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Are you tired of feeling stuck and unfulfilled? Join JClay and Troy Washington where they reveal the life-changing 'Mirror Principle' that will revolutionize your mindset and propel you towards success. Don't miss out - your future self is counting on you to tune in!
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Creators & Guests
What is Perfect Mode?
"Perfect Mode" invites you on a transformative odyssey to discover the extraordinary within the ordinary. Hosted by the dynamic duo of JClay, a rapper with a spiritual twist, and Troy Washington, a realtor with a mindset of abundance, this podcast is a sanctuary for those seeking to elevate their existence. Together, they explore the realms of personal growth, mental clarity, and spiritual enlightenment, offering unfiltered insights into living a life unchained by societal expectations. Tune in for your weekly dose of inspiration and embark on a journey to align with your highest self.
If I reminded you that you are perfect, would you argue me down or step into your perfection? Welcome to perfect welcome to perfect where there are no excuses, no expectations, and we explore the world without limitations. I'm Jay Clay, rapper, a spiritual teacher, with my co host Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor. Let's be real, so let's be perfect. Perfect.
JClay:Everything. Anything. Anything. Anything. Anything.
JClay:Anything. Anything. Perfect. Everything. Anything.
JClay:Anything. Anything.
JClay:Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. What up?
Troy Washington:What up? Welcome to perfect mode. And first off, let me start by telling y'all that we love y'all. We're grateful for the opportunity to be anywhere, sharing our thoughts, hopefully, and helping you realize that you are perfect. And the only reason and, I mean, the only reason you would think that you're not perfect is if you're looking at this person outside of you and saying, I'm not them.
Troy Washington:But guess what? You are you, and that's all you need. And, of course, it's yours truly. Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood real j Clay spiritual rapper teacher, and we're about to jump on here and talk about the mirror principle. The mirror principle.
Troy Washington:What the world reflects about. Who? You. What up, J?
JClay:Yo. Yo. What up? Happy Sunday to all my perfect people in perfect world. Doing the perfect thing at the perfect place at the perfect time because there's nowhere else to be in the perfect present.
JClay:And, yeah, man, shout out to our to our Patreon. Go ahead and click that link to support. I'm ready to jump into this because this is this is one of those topics of what reality really is, and it and it's it's never changing. It's never compromising. It's always that reflection, and it's it's it's important that we speak about it.
Troy Washington:So, you know, the funniest thing is when I saw this, topic, I I mean, I I think it's supposed to make you think about yourself. Right? It's supposed to make you think about in that moment. What am I seeing, about the world and and what and what do I think about it?
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:And the funny is I I I I wanna tell you the first thing that came to my mind was, man, my life is good. That's how I feel in the moment. But then I also went down a pathway of thinking about the times when I I'm not happy or I feel bad about specific situations. Like, this is what happened, like, in an instant of a second, me seeing the topic. And then I thought about how what I thought about those things could have been different, which in order would have potentially changed my mind.
Troy Washington:But, again, I wonder what your initial thoughts were when you saw the topic.
JClay:Yeah. It it's so many thoughts. Like, this is in a way, this mirrors some of our our other topics, but I but I really wanna get a a a good look at it because the world is one of these one of these modern day idols. We don't we don't realize that, you know, has our attention. And we might say, man, the world is is is doing this or the world this is what's wrong with the world.
JClay:This is that about the world, and we're not realizing that the world is not a fixed place. The world is not the same world for everyone. We even me and you, even though we synced up right now and synced up a lot, we're still in different worlds. And that world really is a reflection, and it says something about you if you will allow it, and then you can actually change the world by changing yourself, which I'm sure many have heard many of times.
Troy Washington:No. I I I 100% agree. And that's the reason why, again, in my reflection moments that I was just telling you about, I literally went to the things that I deemed myself or things that I don't like or things that are unwanted or things that looked ugly. And I had to kind of re again, this is only in a moment's time of me thinking about this. Yeah.
Troy Washington:Just kinda re how did I really perceive these things? And then look at myself and say, well, really what was negative about them if what I have and what I want and the way that I'm living, I deem as great. Right? You know, and, again, a true reflection for me is always my kids. Yeah.
Troy Washington:You know, as a parent, the one thing that I always felt like I wanted to do would be able to give my kids everything. Well, what is everything? I mean, you could think it's a material thing, but I think it's more again, this is just me saying it's more of an an opportunistic idea, like, allowing my kids to understand that everything or anything is possible and look at what's all in front of you versus, again, when I come back and I if I if I think about any given moment and say that I didn't like it or I didn't it was an idea is because in those moments, I deemed something impossible or I deemed something, something that I can't have or something like that. Something that's there's a limitation put on me, and it's it's a it's a crazy idea, but go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and the thing is, like, we we naturally share. We we can't help but share. We are sharing creatures. We're gonna share everything, and and I don't mean, like, necessarily sharing possessions, but the sharing of ideas, the sharing of visions.
JClay:Just like, oh, look at this. Look what I'm witnessing right now. Look look what I'm experiencing, or let me tell you about what I experienced before last week, something like that. And in that sharing, we're cultivating a a joint world where it's like, okay. You can see into my world.
JClay:I can see into your world. And so we we there there's no separation between that, and what we don't realize is every sharing is a cocreation of the universe we have. It's like we're planting a seed. So if we would say the world is going to hell, we're planting a seed with everyone that would listen, including ourselves, that whatever your idea of hell is, it's gonna merge with your idea of the world. But if you're like, man, like you said, like, I mean, I'm feeling good about everything.
JClay:Like, everything is this this is a good place to be and I'm in a good space. That too is you're you're sharing that. You're cultivating that. You're co creating that with all that would listen. Again, including yourself, including your your subconscious mind.
Troy Washington:Yeah. So, again, that that kinda piggybacks on the point that you're making about it only being your world. And I and I I 100% wholeheartedly agree with that. And again, me having kids, I get to it's like an instantaneous observation that I get to have in all things. Because I, you know, again, we all have to realize we're only living within ourselves.
