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Join feminist coaches Taina Brown and Becky Mollenkamp for casual (and often deep) conversations about business, current events, politics, pop culture, and more. We’re not perfect activists or allies! These are our real-time, messy feminist perspectives on the world around us.
This podcast is for you if you find yourself asking questions like:
• Why is feminism important today?
• What is intersectional feminism?
• Can capitalism be ethical?
• What does liberation mean?
• Equity vs. equality — what's the difference and why does it matter?
• What does a Trump victory mean for my life?
• What is mutual aid?
• How do we engage in collective action?
• Can I find safety in community?
• What's a feminist approach to ... ?
• What's the feminist perspective on ...?
Taina Brown she/hers (00:01.295)
Morning! I feel like my voice sounds kind of... I've got some congestion going on.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:02.42)
Hello.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:08.756)
can't tell, but that doesn't mean Linda's actually, but you sound the same to me.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:09.74)
Okay. Alrighty.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:14.858)
I love it when somebody says like, you don't look well or you don't sound well when you're not. No, but I knew I was like, knew my husband said it too. I knew I was looking, I don't know what that was. But when you're feeling fine and somebody's like, you don't look like you're feeling well. You're like, okay, but I feel fine. What does that mean? Anyway, but you sounded you're saying to me.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:19.563)
I said that to you the other day.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:33.612)
Hahaha!
Okay, all right. So it's the first episode of the new year.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:40.402)
New Year!
Becky Mollenkamp (00:44.17)
Now technically we're still recording this in 2020.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:46.018)
We're recording this on December... what's the date? 12th?
Becky Mollenkamp (00:50.026)
Yeah, you're tell the people? Now they're gonna know just how old it is.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:54.678)
Behind the curtain, behind the curtain. So let's start out with the pressures of the new year, because I feel like that's something. God, I hate that.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:57.194)
Transparency, that's part of our way of showing up as feminists.
Becky Mollenkamp (01:12.87)
New Year's New You!
Yeah, because it's such a marketing cliche that gets used in so any space and you know what I think watching from New Year, New You is a really great tell for something that's deeply oppressive because it is always something that is being made into a problem to make money from you. All the time because I was watching something about
Taina Brown she/hers (01:21.933)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (01:34.294)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (01:41.227)
Yeah, to sell you something.
Becky Mollenkamp (01:46.442)
talking about facelifts or whatever, cosmetic surgery. some, it was some ad for some cream or who knows what that helps women reduce their desire to have cosmetic surgery because it makes their skin look better or whatever. And I thought, it just, I got pissed off because I'm like, your skin is what it is. Like, yes, keep it hydrated, do things to care for. We should care for anything, but like,
Taina Brown she/hers (02:11.039)
You know, take care of it, but like, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (02:15.818)
you're gonna have, it was about wrinkle reduction. And I'm like, you you're gonna get one. That's called gravity and it just happens, right? And it's, it is, it's like gravity. mean, it's caused by kind of like by gravity and weighing down on you. it's, it's fucking normal. Every human who lives long enough, who has the privilege of living long enough has wrinkles. Wrinkles should be a mark of privilege. Like we should look at them like, oh my God.
Taina Brown she/hers (02:19.755)
You're gonna have wrinkles.
Taina Brown she/hers (02:24.09)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (02:33.718)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (02:42.508)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (02:44.658)
I am living long enough to have wrinkles, amazing. But no, we've turned it, we, capitalism, turn it into a problem that it can sell you a solution to, know, a solution to solve, anyway, sell you a solution. And that is that new year, new you stuff to me. It's anywhere where capitalism can find something that's not a problem and turn it into a personal problem that you then pay to solve, whether it's weight or how you look or your
Taina Brown she/hers (02:55.297)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (03:05.416)
make it a problem.
so they can study something, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (03:13.834)
you know, mindset like in all of these personal space, personal development, personal body spaces that new year, new you get thrown around. So and while I say it's fucking stupid and annoying, it also creates pressure. It does get to me like I'm not going to lie and say that as I'm coming in on 52 and having more wrinkles that I don't sometimes look at them and feel some way or living in the world we're living in right now where hyper skinny is back in which
Taina Brown she/hers (03:22.902)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (03:38.497)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (03:42.514)
God. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (03:43.498)
No, I just saw pictures. And like, it's not body judgment. But I don't know if you've seen pictures of Kelly Osbourne lately, but she doesn't, you wouldn't even know that she's Kelly Osbourne, meaning Osbourne's daughter in case you don't know who she is. But they were back on that like, they were one of the first reality shows that Osbourne did. And I think of her, and not great, she's aged, all of that. She's also been public, I think, about doing Ozempic, and that's fine. And she is
Taina Brown she/hers (03:55.642)
Hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:00.908)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (04:13.122)
Rail thin. Like, the reminders of all of the really scary stuff in the 90s that you I endured in our formative years is back. The vengeance. And I can't lie and say that that stuff, you know, I do look at my wrinkles. I do look at my fat. I do look at things and sometimes feel like, and it is a constant battle to not succumb to that pressure.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:18.954)
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:29.547)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:36.268)
It is, it is. I, by the time this airs, because my birthday is at the end of December, I will have, it'll be six days after my birthday. Yeah. I will have just turned 44. And so, and most days I don't feel my age. Actually, now I was talking about this. Yeah. Yeah. Like on the inside, you don't really feel your age. Your body might feel its age. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (04:42.748)
It's six days after your birthday, happy birthday.
Becky Mollenkamp (04:52.68)
Yeah. Nobody feels their age. I've discovered, by the way.
