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Join us on the Disruption Now podcast as we challenge the status quo and advocate for digital equity, ownership, and responsible technology.
Gratitude saved my life more times
than I could recount.
And I say that in the terms
of no matter what
trial or tribulation
I have ever gone through.
Gratitude has always shown light on.
If you believe
we can change the narrative,
if you believe
we can change our communities.
If you believe we can change the outcome,
then we can change the world.
I'm Rob Richardson.
Welcome to disruption. Now.
Welcome to disruption now.
I'm your host and moderator
Rob Richardson.
With me is Rachell DesRochers.
And she's an amazing disruptor.
She is really disrupting
how we need to think about
being, being thankful for what we have
in the Gratitude Collective.
She's really launched that as her
essential purpose to change the way,
women,
see themselves to be able to create power.
That's one thing.
Also, she does a lot in the in the space
when it comes to food and helping,
helping others
use the power of food and collectively
sourcing things here in Cincinnati.
I think she does many other things, events
all across Cincinnati.
And I think now it's expanding
to Cleveland by some other markets.
There's all types of amazing things.
And, I she does all that.
She's also a mom, serial entrepreneur,
many other things.
So she definitely fits the definition
of a disruptor.
Rachell, welcome to the show.
I'm so excited to be here. Hi, Rob.
Good to have you. Good to have you.
So, I'm excited about this conversation.
The follow up on, the mini conversations
we've had and, it's it's exciting for
really to be able to develop,
the relationship with you and just see
the amazing work you're able to do here
and, and people all across
now, the Midwest and in the world, I'm
sure, are seeing the great work
that you're doing.
So, first of all,
you know me. I'm going to Italy.
I believe I'm giving a keynote over there.
Let's go, let's go. Thursday.
Yeah, I might go on the plane with you
because I like you.
I do all right if I have to. Now.
It's good
I live, yes, I work,
I, yeah, serial entrepreneur.
I've been building businesses
here in the region since 2010.
I started it all with the cookie company
Grateful Grahams,
and we distributed
graham crackers across the country.
We sold in,
Whole Foods and Kroger and,
the whole premise of that
was to create a gratitude company
that we made it
and we just talked about it
through a cookie. Right.
And it's like versus being, a cookie
company that talked about gratitude.
We were a gratitude company
that made a cookie.
So I've always led with that.
Let's talk about that
because you got to jump into it.
Let me just say this a little bit because
I want to ask the question around that.
Yeah.
You, the the grateful Grahams,
your company's
call it the Gratitude Collective.
That's the overall branch.
What makes gratitude
so central to everything you do?
And and why is that so important to you?
Gratitude saved my life
more times than I could recount.
And I say that in the terms
of no matter what trial or tribulation
I have ever gone through, gratitude
has always shown light on that
and shown me the whole picture versus
the the picture
that our brain sometimes wants to give us,
which is just like the hardship.
And so,
I was taught gratitude.
I was a kid.
I mean, I remember that
first lesson coming from my dad.
I was the girl that got picked on in
grade school.
And, you know, my dad just was like,
they don't love themselves.
Like, you got to love who you are
and like your unique gifts.
And, like, I think I was like, seven,
like, oh, okay, cool, dad, let's do this.
But that instilled this idea that there's
always good in the world and for whatever
reason, my soul, my heart, my head,
just like, soaked it up like a sponge.
Like I remember
getting in trouble in high school,
because I would pass,
like, gratitude journals around.
All right.
You know, like, so it's just, you know,
I tell people, like,
at this point in my life, like,
it is who I am.
It is for most,
core part of what I believe in.
I also think that
what I love about gratitude
is that it's free and it's accessible.
It doesn't matter what you believe.
Gratitude is like a uniter, right?
I always talk about, like, what I love
about working in food is that no matter
what country you go, like, breaking
bread's always sacred, right?
Like it's universal.
It is.
And so I feel like gratitude
is that universal tool.
Buddha said it's like
one of the highest forms of enlightenment.
Right.
And so we have spiritual teachers
who we can look back
and reflect on them
constantly teaching us that,
the way that our community like, will
reflect is like, oh, well, you know,
I grew up and it was like beat down
our throats of, like you,
you should be grateful
you got to eat all those green beans like,
you know,
and and that's not what gratitude does.
Energetically.
That's not what gratitude does.
Emotionally.
That's not what gratitude does.
The way that I teach it is is so right.
So as you talk about teaching the love,
just go down this
because you talk about gratitude.
And I think I want to just harp on
a point, you said, and finish your point.
Yeah.
Because people it's I think some people
have a hard time in grasping gratitude.
I mean, how you talked about it
is you grasp it at your hardest times.
If I heard you correctly.
Yes. Like, how have you done that?
Then how do you go about like making this
where it's become your identity?
Like, because I, I do think it's,
it's it's great that you have.
But I think many others have struggled
to do that and you teach it.
So getting to that point like, yeah, I'm
talking about a real moment
because like there is,
there is lots to be grateful for always.
There's also, as you said,
trials and tribulations.
I want to really talk about well,
my question is like,
when's the last time that you acknowledged
good clean drinking water.
Oh like
didn't we just hear like
is this Flint Michigan
still like
they're still struggling. Right.
And so like
the thing that is, is that people think
it's something out there in reality
is it's like as simple as the fact
that like I'm sitting in my home right now
and it has heat on,
you know, how fast we move through life.
We don't even acknowledge the fact
that, like, we have water
or we have a fridge full of food
or that we have heat,
or that I have gas in my car,
like we're always thinking
that it has to be this bigger, next
best thing, and we blow through the true
the pieces that like make our day to day
offerings happen.
Right? Right. And so gratitude.
When I talk and teach it is
there's this idea that like
hardship is part of like the
human experience and like there's
not anything wrong with that.
It's what what we choose to do
with that experience.
And gratitude just kind of says,
oh, I'm sorry you're having a bad day.
Like I see you all.
Let me just remind you
that, like, you're warm, right now.
Let me remind you that somebody held
the door open for you this morning.
You know,
somebody brought you a breakfast sandwich.
Like, it's not understanding that.
It's not just this. It's both and.
Right.
Always the and
and we want to stop at this experience
and not allow the and to unfold and like,
oh my God, I'm here for the.
And I am here for the living.
I am here for that experience.
And also I think
now I've been through some tough stuff.
Right.
And I am happier than I even knew
was humanly possible.
Like, I and I.
And it's because of that.
It's because every single day I am
looking around and acknowledging the fact
that, you know, I have a Christmas tree up
and my kids were part of that, or,
look at that's of means so much.
I have shoes on my feet right now, only,
I could cry over the fact that, like,
I'm alive right now, here today,
in this moment, having this experience
like that is so profoundly beautiful.
But that's because Gratitude
Console reminded me, like, I'm here
and I'm alive
and I get to have this experience, right?
Versus like,
oh, sure, I'll do it, whatever.
On to the next thing.
But and part of that is in
entrepreneurship, that's our life too.
That's definitely the life.
But it can also be bullshit, right?
Like no one's too busy to acknowledge
the good.
Great. But how do you make yourself.
I guess my question is this. It's.
I don't disagree,
but you've probably struggled with it
at some point in your life
where you were not as happy
or you're in a state.
What I, what I'm curious about
is because I'm sure there's people
that are listening that are there.
Yeah.
How does one move themself
to be able to see and reflect in a way
where gratitude becomes
your identity versus
focusing on your current suffering,
your circumstance?
Because that is that can't be hard.
Well, it it
it doesn't have to be hard. Okay.
I think that the human egoic brain
doesn't
believe that it could be as this simple.
And so the simplicity is profound
in the practice of gratitude,
in my opinion.
Because that means that in the morning
before you start your day,
or at the end of the day
before you go to bed,
you are literally stopping
or starting in that reflective space.
That means that you're literally asking
yourself the question,
what am I grateful for?
And you are listing out 3 to 5 things
I tell everybody.
If you are a notes app person, cool.
Start a note app.
If you are the girl
or the guy that needs the fancy
pen in the special journal,
go to Joseph Barth.
Find your bookseller, get on him
or whatever you need to do and like.
Order the piece that you need or like.