Troy Washington:And, you know, based off what you're saying, like, everything that we experience with other people is always the only thing we could do is share. Because if I'm only living within myself, the only thing I can do is tell you what I'm thinking and or show you what I'm thinking or act on what I'm thinking. And it's it's all an observation from somebody else. You, Finfayson, go ahead, James.
JClay:So so we're checking this this was cool about it. Like, like, everything is an instant observation. So even your kids so, technically, like, there's infinite versions of your kids, but you only see the version based on what you are giving to them in that moment, based on what you've put out to them and held on to, of of your idea of what this moment is, which which includes your past. Because, again, the past is only happening in the present because you're holding the idea that that's what led you to the present, but it's all here. And so when you realize the version of people that we see are just the version that we're allowing ourselves to see is is mind blowing.
JClay:Because I I've seen close relationships change for the better because I was willing to see the best, if that makes sense.
Troy Washington:No. No. I I'm with you 100%. And and I would give you an exact time where me something, the instantaneous reaction from somebody else, which is my kid, and then how I had to try to respond to it. Now, again, the only time when we're unhappy is when there's a limitation imposed on us or we impose it on ourselves.
Troy Washington:So here recently, TJ, my son, is high about everything. I mean, he's in the National Junior Honor Society. He's the president of that. He's in something called, Model UN where he gets to represent different countries and, you know, go and debate. He's also playing basketball on a basketball team.
Troy Washington:He's also playing football on a football team. This is all happening because with with within each other. Right? And so he also just recently got a job with the Dallas Mavericks being able to work for the team. And so we're coming to the end of the football season, and he started talking about, you know, him playing football next year.
Troy Washington:And we were like, well, hey. We've already told you for the past years that at some point, you're gonna have to wind down all the things that you're doing because you don't have enough time in the day to facilitate everything that you're facilitating. Now, again, a lot of this is him him not processing what I'm processing.
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:I'm processing the fact that I remember the day when he got out of school and he had to go straight to football practice and right when he left football practice, he had to go to basketball practice. And in those moments, there was a bit of sadness because he felt like, dang. I'm not gonna be able to play the game today because when I get out of basketball practice, I gotta do homework, and then I gotta go to sleep. Right? And so me running these things through my mind, I tell him, well, hey.
Troy Washington:I've already told you that you're gonna have to kinda figure out a way to do this. Again, limitation ask anything, but you can his entire demeanor or his world changing in those moments. I can see him taking a dot downturn on what he feels like he's capable of doing. And then his rebut to it is, well, didn't Lebron play football? Didn't Allen Iverson play football?
Troy Washington:Didn't Deion Sanders play baseball or Michael Jordan play baseball? And I said, they did. But number 1, we don't know what else they were doing again. And then also, they were they were mastering the things that they were doing already in order to fulfill those other things that they wanted to do. Alright?
Troy Washington:Now again, this is nothing but me creating all kind of limitation for my son. In that moment, he just stops and puts his head down. And I see it. And I and I and I realize it again. It's not something that I wanna do, but it's me helping him realize him.
Troy Washington:Now, again, I I said that to say now again, I don't know what he's thinking. Right? I can only assume. So that's the one thing that you're talking about that we hold on to. Right?
Troy Washington:But what I would like to think or what I hope that I thought that I was thinking was him processing dang. There are some things that I've I it's not that I able to do them. I just don't have the time to do do them in the way that I would like to because of the way that I'm trying to fulfill my life. Right? And, again, this and then to me, that direct relation to an instantaneous reaction, how your world changes, and how the invitation can kinda form the way that you're feeling about things.
Troy Washington:Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. So, like, even in that story I'm kinda with TJ. Because it it it it's one of the but but, again, it I I know your intentions for your son, like, are are the highest. You want the best for your son. And and normally, those those loved ones, when we share things with them, we're not trying to put limitations on them.
JClay:We're trying to we're trying to set their expectations. And, again, we're doing something that we don't even wanna do, but we're we're we're we're trying to teach lessons that we didn't enjoy learning without even considering, like, well, maybe they they could be the exception to what I think can be done. Maybe they can find a way to balance all of these things, or maybe they can find a way to to make all of this happen. And it it it it comes with again, us remembering that, oh, I'm creating this right now by by saying this person has to live in this world according to me. When when that that's just trapping me in my own world because now I'm believing in the limitations that I'm seeing.
Troy Washington:So that's the second part to this. Right? Now, again, that's why I said in those moments, he's not processing all that I processed from him. Now you're right. Of course.
Troy Washington:You know, I'm using limitation as a a term so that way we can make the conversation make sense. But, of course, you know, I don't feel like my kids have any limitations. You're right. Setting expectations. But in that, again, I'm processing what I've seen from him, the way that I saw him articulate how he felt about it in the moment, but I'm also articulating the way that I feel about it.
Troy Washington:Right? And that's the part that you're talking about, and I get it. And that's the that's where the mirror comes into play because through all that he said and that he exhibited toward me, I also put myself in his place though I'm not there. And I say, well, if I was in his shoes, I would feel this kind of way. And so now whenever that comes to my life, my world, I look at all the things that I have and I say, well, this is probably the reason why I'm not able to excel here.
Troy Washington:And and the reality of it is that is the reason why I'm not able to excel because I've already made created that limitation that we're talking about. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and if we remember like that, the more we give, the more we get to keep. Like, again, like like, the things that we share with others, we're strengthening them in ourselves. We're we're making it bigger in our world. So the more freedom we can give people, the more freedom we have.
JClay:The the more, I don't know. We we just uplift people the more we feel uplifted. And it and it's cool how it works because a lot of the limitations that we have are the ones that we've witnessed. And, again, we probably shared it with somebody on a one off comment, not even realizing how how commonly we spew limitations at our even ourselves and others. And it's not till we just kinda take a pause and and see what we're sharing, see what we're we're thinking, see how we look at certain situations when when we come up to something.
