley
scott's
alien
looking
thing
so
zorden
goes
into
a
forest
and
just
starts
screaming
don't
you
it's
true
yeah
you
do
anything
nils
hulkster
uh
no
i'm
just
using
as many
actions
as i
can
to start
moving
towards
valley
remember
the water
is difficult
terrain
so it's
half
movement
that's
okay
okay
um
and then
baldric
uh
baldric
is
i have
nothing
left to
do
i've
checked
my
feats
i've
done
everything
that i
really
can
i looked
at the
actions
i can
take
uh
baldric
is
literally
just
standing
there
tapping
the two
wires
together
knowing
that they
are not
charged
yet
so it's
just
kind
of
like
you
know
just
i'm
waiting
he's
he's
waiting
oh
don't
worry
picturn
is
looking
at
you
and
just
nodding
just
good
um
all right
new round
i guess
well it's
off to
volley now
all right
well
um
getting a good
look at this
building
um
from this
distance
can i see
if there
are any
windows
or anything
that i can
peer inside
so as you
approach you
can see that
there's two
sconces that
are um
outside of
the building
um
it looks
like it's
made of
some kind
of like
alchemically
lacquered
wood
uh
there are
no windows
to speak
of
there are
simply
two doors
that have
been set
up on
this thing
uh
one to
the sort
of
southeast
and then
one to
the northeast
it's kind
of this
like weird
angled
l-shape
building
yes
how shitty
does the
shotgun shack
look
it's
look
don't judge
the shotgun
shack
i'm asking
i'm asking
how
are there
like any
big gaps
in it
i'm approaching
the killer
shack
uh
no
no
no
the
the
shack
actually
looks you
know
like fairly
sturdy
of all the
like wooden
things here
it looks like
this is the
one that has
had the most
effort put into
it
what the fuck
why
whatever
all right
i'm not a
bandit
in which case
i'm going to
use my
movement
to get
well i guess
i'd have to
use my first
two actions
to get
kind of
right up
next to
the door
um
kind of
pressing
myself
over
here
and i'm
going to
lean against
it
and just
listen
inside
uh
give me a
perception check
give me a
perception check
kind of keeping
an eye out
on everyone
as well
for my sign
to burst
in
uh
perception
there she
is
oh boy
oh do i
hear a point
that
oh i've got
two
thank you chat
i'm gonna
i'm gonna
re-roll that
please
you got a
two
she got a
two chat
so that's
only a
yeah yeah
all right
i'm gonna
i'm gonna
re-roll that
shit
oh i saw
the one and
i almost
shat my
pants
well it's
slightly better
so it's
at least
above a
you all
you hear
is like
just just
coming slightly
through the
wood
some
frenchman
laughing
do i
recognize
this
french
lilt
you do
how could
you forget
how could
you forget
the person
who led
to your
first death
you
son of
a bitch
i've got
a i've got
a hand
on the
door
the
doorknob
can i
tell
with an
probably
not
but do
i have
a rough
estimate
of how
many
people
are
inside
no
no
you don't
perception
check
yeah
right
okay
well as
you
mutter
under
your
breath
to
yourself
you
do
not
have
a
good
idea
just
the
just
the
all
right
i am
readying
my gun
i'm
readying
my rapier
i'm
i'm
readying
my
my
my
fucking
ak
anything
to take
this
man
down
yeah
i've got
a rocket
launcher
for you
all right
okay
that'll have
to be my
turn
i'm what
i'm having to
wonder if that
perception check
you just made
thurston was for
initiative or
because you're
having him
listen
who knows
it's interesting
i hate it when
the game master
doesn't tell me
what he's doing
i hate when the
game master does
things we should
do it
yeah
work with the
game master
own game
anyway
oh wait
before we move
on thurston
i have a question
okay
okay
i apologize
rewind time
there's a bunch
of i mean just
for the sake of
uh holding actions
and stuff
there's a bunch
of fire around
here right
this is the
children of the
blaze that's a
pretty strong
assumption right
yeah yeah
yeah
uh
bull would you
say my canister
of very flammable
alcohol is
give me a will
save
a will save
yeah
i i don't know
why that would
particularly
oh wait
i understand
for flammable
alcohol you have
an alchemist
fire
that is true
oh that's a
three
i i definitely
drank this all
at camp last
night
it's very
empty
voli's just
like oh god
damn it
not again
i'll have to
use the fire
bomb
i'll have to
use the
alchemist
fire
no but that's
the thing
i could throw
alcohol on him
and then throw
fire at him
i could blood
board his ass
you know
when you throw
the oil pot
and then you
get the fire
fire
i don't know
i don't know
about that
one
anyway thank you
thirst
and i'm moving
on
yeah yeah we
got this yeah
this is gonna be
great
this is teamwork
yeah
uh that's
picture in
section
uh orin you're
up
great
finishing that
one orin will
over to
next one
we'll take
you say it
takes two
actions but
it'll take me
uh two to
get over there
uh unless
hold up
how far is
that
they'll get
me up to
that and i
can't do
anything else
that
well yeah
yeah so
hmm
well okay
okay okay
you could
move there
i'm not good
on top of
that
okay
okay
thirst
and i want
to ask
since he
is
one action
away and
he's not
really planning
on moving
anywhere could
you have him
start doing
that and just
not be able to
do anything
until he finishes
the action
yeah like he
could he could
essentially start
the process i'd
allow you to
split it up so
you could use
that one action
to like pull
it out and
start start
setting the
charge i'm
planting the
bomb i'll do
that the bomb
is being
planted planting
the bomb
uh sir
the bomb
when
where's the
bomb where's
the bomb
where's the
bomb where's
the bomb
that's not
good
and hauser
you're up
doorstock
ten hauser
mania
bro
um
i'm wondering
if it's wise
for me to
cast a haste
while we're
waiting for
the bombs
to finish
being set
up
i'm going to be
casting it on
you i presume
right
yeah me
me
it's all
about me
all i need
is the
duration of
one minute
yeah well
how many rounds
would that be
like 10
that wouldn't
be bad
no no that's
yeah it's not
horrible
yeah yeah we're
we're not gonna be
uh yeah it's not
gonna take 10
we're not gonna make
it
no
we're not gonna
make it
we're all gonna
die
yeah go ahead
and cast it on
yourself because
i all i need to
do is cast
shocking grasp on
this one it comes
time to blow it
up so yeah i was
gonna just use
uh electric arc
whatever works
yeah something
electrical all
right cool i'll
cast haste upon
myself and uh
just continue
waiting okay
all right
by the way for
your laughing shadow
thing you can
actually put that
on your token
and apply the
resistance
oh no way
really yeah
a lot of that
yeah a lot of
that stuff
just double check
if you can't
can't then
i'll give it a
shot
yeah probably
can i assume
yeah um
okay
rahua
you're up
who is going to
continue moving
up because
i guess i'm
going to stride
and try
sorry
i'm going to
spend all of
my actions to
get as close
to volley as
oh boy
is sulky
cutting out
for people
am i cutting
out
i'm a little
quiet that's a
little unfortunate
i'm going to
spend all my
actions to get
as close to
volley as i
can
difficult terrain
that's half
don't forget
you gotta be
stealthy jimbo
okay
that would
that would
half your
that would
half your
movement again
so to stealth
you're only
moving a
quarter movement
through this
stuff
oh my god
you go there
maybe this is
not the best
course of
action
perhaps not
perhaps volley
is going to
die again
well if volley
gets in trouble
she could just
run back
because like
she's not
impeded by
the muck
yeah
does really
would just
like take a
step out
go oh
yeah this
is a bad
idea good
luck volley
bye
all you have
to do is
kind of
all you have
to do is
kind of meet
her halfway
so that way
you're not
so far away
is going to
be very
difficult to
do
you just need
to make sure
she doesn't
have to try
to run
105 feet
to get to
you
honestly
since i can
move 35
feet per
move
i move
uh
uh
this
i can move
pretty much
that in a
turn
i'm going off
the assumption
that you are
spending an
action to
open the
door and
then someone
proceeds to
hit you with
an alpha
strike and
then it's
like all
right you
need to
run
that's
fair
we'll just
uh
we'll do
exactly that
actually i'm
sorry i'm
going to
manifest my
soulforged
armaments
i might as
well get
that done
okay
so i'll
have those
up
all right
and
i'm gonna
go back
on land
i'm just
gonna
i'm gonna
stay here
hello i'm
back
hello again
yeah so
that's that
that's a lot
of mug
out there
i don't
i don't
really move
that well
through
through swamp
water
that deep
and also
being stealthy
so i mean
if she dies
she dies
you know
the risks
look
you are
what passes
for a medical
professional
among us
we do not
need you
saying that
sort of
thing
that's right
the only
other person
here who's
got any
kind of
healing
is
oh
yeah in
my medical
professional
opinion
this was
a very
bad
move
look
she can
run if
she needs
to
just make
sure that
you make
enough of
a distraction
that she
doesn't get
shot at
oh i can
do that
i can do
that very
well
but uh
perhaps later
not right
now
i'm ending
my turn
now
baldrick
you're up
baldrick is
again kind
of just
nervously and
anxiously
tapping the
uh the
two copper
wires together
he's kind
of mulling
over the
last time
he had to
set up a
large explosive
setup like
this so it's
uh last time
he did this it
went perfectly
fine so you
know in theory
this should be
better except
this isn't a
swamp
yeah and
then of course
you have
picture and
helping you
be like yeah
yeah yeah
yeah that's
not helping
things
last time he
last time he
did last time
he did this he
was by himself
yeah yeah
get hype get
hype yeah
he didn't have
he didn't have
a little munchkin
next to him
like hyping him
up to set up
like a kaboom
yeah yeah
volley
all right
um so the
kaboom's about
to happen
uh am i
getting the
thumbs up from
the crew to
swing open the
door and see
what's going
on uh well
i mean
uh well
there's a
couple questions
i have here
for you
my friend
regarding this
situation
um first
of all
um you
know your
your main
group is
currently has
no illumination
where they
are
oh dear
um so it's
kind of difficult
to see them
as they're you
know shrouded
by tree cover
and whatnot
second of all
um i don't
know
i i believe
oran the frog
eater is being
fairly discreet
with the bomb
placement so i
don't think the
group really knows
what the signal
is yet for uh
all the bombs
are planted
the signal is
oran gets back
to us so i
don't blow him
up
all right so
in that case
should i pass
my turn and
just wait for
the boom or
do i swing in
now i mean
it's what what
what is volley
gonna do in
this situation
i thought we
planned this
we did the
plan was you
go up there
and wait for
the kaboom
you will wait
until the kaboom
that was what i
was clarifying
waiting for the
kaboom
i know i didn't
want to
thirst was making
it seem like we
can't discuss this
right now because
no no no no
you absolutely can
i'm just saying
like what is volley
going to do
yeah uh in that
case i am going
to continue
stealthing i'm
going to keep
listening at the
door and i'm
waiting for the
kaboom which
is my signal
you can't miss
that unless
you're deaf
exactly
i feel like
you're missing
out on prime
backflipping
time but
sure
yeah exactly
the stealthiest
thing to do
right now is
a backflip
you're right
stealth backflip
it's the most
responsible thing
to do at the
moment
exactly
you're gonna
have to do
that thing
that leon
does in the
remake where
the two
chainsaws are
coming directly
for his neck
so instead
of like just
backing away
from the wall
you'd like
run up and
do a backflip
exactly
exactly
yeah no i'm
gonna keep
listening in at
the door
um just
doing my
damnedest
uh i don't
know if that's
passing my turn
or if you would
like me to make
a roll
um you could
give me a
stealth check
all right
famous last words
that's a 20
okay i'm good
at stealth at
least
okay yeah
you you
continue to
to keep quiet
against the door
and waiting for
a signal from
your allies
yes indeed
yeah all right
we got this
we got this
y'all pick
cut to picture
yeah yeah
yeah i believe
yeah or in
the frog
if i've set
all the charges
i will
you've set
the second
one yep
wham on
back
do we land
on a third
one
rip it on
back
so you have
one action to
finish and then
two to shimmy
on back
yeah
heading over
all the way
to here
are you
wanting to get
further away
are you gonna
give the signal
or
i can't do
anything else
actions
i mean free
action to talk
or shout
or whatever
or you know
croak really
loud
you could
like yeah
like obviously
you could do
some kind
of thing
or
pretty much
is very
loud
see if anyone
picks up on
it or not
or it's like
do we have to
roll something
for that
i mean if
he's like
if he's being
obvious like
he could like
make some kind
of sound
again like
you planned
this
i know
i'm asking
you thurston
well yes
but what i mean
is is like
he could have
a signal
you could have
agreed on
like you
probably had
a signal
that was like
is
oh yeah
my signal
my idea
was to wait
until he was
in safety
before i blew
it up
because if he's
out in the
middle of the
open and we
blow it up
and ruin his
stealth then we
just leave
orrin in the
middle of the
crossfire
or remember
these these
charges aren't
like 30 foot
explosions right
like no i'm
referring i'm
referring to
them these
guys yes
but orrin the
frog is also
still invisible
because he
hasn't taken a
hostile action
yeah i guess we
could i guess we
could go with
that i'm cool
like you can
have him come
back i'm just
saying like you
know then he's
gonna have to
spend actions to
run back out there
it's also the
thought process of
like do we just
are we trying to
get rid of the
bridges or do we
during battle that
but activate it or
how to attract
people to do
damage the
objective of
destroying the
bridges was to
give them less
access to easy
ground okay
making them have
to make more
bad like maneuvers
through the muck
which would in
theory make them
more open for us
to pick off
in theory that
depends on exactly
what thurston has
up in store for
them because they
could all have
like fly for all
i know
we'll just have to
figure that out
when we get there
precisely do you
want to make the
loud ribbit
okie doke
who's up
okay um
let me
sorry
okay
tenhouser
you hear
big ribbit
all right
i think it's
time
it's time
that's correct
yeah
i'm
going to reach
down to the
wire
and i'm
going to cast
electric arc
baldrick passes
you the two
ends
my hands
glitter with
green electricity
and head straight
to the copper
wire
you just kind
of hear baldrick
mutter to
himself
kaboom
and with that
you
you
you
you
set it
off
uh
causing
causing
an immense
explosion
at both
of the
sites
