"First Be Reconciled to Your Brother” | Matthew 5:21–26

Show Notes

Episode 734: 
In this episode, we explore Matthew 5:21-26, where Jesus addresses the issue of anger and its consequences. We unpack the idea that even harboring anger towards someone can lead to judgment, and how our words can escalate situations from mere frustration to serious character assassination. I share personal anecdotes about my own struggles with anger, particularly in situations involving travel and customer service, illustrating how easily our emotions can get the best of us.

What is The Bible Guys?

Whether you’ve been following Jesus for years or you’re just starting to ask questions, there’s a seat for you here.

Join Jeff and Chris for honest conversations about Scripture, faith, and the everyday stuff we all navigate. With humor, personal stories, and plenty of back-and-forth, The Bible Guys explore what the Bible says and how it connects to your life.

Subscribe, bring your questions, and get to know the Bible one conversation at a time. Head over to TheBibleGuys.com for more information!

You're listening to The Bible Guys, a podcast where a couple of friends talk about the Bible in fun, in practical ways. Well, we are back with The Bible Guys, Platinum edition. Wesley Woods is in the house. I'm Jeff Forster, and we are so glad that we get to be with you today. And this one is a big one because we're talking about being reconciled with our brother right, and sometimes this whole week we're talking about relationships. We're talking about the importance of being connected to one another as humans and as brothers and sisters and those things. And so along those lines, I just thought, you know, Wesley, you know this is true. And our listeners, our long time listeners, know how important it is for us to bring the finest news, yes to our listen, the highest quality. We scour the internet or at least one website, yeah, the Babylon b to find the most authoritative and helpful news. Sometimes it's not sometimes it's a special interesting yeah, and sometimes it's just about humanity in general. And so today we thought the Babylon Bie, if you don't know, is a parody website, and today's headline is Man's Christian love for humanity shattered by trip to the airport. And this is kind of in our life segment right lifestyle So Chicago, Illinois, the world around a local man seemed to grow even colder and dimmer as he expressed feeling that his Christian love for humanity had been shattered after he took a trip to the airport. Traveler Ryan Canter said he felt good about the world and mankind in general just prior to leaving the house for his trip to Florida. Upon arriving at O'Hare Airport, every shred of hope he had felt vanished within moments, leaving him despondent about the state of human society. May God's wrath rain down upon every one of you. Canter was heard muttering as he made his way through the terminal. What a wretched world this is? Look at the human refuse littered around me. Where am I? How have we fallen so far? We used to be a real country. Dear Lord, have mercy upon us. Oh sweet Moses, here's the TSA checkpoint. He hasn't even made its cant then proceeded endure the horrifying ordeal of airport security. I can't describe the things I saw there, He later recounted, bodies stacked upon bodies, diseases, violence exposed toes everywhere. Why would a loving god allow things like this to exist? Why? Why? Witnesses reported last seeing Canter visibly seething with hatred toward all of humankind after finding his place in a middle seat between two morbidly obese passengers. At publishing time, Canter's faith had reportedly been restored after the in flight movie. Options included the extended editions of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Well, I don't have much to say about that one. I lived that one. Yeah, you know, I'll. Do probably this year at airports all the time, probably two hundred and fifty three hundred thousand miles this year. Yeah. And the entire airport experience from start to finish is always miserable for me. It just it just and it's little things. It's nothing big. It's just that you do it so often. Every little thing just keeps stacking up, stacking up, steake, and I have to work so hard at keeping a good app I. Remember the one time I was with you when we were going to Africa. Yeah, lady would not let us on the plane. I know, that was hilarious. What was this about? Man? And then and then on that trip, is that the one I got stopped and my bags got searched like every single time bags I was randomly selected, right, it was ridiculous. Oh you know what else happened on that trip? So on the way home, remember my daughter went with us. Yeah, so we were in Togo. On the way home, my daughter started bugging me about, Dad, once you come back and say, because I had some premium seats, I got like a free upgrade. Yea, so I'm flying all the time. I got free upgrade to some premium seats. And then you and Jenna, my daughter, were sitting further back in the night. And so then Jenna's like, Dad, why don't you come sick, give Wesley your nice seat and you come back and sit with me. And it had already been kind of a miserable trip. I was