JClay:Like like, a lot of people use money as an example where they say, ah, this is expensive. And, like, that's a that's a straight limitation. That that's saying that, okay. I'm not aligned with being expensive or I'm not aligned with the amount of money that this would cost where this wouldn't be expensive. And so I'm I'm caught being on the outside looking in at all of the at at this great life that I want thinking that I can't have it.
JClay:And all of that in this one simple phrase, that's too expensive.
Troy Washington:So so funny that you say that. And, again, it's it's part of the reason why I wanted to talk about the situation that I just told you because in it, even as I was doing it and and I I think this is big when when we talk about the mirror principle because recognizing where you are, what you're presenting is important. So I recognize the limitation. I I even even for me to articulate it to to you today prior to this, I had already thought about it. I thought about it while while it But, generally, what I try to use is, generic terminology for my family just in general.
Troy Washington:And and so if you were asking me, can I do this as well? I would I would I would answer something to the effect of you have enough time to. Right? Or if you feel like you're capable of it. Right?
Troy Washington:And that's generally how I respond. Now, again, in this specific instance, there are, a lot of factors that went into play for my decision for Sandy, which again, I gave you some of them. But again, when I when I come back and I think about myself, even you said when you give things to other people, there's always a generalized, yes, you can type of field to any kind of answer because you don't want to impose those type of pose those type of limitations on yourself. Because the reality, you know, is that what you said is that, that that you give, you get to keep, you get to hold. And you might not think of it or see it on the forefront, but it's literally something that you live with.
Troy Washington:It's something that you you have and concrete made yourself a believer in, but go ahead, Jake.
JClay:Yeah. Yeah. And and the the the good thing, though, is that, like how do I say this? The the lessons that that you're teaching too aren't the the harsh type. You know what I mean?
JClay:Like, a a lot of times, I I've seen parents or or just people like me. Yeah. I gotta teach them a lesson. I gotta teach them a lesson. They gotta learn this how the world is.
JClay:They gotta learn that the world is harsh, that the world is they they won't look out for you and and stuff. And it's like, but you're the one that's doing this to this person that you love. The world isn't doing this at all. It's you. And so now they they live with that and they move according to that and they perpetuate that that same mindset, that same ruling without even realizing it.
JClay:And so, again, like, it is is mindfulness is the key. Like, do really see what you're saying because even when I when I did it to myself initially, I again, I was shocked. I was like, man, this is why I'm in this world. This is why the world doesn't look as bright as it does to me because I'm constantly seeing this insaneness. And, real quick shout out to, to him loud.
JClay:Yo yo.
Troy Washington:What up him loud? So I wanna tell you, what this also made me think about is, I have a good friend. When we were in college, he was, you know, pledging. And, you know, when you pledge or when you try to pledge, they give you all these mind games and things of that nature to try to test to see how you're gonna respond. Yeah.
Troy Washington:And the one thing that always stuck with me now I'm a fast forward real quick before I tell you what stuck with me. The person that I'm talking about is the most positive person. I mean, he's, he's always overcoming things that you would think that someone wouldn't overcome. But he literally just he figures out a way a lot of the time. Right?
Troy Washington:Doesn't mean he's a millionaire. He's he's just successful in his own right and his own way. Right? But the thing that stuck with me was he told me the question that they asked him when he was in online one day was, can a duck pull a truck? Right?
Troy Washington:And they they asked him that. And, again, when he told me in my mind, I was thinking, no. A duck can't pull a truck. You know what I'm saying? Like, you know, just, you know, all the things that you would think as an answer because you gotta give them a good answer.
Troy Washington:Right? And his answer was if the duck is strong enough. Right? And so it's like a a moment. It's and and and it show how we form limitations that are not necessary because there was no description of the duck strength.
Troy Washington:There was no description of the duck size nor the truck size. Right?
JClay:Right.
Troy Washington:And so what we end up doing is we held on to something from the past, I e, me using my son as the example. Now I told you there were a lot of things I was processing when I told him what I was tell was telling him. Now, again, I didn't wanna tell him any of it because there are things that I held on to, but there are other things that I could have held on to. One thing is my son is straight a student. Right?
Troy Washington:He's excelling in all his sports. Right? And they're so, again, these are not things that are in the forefront. It's the other things that I saw that were a problem for him. And it it just goes to show you, how we how we function it.
Troy Washington:And, again, bringing it back to me, there are always a lot of positive things that are in opposition of what are the the things that are holding me back. I can always think of the good things or the positive things or the more promising idea, but we hold on to the other the other things instead. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. So so 2 things. 1, like, so knowing who you are. To to me, you are someone that you I I call you a go getter. You gonna figure it out.
JClay:You gonna make it happen regardless of the limitations, time limitation limitations, constraints, or whatever. And so I would I would assume that your son inherited all of that, and he sees all of this. So in his mind, I'm a make it work. It's gonna be tough, but I'm a figure it out. And then and so I'm just saying this as a reminder, like, yeah, it it it he definitely can do this all.
JClay:Not to say it's gonna be easy. Not to say he's gonna enjoy every moment, but it's it's one of those learning experiences, which is cool. And then secondly, I wanted to read this this lyric that I was kinda proud of of a song that's coming out soon, but I just wanna but it it it points to this. Like, the jailed becomes the jailer enforcing rules he was teached. Too busy jelling mo jealous, jealous forgets that he's free.
JClay:Jealous calls everyone jealous when they don't care for his key. Because jealous sold on a sale, he tried to sell one to me. And and what that means is, like, oftentimes, we we go on just enforcing these rules that we were taught, and we just pass it on to the next man, not realizing again that we're locking ourselves in these sales. You're a free man, but you're you're proclaiming limitations. You're proclaiming sentences on yourself that that you don't have to, and it's it's like, let that go, man.