kablambo
um
which causes
both of the
bridges
to
to erupt
in flame
as the
coring charges
go off
uh
and then i
don't know
i'll
let me
let me
do
i didn't
have any
sound effects
perhaps
wait i have
the sound
board
no
no
no
i have
the loud
fucking
explosion
you asked
for this
chat
hello
can anyone
hear me
i can't hear
anything
anymore
i got
chenita
hello
chenita
warriors
attack
all right
i'm getting rid
of your
soundboard
privileges
on this
server
no
i told you
not to
click it
i can be
trusted with
the secrets
of the universe
now i gotta go
in and
fucking edit
that shit
so it doesn't
blow people's
ears out
i'm never
gonna do it
again
all right
fantastic work
everyone
aldrick can you
give can you
roll me
4d8 please
all right
you got it
holy shit
uh how's a
okay so
the gnoll
closest takes
20 damage
because in
the prior
episode as
per my notes
your narrative
declaration was
to also have
the explosions
be very big
so they would
have a
solid effect
um so
the gnoll
takes that
much um
this feller
one up
here uh
no no i'll
use the same
one uh
take takes
20 damage
and then also
has to make
a reflex
save because
the rickety
tower he's
on probably
collapses
how to say
thurston i
don't mind
rolling another
one i'm okay
with that
uh you know
um i'm gonna
instead have
you roll me
a d8 because
this guy's gonna
fall off of like
his destroyed
tower and i need
to figure out
where he's gonna
fly to
all right he is
flying direction
one two three
four five
six oh
okay so
that's
yeah one
two three
four five
six seven
yeah roll
me a d6
three so
despite the
laws of physics
not really
working this
way he's
flung
backwards
um
as like
the explosion
like
of the
tower
yeah exactly
and it kind
of collapses
and he
struggles off
and falls
into into
the muck
there is a
shout
the tower
is gone
um along
with that the
force of the
explosion like
careens open
the door of
this place
um and uh
yeah so
that was uh
tannhauser that
was your two
actions you have
one action
remaining
uh i have
two actions
remaining
uh is
electric art
two actions
to cast
yeah yeah
oh that's right
you you're
hasted yeah
i'm gonna take
out my grappling
hook pointed at
this tree and
i'm gonna swing
to it like
spider-man
oh give me an
attack roll on
the tree please
you fucking
got it
boss
oh
please grappling
hook do your
job
yeah
holy
yeah
i did it
i did it
all right
all right
so yeah
attack on
tannhauser
yeah
um
i've given
i've given
uh tannhauser
panache
i don't know
how this will
break the game
but we'll find
out
all right
so you
you hit it
um
yeah okay
okay
so yeah
you can
look
okay
you rolled
a 20
i'm not
taking this
away from
you but
also i just
love
you know
you you can
fire it out
but to reload
it you have
to manually
like turn
the crane
for a minute
no
i'll give
you a fortune
no no no
thurston
here's how
that works
the net 20
means that
from the
implosion effect
of the explosive
after it has
exploded
it is now
being ripped
towards
yeah yeah
there you go
he's being pulled
in by the vacuum
yeah yeah
it's just like
do you say
anything as
you're flying
through the air
well quickened
and having
panache
yeah absolutely
i'm gonna land
onto the tree
stooped
ready for combat
then i'm going
to rise up
and i'm gonna
call out
children of the
blaze
prepare
the revolution
has come
to this
swamp
oh no
not this
fuck again
attack
uh and uh
can i
maybe uh
do some kind
of sick
ass uh
demoralizing
thing from that
uh i gave you
like 60 free
fucking like
if you want to
do it all
that'll be a
narrative
declaration
that's okay
that's okay
okay
and uh
with my final
action i will
uh heroically
uh shield
and that's it
it's heroically
shield
i will heroically
duck
uh well
um with
that
um
yeah uh
the first
of the like
blaze fellers
uh starts
to rush
um
coming down
to
just gonna like
run along
here
over to
i'll put on
a little more
basically there
um
yeah
and this like
this blaze
this member
of the blaze
comes running
he's holding
a hand
crossbow
uh tanhauser
has now loudly
proclaimed his
presence
um so obviously
i'm gonna shoot
him
um
as you do
as as i
absolutely do
uh so a
hand crossbow
shot
comes out
towards you
now i would
certainly argue
that i'm in
some kind of
cover
uh you
are but you
also have to
take the take
cover action
to benefit
from
oh do you
yeah
you have a lot
of bonuses
right now my
man
i and then i
have the wings
of an angel
and also a
demon and
like you know
mischief and
mayhem my two
excellent guns
one shoots fire
one shoots fire
yeah so so
you would get
like okay so
you do get a
bonus uh but
then like if
you take cover
you get like an
extreme bonus so
like in the tree
in the tree you
get but it's
fairly like it's
not like a
heavy cover
this tree
i'm not i'm
not not taking
much of a
conversation
yeah but i'm
missing anyway so
you're fine so
like a bolt goes
whizzing by you
as it is is
fired by this
and you hear
this we're
under attack
from the
from the east
from the east
all right
all right
all right uh
oh sorry jamie
just messaged me
to say once again
the party destroys
my precious maps
very good
sorry jamie
all right the
prone one that
has like fallen
down um
takes the
takes an action
to get up
uh also is no
longer 10 feet
in here i should
clarify um
like clamber
up to here
and once again
tries to like
clambering up
coughing spittling
uh takes a shot
with the hand
crossbow that
they had out
actually no
wouldn't have
had it out
because they
would have been
flown so it
has to draw
their hand
crossbow so
that's their
action um
guy got fucking
guy got fucking
exploded falls
into the water
and is now
trying to figure
out what's going
on and some
red guy screaming
about shit
yup
um then i
have this
feller here
who's gonna do
like basically a
double move
down to here
legend
up to there
once again
sees man
screaming in
tree
um and
takes a shot
with a hand
crossbow
that that
will hit
um that
will but i
rolled an 18
so you know
that makes that
makes some
sense um
all right so
this will do
to you
10 hauser
uh eight
points of
damage as the
arrow soul
of the bolt
slams into
you
what does
the shield
do for this
uh it just
increases my
ac i think
uh yeah you
can um
and shield
block and
you can shield
block with it
yeah but
then you can't
cast shield
again like it
basically prevents
you from casting
shield once it
gets cracked
so you can
use the shield
block reaction
it has a
hardness of
five but
once it ends
you can't cast
the spell again
for 10 minutes
so it's up to
you if like that
plus one ac is
better or
i'll wait to a
more uh
substantial attack
before i consider
that okay
cool cool cool
cool um
so yeah like
smacks into
your side
but uh that's
about it for
that uh let's
see nothing
there rahua you're
up uh rahua is
actually this might
be something i have
to call upon my
narrative declaration
for i would like
to utilize the
essence of majesty
to call upon some
sorcerers to ferry
me over this
impassable muck
i need to get as
close as i can to
wear tan hauser in
this poor hapless
moop like a large
collection of
sorcerers come down
just pick you up
and you're t posing
across the water
that would be the
most ideal pose for
transportation it
stands for t
first of all
first of all
i fucking adore that
i like make a
terrain based
impediment you're
like a narrative
declaration to
ignore thurston's
bullet shit
really i approve
it's a good way to
use hero points
second of all
it's almost like i
have a token ready
for this
oh good
bird moment
so i'll just uh
you know it's like
i think i can
tactically move your
like token i don't
know is it like
ult i forget which
one it is is it
shift i forget
anyway you mount
don't worry about
looking in the
middle just move
it yeah you have
to do a bunch of
bullshit to get in
the center
yeah there you go
discord ferry your
king
it's like like
i i assume
baldric can like
pick turn turn
and suddenly this
like swarm of
saucers flies past
them
as uh the the
swarm sorter
ferries you to
this little islet
here um
and then the
swarm dissipates
uh flying off
in other directions
hoot hoot that's
a lot of guys
good fucking
luck hoot hoot
and they just
like break off
and like disappear
understandable
now thurston
would that consume
one of my actions
to have summoned
the swarm of
saucers uh yeah
i would count that
as a move action
yes okay
i would like to
use my remaining
two actions to
look at this man
right here
and look at what
he possibly may
once have been
and i'm gonna
cast an archic
barrage and try
and burn him
to death
oh okay
like using the
power of chaos
so this poor
person is yeeted
deleted out of
his tower
lands in the
muck
hears someone
shouting about
revolution like
crawls forward
takes a shot
misses and then
turns to witness
a t-posing tree
man carried
aloft by
yeah okay
sure
we had a bad
day
go
privately rolled
some dice
yeah
oh sorry
it's still on
that one
look at this
i can reveal
to everybody
there we go
uh yeah
you're getting
from us
yeah no hiding
sorry
you can uh
roll the
dimaggio
john dimaggio
okay here it
comes
my bad
it's 10
damage
uh yes
the blaze
like guy
staggers back
as he takes
damage from
probably like
rocks
like just like
rocks and
debris breaking
off of the
stone you're
on like
hurtling out
towards him
peppering him
as he's like
very good
very epic
good job
baldrick
hey thurston
yep
i would like
to withdraw
from the
people's loot
an object
yes
i am going
to withdraw
the potion
of flying
oh god
i've been
waiting
i've been
waiting
so long
this is
chat
you have
no idea
i'm so
proud
like looking
at their
equipment
and using
it
i'm like
i'm a
proud
i was waiting
for sound
i you know
what okay
and that potion
of flying was
originally in there
to fight the
sawsaurus so it's
like even better
you're using it
here so you
you pull out
the potion of
flying and then
i assume you
quaff it
yeah that'll be
two actions i
think right
bam there you
go
uh so now
that i am
flying 40
how high does
that put me
in the air
i'm assuming
i'm just
gliding though
right
well you can
like yeah
you can go
up like
basically you
40 feet
of movement
so you
could fly
40 feet
up or
you could
just like
fly above
the ground
like 40
feet
just hovering
basically
uh what the
fuck is my
throwing arm
i forgot
hang on
gotta check
my feet
so i want to
make sure i
don't screw
myself
i think for you
it's 30 feet
i think
yeah but i
have far
lobber too
so yeah
there we go
far blobber
so i
will actually
i will put
myself 10
feet up
and then
20 feet
over
or no
30 feet
over
so i'm
gonna go
there
yeah totally
yep and
that'll be my
that'll be my
shit
yeah
it's like
baldric
comes flying
uh
there
one more
pretty sure
right
yes
yeah
all right
very good
very good
so baldric
comes flying
god
oh this
muck i put
you found
ways to
overcome it
like you're
you're
you're smart
tactical players
yeah
um okay
well don't
patronize us
we will do
something very
mean to you
if you continue
to patronize
we will do
something very
stupid in this
game
you will beat
me up
um okay
all right
i'm gonna remove
the potion of
flying
no
fuck
all right
we got that
potion of
flying boys
glad we used
it
yeah okay
well uh
this guy like
starts trudging
through the muck
from the far
western
uh area
trudging through
trying to to
reach their
allies like
now the muck
has turned
against them
um similar
to their
their friend
who does the
same thing
just spends
all their
actions now
trudging through
muck
volley you're
up
yay
all right
i heard my
signal i heard
the boom
i'm going to
spend my first
action to kick
this fucking
door open
bam
oh oh
there we go
uh i'm going
to see
the man
the myth
the
legend
stands there
staring at
you
um
as you have
as you have
like
bopped in
the door
he's fucking
sitting in the
thing by
himself
oh sorry
and then
also on the
ground beside
because i had
to hide this
token
uh is is an
unconscious
victrix who
process like
turned and
sees you
enter
uh the
the elven
uh roguelike
swashbuckler
um turns
to you
and
well
well
well
uh you have
two actions
left folly
what are you
gonna do
i lived
bitch
uh i'm
going to
oh i don't
have a
straight shot
at him
with my
gun yet
so what
i am
going
to do
is i
am going
to use
my action
to tumble
through
him
okay
uh
so let's
let's give
you an
acrobatics
yep
oh my god
i've been
rolling terribly
is that
enough
um
not
they will
not be
enough to
gain you
panache
is that
worth a
hero point
yeah i'll
say it is
yeah i think
it is
well
that however
will just
be enough
probably
rolled a
for podcast
all right
uh
hello
bitch
boy
okay
as you
step into
this
okay
okay
so you're
going there
yes
okay
okay
so yeah
as you
step into
there
he like
turns
you have
one action
left
yeah i'm
going to
stab
him
sure
before you
stab
this is
for
there for
thurston
is victrix
considered an
ally because
in that
position
she'll
victrix
is is
currently on
a bed
unconscious
so
move victrix
up one
so it won't
count as
flat-footed
at all
to me
oh
can i
not
one sec
one sec
i can
put it
consider her
hostile
for the
purposes of
this
yeah
style
yeah i don't
know if it'll
count for that
but try it
anyway
oh yeah try it
anyways i can
set the thing
so
all right i'm
gonna finish his
ass uh putting
on my confident
finisher
do it
uh yep okay
that is checked
oh wait i have
to uh uh can
can you can you
because you do
not have panache
panache
uh i tumbled
through
oh that's right
yeah yeah
that's right
yeah yeah
all right my
foolishness
i did i did
click the button
i think it
worked either
that or it
just
yeah there you
go you got it
yeah i got you
all right uh so
let's once more
stab him in the
ass
oh oh no
all right that
will hit
that will hit
yeah oh my god
his ac is terrible
correct
this dude's like
level two and i'm
here unloading
everything
it's worth it
what do you expect
he he has low
constitution
he's an elf
and he's french
he's notoriously
weak
oh my god
holy shit
you don't get to
play today
was that minimum
of everything
it was like
one one one
two
yeah you got
one two in
there yeah
holy shit
even your dice
rolls
okay
hey thurston
take your ten
points of damage
you son of a
bitch
thurston since you
placed my character
in there can i
have vision
oh yeah
well you're
unconscious so
um you give
volley vision when
she's unconscious
she's been
unconscious more
hey urnzil uh
can you move a
little closer to
your window i'm
trying to line up
a shot
oh sure
all right
you're gonna hit
me there's no
buildings nearby
that's i wanted it
at this exact
moment i just
wanted this exact
moment for that
truck to drive by
just
with odo in
the trunk