Well, you think 50 or 45 or 40, you think they don't feel a certain way and they don't feel it. It's just another day.
Taina Brown she/hers (05:04.468)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it is, it is. And I was FaceTiming with one of my wife's cousins last night. She's 17 and she calls me her 43 year old bestie. But she was talking about getting older and I was like, actually, she was like, yeah, when I'm older and like.
Becky Mollenkamp (05:23.995)
nice.
Taina Brown she/hers (05:30.763)
When I'm in my 40s, I'm not going to want to be that age. And I'm like, I actually enjoy being in my 40s. Outside of how my body feels sometimes, I feel like the most like myself. But last week, I was laying down on the couch or something, and I noticed some looseness in my neck for the first time. And I was like, oh my god, what's happening here?
Becky Mollenkamp (05:35.882)
The 40s were the best.
Becky Mollenkamp (05:55.306)
I'm developing jowls, right? Like, cause your face starts, it's the, it's gravity and it starts to lay down and like, and I can, like, can see this, like, pretty well. Well, but it starts to happen and you do notice those things that it is hard to not, whether it's the aches and pains, it just come with aging and are frustrating. And it's hard to not get frustrated with your body because it feels like your body is defying you. Like,
Taina Brown she/hers (05:59.492)
Yeah, it starts to, it starts to sad. Yeah.
Suck it, stop doing that, you're freaking me out.
Taina Brown she/hers (06:20.072)
Yeah.
Yeah, it feels like it's turning against you. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (06:24.71)
Yeah, and it's also hard not to look at the things that society tries to tell us are wrong. Because wrinkles don't hurt, by the way. There's a difference between the aches and pains of aging. Those are frustrating on their own for its own reason. And yet they are normal, and we have to learn to accept them. But wrinkles and jowls and loose skin, those things don't hurt. They're just hard to get used to. Because we live in a world where people with means
Taina Brown she/hers (06:32.778)
No.
Taina Brown she/hers (06:41.822)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (06:47.371)
Yeah. No.
Becky Mollenkamp (06:53.724)
will do whatever it takes to get rid of those things. You have somebody who, I mean, I'm not surprised Kelly Osborne looks like she does, because if you look at her mom, who's like, I think nearing 80, has had so much work done. know, again, we all have to make the choices we want to make. think I get why women do it, right? So I don't want to shame people for doing the things, but it is frustrating because it contributes to the rest of us having this pressure in a way to feel like we now have to look a certain way.
Taina Brown she/hers (06:56.072)
Yeah, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (07:05.247)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (07:11.23)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (07:21.386)
Yeah, yeah, I was like when when I noticed like the looseness in my neck, I was like, oh my god, should I should I like, should I be getting extra products? Like should I be paying more attention to what's happening here? Yeah, I'm just like, tighten it up, tighten it up, you know. But then I was like, you know, it's like, it's gonna be like, this is just this is normal. What am I doing? This is normal. And so and I remember when
Becky Mollenkamp (07:24.01)
.
Becky Mollenkamp (07:32.842)
I need to get one of those things to my life. The exercises that I'm sure don't work anymore.
Taina Brown she/hers (07:47.518)
They were doing a lot of promotion for last year for the first part of Wicked, which if you haven't seen it, please do. Both, both, they're stunning. They're so stunning.
Becky Mollenkamp (07:56.488)
second part or the first part? Honestly, it pisses me off that they took what should have just been one movie and made it two to the point where I'm like, I'm not I don't even want to see either.
Taina Brown she/hers (08:06.985)
Well, because have you, it's, plays are long, especially Wicked.
Becky Mollenkamp (08:10.602)
I've seen Wicked, the production, on stage, and it was not two movies worth of time. We didn't have to have an intermission. It's not that long. Listen, have my... Also, Brianna Grande annoys the listener. Yeah, so good.
Taina Brown she/hers (08:17.692)
We'll be, well, stage stuff, this is a different conversation. This is a different conversation, but stage stuff doesn't translate well to movie stuff. So you gotta, you gotta add some zhuzh to the movie, which extends it. And there were, there was original music for the movie. So anyway, anyway, but when they were doing like promotional stuff for the first part, I just remember my wife and I being like, Ariana's so skinny.
Becky Mollenkamp (08:28.234)
Okay, bye.
Sure, sure, Okay.
Becky Mollenkamp (08:46.431)
Very.
Taina Brown she/hers (08:47.21)
Like, what's going on with her? But then, okay, but then here's the thing. She's always been tiny. She's always been super petite. Yeah, yeah, but.
Becky Mollenkamp (08:49.768)
He's always been to her credit. She has always been very small. That's why I brought up Kelly Osborne as somebody who where there's a market difference. And there we're seeing a lot of that.
Taina Brown she/hers (08:59.932)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But then we immediately thought of Chadwick Boseman, who right before he passed, and hardly anyone knew what was going on with him, but he had been losing weight and he had gotten really thin and there was a lot of speculation and criticism about his body and being so thin and then.
Becky Mollenkamp (09:06.132)
But anyway, it's tough.
Becky Mollenkamp (09:11.636)
Mmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (09:15.77)
Right.
Becky Mollenkamp (09:29.503)
Yes.
Taina Brown she/hers (09:29.587)
He passed and I was like, he had cancer.
Becky Mollenkamp (09:32.554)
Again, another reason I use Kelly Osborne as an example, because she is somebody who's also been public about being an ozempic. And again, in the same way Serena Williams is facing all this backlash around ozempic, I'm not here to critique the, there are, if you need to take ozempic, any them, medication, take medication, right? And whatever the side effects of that medication are, I'm not here to judge that. It's more the pressures.