JClay:Like like, give everyone their their freedom papers.
Troy Washington:You know, the funniest thing is on the most simplistic side of what you just said, I mean, if you look at any person I ain't gonna say any person, but I've heard a lot of stories, I'll say like that, from correctional officers. Right? And those correctional officers, they won't necessarily say it the way that I'm saying it, but they ended up forgetting what side they were on. And so there are plenty of stories where correctional officers are participating in helping facilitate crimes going on in the jail. There are plenty instances where, correctional officers are participating in sexual activities with prisoners in the jail.
Troy Washington:There are plenty there are plenty, examples if you look where the the the correctional officers failed like they were prison of their prisoners of their own job. And again, these are just stories that I've heard just listening to people and it is I mean, so I'm I'm gonna give you some some some some love real quick. Fire fire line, fire fire analogy, fire fire wordplay, and rhyming with it. It it was all tight, you know. But your point is definitely 100%.
Troy Washington:And again, so that way we don't separate ourselves from the point, you as a correctional officer in jail. The point is here, these rules that we create are our prison. Everything that you're enforcing on someone, those lines end up being blurred because you live what you speak. You're living the words that come out of your mouth. You are only willing to reinforce stuff that you know.
Troy Washington:Like, nobody's running around reinforcing things that they don't know. And so that which you see, that mirror, the things that you've even deemed the world to be are the things that are within you. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Because yeah. You you can't separate yourself from what you're giving and what you're receiving. It it it's 1. So even to take it out of out of the jail, like, if you're a manager and you're micromanaging an employee and they feel like they're being watched, in the same instance, you're being held in that same activity because you have to watch them.
JClay:You have to micromanage them. So you're you're in a space where a sense where, like, you're in the same boat as the person you're watching. And and you you wonder, like, man, yeah, these employees, they suck, they this, but it is it's you adding the suckage to the situation not realizing it. And the the the the quicker we can get to realizing what we receive and how we receive things in this moment is based on what we're giving the moment, based on how we're defining the moment, the quicker we can live a better life. Because, again, that that that's not to say that things won't happen that you don't agree with, but you don't have to give it a negative meaning.
JClay:You don't have to you don't have to give that that that, this going this means this. Everything messed up. This messed up my whole day. You don't have to give it that meaning. You can say, you know what?
JClay:This this happened for a reason. I'm gonna receive whatever that that high reason is because I know God let me here for a reason.
Troy Washington:Bro, you want me to tell you what's funny about This is what okay. So you're talking about reframing the thought process or how you look at it regardless of the outcome. And now this is funny that this even comes to me. And and, again, I have tons of people that around me including myself. I may even even uttered this phrase before.
Troy Washington:He may not come when you want to, but he's always and everybody there's a lot of people around me that have that same sentiment. Like, God always comes on time. And so with that creative or with that's crafting in the world where I'm going to be in a situation and right when I need him, he's gonna come up versus saying, God is always early. God is always upfront. You know what I'm saying?
Troy Washington:And and and again, the funniest part to this is that even in me saying it, experiencing it myself, number 1, but also seeing other people say this, he always do show up right when they need him. Right? Like, it's it's it's it's funny, when you just think about and and and and again, there's a lot of different factors that we can, you know, we can bring into this whole scenario when you when you talk about that. But but it's it's funny to think that a lot of people that that that's a principle and their life reflects that it happens over and over again. And you have to ask yourself why.
Troy Washington:You have to ask yourself why I'm not changing what I think so that way that can also change as well. But go ahead, Dave. Alright. Yeah.
JClay:A lot of times when people would be like, I knew it. I knew that was gonna happen. It's because, again, they they're creating this reality. But what would happen if they knew what they really wanted? Like and and, again, like, we don't realize that it's that easy.
JClay:It's the same you're using you're adding thoughts and emotions to it. It's the same exact thing. What if you knew it? But a lot of times, people will have more faith in the problem than they would the solution. But, again, it's it's the same faith, and you can have it in whatever you want to and have faith in yourself, if anything.
JClay:Or like you said, have faith that god is always here, Not not when you need him. He's here when you need him, when you don't need him, just when you want him, when you don't want him. He's always here. Like, you you could you could set it up however you want to.
Troy Washington:But but and and again, only reason I I again, I break it up because the more when we're talking about it, it just it was just in the forefront of my mind. But the reality of it is, we could think about, like, no matter what it is, like but the question, I guess, you have to say so let let let me let me just step back. Right? The mirror principle, what the world reflects about you. Right?
Troy Washington:I am giving off to the world, and I'm saying back that God is always on time. Like, I'm telling everybody that, and that mug is coming back to me. What is the hang up? And just using that as an example, you know, that's why I like terms of I don't like the term, but I do like the the sentiment of fake it till you make it. Right?
Troy Washington:That's why I like the sentiment of that because I don't like the term for it. I wish we can come up with a different, you know, terminology for it because you can just, like, live it until you realize it or something. I don't know. You know what I'm saying? Something great like that, but there's a negative connotation tied to that.
Troy Washington:Right? It's the reason why people don't want to be open. They don't want to mirror that to other people because it doesn't feel real to them. And I guess that's the the question is, how do we get to the point where these things that we're talking about are easily done. But myself, you know, people always give me love.
Troy Washington:And the reason why is because I always give everybody love. If I talk to you about anything that you're doing, I am going to give you a positive outlook, a positive under all circumstances. Right? It's just gonna be how it's it's gonna happen. So whenever people talk to me, if they hear me talk to them, which I rarely do, they're gonna be like, no.
Troy Washington:You got this mug. And all the reason I feel like that happened is because they know my nature. I've shown them what it is and they have to come back to me. But that same rule can apply to everything. And the question is, using myself, using you, when it comes to whatever you got going on.
Troy Washington:But just people in general, why is it so hard to try to reflect what we want to reflect back to us?