no scoped
thurston do you
mean the one
that literally just
drove by
yes okay good
um
all right
okay
sorry had to
give you one for
free on guard
pussy
and i believe
that's the end of
your go
that's my go
okay
you're gonna have
so many people
attacking us
uh you hear
uh you hear chanting
to the south of
you volley
as the spell
caster that was
invisible turns
visible and
casts a spell
at you
uh can you
give me a will
save please
i guess
okay there we go
there's my good
roll that's a
uh and you
just hear drop
your weapon
um in in
common and as
as it happens
you you like
manage to to
hold on to
your weapon
without dropping
it
i'd prefer not
to but you
could drop
yours
you're awfully
cute i'd hate
to do something
to your face
um
volley make a
flirt check
this art is
very cute i like
the children of
the blaze
yeah yeah here
i will i will
share this art
as i also get
the uh get
the uh the
spell casting
um and
then of course
there is you
know some uh
some some some
spell casting uh
follow-up element
there that is
happening that i
will say when
i uh finish
doing this
okay there
we go
cool you
know spell
caster look
at that spell
caster with
the cool staff
and the and
the stuff by
s elliot very
good look at
that there you
go sophie very
good and then
this this one who
appeared all
epically to try
to make you drop
your weapon which
would have been
great casts the
same thing
tenhuzer did and
cast shield i
appreciate you
making her so
girly pop s
elliot very very
very girl
sophie's very
good at making
girly pop she's
very good at
this i like the
standard issue
pompadour the
other one goes
up to the flame
makes some hand
gestures and then
moves closer across
the surviving
bridge
uh the the
the gnoll that
was like hurled
uh or not hurled
but like hit by
debris it now
goes um having
having turned
turned over um
sees what is
happening here
and will
get me up to
the edge of the
rocks and look
over at
i think no no
not not in
range of that
uh not in
range of a lot
of stuff that
they could do
which is which
is very sad
um craft i am
out of range
sound
uh yes yes
uh instead
as they move
up they begin
to to move
their hands
also they are
also no longer
10 feet up i
don't know why
oh it's the one
under yeah that's
why haha ignore
that box okay
um the the the
gnoll begins like
casting a a magic
spell and conjures
forth a spiritual
weapon a dagger
that uh appears
next to tanhouser
and attempts to
actually no no
appears next to
oh okay
yeah yeah now
that i now
that i think
about this a
bit more
actually now
that i think
about this
bit more
one sec
yeah okay
yeah go
right to
right to
rahua
and it's
like spiritual
flaming dagger
appears and
begins to
stab at you
rahua
that's very
cute however
it will miss
because i only
rolled a 21
it was it
was dancing
with that 20
that was it
was there was
dancing happening
there oh
all right
that brings
us to
prance
du shelf
the gel
come at me
prance
di giorno
first of all
prance uses
one of his
abilities
can't we be
de friends
and then
then he
attempts
to faint
you
not very
good
which will
be a
fail
so you
are not
fainted
valley
what
oh of course
we can be
friends
prance
come here
come a little
closer
i don't believe
you i failed
my check
i will just
hit you
with my
blade
this guy's
great
glad we
killed
yeah it
was very
cruel
about
holy crap
i think
it's 26
just hits
you
nimble
dodge
so one
to do
the feint
one to
do that
and for
his last
move
prance
exits through
the front
door
you
son
of a
bitch
and like
gets to
the destroyed
bridge
and stands
at the
end
of it
actually
like
they're
like
oh
fuck
hit
this
pants
grab
holy
fuck
holy
fuck
the
shit
the
bridge
it is
gone
and as
he
has
this
horrific
realization
and looks
to see
tanhauser
spider-man
squatting
in the
woods
the
the
dis
like
discorporating
flurry
of
burbs
and
um
all
of
all
of
these
things
um
yeah
uh
that
causes
him
to
stop
his
action
and
that
is
the
end
of
his
go
um
then
this
other
guy
goes
like
trumps
in
through
the
water
and
that's
all
of
his
go
and
then
pick
turn
squelch
foot
is
our
second
last
person
to
go
this
round
and
pick
turn
our
boy
our
our
our
amazing
amazing
boy
yep
i have to
point out
um
i apologize
to the
0.5%
of the
audience
that's
from
france
i had to
go look
at our
analytics
i'm like
sorry
sorry
my
apologies
to the
people
of
actual
france
i mean
you
no
intent
however
i do
mean
malintent
towards
the
french
elf
here
if you
happen to
be a
french
elf
in the
audience
i know
who you
are
and we're
coming for
you
you're
french
canadian
we think
you're
a fairy
tale
so we
don't
know
if
you
i play
i play
an
elizen
in
final
fantasy
they're
all
french
elves
i
don't
know
that
is
true
they all
sound
freaking
french
i hope
alphino
becomes
quebec
just the
whole place
yeah he
just turns
into a
landmass
that's like
how phil
leotardo
can turn
into a
house
okay
and then
then
pictor
and squelch
foot
moves to
the edge
of the
water
bagpipes
at the
ready
and begins
playing
um
and uh
yeah
yeah
uh
that will
be a
thing
oh
come
on
i've
gotta
have
gotta
gotta
find
a
cool
thing
for
him
i don't
know
is this
like
gonna work
yeah
anyways
he begins
uh
inspiring
and i
will get
those
effects
on all
of you
because
you know
hey
it's what
he does
um
okay
cool
and then
that leaves
us with
oran
okay
so if
i remember
correctly
uh
for shape
shifting i
can just
no longer
maintain it
and just
it just
goes away
uh
yeah i
believe this
is the
sustained
thing
yeah
yeah
so i won't
be sustaining
it
anything so
boosh i am
no longer a
frog
i am now
just chilling
in the water
which i
i strix origin
and stuff
i'm a short
or line one
so and then i have
underwater marauders
defeat so i'm
pretty good
he's just
trying to
trying to put
in spark
courage and
everyone
no no i
was just
trying to
see who
was actually
in the
burst
oh yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
cool
it's over
that or
we'll do
we'll do
that and
he'll spend
one action
let's see
he's going
to spend
one action
so bad
i can't
i potentially
can't
yeah
i want to
spend
one action
to cast
jump
oh
and it takes
one action
to do so
your legs
surge with
strength
ready to
leap high
and far
you jump
30 feet
in any
direction
without touching
the ground
you must
land on
the space
of solid
ground
within 30
feet
of you
or else
you fall
next action
and uh
i basically
like
by beginning
a frog
form
boing
but then
i go
back to
normal
as oran
and i
land uh
pretty much
right behind
this guy
just yeah
pow just
pretty much
land on
the ground
and then
for the
my final
two actions
i'm going
to cast
dinosaur
form and
i'm going
to become
my tyrannosaurus
rex
this guy
is having
the worst
fucking
day
and i think
i'm still
invisible
so
you
are
because
because
turning
into a
t-rex
is actually
not a
hostile
action
so
he's being
attacked
by lip
biscuit
lip
biscuit
all right
the power
of new
metal
surge
is through
you
warren
the
undertale
keeps cutting
out
right
i don't
know why
i don't
know why
yeah
i'm literally
looking at
my audio
levels
going it's
not cut
out
once
i go back
to the
vaud and
do not
ever hear
cut out
i think
people are
losing their
minds
is or
in the
last one
it is
and i think
this is where
we should
take our
break
as the
invisibility
rex
and then
we will
see what
happens
oh boy
we're coming
to round
six
let's go
we'll be right
back everyone
see you in a bit
yay
and we're
back
i have
i have
i have
just turned
into a
t-rex
and for
some reason
the dumb
transformation
thing gave
an error
saying
hey
well guess
what
you can't
do that
you can't
turn into
a fucking
t-rex
what's wrong
with you
we don't
allow that
yeah
it should
say like
personal token
setting or
something
transformation
thing and
it says
you walk
to the
missing user
permissions
if you're
your token
settings
use file
browse
yeah
so token
permissions
it doesn't
whatever
it's fine
anyway
we're back
welcome back
i think that
was the end
of my turn
that was
um
hey
hulky
yeah
you want to
roll me
damage
absolutely
let me
hit you
with that
give me
two seconds
yeah
and it
was a
crit
so
that wasn't
the right
person
that's fine
whack
this all
beam effect
come out
of the
door
there she
goes
well that's
fine
hulky activates
this fucking
particle beam
yeah
i was still
targeting that
one
cool
thank you
thank you
for that
uh hulky
welcome
uh all
of you
who are
engaged
in the
combat
here
a like
resounding
boom sound
from the
west
followed by
like a
sharp
scream
from one
of the
the blaze
members
uh the
one that
you can
kind of
see
trucking
through
the
muck
uh
t-rex
oran
is the
one who
is the
clearest
line of
sight
to seem
like
stagger
forward
as
something
impacts
his
shoulder
um
all right
tanhauser
in the
tree
spider
tanhauser
you're up
all righty
then i
am gonna do
something a
little spicy
i'm going
to run
up to the
edge of
this tree
would you
assume this
is the
edge of
the tree
um
sure
okay
and i
am going
to teleport
utilizing
my uh
beautiful
ability
dimensional
assault
uh
which will
be half
of my
speed
oh it
even lets
me teleport
now
that's so
cute
um
here's
the thing
half
of my
speed
should
actually
get me
a little
bit further
than it's
allowing me
because i
have haste
as well
as laughing
shadow
which makes
half of my
speed
um
rounding
around
like 25
would you
say
um
so
round up
round down
up to you
you
always
round
down
to
screw
the
player
that's
the
rule
that
is
true
okay
so i
will
teleport
here
okay
okay well
i'm just
gonna
hello
just appearing
in a
conflux
of geometry
uh
look over
at our
good friend
to shelf
debunk
it's been
a while
to shelf
uh
and i
am
with my
two
remaining
actions
going
to
cast
uh
produce
flame
okay
um
and so
i'm
actually
no i'm
gonna cast
electric arc
okay
uh
and so
i'm going
to ask
both of
these
beautiful
people
to make
me
cross
will
succeed
okay
and the
spellcaster
will
also
succeed
but
give me
damage
right
yeah
yeah
no crit
successes
there
so
all right
so
seven
i got
it
as like
electricity
or
say
discord
corrupted
all right
sorry
we talked
over your
whole moment
that's fine
it's not like
i care
or anything
it's okay
you can say
you're not
i come on
it's hand
script
you could
just read
all right
wake
wake
sincara
i'll repeat
the spot
it seems
your luck
has run
out
as the
electricity
is still
going through
his system
is he
haunting
while he
dies
oh wait
i am
gonna spend
my hero
point for
something
okay
a narrative
declaration
okay
my bolt
of electricity
my electric
arc
was so
potent
that it
has electrified
the door
hinges
and the
doorknob
making it
incapable
of being
closed
occurring
oh wow
miss
he has a
right
ptsd
i do
yeah
just to like
what was it
like the fourth
section
when i defeated
all the speaker's
plans with
i closed the
door
yeah i'm melting
i'm melting
the hinges
no longer
closed
so petty
you are
beautiful
all right
um
down here
um
this
this fellow
this blaze
agent who is
by the destroyed
bridge
steps forward
um
and reloads
as part of
the step
uh
for one
action
uses another
action to
sort of like
point
and like
get a sense
of you
uh
rahua
and um
then
uh
takes a
takes a
shot
against
uh
you
rahua
with the
hand crossbow
oh shit
that's right
here we go
here
we
go
i miss
rift
not very good
uh
because he
missed me
that's a
physical ranged
attack
i'm gonna
use a
reaction
so given
that my
soulforged
shield is
up uh
just because
it's up
currently
uh
the arrow
flying past
rahua
rahua
similar to
the previous
encounter
which this
was actually
relevant in
reaches his
hand back
and sucks
the arrow
out of the
air
in like
a little
singularity
and then
extends his
other arm
towards the
blaze member
who just
shot it
at him
and sends
the arrow
hurtling
back towards
him
oh
oh shit
what ability
is that
that seems
cool
i think i just
roll a d20
because it's
just attempt
to range
strike
yeah
that one
that's from
uh
that is
soulforged
soulforged
yes
yeah
let me
double check
here
oh
it's
it's
base three
so i don't
think it's
augmented by
anything
so oh
well
oh well
a lack of
a lass
i think it
might be
but i'll
double check
that
what was
the name
of that
specific
usage
word again
uh
it is
reflecting
spirit
i gain
plus two
status
moments
two ac
against
physical
range
attacks
but enemies
physical
range
attack
you
use
reaction
to
immediately
attempt
to range
strike
against
the
attacker
using
the
projectile
that
missed
ah
gotcha
gotcha
gotcha
so you
would
oh that's
an interesting
one i i you
would probably
get like your
level and stuff
it'd still miss
but like yeah
you would actually
get a regular
strike
cool cool
cool all right
um well that one
is like
staggers back
as the bolt
comes flying even
though it smashes
into the ground
beside them
um okay
uh the one
who's having the
worst day ever
is confident
now but also
has been barraged
by you
um so
reloads the
hand crossbow
marks you
and then also
takes a shot
at you
ooh and
will hit
you
yeah
lovely
okay so
uh this
will be
uh however
however that
will do
six and
then i
also do
additional
1d8
of precision
damage
as he
strikes
you
uh in
the
eye
so i'm
just gonna
do this
plus the
four
who was
saying
bitch
as you
take eight
points from
this like
strike on
you
um like
it seems
really smug
with himself
as he's
like fired
it and
holds it
all badass
um and
then of
course the
audience
is like
the only
one privy
to the
giant
invisible
t-rex
behind
him
apologies
if you
can hear
my
loud
ass
cat
purring
uh a
a
elemental
of fire
bursts
out from
the
bonfire
at the
center
of the
camp
and begins
like
gleefully
rushing
towards
the
destroyed
oh
fuck
you
little
man
um
that's
um
then this
fellow here
uh seeing
his master
in in
danger
like moves
into the
muck
uh reloading
the hand
crossbow
designating
tanhauser
as a
target
and then
takes a
shot
with the
hand
crossbow
and misses
terribly
uh as
like the
arrow goes
and plunks
into the
side of
the
building
and
process
like
watch
where
you
are
the
shooting
um
okay
watch
where
you
are
the
shooting
that's
right
rahua
you're
up
so
i
am
oh
you
think
you're
so
fucking
smart
do you
shooting
me
in
my
eye
i'll
just
watch
you
fucking
laugh
when i
burn
you
into
nothing
uh
anarchic barrage
time
okay
yeah
hit him
again
oh my god
the temptation
just
wastes this
man
instantly
but i
need
to
i love
that
you're
like
i want
to use
my most
powerful
ability
on this
guy
that
there
are
clearly
i'm
using
bone shaker
on him
shake
his
bones
he is
not
deserving
of
something
so
extra
silly
what
is
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
a
will
hit him
just
okay
phew
adjust
doing
damage
woof
he like
staggers
back from