Taina Brown she/hers (09:35.453)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (09:50.45)
Take it, take it.
Taina Brown she/hers (10:00.85)
Yeah, it's the intention, the why behind it.
Becky Mollenkamp (10:01.77)
when there is this like move back towards how skinny can we get and unfortunately some of that means people are taking medication they don't actually need for any reason. I don't believe that some of these women I won't even say names but just some of the famous people we see who are taking ozimthic I find it very hard to believe that they're all diabetic and I also find it very hard to believe that their weights were actually causing health issues right? They just aren't at the
Taina Brown she/hers (10:06.623)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (10:12.873)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (10:28.101)
Yeah, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (10:29.898)
The skinny skinny thing that we are now I went and saw I went to the Tony arrivals once when I was in New York City when the Tonys were going on and so we saw a bunch of celebrities and one of the people I saw was Claire Danes now this was 20 years ago, so she was much younger than she is now. She's not the age as me so she was probably 30 and Claire Danes lovely like I'm not here to judge her body. I'm not here to judge her
Taina Brown she/hers (10:47.467)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (10:54.332)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (10:57.172)
But I will say, seeing her step out of the car, actually, my breath was taken away. Not because I was like, my God, she's gorgeous, because it was like, seeing a human that thin, right? Where you're like, I'm seeing your skeleton. It's like, yeah, I know.
Taina Brown she/hers (11:10.765)
In person, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (11:14.906)
It's, you have a visceral reaction. Like there's like an immediate concern.
Becky Mollenkamp (11:19.646)
where you're like, this can't be okay. And what upsets me is when, and again, she looks fine now. we were just watching the beast in me with her, you know? And by the way, her chin quiver deserves an Oscar. I've never seen somebody who can make their chin quiver like she can. It's like independent from anything else. can, like, how do you, blown away. deserves, exactly. I don't know that she deserves any Oscars or anything, but her chin deserves all the awards.
Taina Brown she/hers (11:22.493)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (11:34.96)
Like, yeah, like on command. It's like she's got a remote control in her pocket or something.
You
Becky Mollenkamp (11:48.746)
But anyway, it's not about her, it's just when that becomes a standard and the pressure that it puts on other women, you feel that you need to look a certain way. And it's both around size of body, shape and size of body, which changes, but with each evolution of it, it creates a new, know, all the people who are getting their BBLs are probably now like, how do I get all this removed? Because now I'm supposed to be as skinny as I can be, right? So all of it is hard. And then it's also around like aging, right?
Taina Brown she/hers (11:57.105)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:04.036)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:09.66)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:17.499)
Yeah, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (12:18.196)
Like we're not supposed to age. I just, again, these are pressures that are put by far and away more on women than on
Taina Brown she/hers (12:27.688)
Yeah, it does happen to men, it's mostly women. A lot of the marketing, I feel like with men, it's less about products, right? And it's more about belonging and acceptance.
Becky Mollenkamp (12:31.802)
much lesser degree. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (12:41.482)
Well, and their aging becomes, you know, like they look dapper, they look regal. Men go, you know, the silver fox, like we don't hear, never hear.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:45.719)
They debonair, they're handsome, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:52.904)
You don't call that, you don't call a woman a silver fox. Actually, when I was in college, there was a female public safety officer who was older and she had like a silver, like, gosh, she was fucking gorgeous. All those college students had such a big rush time, and we were like, there goes the silver fox, like.
Becky Mollenkamp (13:05.35)
I'm- I'm wild!
Becky Mollenkamp (13:10.046)
Yeah, love their, you know, my hair's, my tensile's growing in, it's still not, this is my fully natural hair. Like I haven't dyed my hair in a decade at this point. And it's just slow growing coming out. But I'm actually like, cause when I first started not coloring, I was like, okay, let's bring on the gray. Let's see what it's gonna look like. And now it's been so slow that I'm like, it's gonna take a while before I really have a look. But I'm excited to see what that's gonna be like. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (13:17.147)
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (13:30.276)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (13:33.712)
love my greys. I want more greys. I fucking earned it. Also, reminds me, it makes me feel close to my grandmother. She didn't go full silver or full grey, but she just had these, it literally looked like tinsel streaked through her black hair. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (13:37.022)
That's probably the thing that I'm most comfortable with with aging so far around my body. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (13:46.729)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (13:59.014)
It's like you call it like these like the light will hit it just right you're like,
Taina Brown she/hers (14:03.048)
Yes, yes, and it kind of like sparkles a little bit. Yeah. And I just remember always like wanting to comb her hair and her letting me comb her hair and braid her hair and just play with her hair. And I'm just like, I want her hair. I want my grandmother's hair.
Becky Mollenkamp (14:20.97)
love that you mentioned your grandma because it also makes me think I remember the softness of my grandmother's body. And that was it felt like there was I didn't want my grandma to be like sticks holding me. know, like there's a yeah, there's a softness that when your grandma when my grandma would envelop me in a hug that felt soft, you know, there was softness to that body. And that makes it feel welcoming and warming. And like, you want to nuzzle up with that.
Taina Brown she/hers (14:25.819)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (14:34.075)
Yeah, yeah, like all angles.
Becky Mollenkamp (14:51.036)
You know, and I want to remember that for myself too. Like I'm allowed that. Like why, I love you baby boomers, but I really think you have fucked us up in a lot of ways. They felt like really the first generation that just, for whatever reason, maybe they live longer. I don't know what it is about baby boomers, but they really reject aging in a way that didn't feel like the greatest generation and the generations before didn't. And so I don't know, I want to bring it back.
Taina Brown she/hers (14:55.919)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (15:01.18)
my god, so much.
Taina Brown she/hers (15:15.661)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (15:20.638)
But I know you're talking about New Year, don't wanna just talk about bodies. It's also business pressures.
Taina Brown she/hers (15:24.389)
Yeah, yeah. wonder if, just real quick about Baby Mimers rejecting aging, I wonder if it's partially because there's a sense of their youthfulness being stolen because of war and the Great Depression and things like that.
Becky Mollenkamp (15:28.393)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (15:39.476)
bit.
Becky Mollenkamp (15:44.522)
Well, just to be clear, the Great Depression wouldn't be Baby Boomers. Like, in their only, in the most marginal sense of when they were like, maybe babies. But like, my mom is pretty firmly a Baby Boomer, and she was born in 49. Or 47, 48, whatever. Sorry, Mom, whatever. But I mean, yeah, Baby Boomers, you're talking more the greatest generation that actually leaped through it. Now, Baby Boomers still felt the ripples of it, for sure, from their parents.
Taina Brown she/hers (15:49.218)
What is it? Am I I getting my am I am I doing the math wrong in my head?
Taina Brown she/hers (16:00.803)
Okay, okay.
Hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (16:08.656)
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, the effects, the after effects. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (16:14.442)
And they were maybe coming out of that by the time they were. But yeah, but definitely Vietnam and that their formative years were spent losing friends left and right. And having their own family members having to go. And so that's interesting to think about. would like I don't know if my mom would share that or not, but maybe I'll ask her, what is it about you guys that makes you not want to age in a way that you're like not accepted in the way that your parents accept?
Taina Brown she/hers (16:28.442)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (16:42.532)
Yeah, yeah. think a part of it is also cultural, like, because like, yeah, I think I think in general, whenever if you're listening or watching, whenever y'all hear us talk about like people, like we're talking about our people, the people we're used to being around all the time.
Becky Mollenkamp (16:46.238)
Yeah. for sure. I'm definitely talking about white people. I can't say I'm mad. I just know my experience in this.
Becky Mollenkamp (17:01.514)
I wouldn't I wouldn't want I hope that people know I wouldn't aim to or ever endeavor to speak for Asian people black people and I don't know those experiences so I am always speaking for white people or about white people when I'm talking about my people we have a show by the way in st. Louis that's on public TV like you know like access public access or whatever it's called them yo people them yo people
Taina Brown she/hers (17:11.395)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (17:18.553)
Yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (17:31.474)
and it's hosted by a black man who's much older black man. He wears a crown and he carries a saber and he shows up at local events and whenever you see him you're like, my God, there's the Vimeo people guy. And he comes in, and he goes to a lot of like, North County, East County areas that are more predominantly black often to go to events. But he'll show up at these events that are much more white centric.
And they're just like, they don't know what to do with them because he's always he's interviewing people about like just man on the street kind of interviews because the whole thing is like these people here like them your people then them your people or whatever but the white people don't really know what to do because they'll say something like them your people and the white people are like not sure am I supposed to My husband loves that guy's show so speaking of the you know people then yo people then my
Taina Brown she/hers (18:04.685)
Yeah, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (18:10.607)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (18:18.457)
Like, do I say it? Do I not say it?
Becky Mollenkamp (18:26.826)
I'm talking about my people, not your people. Anyway, now I've lost track of what yours, oh, the differences in aging. I was talking about business real quick though, if we can, because I know we wanna keep these newer. What pressures are you feeling inside of business? So personally, I'm feeling the pressures, a lot of pressures around aging, just, but I don't know if you're feeling some other types of pressures with the new year.
Taina Brown she/hers (18:28.143)
That's hilarious. That's hilarious.
Taina Brown she/hers (18:33.882)
Yeah.
This short, yeah, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (18:49.636)
Yeah, I mean, well, one, you know, just to wrap up personal stuff, one thing I've come to realize through we've we've talked a little bit about this and I've talked about this with like Krishna too and just like how like, like looking at your new year in terms of like your astrological chart. And so like,
Becky Mollenkamp (18:52.158)
Thank
Becky Mollenkamp (19:09.022)
Yes. I love that, because my new year is... I'm in Q2 already, just about.
Taina Brown she/hers (19:12.707)
In the fall. Yeah, exactly, exactly. like, think if you, whether you use astrology as a framework or something else, right? Like, when do you feel most creative, most alive? Like, let that season of the year be your new year. Like, fuck January, time is made up anyway.
Becky Mollenkamp (19:36.532)
Flabs Chung, who's a feminist astrologer, the one who introduced me to this idea, too, your astrological new year. she was talking about the number of people who actually their new year, specifically January 1st, is an incredibly small number. And the number who have just even January is their astrological new year. It's still really small. It's like maybe a 12th of the people or something. That's just not how it is for most people.
Taina Brown she/hers (19:48.609)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (19:55.149)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. So whatever you're like intuitively or physically feeling January 1st, like just fucking lean into that. If it's just, I am also a fall new year. Yeah. So January is not like, that's not my new year. I don't want, even before I started thinking about it that way, like years ago, was like, I, other than getting a new calendar and just kind of thinking, what do I want?
Becky Mollenkamp (20:06.738)
Aren't you more of a all new year also?
Taina Brown she/hers (20:27.908)
Like, how do I want to feel in December about this year? Like, I don't really do a whole lot of New Year's things. Now for my business, it's a bit different because, you know, it's about what other people need. And so...
Becky Mollenkamp (20:34.3)
Interesting.
Yeah.
Well, and we're all responding to a calendar. you have to, to some degree, it's kind of like everything else where it's like, know that time is a construct and you want to get to the doctor's appointment or you're going to end up not getting your appointment. Right. Like, so I get that too, cause my new year is, it's a little bit later than the count, like the school year, but it's closer. It mirrors more closely a school year than the calendar year.
Taina Brown she/hers (20:43.205)
Right.
Yeah.
And you still have to be on time for your doctor's appointment.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:03.479)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (21:04.33)
And so I kind of, January has similar feelings to me as it did when I was in school, which is like, okay, I'm kind of like, I'm settled in. At this point, I'm so into it. I know the systems, I know the process, I know what I gotta do. I'm kind of crushing it. You know, I'm not sick of it yet. Like I'm not ready for that break. I'm just sort of like, yeah, I'm in it. So that's kind I'm already almost into that place of like.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:12.77)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (21:28.074)
I'm just trucking along with my year now. Like I've kinda got my stride and I know my plans and I'm working on them. So it does feel a little weird when there's all of the like, new year, whatever. And I'm like, I guess. Well, that's probably true no matter what. No matter when the new year is. I think that's a definite aging thing too, by the way. It's just like, I get the whole like, same different day, same shit.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:39.937)
Yeah. Yeah, New Year, same old shit.
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:52.631)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (21:57.328)
sort of feeling of adulting that when you're a kid you don't understand.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:58.43)
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, it's the Groundhog Day of-ness, the Groundhog Day-ness of it. Yeah, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (22:09.687)
god, I say that to my husband all the time. Like, I feel like I'm living in Groundhog Day. Like, adulting is Groundhog Day.
Taina Brown she/hers (22:15.33)
Mm-hmm. every day you're doing dishes, every day you're doing laundry, every day you're putting away, every day you're cooking, every day you're running errands, every day you're vacuuming. Like, it's those little, like, details that, of maintenance that are just like...
Becky Mollenkamp (22:19.632)
Every. Day.
Becky Mollenkamp (22:25.13)
Yes, well every time you think didn't I just do these dishes yesterday like can I not
Taina Brown she/hers (22:34.849)
Yeah. Like, why are they in the fucking sink again?
Becky Mollenkamp (22:39.028)
not have a break. And I'm not, that's not big. My husband and I both split. It's not about that. It's just, it's just like, yeah, all this stuff. The laundry, I think is one of the ones that for my husband and I both just like, it's just like, it just doesn't you cause sometimes you want to cry. There are days where I'm almost like, I look at the pile of laundry, I almost want to cry. Where it's just like, it never.
Taina Brown she/hers (22:56.876)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (22:59.56)
This will never end. This will always be my life. And sometimes when you think about that, it's almost too much. it's just like, seriously? forever? This is, this just is there. God, it's depressing.
Taina Brown she/hers (23:00.886)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (23:10.55)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, well, I won't go on that tangent because that's a different conversation.
Becky Mollenkamp (23:16.446)
Well, there's some of that stuff that I feel about business in some ways too, and I don't know if you do too. Like the need to make money, I guess, where it's just like, God, like, can I, like, I just did this. Like, I just had a lunch. I just made this offer. just, I just landed a client. And then you realize like that feeling of like, okay, now I to do it all. Like, there's...
Taina Brown she/hers (23:20.29)
Mmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (23:24.032)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (23:36.841)
Do it all over again, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (23:38.362)
There's not a there's not an endpoint and I guess I know like we all know that but it's also kind of frustrating where sometimes you just like want to win the game but the game of life and there's Right, like there's no winning the game of life and that sounds sort of I don't mean that in a depressive way of like I just want life to be over I just mean like you just there's no endpoint where it feels like so many things that we do there are like I
Taina Brown she/hers (23:47.934)
Mm-hmm. And be done, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (24:06.482)
whatever the things are, can't think of them at the moment. Well, this podcast, yeah, this recording, we'll have a stop and then have an end. Although there's also, guess, the bigger than we get to do it again next week, but I also don't feel like chores. So anyway, I don't know, maybe I'm not making sense, but.
Taina Brown she/hers (24:09.004)
like a vacation or... yeah. yeah.
Yeah, well next week we'll just record again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, okay, so for business, New Year. My mind just went blank, shit.
Becky Mollenkamp (24:31.036)
Well, tell me about your business this year. about business this year. What are you looking forward to? What feels like the pressure? Like what's coming up? Let's just talk 2020.
Taina Brown she/hers (24:41.461)
Yeah. I, yeah, I mean my, my like, so, okay, so let me, let me clarify. So there's, there's two different threads of business, right? There's what we do together, like the Coaches Circle and this podcast. And then there's like my own coaching business. So with my own coaching business, that has kind of been on the back burner, on the shelf, whatever metaphor you want to use.
um, for over a year now. And I've just kind of been focusing on what we've been doing together, but also just like resting and recovering. And so for this, for 2026, I'm diving back into that. Not like full throttle, but, um, but yeah, I have, um, an offer that I'm working on, um, that I'm going to be, I hate the word launch, that I'm going to be
Becky Mollenkamp (25:26.25)
Maybe.
Taina Brown she/hers (25:40.192)
putting out there in February about emotional intelligence and harnessing your emotional intelligence and having a framework of just emotional intelligence through the lens of just being embodied. And so I'm really looking forward to that because that's a topic that I really, really love talking about. And I think it's something that everybody can use, whether you
work for someone else, work for yourself, whatever the case may be. For what we do together, I want to hear what you have to say first.