sick, rememberah sick on that trip, So just miserable. But you know, I love my daughter, and I said. Make sure you get your meat cooked well done. Yeah, when you're in Togo. So uh, so I I go back and I sit down. I decided to do that, so I gave you my good seat, and not three minutes after I give you my good seat, they congratulations, mister Fort, you just got upgraded the business class. Yeah, so you rode in business class for eight hours and I'm sitting in that stupid middle seat. I remember stepping onto the plane, turning the corner and it was like. The angels, there's a glow from heaven. The angels are singing. You have your own little cubicle with a TV. It reclines into a bed. You get an imass, and. They put a crown on their head. I'm like, i could never travel any other way, but this, Yeah, that was amazing. I remember when I woke up, I hit missed dinner, because you know how your internal clock is all off when you're doing like international travel, so I think I fell asleep. When I woke up, dinner had been served, and I'm like, oh man, I missed it. The guy comes over, mister Woods, would you like your dinner now? Yes, yes I would. So they put a tablecloth on. It, put it on for you. So they put the tablecloth on. I'm like, I'm never traveling any other way than. They bring you a hot towel your hands it's fabulous. Yeah. So afterwards, I sit down in my seat after they said congratulations, yes, of course you got a great business class, and I just look, can you get this big, big, heavy look on your face? And Jenna's like, just tell Wesley you changed your mind. I said, I can't change my mind now because I gave you my seat. And then that seat got upgraded. Yeah that was good. Yeah. So I sat back in the cattle car while you're sitting up there in luxury. It was nice up there. So this one really hits home for me. So I can't I can't express any any thoughts about that, but it is the little things. So it does cause me to sometimes hate people. Yeah, I would say that. I just I'm not a very good Christian in the airport, Like, like, here's what I hope God does. I hope God puts like a ConA protection and forgiveness over every. Airport in the world. Serious, And when I go in there, I just I lose my Christianity for a little while. I'm barely a Christian while I'm in that airport. Then then when we land and I get home, I'm like, Okay, I want to be a good Christian again. But for a little while, I'm like, just like that guy, God send judgment on these horrible humans. Terr experience. So it is funny. I will say, I'm not normally an angry person. I can get provoked and I get there quickly. But when I'm driving, bad customer service and flying, those are my those are my three areas that I just have this short few and I'm embarrassed by it. Sometimes we don't even have time for this. But the funniest story I think you ever told is when they told you to get out in Jimmy John's. Yeah, that was the best story. Oh they were already tired, overworked, so the manager had left. So Jimmy John's the sandwich store, the thing is freaky fast. Yeah right, that's your slogan. And I'd waited like forty five minutes, so I drove over because I hadn't even delivered yet and didn't even show it left the store. Yeah, So I drove over there and walk in. I was like, hey, I was curious, you know what my sanwich like forty five minutes ago and I just hasn't even left a store yet. And the guy's like, dude, we're not getting to it for another thirty minutes because they're making make it. We had this massive order come in. Yeah, I said, well, there's four of you there, so yeah. He said, well, we've got like twenty something more sandwiches to make for this massive order. I said, right, but if you had one person pull away and just make one sandwich, it'd still be freaky fast for me. And he goes, he points and he says, get out. Yeah, he didn't take my order. Yeah, just get out, and he kicked me out of his store. So sometimes I feel sassy, and the being sassy thing is now the reality is if they just pause one person and made my sandwich in two minutes. Anyways, let's move on talking about anger, Yeah, because I get angry. So this is not normally the favorite segment all of our listeners have. Is what made Chris mad? Yeah, well this is our opportunity to the airport, flying, driving, Jimmy John's not making my sandwich quickly. All those things make me mad. Yeah. So here's what Jesus says about it. And this is where we get into the deep end. Right here in Matthew, chapter five, verse twenty one six says, you have heard that our ancestors were told you must not murder. If you commit murder, you're subject to judgment. But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment. If you call someone an idiot, uh oh, you're in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you're in danger of the fires of hell. So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar, Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God. When you are on the way to court with your adversary, settle your differences quickly. Otherwise your accusing may hand you over to the judge, and who will hand you over to an officer, and you'll be thrown into prison. And if that happens, you surely won't be freeing until you've paid the last penny. So Jesus is talking here about anger and the words we use, and the kind of judgment that comes along with that. So let's talk about that. There you go, what I like in verse twenty two, how Jesus sets this up. It says but I say, and this is Jesus talking if you are even angry, because I think the thought process was I didn't do anything to that person. Yeah. So Jesus is saying that this isn't about an hour ord action. Internally, even if you're angry with someone, you are subject to judgment. And Jesus talks about that in another area of the Bible where he talks about committing adultree in your heart. So not saying you actually went out and did it, but did you commit adultree on the inside, you know, with your thoughts so you're thinking. So I just wanted to highlight that. I think that's really good that Jesus is saying. It's not necessarily the outward action that's the sin or the miss it's you're thinking what you do on the inside. Yeah. So this whole passage Matthew five, six, and seven. I say this every time we get into these these three chapters. This is all the sermon on the mounta. This is the biggest message Jesus preached, and he's really unpacking what. It means to be a follower of Jesus. He's kind of hitting reset a little bit on people's perspective on the difference between religion and really living out your faith in a relationship with Jesus. Right, So this is what he's doing here. And so in these passages when he talks about you've heard that it was said, but I say, like you were talking about the lusting versus you know, physical adultery. Now, most of us would say, hey, there's a difference between those two things. Physically connecting with somebody who's not your spouse is different than having a naughty thought. But what Jesus is. Saying with that, and in this passage when you the words you use really matter, even though you know you're thinking, well, at least I didn't kill somebody. What Jesus is saying is it all always begins in the heart. It begins in the heart first. You don't just suddenly oops, I had adultery and never have any plans for it before. Yes, right, you just People may say that's what happened, But. It's very very rare that you commit murder suddenly. It's that the rage built up, that anger came out. It started inside and then explodes outside. Even if it happened in a sudden amount of time, it did start on the inside. It just wasn't like what happened, My hand just killed that guy? Right that it happened on the inside, it happened in your heart. It happened in your mind, and that led to So what Jesus is saying is, man, you've got to be understanding the battle is in your mind. And this is why in Romans chapter twelve it says, let God renew your mind, change your mind. Let him make you a new person by changing the way you think. Is in Romans chapter twelve, verse two. And so how we think will lead to how we feel. How we feel will lead to what we do. And so this is what he's talking about here, So let's talk about it, because he's pretty precise here talking about I say, if you're angry with someone, right, and in some manuscripts it will say angry without a cause. So it's not saying you shouldn't be angry about somebody abusing children. Obviously we should be angry, right, that's not but without cause. That's what he's talking about. So if you're angry with someone, you're subject to judgment, and that's going to be like a judge in general. And then he says, if you call someone an idiot. You're in danger of being brought before the court. Well, yeah, I probably should be in the court a lot. Yeah, I kind of confessed that earlier about my views of airports and people driving down the road. But when we look at this in the traditional language, that word it was translated here in the NLT as idiot. Yeah, but I think it carries a more harsher connotation. Yeah, almost kind of like you, I don't want to say complete idiot, but you know you are, You're just an utter. Well, the actual the actual word, so this is Aramaic. Jesus uses an Aramaic word here, the actual word, and some of the translations, the literal translations will use it is raka yeah, and raka means you empty headed. Yeah, idiot. Yeah, So it carries. It's like this really mean mean way of just like you know. It's like the ultimate insult kind of Yes. Yeah, there are words today that we culturally don't say the previous generations that you would say to somebody, you're an empty headed idiot. Yeah, our listeners know what words I'm talking about. Yeah, this is what Jesus is saying, and and and it's kind of one of those things you're in danger being brought before the court. So this is a higher level than just judgment, like people are going to be you know, have a negative opinion of character. Now, yeah, this is this is hey, he's ruining mary petition. You're kind of coming up on a on a libel kind of situation. And that's why he says, now you're in danger being brought before the court is if you actively begin to try to ruin somebody's reputation. This is what he's talking about. And then if you curse someone, and that one is if you say fool, which is interesting, and that is the Greek word moros. It's where we get more on from. He has this raka is that way also. But then now he's saying that you know that you're going to be in the dangers of the fires of and it's Guiana is what he's talking about. This it's a place of the dead. It was a a. Dump that perpetually burned outside of Jerusalem. It smelled bad, it was it was just a horrible, horrible place, and there was a certain amount of fear of that that kind of environment. Anyways, and that's what he's saying is there are stages the further you go with your anger and your hatred, the more consequences there's going to be. So I said, one time I was talking from stage and I said something about and some idiot came up and did whatever, and I was just being silly, and man, people came to me and like, oh my goodness, you know you're under judgment from God, you know, And I said, well, I think it was a heart. I was being silly there. I wasn't being I wasn't attacking that person. I was being silly in the thing. So I don't think it's about the letter of the law in this is because it is. He's all talking about the heart here, and the heart is. Eventually, these things they escalate. It goes from a negative feeling to an angry feeling to I wish they were dead feeling too. I'm going to go do something about this. It all builds, and that's the challenge Jesus is making it. So the idea then would be to catch this early, to catch it in its infancy before it grows and develops and metastasizes and gets larger and larger, so you don't get to the point where you're assassinating someone's character or doing something, you know, worse against that person. Yeah. So self control is good. Yeah. At least you didn't actually kill them. Yeah, at least she didn't actually beat them senselessly. Yeah. But Jesus is also saying controlling our thoughts is equally important. Yeah, God, right, And so that's really the application there. And so then I think that let's pivot out of that. This is more a heart issue than it is an action issue. It's not about the specific word, it's about the fact that it escalates, and so do the consequences. Yeah. But then in twenty three he says, if a person, So, if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the temple and you suddenly remember that somebody has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar, go and be reconciled to that person, and then come and offer your. Sacrifice to God. Yeah. So he says, if you were if you realize somebody else has something against you, not if you have something against somebody else. Yeah. So you understand our faith, we tend to make it very personal and very private, like it's only us. Yeah, And God is saying your faith is impacted by your relationships. That's why Jesus said, love God and love people. Yeah, and so if you realize that they have something against you, go be reconciled. Yep. It's hard to be reconciled to God if you're not reconciled to people. Yeah, but sometimes we try that. I think with our own thinking. We think that, you know, we can love God, but then treat our brother wrong. And you know, the Bible talks about that. You know you can't do that. You know, if you say you love God, you need to love your brother because God is in your brother. Yeah. Yeah. So the other day when we were in Matthew eighteen if you miss that one. A couple of episodes ago, we were in Matthew eighteen talking about being proactive in a confronting bad behaviors or bad circumstances between people. And here's another one where Jesus has an expectation that we would confront it. So if you know that somebody has something against you, it's not that you're feeling bitter towards them, but if you know, then he says, go to them and leave your sacrifice. So you're there about ready to make this great sacrifice to God. You are gonna worship God, and then guy says, before you worship me, go fix it with them. And you want to know how important it is. God would rather have you pause your worship of Him and go fix your relationship with that person. But okay, I'm gonna throw a curveball in here, Jeff. There's someone listening that would say, Okay, that's good and fine, but I feel like they started it. Yeah, they caused it. Well that's not to say. They did it, so I should didn't have to go to them. It was them who started this old thing. Yeah, he says, if you remember that somebody has something against you, yeah, so yeah, that is exactly what Jesus is saying. If you remember that somebody else started it, Yeah, you go and try to reconcile it so. They don't have an out. Right, you know, the person doesn't have an out, You can't use that excuse. Yeah, when they come to me, I'll forgive them. Yeah that No, you go to them and let them know you're forgiving them. You be reconciled, and that this reconciliation is important. As a matter of fact. Later on, Paul tells Us in Corinthians. He says that God's given us. Jesus has reconciled us to God, and now he's given us the reconcile. The ministry of reconciliation and reconciliation is always between people, obviously, but it's also between us and God. And so perhaps that person is going to have a very hard time reconciling with God because they still. Haven't reconciled with you. So if you're a person that is bringing worship to God, it doesn't say anything about whether they are a God worship Yeah, but if you're a person who's bringing worship to God, God says, listen, more important, go fix it with them. Maybe that's the thing that's holding them back. I'm coming to God too. So you do it for God's reputation, not just for years. You do it so that others will be reconciled to God, not just to you. That's a big part of this, And so leave your sacrifice there. I don't think anybody instinctively would think there was ever a time when God say that. God would say, pause your worship of me and go fix something with another person. I don't think it's not in me to instinctively understand that that's what God would want. Yeah, that's why Jesus had to say it out, because we wouldn't have ever figured that out on our own. Now, Jeff, I don't even know if we have enough time to cover this, but I want to hit on this verse twenty five. When you are on your way to the court with your adversary, settle your differences quickly. What do you think about Christians being in legal dispute with each other? Oh, and I'm talking about Christians, so not an unbeliever, or these are Christians against Christians. In Corinthians, Paul says we should never go to court. He said, it's a shame on us if we go to court against other Christians. He's not saying don't ever go to court. I mean if you have to have a legal thing resolvedly. But when it comes to moral issues. When it comes to legal issues, he said, you guys should be resolving these things independently of that because it brings a bad reputation on christ when Christians are fighting with Christians. Now, when it comes to. Criminal things, I think we have to you know, people being criminal. But what he's talking about personal things, Hey, you owe me fifty bucks. Yeah, I'm going to sue you kind of thing. There's a dispute over the fence line. Yeah, yeah, with that fence is technically on my property, I'm going to sue you. You know that's right, those kinds of things. Then Jesus said, you just need you need to settle it. Is what he says. Paul says, if you can't settle it between you on these non criminal issues, if you can't settle these things between you, then you need to go to somebody. Surely. As matter of fact, in Corinthians, he says, there's nobody wise among you, among all the believers, there's not. A wise person that you got one person. And remember when we read in Matthew eighteen, Jesus says, whatever that person binds on earth is bound in heaven. So it's possible for you, the two of you, to elected a wise judge and then let that that Christian judge solve this thing for you, right, rather than making it a legal issue and then giving Jesus a black eye publicly, these Christians can't get along because you know the reason why this is important is Jesus said in another place, this is how all men will know that you're my disciples. If you love one another, So our love for one another should get society's attention. But instead, when we're suing each other over property lines and one hundred dollars and you know here and there, one thousand dollars whatever, a little bit of money, it's not a criminal offense. It's just a personal offense, he says. Man, you're bringing such a bad reputation. It's exactly the opposite of the loved one another. And when we read about love in First Corinthians, love keeps no record of wrong. Yeah, right, and so so this is it. Jesus would expect us to figure out how to resolve it before we go to court. Now this is for everybody, not just Christians. This is solve it with your adversary and settle your differences quickly. He said. A little bit of compromise might keep you out of jailah, a little bit of compromise might keep you out of collections court. And a little bit of compromise may save you thousands of dollars in legal fees and feet. Yes, this is the beginning of the idea of a win win solution, right, yep, right. So I was talking with some leaders overseas and they had never heard of the concept of a win win solution. Yeah, and they looked at me like, what are you talking about? So I begin explaining it, and they're like, this is brilliant. So in their culture, it's somebody wins completely and the other one loses. Yeah, that's they And I think we have it a little bit in our culture where we have to win completely and if I give any ground I've lost as opposed to the best win is when we make sure both people win, which means we both have to compromise a little bit to a good win. But then that keeps us out of the more devastating solutions and results. So yeah, it's really powerful. Wesley, I'm glad you brought that up. I'm glad we got into that piece of it. Yeah, I think that's it. Okay, Well, hey, if you know somebody who has something against you, you go solve it today. Attempt it at least. Go make peace today. Be careful with allowing things to escalate from just a bad attitude to actually moving into bad behaviors, all those things that God's concerned about. Your heart first, but then if it's possible, go make peace with the people around you today. And I think you're going to put a smile on Jesus face when you make those attempts. So God bless you and we will see you next time on the Bible. Guys. Yeah,