the
continued
barrage
of
incoming
just like
bolts
striking
him
uh
taking
a
breather
is
still
still
somewhat
confident
as he
plans
to be
ready
what's
your
third
action
gonna
be
uh
my
third
action
i am
going
to
where
is
it
in
my
inventory
oh
no
oh
no
they're
using
their
inventory
chat
help
me
it's
like
i gave
them
stuff
i'm
gonna
beat
your
ass
thurston
you
are
actually
right
now
so
uh
i'm
going
to
invoke
the essence
of majesty's
innate ability
which is
once per
day
uh
treat
one of
my
cantrips
as a
one
action
uh
cast
time
and i'm
going to
use
anarchic
barrage
on him
again
for my
remaining
action
touche
hey
touche
barrage
this fool
yeah
do it
blow him
up
blow him
up
beat him
up
that'll
that'll
just
hit
yeah
give me
jean
dimaggio
let me
show you
what real
fire
looks like
okay
okay
okay
damage
you
murder
this man
with
like
piercing
like
nails
that come
out
from
from the
air
around
you
and
skewer
him
in the
face
causing
him
to
retract
and fall
back
dying
his last
sight being
some
strange ripple
in the air
above him
that he will
never know
the dark
truth
of just
how close
to death
he truly
was
until he
dies
then he
dies
then he
knows
knowing is
half the
battle
baldrick
you're up
all righty
i'm gonna make
a 40-foot move
right over there
flying along
the water
yep
i'm going to
target
the gnoll
as the epicenter
okay
and i'm gonna
throw a bomb
do it up
let me see
here
incoming
la bomba
draw and
throw
ba-boom
see what
happens
throw it
up
oh
yeah
so
a lack
and a
last
no splash
damage
as it just
goes
completely
wild
and yeah
there is a
complication
thank you
oh
oh
boy
you get
to suffer
thanks to
people on
patreon
stop saying
or i'll kick
your ass
complication
oh
if you
want to
make
arendelle's
day worse
you too
can go to
patreon.com
for
declaration
and uh
you know and
listen to more
cringe singing
singing and
also see what you
can do to affect
the uh the party
members themselves
with your own
complication results
as thurston
as you're hunting
for one
um
i would just
like to
it was like
what's balderick
doing as he's
slorping forward
oh i've got
one now
okay
oh this one
i was giving him
an rp prompt
you can
i appreciate it
but this one's
gonna lead
into some rp
prompt
it's called
ricochet
ricochet
your throne
item bounces
off the enemy
and hits
a different
target
one sec
who submitted
that complication
thurston
uh lord
zero did
thanks lord zero
zero
and now
um
so the
the ricocheting
uh can hit
a grand total
of i will say
three people
in this area
it can hit
this fellow
next
this fellow
over here
or fly all the
way back
at balderick
representing
balderick
dropping it
um
one will be
this person
two will be
this person
three will be
balderick
and i will
make uh
erndale roll
the 1d3
to determine
who is struck
it is
one
it is one
all right
uh so in that
case what is the
splash damage on
it
splash damage on
the moderate
alchemist fire
if you click the
damage button
you'll get it
all
okay fine
excellent
enemy of math
it's four
it's four but
then you also
add your um
my oh no
until
is it calculate
that i don't
think so
yeah because it's
that plus my
intelligence modifier
it's calculated
splash plus four
on there
that's the
damn it yeah
bonus to hit
those so
uh actually it
might it might be
factored in there
so yeah okay
cool
this deal's four
then like
that's not correct
probably like five
i think i don't
know
yeah i think it
should
um it should at
the bottom there
but yeah i'll i'll
i'll figure it out
but yeah you you do
splash to both of
them so
light's a thing
um okay
in that case i'm
going to uh
do that again
oh actually no it
is four because
it is your
modifier not
added plus so
it is four okay
cool okay fine
yeah so i'm
gonna throw
another bomb at
him yeah
targeting the
gnoll still
yep cool
using a grenade
go
another
save
oh
no
welcome guys
i'm eating
them up for
you
go on thurston
holy fucking
bingle
oh i'm sorry
i scared my
cat
sorry b
sorry b
b
all right
string theory
this is appropriate
it's in the
moment
it's a butterfly
effect
ahem
this one is
entitled
woot woot
when
when the the
pc's errant
shot hits a
local sawsorer
or unknown
but basically
yeah it hits
a local
sawsorer
the sawsorer
makes one
attack
and then
says
hoot hoot
i'll remember
this
so
and then i'll
just make an
attack with a
sawsorer
we'll see how
effective they
are at this
level of
gameplay
thurston i'm
going to punch
the sawsorer
in the skull
oh okay
well do you
have any actions
left
hey wait wait
why are people
blaming me for
underl's bad luck
do uh
my dice rolls are
that bad
your bad luck
has gone to him
transfer
does 25 hit you
i think it does
i have an ac of
25 so
ah good
the creature level
one manages to
hit you
wait i'm flying
does that give me
any bonus ac
no
and does max
damage
that's fine
it's a
sawsorer
hoot hoot
i'll remember
this as the
like your bomb
hits
hits where the
sawsorer was
still in the air
not actually
cracking and
exploding but
like hitting it
in the air
causing it to
fly off
and it comes
down and
it brings
its saw
against the
side of
you
hoot hoot
and then he
flies off
one of the
stragglers
from the
new king's
retinue
i ate all
the uh
the crit
fails guys
so
yeah
so
so
that's
it
hopefully
that's
the last
one
knock on
you know
no one else
is allowed
and this one
is going to
take all of
their their
actiony times
to get
just onto
there
this one
is going
to spend
all of
their
actiony times
to get
up to
the air
trudging
through
muck and
stone
volley
you're up
oh boy
muck and
stone
swamp
dwarves
all right
um
man
they are in
such a
perfect line
for me to
take a
big shot
at them
but i do
say i have
somebody who
i could
revive right
here
if she's
unconscious
hmm
decisions
you'll be adding
another fighter
to the business
but you also
have hate
i have so much
hatred in my
heart
uh i'm going
to spend
i'm gonna have
to move
to get next
to her
aren't i
that's
fine
i'm going
to uh
move here
and then i'm
going to
uncork an
elixir of life
and pour it
into where i
assume victrix's
mouth is
i'll pull her
mask down
a little bit
i see some
ugly fucked up
looking chap lips
oh girl
i i pull
i pull a thing
of chapstick
out of my
bag too
girl
fix her up
a bit
yeah and i'm
gonna pour the
elixir of life
in her mouth
okay
uh and then
with my third
action i am
going to turn
uh seeing this
uh child of the
blaze here and
go hey could you
move your head
aside just a
little bit and
i'm going to
take a shot
at uh
do shelf
okay yeah
give me an
attack roll
on your
shelf please
i would i
would be delighted
to uh wait
where's the
ranged button
for this
this one
this one i think
is the ranged
button yes
bang
four
you hit
four
yeah
yeah
seven damage
he staggers as
the bullet hits
him
oh
where are you
going
where from
from you
okay
how do you
know
to be
shot
it hurts
it hurts
okay
um
that's
well
all right
you throw
him the
fucking
healing
thing at
vick are
we waiting
until the
end
to have
read it
out to
the
oh
should i
go ahead
and roll
that
oh wait
one sec
one sec
um
i've got
vick actually
in the
thing i
just need
to
uh
do
something
here
one sec
vick was
actually at
the bottom
yeah
so that
earned a
b-teamer
that's her
yeah it's
earned a
b-teamer
look
the token
is just
that's 18
hit points
for victrix
okay
wow
i love
that
wow
that's
good
that's
good
here we
go
okay
she's about
to get up
like soda
popinski
does when
you knock
him
down
okay
do you need
help thurston
or
uh no
i'm
i'm just
debating
how i'm
you know
what
no i
know
that
process
like after
being
shut
so
this
lady walks
out
kind of
going to
the edge
of the
bridge
it's a
move
action
and then
she's
gonna
cast
a
spell
yeah
that'll
do
that'll
do
oh
fuck
um
magic
yeah
so i
don't
want to
say that
there was
like some
you know
propheticness
here
but um
can i
uh
get
uh
baldric
rahua
picturn
and
um
the
invisidinosaur
to all
give me
reflex saves
please
you should
be able
to
click
the button
as
uh
this
this caster
comes inside
and immediately
begins
uh
casting
a
fireball
for rolls
oran
rolled
a
and
oh
we got
i got
a
in total
i got
a
i will
uh
i'll
hear a
point
that
actually
i'll do
a little
here
it's
probably
fair
reflex is
like the
worst
thing
i have
and i
made
it
worse
i
know
no
i
made
it
better
and i
made
it
better
the
hell
yeah
yeah
so
everyone
here
succeeds
except
for
uh
baldric
who
critically
succeeds
so
baldric
takes
no
damage
from
the
erupting
fireball
the
rest
of
you
he
heard
duxelph
whining
loud enough
he knew
to get
away
yeah
um
we'll
take
uh
this will
be
nine
i'll
just
apply
it
here
so
next
time
there's
added
a
thing
if
you
target
the
tokens
you
want
to
do
yeah
i
know
it'll
do
all
the
fancy
shit
for
you
i
saw
that
but
i'll
still
do
my
thing
this
way
okay
and
the
fireball
goes
off
and
explodes
um
then
you
hear
but
you're
supposed
to
clear
them
out
and
look
at
the
bucket
dodged
um
i'm no longer
invisible at that
point right
uh
you
you're
still invisible
you haven't taken
hostile action
yet
yeah
don't worry
i'll
i'll help
sir
and the other one
comes and does
the exact same
thing
motherfucker
orn's just in
admin mode right
now you can see the
flames roll over the
model but it's not
there yeah
it's just
wow
here one sec
here one sec
i'm just gonna uh
target all these tokens
now that zern has
explained and um
you know i'll just uh
here here we'll just
let's put it in there
again as i throw out
my second
fireball of the
day um
yeah
they know how
reflexes for all of
them so i can click
this button
and then add mine
sparker
and then it gets
all right i roll a
oh that's cool
i see
so right click that
fireball thurston area
and um with everyone
rolling might be a bit
difficult right click it
and do pop out so you
can manage it while the
roll's gone
and i'll hit a
uh you did you
re-roll to a natural
one
yeah
but do you have
zero points i don't
think you do
one from the recap one
from the fun before
but you can't remember
remember you can't
use zero points
on natural ones
that was our
because there's going
to be a complication
too
no it wasn't a
natural one before
it re-rolled
to a natural one
oh yeah
yeah that oh good
okay that's even
funnier
that's even better
all right
but bulgic and
picture are unaffected
unaffected
y'all
um
yeah so for the
damage you'll see
it highlighted now
on your end and
you just click it
it'll just do all
the damage
yeah yeah so you
can see which one
you want yeah so
you'll see yeah
oh that's cool
yeah yeah yeah
that's neat
it's very very
useful yeah okay
so what i'll do
here is i'll click
on uh or well
it's hard of course
when i have a token
selected i can't
click on you because
you're invisible to
the token so uh
or and you'll take
that and then uh
uh you will take
42 points of fire
damage as the
second fireball
explodes
oh great
sting you um
and or and you
continue to take
some some char and
burn from all of
this um that will
be the second
spellcaster um
now i've got
this gnoll here
i do this it's
sorry chat i
understand the the
the encounter
tracker we have it's
it's fucking huge
right now so it's
not a good way to
fit it we'll take
it over the
entire screen
don't worry
it'll go down
soon yeah
all right so
this gnoll begins
trucking through
the muck
nope uh still
not close enough
so continues
trucking through
the muck
towards rahua
spending
actually yeah
all of their
actions just gets
them to there
so that
uh pros du
shelf goes
ross will
make an acrobatics
oh sorry an
athletics check in
this case
sure oh he
hopping oh he
hopping right now
oh he doesn't
happen to
you got three
villain points
he attempts to
jump and lands in
the muck
and then spends his
remaining actions to
get out of the muck
and like tries to
get over here
rushing away but
then sees baldric
and it's like oh
no
if any of you
kill still do
shelf i'll never
forgive you
look i'm a genius
oh no we gotta have
a conversation
okay i have the
perfect opportunity
the predator this
motherfucker like
just like cloak
goes away and i
just go
you know he killed
volley that is
true i was my
plan was to
literally hold off
the rest so volley
could get her revenge
kill but thurston
ruined that so we
have an opportunity
don't you fucking
blame it
i am blaming you
you made that
motherfucker jump
across a gap
i i hey chat chat
i want chat i want
you to understand
zoran's logic
du shelf is running
past an invisible t-rex
he cannot see
zoran is blaming
thurston for his
inability to control
himself
exactly
so all that
shit was set up
and volley could
have got the
revenge kill in the
building could have
a whole moment
now i see i see
a fucko in front
of me and i have
to make the i have
to make the out of
character moral
decision of destroying
him when one bite
or letting him
potentially get away
because he's going
to run the entire
time so i'm going
to ask you odo
what would you like
me to do i'll
god what do you
want
also remember you
have freedom of
movement too
yeah i do have
freedom of movement
so i i can chase
this man uh i would
say he is a low
priority because he
does not do very
much damage i would
say kill the mages
because they're going
to be chucking
fireballs and all
that i will i will
let i will i'll
he's yours
i'm not going
to touch
thank you
thank you
my magnanimous
friend
still let him
lead you on a
five gen chase
picture and
continues advancing
through the swamp
which is like up
to his chest
while playing
bagpipes
marching like a
soldier inspiring
everyone but
volley
loops me around
the killer shack
that's on me
that's right
he should be
dead by daylight
he pallets you
the entire way
he pallets you
by throwing
rahua in your
path
new behavior
is a new
killer
volley
so she's
blue
the blue
one
i should have
been looking
this up
the entire
time
i apologize
i would like
i would like
to jump
not via the
spell
but just
by the
action
um
which
jump
against
an action
your leg
serves
restrained
through the
leap higher
and far
you jump
no that's
a spell
god damn it
it's the
it's the long
jump
sorry my bad
i was looking
at the rules
so i can do
it a little bit
more correctly
you strive
to make a
horizontal leap
across
and attempt
athletics
check to
increase the
length
you ever
jumped
it takes
two actions
for me
to do
this
um
my plan
is to
like
whoosh past
the shelf
and um
and what i'm
wanting to do
is make it
become a giant
target for
everyone
and i basically
want to land
here
across the
bridge
where these
threes are
three are
on this
land space
and then start
just causing
chaos
hopefully they
go oh shit
it's a t-rex
and come after
me allow my
friends to have