Becky Mollenkamp (26:20.968)
Well, I'm hoping that 2026 will represent growth because we had a slow start because we intentionally a slow start to the coaches circle, bringing really by invitation, bringing in some folks help us creation. did our first quote unquote launch, which we learned a lot from. I say it was in the, in the idea that we brought in new members? No, but it was really, I think we learned a lot from it. And I think.
Taina Brown she/hers (26:24.669)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (26:33.247)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (26:38.942)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (26:46.462)
There's definitely stuff from it that was good and that we need to repeat. It's just getting more bodies in the room, more humans who are interested that we can have the conversations with. But I think it was great for us to kind of pop that cherry and figure that out together of like, what does that look like? And it was in a way that actually felt pretty fun. Yeah, so in 2026, I'd like to see us do it more.
Taina Brown she/hers (26:53.087)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (27:07.218)
It was fun.
Taina Brown she/hers (27:11.87)
Yeah, agreed. Yes.
Becky Mollenkamp (27:13.674)
practice like to flex muscle, strengthen muscle, and then also hopefully begin to see some more fruits of that labor because I would like to see our space more than double in 2026. We haven't had our even though this is now 2026 as this is released, we actually haven't had our 2026 planning session together yet. So yeah, this is like an early preview of that we haven't talked about this is what we'll be talking about. But so that's my hope is that I would like to see the show that
Taina Brown she/hers (27:20.168)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (27:24.724)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (27:32.849)
It's next week.
Becky Mollenkamp (27:43.144)
The podcast has been unbelievable to me. Just the way we've had this slow, steady, continuous growth in subscriber numbers on YouTube and download numbers across the board, followers and or like whatever the listeners, followers, the people who actually like save our show so that they hear it has been growing across every platform.
Taina Brown she/hers (27:46.366)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (28:02.12)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (28:06.414)
We just lost a subscriber on YouTube. First time we've actually had YouTube numbers go down instead of up. Not that it's a big deal. But it's just been really fun to watch this slow, steady, all year long growth that's been truly organic. Most of it is people just finding us. Because we aren't doing it. You've really slowed down on social media promotion, which is fine. It's not a criticism. But the fact that it continues to find.
Taina Brown she/hers (28:20.521)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (28:26.302)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (28:31.742)
people who need to find us without a lot of that active outreach reminds me also that it's possible when you're doing something that you're excited about, that you believe in, that I hope is quality, you know, that it can happen, right? We just have to, you have to give time and believe in it and show up. And so it also that what we've been doing here is informing some of how I feel about my other business, my side of my business of coaching and just that reminder that I don't have to be on all the places. I don't have to be spent.
that if it's good, people will find it. They'll tell each other. It will, you know, it'll build its audience. So for our shared venture, I want growth for my personal business, which is the podcast collective. And then also the work I do with faith. My own coaching, which is also fairly, I wouldn't say stat, it's stagnant. It's not gone, but there's been no growth. I've just been consistent with the clients I've had. mean, the lovely thing is my clients.
Taina Brown she/hers (29:06.377)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (29:24.679)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (29:29.93)
don't often leave because they just like to stay in community and in work with me. But I haven't been attracting a lot of new clients and that's on me. just haven't been trying. So this year ahead, don't I'm still sitting with some of that. I have a book coming out that's Which speaking of a book, that's another thing that I've proposed to Taina for the messy liberation.
Taina Brown she/hers (29:43.273)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (29:50.545)
Yeah, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (29:52.008)
which is doing a similar. So my book is called Liberate Your Business and it's gonna be about bringing a lot of liberatory ideas to your businesses like a small business owner. And what I've proposed to Taina in which he's noodled on and seems so excited about is doing a similar thing but for coaching specifically. So it works with the coaches circle, like how do you liberate your coaching business? So that is something I think in 2026 I hope we explore. Once I get past the...
Taina Brown she/hers (30:16.852)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (30:18.302)
Busyness of doing this on my own and then I'll have lots to offer for our joint process because I'll know Yeah, I don't know want to see the book sell a hundred copies which is like so small but also not and Honestly if just publishing it that's the goal secondary goal
Taina Brown she/hers (30:23.327)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (30:38.268)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (30:40.202)
Like that's my good goal. My better goal would if I sold 100 copies. And my best goal, like what feels not even possible to me is selling like 500 copies. Because that would mean it was going beyond just people I know, right? It's beyond my network. I think I could sell 100 copies just based on my network. 500? That's like, that's a different level. And that would be amazing. But also I don't expect it. Yeah, I don't know. That's kind of... And then personally, just for 2026, I want...
Taina Brown she/hers (30:41.873)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (30:51.463)
Yeah, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (31:09.194)
to try and continue to give myself what I need. So can have spaciousness in my life by going to my solo retreats and not feeling that pressure to like, I don't know, like I love spending time with my family, but also allowing my husband and my son more time for themselves and not having the guilt about saying, it's okay, you guys do that and I'll take some time.
Taina Brown she/hers (31:14.194)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (31:36.592)
Yeah,
Becky Mollenkamp (31:37.258)
That's right here. What about you for any other parts of like your personal life and or I don't know you that's deliberation because you're like I want to know what you think so did
Taina Brown she/hers (31:41.702)
Yeah, yeah for the business.
Yeah, yeah. And that, okay, so for what we do together in business for the podcasts, I have, you really are the one who looks at a lot of the stats. I don't look at the stats as much as you do. But I mean, but you're thinking podcasts all the time, because also you have the podcast collective. So that's like always like of mine for you. But so I have been pleased with like how it's just
It feels like a slow blooming flower, right? Like it's just steadily growing. And I love also just like the pace that we have for it, like where there isn't this pressure to like do certain things or show up in a certain way. So I'm excited to just continue doing that. And I'm excited for the Everything is Political series.
Becky Mollenkamp (32:36.413)
Me too,
Taina Brown she/hers (32:38.162)
which we had originally planned to kick off like first thing in the new year, but it's looking like February. We'll see, we'll see, but it'll happen this year for sure. It'll happen this year for sure. So I'm excited for that. And just to talk to different people about what that looks like in different areas of our lives. And so I think that'll be really a really interesting conversation series that we'll be having. For the coaches circle, it was a lot of fun doing the hard launch.
Becky Mollenkamp (32:42.41)
It's annoying, isn't Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (33:08.699)
Like you said.
Becky Mollenkamp (33:09.162)
I bet neither of us had done, well, especially you, because you've been taking a little more time. It's been a while since you've probably really had a, like real launch like that. I mean, I guess I done the summit, so I did, I had done a launch, but beyond that, I hadn't done a lot of launching. So I had two kind of launch moments, bigger ones, and I haven't done a lot of that. So yeah, it's just fun to like flex the muscle again and experiment.
Taina Brown she/hers (33:17.073)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (33:27.335)
This year, yeah, or last year.
Taina Brown she/hers (33:33.521)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, I think it was also fun because it was something that I wasn't doing on my own. Like we were doing it together.
Becky Mollenkamp (33:40.98)
Friend, that has been the biggest lesson of 2025 for me. continuing to do it. I don't wanna do shit alone. Shit alone sucks. I think that's why my coaching business has been a bit more stagnant. Cause it has been something that even though I work with client and I like that part. So the continuing to work with clients I'm doing, the like going at the marketing part of it feels, it's Saki doing marketing alone. I don't like it. I don't like it.
Taina Brown she/hers (33:44.387)
Let's just stop doing shit alone. Yeah, it does.
Taina Brown she/hers (34:02.269)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it is, is, it is. And so I obviously, I am on forward with like the coaches circle at least doubling if not more this year. But I'm also looking forward to the launches. again, the process was just fun doing it together. And so I'm just also just looking forward to that, like doing that again and just like reiterating and like tweaking it, you know, and like that feels like a really
It feels like a creative kind of project that is an easier lift than like starting something from scratch or doing it on your own or whatever. Personally...
Becky Mollenkamp (34:46.654)
You're going to be looking forward to fewer doggy challenges. Hopefully.
Taina Brown she/hers (34:50.469)
And yeah, yeah, it'll be, you know, it's a...
Becky Mollenkamp (34:57.148)
I know. That's what it's been this week.
Taina Brown she/hers (34:57.882)
It'll be sad. It'll be sad, but it'll be quiet or more quiet because my wife talks 24-7, even in her sleep. But it'll save us a little bit of money and also the house won't always smell like dog. When you have dogs, it's just kind of hard for...
Becky Mollenkamp (35:12.362)
That's my kid.
Taina Brown she/hers (35:26.276)
your living space to just not smell like dog all the time. And so it's just a thing. Yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (35:31.018)
especially as they age and certain breeds too. Our box, forget it, the house smelled like dog.
Taina Brown she/hers (35:37.849)
Yeah, yeah, there is definitely an area rug that we will have to get rid of.
Becky Mollenkamp (35:43.038)
we moved one to the garage because of that and then realized, no, it can't be there either because of the garage started to smell like piss and we're like, no. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (35:49.217)
Yeah. So, yeah, yeah, I'm also just looking forward to like personally just kind of having more like emotional and mental capacity to like connect with people, people that I've known for a while, but also maybe make some new friends along the way.
Becky Mollenkamp (36:05.631)
me.
Becky Mollenkamp (36:13.076)
Well, you've been putting yourself out there more too. You've been doing IRL, like connecting and showing up. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (36:18.433)
Yeah, I have my writing group that I go to every Monday night, which has been fun. I, this is something I'm really looking forward to actually. like, because I've also just been dabbling back into writing, I have been working on a multi-chapter like fanfic. And so I have like 50K words written already that I've been editing. I know, and I'm not even like a third of the way through.
Becky Mollenkamp (36:43.338)
That's like a full-on book, friend. Probably more words than my book will end up having, because my book is so chopped up that it's not gonna be. That's amazing.
Taina Brown she/hers (36:49.914)
Yeah. Yeah, and I'm like halfway through chapter six. So I'm not even like a third of the way through. So I'm looking forward to, my goal is to hopefully by the time this is aired to have like the first three chapters already published on AO3 and then just start doing like weekly or bimonthly updates.
Becky Mollenkamp (37:13.098)
Will it be under your name or would they be like if people wanted to find it, can they search Taina on AO3 or? Are you going to tell people what your pen name is or we just they're just going to have no. You don't have to this is or maybe you want to keep thinking about it. I was curious like how public are you going to be about about what you're publishing?
Taina Brown she/hers (37:18.568)
hell no.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:23.513)
my God, I don't know if I wanna do that.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:32.295)
I will say this, I will say this. If you want more information on that, you can follow my bookstuh, my bookstagram, and it's Tyena Reads. Yeah, so you can follow me there to get information on it, but I don't think I will give away my...
Becky Mollenkamp (37:39.114)
Taina reads, okay.