JClay:Yeah. So I wouldn't even say it would it's hard. It's just out of practice. You you've you've wanted to experience the opposite for some reason. Maybe, you know, somebody told you it's better to to live this way or or you just forgot your about your own power.
JClay:So, like, the the previous show, we talked about how each of us has a unique perspective to the unconscious that we can bring out to the conscious and show the world. So we we all know things or we can tap into this knowledge that no one in the world can tap into, and we can we can essentially make something out of no thing. And when we tap into that and trust ourselves, it's easy to live it because we know it. Like, we see it. You you might not see it yet.
JClay:And that's the that's the fun part. I'm like, okay. I'm a figure out how to get you to see this. I'm a get you to see what I know is there. So it it's not even fake it till you make it.
JClay:It's just you know it, know it and and show others so that they can know it too. Like, I don't
Troy Washington:know that there's a
JClay:rhyme like that.
Troy Washington:Go it and show it, baby.
JClay:Yeah. Like like I like, actually, today, when I was driving back from basketball, I was writing a song, and the first line is, live it if live it if it isn't really wait. If it like, live it even if it really isn't. Like that yeah. So so that's that's kind of a way, but same sentiment.
Troy Washington:Yeah. Know it know it and show it, baby. Know it and show it. I like it. But, but but so so here's another funny thing about this conversation.
Troy Washington:And and, again, I I'm telling and I know that you may have experienced you may not have experienced this before, but you can tell me. But there have been times where I'm talking to different people, and they and their response to me was, well, that's everybody don't know. I was gonna hear that all the time. I've I've had that happen to me before. Right?
Troy Washington:And the funniest part about it was, in my mind, I'm thinking to myself, but this is what you need to hear. Right? This is what I was thinking. But I had to go back now. This is where the mirror reflects.
Troy Washington:I had to really dig deep down this and say, have I ever said that? And the reality was I never said it, but I've thought it. When somebody was talking to me, I took it, but I literally thought to myself, but I don't wanna hear that. I really don't wanna hear this, though, right now. And, again, these are things that you you might not feel like you are exhibiting, but everything exhibited.
Troy Washington:You know? You your your body language, the way that you and you have to rid yourself of that, of which you don't want. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Like and and to the and stuff like that, I I smile because I I say to people, well, you know that if you was bringing this to me, that you have no choice but to hear this. So that means you really wanna hear this because you know who I am, and you know what I'm a say. And then on the flip side of of them sharing whatever this limitation is, like, the way I I I see it, it's a new way for me to to teach. Like, it's a new way for me to to add into my world, a way to overcome that that limited belief in that particular way.
JClay:Because, you know, everybody has their own unique way of seeing things, so their limitations are slightly different even though it's all the same. And I I really enjoy teaching that, sharing that. Like, nah. You I live like this. Like, there's another way.
JClay:There's a better way if you're open to it. And even that better way has a better way, which is like the the most mind blowingest, coolest thing ever. So, so, yeah, I'm I'm I'm I'm with you. Like, you you know, I heard you say this before where don't hold yourself back because for the sake of someone else because they're, like, they're talking to you for a reason because they want you to be you.
Troy Washington:Yep. Yep. And, you know, the other the other piece to that is, again, I I told you how I had to think about because I'm a true believer in this reflection. Like, I know everything that I have an adverse feeling about. Even the stuff that I have a positive reaction to, I know that it's something that I put out and I'm just receiving back.
Troy Washington:So using the example that I just told you where I know I haven't verbally, said that to somebody, but I know I felt that way before. But I think that the other part to it is being open to whatever the response is truly. You know what I mean? Because a a a a a a a big part of that is you being able to talk And no matter what is given back, not necessarily saying it has to be something that you're in agreeance or that you're going to, you know, I guess, run your life, by, but being, like you say, open to seeing their their perspective of other people. Because when you're and without judgment is the key here.
Troy Washington:Seeing the perspective without the judgment. Because what you're wanting from people is not necessarily acceptance on what you're saying either, but you're wanting them to be open perspective without judgment. And, again, that's the big piece to that. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. As, again, as somewhat I remember my conversations with other kids when I was a kid. I don't know how I remember this this stuff. And, again, I I know you're parents, so you've you've heard a lot of kid conversations. Kids will not be on the same page, but it does not matter.
JClay:Like, this kid talking about this, this kid talking about this, but they're together. They're having a conversation with each other, and none of it matter. One one is not trying to tell the other that you need to diminish your goals or that this can't happen. You just you just open to it, like you said, without that judgment. And we can be like that.
JClay:But but but, again, people can sometimes make what someone's saying like, they can be fearful of it because they think it will influence the whole world. Like, even though they know that what's being shared could be nonsense, like, oh, that's not true. And that and it being like like people would get mad at them for saying something that's nonsense. It's like, no. Don't don't get mad at them.
JClay:They're doing themselves a dis a a a disservice because they're bringing falsity into their world. They're bringing into their world where they can't trust the power of their own tongue. So it's it's not to be mad at them. It's you could just to just learn from them. Like, nah.
JClay:I don't wanna live my life like that. I appreciate you showing me a version that could be lived out, but this is just not for me.
Troy Washington:So I want to give you, tell you something that happened yesterday. So yesterday, we went to a FC Dallas game, which is a soccer a professional soccer team game last night.
JClay:Yeah.
Troy Washington:And, when we were on our way out there, we get in the car, and it's an hour drive. Literally, for the first 30 minutes of the trip, Brody was going ham. I mean, like, we quiet in the car. And in my mind, I'm thinking to myself, I just wanna tell him just to chill, bro. Like, just just chill.
Troy Washington:Right? Like, just I'm because I'm I'm telling you, like, he's the one here. He I'm slim shape. Like, he just saying everything. Like, everything that he could possibly think of to say, but 30 minutes straight he just rapping, singing, just talking, just going hard.
Troy Washington:Right? And I had I'm hearing it but I'm thinking all at the same time. And I I'm thinking to myself, what world do I want this to be? Right? What world do I what world am I wanting to create?