more movement
um
yeah that's
that's my
plan
so i would
like to long
jump that
takes two
actions
uh
yeah i think
for if i
really hear the
dc for the
athletics check
is equal to
the total
distance and
feet you're
attempting to
move during
your leap so
you need to
cdc 20
check for
leap of
20 feet
so
obviously i
stride up and
go i believe
yeah okay
so i'm going to
make an
athletics check
correct
yep i will
get you
we'll see how
far it takes
you okay i
have an 18
athletics right
now so
hopefully that
should be enough
unless you
roll a one
i roll the
two
holy
crap
i'm going to
hero i'm going
to hero point
that i'm gonna
hero point that
into a one
wait you said
you said you
said you had
18 athletics
yeah it says
plus eight
18 so i don't
know why i did
plus 11
oh i think
because it's
not the
dinosaur form
isn't yeah
so you passed
it you passed
it with a 21
yeah if you
want to
yeah for some
reason it didn't
do it it says
pussy
i work weird
anyway yeah
it would be
20 or over
20 is that
okay
i don't know
how you rolled
a minus five
yeah really
really confused
there oh
oh wait how far
are you moving
you want to move
to like
i want to
get to here
that's 40
it's like i'm
basically moving
like i stride
and then i jump
right
uh yeah
you'd 10
long jump
okay
yeah
you stride
then make a
horizontally
okay
yeah
you're good
okay i arrived
there and for my
last action i want
to look at this
guy over to my
right who i think
shot at somebody
at some point
and i want to do
the big crunch
do the big crunch
right
and strength
crunch is here
actually no
i'm trying to make
sure i'm doing
right plus 17
okay it's plus 17
there we go
because our because
of how transformation
i have like strength
and trained and all
this other stuff
like i could have
got like a plus 28
so i'm like oh no
but as i do so i
just want the
invisibility to like
fade away
stop
that i wanted
i wanted to like
fade away
and there's just a
large war
just comes out
as i bite into
this guy
and i critically
hit
let's go
i got a 32 total
on 15 on the die
and with that damage
i i'm doing my
jaw attack
i roll
a 2d12
got two
two and a 10
on the die
but all the pluses
i do 42 points
of damage to him
oh
spicy
ouch
just
i'm just like
just kind of like
switching my head
left and right
and i and i look
to all the others
at the end of the
attack
another roar
comes out
just trying to be
loud
and obnoxious
bubble
and i do like
that side
jurassic park
eye
of the shelf
and just do like
the slight head
moment of left
and right
like uh-uh
it's a fucking
jurassic park
copyright
i don't even know
what that is
my versimilitude
oh that's the end of my turn
ruining my versimilitude
yeah okay well
okay how about
how about you
coax yourself
with the second character
you get to play
this combat
oh boy
i will cope
cope
i cope
all right
can you can you
take her out of
unconscious
just because i can't
fucking see her
why can you not
you should have
access to her
one sec
sorry and now
uh one sec
foundry is
seized up
the sec
one sec
one sec
tacking tacking
tacking tacking
tacking tacking
tacking
sorry
sometimes it
gets wonky
if i have to
jump between
windows
you should
have access
let me
oh i know
why
oh no
moment
permissions
you know
it's like
why am i not
seeing any of
the pcs
oh yeah
because i
currently have
saucer typed
in as a
filter
um
why are there
no saucers
in the
where are
they
why is it
like three
things in
here and
they're all
saucers
yeah you
should be
the owner
that
yeah you
absolutely
should have
ownership of
this token
uh oh
it's
no you
should absolutely
have ownership
i don't have
anything sorry
no that's
fair um
is it because
you have her
unconscious
no just
prone so
yeah i still
can't see her
oh wait
one sec
just get rid
of the token
and put it
back in
yeah part
of it is
is there
like uh
yeah does
he have to
have ownership
of the
character as
well like
in his
player thing
yeah because
i've got
i've got
configure
ownership
he earned
ill is owner
of it so
yeah just
drag the
token from
the thing
back
now i
got it
yeah okay
there i'm
good
more likely
you put it
in there
before you
made a
change
and uh
yeah
all right
there you
go yeah
right anyway
uh like
a second
after you
fire your
gun volley
you hear
a sputtering
like
good morning
where the hell
am i
uh unconscious
in uh well
conscious now
in uh
some shack
in the middle
of the swamp
sounds like
you had a good
time
where the fuck's
my spear
where is it
where's my cutter
it's probably
like right next
to the bed
i would assume
thurston
uh yeah
yeah it's
typical villain
tactics
prostitut shelf
keeps the
equipment right
by the person
who is uh
are you sassing
me
no i'm i'm
i'm saying
prostitut shelf
is fucking
terrible at
everything he
does so
yes it is
there
give me this
damn thing
i'm gonna spend
an action to
pick up the
the glaive
and she is
armed again
where is he
where's that
knife here
piece of
shit
outside
but uh
i've got
dibs
you could
sense her
glaring at
you and
then she
just charges
out
fine
and she
will
blitz past
you
uh
can i not
go through
here
no
thurston
help
i cannot
move
you should be
able to
there
go
thank you
could not
move
through
uh
this mage
is about
to become
collateral
damage
oh
okay
i'm going
to
strike
chop
that will
be a
critical
hit
yes
yes
it
will
goodbye
vali's
small
interest
now
small
pieces
not
not very
impressive
oh
i didn't
do the
critical
my bad
let me
re-roll
that
yeah
you have
to click
critical
my bad
let's get
critical
critical
much better
six
yeah
and the move
five feet
of your
toys
correct
i'm going
to throw
her into
the fucking
muck
there
there
she lets
out a
like
cough
as like
you
impale
her slightly
and push
her through
get out of
my way
get out of
her way
go get
your damn
elf
aww
that's so
sweet
oh no
you're up
damn right
but i'm not
going to kick
your ass
she is
and she's
going to
point behind
her
hey
halki
thanks
victrix
you're
you're
you're
you're
you're
you're
you're
you're
like
roll me
an attack
roll
she is
an
absolutely
now there
was a
previous one
made
because i
have action
spells
yeah
should i
roll damage
for that
first
or
uh no
no
no
just give
me a new
one here
okay
that's
fine
i think
that hits
yeah you
want to
give me
dimaggio
yeah
i love
how sometimes
when you
roll the
thing
hulky
it sometimes
just makes
a wet
sound like
a wet
sock
hitting
so
i know
can you
give me
a second
damage
roll
for the
other
one
absolutely
uh
you should
also
stay with
an additional
one
jesus christ
sweet
bass boost
noise
because of
uh
reasons
you want to
roll that
as well
sure
reasons
oh
nice
oh
can i
permit it
to make
a map
minus
five
yep
sure
let's
go
crunch
sweet
give me
uh
okay
well this
person will
never uh
never make
it to
to serve
with their
allies
as um
i got like
yeah the only
one who's
really got like
good line of
sight is still
oran
um
so yeah
like oran
is your t-rex
look around
there's one
coming in the
distance who
is riddled
with what
appears to
be like
blasts from
behind until
they fall
into the
uh
into the
water
uh
tanhauser
you're up
ah
yes
um
okay
well
uh
do we
have a
plan
i'm
i'm
imagining
that
our
good
friend
victrix
can
finish
off
the
mage
uh
so
i'm
going
to
rush
past
her
um
and i guess
i think
i my
movement
you see
and then
i've
got
uh
left
so
uh
yeah
that should
work
and i
will
uh
true strike
as my
advanced
targeting
system
roars
to
life
um
and i
stop laughing
it's already
irritating
and i'm
going to
spell strike
him
with a
shocking
grasp
as you
come in
to spell
strike
the uh
the little
hee hoo
ha ha
funny
um
funny fire
elemental
we shall
see what
happens
yes
the funny
rat
bastard
that'll
hit
that'll
hit
but i
do
get
to
roll
again
and
pick
the
highest
yep
oh
that's why
he whipped
at me
all right
so let's
roll the
damage
first
uh
seven
plus
i think
two
so nine
just to
start
and
now
the
actual
main
the
electricity
yes
electricity
electricity
electricity
electricity
he's gonna
give him
the power
as electricity
arcs over
this little
like flaming
elemental
that stares
at you
now
and then
i will
um
for my
final action
force fang
the mage
as i just
reach over
and just
a small
little
shard
so it was
double move
to get here
was it a
no no
it was a
single move
oh yeah
yeah because
you get the
extra
yeah because
you're hasted
yeah of course
yeah yeah
yeah so
single move
spell strike
and then i
force
then yeah
yeah yeah
yeah
haste actually
yeah cool
cool
so i'm gonna
uh
force fang
it's just a
shard of reality
just rips
right for her
not a big one
but you know
pretty good
okay
she's not
looking good
as the
the like
the force
just strikes
into her
hey first
i have a
question actually
yes
so she was
here right
she was like
right there
before
yeah right
here
would there
be like
enough of a
cliff for
her to like
make some
kind of
check to
not fall
down
into
muck
uh there's
yeah it's
not really
like uh
like uh
you you
knock them
into like
prone
what this
does is it
would mean
like
for her
to move
out
she'd be
like in
a tricky
position
but you
don't just
knock her
down
because that
would be a
separate thing
you'd have
to have
gotcha
wasn't sure
had to be
sure
absolutely
all right
so the guy
who's the
who's now
having his
worst t-rex
day ever
um
god
like
please
begins
to
run
through the
muck
away
just
runs
more
are you
running
more
are you
running
why are
you
running
why are
you
running
why are
you
running
um
okay
so the
little
fire boy
is gonna
go
rum pum pum pum
pum
yeah
fuck you
all right
it
it belches
at you
tanhauser
give me a
fortitude save
sure thing
you either
click the
thing in
chat too
if you
want to
yeah
oh
well that's
just lovely
it is
that's gonna
be a 28
sweet so
that will be
a success
so you'll
just take
half damage
from this
uh so
you will
take one
point of
poison
damage
i wasn't
expecting
point of
damage
from the
man made
out of
fire but
i'll
take it
it's
it's belching
uh toxic
fumes at
you
oh my god
it's turning
into the
guy from
fern gully
tim curry
then it's
going to hit
you with
its flaming
lash
where this
will be
fire damage
oh
okay
okay
oops i
didn't have
you targeted
but whatever
21 i think
misses you
anyway
so
blup
sad
just
okay
uh
that's
the little
filthy
fire
um
disgusting
thing
uh
this one
like
tries to
scrabble
up the
rock
and
then
tries to
shoot at
you
tanhauser
with a
uh
with hand
crossbow
based
i will
hit you
ah
doesn't
have
precision
up
though
because
he did
not
have
enough
time
for
that
so
does
points
of
damage
to
you
as a
like
impacting
bolt
strikes
you
in
your
shoulder
and
then
he
is
just
kind
of
like
standing
there
uh
Rahua
you are
up
absolutely
so
Rahua
actually
i
should
ask
as well
just
want to
make
sure
the
one
who's
running
away
was
that
one
of
the
ones
who
casted
fireball
on
me
no
no
no
the
ones
who
cast
a
fireball
have
the
sort
of
like
masks
these
two
here
well
nobody
likes
a
quitter
so
we're
gonna
hit
him
with
an
arctic
barrage
as
more
swamp
muck
will
manifest
and
hopefully
kill
this
man
no
survivors
no
survivors
there
is
going
to
get
their
buddies
it's
true
i really
love that
all your
roles
are
private
oh
god
damn
it
i turned
it off
well
the good
news is
it was a
28 to
hit
and it's
damage
so as
this man
runs away
you end
his existence
just like
trying to get
home to his
family
and then
rocks
oh
fuck
you
beams
of light
just come
out
and
everyone
who dies
has a
family
we know
you don't
need to
rub it
in our
faces
and we're
coming for
their families
too
yeah
i'm gonna
kill
your son
it's okay
it's okay
the amphipedes
will make
better use
of this
one than
he ever
made of
his own
life
yeah
he's gonna
help
another
family
a family
of
weevils
and
seeing the
imminent
fuckinging
upon me
uh
ruhuo's
like oh
no
who think
i forgot
about
you
big
boy
uh
ruhuo
will interact
with himself
to trigger
vital beacon
and i'll
gain
healing
sweet
we hit him
with a
lost
that's pretty
good
i shall
heal you
that much
bang
there you
go
half-life
medical kit
sound
all right
that's it
for you
that's
40 10
so that
well here
roll
40 10
i'll just
i'll just
damage you
back
and roll
40 10
and roll
worse than
half-life
one jib
sound
come on
please
no
yeah
let's go
there you
go
funny
you got
me
you are
baldrico
baldrick
is
gonna
chase
what do
we got
left
is there
anyone in
the shadow
of the
thing over
here
okay
no
now i
can see
it
okay
because it
was only
showing me
vic's
point of
view
so
if you
have the
token
selected
that's
why
let me
see
i'm
going
to
fly
there
next to
zoran
the bear
the t-rex
zoran
the t-rex
sorry it's
very finicky
and i am
going to
whip up
uh
poison
no not
poison
acid
acid flask
moderate
yeah
and i'm gonna
hurly burly
at that guy
with the plus
10 feet
over his head
because he's
in the tower
right
no no no
i
he left
the tower
i just
forgot to
take it
off
they're all
very epic
i threw
a grenade
okay
very good
very good
die
die
that'll
hit pretty
good for a
that will
hit
uh
what's the
radius on
this it's
just one
next to
it right
uh
yeah it
would be
anyone next
so it's
just gonna
hit him
it's only
a five
foot splash
okay
cool
sizzly
oh wow
yeah it's
that's pretty
good so
he will
take
acid but
they will
also take
the recurring
ass and
the splash
there we go
cool
yep
okay and
with the
other one
i am going
to throw it
at this one
at a map
minus five
yes
spread out
that acid
map minus
five
melt them
in the swamp
melt them
i'm helping
the the
biome
oh nice
another quick
fail
well that
makes three
we're really
getting use
out of them
complications
chat you
should be
thankful i'm
helping you
yeah
go on
thurston
tell me what
i want
and find
the neck
oh
tell me
what i want
i'm i'm
i'm looking
i'm looking
um
no
um
oh
okay
uh
uh
good
yes i will
use this
one
it is
from
yuna
callista
it is
entitled
reeb's
betrayal
oh
nice
uh
when trying
to hit
an enemy
uh
the character
hits a
close-by
ally
instead
congratulations
zoran
the t-rex
the t-rex
all right
please roll
damage
is it because
of the critical
miss is it
critical damage
uh no
no no
no
it'll be
regular
wow same
team
hey it's max
damage anyway
bucko
same
there's
there's the
persistent
and the
splash
damage
very good
the t-rex
just looks
at you
little t-rex
arm
he just
brings him
up like
the fuck
man
baldrick is
going to
is just
going to
shrug and
say you
were invisible
he looks
at you
harder
because he's
not been
invisible for
quite a
while
he's hoping
you don't
notice that
gaslighting
him
gaslight the
team
we'll say
it'll be
gaslit
okay
if i don't
beat it
if i beat
a 10
can't keep
gaslight
grenadier
so true
wow
okay 24
he knows
your bullshit
and he fucking