Becky Mollenkamp (37:44.82)
Perfect, that's a great thing because if somebody takes the energy to do that, then that means maybe they actually want to know. Or they reach out to you. If they do well, then you might share. I think that's fair.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:49.919)
Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, so there will be NSFW stuff on my bookstub, but also just like fluffy stuff that is just cute. So yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (38:03.818)
I love it, I love it. Okay, and you know, I will like, I'm gonna end this with like sappiness. I am so honored to get to do this with you. I'm so glad you said yes when I proposed it, because I don't know that we, I we knew each other a while, but not that long and not that deeply. so.
Yes, doing this and I love the way it's been evolving and like blossoming like you said, and I'm just really honored to get to share space with you and have these conversations and then like have it also lead to doing business together and you know, like I'm just very lucky and.
As always continuing to learn from you. I your if you ever say yes, I haven't gotten your yes back yet But if you said your approval you'll be in the book along with other people who've really taught me faith has already faith Clark has Is in the book and she's approved hers Jordan is in the book Jordan Maney She approved hers Amelia Ruby Kelly deals just some of the people I've been learning from and you're definitely probably the person I'm learning the most you and faith because I spend the most time in space you
Taina Brown she/hers (38:53.71)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (39:09.326)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (39:10.27)
you. I learned so much and so I just am really honored and grateful and all that sappy stuff. I'm not a real sappy person. There you go. I'm to continue in 2006.
Taina Brown she/hers (39:15.93)
Yeah. Thank you, Fran. I am too. This has been such an unexpected turn of a sequence of events with you. And so I'm not typically the person to initiate a lot of things. So I'm very thankful that you initiate a lot. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (39:38.218)
Thank you. I need a reassurance because sometimes I wonder, because I am an initiator, I'm an activator by clout and strengths or whatever, and I'm a person who's, love to start things and get things going. And I do sometimes wonder if my golden retriever energy, as I call it, like that excitable, right? Like, yeah, I do feel, I often feel like I'm way too much for people. I've been, you know, as most women have been told, I've been told I'm too much throughout life. So this is very nice to hear like, no, I appreciate you.
Taina Brown she/hers (39:53.102)
Is it too much?
Becky Mollenkamp (40:06.492)
instigating because I always sometimes because you know like you worry am I guilt is somebody gonna feel guilty are they doing because they want to or because I've pressured them or they feel guilty you know so thank you for that
Taina Brown she/hers (40:07.587)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (40:14.424)
Yeah.
Yeah, no, you're so welcome. You're not too much. I, thankfully, because of therapy, have learned to be like, I need a minute to think about that. That's a great idea, but let me think about it. And so I think that creates a really healthy dynamic between the two of us. And hopefully in 2026, we can actually meet in person.
Becky Mollenkamp (40:25.706)
How did
Becky Mollenkamp (40:38.502)
my gosh, wouldn't that be amazing?
Taina Brown she/hers (40:40.057)
Because we've never met up in person.
Becky Mollenkamp (40:42.026)
I know, I know, I know. There is a podcast event in New York in 2026. I think, the problem is I think it's winter and I don't think it's summer. If it's the summer, I love New York in the summer. Even though I know some, that's why lot of New Yorkers flee, because they think it's too hot. But I prefer to go, I don't really love New York in the winter, it's just too cold. And I don't want to deal with traveling when there's ice and snow. But if...
Taina Brown she/hers (40:50.349)
When?
Taina Brown she/hers (40:55.747)
Mm.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:03.296)
Mm-hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:07.107)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (41:07.816)
summer event I might want to go and that's not I mean it's not like that's next door to you but at least it gets us closer to a coast. Or who knows my dad is now living near Atlanta so maybe we can meet in Atlanta sometime who know. That'd be cool. I'll put it on my on my my vision board I'm not making a vision board this year that's a lie but if I did in my mental. I do love a vision board.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:13.889)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:22.359)
Yeah, yeah, it would be cool.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:31.385)
You're setting the intention out there.
Becky Mollenkamp (41:35.656)
Yeah, I just I love a vision board. I haven't done one this year. Do you do vision boards?
Taina Brown she/hers (41:40.313)
no. I used to. I haven't done one in a long time.
Becky Mollenkamp (41:45.342)
They do feel a little like white lady insta, like to me in a way, but also there is something nice about it. Like not so much the board itself, but like the process, the way it makes you think. Yeah, it just makes you think a little bigger for yourself or explore or like in touch with what do you really want? That part of it I like. So maybe we should do one. All right. Well, I look forward to our planning session.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:56.163)
the process of setting intentions.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:01.913)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:05.561)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I agree. I I agree.
Becky Mollenkamp (42:13.93)
for 2026. I look forward to 2026. And thank you. That's it. Thank you.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:19.843)
Thank you. Yeah. And thank y'all for listening and being with us.
Becky Mollenkamp (42:24.148)
for realsies and you know we don't do this enough but I really think we should try to remember to give it like a holler at your keyboard moment as another group I'm in.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:33.023)
Yes, leave us a comment or a review, share with a friend.
Becky Mollenkamp (42:39.306)
any of that or let us know like I'd love to hear from people what did what did you learn from the show in 2025 what was your favorite part of the show what do you want to see more of in 2026 that kind of stuff is super super helpful we should have done this at start of the episode because by the end of the episode people are tuned out if you've stuck around for this part then please please leave a comment if you're on YouTube
Taina Brown she/hers (42:47.661)
What was your favorite episode? Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (43:03.072)
Yeah, you're a one. If you're still listening, you're a real one.
Becky Mollenkamp (43:06.218)
Spotify and YouTube, you can leave comments. If not, if you're on Apple, leave a review. Any of those things help. All right. Yes. Have a wonderful 2026. Let's all do this, guys. See you later. Okay.
Taina Brown she/hers (43:10.401)
Yeah. We want to hear from you.