Troy Washington:Do I want a world where somebody is trying to stop me from expressing myself in whatever way I know possible in this moment? And so what I ended up doing, even though I was getting ran up the wall, like, it was it was it was I'm talking about nonstop. I just didn't say anything, and I just let him go. He did the whole time. And, he, you know, he was so excited.
Troy Washington:He was just like, you hear that, dad? I'm I'm rhyming. Did you hear that? I was like, yeah. You you were singing Slimshade.
Troy Washington:No. I was doing my version of Slimshade. I was like, yeah. Yeah. You you were doing your version.
Troy Washington:And I missed this song and I'm and he just going here. And again, then I bring it back to myself and the life that I'm living now. I I do want the exact same thing that he had. And the reality of it is I do have that. And because of me not cutting off the limitations of others because, you know, I know people might think that you well, nobody's gonna come on and tell us on perfect mode not to do what we're doing.
Troy Washington:But it's not about anybody else coming on perfect mode telling it's gonna be me telling myself that I don't need to do it because nobody wants to hear that. And that's the way that reflection kind of, works on you because it's you working on yourself. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And what what's cool about about your story too is that in some ways, that was a form of meditation for him. So what I mean is, like, one, he had a safe environment where he can share. Because, you know, I know I know he's going to school now and stuff, and you gotta be quiet. You gotta be obedient.
JClay:All the natural instincts that people don't have. And it's like you you you have to just sit here in this box for 8 hours a day or whatever. That but it that's my limitations on school that that are coming out right now. Anyway, but yeah. But but, a lot of times, you need that outlet to allow your thoughts to settle.
JClay:And you can do it in silence. You can do it out loud. You can do it through sport or exercise, but you you need that outlet to settle. And I've seen some instances where some parents are like, hey. Shut up.
JClay:Like and and and so all of that gets bottled in and never sees an outlet, and then it it it grows in an inhumane way. And it can come out in in in ways like, man, I why why did they lash out like that? It's because it didn't have a natural outlet. And so I I I commend you for allowing him to to have that. And like you said, you freed up yourself and your world by by allowing that as well.
JClay:It's like, oh, yeah. I'm I'm allowed to be me whenever I wanna be me, especially on the show.
Troy Washington:Yeah. I mean and I'm giving you one other piece to the puzzle by the end. Now mind you, with a hour drive, and I'm and, again, this is not an exaggeration. When I say he went for 30 minutes, probably more, like, straight, But we all were quiet in the car. Nobody was saying that there, but it was just letting him do his thing.
Troy Washington:So when he finally stopped, TJ turned his phone off. Because the t his phone wouldn't even know. He turned it up, and he was listening to it. Right? And, bro, he was like, TJ, can you turn that down?
Troy Washington:Because I I can't hear stuff. And I was able to turn around and say, hey, we just got through letting you do what you wanted to do. Let him listen to what he want to. And literally, it was no fight. He literally just chilled out and let let TJ listen to his stuff the whole way.
Troy Washington:So, again, it it was a realization for himself as well that we can do what we wanna do. So but go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. No. That that that's that's cool, man. I I I I applaud that whole situation because the because that's the the stopper of everyone being their best selves is just believing that they're limited, believing that they can't be their best selves at every moment, believing and and and believing that there is no room for anyone else to shine. Like, oh, if they're shining, I can't shine.
JClay:And this that's that's furthest from the truth. So even shout out to TJ too who who waited. He was like, okay. My brother doing this thing is cool. You done?
JClay:Alright. I'm a do my thing. And, like, that's that's beautiful.
Troy Washington:Yeah. That boy was when he he he was going he's going ham in the car, bro. He was going ham, yo, yesterday, but not but and, ultimately, I I 100% agree with you, and I didn't I didn't even see the point of I mean, I I recognize TJ just allowed him to have his space, but you're right. You know, understanding, without even without even saying anything that I'm a be okay. Just give let let me, you know, let me chill out And, him to know that he would have his time is a is a great, great thing.
Troy Washington:But yeah. No. It's pretty pretty tight. But I, you know, I come back to the mirror, the principle, and then also when I was saying that, well, we cut off within ourselves. And, you know, there have been plenty times in my life I have because of what I told someone else.
Troy Washington:And it it wasn't it wasn't, you know, apples for apples. It could have been I was doing oranges and they were doing apples. But that same principle trickle trickle over to my orange, and I still cut my orange short. And, again, this is why I emphasize even for myself. Whenever I talk to people now, it's always uplifting, number 1.
Troy Washington:Number 2, if it's something that I feel like is impossible, I take the duck pulling the truck principle. Can a duck pull the truck? Yeah. If the duck is strong enough. And I always and and that's to say that I don't have the answer for that.
Troy Washington:But I think that you can if you figure out the way. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:So so check this out. Like, so speaking of the of the mirror principle, I I've seen how people look at themselves in the mirror from being behind the mirror, and I'll give an example. Okay? So we have this app that that Troy and I communicate on called perfect mode. I mean, called, Marco Polo.
JClay:And it's like you you send video messages to each other. And, like, I I have these conversations with with others as well. And sometimes when when people see their reflection, they'll point out something about themselves that they don't like, and they'll harp on it, making it bigger, making it grander, sharing it more so that it becomes bigger. And I'm I'm trying to figure out the words how how to stress this, but it's like they get more caught up in the reflection more like, more than what's being reflected, but not realizing that they're the one that's doing the reflection. So it it it's not even about the object that they see on their face or whatever, and it's not even about them seeing themselves because they're not seeing themselves.
JClay:They're they're seeing their projection almost. And if you can remember that this is just a projection that you're seeing, you can change it even without physically changing something. Like and and, again, I I I can't stress that because I'm just now fully understanding that now, but it it's, again, there there's no world. It's only your magnifying glen lens on it that you're seeing the reflection of what you're holding the magnifying glass on. And shout out to him now.