For me, I write a lot, right?
And so I,
I am now I, I put it a lot in my writing.
Can you give
yourself 30 days of asking that question
and notice how your heart grew?
Maybe 5%, 5% magic? Absolutely.
It is like, you know, and it's not
this has been I've been doing
this practice for over 30 years. Yes.
And you compound that right to your point.
Like if it's 5%, 5% times 12 is 60 times
that times that,
all of a sudden you're 600% stronger.
That intentional moment
of actually acknowledging
that's the power right there in your list
every day, like my list for a year was.
I'm so grateful that I have a cup of warm
tea like that
made the list all the time because, like,
that's that was what I was in I.
But I always took that moment
to acknowledge that simple thing right.
When's the last time
you even acknowledged, like, the breath.
Yeah.
Like there's just so much
that we take for granted.
And I think gratitude brings that back
a little bit into reality of
yes and yes.
And okay
so what's been the like if you can
think of a time in your life personally.
Right.
That's to the extent you're comfortable.
What's a time you failed
or how did or how to challenge
and how did you
how does that make you better stronger,
and more intentional about who Rachell is?
Well, I think the,
the best correlation in this moment
would be to talk about my mom
and her passing.
She died in 2020, and I have a book
coming out called The Morning Light.
And it's that and I
that is that whole thing
is about watching my person die
and how it invigorated me to live.
You know, I am so grateful
that I was here
and I was a witness to that.
I am so grateful that my mom raised
and loved me to the best of her ability.
Not not mine, but hers.
And I love talking about
and distinguishing that.
I think, you know,
I am extremely grateful
that I was loved by her.
I'm grateful that I look around
and there's reminders
in my home,
the sunflower, you know, that, like,
transports me
back to that moment with her.
That was a horrible way.
I mean, she had early onset Alzheimer's.
It was a four plus year, you know,
journey of dying and grieving and,
Rob, it was one of the most
beautiful experiences
because grief and dying is part of life.
And, it expanded in to show me, too,
how closely
grief and gratitude walk together
and how we we.
It's easy to live in that space of grief,
in that space of suffering and
like that poor me, like and I don't want
to live in that space of poor me.
I want to like shadow that and light,
right?
Like, I want to love on that.
And I want to say, it's
okay, you're not alone.
You're going to get through this.
You know, I, you and I even had
that conversation of like the
how we choose suffering
like suffering to heart,
to full human experience.
I tell people all the time, like,
if you have a question like,
I would much rather you shoot me
an email like versus like suffering
in the unknown of like Google
is going to tell you, right?
Like,
like that is what community is about.
It's being being here and it's being able
and willing to offer back.
Oh, I just I
mean, I love that and the suffering
we charge the a couple things with your,
know, the passing of your mother and
and sorry for your for your loss. You.
Thank you.
She is one hell of a woman.
So, I mean, I it's it's
maybe one hell of a one and two.
I can tell you
things are passed down right there.
There. Right.
So what's also passed down, like you said,
and unintentionally,
most of the time is trauma.
That's where we learn
how to hold on to the hold on to suffering
when it's unnecessary
or have these,
you know, these triggers within us.
So I guess, like,
how can we do something we talked about?
How do we,
instead of passing down our trauma,
which we normally do,
how do we pass that our healing for others
in the next generation
to not carry that trauma with us?
Because sometimes we're unaware
of that trauma that we're even carrying?
I'm not a therapist, but, you know,
I think that there's
a lot of tools
that we have that create accessibility.
And I think, you know,
when I have this conversation of
first, it's I think
acknowledging it's acknowledging
that you have something
that's weighing you down and that you want
the story to be different,
like you have to choose to be ready
and willing to tell a different story.
And when you're ready to choose something
different, what tools are then available?
Right.
That's a key part like that.
You said that
I think blocks people a lot, Rachell.
It's because a lot of the times
people don't want to even I,
I constantly
look at what I, what my part was.
I'm not, you know, like in trauma,
not all of it.
Not all of it.
There's a lot of moving parts
and pieces in that.
Right. And,
a question that I consistently ask myself
whether it's in trauma,
whether it's in vision, whether it's in
conversation is what's real,
you know, like understanding
actually what's real.
And that is really important.
And we jump right over that step
and we place blame or we think that
this person was fully in the wrong
and I didn't do anything wrong. And.
I think there's a
there's a lot of things to unpack in that.
And when you say what's real, right.
I love the reason why I like that
is because our brain plays tricks on us.
Yeah, studies that show. Right.
The only thing that's real is right now
the the fully real
that we can totally comprehend
is, is is the right now
this is the realest thing we have
because the future hasn't happened.
So you, you're, you're you're literally
making that up in your brain
and the past and studies show
that people don't remember the past
like they're, they're,
they're like 90% inaccurate
I think studies around that.
Right.
So a lot of the things, even
our most traumatic moments that we think
we remember in specific detail,
the details we don't actually remember.
So we're actually living a simulation
in the past or the future,
unless we choose to stay in the present,
which is what I feel like
your gratitude is about.
Yeah, yeah, I just did a strategy session
with somebody and we were talking
to anxiety and like, anxiety is not it's
lack of presence, right.
Like it's the it's the worry of and
and if you ask yourself what was real
when you're worrying does that help
you get a little clearer there.
You know, when I start to worry,
when I start to think,
I don't know how it's going to get done,
why me?
Why not me? Why her?
What's real?
Yeah.
What's real and what do we.
And what do we allowing ourselves
to, to weigh us down unnecessarily
through our own traumas.
That's been passed down through us and I
and I think it's your that's
why your work is so important.
Specifically I want to shift
to actually talking about what you do
in terms of women. Right.
Power to pursue
and and what that is
and what that journey is.
So I'm grateful grams.
We open incubator Kitchen Collective
I'll just put that quickly.
That's our nonprofit.
It's a shared use commercial kitchen space
for food entrepreneurs.
I've helped over 200 food
startups here in the region.
By the way, what made you get into food?
Like, what was the thing
there before we get up in food?
Food is in my blood.
My great grandfather
started a restaurant in the 40s.
It's where my parents fell in love.
I have very, very,
slight memories of sitting in there.
I grew up in a house of foodies.
My mom always,
there was always.
I always go back to, like, the,
seven fish and, like, a loaf of bread and,
like, what is that?
I can't like the biblical story of,
like, abundance.
Like that.
My mom, that was the way she lived.
I, I also witnessed our house being full
and her feeding people,
no matter where or who they came.
Like,
she just. That's how she loved people.
I always understood that, like, food
is what brings people together.
And so, like, my purpose and, like,
I feel like my purpose on
this planet is to spread the message
a gratitude and build community.
And I when I started working in food,
it's one I was comfortable in it, right?
Like I knew it. I kind of grew up in it.
But we were so focused, a lot
of the stuff so focused on the business,
and I want to focus on the human.
I feel like if you know that
when I talk about the incubator, healthy
people build healthy businesses,
like, how are we actually supporting
the person behind the business?
Because if they're strong and feel
confident
and competent,
they can actually go forward in the work
versus like what we typically do
is just pile it on exactly how to do more.
You got it.
You're not working hard enough.
Like,
and so I really care about the humans.
And I do a bunch of other stuff.
Power to pursue is like,
before you get to Paris,
you know, quickly, Rachell,
like, the food part.
I wanna let you know we have a comment.
We have a lot of common commonality there.
So, yes,
my grandfather was a chef, actually,
and he cooked for,
he cooked for people
during the Great Depression.
And then my mom was inspired by that.
She started a restaurant,
called a taster series.
Yeah,
it was a Caribbean, style restaurant.
And so we got to have your friend
like this cooks back in my family,
you know, on my on my dad's side.
Really good at barbecue because,
you know, the my great grandfather
really kind of mastered how to make ribs.
So if you didn't know, you may not
you may or may not know this, but
like, ribs were something that were giving
the slaves and they weren't very good.
Right.
And they but like,
like black folks often do, we take
what's given to us and make it a delicacy.
And now that's how people get ribs.
That's literally
something that black culture created
that people probably don't know.
But anyway, that's my great.
So anyway, we have that's a long way
of saying like we have cooks on our side.
Yeah.
In my family and we got to have you over
because we definitely share
that commonality of bringing people
together, cooking with that stuff.
So I understand what you're saying
and but like, you're right.
Like, and I, I was in the kitchen today
and, like, I just, I felt so loved,
like the our people are so like,
that's the power of food, right? And,
I did
marketing for a national grocer
for a decade.
And so, like, just seeing all the aspects
of it, there's this Rachel Bucket
where I do some speaking
and consulting and strategy work and,
and then power to pursue and rob power
to pursue.
There's so many facets to the story
now that we're
going into our fourth year
of a conference.
But I was so
part of me was just so tired of going
into these rooms that were being built
for women and walking out
feeling like I wasn't good enough.
Yeah.
This idea that I had to work harder,
I had to buy this course, or
I had to take this pill, or I'm too loud
or I'm too fat, or, like, what?
I mean, what? I've heard it all.
Yeah, well, I've heard every reason
why I don't belong, right?
And I didn't believe that.
And so I was like,
well, I'm not the only one.
And so what if we created a space
that women could come to,
where all of them could show up,
and not just the part that was invited?
Right.
That's real.
Many of them could show up
but not just a part that's invited.
Oh yeah. That's good.
So that's what it is we've created.
I say that power to pursue is a women's
empowerment movement.
And its job is to create a safe space
for women to be seen, heard and loved it.
Yeah.
Because again,
it goes back to that foundation.
What if we had strong foundation
so that we could actually do the thing?
And the thing is entrepreneurial,
corporate being a janitor, being the lunch
lady, being just a stay at home mom,
being a student, like,
I want all of those hats
and titles to come off
because I just want you to know
that you belong and that you are worthy
and that you are loved, and that I'm going
to do everything in my power
to make sure that you feel that way.
If you're coming
into something, I'm building,
what do you
feel men can do to help further
the cause of women's empowerment?
What's the role of men
from your perspective?
You know,
men often do.
Just not enough men, you know?
And I was like, don't bring it on.
No, no, no, no, I here's the truth.
For my for me, from my experience,
I've had more men help me succeed
than I've had a lot of women
because the shift is, is that for women?
We've been told that competition probably,
right, that there's one seat at the table
and she wants your seat.
And so who's going to get the seat?
My take on that is, ladies,
if you never leave home
without your chair,
you don't have to worry about that. Right.
So like, oh, drop the mic till like
if we don't leave home without our chairs,
we always have a seat.
And and yes, we can build a longer table
and we can make a round table
or an, an oval table.
But like reality is
we've got to sit at that table.
Absolutely. You know, and so
being a door opener is really important
no matter if you're a male or female,
if you know somebody that can help
the person that you just talk to,
you have an opportunity.
You can choose in that moment
to take a minute
and send an email to connect to them.
Yeah, right.
I agree with that point
before you get to that,
because I think this is a really because
you cover something really important.
What?
The same thing that you are describing
when it comes to women in the challenge
is the same struggle
that black folks and other, other,
other other groups have that are
that have been traditionally marginalized.
I still go through these both systemic
and also historical
and also psychological struggles
that are, that are,
that are, that are a result
of all those things. Right.
And so, like, I've,
I've had the same struggles, too,
because people like, people think
like there's only a room for two of us.
Like, why that's not I'm
not accepting that narrative.
At the same time, people do play that
narrative like I've had people play,
people play that narrative,
and it's there.
So like,
I think when you get to, you can go there
because I wanna say this very quickly.
I think what the man, what we need to do,
what the first time
we had this conversation
and I think I wanted to have it publicly,
the first time I realized
and had a grasp of the importance
that I played
in terms of women's empowerment.
Because every man does, every man does
because we all have something
which is called privilege.
And that's a
that's a hard word for people to say.
So I wanted to fight it for people
so they understand what I mean.
Privilege is not saying
that you didn't have struggle.
Privileges is about the things
you don't have to go through
simply because of who you are.
You're the color
your skin, or that you're male
or that you're born in America,
for example.
These are privileges that you didn't that
that you don't have to go through that
you should be
grateful for, frankly, because privilege
is not a bad thing in itself.
Christ is only bad if you're
not aware of it and you abuse it, right?
Which and so, like I came
to the realization of having the privilege
when I was in a
gender in law class because,
I'm black, I understand racism
because I've been through it.
I can tell you many stories from police,
anything else and everything else.
Right? I understand it, it does exist.
What people believe is real or not
is completely real.
I don't see it as a limitation,
but it does exist.
Okay, so there's that.
But I didn't really fully appreciate,
my role
in having male privilege until that class
and someone reversed a question on me
to say, well, like, how are you?
How are we responsible for all of this?
This is not that you're responsible.
You just have to just know
and be aware of it.
You know how racism works.
And I'm like,
oh God. Then it clicked for me.
But, so I do see that.
And making sure that men just to say
like their role is to make sure we're not
that we are empowering because we,
we do do things that are probably
not probably that are unconscious
because it's so systemic for us
to overexplain to take an idea of a woman
to be willing to have that conversation.
I think that's it is not coming.
And somebody saying, hey,
you had an opportunity
in what we do in
the human experience is to shut down.
I did wrong, they're wrong.
I can't believe.
And it's like,
wait a second. No, you're right.
I could have just opened the door.
Yeah, exactly. And and so it it
it's not wrong,
but you have an opportunity to change
because it is wrong. Right.
Like it is wrong.
But like it doesn't
mean it's just because.
Not intentional
doesn't mean it's is not right.
How long can we go?
Well, it wasn't intentional.
Like, you know, like that's
that's bullshit now, right.
Like that doesn't work
because that's you just saying
I'm taking the easy way out
because I don't want to do the work.
And I think that's interesting because I
so there is a way for me
and like energetically weight of like
I am so committed to making sure
if I'm saying if I'm standing on this
platform and going,
I'm creating a room for all women,
then by God, I need to make sure
that all women are represented
and and we keep growing and pushing that.
Right. Like and I have
conversations.
It's not black and white women. Right.
Like there is a whole sea of women
out there.
Our stages easily set 45
to 52% in a diverse standpoint.
I'm really proud of that.
Not is highly unusual, by the way.
It's highly unusual.
And people I will say like,
I don't know how you do that like that.
And it's not hard when the intention is
this is the job, right?
And I take that job very seriously.
I also see that reflected back
in our audience.
Our audience sits at a 40% easily diverse,
last year I was at Black Tech Week
and I had two black women come up to me
and they told me how keen
they felt in my room. Rob.
And like, I literally like,
I hold that
compliment so high because, like,
that's the work, right?
Like that means something to me.
It's not that I'm doing it just to do it.
I'm doing it
because I believe that we need it
and that it is accessible to all of us.
Right.
And so I'm going to do everything
in my power
to create that equality
and in the way that I can.
Right.
You know, I made up of it to like you.
I mean, it's
how do you give people advice starter
up to you like, oh, no, no, what it like?
Because there's a lot of people
that struggle with this.
I just said, that's my advice.
Okay.
Thank you.
Yeah.
I mean, you know, the ask.
We are so afraid of asking.
And I think that fear of asking
is probably
because we know what the truth is,
and we don't want to hear it,
or we don't want someone to say, yeah,
I can help you,
because then if they can help you,
then you got to do it.
Yeah.
You know, I've, I've, I went to
other women and I said, this is my vision.
I need to ask you not from
I don't want to whitewash anything.
I don't want it to be white privilege.
I don't want to not do my homework. Right.
Because I think that's a lot of the stuff
that black women, it's
not their job
to tell me how to create space for them.
It's my job. Right.
And so I did that.
I said,
you know, I tell people a lot of the times
my job with power to pursue is mainly
just listening.
Because if I listen,
then I hear what our community is seeking
and the whole community.
Right.
Like there's a common thread here,
and all I want to do is listen and be able
to pull the common thread.
And so you guys, the most one of the most
powerful assets you have is your voice.
And and that voice is the ask.
And so if something's holding you back
not it's not the asset
that's holding you back.
It's actually
your lack of belief in yourself.
The lack of belief that you belong
or that you don't feel worthy or that
you know, I struggled with my size,
or the fact that I didn't
have this degree for years of like,
that's what I was told.
I was told I didn't have
I didn't have what it takes.
And now I'm like,
wait, I don't believe that.
Yeah.
All right.
So like you, because you kind of went back
to what you believe earlier.
So I will have some rapid fire questions.
What aligns with that one?
What advice would you give your younger
self and what advice would you ignore?
Or advice for your younger self?
And I joke all the time Nike
was really on to it, but like just do it.
I think that,
my younger self,
I think a lot of our younger
selves
needs that reminder that we do belong.
And so
however, you find that if it's a mantra,
if it's writing it on a page,
like whatever, but
and then not taking, you know, Rob,
as hard as some of the decisions
I made and the experiences
I went through, everything
was beautiful at the end of it.
So I don't know that
there's anything I would, you know,
don't lie to be a liar,
a lie.
She would ignore.
Yeah.
Everybody that.
The people that don't believe in you.
Yeah.
So ignore all of them. I agree.
I mean,
I'm with you.
I mean, yes, define yourself for yourself.
By yourself.
That's.
Yeah, that's what Mama Richardson says.
What's an important truth
you have that very few people
agree with you on?
So when we were talk,
we talked a little bit about this and I.
And I was like,
oh, that's a stumper for me and you.
Then we started talking
about this idea of suffering,
and you're like, rage,
like you're kind of right.
And I think that it's taking back control
over what you're choosing.
And suffering is something,
you know, like we want to place
blame on all these outside things. And,
I've had some
we call them big T traumas
and little T traumas,
like I've had both.
And it goes back to that asking,
I think, again,
this idea that we're not
we're not in control of it all.
I don't believe that.
That's not what I'm saying.
What I'm saying is, is that
I think we have a lot more participation
in our suffering than we allow to believe.
That's a, that's
a, that's a profound state.
That's definitely a good one.
And I want people to suffer
less everything I've ever built
has to has talked
about the idea
and the ability to choose to suffer less.
And so for me
that's my practice of gratitude.
That's no matter what I've gone through.
It's saying
I'm going to put light on this.
I'm going to shine the light
like it doesn't.
I can't have it this dark.
Yeah. No.
That's good.
You have a committee of three,
living or dead, to advise you on business.
Like I. It's because I'm the worst.
Who are these people? Yeah,
and we show up.
So you love everybody,
but you got to choose three.
That's why you hate it.
Because you know what?
You want it. It's people.
You know what I leave out?
Yeah.
And like, I'm so bad with, like,
who cool people are because I,
like, live in such this bubble of,
it doesn't have to be people,
you know, personally.
It could be.
It could be anybody.
Okay, okay, okay.
And I have these in prep, and I was like,
he's not going to ask me that one.
So I didn't even think about this one.
I joke all the
time that I want to I'm like, goal
of being a roper.
All right.
So like, I think I'd have to invite Oprah
to like how that's,
you know,
a moment with,
you know.
Oh, my God. Look, I'm sorry, you did read.
I'm like,
I'm not going to remember anyone's name.
Do you have another one?
I'll come back to that.
All right, all right. We'll skip that one.
All right.
So we'll just put that in the notes there.
All right.
Let's see what's a personal motto
or life slogan that saved you.
Well, I mean, you know what
I'm grateful for, right?
Like, yeah,
anything's possible.
Yeah.
And what's real like those 3 or 3
that I sit with every single day?
Yeah.
Every single day.
Those questions come into my orbit
somehow.
Yeah.
Well, yeah,
we have a lot to be grateful for.
I know we as a region
have a lot to be grateful for,
that you're here
and looking forward to seeing all that
you build with the Gratitude Collective
and all the differences that you make in
so many people's lives.
And, you know,
thank you for your support of Midwest Con.
I look forward to your practices here.
Yeah, it's been great.
I had so much fun moderating that panel.
Yeah, well,
we're going to do empower her again.
We're going to have you on there again.
So, Rachell,
Dorota, it's been a pleasure as always.
Always great talking to you.
And we're going to have you over
for dinner to deal I'm holding to it.
Thanks so much for
having me. Thanks so much.