hates you
now
that's fine
i've made an
enemy of
oran this will
help our
dynamic
true
hey uh
you know
for fun
and you know
parody's sake
hey uh
baldrick can you
give me a
deception check
real quick
oh sure
jokes on you
i actually
have deception
bitch
yeah no the
t-rex sees
through your
lies
that's fine
he can see
through it
all he wants
he was see
through a
minute ago
all right
well the uh
the blaze
agent here
uh seeing
that this
might not be
a tenable
situation
um reload
uh moves
actually
to up the
bridge
then fires
a crossbow
bolts
and reloads
as they
move
ow
okay
i'll crit
you with
the crossbow
bolt
that's
cool
yeah
well who
are you
hitting
a bald
baldrick
sorry
you have
ten hours
a target
oh weird
well
i think
it's still a
crit
it's still
oh it's
because i
have both
of them
targeted
yeah
then i
will
roll
uh
dimash
a year
why
is it
having it
on
i have
bulge
die
apparently
i don't
know
oh it's
i see why
ignore me
uh there
we go
okay
and then
um reloads
with a final
action
and then is
going to
take a
bunch of
persistent
acid
oh yeah
absolutely
uh so
we'll take
that
and then
rolls recovery
and fails
and is still
acided
burn
all right
this uh
this
this
gnoll
here
who's
been
slowly
but surely
making
making their
way up
and just
forgot that
they had
a thing
is going
to cast
a ray
of enfeeblement
on the
t-rex
oh no
he's going
to make
you small
going to
try to
try to
you know
hit
um
attack
make your
fortitude
i miss
by one
oh my god
because the
target has
dinosaur form
uh no
because the
attack misses
actually no
you know
what
no
i'm villain
pointing this
oh you're
using your
resources
i am
villain
still miss
by one
stupid
stupid
stupid
and then
we'll move
down to
there
volley
you're
up
yay
okie
dokie
uh
it's time
to start
sprinting
after
this
elf
oh
victrix
is going
to let
you move
through
her
square
oh yes
thank you
queen
and remember
you are
unimpeded
by anything
because you're
still
freedomed
of movement
yes
indeedy
dandy
so i'm
going to
sprint
sprint
here
please
yeah
the door
is weird
the door
there you go
there we go
um
that's my first
action
second action
i'm going to
uh tumble
through him
i've got the
movement
uh-huh
yeah do it
do it up
can you beat
his amazing
stats
uh knock on wood
don't don't
jinx me
here
that'll be
an excellent
time to roll
a large
number
i would love
to roll
a big
number
that will
be enough
for you
to to
shimmy
and i will
even click
the panache
button
oh thank
you thank
you my
panache
now um
now you
are beside
frost you
are panached
uh actually
is this a good
place for me
to be next
to all these
people no
it fucking
isn't
right here
okay
uh and yeah
i'm gonna finish
with this man
all right
hopefully i can
finish him
i'd like to point
out that thurston
literally just put
you in the swamp
put me in the
muck
hostile game
master
actually no that
was volley
that was volley
that was me
that was me
yep that was
not me
not me
but let's see
can you kill
a french elf
i i i want
to commit so
many crimes
against the french
sorry to our
french view
oh no
let's go
time for you
just to deal
minimum damage
suck like
fucking
one all
around
no you
did a lot
you did a
shit ton
all the
high ways
holy shit
all right
you gotta
you gotta
describe it
now
yeah there
we go
all right
so you
where
where are you
aiming your
strike to
end
prince du
shelf's
life with
55 points
of damage
on the
crit
and making
the target
off balance
and flat
footed
until the
start of
his next
turn
do i
remember
where
do i
remember
where he
stabbed
me
oh yeah
you remember
where was
that through
the stomach
it was it
was close
to the heart
okay
okay so
yeah i'm
just gonna
oh my
cat just
slammed the
door shut
yeah i'm
going to
uh run
up to him
and just
lunge
forward this
flurry of
blue feathers
and snapping
coat and i'm
going to just
plunge my
rapier up to
the hill
through his
heart and i'm
gonna reach into
my back pocket
it as i lean
in really
close and
i'm gonna
hold my
pouch up to
him the
very same
wallet he
had tried to
steal before
and i'm
gonna say
was it
worth it
and you
do this
and withdraw
your blade
and as
that happens
cross to
shelf
blinks
and stares
you in
the eye
you do
not
understand
i am
the
blessed
mr
lord
he
blesses
me
i cannot
die and
he holds
his hands
up and
somehow he's
still standing
what the
fuck
you do
not
understand
we are
the children
of the
blessed
i am
blessed
i cannot
die
you see
i am
i am
and as
that
happens
suddenly
his
his shirt
catches
on fire
and he
looks over
like
what
what
no
and
then
suddenly
his
entire
body
bursts
of flame
and
he
is
entirely
covered
in flames
oh
well
this wouldn't
have happened
if you
stayed on my
crew
screaming
oh
oh that's
bad
as he
stands
before you
oh
i didn't
think this
guy would
have a
second
phase
all right
now everybody
beat his
ass i had
my moment
i had my
moment and
now things
are just
getting really
hot over
here
you hear
you hear
victrix shout
thank you
i'm getting a
little toasty
and you know
i'd really like
to keep my
eyebrows
for this
uh
yeah fuck
this guy
that's my
turn
oh i
have a
let's
let's do
let's do
i got some
song for
this let me
see
let me see
if i can
find it
do your
do your
characters
while you
do the
this one is
going to
basically be
rushing off
with this
um
this spell
caster is like
rushing around to
the back of
the building
running away
attack of
opportunity
oh yeah
that's right
you have the
attack of
opportunity
because you
are cool
because you
are a
fighter
what do i
roll for that
again
sorry
uh just
an attack
roll
just a
strike
full strike
yep
okay
all right
she is
critically hit
you may
give me
john
dimaggio
critical
dimaggio
that's
unnecessary
it's the
same amount
of damage
she is
very gone
she is
she's
dead
you
kill
that
one
she
she
literally
victrix
like
sees her
moving
like
really
quickly
through
the
swamp
and
just
holds
the
glaive
out
and
she
beheads
herself
she
ran
at
my
knife
that is
absolutely
what
happens
oh and
then you
know how it
takes persistent
bleed
um good
good night
um
the spell
caster by the
great t-rex
situation
you know
what
fuck this
asks invisibility
of himself
oh no
ambush
game
game
game
all right
then
the gnoll
that has
been like
making their
way up to
Rahua
Rahua
this gnoll
stares at you
with their
milky eyes
that sort of
weep out
embers
and um
they cast
a spell
they cast
crisis of
faith on
you
assaulting
your
chaotic
faith
with the
purity of
fire that
is clearly
on display by
the screaming
elf who
is like
um
please
give me
a will
save
okay i
will try and
give you a
will save
music
oh it's
because i
have things
targeted still
in weird ways
and yeah
that's if you
always struggle
with targeting
now on the
tracker you'll
see the little
target icons
you can always
yeah i see
that too
you press t
over and
on target
okay
all right but
still you may
give me your
will save
rahua
i'm not very
good
uh it passed
it's a success
though
suck
uh so you
will only take
half dimashio
the rocks just
off screen
quirking his
eyebrow
okay and
that is that
for the uh
the no actually
last will be to
step up
all right
all right
yeah for the
sound like
and now
blazing
prance
blazing prance
is a boss
monster
who has
approximately
one ability
oh
oh no it's
suicide
oh he's
oh no
i'm on the
fire
oh my god
read it out
thurston what
does it do
for the podcast
people
i am on the
fire
roll 1d8 to
determine a
random eligible
square for
prance to
move in
blazing prance
strides in
that direction
up to his
speed and
then stops
he makes a
single flaming
hand strike
against any
creature he
passes by
during this
movement
repeat this
process two
more times
so
he begins
running around
while on
fire
1-2-3
or 5
that's it
for difficult
terrain
1-2
1-2-3
up to
there
actually
sorry
to there
screaming
still in
the
1-2-8
1-2-3
he's just
out there
leaving the
map
he's leaving
okay that's
his action
i mean that's
where the deep
water is so i
guess he's gonna
go put himself
out
i mean that
could be the
narrative
vick is just
like watching him
wander off into
the muck like
it's not really
wandering it's
running well on
fire screaming
it's a it's a
running wander
the point is
she's watching
this happen and
she just turns
back to volley
like
uh
we want to
chase him or
we want to
kill these
guys
honestly i feel
like wiping out
the rest of the
entourage is more
pressing
cool but i do
kind of want to
shoot him in the
back of the head
we'll see where
this goes
let's kill these
fools
pick turn
emerges from
the water
um and
once again
continues their
inspirational bag
piping
oh which
apparently i
clicked panache
for all of
you he gave
you all
panache
yeah as you
all get the
dragon ball
z thing
crashing my
browser
good
no survivors
none
oh yeah
these particle
effects are
fucking up my
browser too
good good
he gave you
all panache
by accident
okay
i like the
production quality
that it brings
but i think i'm
going to get rid
of the special
effects and the
sounds and all
that stuff along
with no longer
doing music and
the thing it's
fucking up my
stuff and
everyone else's
like it was
really nice it's
nice to have
but for people in
future episodes
going why does it
look so flashy
anymore who the
people who make
it great great
products but yeah
really like it's
not working
it's not
it's way too
much
roll 20
i hate roll 20
i know you do but
i'm not you so
or in the t-rex
or
all right
uh i have a
decision to make
i can either go
help you guys with
the duders over
there or continue
onslaught
rahua's got
that guy
i'm just coming
and bite this
gnoll so
while my
flesh is rotting
thanks to
arendil
uh i'm going
to
just move up
once look at
this gnoll and
begin to big
munch
so one by
bam roll the
17 that is a
34 total that is
a crit
yep on that
person's ac
i do a big
i rolled a six
and a three on
my uh on my
d12s which i
rolled two of
if we're a total
with all the
double and i
have deadly as
well uh so
35 points of
damage is
and i will do
so again
with another
jaw attack
mp minus five
just for my
second attack
uh that's a
normal hit
only 26
and i rolled
1d12 for 11
on the die
for 21 total
of damage
just
you eat and
devour the
gnoll
i just like
seeing everyone
else
i swallow it
whole and i
look over to
the next guy
on the bridge
and that's the
end of orrin's
turn
oh and i have
to do a save
because i rolled
max damage
on the acid
thanks
arendil
thanks arendil
same team
i need to roll
my recovery
check
there we go
and i fell
my recovery
checks i'm
selling acid
thanks arendil
uh leave me
uh leave me a
groan you
vociferous
little herbivore
thanks arendil
that's the end
of my turn
leave me alone
you fucking
bird
tanhouser
it's tanhousin
time
oh my god
he's gonna tanhousin
them
so i have a
i have a question
uh thursday
yes
yes
um
our friend here
is invisible
but they're
trudging through
swamp water
under the gaze
of glorious
fire
which means
they're hidden
from you
yes
but it
does mean
that their
footsteps
would create
ripples in
the swamp
could i get
some kind
of role
to try to
identify her
location
regardless
so basically
how this
would work
in this instance
is you
you know
where they are
but you can't
perceive them
so it's just
you would roll
a flat check
whenever you
make a thing
that targets
them
and then
basically
on like
an 11 plus
you hit them
ah
okay
okay
um
in that case
uh
she's gonna be
my main priority
but for now
i'm gonna try
and burst down
the little goblin
here
um
so i'm going
to uh
rack up a spell
strike
uh
i won't true
strike it
wouldn't uh
wouldn't ten
thousand
just use
the seek
action
yeah
you
you could
like
spend an action
to like
pinpoint
where they
are too
as well
yeah
oh okay
uh
in that case
uh
i will
do that
i will spend
an action
to seek
their location
okay
i will spend
another action
to move
towards them
so you have
to make a
perception check
though that's
the oh okay
yeah
my apologies
no you good
you good
apologies
uh 25
okay one check
because it's been
a while since
i've used
the seek
action
i just want to
find what it
is against
i believe
it's their
thingy
dc
but
one moment
i can read
it to you
if you want
or link you
a thing
to make it
easy
yeah
i'm just
uh
i'll read
out
seek
action
for new
people
listening
while you're
finding
yourself
the game
master
attempts a
single
secret
perception
check
which we
don't do
that
which you
you rolled
perception
check for
10 houses
for you
and compares
result
the stealth
dc's to
any undetected
or hidden
creatures in
the area
of the dc
to detect
each object
in the area
blah blah
blah
a creature
you might
detect
might remain
hidden
rather than
becoming
absurd
if you're
using
imprecise
sense
basically
on a
success
if you
are searching
for creatures
any undetected
creature you
succeed
becomes hidden
from you
instead of
undetected
any hidden
creature you
succeed against
becomes observed
by you
so basically
if they beat
the stealth dc
you see them
like you know
where they're at
yeah but there's
a thing here
a creature you
detect might
remain hidden
rather than
becoming observed
if you're using
an imprecise sense
or an effect
like see
invisibility
or like invisibility
that prevents
the subject
from being observed
that's the thing
so you can use
seek would be
good if like
you didn't know
but like
like like again
there wasn't
swamp there
it's still
they're still
hidden
so actually
seek wouldn't
be good
in this
situation
so I'll let
you redo
that um
Danhauser
because in this
case you would
have to use
seek to like
oh like
figure out
where they are
so I can
make the flat
check which
in this case
you don't
have to do
because like
they're trudging
through muck
so you know
where they are
it's just
they're hidden
you would need
something like
yeah true seeing
or something
to like see
exactly where they are
because it
represents you
know
hey I know
generally where
they are
but they're
still fucking
invisible
so yeah
I only accept
three dollar
words when
they are in
conjunction with
revolutionary rhetoric
Thurston
I don't understand
anything you just
told me
I walk up to
the lady
and I'm gonna
hit her
fair
I think I
think I should
take an
AOP
from the
little
fire
monster
if they
happen
nope
they don't
have
AOP
excellent
roll me a
d20
before you
attack
you got
it
or cool
you hit
him
or you
you will
hit
if you
hit
well I'll
take the
hit
of course
I will
definitely
true strike
this one
yeah
and I'm
going to
just
launch back
with another
explosive
okay
okay
I want to
asterisk
this whole
fucking
conversation
we just
had
I want
you to
read that
like
last part
of true
strike
you asshole
yeah
we didn't
do anything
you were
true striking
yeah
yeah
I want
you to
read that
last line
on true
strike
it was
pretty
foolish
of you
to
assume
you can
read
what
you know
you see
you were
all merely
pawns
in my
plan
and
this was
all
calculated
my part
and I
definitely
didn't
forget
what my
fucking
helmet
despite
preparing
it
three times
a day
thank you
for those
of you
who are
listening
on the
podcast
version
the last
line of
true strike
reads
the attack
ignores
circumstance
penalties
to the
attack
roll
and
any
flat
checks
required
due
to the
target
being
concealed
or
hidden
that's
all
I can't
help but
Yoda's
thirst
and you
didn't remember
that either
you didn't
you were
asking if you
could see
you didn't say
true strike
until this
exact moment
it's hard
to tell
who's right
or wrong
so
do the
damage
that
let's
roll
my
second
thing
hey
it's a
crit
I'll
take
very
nice
yeah
all right
so
plus
are they
flat-footed
no
so
plus
two
so
normal
damage
and I
am pumping
in my
max level
shocking
grasp
did you
click the
crit
damage
button
or
yes
okay
and
shocking
grasp
is
critting
so
you
just
damage
and
it's
doubled
yeah
hell yeah
Jesus
fucking
Christ
so
that's
going
to
be
uh
damage
yeah
damage
not
not
you
it's
it's
it automatically
doubles
yeah
oh
is it
auto
doubled
okay
yeah
well
in that
case
uh
you know
that's
still
a lot
it's
quite
dead
she had
there's
nothing
there
we're
kind of
people
visibility
and stuff
they
basically
otherwise
have to
do a
flat check
of 11
and then
yeah
because you
have to
guess
you're
there
but
there's
basically
like
various
how it
works in
this game
is there's
various
stages
so like
the first
thing is
is like
I know
a person
is roughly
in that
area
at that
point
they're
they're
basically
hidden
where you
have to
make
the flat
check
but then
there's
also
the like
unobserved
where you
have no
idea
where they
are
typically
with
invisibility
so like
you can
have a
situation
like we
have here
where they're
invisible
and trudging
through a
swamp
so you
know
you know
roughly
the area
they're in
but when
you go
to attack
them
there's still
the chance
you miss
because you
don't see
them
per strike
if you
have that
you just
ignore the
chance
to miss
them
so this
was a
perfect storm
of all
the abilities
working
great
to fucking
murder
my
one remaining
spellcaster
i would
like to
imagine
that the
seed
is more
or less
you know
she's
trudging
through the
swamp
and all
of a sudden
tanhauser
comes in
with the
lunge
this
his
weapon
coated
in
electricity
smashes
down
she's
invisible
visible
for a
second
then turns
into a
green
goblin
skeleton
and then
dissipates
into ash
very
mars attack
skeleton
yes
yes
mars
attacks
that's
even better
she can
be green
or red
i'll let
you choose
oh
hey
thurston
i realized
something
you didn't
put vic
on the
turn order
again
why is
did vic
get removed
from the
you did
because you
removed the
token
it's fine
i'll just
go now
i will put
you in
right after
tanhauser
okay
cool
there we go
thank you
thank you
i was like
hang on a
second
when does
vic go
oh she
goes now
okay
good
there we
go
okay
go
uh
what targets
are available
i'm nothing
near volley
i'm not going
after fucking
prods he can
do what he
wants
he's gonna
continue rolling
ones and
twos and
just leave
uh
thurston
what's the
thing for a
long jump
again
uh so you
make an
athletics check
and then
depending what
you roll
that's how
far you
can like
jump up
to
okay
okay
i'm gonna
be dumb
thurston
can i
narratively
declare
a maneuver
yeah always
vic is going
to with
her glaive
she's going
to use her
glaive
like a
pole like
you know
the pole
for like
pole jumping
and whatnot
she's going
to use
the bladed
end to
stick into
the corpse
here
instead of
the swamp
and garbage
ground
and she is
going to make
a leaping
strike at
this guy
yeah absolutely
hell yeah
so here we
go i guess
i'll do an
athletics first
right
yep
can i
with the
narrative
declaration
are you
letting me
get a
bonus to
the long
jump
or am
i getting
a bonus
to actually
just hit
this guy
like you
could do
this normally
this isn't
something you
need to
spend a
narrative
declaration
for if
you want
to
narratively
like declare
you want
to do it
and like
get some
bonus
yeah sure
i'll like
give you
like a
plus like
two
circumstances
you come
down
um but
like you
could just
do this
normally
okay in
that case
i'm going
to make
the long
jump
yeah
go
so you
get to
there and
then you
would long
jump which
is 15
feet so
you're still
fine
yep and
now i'm
going to
hit him
with
you're
giving me
a plus
two
on the
two
hit
if you're
spending
if you
want a
narrative
deck
yeah
you know
what she's
got a high
enough strike
i'm not going
to do that
yeah
i'm just
gonna i'm just
gonna hold on
to that it
would be neat
but that's i'm
gonna flavor it
that she did
that and
that'll be how
it does
that
because she
can
usually
crit
on
unusually
high
numbers
like
that
one
but she's
a 35
oh boy
jeez
she
crits a lot
you don't want
to have low
ac it's bad
no you don't
fighters are good
in this game
yeah okay
give me a
give me a critical
shit on this
poor bastard
oh that's a lot
that's 46
what
all right
all right
there you go
uh he staggers
back from the
rock as your
your glaive
like impales
oh
i surrender
i surrender
uh well
you should have
said that to
someone other
than vic
um
moved
jumped
i can still
hit him
oh yeah
that's right
because yeah
you did a
running
yeah
absolutely
i'm uh
map
minus five
do it
up
okay roll
that damage
please
okay
i do not
take quarter
oh my god
he survived
he survives
one hit
point
one hit
point
oh
he has
bleeding
yeah
we'll die
to the
blood
and
that will
be her
move
there you go
i don't
overwhelm my
party does
war crimes
the elemental
the elemental
disappears as
soon as the
spellcaster
is gone
um
oh god
all right
well
full retreat
as far as
this through
the muck
nice
nice
okay
making moves
then uh
then uh
legit rolls
two points
of damage
and falls
down dead
from bleeding
rahua
attack
as as the
as the other
child of the
blades rushes
away from
vic
stumbling
uh blood
coating through
the wound
and then they
fall into the
swamp splashing
uh rahua
rahua is
going to make
a melee
strike against
this gnoll
with the
mossy mace
because my
pick is not
yet where i
need it to
be
here we
go
wow that uh
fucking sucked
yeah
it's also a
private roll
oh my
i keep
forgetting
it's fine
it missed
i can reveal
you got it
it's just
funny
it's just
very funny
there we go
now you're
all privy to
my mistakes
ah look at
that failure
i'm gonna
frame it on
my fridge
no please
don't do
that
what would
you like to
do with
your next
action
huggy
uh we're
gonna do
next
you know i
really didn't
appreciate you
trying to
shake my
faith in
the one
true way
the old
powers of
this world
but please
let me
allow me
to educate
you to
crisis of
faith
oh shit
there you
go
you know
we're having
a cleric
off
this is
naughty
doggy
man
sneeze
number
sneeze
sneeze
i fail
fuck
yes
that's gonna
do so much
damage
what does
crisis of
face
shit
hokie
23 damage
and stupefied
and stupefied
for one
round
you made
them stupid
they are
stupefied
all right
baldric
seep into her
mind
looks around
where's the
where's the fire
where's the fire
where's the
and like the only
like notable fire
aside from the
like dimming
bonfire series
promise in the
distance
uh baldric
you're up
i'm going to
move 25 feet
to get closer
to the guy
running away
and i'm going
to use a grenade
on him
i'm going to
throw alchemist
fires because
i want to do
actual damage
this time
okay
anyway
use a grenade
die
that was yelling
at me
that's pretty good
for a 32 critical
hit
yeah that'll
that'll crit
time to
really explode
32 damage
okay
baldric is just
casting a guy
who's like
trying to
like
who's melting
and on fire
he's just
pelting him
with bombs
i'm melting
and it feels
like i'm on fire
thanks baldric
bitch
i'm gonna blow
him up
oh wait
yeah that's right
you have another
one shit
he's gonna
oh god
you hit
yes
i blow him
up
he's
quite
dead
he's just
chasing him
throwing bombs
at him
like
oh my gosh
all right
um i have a lot
of dead tokens
on here
so that's
we kind of
mopped the floor
with these
guys
sorry
it'll occasionally
roll dice
for people
who have persistent
effects
but are still
dead
that sucks
persistent effects
yeah
bitch
all right
uh yeah
we're we're
looking we're looking
pretty gucci here
we're looking pretty
good i see that my
friend
hey for who
you want to spare
that gnoll
not particularly
i mean they're the
only one that's left
is he struggling at all
against this gnoll
well this gnoll is now
questioning its entire
belief system
i guess we can go kill
prontz
well prontz might make
his way back if he rolls
particularly well
unless he rolls a bunch of
ones and twos again
he leaves the map
i i'm very tempted
to just kind of
try to shove him
into the deep water
and see what happens
there
it would be pretty
funny if he just
kind of drowned
off screen
he might he might
enter the deep water
of his own accord
his combat was
rather intense
anyway here's some
art i drew of
prontz du shelf
dying in a glue trap
all right hang on
who's next
all right fan artists
we need prontz du
shelf dying
in a glue trap
it's molly
he dies
completely
in the ignominy
of death
okay um
yeah i
honest to god
there's not really
a ton that i uh
can do here
besides just
i'm going to
move here
uh and then
i'm going to
line up
two shots
against prontz du
shelf
uh because i do not
feel like chasing him
through the guck
um
yeah i'll i'll i'll
leave the gnoll for
rahua to uh
fucking destroy
all right
all right let's uh
let's do it to it
did i whiff
that was that was what
that noise
i whiffed
you whiffed
my goodness gracious
grimsby
oh it's because i have
a range penalty
yeah
you do have a hero
point
i do have a hero
point but i don't
know if it's worth it
for fucking prontz du
shelf on fire
i'm just gonna take a
second shot
can we just we just
like watch him to see
what he does we've won
the battle we can
literally just watch
him
we can just watch
i'll i'll fire off
another warning shot
why not
yeah
another whiff
hey come back
i started getting a
man who's on fire
screaming and running
volley turning into
into willy wonka for
a moment stop don't
come back
yeah just kind of like
bang bang
all right guys
do you think they
have any good stuff
here i think we
should take their
stuff
i'm gonna go back
into the house and
look for some stuff
running into the
swamp as fast as the
gnoll can away from
rahua
rahua
all right
blazing prontz du
shelf
do your magical
attack of running
seven oh he's
coming back
runs up into the
building it's the
side of the building
no he's gonna burn
the house down
is the building
god damn it he runs
into the wall
into the wall
like trying to
smile
please make it
to stop
okay and then
how long before he
does
and then runs
oh he's not taking
damage during this
he's not taking
damage
he's just cursed
just lie down
you're surrounded by
water
picturn
picturn's like
looks to volley
like uh what do
i do do you have
anything that can
push him a great
distance
no i
no no okay
no no no
he's going to cast
nondescript magical
munition
i have a i have a
thing but i don't
know if it's
i don't know if i
should do it it
seems real mean
about it
oh okay well i
mean it would it
be funny
i'm just gonna
click this cast
spell option
blister the
invective
a heap of
insults and
invective spew
from your mouth
words so
devastating your
foes burn
from the
intensity of
your
d-tribble
your words
steal 2d6
persistent fire
damage and the
target must
take the will
save if the
target doesn't
understand the
language or you're
not speaking a
language it gives
a plus four
circumstance bonus
and on the
success yeah
roast his ass
yeah he's he's
not taking damage
from fire it's the
ratio spell
it literally is
oh plus ratio
plus you're bald
plus you're
underscore
wow you can't
even die to
fire good
fast my
brother spit
your shit
indeed
i'm sorry
hearing that
in the
voice was like
a fucking
gut punt
how is he
succeeding
a will save
why did you
give burning
prompts a
will save
he's too
he's too
busy screaming
from the
fire to
notice
can i
can i
free action
hand pick turn
one of my
guns
just
there we go
see if you
can take
a shot
i never
used a
gun
before
i like
the
i want
that scene
painted
of volley
teaching
picture
how to
shoot a
gun
going
hey
buddy
here's a
life lesson
okay
just now
aim for
the heart
just
taking
pop shots
like it's
a
like a
dad
with a
kid
at the
range
he's
like
come
on
you
can
hit
him
can't
you
it's
a
live
target
the
best
thing
to
hunt
in
this
world
i have
an
important
question
though
for
orin
is
orin
gonna
like
try
to
stop
this
gnoll
from
getting
that's
a
good
question
orin's
eyes
kind
of
link
up
with
uh
who
is
one
eye
and
when
we
have
a
bonding
bonding
long
distance
moment
as
as
just
from
animal
you
know
like
body
language
kind
of
asking
for
who
I
can
get
it
no
it's
okay
I'm
going
to try
and save
he
nods
and
immediately
begins
to charge
at
yourself
I
would
advise
against
biting
him
you're
back to
experience
the effect
of fresh
pizza
I have
reach
technically
right
because I'm
a large
creature
word
wrong
laugh
at
him
I
have
speech
problems
as a
child
fuck
off
anyway
do I
have
reach
yes
yes
can I
hit
him
from
here
or
I
assume
yes
sure
cool
but I
will
I
will
bite
the
no
no
I
have
a
tail
attack
I'm
gonna
beat
him
down
and
try
to
pull
out
the
flames
okay
reach
the
I
hit
I
hit
into
points
of
damage
just
why
did
you
give
him
so
much
health
you
hit
him
and
for
a
moment
the
flames
goes
thank
you
and
then
it
ignites
again
that's
all
or
can
do
okay
oh
by
the
way
I
take
four
things
of
acid
and
I
do
get
rid
of
it
there
you
go
very
good
don't
make
me
do
it
don't
make
me
do
it
Zoran
Tannhauser
don't
make
me
do
it
oh
god
uh
Tannhauser
will spend
his turn
not being
in the
muck
anymore
okay
for getting
up
what the
hell
is going
on
you're all
standing
on this
fucking
rock
watching
him
it's
like
the
bombing
activity
well
I
suppose
this
is
the
second
best
object
to
us
putting
him
high
upon
a
stage
give
me
a
second
I'm
gonna
reach
into
my
bag
I'm
gonna
throw
caltrops
out
into
the
swath
everyone's
like
oh man
they're
never
fucking
goofy
they're
always
serious
all
the
time
and
then
here
we
are
literally
having
a
family
barbecue
we
beat
the
fuck
up
the
one
elf
we
just
don't
like
between
this
and
invective
I'm
very
happy
that
we're
putting
a
literal
definition
of
insult
to
injury
yes
emphasis
on
the
fucking
insult
all right
urndill
urndill
bee teamer
I mean
victrix
uh
she is
going
to
because
trudging
through
the
water
is
a
waste
of
fucking
time
she's
going
to
make
a
long
jump
over
there
okay
over
to
there
ideally
how
many
long
jumps
can I
make
in a
time
it's
a
two
action
thing
to
do
properly
so
okay
I guess
I'm
gonna
long
jump
over
there
yeah
yeah
I've
got
another
gun
do
you
I mean
it is
funny
I don't
like
those
things
personal
fair
enough
she
she
leaps
leaps
back
over
and
just
lands
like
so
what
the
hell
is
the
plan
with
this
we
just
gonna
sit
here
honestly
I
don't
really
feel like
it's
much
of
a
threat
I'm
okay
with
it
I
don't
mind
watching
someone
wander
around
in
the
water
and
burn
to
death
I'm
cool
with
that
the
problem
is
I
don't
think
he's
burning
to
death
he's
just
burning
it
doesn't
sound
like
he's
having
a
good
time
with
it
she
like
leans
her
glaive
over
and
just
licks
the
blade
a
bit
looks
like
he's
having
fun
though
this
happened
once
to
my
buddy
Mark
how's
he
doing
he
died
in
the
sands
when
oil
burned
for
three
days
I
wasn't
done
yet
I
wanna
point
out
for
time
I
know
I'm
gonna
have
I'm
gonna
have
Vic
try
to
walk
over
there
okay
because
she
wants
to
get
over
there
if
we
had
more
time
I
wanted
Oren
to
not
be
in
dinosaur
for
him
and
chase
the
shelf
with
marshmallow
on
a
stick
I'm
gonna
try
to
have
her
drown
him
wait
this
is
a
boss
encounter
guys
I
feel
like
we're
not
taking
it
very
seriously
what
is
there
to
take
seriously
his
move
is
run
around
and
if
you're
near
him
he
hits
you
he's
on
le
fire
ah
all right
that's
the end
of her
turn
you're
up
okay
you're
up
for the
purposes
of
movement
being
able
to
swim
make
me
move
faster
through
the
muck
yes
good
I
have
swim
speed
due
to
manifested
ornaments
of
adaptable
persona
cool
oh god
you're
like
the
terminator
I
am
gonna
shmove
towards
this
gnoll
I'm
not
targeting
myself
you're
like
gliding
through
the
swamp
like
David
Hasselhoff
just
I'm
just
like
slightly
loviting
like
in
the
muck
just
moving
towards
this
creature
arms
held
out
in
a
Y
like
please
come
back
and
Rahua
will
make
his
way
up
to
this
gnoll
who
I
assume
has
heard
the
muck
parting
as
this
creature
is
just
moving
menacingly
toward
it
yeah
turns
around
like
like
just
like
can't
see
because
of
their
weird
eyes
but
like
knowing
something
is
wrong
and
Rahua
will
bring
his
hands
down
on
this
gnoll's
head
and
just
whisper
into
its
mind
your
faith
is
broken
but
I
can
rebuild
you
you
can
do
so
much
more
in this
world
than
burn
submit
and
I'm
going
to
try
using
intimidation
to
break
this
creature's
faith
and
pacify
it
okay
man
I wish
I had
dominate
person
right now
dark
side
point
um
I
look
forward
to
next
session
where
we
find
out
what
the
fuck
happens
with
that
thing
okay
um
yeah
it
stops
and
just
begins
sobbing
ball
ball
trick
i'm gonna
fly over
to him
and i'm
gonna hit
him with
an unarmed
attack i
guess
punch him
i'm gonna
kick him
i'm gonna kick
him into
the water
there i'm gonna
fucking
thurston can i
kick him to
try and knock
him down
is there a move
i can do to
try and knock
him down
while flying
doing an
arm strike
there's
trip would
be the
action
yeah
like
there's
that
yeah
i don't
have
trip
on my
shit
anywhere
you just
do it
yeah
it's an
axoletic
it's an
exam
okay so
i'm going
to try
to trip
him
okay
versus
his reflex
dc
if you
give him
a reflex
dc
after all
this
i'm gonna
kill you
everyone
has
one
but
he's
on
he's
literally
unable
to do
anything
you're
on
natural
one
you are
oh my
you are
poops
we are
trying
why
baldric
natural
one
hit me
thurston
come on
boy
all those
people
the patreon
god
they never
complicate
today
this one's
for you
patreon
oh
give me a
second
i have to
find one
that's
safe
base
hey
hey
thurston
actually
just to
give the
patreon
complications
a bit
of a
reprieve
can i
complicate
myself
i have
an idea
no
no
we
must
use
no
no
no
no
no
they
pay for
no
i'm
putting that
down
no
all right
fine
fuck you
then
kill
zorn
immediately
well i
will
i mean
wait
no
um
god damn
it
we've used
a lot
of safe
ones
actually
um
okay
yeah
well
they all
request
everyone
wants to
put a
complication
please don't
make it
character
specific
there are a
few times
i had it
in the past
and i was
like well
if tanhauser
does this
i'm like
nope
i immediately
just take
it out
so yeah
don't uh
don't make it
character specific
yeah that just
that just makes
it
problematic
uh
problem
uh
this one
could work
uh
nope
uh
no
uh
i love
i love
some of
your
your
things
y'all
um
oram
looks
to tanhauser
that is
right
my friend
he goes
tries to fist
bump
with his
little t-rex
hand
i will
push
i love
chat
coming to
hello
chat
coming to
my defense
on this
but it's
fine
it's like
it's fine
yeah
there's a
reason
like it'd be
very unfair
it is the
patreon
subscriber saying
it but that's
you know
whatever
i recall
there's a fan
art where
it was with
mouse oran
jumping up and
giving tanhauser a
fist bump and
now it's the
inverse
that's true
oh my god
the circle is
complete
the circle of
lies
uh
god
so many of
these save
ones you can't
make them so
specific y'all i
love your faces but
oh my god
yeah it's gonna be
broad
i had to get i
had to uh
ignore something
which were just
like we bring
like the warhams
kaz i'm like
no it's like
stop
like
it's to
it's to
encourage
i'm gonna
listen to
virtual
insanity
yeah
if you can't
find one i am
okay with chat
suggesting something
and you take from
there if you can't
find one that
works
yeah there's just
like a lot of the
save ones are just
oh wait
okay sure let's go
with this one from
gc rust
it's a it's it'll
it'll work
um
it is entitled
flashbang
the players
attempt at mitigating
whatever circumstances
force them um
to do this is
instead resulted
in a hereto
undetected and
unknown flashbang
going off
and you are
stunned
briefly as like
you you go through
and one of your
alchemical items
goes off kind of
stunning you in
place right in
front of the
burning prostitute
shelf
okay
all right
qgc rust
uh and then
volley
all right uh
well i guess
it's time to
end this i guess
i'm going to
i'm trying
freedom of movement
freely move
uh here
uh i'm going to
faint to get
some panache
yep
uh so
deception
on this
this burning
man
a 30
yes
is he
okay he is
fainted
he is fainted
give me the
panache
if anyone was
curious my idea
was just gonna be
like vic pulls him
into the pulls
baldric from the
air into the
water
that's just
drowning him
all right
she's just like
stop flying
asshole and
throws him in the
water
that's a critical
shit
critting him
again
all right
nice
yeah fuck this
guy
very nice
last
46 points
of damage
very good
how is that
all that
that
what
that was
46 points
of damage
all right
all right
if mr
lord is in
the area
i'd like to
have a couple
of words
with you
this is just
too much
sir
this is
too much
that the end
of your go
volley
yes
okay
wait
the noel
will sob
all right
now
process
is gonna go
wait wait
i have
an important
question
yes
so the target's
made off balance
by the attack
becoming flat
footed
yes
oh wait
that's not
prone
never mind
okay
i was gonna
ask if he
started drowning
you know
that might
take less
time if
we just
drown him
i'm trying
to do
that
oh i love
it okay
attack of
opportunity
uh yes
and then he
will make an
attack against
baldrick
you and
you uh
okay uh
so attack of
opportunity
first
okay i'm gonna
hit him with the
glaive here we go
hit him with the
hits
yep
give me damage
pretty good
it's 19
cool
so he begins
like screaming
and waving
and then he
makes attacks
with his like
flaming fists
as he like
he's just
it's so
painful
and his arms
just go out
and uh
start striking
at people
so against
baldrick
he's flailing
he's flailing
he rolled
natural one
natural one
oh wait i have
a thing
uh that's not
against it has
to be against
you though
oh it has to
be against me
yes indeed
yes indeed
then against
vic
misses
and finally
against oran
here comes the
crate
nope
oh never mind
hearing the
three whip
sounds
that was the
first uh
round
okay
he continues
running this
time we'll
only
continues trying
to run
through the
the t-rex
but stops
at the t-rex
so he will
first start
and then his
mat resets
for each of
these he will
try to
attack you
oran
i was
laid on my
prophecy
sorry
no
don't worry
he'll be
hitting you
for two
yes
for two
points of
damage
all right
but you
are now
persistently
on fire
oh thanks
so what
happens is
pronce
trying to
get to
cover
like gently
touches
oran on
his snout
and he's
just like
oh
there's a
brief second
and then the
entirety of
oran catches
fire
yes
oh shit
our t-rex
is burning
and then for
the last
one
where does he
run
uh just
into vic
uh but
is left
so that
will target
vic first
the funny
part is
is once
you're in
fire it
really doesn't
matter he's
only doing
like two
points of
damage
oh one
point of
damage
this is a
great way
to end
things
oh and
then on
to
topal
trickle
see
nope
okay
and then
on to
oran
it probably
won't even
matter
as he's
screaming
flailing
desperately
trying to
okay good
screaming
this is the
boss
monster
picture
please just
have him
skip so
we can
finish
this
this
is
this
is
very
sad
drop one
of those
essence
thingies
nice
what the
fuck
oh no
he turns
about to
drop some
acid
yeah
he shoots
a magic
missile
no
you can't
say that
no
that's
bronze
okay
excellent
oran
here
go
attack
this is
the kind
of
yeah
we're just
hitting a
guy
i love
how you
all got
close to
him
he's just
running
around
screaming
i'll go
for
i'll go
for the
good
all three
attack
drop a
cottage
on him
all right
first roll
all right
edgar now
drop a
train on
him
i roll
the four
that's a
normal hit
that does
uh
i'll roll
10 on my
d12 that's
19 points
of damage
i'm gonna
try to
bite again
hey
that is a
19 on the
roll so that
is a critical
hit even
though
mp
minus 5
do critical
damage
uh that
is a
six out of
five of
my d12s
i also have
deadly
so that's
total of
and i will
try to mp
minus 10
on the last
jaw attack
and uh
that does
hit a roll
of 16
even minus 10
that'll be a
22 total
do damage
and uh
10 on
the d12
plus 9
piercing
is 19
points of
damage
all right
i'll soften
them up
for you
my turn
oh why
i gotta roll
my uh
persistent fire
damage
what the
fuck
oh it's
because you
got critted
that's right
yeah and i
rolled a natural
wand in my
recovery check
so we're
gonna
continue on
oh no
you're gonna
burn
do you
see
tannhauser
oh say
can you
see
i love that
you're all just
like oh okay
we'll put him
out of his
misery this
is a bad
22 points
of persistent
oh fuck
oh good god
this is
this is
horrifying
stop moving
and i'll
kill you
cleanly
uh
uh
you know
what let's
humanely
euthanize
him with
a spell
strike
humanely
euthanize
him
i'll uh
i'll true
strike it
because it's
funny
burning
flailing
all right
i don't need
anything but
i got a critical
you quit him
i'm gonna humanely
do 12 damage
to him
now i'm going
to just reach
out grab
his head
and i'm
going to
give him
the electric
chair
no
humanely
execute
him
humanely
give him
the chair
so as you
hold this
like burning
man
um
and like
channel
electricity
there is
like a
brief
brief moment
where the
electric that's
arcing through
your weapon
and onto
him
um
causes the
flames to
peter out
and dissipate
and he
stares at
you like
oh
le thank
and then
his head
explodes
ah
well
like i really
was a douche
he was a douche
elf
rest in fucking
piss
and i spit on him
vick is trying to
submerge his corpse
yeah i will just
assume you get
the fire
are we done
all right
everyone
we will call it
for today
phase three
phase three
phase three
phase three
all right
time to be here
for three miles
this one
he has twice as
much health
it moves
twice as
slowly
and he does
half the
damage
look i just
wanted a boss
fight where
it was like
you're like
oh shit
it's got a
boss token
this is gonna
be the worst
thing ever
and it's just
a guy running
around
i appreciate
your desire
to stay true
to the soul's
inspiration
by making
duchef
pinwheel
yes
thank you
all so much
for coming
to join us
today
i hope you
guys enjoyed
this episode
of rockgrime
just remember
the amazing
players who
who bring
rockgrime
to you
starting off
with odoroshi
hi hello
i'm odo
i was playing
valli the
sylph swashbuckler
and uh
yeah
that was
uh
explosive
that was
fiery
that was
um
somebody think
of another
pun for me
combustible
that's not
a pun
yeah
you
you got
it
that was
hot
thank you
next up
we have
hulky crow
that's me
i
hulky crow
i played
rahua
the kanrasu
cleric
and converter
to the cause
you can find
me at the
usual places
discord
twitter
uh
wish a little
happy birthday
to my partner
because her
birthday's
tomorrow
happy birthday
you will win
and of course
like so we have
erendel
hello i'm erendel
you can find me at
twitter at erendelio
this has actually been
an extremely fun session
i wish we could do
more like this one
if we don't do any
more like it i'll cry
but yeah this was fun
you can meet me on
twitter and basically
nowhere else for the
moment
you know unless
something else happens
i'll figure it out
at that point
but you know
yeah you can see me
on the discord too
hi
yeah
so next time we
have speaker d
i'm speaker d
i make the rules
and you can find me
at super snake kick
on twitter
you can also find me
and erendel's
various creations
on
alpha abuse's channels
as we work together
as ogre popenang
including
the upcoming
half-life
zero viscosity
so that's gonna be
real exciting
you're not gonna
want to miss it
yes
and thank you to
thirst and all
lustrous game masters
uh hi
it's me
it's there's not
called gm
you can find me
on all the things
at uncalled gm
i don't know
i might
i'm probably streaming
a pf2 game on my
twitch at some point
or i don't know
playing dwarves with
hats because that
seems fun
uh otherwise
i just wanna
give a big shout out
to our players
for today
they actually had
like a really good
plan coming in
um i designed
this encounter
so that if they
just tried to
trudge through
the swamp on their
own they would
kind of get
overwhelmed and
fucked and they
uh they actually
handled this very
well so congrats
to them
um i look forward
to uh us moving
into what will be
the end portion
of our second
adventure and uh
the end of the
swamp arc
and i have been
i have been your
host and your
strict steward
today hope
everyone had a
good time
we'll see everyone
next time
so long
farewell
and we'll see you
next episode
in about two weeks
goodbye
bye
bye
bye
bye
the fire
the fire
the fire
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
Thank you.