Troy Washington:Yeah. No. Yeah. Shout out to him now. He said self respect is important.
Troy Washington:And and just kinda cosign what you're saying, hey, is, I mean, if you if you've ever been in a relationship, if you're married, and if or your husband comes to you, when they're getting dressed, and they say, can't do you see this? And you're looking like, what are you talking about? And they'll point out something that you wouldn't have noticed. It may it's just it was almost impossible for you to see unless they literally put their finger on it. Right?
Troy Washington:And I'm saying this because my wife has done it before. I've heard other people do it before as well. And in these instances, I would literally tell her or whoever would say that to me is nobody would see that unless you point that out. Each point on Marco Polo that are around us, They will point out things that I I see them all the time, and I just not only do I not see what they're talking about, it's even so it's hard for me to even agree with what they're saying because it doesn't even make sense. And, it's it's it's funny what we project in ourselves.
Troy Washington:But again, a part of that is based on what we're believe our projection is a lot of times what we're believing, we think other people think. And, you know, one of the things that I'll tell you about me, you know, I'm getting my my hair is locking up now. Right? I'm I got locks now. Mhmm.
Troy Washington:And, you know, when I first started growing my hair, everybody would always talk to me about this lock journey. It's the it's the journey. And so when I'm at this point that I met, I was talking to somebody, and they was like, what you think about the journey? And I was like, you know, for me, it's just my hair growing. You know, I had long hair before, so I don't think nothing of it.
Troy Washington:And I and I told them specifically, I said, I think that people probably be getting caught up in how it looks now while it's growing because they think that people wanna look at them in a way, like, why your hair look crazy or something. Right? I don't know. Right? And I said, well, I really don't really care about that.
Troy Washington:And they told me specifically, well, you're 100% right, Troy. Most people call it the ugly phase. Right? Again, this is something I don't know about this whole journey. Right?
Troy Washington:And they don't like going through that phase because of perception of what they think other people think about them until they get to wherever they're trying to go. And the the the cool part for myself is I never looked at myself as going through an ugly phase because to me, I always look like me. And so the journey that I'm traveling is not the same as most people that will be going through what I'm going through because my perception is completely different. And me to me, that's the best interpretation that I can give to it because and and and just show you that even somebody that's gone through this journey before me, they can look at me through their lenses that they felt about themselves and see my see me the way that they saw themselves as well, even though it still does not reflect that way to me. But go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And and to that, I got I wanna pose an an open ended question to to anyone watching this, and it it's it's rhetorical. But when you look at the world, when you look at a a painting, when you look at your reflection, are you looking for what's wrong with it, or are you appreciating what's right with it? And because you you can't do both. You you can't both criticize and appreciate at the same time.
JClay:You have to take time to do one or the other, and each comes with its with its, cousin, so to speak. Like, the the once you see something wrong, you start noticing everything else wrong, and then you start believing in wrongness itself. But if you if you appreciate what's good, then you start saying like, oh, this is all by design. This is all perfect. This was all always perfect.
JClay:And you you you have that that piece that comes along with it as well.
Troy Washington:And I gotta open in the question to tag along with it. How can you not appreciate it It's so different from everything else. How? It's literally different from everything else. How can you not appreciate it?
Troy Washington:And, again, I point that out because I know for a fact, and this is not just in my world, the things that we have found ourselves being hooked to, whether it be social media, art, music, it was because it was different. It's the things that we love the most are the things that were different. And you don't give yourself the same credit that you give these things that you've fallen in love with because you're looking at them like they should be like something else. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. Did I share the with you the the Roach story?
Troy Washington:Uh-uh.
JClay:Okay. So I I'm I belong I go to this this group on Tuesday, the spiritual group. We just talk about different topics. And this one lady has shared how I think she said she was, like, at some kinda not a museum. Something where they had, like, bugs and people can look at different types of insects and stuff.
JClay:And so she came up to the roaches, which she personally doesn't like, but she knew that she didn't wanna bring that bias to her daughter. So she said, she's like, oh, look at those those roaches. Aren't they aren't they cute? Aren't they nice? And then so the daughter was like, wow.
JClay:They are cute. Look at them. Look at that. And so you can see the amazement of of these roaches, which, again, is an insect a lot of people don't mess with. So then another lady came up, and she's like, oh, this is disgusting.
JClay:I can't I I I can't deal with this and walked away. And she said on her daughter's face, you can see the lick of confusion come over her. It's like, wait. What do I do? I just thought this was cute.
JClay:Now it's not anymore. What do I do? And then she lost interest and and walked away. And that's that's very important because, again, like like, we don't realize the the impact we have on each other and how a lot of our likes and dislikes might not be genuine. It just might be because of some of the more polarizing figures around us that was their likes and dislikes, and we just accepted it.
JClay:So it it and, again, it's important to discern too, like, what what you really enjoy for you and and what you don't enjoy for you versus just going with the flow, so to speak.
Troy Washington:Bro. No. No. No. 100%.
Troy Washington:100%. I know this to be true. Reason being is because bro Brody growing up, which is my 6 year old, everybody that's listening, I used to have a problem with, I e, wife, Charnae, or my oldest, TJ, which is 12 now, playing or running away from bugs. So, like, a fly would come. TJ is not afraid of a fly, but he would be dramatic like, oh, he'll he'll he'll be acting crazy about it.
Troy Washington:Right? Or if it's a beetle or something that fly, you know, beetle becoming one of like, Sharnell, like, she'll and so what happens is I'm always trying to stay calm or cool, but they're he's around them more than he's around me when these instances would come up. But whenever I would be around, I would tell them. I'd be like, man, y'all chill. Stop doing that.
Troy Washington:And it was forever for me to stop this kid from being afraid of flies, bro. Like, every time my barbecue flies are gonna come. It's just kinda how that money goes. Right? And it it he would not I'm talking about terrified of them.
