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Happening in Upland is your weekly rundown of what’s going on around town—local news, community events, public safety updates, new restaurants, development, weather, schools, and the stuff Upland residents actually talk about.
Delivered with humor, honesty, and a very local point of view, this isn’t stiff broadcast news. It’s real, relevant information with personality. If you live in Upland or anywhere nearby in the Inland Empire, this is your weekly shortcut to staying in the loop.
JOLEEN: Welcome to another glorious Tuesday in Upland, the city that promised us 'Gracious Living' but usually just delivers a weird smell from the 10 freeway and a lot of people who don't know how to use a four-way stop. I'm Joleen, your favorite upbeat cynic, and I'm currently wondering if 'gracious' is just a fancy word for 'we've run out of money to fix the potholes'.
MARK: And I'm Mark, your composed voice of reason, or at least the guy who's been sarcasm-poisoned by living here long enough to find a plane flipping over at Cable Airport more predictable than my morning coffee. It's Tuesday, June 16, 2026, and we're here to tell you everything that's going on in this concrete paradise we call home. We're your hosts for 'Happening in Upland', where the news is weird, the people are weirder, and the local government is probably still trying to find that 1.1 million dollar hole in the budget.
JOLEEN: Before we get into the actual shit-show of the week, don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a comment telling us why we're wrong about everything. Or don't. I'm not your mother, but if you want to reach us with your complaints or some actual news for once, hit us up at upland@thehappeningnetwork.com. We might read it, we might just use it to light a fire under the city manager's ass. It depends on the mood.
MARK: Speaking of fire, let's jump into the top headlines. Apparently, flying a plane is hard, who knew? We had a small Cessna aircraft decide that landing on its wheels was just too mainstream at Cable Airport. It overturned on a hillside during takeoff. Now, Joleen, I've seen some bad parking jobs at the Colonies Crossroads, but this takes the fucking cake.
JOLEEN: It's a bold artistic statement, Mark. Why land normally when you can flip the bird to physics? Luckily, it looks like everyone walked away, but I'm betting that pilot is going to have some explaining to do to the insurance company. 'Oh, you know, the ground just jumped up and bit me.' It's typical Upland chaos. We've got planes falling over and people still trying to figure out if that 32 million dollar SuperLotto ticket from the Circle K has been claimed yet. Can you imagine having 32 million bucks and still living in Upland? I'd be in Tahiti by Tuesday night, leaving this heat behind.
MARK: I'd probably just buy the airport and ban flipping planes. But seriously, the lottery win is huge, and it's basically the only thing keeping the hope alive for people buying scratchers at every 7-Eleven on Foothill. In other 'I can't believe this is happening' news, we have to talk about the massive cocaine bust. A K-9 officer outdid every human on the force this week by sniffing out 66 pounds of hidden cocaine during a traffic stop. 66 pounds, Joleen. That's not just a weekend in Vegas; that's half of Upland's high society on a Tuesday night.
JOLEEN: That dog deserves a goddamn steak and a promotion. Imagine being the dickhead driver who thinks he's being subtle with 66 pounds of blow in the trunk, only to get outsmarted by a Labrador. It's embarrassing. This happened just a few days ago, part of a bigger sweep to clean up the transit corridors. I'm just surprised they didn't find the missing city budget funds while they were at it. But hey, crime doesn't pay, unless you're the one selling the lottery tickets, apparently.
MARK: And on the subject of things going wrong, our crime report for the week isn't just about drugs. We had a boat fire out at Lake Elsinore over the weekend, which isn't Upland, but since half the town drags their mid-life crisis toys out there every Saturday, it's worth a mention. Three people were injured. It's a reminder that water and gasoline are a spicy mix. Locally, we've had the usual string of 'why are you like this' arrests. A guy was picked up on June 9th for a field sobriety test and failed so hard it made the regional news. I'm telling you, people think because it's June, the rules of the road just vanish like our sanity.
JOLEEN: The rules of the road in Upland are merely suggestions, Mark. You know that. It's like the stop signs on Euclid--people think they're just red octagons for decoration. And don't get me started on the police seeking that suspect who pulled a knife on an ice cream shop worker. Who the fuck threatens an ice cream person? They're the only people in this city bringing pure joy, and some asshole wants to play tough with a blade? I hope they catch that dickhead and force-feed him frozen yogurt until he brain-freezes into a coma.
MARK: It's the heat, Joleen. It makes people insane. Let's pivot to something slightly less depressing--or maybe more, depending on how you feel about teenagers. The Upland Unified School District just wrapped up its graduation season. The Class of 2026 is officially out in the world. I'm sure they're all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, unaware that the median home price in their hometown is currently sitting at over 850,000 dollars. Welcome to adulthood, kids. You're broke already.
JOLEEN: They're not broke yet, Mark. They've still got that graduation money from their grandparents to blow on overpriced coffee and bad decisions. But seriously, the district is moving into summer mode. While the kids are away, the adults are fighting over the budget deficits we've talked about before. It's the same old story. At least the high school got that 'California Distinguished School' title earlier this year, so at least they're smart enough to know they can't afford to live here after college.
MARK: It's a beautiful cycle of education and immediate relocation. Now, let's talk about something that actually matters: food. Since we've already covered almost every classic steakhouse and kebab joint in the zip code, I wanted to talk about a little gem that people often overlook because they're too busy staring at the historic architecture on 2nd Avenue. I'm talking about the 2nd Avenue Saloon. It's not fancy, it's not 'gracious', and that's why I love it.
JOLEEN: Oh, the Saloon. The place where dreams go to get a light buzz on a Tuesday afternoon. I've been there. The vibe is very 'I might have a warrant out for my arrest, but I also make a mean burger'. Their wings are actually decent, and the beer is cold, which is all you can ask for when the outside temperature is threatening to melt your tires. It's the antithesis of the Heights or the Sycamore Inn. No one's wearing a tie there unless they're coming from a funeral or a court date.
MARK: Exactly. It's honest. You walk in, you get a solid sandwich, you deal with the sarcastic bartender, and you leave feeling like you haven't been robbed. It's a nice change of pace from the overpriced 'gastropubs' popping up everywhere. If you want a place to complain about the city council while eating fries that have actually seen a deep fryer, that's the spot. Just don't expect them to have a 'kale and quinoa' salad. They'd probably laugh you out of the building.
JOLEEN: God, I hope they would. If I see one more quinoa bowl in this town, I'm moving to Ontario. Let's check in on sports, because apparently, people are still doing physical activity despite the humidity. The Upland Highlanders football team is already looking toward the fall. We've got the 2026 calendar outlined. The first game is set for August 22nd at La Habra. I know it's only June, but in this town, football is a religion, and the off-season is just a time to yell at your kids in the backyard.
MARK: They've got a tough schedule this year. Charter Oak, Villa Park, Summit--it's a gauntlet. But hey, the Scots have been working out, and the 'Pound the Rock' mentality is in full swing. On a broader scale, we're right in the middle of the NBA and NHL Finals. If you haven't been keeping up, ESPN's coverage is everywhere right now. It's the best time of year for people who like to scream at their TVs while drinking cheap beer. We're also seeing the fallout from the Stanley Cup finals. It's a busy June for anyone who cares about trophies.
JOLEEN: I only care about trophies if they're filled with margaritas, Mark. But I guess the Highlanders deserve some credit for training in this weather. Speaking of the weather, we need to address the fact that Upland is currently trying to cook us all alive. Let's look at the forecast for the next week, thanks to the National Weather Service, because unlike the city's budget, these numbers actually make sense.
MARK: Today, Tuesday, we're looking at a high of 89. It's sunny, it's hot, and the wind is kicking up a bit with gusts as high as 25 miles per hour. So, if you have a toupee or a loose patio umbrella, good luck. Tonight it drops to a nice 62. Wednesday is more of the same, high of 87, plenty of sun. It's basically a preview of the hell we'll endure in July and August.
JOLEEN: Thursday brings us a bit of a break, and by 'break', I mean it's only 81 degrees. We'll have some patchy fog in the morning, which is Upland's version of a spa day. Friday, which is Juneteenth, we're looking at a perfect 79. It's a holiday, it's sunny, and it's not quite hot enough to make you want to punch a stranger. The weekend follows suit--Saturday is 78, Sunday is 79. It's actually a pretty decent Father's Day weekend forecast. Then Monday it starts creeping back up to 83. So, enjoy the sub-80 temperatures while they last, because they're as rare as a functioning escalator at the mall.
MARK: It's actually a very pleasant stretch of weather for mid-June. No excuses not to get out and do something, unless you're like me and your favorite outdoor activity is walking from the car to the air-conditioned office. If you are heading out, watch out for the road construction. The Foothill Boulevard rehabilitation project is still a massive pain in the ass. They're working on infrastructure upgrades and paving, so expect lane shifts and the general feeling that you're trapped in a maze designed by a sadist.
JOLEEN: The 14th Street project is also lingering in the background. It's like the city decides which road to fix by throwing a dart at a map and then leaving the cones there for six months to see what happens. If you're commuting, just double your travel time and prepare your best curse words. You'll need them. And while you're sitting in traffic, take a look at the 'For Sale' signs. Real estate in Upland is still a joke. We're seeing median list prices hovering around 855,000 dollars, but some of those San Antonio Heights estates are still hitting that four million dollar mark. It's a great market if you're a billionaire or a drug-sniffing dog with a high-paying side hustle.
MARK: It's definitely not a buyer's market for the rest of us mortals. But hey, that's the price of 'Gracious Living', right? You pay a premium to live near a mountain that's occasionally on fire and an airport where the planes like to nap on their backs. Let's move on to the weekend guide. Since it's Father's Day this Sunday, June 21st, there are plenty of local ways to celebrate your old man without just buying him another 'World's Best Dad' mug that he'll never use.
JOLEEN: Just take him to the 2nd Avenue Saloon and buy him a beer. He'll appreciate it more than a tie. But seriously, Friday is Juneteenth, a federal holiday. City offices will be closed, so don't go trying to pay your water bill or complain about your neighbor's overgrown lawn on Friday. There are community gatherings planned in the Inland Empire to celebrate the day, focusing on history and freedom, which is a nice change of pace from the usual 'buy a mattress' holiday vibes.
MARK: Saturday is also the start of some of the summer park programs. Memorial Park usually has something going on, though the big concert series kicks off later. It's a good weekend to just hit the local trails or explore the Cooper Museum if you want to stay indoors and pretend you're cultured. Just check the local listings for Father's Day brunches. Every restaurant in a five-mile radius is going to be packed with people pretending they like their fathers-in-law.
JOLEEN: Ugh, brunch. The most overrated meal in history. 'Let's wait an hour for cold eggs and a watery mimosa'. No thanks. I'll stay home and yell at the squirrels. But for those of you who actually enjoy social interaction, Upland has plenty of options. Just remember that if you're out celebrating, don't be that guy from June 9th who ended up in the back of a squad car. Upland PD is going to be out in force this weekend looking for drunk drivers. They've got that new K-9 now, and he's clearly looking for a reason to show off again.
MARK: I'm telling you, that dog is the star of the show. If he starts wearing sunglasses and giving interviews, I'm retiring. Before we wrap this up, let's circle back to the 'Notable News' from the city manager's office. They've been pushing the UplandConnect app pretty hard lately. It's supposed to be the easiest way to report potholes, graffiti, or people flipping planes at the airport. I'm skeptical of anything that ends in 'Connect', but apparently, they're actually responding to tickets now.
JOLEEN: I'll believe it when I see a pothole on Mountain Avenue actually get filled within a week. Until then, the app is just a way for me to scream into the digital void. But hey, it's better than nothing. It's a small step toward a city that functions like it's 2026 and not 1985. We've got a long way to go, but at least we've got cocaine-sniffing dogs and lucky lottery winners to keep things interesting.
MARK: It really is a unique ecosystem here. From the historic charm of the downtown area to the absolute chaos of Foothill Boulevard, Upland is a town that never quite knows if it wants to be a quiet suburb or a setting for a weird indie movie. And that's why we love it--or at least why we can't stop talking about it. It's a mess, but it's our mess.
JOLEEN: It's a beautiful, expensive, sun-baked mess. And that's the episode for this Tuesday, June 16, 2026. Thanks for listening to 'Happening in Upland', where we give you the news straight up with a side of total disbelief. Don't forget to reach out to us at upland@thehappeningnetwork.com if you've got a story, a gripe, or if you're the person who won that 32 million dollars and want to buy us some lunch at the Saloon.
MARK: Yeah, we're very open to bribes. Or just good tips. Either way, stay safe out there, watch out for flipping planes, and for the love of god, use your turn signals. We'll be back next week to tell you what other chaos has descended upon the City of Gracious Living. Until then, try not to melt.
JOLEEN: Stay cynical, Upland. And don't forget to subscribe, because if you don't, the city council wins. And nobody wants that. Bye, you beautiful bastards.
MARK: Goodnight and good luck. You're going to need it if you're driving on Foothill today.
JOLEEN: Actually, it's 10:23 AM, Mark. It's morning. Your internal clock is as broken as the streetlights on 11th. But whatever. We're done here. Let's go get some of those wings.
MARK: Wings it is. See you next week.