Troy Washington:And, you know, trying to help someone reset that is, a very, very big, big deal or is a very challenging thing to do. So I I definitely cosign with how you inherit those type of behaviors based off what was presented to you from the very beginning.
JClay:Right. And and and and to that point, I think you oppose the question too, like, why is it so hard for people to accept these things is because, again, like, it's out of practice. They they practice the other mindset that they never thought about that it could be a different way that why am I why do I behave like this? Why do I react like this? Like, I I was taught this way, but does it really serve me?
JClay:Do I do I wanna continue acting this way? And you always have that choice.
Troy Washington:So so this is the challenge though. And I and I I I love where we where we are in this conversation, because we've asked some open question, both of us. And then the challenge for me is, for everybody, is to whenever you have a reaction, whether it be a good or bad reaction because I don't want it to I don't know want it to all just be tied to things that we have a negative reaction to. I want it to be tied to every reaction that we have. When something happens and you have a reaction, ask yourself, why am I reacting this way?
Troy Washington:Whether you'd be superly excited or you'd be superly down or the way you perceive something. Ask yourself, where does it derive from? And try to try to utilize a different reaction to see how you feel about it. Go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. I love that. Because that that that's part of it. Like, just observing yourself or even observing yourself as you're doing the reaction. Like, I am fully committed to this reaction, but I don't even know if I should be.
JClay:Do I really feel it? I'm not this upset, or I'm not this distraught by by what's going on. Like, yeah. It's it's it's it's an interesting thing. I I yeah.
JClay:Like, to your other point, I've even watched myself in spurts of joy. Like, if I just like, yes. Man, I knew that was gonna happen. It was just like I'm just real happy. I watch myself like, am I really this happy?
JClay:Is this yes. I really am this happy. Keep celebrating. And it it's a it's a beautiful thing.
Troy Washington:Yeah, man. Like, I I guess I I love the turn of the conversation. And, you know, again, to to to bring it in perspective when we're talking about monitoring your reactions, The same thing whenever you're, when you're dealing with other people. Right? When somebody's giving you something, you know, your body language is as important as the way that you, you know, orally respond to somebody.
Troy Washington:Like, when somebody says something that you feel like you would is disappointing to you, try to have an upbeat body language and see if you because, again, you can change that person's perspective in it in a moment as well. But not only that, just, you know, changing the way that you think about it, the way that you respond can literally just alternate your entire world. Go ahead, Dank.
JClay:Yeah. Because because, yeah, those conversations and and relationships, they they really are a mirror to the mirror. Like, it is they they get you in a way that you can't deny it. You can't miss the lesson there or you can miss it. But the the reason certain situations happen over and over again is because you are missing that lesson that they are presenting.
JClay:And and, again, like, sometimes it's hard for people it's not hard. Sometimes people find it difficult to separate the meaning from their own dislike of the person. And when you realize that one doesn't have to do with with the other, like, every conversation can can can have its wisdom. You would get a lot whether you like the person or not. Hopefully, but you would learn to like them.
JClay:Like, oh, they never did anything wrong. That was just my judgment of them, which was based on some other judgments that I held on to, which were not necessarily true. But go ahead.
Troy Washington:True true story. I'm a say this real quick. There's a kid no. There's a man that I was in high school with that had a problem with me in high school. I never knew what the problem was, but we just never we never talked.
Troy Washington:Like, after a while, like, it was a a a a big confrontation that happened. And then, you know, 3 years, maybe 10 years out, I tried to friend them on Facebook, denied my friend request. And my 20 year reunion, I, you know, was trying to say what's up. Ignore me. Right?
Troy Washington:Now, again, this is a testament to the way that you react, the way that you receive it, and the way that you continue to move forward. Well, my 25 year reunion was this past past week, and I saw this person again. And I walked to the table because everybody at the table I know. And then this person, I just went to them just like I went to everybody else, and I shook their hand. And they shook my hand for the first time.
Troy Washington:And the funny thing is for the rest of the reunion, I ain't gonna say we were this tight, but we was cool. And I could just imagine had I bought into it the way that we're talking about for the rest of my life, there's a part of me that would have remained in that place and that's the way that it would be. So go ahead, Jay.
JClay:Yeah. And it and it's like, why why would you like, even from his standpoint, why would you give someone that much power to just alter your mood? That just means, like, you could just be so happy. You come in contact with that person, I can't be happy around you. Like, what?
JClay:That's that's, like, that's so crazy to me that it's not even worth all of that, and and I love that you shared that.
Troy Washington:Yeah. So, I just wanna tell everybody, you know, know it and show it. Like Jay Clay said, like, you know, you are who you say you are. It's just that simple. And, you know, the reality of it is the outside factors that we always allowed to affect the inside factors and dictate what we see and the way that we move.
Troy Washington:You control all that too. Show go and show people your world consists of and it will be real. And, you know, I just wanna tell everybody I appreciate you for joining us without y'all. We would not be doing this show. We'll be doing something because we're gonna continue to grow.
Troy Washington:But we definitely appreciate you being here because this makes our world better. That's a core belief of mine, and that's the thing that I try to show is why I try to show up as much as we can. And, you know, Jay, you can go ahead and take us up out of here, man.
JClay:Yeah. Appreciate everybody that that rock with us. If you found this helpful, hit that share button, like, subscribe, all that good stuff. And just remember, your perfect creation made by a perfect creator, so you might as well accept your perfection and enter perfect mode. If I reminded you that you are perfect, would you argue me down or step into your perfection perfection perfection?
JClay:Welcome to perfect welcome to perfect where there are no excuses, no expectations, and we explore the world without limitations. I'm Jay Clay, rapper, the spiritual teacher, with my cohost Troy Washington, your friendly neighborhood realtor. Let's be real. So let's be perfect. Let's be perfect.
JClay:Perfect.
Troy Washington:Everything, anything, anything, anything, anything, perfect. Everything, anything, anything, anything, perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect.