SJ Lawyer: The Look that led to The One

When SJ agreed to be the event decorator for her friend's wedding, she had no idea it would lead her to the love of her life. As she navigated the stresses of planning the elaborate 180-person affair, SJ found herself instantly drawn to the caterer, John. Despite initial reservations, their undeniable chemistry and connection grew stronger throughout the chaotic wedding day. 
What started as a chance meeting between two people working the same event quickly blossomed into something much more. As SJ grappled with the end of a long-term relationship, she couldn't deny the pull she felt towards John. Their story is a whirlwind romance, filled with mishaps, laughter, and the magic of finding an unexpected soulmate in the most unlikely of places - a wedding. 

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So tell me about this wedding. Which one we'll get to yours? Yeah, we'll get to yours later.

SJ Lawyer 2:14
The wedding, I met the one at

Matt Sodnicar 2:16
the one, the one, the one,

SJ Lawyer 2:20
so I guess I have to back up before the wedding, because there's pre wedding. I was, well, yeah, I've got a group of friends. Had a group of friends, I should say we're all pretty tight knit, pretty close, really cool group of friends. And this couple is getting married. I'm gonna leave names out just for you know, sure

Matt Sodnicar 2:44
legal reasons. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 2:47
they they've been together since, like, high school, so they've been high school, high school sweethearts, and they finally got married, or decided to get married. I was dead set on, like, I knew I was going to be a bridesmaid. I was like, Oh yeah, I'm going to make the bridesmaid crew. Like, this is awesome. I haven't been a bridesmaid in so long, since my sister's wedding. This is awesome. And then I didn't get asked. I was like, what you you got this girl as your bridesmaid over me? I thought we were closer, you know, the whole like, caddy, caddy caddy. But as I am, I was just like, hey, that's cool. No worries. And she she knew I had this love for event planning, and I love decorating, and I love doing all these weddings. So she's like, will you be my event person? So I was like, Yeah, I don't know that means, but I'll do it. Yeah, I want to be a part of this, because I still think you're a friend, and this is awesome. And I love being involved, because I'm the baby of the family. That's just who I am. Like, I need to be involved in something. So she brought me on as her like, decorator for the wedding. So we spent,

Matt Sodnicar 3:56
was this a paid gig? No, okay, completely

SJ Lawyer 3:58
free. All right, just time, because that's that's who you are. That's who I am. So we spent months planning it out, from table decoration to actually making the table decoration to how's the arch going to look? How's this section of the wedding going to look? How's this going to be like, every aspect you can think of for a wedding I was in charge. Even

Matt Sodnicar 4:20
describing that gives me stress, because I'm not the detail person. I'm the big picture person, right? Keep going. That was

SJ Lawyer 4:27
details. That's the thing. Is, details. That's where it's at for me is I'm like, You give me a detail. I'm like, I love it. I thrive on details. Okay? It's a whole, whole other thing. But so I was like, let's do this. This is great. So I planned it all out, and it comes to few days before the wedding. And I was like, Well, I'm driving a Saturn four door, I don't know. SS one series. Don't even make Saturns anymore. No, it's like, I can't fit any of this. My car. So how am I going to get all this decoration stuff to your wedding? And she's like, Oh, well, just, just borrow my forerunner. Actually, I should back up because there is a pre history. Yeah, good. Okay, good. So a month before everything's everything's figured out, I just had a few more, few more decoration stuff I'd finish up. But a month before, I was like, Hey, can we do a walkthrough? Because I don't like designing things and doing details when I don't know the space and I didn't know what I'm working with, sure. So I was like, Hey, let's do a walkthrough. And this the wedding took place at Planet bluegrass, which is up in lions. So it's like $20,000 to rent that place. So it's, like, super expensive. So she's like, Yeah, let's do, let's do a walk through, and we'll bring the caterers. So I was like, Cool, cool, cool, like, whatever. So we go up there, and it's like, nine in the morning, because I still go to work the next or that day. So it's up, you know, planting food grass, some a little chilly. So had my my red jacket zipped all the way up. I had my son, he's on because it's bright outside, and we do this walk through, and the caters are there. And I recognize them because they also have the corn dog food truck. I was like, oh, yeah, yeah. I know these guys. I don't know them, but I, like, know them because I see them, yeah, type of No, like, I don't know their names or anything, but I feel like I know them without knowing them. So and I was like, and the the blonde haired one, he's really cute, but I knew that there was, like, history there with another girl. So I was like, He's He's taken, he's kind of drama, whatever,

Matt Sodnicar 6:43
lots of incidents. Yeah. I

SJ Lawyer 6:45
was like, I don't know if I want to touch that. So we do his walk through. It was really fun. And the other guy, his name's Jake. Actually, I said I was gonna say, names doesn't matter. His name doesn't matter.

Matt Sodnicar 6:56
Beep, yeah, his

SJ Lawyer 6:59
name's what. He was super, like, flirty and just like, what's going on, like, just trying to, like, hey, hey, hey, the whole time. And I thought he was super childish. I was like, What is this? Is this your form of flirting? Because I'm way too cool for this. I had no idea what's going on, but he had very soft brown eyes and, like, long eyelashes. So when he looks at you, he just has this like, Hey, my name's beep, you know, like, I'm really I'm really cool. You should probably like, Come home with me. And I just remember looking at him thinking, like, you are utter childness, like

Matt Sodnicar 7:42
wu wei so like, so brief tangent. So I'm trying to understand, maybe all women's minds, but to your mind, right? So you think this guy's childish, but the eyes and the eyelashes, so where does that tip scales for him? Like,

SJ Lawyer 8:00
childish, but his eyes, and then for most women, it probably the childness goes away and they're like, swooned by the eyes. Oh, all right, because he has soft, welcoming eyes, is what I like to That's it. Like, I don't find him attractive or interesting. I found him just annoying. You guys laugh. Guys, great. Like, high

Matt Sodnicar 8:22
five, okay, like, All right, keep going. Thank you. That was like, I wanted to know how All right, yeah.

SJ Lawyer 8:26
So apparently, according to John, I can say his name, future, present, current,

Matt Sodnicar 8:33
he signed a waiver. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 8:36
I wear my sunglasses the whole entire walkthrough. I thought I took him off, but his point of view is that I never took him off. So I'm this mysterious girl with these sunglasses on that looks really cute to him, and I have this red jacket on,

Matt Sodnicar 8:51
which is maybe you've got brown eyes, and long last, right? He had no idea. And he's just

SJ Lawyer 8:55
like, Who is this? A serious chick. She seems super rad. Like, I'm into her also, so that's his point of view. But then we did this walkthrough, and then I get in the car to go back, and I was talking to the bride, and I was like, Dude, that that beep guy. We learned the names. I was like, dude. He is He is stupid. I was like, he's really, like, just annoying. I was like the other one, though he's pretty cute. So that was that moving on. When I went to the bachelorette party, went long, living life. Nothing to really come of John and his employee. No other thoughts. So then it comes to back to where I was, where I had a Saturn vehicle. So then all of a sudden the ride, she's like, Here, take my forerunner. Drive my forerunner, just we can stack as much stuff as possible in the forerunner. And I was loving this, because I've always wanted a forerunner. I was like, Oh my gosh, this is the best we can ever I'm driving a forerunner. And I have this thing packed full with all the things I made and design like, this is a really good feeling. So the morning of I woke up feeling super, super rested, super excited, just like, pumped. Like, let's do this wedding. I'm so excited to do this wedding and blow everyone away. I don't need a bridesmaid. I decorated this whole place. Like, this wedding is half mine, you know. So that was like, my mindset. It was like, This is great. Let's go.

Matt Sodnicar 10:30
What were the decorations?

SJ Lawyer 10:31
So I had a photo booth. I always start with that because it's easiest, really cool, shimmery background photo booth with popsicle sticks with their faces on it. So, like, they had, I think I had four different facial expressions for both the bride and the groom, and I cut their heads out, like, blew them up, cut them out, put them on popsicle sticks so people could, like, pose with them. Oh, in the photo booth. Yeah, in the photo booth. Um, plus other fun, fun types of things. Didn't have photo booth, um, I did the whole table runners and the table numbers so every they had. So this wedding was 180 people, wow, by the way, which is quite a

Matt Sodnicar 11:12
lot of people, that big for a wedding. I feel like that's really okay wedding.

SJ Lawyer 11:15
Um, that's, that's a lot of people to feed, a lot of people to manage. What people to control with alcohol. It's, it's, it's a mess. Um, so I did these really cool so the the groom is a fly fisherman, and I thought it would be really cool to combine fly fishing with what the bride loves, which is she loves everything. It's really hard to pinpoint one thing she loves. But we did eucalyptus along all the tables. Oh, so set up family style. So they're the rectangle tables that are just, I don't know, they had a couple of them in a row, like four of them in a row, and then everyone just sat there. And so we put eucalyptus on all the tables, and then we had a brown bottle, which I don't know if it was a beer bottle. I can't remember anymore where I got them, but they're just the brown bottles. And then I used, I also can't quite remember if I use a stick or what I used. I think I used some sort of material, but I mimicked a fishing rod. So I have, oh, cool, like fishing rod coming out of this bottle, and at the end of the rod was hanging one of the tie like a fly, a flight, a fly, a fly, a tied

SJ Lawyer 12:27
fly. Yeah, a fly.

SJ Lawyer 12:28
Let's call it that. It's much easier to fly. My dad's actually a fly fisherman, so he's pretty into this. I should know this better, but he's huge into it. The groom is into fly fishing, so he has all these flies, and I put them on the end of this mimicked fishing rod, okay? And then I made each number for which tables which, because guests had to be like, Hey, I'm sitting at table nine. Okay, table nine. So it's, here's this fishing rod with a nine on the end and then a an actual fly. How cool? Yeah,

Matt Sodnicar 13:06
it looked really rad. Was the eucalyptus? The water? Was it?

SJ Lawyer 13:10
No, that was just laid out across the whole entire table. And then she also, the bride, was really big on having her own China wear. So I'm like, All right, you got, you got 180 people, and you want to have your own chinaware. That's, that's a lot. We're gonna get that. So her, her mom, her soon to be mother in law, cousins, aunts, like everyone, went to every goodwill antique store and got plates. Okay,

Matt Sodnicar 13:39
so she didn't have 180 servings.

SJ Lawyer 13:42
Oh, like she wanted her own plates, okay, for everything, but she wanted them to be mixed matched, yeah. So it was like, All right, do you like? That's a lot. So I have that. So I had the silverware, the dishware, the napkins, the tabletop stuff, all the stuff for the photo booth, all the stuff for the arch to get married under, for the happy hour area, and all the decorations to fill that up, which are just fun pictures of bride and the groom. I can't remember what else I did. Tons of, tons of just like things to just fill, fill the room and the space to look and feel like, Hey, this is the bride and groom's

Matt Sodnicar 14:26
wedding. Like, this is cool, so personal and intimate. Yeah, exactly, yeah. And

SJ Lawyer 14:30
I had these huge, giant tears that were supposed to be for the dessert. So this vehicle is packed. I'm

Matt Sodnicar 14:40
trying to play mental Tetris with what you've like even 180 plates right? Like

SJ Lawyer 14:46
I took a picture of it right before I left that morning, I was like, here we go. Look at this back trunk. This is packed. You can't get anything else in here. It is so packed. So I had a friend in town who's also going to the wedding. I. Yeah, and she had volunteered to be my help for the day. Like, hey, I'll help you set up decorations and do that stuff, and her husband was going to meet her up there. I was like, Cool. This is great, because I can't physically, probably do everything myself. I think that I always can. And then I realized that this is a big task to set up a whole entire wedding on my own, and I have a few hours to do it. So I was like, I need help. I am not sleeping. Woman yet. Yeah, right. So she goes with me, and I pick her up at 10. We got coffees in her hand, and we were just like, let's pick the best music. We're gonna get so pumped up for us. This is the best day ever. So we're driving up to lions, from where? From Fort Collins. Okay, so I think, I think I picked her up, yeah, I think I picked her up, and we're driving, everything's great. And then we get to about five minutes from the venue, and there's backed up traffic. I think nothing of it. I'm just like, cool, cool, this is just traffic. This is Colorado. Everyone moves here, and it's a weekend, a beautiful weekend in September. Yeah, into September when it's wedding. Leaf peepers. Yeah. So I was like, this is perfect leap leaf peeking season. It was like the 21st of September. Oh, yeah. So we're sitting there, and we continue to sit there and sit there longer, and all of a sudden my anxiety is just like through the roof. Why are we sitting here? I have a job to do. I have a whole entire vehicle full of everything that needs to be at this venue that is five minutes from here. So I'm like, kind of losing my cool because I don't know what to do. And my breakfast was coffee and ever so I don't know what to do. And my friend, who's with me is very chill. She's from, she's from, not here, so she's just like, super chill, relaxed. Like, I don't know what the big deal is, and I'm like, Oh my gosh, I am getting very upset because you're too chill and I'm losing it, and you're telling me to be chill. And I do not know how to do this. We've, we've got some food coming, huh? All the good stuff, some appetizers from the John, some

Matt Sodnicar 17:20
stuff. Spoiler alert.

SJ Lawyer 17:24
That's where the that's where the table is. Whoa.

Matt Sodnicar 17:32
I need a picture of this

SJ Lawyer 17:35
because we're needing to let the listeners understand what just is happening before i

Matt Sodnicar 17:42
Yeah, we are being served a Mexican street corn, yeah, something like

SJ Lawyer 17:53
that. It's a birya Beef tartare over some

SJ Lawyer 17:59
polenta with some

Speaker 1 18:01
fry roasted corn, kind of like a Mexican street corn, style with a miso cream, the corn, cilantro, Kyoto, some seasonings.

SJ Lawyer 18:13
Yeah, some orange egg, some

SJ Lawyer 18:15
crackers.

Matt Sodnicar 18:16
Thank you. This

SJ Lawyer 18:17
is not what was served at the wedding. No, no,

Matt Sodnicar 18:24
he's fine. Thank you.

SJ Lawyer 18:35
Let's try this before I take another breath. Yeah, I don't know. Good luck. Thanks, buddy. We're good. Yeah,

Matt Sodnicar 18:44
we're diving into Okay, where was I losing my cool? Yeah, yeah, your friend's super calm. You're not You're full of coffee.

SJ Lawyer 18:58
45 minutes of sitting, sitting, all right, just sitting, and all of a sudden, the firefighter, he comes. He's like, walking down the line.

Matt Sodnicar 19:08
What color were his eyes?

SJ Lawyer 19:11
I couldn't tell you, actually, because I was so full of anxiety that I was just like, you're a blob. To me, you're speaking blob telling me something I don't want to hear. So he essentially told us that there was a a telephone pole just up the road that fell on a dumpster truck and it was stuck, oh my God, and they weren't gonna get it moved for roughly an hour or more, maybe

Matt Sodnicar 19:41
two hours. Okay, so eta to the wedding at this point is what

SJ Lawyer 19:45
the wedding start time? I believe was, three o'clock, okay? And

Matt Sodnicar 19:50
what time is this now? At

SJ Lawyer 19:51
11 o'clock, okay. So I was like, Okay, well, I have, I have a decision to make. I was like, I have to either, I have to either, thanks for the lines on like, I have to either sit here and wait for however long it's going to take for them to open the road or find an alternative route. Yeah,

Matt Sodnicar 20:22
because you're just not having to get there, you've got to set everything up exactly yes, at the table, set the All right.

SJ Lawyer 20:29
So I'm at this point, like, the cool that I thought I lost, like it was even more lost, stressing. So I don't want to call the bride, who's my friend, because I don't want to freak her out. But hey, remember that wedding that we're doing today? Yeah, I'm stuck, and all your guests are stuck, and no one can get there. Oh, the guests too. That's right, yeah. So I was like, hey, surprise. So, like, I don't be the bearer of bad news, so I call the groom because he's way more chill than she is. I'm like, yo, here's the situation. I can't make it because there's a telephone pole dump truck. Sounds really dumb, but I can't get there. So I don't know what I should do. Should I wait? Should I go an alternative route? Is there a better way to get there? What do I do? And he looked at a map, and he's like, I Well, it's up to you point. I hate that answer. So he's like, you can either drive a different way and get there in an hour and a half to two hours, or you sit and wait for them to open the road and get there in an hour and a half, two hours. So usually dice, you figure out what you need to do. So then I call my dad, because, Dad, I need help. I don't know what to do in this situation. He knows roads and maps and stuff. So I was like, maybe help me. Help. Oh, yeah. Like, tell me what to do, dad. Like, that's your job.

Matt Sodnicar 21:59
Eye in the Sky, right? Yeah.

SJ Lawyer 22:00
So he he tells me, essentially the same thing the groom said he was like, Oh my gosh, I should have called a woman. My mom should have told me what to do. So at this point, I have to pee so bad. Of course, I had only coffee and so I pull over, I turn around, because we all just turn the cars around. So I turned around, and I pulled over next to the river because there's nowhere to the bathroom. And I'm like, I'm not gonna sit here and pee in my pants. So I pull over next to the river, and I go down to the river and I pee because I'm like, I can't think when I have to pee. Like, right? Like, I don't even know. Rule number one in my life, you have to make a decision, go to the bathroom first. Yeah, you're gonna clear your mind when you clear your batter ladder. So peeing down in this beautiful river, thinking

Matt Sodnicar 23:00
about today and what is wait in the river by the river. Okay, it's

SJ Lawyer 23:07
a beautiful mountain creek. And then I made a decision, let's, let's take the long run. Let's, let's get in the car and drive. Because if I want to sit here, I want to be full of even more anxiety knowing that I'm wasting time than if I'm in a car driving, I'm at least doing something, I would

Matt Sodnicar 23:23
do that same thing. Yeah, you're taking action. You've got some exactly even perceived control of the situation, right?

SJ Lawyer 23:29
And you're not just sitting there wondering if you made the right decision or not. Yeah, because it didn't open and I was having less time because I'm sitting there, I would have been even more of a rep, yeah. So made decision to drive around, which is, there's only one way to go from lions to the other side of lions, and that's like to turn around and go down through Nederland, oh, yeah, and then cut back up and cut through all these gravel roads. So I am driving like a maniac. I'm just like, I have to get there as fast as possible. If the cop pulls me over, or this is my sob story. I'm thinking all of this while driving crazy, all the details, yeah, my friend is like, holding on for dear life. And she's like, Oh, driving this fast. And I was like, Don't talk to me. This is Glover's death moment. I have to drive this fast. So driving around and it's gravel roads, I'm feeling like a badass driving this forerunner. I'm like, gotta get me one of these. Like, this is so much better my Saturn. I love this thing. So by time I get to the actual venue, the road opened. The groom's there. Okay, all these people are there. I'm like, how did you get here? They're like, we drove up, like, normal. I'm like, You mean you don't have to wait in line, like, they turn everyone away. Did they clear the road? And he's like, yeah, we've been here for like, an hour. Oh my gosh, I made the wrong decision. In I should have just waited, but in my mind, I knew that I had to make I had to roll the dice, and I had to do one or the other. But I was so mad at myself that I didn't just sit and wait, because everyone got through. But again, I would have beat myself up if I just waited and didn't go.

Matt Sodnicar 25:15
I think you did the right thing. Yeah, because you have to play. Yeah, there's the you ever heard the fighter pilot's prayer, yeah, yeah. Dear God, don't let me fuck this up. You were on a different clock than everybody else coming up to the reception, so I think you did the right thing,

SJ Lawyer 25:32
right? Mentally, I did the right thing, yeah, yeah. So I get up there, my clothes starts to settle because I'm like, All right, I'm here. I have an hour and a half to set up this whole entire wedding. I'm awesome. I can do this, right?

Matt Sodnicar 25:48
How much did you allocated, like, in your planning for this?

SJ Lawyer 25:50
Oh, at least three hours. Oh, all right, yeah. So that's why I was panicking a little, because I'm like, I'm losing time, like, my time the clock is ticking. So I started decorating, started doing things. I like, think I'm just this super badass person at not only details, but doing things in a hurry and getting it done well, because I get it out so well in my head. So I'm like, this goes here. This does this. This is so getting all set up. The problem was, I was like, I needed help from my friend. And I was like, I don't have the time to also babysit right now. And I thought I had more time to help, have you, like, hold your hand to say, hey, I need this done. I need this done. So I was like, Okay, I'm gonna put you in a task that was because of my reckless driving. All of the table centerpieces that were like, Hey, this is table nine with the fly on the end had fishing wire, and all of those got tangled. So I'm like, need you to untangle these. Like, this is a really important job, and I don't have time for the patience right now, right? So can you untangle and she's like, I'm terrified of needles. Flies is poking me, and I'm I'm not enjoying I don't want to do this. I'm not enjoying this. I was like, yeah, so cool. But like, do it anyway. Kind of just needed to just, like, help. So she sat there and she did it, and I came back to check on her later, and she had pulled in some aunt or someone to help her, because she was just like, I just don't like it. It just hurts. I was like, okay, whatever. I don't care. As long as the job's getting done, that's all that matters. I just need someone to do this if you don't want to do it, cool, like, I don't know, help someone else. So I managed to get everything set up, except for the arch for the wedding. Okay, I just was running out of time, and I didn't know how to get it set up, because I didn't have the time for that. So I had to pivot and think about a different way of decorating the arch in the moment, in the moment. So I told the mother of the groom what I envisioned. So this is what I want. And she's like, I don't think we have time for that. I said, Okay, well, here's the pivot. Can you maybe help me with the pivot? So she helped me with the pivot, and she helped me get it decorated. It is the one thing about the whole entire wedding that did not look good was the arch. But I'm like, Hey, everyone's staring at the bride and groom and the flowers and everyone else there like we're here for love. We're not here for how beautiful the arch looked, even though I do think it makes a difference, but whatever. So that was the only thing that just didn't get completed. So backing up just a little bit. I had five minutes before the wedding was going to start, and the coordinator. The coordinator comes up to me, and the coordinator was a friend as well, and she's from out of town, from California, and so she was there visiting, and she was like, Hey, I'm the coordinator. Are you all done? Like, can we start the wedding? It's going to start in five minutes. I'm like, let's be real. No. Wedding starts on the.of hey, it starts at 3pm Can we just be real here? Can we, like, Give me 10 more minutes or something to finish up and get dressed and everything, because I'm still in my sweats, sweating. Oh, no, there's, you know, no makeup on nothing. I look like a hot mess, and like, can you just, like, give me some time? And she's like, well, I'll give you, like, five minutes. That's Max I'm like, Oh my gosh. Um, so also, I forgot about John in this whole scenario.

Matt Sodnicar 29:35
So I forget about him. So

SJ Lawyer 29:37
while I'm getting things set up for this wedding, the caterers arrive, and John walks up, like, I see John, and we just start, like, walking towards each other. And I don't know, there's just something about John that made me feel comfort from the first time we met at the walkthrough, where I was like, Hey, he's cute. Yeah, there's some, like, Girl drama. I know that's going. On and like, I don't know, he just has this comfort vibe around him for me and to me, maybe it's because he wasn't childish with soft eyes dancing around me like the other guy.

Matt Sodnicar 30:12
I don't know, was he there that time? Yes, okay, he came back. Yeah.

SJ Lawyer 30:16
So we're walking towards each other through this field, and then we get, like, really close to each other, which, think about it like most people probably wouldn't come that close, not knowing each other. And we just get really close, and we're like, I was like, get this. This has been my morning. And so I told him everything, of like, Hey, I left at this time. All I had was coffee. There was a dump truck with the telephone pole on it. I had to pee. I peed in a river, by a river. Then I drove. And now I'm here, and I gave him the one two punch, and I just like, remember, like, it's so close, and he's just like, staring at me with complete like, Wow, that's amazing. And I'm like, Yeah, isn't that wild? And then I was like, anyway, glad you're here. I got stuff to do, and then I walk off. So

Matt Sodnicar 31:07
it's like, you guys clicked, and had known each other for years. That's like,

SJ Lawyer 31:11
we had this instant like, Hey, what's up, buddy? Yeah. So I was like, All right, whatever. So finished getting decorated all kinds of so there's five minutes into the wedding, and I realized I needed to put a dress on. I need adult stuff. So I grabbed my stuff. Well, I went to go grab my stuff, but the vehicle, the bride's vehicle that I was driving, got moved by the groom's brother, because they had to move vehicles for some reason, and then he gave the keys back to the bride instead of me. So here it is five minutes until the wedding starting, and I'm like, I need my I need my clothes, I need my makeup. I need everything. It's in a vehicle, and the vehicle is not where it left it, and I don't know who has the keys, and so I'm trying to run around finding who has the keys. Where is this vehicle? Where did it go? So finally, track it down to Oh, the bride has the key for some reason. And everyone's waiting on me at this point, because the whole wedding, I'm the only one that's not ready yet. Yeah. So I'm running around and I find the bride, and I'm like, hi, you look beautiful. Everyone looks beautiful. Do you have your keys? Keys to your vehicle that I drove up here? It's like, weird question. I know. I don't know where they went. Someone took them. I need them. I need my clothes. And so she's like, Oh my gosh, yes. I don't know why I have them. Here's my keys. So my cool, Google, cool. Take the keys, get my clothes, and the bathroom up there is powered, I think, by the solar panel, like my solar panel, so the light didn't actually come on until it's dark outside. So because it's three o'clock, the sun's still up, it's kind of dark in this bathroom, because the lighting is not great. So I'm like, awesome. I get to get dressed for a wedding in the dark. This is going to be great. So I put a dress on and don't know what my dog's saying, put my tried to put my makeup on in the dark, you know, did the best I could. I'm like, I'm, you know, I know what I'm doing by now. Yeah, I'm sure it looks fine, I'm sure. And then I walk out, and I'm like, Cool. Everything's good, right? Everything's great. And I get to the ceremony. I'm like, Okay, I'm set. Let's get the show on the road. So I sit down in the very last row because I'm just too full of anxiety still, and I'm like, I can't walk down this aisle and sit somewhere farther up. I should be able to run after this ceremony and finish something that maybe I just forgot that I so sitting in the back row, and this is a very important piece of information I should share. I had a boyfriend.

Matt Sodnicar 34:00
Way to bury the lead.

SJ Lawyer 34:02
His name is speed.

Matt Sodnicar 34:06
Was he there? Uh

SJ Lawyer 34:08
huh, he was there, and he was sitting. I was sitting next to him. I said, Hey, hi. How are you? It's been a stressful day. Hope your day's been better. Um, let's get this one in the room. So sitting next to him, and he's already annoyed with me, because I'm me, I'm full of anxiety. I'm just running all over the place like an ADHD person that can't, like, call myself. And he's like, just stop what you're doing. Just enjoy it like, that's not my job. My job is to decorate this place and make sure it's flawless for the bride.

Matt Sodnicar 34:42
You're not a guest. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 34:43
I'm like, I'm not a guest. I am doing a job. And if I get to enjoy myself, I'll enjoy myself, but I have a job show, and he didn't get that. So Red flag number 999 um, anyway, I. The Wedding happens. It was beautiful. I cried. Everyone cried. Lovely. The second it's done, I am bolting towards the bar. So I'm like, I need a stiff drink, stat. So I'm like, poor man, gin and tonic, because that's my go to drink. Let's get this show rib. So John is the caterer, and he has his which is called, like skillet catering, and he's up there with, I'm

Matt Sodnicar 35:28
gonna cut that part out. No, no free advertising. Oh, wait, well, I did get appetizers, alright, keep going. That's fine.

SJ Lawyer 35:40
So he's up there doing this really cool. I want to call it. He has a name for it, yakitori grill. Oh, it's called. He made his own yakutori grills because he's a man of I'm going to make it instead of buy it brand new, because why would I waste my money on something brand new that I could make? You know, so he made it. But I think there were some issues, as far as, like, one of them, like, caught on fire that they had to solve. I think they forgot tablecloths for some of the tables. Also, the coordinator set up everyone got a mug that was their mug for the night, for their all their beverages, and set up this whole wall of mugs, and this was like, where your your seating was, so you'd get your mug had your name on it, and said, Hey, you're sitting at this table. So it's a cool setup, but she set it up where the happy hour was supposed to be set up. So that was also a hiccup in the whole setup that John was like, what? But he pivoted, because that's what he does, and he got it all set. So it worked, even though there was a mini fire at one point and a mini like disaster, whatever. So that's all good. I'm drinking my gin. I am having such a better time because I have alcohol flowing through my system. Like, thank God there's alcohol. This gin is perfect. So the wedding carries on. It's what's the reception? Receptions going on. And I'm actually still running around making sure everything's good, everything's set. I'm just this, like turned perfectionist at this point. And then I noticed people are trying to take pictures, and the iPads not working, because we used an iPad on a tripod. Oh, for the photo booth. Yeah, for the photo booth. So then I'm like, I gotta fix it. Meanwhile, my boyfriend's like, oh my gosh, let it go. And I was like, I can't. If you can't take pictures, you can take pictures. Like, that's an issue, yeah? So I'm like, trying to fix it. And dinner is being served. It's family style for 180 people. So there's just multiple plates of everything just put on every table, which, if you think about it, it's mind blowing, like, in terms of how much food and how, yeah, plates that provide to say, hey, here's, it's Asian style. So here's, here's your rice, here's your veggies, here's this, here's that, all on different plates for each table. Absolutely insane. So food gets set I'm still just on a liquid diet, apparently. Bite of a carrot. I was like, I'm so no coffee,

Matt Sodnicar 38:15
carrots and gin at this point. All right, sweet.

SJ Lawyer 38:22
Gin. Doesn't start with a C, so

Matt Sodnicar 38:23
we're close. I saw where you're going. It works. It works.

SJ Lawyer 38:27
And I just like, I think when you get so full of anxiety, you have a hard time eating, yeah, yeah. It's just like, my brain is just like, Nah, girl, we got other shit going on up here. We don't got time to put something in your mouth and actually fuel you. We've got to figure out all these other problems. So that's where I was out. So I'm like, I don't want to eat. And then I realized, okay, we need to put the donuts on the donut tier that I brought so I can't eat. I have another task to and the coordinator at this point, I don't know, was like, already wasted from the second the wedding got over. So my pre gaming, much were you? I thought you had a job to do. So she was gone, like, just on the dance floor already doing whatever, not her job. So I'm like, Okay, I thought she was supposed to set up a donut tier. I'll do it. She's not there. I don't know where she's at. So amazing. I go over and my boyfriend made these donut tears. They were a little bit too big, but whatever he tried, he did a good job. And the bride had mini donuts that she wanted to have as part of the dessert. So I'm setting up these mini donuts. And then John pops over, and I was like, Oh, hey. Like, everything looked good. I had a bite of carrot, like, I'm sure it was delicious. And he's like, Oh, you didn't eat. And I was like, I don't got time for that. I'm on this liquid diet right now, unintentionally on a liquid diet. And. And so then he's just chatting with me, and we're giggling, because there's just like chemistry forming, and it's just this like ball of energy that's just like growing, growing between us. And all of a sudden I drop a donut, and my first reaction was, you can't waste a donut. Like, are you kidding me? So I pick up the donut, and I was like, but I can't serve the donut because it just fell on the ground. So I was like, I have to eat this donut. I have to sacrifice, yes, you do to myself. So I look at him, and instantly was like, without even like, really thinking, I was just like, will you share this donut with me? And he's like, Yeah, of course. So then we share this donut and come to find out, what I've learned through the years is that all of John's employees at this wedding knew that he was crushing on me, so they're all in this background cheering like, Dude, she's alone. You should go swoop in right now. Dude, she's doing this alone. Like, go talk to her here. So I had no idea, but he's being he's got his little cheering squad in the background pushing him to be like, Dude, she's over there. She's over here. And then I also found out that he, after the initial meeting at the walkthrough, Jake, was like, Oh yeah, she's cute. Like, I think I'm gonna swoop in. And John's like, bro, give me one girl. You get all the girls. Give me one girl. Like, give me this girl. Let me have a chance with this girl. Instead of you swooping in like you always do. So Jake was or I keep saying his name, beep, him. Anyway. He was just like, Fine, whatever. So John was like, Cool, cool, cool, I want to crush him, this girl. So then he told all his employees, because I don't know you know John. He talks a bit.

SJ Lawyer 41:55
Everyone knows everything,

SJ Lawyer 41:57
so employees know and tell him to swoop in. So then we share a donut, and then I'm like, Cool. Well, moving on. Have to go back sit with my boyfriend, which he didn't know, but and a boyfriend,

Matt Sodnicar 42:08
and how long had you been with your boyfriend at that point? About

SJ Lawyer 42:12
six years. Oh, but it was five years too long, and I had been trying to plan, I guess, how to break up with him. But we had a huge friend group of like, 20 plus people, and there's 14 of us that were, like, tight knit, and then the rest of them were just like, floaters in the group, and we were like, at the core of it. So it's hard to be like, hey, like you're we're convenient for each other, and that's our relationship. And if anything changes with us that disrupts our whole entire friend group and base, and that's going to be like an earthquake that's shattering, because then everyone has to choose a side, because that's what everyone

Matt Sodnicar 42:56
does, even though that's what happens. Yeah, they always do, yeah. So I just kind

SJ Lawyer 42:59
of sat in this relationship of, hey, this is not really a great relationship, but it's convenient, and I'm not lonely, because at least we have we have each other. So I guess I'll wait here until something better comes. I don't know, really terrible, really terrible.

Matt Sodnicar 43:16
You're not the first person that's done that, by the way,

SJ Lawyer 43:19
no, and that's comforting. I'm not alone in this world, knowing that it's a natural thing. Yeah, we all just want to be loved, and sometimes it's the wrong person until we find the right person. So John came and got me after the donuts were out, we shared a donut at another fire explosion, moment of this donut sharing. And he's like, we have a problem. I'm like, talking what's going on. I love solving problems. And he's like, so do I was like, however, I'm sick of solving problems today. But like, let's throw it at me. He's like, Well, the groom wanted an ice cream cake, and there's no freezer on this property, so the ice cream cake got put in the cooler. And I don't know how long it's been sitting there, but it started to cave in. So what do we do? Do we bring out the cake now? Do we wait? I don't know where the coordinator is. She kind of seems like she's falling over there. So I don't really know what to do. So I was like, alright, let's I'm gonna make a call. We're gonna pull out the ice cream cake, because there was no cake cutting ceremony. So I was like, Cool. Let's just pull out the cake and you guys will start cutting the slices, and maybe we'll get the DJ guy to make an announcement that, hey, ice creams ready? So are your donuts? Go ahead and start grabbing it before it melts. So I was like, this is this is the direction. Let's do this. Let's also do more food. I love this. Have

SJ Lawyer 45:01
it. Wow. This Wow. I

SJ Lawyer 45:06
don't think it is, but better rice. Explain this one to a Chef John

Speaker 3 45:13
Chinese, five spice grease, pork belly covered some rice. It's like cilantro rice with some veggies. We have, we have, we have

SJ Lawyer 45:22
some backyard green beans. Oh yeah

SJ Lawyer 45:25
for my parents,

Matt Sodnicar 45:27
yeah, and broccoli. God looks amazing. Also

SJ Lawyer 45:29
for my parents, sorry, I

SJ Lawyer 45:30
had to hodgepodge this one together pretty quick.

Matt Sodnicar 45:32
Looks incredible. Thank you. Hell yeah, you're spoiling me. I'm going to expect food from podcast guests from now on, if you're

SJ Lawyer 45:47
on the podcast, you better bring food.

Matt Sodnicar 45:49
That tartare was amazing, dude. Thank you.

SJ Lawyer 45:53
He was he has been telling me

Matt Sodnicar 45:57
about it. It delivered that was great. Take a

SJ Lawyer 46:02
tiny bite. Uh, yeah? So ice cream cake? Yeah, so the bride's mom. I think it's tradition where a bride's mother will give her a cutting knife, a cake, cutting knife and a serving. I think that's tradition. I don't know. I didn't have a traditional wedding, yeah. So she gave her this, like, cute, glittery, handled cake cutting knife and cake set, whatever. So I pull it out, because I had it, and I was like, here it is. I need you guys to do the cake cutting. I'll check back in with you in a minute, and they start cutting. But the first slice, because it's an ice cream cake, the handle breaks off the knife, so the knife is stuck in the cake, and the handle is in the hand. So I didn't get very far, because that happened, like, right after I said, Okay, you guys do this. I'm gonna try to eat another bite of carrot or something, and they're standing there. Like, what do we do to handle this broke? I was like, Okay, well, throw away the knife, because that's not worth keeping. And I guess try the cake serving portion, like that tool to try cutting it. So he tries that, and that handle breaks as well. So I was like, awesome. We are, we are winning with things happening really well today. So one of their employees had a really nice knife with them for catering, I guess. And so they got that knife, got the cake cut, and everything was fine. Got it, served whatever. Everyone moved on. I don't even know if the bride got cake, because everyone's drunk at this point, which also, I think at that point I I had probably a half a bottle of gin to myself. I just kept going back and going back. So, my God, this isn't like this is such an anxiety day. So at one point, John and I had had a conversation about poop emojis. Yeah, I don't know how or why that came up. Is

Matt Sodnicar 48:11
there more than one? Well,

SJ Lawyer 48:12
there's just the one, right? The one poop emoji. But I think I was talking about how funny I thought it was and how cool it was. I don't know. I was just like, oh, poop emojis are so funny. I don't know it was rude. So then he comes back and finds me again, like later, and he's like, I have to show you something. And I'm into this guy. He's like, my jam. He's so cool. I forgot even had a boyfriend. I don't know where he went. He was somewhere. I just, I don't even know what. And so I follow John back into this back kitchen area, and there's a giant poop emoji, like blown up, inflatable poop emoji sitting in this kitchen. I was like, What are the odds that I just told you I have this weird obsession with the poop emoji, which is really weird to say out loud. And then all of a sudden there's a poop emoji here. I'm like, it's like, the stars are aligning for us. So that was really fun, um, and then I go back and dance some more and drink some more gin and tonic, and I don't even know my name at that point. I should also add this part in, because I got dressed in the dark, I wasn't able to actually look at my full ensemble, and I had the most visible panty line all day in my dress. And John has, to this day, commented on how much he loved my panty line.

Matt Sodnicar 49:48
Okay, so as a as a dumb guy, is it because the color of your panties were off or because it was the wrong style for the dress? I

SJ Lawyer 49:59
don't question it was. Wrong style for the dress. Okay? For clarification, they were nude underwear, okay, on a white dress filled with tons of flowers. And

Matt Sodnicar 50:11
I actually know that fact, it's like, if you're gonna wear a white dress, you don't wear white panties. You wear

SJ Lawyer 50:17
nude Yeah, yeah. So that was fun,

Matt Sodnicar 50:21
which I have not worn. But I've been told, in removing said garments but not putting them on,

SJ Lawyer 50:29
you've never had a bad experience yourself, because white underwear, my white linen pants are showing Yeah, so that that pan, apparently, was very, very prominent. So whatever, I don't care. I don't know about it. I'm just, you know, a bottle of gin and tonic

Matt Sodnicar 50:50
that's back there. You can't even see it,

SJ Lawyer 50:52
the medankadong. And I'm having a good time. And John also owns corn doggies. This is an ad for corn doggies food truck, um, which was the late night snack so, oh, cool. I didn't know that. Yes, they both lick skillet, catering for Hey, feed us our happy hour and our dinner. And then look corn doggies for our 10pm 11pm whatever time I even know That's brilliant. Yeah, and then have corn doggies for your snack. It's not fun on the corn doggies end, because you have to stay up late and serve food to a bunch of drunks. But it's fun for the wedding guests. They're like, Oh my gosh, I need substance, and I want a corn dog. So I went and got a corn dog at one point, and I got a lobster dog. And I'll be pretty honest, it was not good. I was like, What is this? This is not great. And I told Joan. I was like, This is not a great corn dog. And he's like, Hey, we're just trying it out. I don't know if it's gonna work. And I was like, go back to what you do and do the other ones. This is not great. That was a very forward person talking to someone I thought I knew for years. Um, that's

Matt Sodnicar 52:12
interesting, that you're crushing on this dude, and now you've torpedoed his business.

SJ Lawyer 52:20
The power of gin and tonic. It

Matt Sodnicar 52:23
does wonders for you. Truth serum, good on you, though, right?

SJ Lawyer 52:28
Also, gin and tonic made me very brave where certain songs were coming on and a guy was sitting, a friend was sitting in a chair, so I immediately was like, I got this liquid courage of gold right now where, apparently I have a boyfriend somewhere, but this guy's really cute, and I'm crushing on him, and I feel like I'm invincible, because I did all this decorations and I conquered the day, I put out fires, I did all this stuff. So clearly, I can do anything I want. I'm an idiot, but I went over to my friend I give him a lap dance because I thought I could. So John is actually walking up to me at this point, carrying a beer, trying to be like, Hey, do you can I get you a beer? And he came over to me. He was like, Can I give you this beer? And I was like, Nah, dude, I'm I'm only drinking gin. I can't take your beer. So I also didn't want to accept it, because I was like, Oh, my boyfriend's over there.

Matt Sodnicar 53:30
And he's like, Well, this is during the lap dance, yeah, right

SJ Lawyer 53:33
before the Okay, okay. And John's like, well, they said that someone drank all the gin, and the gin is gone. I was like, what someone drank all the gin? He's like, pretty sure it was you. And I was like, No, I would never drink all the gin. Like, that's, that's probably me. Okay, that makes sense. Um, so I turned on his beer and started giving this guy a lap dance. So then John immediately pulls a chair up, I love this, and gets in line, all right, if you're giving him a lap dance, give me a lap dance. And all of a sudden it was like, this line of three guys in chairs, and I gave my friend a brief one, because I'm like, You're my friend, and your girlfriend's or your wife actually is right there, and she's chill, like, there's nothing like weird there. And then the other guy was another one of John's employees, and he was he had a wedding ring on. So I was like, Oh, this is safe. I feel safe doing that. And then John was there, and I was like, Oh, hell no, I cannot give him a lap dance, because I'll enjoy that. He'll enjoy that. And my boyfriend's right there. So I was like, it'll look too real. So I immediately got up after the second lap dance and just start walking away. And John was like, come on.

Matt Sodnicar 54:49
I can totally see him saying that

SJ Lawyer 54:52
I'm laugh. Danced out. I don't have to tell you. I just forgot to do it. What are their dreams and do? Has happened, not even known. Anyway. It gets to the end of the night, um, everyone is so drunk. Don't care about anything, they just leave, like everyone does at weddings, because I brought all the decorations. Oh, tear down. Yeah, all the decorations. So here's this sloppy gin and tonic girl with a visible panty line, walking around zigzags, trying to get all my stuff, tear it down, get it in my vehicle, try to figure it all out. And John is also trying to clean up. While he shouldn't have had to clean up, it was not his responsibility, but everyone left, so he had to do it. So he looked very tired, and for some reason, I have a memory. At that moment, I was talking to him like, oh, man, this sucks, like he have always cleaning up to do. And then he brought up the fact that he had two daughters. I was like, Oh, you have children, I'm a I'm a hot mess. I don't think I can. I didn't say this to Him. I was just thinking like, oh, I can't do children because I'm clearly a hot mess. Like, I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm on gin and tonic, no way.

Matt Sodnicar 56:18
But your future, your future casting. You're thinking about exactly like, yeah, you you're thinking about this working out. You want it to work out exactly.

SJ Lawyer 56:25
Which is interesting that we do when we have instant chemistry with someone, we immediately visualize the future instead of like. I don't even know if this is why would why did I go to the future instead of the here and now and get to know you instead of like during the future, it's crazy, especially when you're on a bottle gin and tonic. Like it does not

Matt Sodnicar 56:45
a bottle, all the G, all the bottles,

SJ Lawyer 56:49
every bottle in the house, it was all in my system.

Matt Sodnicar 56:52
But I think you have to live that way, and I'll get back to that story. But like, I have to believe that you I need to think that way, because at times in my life when I've been in dark places, I don't like feeling that way. And in thinking about the possibilities and being excited and being optimistic, you can choose either one, and one of them makes me feel a lot better. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 57:18
it's true. I think that's what it was. I was like, Hey, I'm unhappy my current situation. Yeah, he seems like a fun bet. Oh, but you got kids. Oh, man, I don't know if I can do that. Um, let's see later on down the road, he told me. Um, so my roommate, I had two roommates at the time. They were both there at the wedding. One of them was, like, the best man, and he was really annoying, which kind of forgot about him. But he also was clipping all of the the flies off of my table centers and stealing them because he was also a fly fisherman, and he's like, Oh, I'm gonna take this fly. So he's going around all these tables, someone told me. So I went over, and I was like, his name, beep. What are you doing? This is my centerpiece. I created this. And I like, like, let one loose on him. I'm like, buddy, buddy with his dad. So his dad was like, Yeah, you listen to SJ, what are you doing? You sit your ass down. Like, how dare you do that? Right? Your dad's on my side, and I know your mom is too. She was sitting here. So I was getting so mad because he was clipping them all. And I was like, I told the groom I would deliver all of these flies back to him, and now you were ruining what I said I would do. Oh, so I was getting so angry. Anyway, my other roommate, who was a girl, I went to college with her, so I've known her for years. She actually knew John. So the story starts to get weird. So she knew who John was. She knew who John's ex girlfriend at this point was, and her best friend worked on corn doggies. So there was a lot of, like, connecting things going on here. And so that was fun. And so John was talking to my roommate, and was just like catching up at me, like, Hey, what's going on? Blah, blah, blah. And she was just having a good time. And then the coordinator, the drunk coordinator, who was, you know, doing somersaults everywhere because she couldn't do a job. She her, she brought her boyfriend who had braces. That's important, because it's

Matt Sodnicar 59:36
helpful. And he's not in high school, I'm guessing, okay, he's

SJ Lawyer 59:39
not in high school. I

Matt Sodnicar 59:40
mean, nothing. No shame against on fixing your teeth. No, I

SJ Lawyer 59:43
love that for people. One of my really good friends right now is going through that phase, and I love that for him, it just like paints a picture of what happened. Big beefy guy from California with these, like, mouthful braces. And he comes up to John, and he's like. Stop flirting with guests, do your job. John was like, what

Matt Sodnicar 1:00:06
the bee? Oh, you can cuss the

SJ Lawyer 1:00:10
fuck are you saying like you don't know me. You don't know that I know this person. I don't even know who you are. You're just telling me how to do my job like I am not a slave. I have been doing my job. I am taking a break to say hi to someone I know. So they almost got in a fight, and John's employees had to pull him aside so he didn't get in a fight, because he was just like, on edge. So these are all fun things I found out behind the scenes. But fast forward to the end of the night, and everyone's leaving. I found out John has kids. I'm like, who am I? What's happening? Where are we going in life? Like, I don't know what to do with myself. And he, like, comes up to the window and he's like, are you okay to drive? I was like, No, do I have a choice though? Like, I don't even know where I'm supposed to go. Hey, Marvin, let's come over here. He's fine. He won't leave mom's side. So I was like, I'm probably not good to drive, but all I have to do is like, cross this road and then I'm staying over there, but I just have to get there. So he was like, Okay, well, as long as you think you're okay to do that. And I was like, Yeah, I'm sure I'm fine. Immediately after I start crying. I'm like, I'm so drunk, I don't know where I'm going. Where anybody is that guy was super hot. I don't know what's going on in my life. And I was just like, this bundle of of a mess, all the stress from

Matt Sodnicar 1:01:35
in the morning, it's coming. All

SJ Lawyer 1:01:36
the stress came out. And I'm pretty sure at that point we exchanged numbers, just because he's like, hey, just want to make sure you know. He was doing the whole like, I just want to make sure you get home. Okay. I was like, I don't need your number. Like, I don't want it, yeah, but do I need it? No, I got a boyfriend, and I thought I told a man a boyfriend, but according to him, I didn't at that point. So I don't know who's who's telling the truth here. I don't know. So I get across the road safely. I make it there, and then I cry because I'm like, I don't know where I'm going. I'm lost, and we're staying in like these tiny homes, and I don't know my boyfriend is he's gone. He hasn't talked to me all night. So I'm like, I don't know. I guess I'm just saving this one. This one looks good. I don't know. This looks like a great place to land. So that happened, wedding happened. I made it, and excuse me, vert, and then the next day happens, and everyone's hung over. I told the bride a little bit of what happened. I was like, these are the fires that happened, that I put out so you didn't have to worry about your wedding. I just feel like it's important for you to know my friendship and what I did for you. What did anyone else do? I was like everyone else was wasted, but I was wasted and at a job. Yeah, I'm really awesome. I don't know. I was trying to build myself up. So I leave. I had to go on a work trip the next week do that, and then the bride was going on her honeymoon, which most people I feel like these days don't go on their honeymoon right after the wedding, right? But this couple, they waited like a day, and then they went on their honeymoon. And my work trip was like two days, so I was like, okay, cool. And then she texts me, and she's like, Hey, so the caterer, he took all the dishes for us and was going to wash them. And I was like, wow, that's that's a lot for the caterer to do, to take all your dishes and wash them. That's a That's a lot. And she's like, Yeah, he volunteered. And I was like, wow, this is a stand up guy. And she's like, Yeah. So also, like, we ended up with this knife because we couldn't cut the ice cream cake. It was like, Oh yeah, yeah, that happened. So you have that knife. And she's like, Yeah. So what I'm saying is, I need you to get in contact with him to get those dishes back for me, like, for me, and then give him the knife that we found with our stuff that was like, not a problem. I got you.

Matt Sodnicar 1:04:05
I will happily do this task.

SJ Lawyer 1:04:06
I will very much this, this task. So text John was like, hey, thanks again for such a fun event. All your help. Like, you know, trying to be like, how do I have a conversation when I don't know you, but I think you're really hot. And so I was like, Hey, I have all this stuff, or I have this knife or whatever I need to get to you, and you have stuff that you need to get to the bride, but that can be me. So let's get together, and I'll just buy you a beer, because you just did so much for me, and we just solve all these problems together. So let me help you. If I buy you beer, why am I helping him? But I'm just like, let me give you beer. Yeah, I want to see you. I'm like, I don't know if I could scream it as loud as I wanted to then, but I was like, Oh my gosh, I need to see you. Like, just get a beer with me. So he was like, Absolutely, like, not even blinking an eye. So I'm like, Cool, you're gonna

Matt Sodnicar 1:04:58
give him the beer. That you rejected from him, I see how you were,

SJ Lawyer 1:05:04
like, cool. So we met at Nick's Italian because it was like right down there at my house. And what turned into, let me buy you one beer turned into four hours and multiple beers and food and everything, and telling our life stories to each other, that's awesome. And it just turned into this, like, oh my gosh, this is my person. I barely know you, but you're my person, and I know that you're my person with barely knowing you. I'm like, that's insane. And up until this point, I don't think I believed in love at first sight, or any of that, like, oh, I met this guy and instantly knew who was my love my life. I was just like, That's bogus. Like, that doesn't happen for anybody. Like, you have to work, sometimes you have to be friends first. Like, it just happens over time. But like, meeting John, it was, Nope, you're this guy, and I just know it. There's just, like, no second guessing or anything. It was just like instant, you're you're this guy. So hey, Marvin, why don't you get out of there? Thank you. So we had a such a fun time. And then he was living with a roommate at the time, and he went home after that and said, If she asked me to marry her, right now, I would say yes. So we instantly, like we both, had the same feelings of each other after we left that one beer moment. So

Matt Sodnicar 1:06:30
it wasn't just that you were unhappy with the other guy, and it wasn't that it was new. It was something completely different, right? I just that's cool. Yeah.

SJ Lawyer 1:06:42
So then I had a bigger hand, like, problem hands, because then John was like, Hey, this is fun. Can I like, see you again? And I thought I told him I had a boyfriend, and he was just being super cool. And I was like, No, I have a boyfriend, after all of this has happened. And he was like, what? I was like, I thought you knew? Yeah, he was at the wedding. He was there. I was sitting next to him. I was dancing with him the floor, like dancer at one point. I was like, how did you not know? Because we're dudes, and I was like, and I told you, he was like, You never told me. I never saw you with a dude. I was like, well, you're blind, I don't know. So first, first little fight, you know, boyfriend, uh, so anyway, fast forwarding turned into Hey, he had to go to go to work trip for two weeks, and I told him, Hey, I really like you, and this is going to go somewhere for the long haul. I just need to figure out my current situation. I was like, Give me time to figure it out. You're going away for two weeks. So give me time to figure it out. In that time, he never stopped texting me, like every day he texts me. And I was like, this is not the definition of letting me think, Who is this guy and why are you so persistent? But same time, I was like, Oh my gosh, I love this. This is that new, fresh, exciting relationship, whatever you're just like texting, yeah. So in that two weeks, I made the decision, all right, I have to break up with my boyfriend. Have you all this kind of stuff,

Matt Sodnicar 1:08:26
and you guys are living together, right? Yeah, so

SJ Lawyer 1:08:29
the boyfriend was living in the house, okay, he was also one of my roommates at the time. No, did he move? I can't actually remember. He was my roommate at one point. All right, which I think is why we started dating, and he moved out and got his own house. But I can't remember at this point he had gotten his own house, or if he was, I think he did. Yeah, he moved out and was living in his own place, because I had two other roommates at that point. Then, yeah, guy and a girl, but that wasn't the guy that was, okay, confusing. Um, so right before John went on his trip, though, he stopped by because he's like, Hey, I I made you something, and I just wanted to drop it off before I leave town. He made me poop emoji brownies. I was like, Oh my gosh, it's amazing. I don't know. I don't understand this poop emoji obsession, or where it came from, or any of this, but thank you. And so then he stayed a little bit longer, and then the guy roommate saw me talking to him, and then started this rumor that I was cheating on. Kevin, oops. So the name, it's hard to not say names, cheating on what's his butt, and everyone started to just, like, form his opinion about me. I was like, Dude, he just gave me people, Mooji brownies, like nothing happened. I never touched him, like nothing's going on.

Matt Sodnicar 1:09:56
Yeah. Still somewhat professional at this point. I

SJ Lawyer 1:09:59
was like, mentally. Yeah, yeah, I was, because I was, I was done with the other guy, and I was already moving on to someone else. Like, mentally, yeah, I was like, but emotionally, there was nothing there with the other guy either, yeah. So I was like, in a way, yes, I was totally cheating. But same time I was like, this relationship done brilliant, has been dead for at least five years. So I was like, I don't know what's worse. And no one knew that either. So our friend group didn't see they don't see the, yeah, the internal the relationship. They just see what they want to see, or they see what we want them to see. So they're not going to understand, like, Oh, you guys have a really bad relationship, but you're just, like, comfortable. Like, that sucks, you know? Like, they're not going to see

Matt Sodnicar 1:10:40
that. It's the Instagram fallacy, right? Yeah, they're seeing your reels and not your Exactly. It's exactly, not your rehearsals, perfect way of putting

SJ Lawyer 1:10:47
it. So then it was, you know, John leaves, and I figure out how to break up with the boyfriend I do. And it was great. Everything worked out. And I was like, Okay, we're moving forward. And then John comes back, and it was just like, we just clicked and connected. And that was the first time, well, I guess third time I've seen him since, since the wedding. Everything else was via text message. He didn't know each other, and it was just like we were inseparable. And we've just never had a day that we haven't talked to each other since, which is kind of crazy thing about too he's made it a point to be like, I'm not gonna let one day go without actually saying something to you, even if it's like a hi, I love you or whatever it is. He always makes sure there's like something. So that's really cool. So future, I'm not friends with any of those people anymore because that rumor started, and because I broke up with the guy, and then everyone chose sides, and I guess I was outcasted and canceled, because I chose love, and I chose what I needed cheers to that I know. So I was like, All right, you guys want to cancel me. That's fine. I don't need you, do, which it's hard. That's also a different topic. Of being in your 30s and having a group of friends that's really tight knit, or what you thought was tight knit, and then you realize they drop you so fast. And I was like, wow, I wasn't really your friend. If you just dropped me because you listened to something that someone told you that they didn't actually know, yeah. I was like, That sucks. So I spiraled for a couple years

Matt Sodnicar 1:12:27
of I can see that because you it was like 20 people you said in the spring

SJ Lawyer 1:12:31
room, yeah, upwards, yeah, yeah. Well,

Matt Sodnicar 1:12:35
I'll tell you a secret why I wanted to hear this story. Yeah. So after we recorded John's episode, we went to the town pump, and you were giving me the highlights of this, and I had this joke that popped in my head. This is not so what I was going to do is try to stay with a straight face like I'm feeling the same way about you that you felt about John. No kidding, it was this is I've only seen this happen a couple times like in real life. There was a time when you were kind of CO telling this story, and you probably don't even remember this, but you were looking at him, and it was kind of that Instagram meme where it's like, get somebody who looks at you like this, and the way you were looking at him, I was like, I was I was rapture is not the right word, but I was captivated by the way you're looking at him, baby, yeah, and it was really cool to witness.

SJ Lawyer 1:13:47
So he needed to be here.

Matt Sodnicar 1:13:50
No, no. It

SJ Lawyer 1:13:51
is fun to hear his banter back and forth and like, No, this is what I expected, but what happened versus what I thought? He had

Matt Sodnicar 1:13:59
his time. He did have his time. He doesn't. He'd be talking all time, yeah, but I thought it was important to note that the wedding story was was fun and fascinating, but where it ended up, and then, just as I've gotten to know you both, but it was that look that you gave him, that I was like, I wanted to explore this a lot. I love that.

SJ Lawyer 1:14:22
I do love them, but it is funny, too, and it shows, yeah, I think it is crazy to think about how you meet, that you can meet a caterer at a wedding, that someone else is getting married, and their focus is their love, and then you find your true love at a wedding, which is, it's like one of those meet cutes that you just you see in the movies, like, what is it the wedding like, the wedding planner, which, by the way, that came out when I was the seventh grade. And what's his name, Matthew McConaughey. He's the main guy in there. And JLo, she's the, she's the wedding planner.

SJ Lawyer 1:14:58
Oh, yeah.

SJ Lawyer 1:14:59
So I've always loved that, because I've always had this, like, back of my mind. I love weddings, I love this idea, I love this whole thing. I want to do this kind of stuff, and I always loved it. And in seventh grade, we had this stupid thing as as girls, we're like, oh, well, these girls, they have actual boyfriends, but we can have boyfriends too. They just don't have to know that they're not real. Let's make up our own boyfriends. And I remember going to the theater and seeing the wedding planner and being like, dude, Matthew McConaughey. He is so hot. He's my crush, and his name was Steve in the movie. And I was like, my boyfriend's name is Steve. And I remember going around school, trying to tell everyone, like, yeah, I have a boyfriend. His name's Steve, guys. He just goes a different school,

Matt Sodnicar 1:15:45
Niagara Falls.

SJ Lawyer 1:15:47
It was so funny. But I just remember, like, you know that movie is just like that, where you know the he's supposed to be getting married, she's the wedding planner they meet. In this instance, it's like that movie thing, which just seems like it's one of those things like, this is never reality. You're not

Matt Sodnicar 1:16:04
gonna meet someone this way. They're cliches, because they're true

SJ Lawyer 1:16:07
Exactly, yeah. I mean, it happens, and then here we are, now married.

Matt Sodnicar 1:16:11
How long you been married?

SJ Lawyer 1:16:14
Uh, four years. All right, this October, all right, which, this is the cutest part of this whole entire story, I think, well, we got married in 2020, which is covid. So We eloped because covid, yeah, and I was dead set on an October wedding, because that's like, my favorite month. Weather's beautiful. Trees are beautiful, Everything's beautiful. And I was like, I just, let's just do it actually. I should probably tell you the engagement story, because it's even worse. I mean, even better, and maybe ghetto. We got an inflatable John got an inflatable hot tub. And I was extremely pissed off because he got a huge tax return, and we were living together this point, and he got his really big tax turn. And I was like, dropping the hints, like, Hey, maybe I don't know, buy a ring with a tax turn. Like, I think that we should, like, move this life of ours together towards marriage, yeah. And he, he was just like, Man, I ready for that. I was like, Oh my gosh. Like, you are just awful sometimes, like, just like, propose already. Like, let's just move this show out. And so then he's surprising me. He's like, I bought an inflated laptop. I was like, Are you kidding me? I literally do not agree with this purchase, but whatever, blow it up. Let's get this baby going. So it's like, snowing, and it's March, and it's 2020, and he's filling it up. And his youngest daughter was living with us at a time we're getting it going. And then he was like, Oh, this is the best. And I was like, All right, whatever. This is cool. Like, I approve of this purchase, but I'm gonna make you think that I'm pissed off because I wanted to ring, so I hop in the hot tub, and I was like, Hey, take my picture. Like, I'm not that person where I'm like, take my picture. But I was like, This is so cool. We have a hot tub. I was like, take my picture of me in my denim, looking jumper, swimsuit. It's swimsuit material, but it looks like I'm wearing overalls. And I'm like, take a picture of me in this with my beer. I was like, I'm so cool. So my take a picture. So he does. And then he gets in, and I was like, you're kind of acting weird, but whatever. And all of a sudden he brings up this. It's a fortune cookie lock, like an actual sized fortune cookie, okay? And he pulls it up. And I was like, What the hell is this? Is this a like, a paper? What do you call those things like you put on your desk to hold your

Matt Sodnicar 1:18:51
paper? Oh, paperweight, paperweight.

SJ Lawyer 1:18:54
Why did you give me a fortune cookie? That's kind of weird. But like, Okay, that's cool. And so then he just kind of looks at me, like, no, like, shake it. So I like, shook. And I was like, oh, there's something inside. And I was like, Ooh, this is fun, like, mystery. And I open it, there's a ring. So I was like, you motherfucker, inflatable hot tub to propose to me, which was not his initial plan. It just the moment felt right, and that's what he did. So got proposed to engage in March, the day the world shut down, 2020 and I was like, I see what's going on here. The world's shutting down, and you want me to commit to you, because the world's shutting down and you're afraid that if I leave, you'll never meet anyone. I get it. So I was like, of course. I said yes. And then I was like, well, let's just, like, plan our wedding, because I do this stuff for living, so let's just do it. So six months later, in October, we got married, but it was an elopement hybrid, because I didn't want to have everyone, all my family and all his family, come. The wedding. I was like, let's just do our parents, keep it small, and then we'll have a big party later, once it's not covid And people can come out and breathe within other people's distances. So I was like, let's just do that. So that worked. And then the fires happened, which is ironic, because there's fires now, yeah, but the fire was up canyon, Canyon. What is it called? Cameron. Cameron Cass, yeah. Okay, yeah. So they were also going into Rocky Mountain, and we were just gonna go up to Rocky Mountain and get married up there, which I had a spot reserved everything while the girls were closed. S park was closed. Rocky Mountains. Where

Matt Sodnicar 1:20:39
have I heard this story before,

SJ Lawyer 1:20:42
so everything's closed like it is right now, and we found out 24 hours before we're supposed to get married. And we didn't find out from anyone but my dad, who looked it up, and was like, just let you know your place you're supposed to get married at. It might be burning, and we can't go there. So I was like, Cool, great. What am I supposed to do? So in 24 hours, we had to completely re plan the whole entire wedding, which we did, and pivot entirely to get married. And then it ended up being the most beautiful thing ever. Where

Matt Sodnicar 1:21:19
did you re pivot to, we

SJ Lawyer 1:21:20
pivot to, yeah, re pivot. We went up to Gateway natural area, which is up, oh, Canyon, because you could still go up there. So John and I went up there to look at it. Someone suggested, hey, actually, the bride that we met at her wedding, we met at she was like, Hey, why don't you go up to Siemens reservoir? I was like, I've never been up there. So we went up there, and the reservoir was ugly, like, there's this huge cement wall. There's just this. I was like, this is not this is not me. This is not us. This is not gonna work. And I was set on an outdoor wedding because I just, I love Colorado, love nature. I just, yeah, being on set, I'm like, that's where I need to get married. And so as we're walking back, it was the most beautiful scenery of here's the mountain, here's the water, here's the river, here's all these beautiful colors popping. There was all these huge bushes down by the water that were just yellow and gorgeous. And I stopped in the bridge, and I was like, that's it. We're getting married on the water, like, right there next to the water. Like, that's what we're doing it. So we did, pivoted, and then canceled our food reservations up in Estes Park and just got a taco truck, which is the taco stop. We just had them give us whole bunch of food catered that at our own house. We have all the catering stuff. Yeah, catering business. So my family picked that up, checked my parents house, set up tables. Set the table with decorations. I told him to use, but I just randomly had and we made it work. It was great, but the best part was at our ceremony at the very end, my brother in law, now ex brother in law, that's kind of awkward, but is what it is. But he I gave him a fanny pack that said party on it, because we like to party. And I was like, this is your one task, as my brother in law is at the very end of my vows, I need you to whip around the fanny pack to show it, and then I need you to unzip it and then pull out a donut. So we did. He took my instructions. Did it? The awkward part was that morning I was calling him in my closet with my credit card. Oh, I was like, Hey, brother in law, I need her to stop at this place and get this donut. Yeah, here's my credit card information, use this. And John walks in on me, talking on the phone on our wedding day, hiding. And he was like, What is going on? I'm like, nothing. Don't worry about it. Just leave me alone. I'm just wedding day stuff. So that was really weird. And then at the wedding, then he whips around the the fanny pack, opens it up, and I finished my vows. And then I was like, John, not only will you share this life with me? And then I pause, and I take the donut, and I was like, but will you share this donut with me? Because we shared the donut on the floor. Yeah. So he's, of course, crying. And he was like, come on.

SJ Lawyer 1:24:21
So his vows were, I concur? Kidding. He actually said things, but he did say, I concur.

Matt Sodnicar 1:24:31
I think the donut beats the hot tub. I know in terms of surprises, it's pretty great. That's really cool.

SJ Lawyer 1:24:38
Now, our love grows through corn dogs queen?

Matt Sodnicar 1:24:46
Well, cheers to that.

SJ Lawyer 1:24:47
No more lobster dogs, though, that's for sure. Now that you're in charge. No, I'm in charge. They do not get to make it back on the on the video.

Matt Sodnicar 1:24:55
Well, SJ, that was everything I hoped for.

SJ Lawyer 1:24:58
It's a lot. Thank you. A lot of drama, a lot of drama, and lodge in and all this food that John doesn't get to enjoy, yeah, because he made it,

Matt Sodnicar 1:25:11
yeah? Well, thank you. This has been phenomenal. Yeah, thanks for having me. It's been fun. So tell me about this wedding, which one we'll get to yours. Yeah, we'll get to yours later.

SJ Lawyer 1:25:27
The wedding, I met the one at the one, the one, the one. So I guess I have to back up before the wedding, because it was pre wedding. I was, well, yeah, I've got a group of friends. I had a group of friends. I should say we're all pretty tight knit, pretty close, really cool group of friends. And this couple is getting married. I'm gonna leave names out just for you know,

Matt Sodnicar 1:25:56
sure, legal reasons. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 1:26:00
they they've been together since, like, high school, so they've been high school, high school sweethearts, and they finally got married, or decided to get married. I was dead set on like, I knew I was going to be a bridesmaid. I was like, Oh yeah, I'm going to make the bridesmaid crew. Like, this is awesome. I haven't been a bridesmaid and so on, since my sister's wedding is awesome, and then I didn't get asked. I was like, what you you got this girl as your bridesmaid over me. I thought we were closer, you know, the whole like, caddy, caddy friend stuff. But as I am, I was just like, hey, that's cool. No worries. And she she knew I had this love for event planning, and I love decorating, and I love doing all these weddings. So she's like, will you be my event person? So I was like, Yeah, I don't know that means, but I'll do it. Like, I want to be a part of this, because I still think you're a friend, and this is awesome. And I love being involved, because I'm the baby of the family. That's just who I am. Like, I need to be involved in something. So she brought me on as her like, decorator for the wedding. So we spent months a paid gig. No, okay, completely free. All right, just time, because that's, that's who you are, that's who I am. So we spent months planning it out, from table decoration to actually making the table decoration to how's the arch going to look? How's this section of the wedding going to look? How's this going to be like? Every aspect you can think of for a wedding. I was

Matt Sodnicar 1:27:33
in charge describing that gives me stress, because I'm the detail person. I'm the big picture person, right? Keep going and

SJ Lawyer 1:27:40
details, that's the thing. Is details, that's where it's at for me is, I'm like, You give me a detail. I'm like, I love it. I thrive on details. Okay, it's a whole, whole other thing. But so I was like, let's do this. This is great. So I planned it all out, and it comes to few days before the wedding, and I was like, Well, I'm driving a Saturn four door, I don't know. SS one series. Don't even make Saturn's anymore. No. I was like, I can't fit any of this in my car. So how am I gonna get all this decoration stuff to your wedding? And she's like, Oh, well, just, just fire my forerunner. Actually, I should back up because there is a pre history. Yeah. Okay, good. So a month before, everything's everything's figured out. I just had a few more, few more decoration stuff I finish up. But a month before, I was like, Hey, can we do a walkthrough? Because I don't like designing things and doing details when I don't know the space and I didn't know what I'm working with, sure. So I was like, Hey, let's do a walkthrough. And this the wedding took place at Planet bluegrass, which is up in lions. So it's like $20,000 to rent that place. So it's, like, super expensive. So she's like, Yeah, let's do, let's do a walk through, and we'll bring the caterers. So I was like, Cool, cool, cool, like, whatever. So we go up there, and it's like, nine in the morning, because I still go to work the next or that day. So it's up, you know, planting food grass. So I'm a little chilly, so I had my, my red jacket zipped all the way up. I had my sunny zone, because it's bright outside, and we do this walkthrough, and the caters are there, and I recognize them because they also have the corn dog food truck. I was like, oh, yeah, I know these guys. I don't know them, but I like, know them because I see them, yeah, type of No. It's like, I don't know their names or anything, but I feel like I know them without knowing them so and I was like, and the the blonde haired one, he's really cute, but I knew that there was like history there with another girl. So I was like, He's, he's taken, he's kind of drama, like, whatever. Well, that's

Matt Sodnicar 1:29:57
incident. Yeah. I

SJ Lawyer 1:29:58
was like, I don't know if I want to touch that. So we do his walkthrough. It was really fun. And the other guy, his name's Jake. Actually, I said I wasn't gonna say, names doesn't matter. His name doesn't matter. Beat, yeah, his name's what. He

SJ Lawyer 1:30:15
was super, like, flirty and just like, what's going on, like, just trying to, like, hey the whole time. And I thought it was super childish. I was like, What is this? Is this your form of flirting? Because I am way too cool for this. I had no idea what's going on, but he had very soft brown eyes and, like, long eyelashes. So when he looks at you, he just has this like, Hey, I Hey, my name's beep, you know, like, I'm really, I'm really cool. You should probably, like, Come home with me. And I just remember looking, I'm thinking, like, you are utter childness. Like, move away. So, like, it's

Matt Sodnicar 1:30:56
a brief tangent. So I'm trying to understand, leaving all women's minds, but to your mind, right? So you think this guy's childish, but the eyes and the eyelashes, so where does that tip scales for him like,

SJ Lawyer 1:31:13
so he's childish, but he backs his eyes. And then for most women, it probably the childness goes away and they're like, swooned by the eyes. Oh, all right, because he has soft, welcoming eyes, is what I like to describe. But that's it. Like, I don't find him attractive or interesting. I found him just annoying. I was like, Oh, you guys soft eyes, great. Like, high five,

Matt Sodnicar 1:31:36
okay. Like, all right, keep going. Like, I wanted to know how All right,

SJ Lawyer 1:31:39
yeah. So apparently, according to John, I can say his name because future, present, current husband, he

Matt Sodnicar 1:31:47
signed a waiver. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 1:31:49
I wear my sunglasses the whole entire walkthrough. I thought I took them off, but his point of view is that I never took him off. So I'm this mysterious girl with these sunglasses on that looks really cute to him, and I have this red jacket on, which is

Matt Sodnicar 1:32:05
maybe you've got brown eyes, and long last, right?

SJ Lawyer 1:32:07
He had no idea. And he's just like, Who is this? Some serious chick. She seems super rad. Like, I'm into her also. So that's his point of view. But then we did this walkthrough, and then I get in the car to go back, and I was talking to the bride, and I was like, Dude, that that beep guy. We learned the names. I was like, Dude, he is he is stupid. I was like, he's really, like, just annoying. I was like, the other one, though he's pretty cute. So that was that moving on, when I went to the bachelorette party, went long, living life. Nothing to really come of John and his employee, no other thoughts. So then it comes to, back to where I was, where I had a Saturn vehicle. So then all of a sudden, the ride she's like, Here, take my forerunner. Drive my forerunner. Just we can stack as much stuff as possible in the forerunner. And I was loving this, because I've always wanted a forerunner. I was like, Oh my gosh, this is the best we can ever I'm driving a forerunner, and I have this thing packed full with all the things I made and design like this is a really good feeling. So the morning of I woke up feeling super, super rested, super excited, just like, pumped. Like, let's do this wedding. I'm so excited to do this wedding and blow everyone away. I don't need to be bridesmaid. I decorated this whole place. Like, this wedding is half mine. You know, that was like, my mindset. It was like, This is great. Let's go. What were the decorations? So I had a photo booth. I always start with that, because it's the easiest, really cool, shimmery background photo booth with popsicle sticks with their faces on it. So, like, they had, I think I had four different facial expressions for both the bride and the groom, and I cut their heads out, like, blew them up, cut them out, put them on popsicle sticks so people could, like, pose with them. Oh, in the photo booth. Yeah, in the photo booth, plus other fun, fun types of things. Didn't have photo booth. I did the whole table runners and the table numbers so every they had. So this wedding was 180 people, wow, by the way, which is quite a lot of people. So big for a wedding, I feel like that's really big for a wedding. Um, that's, that's a lot of people to feed, a lot of people to manage with, people to, yeah, control with alcohol. It's, it's, it's a mess. 180 people's a mess. Um, so I did these really cool. So the the groom is a fly fisherman, and I thought it would be really cool to combine fly fishing with what the bride loves, which is she loves everything. It's really hard to pinpoint one thing she loves, but we did eucalyptus along all the tables. Oh, so set up family style. So there. They're the rect rectangle tables that are just, I don't know. They had a couple of them in a row, like four of them in a row, and then everyone just sat there. And so we put eucalyptus on all the tables. And then we had a brown bottle, which I don't know if it was a beer bottle. I can't remember anymore where I got them, but they're just the brown bottles. And then I used, I also can't quite remember if I use a stick or what I used. I think I used some sort of material, but I mimicked a fishing rod. So I had a like fishing rod coming out of this bottle, and at the end of the rod was hanging one of the tie, like a fly, a flight, a fly, a tied fly, a fly, let's call it that. It's much easier to fly. My dad's actually a fly fisherman, so he's pretty into this. So I should know this better, but he's huge into it. The groom is into fly fishing, so he has all these flies, and I put them on the end of this mimicked fishing rod, okay? And then I made each number for which tables which? Because guests had to be like, Hey, I'm sitting at table nine. Okay, which is table nine? So it's, here's this fishing rod with a nine on the end and then a an actual fly. How cool. Yeah, it looked really rad.

Matt Sodnicar 1:36:19
I was the eucalyptus, the water was no that

SJ Lawyer 1:36:23
was just laid out across the whole entire table. And then she also, the bride, was really big on having her own China wear. So I'm like, All right, you got, you got 180 people, and you want to have your own China wear? That's, that's a lot. We're gonna get that. So her her mom, her soon to be mother in law, cousins, aunts, like everyone, went to every goodwill, antique store and got plates. Okay,

Matt Sodnicar 1:36:52
so she didn't have 180 servings, right? She

SJ Lawyer 1:36:56
just had, like, she wanted her own plates, okay, for everything, but she wanted them to be mixed matched, yeah. So I was like, All right, do you like? That's a lot. So I had that. So I had the silverware, the dishware, the napkins, the tabletop stuff, all the stuff for the photo booth, all the stuff for the arch to get married under for the happy hour area. I had all the decorations to fill that up, which are just fun pictures of bride and the groom. I can't remember what else I did. Tons, tons of just like things to just fill, fill the room and the space to look and feel like, Hey, this is the bride and groom's wedding.

Matt Sodnicar 1:37:39
Like, this is cool. It's so personal and intimate, yeah, exactly, yeah. And

SJ Lawyer 1:37:43
I had these huge, giant tears that were supposed to be for the dessert. So this vehicle is packed. I'm

Matt Sodnicar 1:37:53
trying to play mental Tetris with what you Yeah, like, even 180 plates, yeah? Like,

SJ Lawyer 1:37:59
I took a picture of it once, like, right before I left that morning, I was like, here we go. Look at this back trunk. This is packed. You can't get anything else in here. It is so packed. So I had a friend in town who's also going to the wedding, and she had volunteered to be my help for the day. Like, hey, I'll help you set up decorations and do that stuff. And her husband was going to meet her up there. I was like, cool, this is great, because I can't physically, probably do everything myself. I think that I always can. And then I realized that this is a big task to set up a whole entire wedding on my own, and I have a few hours to do it. So I was like, I need help. I am not Superwoman yet. Yeah, right. So she goes with me, and I pick her up at 10. We got coffees in her hand, and we were just like, let's pick the best music. We're gonna get so pumped up for us. This is the best day ever. So we're driving up to lions, from where? From Fort Collins. Okay, so I think, I think I picked her up, or, yeah, I think I picked her up, and we're driving, everything's great. And then we get to about five minutes from the venue, and there's backed up traffic. I think nothing of it. I'm just like, cool, cool, cool. This is just traffic. This is Colorado. Everyone moves here and it's a weekend, a beautiful weekend in September. Yeah, into September when it's wedding. Leaf peepers, yeah. So I was like, this is perfect leap leaf peeking season. It was like the 21st of September. Oh, yeah. So we're sitting there, and we continue to sit there and sit there longer, and all of a sudden my anxiety is just like through the roof. Why are we sitting here? I have a job to do. I have a whole entire vehicle full of everything that needs to be at this venue that is five minutes from here. So I'm, like, kind of losing my cool because I don't know what to do, and my breakfast was coffee. And like never else, any situation, ever that's. So I don't know what to do. And my friend, who's with me is very chill. She's from, she's from, not here, so she's just like, super chill, relaxed, like, I don't know what the big deal is. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, I am getting very upset because you're too chill, and I'm losing it, and you're telling me to be chill, and I do not know how to do this. We've, we've got some food coming, huh? All the good stuff, some appetizers from the John, some stuff.

Matt Sodnicar 1:40:33
Spoiler alert, that's

SJ Lawyer 1:40:34
where the that's where the table is. Whoa. What do we have? Can of

Matt Sodnicar 1:40:44
this, because

SJ Lawyer 1:40:48
we're needing to let the listeners understand what just is happening before our eyes.

Matt Sodnicar 1:40:55
Yeah, we are being served a Mexican street corn, yeah, something like that. It's a birya

SJ Lawyer 1:41:08
Beef tartare over some

SJ Lawyer 1:41:10
polenta with some

Speaker 1 1:41:15
fry roasted corn, kind of like a Mexican street corn style with a miso cream, the corn,

Speaker 3 1:41:19
cilantro, Kyoto. Cilantro,

SJ Lawyer 1:41:27
Kyoto, some seasonings, yeah, torched egg, some crackers.

Matt Sodnicar 1:41:29
Thank you.

SJ Lawyer 1:41:30
This is not what was served at the wedding. No,

Matt Sodnicar 1:41:40
thank you.

SJ Lawyer 1:41:41
This looks delicious.

SJ Lawyer 1:41:48
Let's try this before I take another breath. Yeah,

Matt Sodnicar 1:41:52
I don't know, good luck. Thanks, buddy.

SJ Lawyer 1:41:56
Very good. Yeah, we're

Matt Sodnicar 1:41:57
diving into Okay,

SJ Lawyer 1:42:02
oh. Uh, where was I losing my coal?

Matt Sodnicar 1:42:05
Yeah, yeah, your friend's super calm. You're not You're full of coffee.

SJ Lawyer 1:42:12
45 minutes of sitting, sitting, all right, just sitting, and all of a sudden the firefighter, he comes. He's like, walking down the line.

Matt Sodnicar 1:42:21
What color were his eyes?

SJ Lawyer 1:42:24
I couldn't tell you, actually, because I was so full of anxiety that I was just like, you're a blob to me, you're speaking blob telling me something I don't want to hear. So he essentially told us that there was a a telephone pole just up the road that fell on a dumpster truck and it was stuck. Oh my God, and they weren't going to get it moved for roughly an hour or more, maybe

Matt Sodnicar 1:42:54
two hours. Okay, so eta to the wedding at this point is what um

SJ Lawyer 1:42:58
the wedding start time, I believe was

Matt Sodnicar 1:43:02
three o'clock, okay, and what time is this now? At 11 o'clock,

SJ Lawyer 1:43:05
okay? So I was like, Okay, well, I have, I have a decision to make. I was like, I have to either. I have to either. Thanks for the Lyme. John, I was like, I have to either sit here and wait for however long it's going to take for them to open the road or find an alternative route.

Matt Sodnicar 1:43:35
Yeah, because you're just not having to get there, you've got to set everything up exactly, yes, at the tables all right.

SJ Lawyer 1:43:42
So I'm at this point, like, the cool that I thought I lost, like it was even more lost, stressing. So I don't want to call the bride, who's my friend, because I don't want to freak her out. But hey, remember that wedding that we're doing today? Yeah, I'm stuck, and all your guests are stuck, and no one can get there. Oh, the guests too, that's right, yeah. So I was like, hey, surprise. So I was like, I don't be the bearer of bad news. So I call the groom because he's way more chill than she is. I'm like, yo, here's the situation. I can't make it because there's a telephone pole on a dump truck. Sounds really dumb, but I can't get there, so I don't know what I should do. Should I wait? Should I go an alternative route? Is there a better way to get there? What do I do? And he looked at a map, and he's like, I Well, it's up to you. Like, I hate that answer, but also he's like, you can either drive a different way and get there in an hour and a half to two hours, or you sit and wait for them to open the road and get there in an hour and a half to two hours. So you roll dice, you figure out what you need to do. So then I call. All my dad. Because I was like, Dad, I need help. I don't know what to do in this situation. He knows roads and maps and stuff. So I was like, maybe help me. Help. Oh, yeah. Like, tell me. Tell me what to do, dad. Like, that's your job. Eye

Matt Sodnicar 1:45:12
in the Sky, right? Yeah. So

SJ Lawyer 1:45:15
he he tells me, essentially the same thing the groom said. And he was like, Oh my gosh, I should have called a woman. My mom should have told me what to do. So at this point, I have to pee so bad. Of course, I had only coffee, and it is running through me. So I pull over, I turn around, because we all have to turn the cars around. So I turned around and I pulled over next to the river because there's nowhere to go the bathroom. And I'm like, I'm not going to sit here and pee in my pants. So I pull over next to the river, and I go down to the river and I pee because I'm like, I can't think when I have to pee. Like, I don't even know. Rule number one in my life, you have to make a decision go to the bathroom first, you're gonna clear your mind when you clear your batter bladder. So peeing down in this beautiful river, thinking about the day and what is in the

Matt Sodnicar 1:46:15
river or by the river, it's a

SJ Lawyer 1:46:21
beautiful mountain creek. And then I made a decision, let's, let's take the long run. Let's, let's get in the car and drive. Because if I want to sit here, I'm gonna be full of even more anxiety knowing that I'm wasting time than if I'm in a car driving. I'm at least doing something. I

Matt Sodnicar 1:46:36
would do that same thing. Yeah, you're taking action. You've got something exactly even perceived control of the

SJ Lawyer 1:46:41
situation, right? And you're not just sitting there wondering if you made the right decision or not, yeah? Because if it didn't open and I was having less time because I'm sitting there, I would have been even more of a wreck. Yeah? So made the decision to drive around, which is, there's only one way to go from lions to the other side of lions, and that's like, to turn around and go down through Nederland, oh yeah, and then cut back up and cut through all these gravel roads. So I am driving like a maniac because I'm just like, I have to get there as fast as possible. If the cop pulls me over or this is my sob story. I'm thinking all of this while driving crazy. Yeah, my friend is like, holding on for a dear life, and she's like, Oh, you sure you need to be driving this fast? I was like, Don't talk to me. This is life or death moment. I have to drive this fast. So driving around and it's gravel roads. I'm feeling like a badass driving this forerunner. I'm like, gotta get me one of these. Like, this is so much better my Saturn. I love this thing. So by time I get to the actual venue, the road opened, the groom's there. Okay, all these people are there. And I'm like, how did you get here? They're like, we drove up like normal. I'm like, You mean you don't have to wait in line, like they turn everyone away. Did they clear the road? And he's like, yeah, we've been here for like, an hour. Oh my gosh, I made the wrong decision. I should have just waited, but in my mind, I knew that I had to make it, I had to roll the dice, and I had to do one or the other. But I was so mad at myself that I didn't just sit and wait, because everyone got through. But again, I would have beat myself up if I just wait and didn't go I

Matt Sodnicar 1:48:29
think you did the right thing, yeah, because you have to play. Yeah. There's the you ever heard the fighter pilots prayer, yeah, yeah, Dear God, don't let me fuck this up. You were on a different clock than everybody else coming up to the reception. So I think you did the right thing, right?

SJ Lawyer 1:48:46
Mentally, I did the right thing, yeah, yeah. So I get up there, my cool starts to settle, because I'm like, All right, I'm here. I have an hour and a half to set up this whole entire wedding. I'm awesome. I can do this, right?

Matt Sodnicar 1:49:01
How much did you allocated, like, in your planning for this? Oh, at

SJ Lawyer 1:49:04
least three hours. Oh, four hours. All right, yeah. So that's why I was panicking a little, because I'm like, I'm losing time, like, my time the clock is ticking. So I started decorating, started doing things. I like to think I'm just this super badass person at not only details, but doing things in a hurry and getting it done well, because I handed out so well in my head. So I'm like, this goes here. This, does this, this. So getting all set up. The problem was, I was like, I needed help from my friend. And I was like, I don't have the time to also babysit right now. And I thought I had more time to help. Have you, like, hold your hand to say, hey, I need this done. I need this done. So I was like, Okay, I'm gonna put you in a task that was because of my reckless driving. All of the table center pieces that were like, Hey, this is table nine with the fly on the end had fishing wire, and all of those got. Tangled with each other. So I was like, need you to untangle these like, this is a really important job, and I don't have time for the patience right now, right? So can you untangle and she's like, I'm terrified of needles, and these flies is poking me. And I'm I'm not enjoying I don't want to do this. I'm not gonna enjoy this. I was like, yeah, so cool. But like, do it anyway. Kind of just needed to just, like, help. So she sat there and she did it, and I came back to check on her later, and she had pulled in some aunt or someone to help her, because she was just like, I just don't like it. It just hurts. I was like, okay, whatever. I don't care. As long as the job's getting done, that's all that matters. I just need someone to do this if you don't want to do it cool, like, I don't know, help someone else. So I managed to get everything set up, except for the arch for the wedding. Okay? I just was running out of time, and I didn't know how to get it set up, because I didn't have the time for that. So I had to pivot and think about a different way of decorating the arch in the moment, in the moment. So I told the mother of the groom what I envisioned. So this is what I want. And she's like, I don't think we have time for that. I said, Okay, well, here's the pivot. Can you maybe help me with the pivot? So she helped me with the pivot, and she helped me get it decorated. It is the one thing about the whole entire wedding that did not look good was the arch. But I'm like, Hey, everyone's staring at the bride and groom and the flowers and everyone else there like we're here for love. We're not here for how beautiful the arch looked, even though I do think it makes a difference, but whatever. So that was the only thing that just didn't get completed. So backing up just a little bit, I had five minutes before the wedding was going to start, and the coordinator, the coordinator comes up to me. And the coordinator was a friend as well, and she's from out of town, from California, and so she was there visiting, and she was like, Hey, I'm the coordinator. Are you all done? Like, can we start the wedding? It's gonna start in five minutes. I'm like, let's be real. No. Wedding starts on the.of hey, it starts at 3pm Can we just be real here? Can we, like, Give me 10 more minutes or something to finish up and get dressed and everything, because I'm still in my sweats, sweating, oh, everything. And my hair is, you know, no makeup on, nothing, I look like a hot mess. And like, can you just, like, give me some time? And she's like, well, I'll give you, like, five minutes. That's Max. I'm like, Oh my gosh. Um, so also I forgot about John in this whole scenario. So I forget about him. So while I'm getting things set up for this wedding, the caterers arrive, and John walks up like I see John, and we just start, like, walking towards each other. And I don't know, there's just something about John that made me feel comfort from the first time we met at the walkthrough, where I was like, yeah, he's cute. Yeah, there's some, like, Girl drama. I know that's going on. And, like, I don't know, he just has this comfort vibe around him for me, and to me, maybe it's because he wasn't childish, with soft eyes dancing around me like the other guy.

Matt Sodnicar 1:53:25
I don't know, was he there that time? Yeah. So

SJ Lawyer 1:53:29
we're walking towards each other through this field, and then we get, like, really close to each other, which, think about it, like most people probably wouldn't come that close, not knowing each other, and we just get really close, and we're like, I was like, get this. This has been my morning. And so I told him everything, of like, Hey, I left at this time. All I had was coffee. There was a dump truck with the telephone pole on it. I had to pee. I peed in a river, by a river. Then I drove. And now I'm here, and I gave him the one two punch, and I just like, remember, we're like, it's so close. And he's just like, staring at me with complete like, Wow, that's amazing. And I'm like, Yeah, isn't that wild? And then I was like, anyway, glad you're here. I got stuff to do. And then I walk off. So

Matt Sodnicar 1:54:20
it's like, you guys clicked and had known each other for years exactly. It

SJ Lawyer 1:54:23
just felt like we had this instant like, Hey, what's up, buddy? Yeah. So I was like, All right, whatever. So finished getting decorated all kinds of so that was five minutes until the wedding, and I realized I needed to put a dress on. I need adult stuff. So I grabbed my stuff. Well, I went to go grab my stuff, but the vehicle, the bride's vehicle that I was driving, got moved by the groom's brother, because they had to move vehicles for some reason, and then he gave the keys back to the bride instead of me. So. There it is five minutes until the wedding starting, and I'm like, I need my I need my clothes, I need my makeup, I need everything that's in the vehicle. And the vehicle is not where it left it, and I don't know who has the keys, and so I'm trying to run around finding who has the keys. Where is this vehicle? Where did it go? So finally, track it down to Oh, the bride has the key for some reason, and everyone's waiting on me at this point, because the whole wedding, I'm the only one that's not ready yet. Yeah, so I'm running around and I find the bride, and I'm like, hi, you look beautiful. Everyone looks beautiful. Do you have your keys, the keys to your vehicle that I drove up here. It's like, weird question. I know, I don't know where they went. Someone took them. I need them. I need my clothes. And so she's like, Oh my gosh, yes, I don't know why I have them. Here's my keys. So my cool, Google, cool, take the keys, get my clothes. And the bathroom up there is powered, I think, by the solar panel, like my solar panel, so the light didn't actually come on until it's dark outside. So because it's three o'clock, the sun's still up, it's kind of dark in this bathroom, because the lighting is not great. So I'm like, awesome. I get to get dressed for a wedding in the dark. This is gonna be great. So I put a dress on and don't know what my dog's saying, put my tried to put my makeup on in the dark, you know, did the best I could. I'm like, I'm, you know, I know what I'm doing by now, yeah, I'm sure it looks fine. I'm sure. And then I'm, I walk out and I'm like, Cool. Everything's good, right? Everything's great. And I get to the ceremony, I'm like, Okay, I'm set. Let's get the show on the road. So I sit down in the very last row because I'm just too full of anxiety still that I'm like, I can't walk down this aisle and sit somewhere farther up. I can be able to run after this ceremony and finish something that maybe I just forgot that I had you so sitting in the back row, and this is a very important piece of information I should share, I had a boyfriend.

Matt Sodnicar 1:57:13
Way to bury the lead.

SJ Lawyer 1:57:15
His name is beam.

Matt Sodnicar 1:57:19
Was he there? Uh huh.

SJ Lawyer 1:57:21
He was there, and he was sitting. I was sitting next to him. I said, Hey, hi. How are you? It's been a stressful day. Hope your day's been better. Um, let's get this one in the row. So sitting next to him, and he's already annoyed with me, because I'm me. I'm full of anxiety. I'm just running all over the place like an ADHD person that can't, like, call myself, and he's like, just stop what you're doing. Just enjoy it. Like, that's not my job. My job is to decorate this place and make sure it's flawless for the bride.

Matt Sodnicar 1:57:55
You're not a guest. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 1:57:56
I'm like, I'm not a guest. I'm doing a job. And if I get to enjoy myself, I'll enjoy myself, but I have a job show, and he didn't get that. So Red flag number 999 um, anyway, wedding happens. It was beautiful. I cried. Everyone cried. Lovely. The second it's done, I am bolting towards the bar so I might I need a stiff drink, stat, so I'm like, pour me a gin and tonic, because that's my go to drink. Let's get this show on the rib. So John is the caterer, and he has his which is called lick skillet catering, and he is up there with, I'm

Matt Sodnicar 1:58:41
gonna cut that part out. No, no free advertising. I mean, it's, oh, wait, well, I did get appetizers. All right, keep going catering.

SJ Lawyer 1:58:53
So he's up there doing this really cool. I want to call it. He has a name for it, yakitori grill. Oh, it's called, he made his own yak Tori girls, because he's a man of, I want to make it instead of buy it brand new. Because why would I waste my money on something brand new that I can make? You know? So he made it. But I think there were some issues as far as, like, one of them, like, caught on fire that they had to solve. I think they forgot tablecloths for some of the tables. Also, the coordinator set up everyone got a mug that was their mug for the night, for their all their beverages, and set up this whole wall of mugs. And this was like, where your your seating was, so you'd get your mug had your name on it, and said, Hey, you're sitting at this table. So it's a cool setup, but she set it up where the happy hour was supposed to be set up. So that was also a hiccup in the whole setup that John was like, what? But he pivoted, because that's what he does, and he got it all set so it worked. Even though there was a mini fire at one point and a mini like disaster or whatever. So that's all good. I'm drinking my gin. I am having such a better time because I have alcohol flowing through my system. Like, thank God there's alcohol. This gin is perfect. So the wedding carries on. It's what's the reception. Reception is going on, and I'm actually still running around making sure everything's good, everything's set. I'm just this, like, turned perfectionist at this point. And then I noticed people are trying to take pictures, and the iPads not working, because we used an iPad on a tripod. Oh, for the photo booth. Yeah, for the photo booth. So then I'm like, I gotta fix it. Meanwhile, my boyfriend's like, oh my gosh, let it go. And I was like, I can't. If you can't take pictures, you can take pictures. Like, that's an issue, yeah, so I'm like, trying to fix it. And dinner is being served. It's family style for 180 people. So there's just multiple plates of everything, just put on every table, which, if you think about it, it's mind blowing, like in terms of how much food and how plates that John had to provide to say, hey, here's, it's Asian style. So here's, here's your rice, here's your veggies, here's this, here's that, all on different plates for each table. Absolutely insane. So food gets set I'm still just on a liquid diet. Apparently, I think I had a bite of a carrot, and

Matt Sodnicar 2:01:27
I was like, I'm so not coffee, carrots and gin, yeah, all right, yeah, sweet coffee,

SJ Lawyer 2:01:30
carrots and gin. I'm on the sea diet, except for gin doesn't start

Matt Sodnicar 2:01:36
with the sea. So we're close. I just saw where you're going. It works. It works. And

SJ Lawyer 2:01:41
I just like, I think when you get so full of anxiety, you have a hard time eating with you, where it's just like, my brain is just like, Nah, girl, we got other shit going on up here. We don't got time to put something in your mouth and actually fuel you. We've got to figure out all these other problems. So that's where I was at. So I'm like, I don't want to eat. And then I realized, okay, we need to put the donuts on the donut tier that I brought so I can't eat. I have another task to do. And the coordinator at this point, I don't know, was like already wasted from the second the wedding got over. So my pre gaming. Much were you? I thought you had a job to do. So she was gone, like, just on the dance floor already doing whatever, not her job. So I'm like, Okay, I thought she was supposed to set up a donut tier. I'll do it. She's not there. I don't know where she got so amazing. I go over and my boyfriend made these donut tears. They were a little bit too big, but whatever he tried, he did a good job. And the bride had mini donuts that she wanted to have as part of the dessert. So I'm setting up these mini donuts. And then John pops over. I was like, Oh, hey. Like, everything looked good. I had a bite of carrot, like, I'm sure it was delicious, and he's like, Oh, you didn't eat. And I was like, I don't got time for that. Like, I'm just, I'm on this liquid diet right now, unintentionally on a liquid diet. And so then he's just chatting with me, and we're giggling, because there's just like chemistry forming, and it's just this like, ball of energy that's just like growing and growing between us. And all of a sudden I drop a donut, and my first reaction was, you can't waste a donut. Like, are you kidding me? So I pick up the donut, and I was like, but I can't serve the donut because it just fell on the ground. So I was like, I have to eat this donut I have to sacrifice yes to myself. So I look at him, and instantly was like, without even like, really thinking, I was just like, will you share this donut with me? And he's like, Yeah, of course. So then we share this donut. And come to find out, what I've learned through the years is that all of John's employees at this wedding knew that he was crushing on me, so they're all in this background cheering like, Dude, she's alone. You should go swoop in right now. Dude, she's doing this alone. Like, go talk to her here. So I had no idea, but he's being, he's got his little cheering squad in the background, pushing him to be like, Dude, she's over there. She's over here. And then I also found out that he, after the initial meeting at the walkthrough, Jake was like, Oh yeah, she's cute. Like, I think I'm gonna swoop in. And John's like, bro, give me one girl. You get all the girls. Give me one girl, like, give me this girl. Let me have a chance with this girl, instead of you swooping in like you always do. So Jake was or I keep saying his name, man just kind of beat that out. It's hard to beep him. Uh. Anyway, he, he was just like, Fine, whatever. So John was like, Cool, cool, cool. I. I want to crush on this girl. So then he told all his employees, because I don't know, you know John, he talks a bit. Everyone knows everything, so employees know and tell him to swoop in. So then we share a donut, and then I'm like, Cool. Well, moving on. Have to go back sit with my boyfriend, which he didn't know, but and a boyfriend, and how

Matt Sodnicar 2:05:22
long had you been with your boyfriend at that point? About

SJ Lawyer 2:05:25
six years. Oh, but it was five years too long. And I had been trying to plan, I guess, how to break up with him, but we had a huge friend group of like, 20 plus people, and there's 14 of us that were, like, tight knit, and then the rest of them were just like, floaters in the group, and we were like, at the core of it. So it's hard to be like, hey, like you're we're convenient for each other, and that's our relationship. And if anything changes with us that disrupts our whole entire friend group and base, and that's going to be like an earthquake that's shattering, because then everyone has to choose a side, because that's what

Matt Sodnicar 2:06:09
everyone does, even though that's what happens. Yeah, they don't so do, yeah. So I just kind

SJ Lawyer 2:06:12
of sat in this relationship of, hey, this is not really a great relationship, but it's convenient, and I'm not lonely, because at least we have, we have each other. So I guess I'll wait here until something better comes. I don't know, like, really terrible, really terrible.

Matt Sodnicar 2:06:30
You're not the first person that's done that, by the way,

SJ Lawyer 2:06:32
no, and that's comforting, knowing I'm not alone in this world, knowing that it's a natural thing. Yeah, we all just want to be loved, and sometimes it's the wrong person, until we find the right person. Right person. So John came and got me after the donuts were out, we shared a donut. Had another fire explosion moment of this donut sharing. And he's like, we have a problem. And I'm like, talk to me, like, what's going on? I love solving problems. And he's like, so do I was like, however, I'm sick of solving problems today. But like, let's throw it at me. He's like, Well, the groom wanted an ice cream cake, and there's no freezer on this property, so the ice cream cake got put in the cooler, and I don't know how long it's been sitting there, but it's starting to cave in. So what do we do? Do we bring out the cake now? Do we wait? I don't know where the coordinator is. She kind of seems like she's falling over there, so I don't really know what to do. So I was like, alright, let's I'm gonna make the call. We're gonna pull out the ice cream cake, because there was no cake cutting ceremony. So I was like, Cool, let's just pull out the cake and you guys will start cutting the slices. And maybe we'll get the DJ guy to make an announcement that, hey, ice creams ready. So are your donuts? Go ahead and start grabbing it before it melts. So I was like, this is this is the direction. Let's do this. Let's also do more food. I love this. Wow. This looks like something you serve with wedding. I don't think it is, but better rice? Explain this one to a Chef John

Speaker 3 2:08:26
Chinese, five spice braised pork belly covered with some rice. It's like cilantro rice with some veggies we have, we have some

SJ Lawyer 2:08:36
backyard green beans. Oh, yeah, from my parents and broccoli.

Matt Sodnicar 2:08:41
God, looks amazing, also for my

SJ Lawyer 2:08:43
parents, huh? Sorry, I

SJ Lawyer 2:08:44
had to hodgepodge this one the other pretty quick.

Matt Sodnicar 2:08:47
Looks incredible. Thank you. Hell yeah, you're spoiling me. I'm going to expect food from podcast guests from now on. That should

SJ Lawyer 2:08:58
be your rule. If you're on the podcast, you better bring food that

Matt Sodnicar 2:09:03
tartare was amazing, dude. Thank you.

SJ Lawyer 2:09:06
He was, he has it's been telling me about it. It delivered. That was great. Take a tiny bite. Yeah? So ice cream cake. Yeah? So the bride's mom. I think it's a tradition where a bride's mother will give her a cutting knife, a cake cutting knife and a serving. I think that's tradition. I don't know. I didn't have a traditional wedding, yeah, um, so she gave her this, like, cute, glittery, handled cake cutting knife and cake set, whatever. So I pull it out because I had it, and I was like, here it is. I need you guys to do the cake cutting. I'll check back in with you in a minute. And so I start cutting. But the first. Just slice, because it's an ice cream cake, the handle breaks off the knife, so the knife is stuck in the cake and the handle is in the hand. So I didn't get very far, because that happened, like, right after I said, Okay, you guys do this. I'm gonna try to eat another bite of a carrot or something, and they're standing there. Like, what do we do? The handle just broke. I was like, Okay, well, throw away the knife, because that's not worth keeping. And I guess try the cake serving portion, like that tool to try cutting it. So he tries that, and that handle breaks as well. So I was like, awesome. We are. We are winning with things happening really well today. So one of their employees had a really nice knife with them for catering, I guess. And so they got that knife, got the cake cut, and everything was fine. Got it served, whatever. Everyone moved on. I don't even know if the bride got cake, because everyone's drunk at this point, which also, I think at that point I I had probably a half a bottle of gin to myself, because I just kept going back and going back. So I'm like, God, this isn't like, this is such an anxiety day. So at one point, John and I had had a conversation about poop emojis? Yeah, I don't know how or why that came up. Is there more than one? Well, there's just the one, right? The one poop emoji. But I think I was talking about how funny I thought it was and how cool it was. I don't know. I was just like, oh, poop emojis are so funny. I don't know it was rude. So then he comes back and finds me again, like later, and he's like, I have to show you something. And I'm into this guy. He's like, my jam. He's so cool. I forgot even had a boyfriend. I don't know. I don't even know where he went. He's somewhere I just, I don't even know it was. And so I follow John back into this back kitchen area, and there is a giant poop emoji, like blown up, inflatable poop emoji sitting in this kitchen. I was like, What are the odds that I just told you I have this weird obsession with the poop emoji, which is really weird to say out loud. And then all of a sudden, there's a poop emoji here. I'm like, it's like, the stars are aligning for us right now. So that was really fun, um, and then I go back and dance some more and drink some more gin and tonic, and I don't even know my name at that point. Um, I should also add this part in, because I got dressed in the dark, I wasn't able to actually look at my full ensemble, and I had the most visible panty line all day in my dress. And John has to this day, commented on how much he loved my panty line.

Matt Sodnicar 2:13:01
Okay, so as a dumb guy, is it because the color of your panties were off or because it was the wrong style for the dress? Good question.

SJ Lawyer 2:13:12
It was the wrong style for the dress, okay? For clarification, they were nude underwear, okay, on a white dress filled with tons of flowers.

Matt Sodnicar 2:13:24
And I actually know that. Fact, it's like, if you're gonna wear a white dress, don't wear white exactly where

SJ Lawyer 2:13:30
you wanna. Yeah, yeah. So that was fun,

Matt Sodnicar 2:13:34
which I have not worn, but I've been told right in removing said garments, but not putting them on. So you've

SJ Lawyer 2:13:43
never had a bad experience yourself. This white underwear, my white linen pants are showing, yeah, so that, that pendulum, apparently, was very, very prominent. So whatever, I don't care. I don't know about it. I'm just, you know, a bottle of gin and tonic back there. Yeah, I don't care. The donkey, Don and I'm having a good time. And John also owns corn doggies. This is an ad for corn doggies food truck, um, which was the late night snack. So, oh, cool. I didn't know that. Yes, they booked lick skillet catering for Hey, feed us our happy hour and our dinner. And then book corn doggies for our 10pm 11pm whatever time I even know That's brilliant, yeah, and then have corn doggies for a snack. It's not fun on the corn doggies end, because you have to stay up late and serve food to a bunch of drunks. But it's fun for the wedding guests. They're like, Oh my gosh, I need substance, and I want a corn dog. So I went and got a corn dog. At one point I. And I got a lobster dog. And I'll be pretty honest, it was not good. I was like, What is this? This is not great. And I told Joan. I was like, This is not a great corn dog. And he's like, Hey, we're just trying it out. I don't know if it's gonna work. And I was like, go back to what you do and do the other ones. This is not great. That was a very forward person talking to someone that I thought I knew for years.

Matt Sodnicar 2:15:24
Um, that's interesting. You're crushing on this dude, yeah, and now you've torpedoed

SJ Lawyer 2:15:33
the power of gin and tonic.

Matt Sodnicar 2:15:36
It does wonders for you. Truth serum, good on you, though, right? Also,

SJ Lawyer 2:15:41
gin and tonic made me very brave, where certain songs were coming on and a guy was sitting, a friend was sitting in a chair, so I immediately was like, I got this liquid courage of gold right now, where, apparently I have a boyfriend somewhere, but this guy's really cute, and I'm crushing on him, and I feel like I'm invincible, because I did all this decorations and I conquered the day. I put out fires, I did all this stuff. So clearly I can do anything I want. I'm an idiot. But I went over to my friend, I started giving him a lap dance because I thought I could. So John is actually walking up to me at this point carrying a beer, trying to be like, Hey, do you can I get you a beer? And he came over to me. He was like, Can I give you this beer? And I was like, Nah, dude, I'm I'm only drinking, Jen, I can't take your beer. So I also didn't want to accept it, because I was like, my boyfriend's over there, and he's like, Well, this

Matt Sodnicar 2:16:44
is during the lap dance, yeah, right

SJ Lawyer 2:16:46
before the lap Okay, okay. And John's like, well, they said that someone drank all the gin, and the gin is gone. I was like, what? Someone drank all the gin? He's like, pretty sure it was you. And I was like, No, I would never drink all the gin like that's that's probably me. Okay, that makes sense. So I turned down his beer and started giving this guy a lap dance. So then John immediately pulls a chair up, I love this, and gets in line, all right, if you're giving him a lap dance, giving me a lap dance. And all of a sudden it was like this line of three guys in chairs, and I gave my friend a brief one, because I'm like, You're my friend, and your girlfriend's or your wife actually was right there, and she's chill, like, there's nothing like weird there. And then the other guy was another one of John's employees, and he was he had a wedding ring on. So I was like, Oh, this is safe. I feel safe doing that. And then John was there, and I was like, Oh, hell no, I cannot give him a lap dance, because I'll enjoy that. He'll enjoy that. And my boyfriend's right there. So I was like, it'll look too real, yeah. So I immediately got up after the second lap dance and just start walking away. And John was like, come on.

Matt Sodnicar 2:18:02
I can totally see him saying that

SJ Lawyer 2:18:05
I'm locked danced out. I don't have to tell you. I just forgot to do it. What other drunken things happen? Not even know. Anyway, it gets to the end of the night, um, everyone is so drunk don't care about anything, they just leave, like everyone does at weddings, because I brought all the decorations, tear down all the decorations. So here's this sloppy gin and tonic girl with a visible panty line, walking around zigzags, trying to get all my stuff, tear it down, get it in my vehicle, try to figure it all out. And John is also trying to clean up. While he shouldn't have had to clean up, it was not his responsibility, but everyone left, so he had to do it. So he looked very tired, and for some reason I have a memory. At that moment, I was talking to him, like, oh, man, this sucks. Like, he have always cleaning up to do. And then he brought up the fact that he had two daughters, and I was like, Oh, you have children. I'm a I'm a hot mess. I don't think I can. Like, I didn't say this to Him. I was just thinking like, oh, I can't do children because I'm clearly a hot mess. Like, I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm on gin and tonic, no way.

Matt Sodnicar 2:19:31
But your future, your future casting, you're thinking about exactly like, yeah, you you're thinking about this working out. You want it to work out

SJ Lawyer 2:19:38
exactly, which is interesting that we do when we have instant chemistry with someone, we immediately visualize the future instead of like, I don't even know if this is why would why did I go to the future instead of the here and now and get to know you instead of like, during the future? It's crazy, especially when you're on a bottle of gin and tonic, like it does not a bottle. All the bottles I drank, them all. Every bottle in the house I drank, it was all in my system. But

Matt Sodnicar 2:20:06
I think you have to live that way. And I'll get back to that story like I have to believe that you I need to think that way, because at times in my life, when I've been in dark places, I don't like feeling that way, and in thinking about the possibilities and being excited and being optimistic, you can choose either one, and one of them makes me feel a lot better. Yeah,

SJ Lawyer 2:20:31
that's true. I think that's what it was. I was like, Hey, I'm unhappy my current situation. Yeah, he seems like a fun vet. Oh, but you got kids. Oh, man, I don't know. I don't know if I can do that. Um, let's see later on down the road, he told me, um, so my roommate, I had two roommates at the time. They were both there at the wedding. One of them was like a best man, and he was really annoying, which kind of forgot about him. But he also was clipping all of the the flies off of my table centers and stealing them because he was also a fly fisherman, and he's like, Oh, I'm gonna take this fly. So he's going around all these tables. Someone told me. So I went over, and I was like, his name, beep. What are you doing? This is my centerpiece. I created this. And I like, like, let one loose on him. I'm like, buddy, buddy with his dad. So his dad was like, Yeah, you listen to SJ. What do you do when you sit your ass down? Like, how dare you do this? Right? Your dad's on my side, and I know your mom is too. She was sitting here. So I was getting so mad because he was clipping them all, and I was like, I told the groom I would deliver all of these flies back to him, and now you were ruining what I said I would do. Oh, so I was getting so angry him. Anyway, my other roommate, who was a girl, I went to college with her, so I've known her for years. She actually knew John. So the story starts to get weird. So she knew who John was. She knew who John's ex girlfriend at this point was, and her best friend worked on corn doggies. So there was a lot of like, connecting things going on here. And so that was fun. And so John was talking to my roommate, and was just like, catching up, and be like, Hey, what's going on? Blah, blah, blah. And she was just having a good time. And then the coordinator, the drunk coordinator, who was, you know, doing somersaults everywhere because she couldn't do a job. She brought her boyfriend who had braces. That's important, because this

Matt Sodnicar 2:22:50
helps, and he's not a high school I'm guessing he's not nice, okay? He's not in high school, which I mean, nothing, no shame against on fixing your teeth. No, I

SJ Lawyer 2:22:56
love that for people. One of my really good friends right now is going through that phase, and I love that. For him, it just like paints the picture of what happened. Here's this, like, big beefy guy from California with these, like, mouthful braces, and he comes up to John, and he's like, Stop flirting with the guests, do your job. And John was like, what the

Matt Sodnicar 2:23:19
beat? Oh, you can cuss. What

SJ Lawyer 2:23:23
the fuck are you saying? Like you don't know me. You don't know that I know this person. I don't even know who you are. You're just telling me how to do my job like I am not a slave. I have been doing my job. I am taking a break to say hi to someone I know. So they almost got in a fight, and John's employees had to pull him aside so he didn't get in a fight, because he was just like, on edge. So these are all fun things I found out behind the scenes. But fast forward to the end of the night, and everyone's leaving. I found out John has kids. I'm like, who am I? What's happening? Where are we going in life? Like, I don't know what to do with myself. And he, like, comes up to the window and he's like, are you okay to drive? I was like, No, do I have a choice though? Like, I don't even know where I'm supposed to go. Hey, Marvin, let's come over here. He's fine. He won't leave mom aside, and that's why he's done her whole time. So I was like, I'm probably not good to drive, but all I have to do is, like, cross this road and then I'm staying over there, but I just have to get there. So he was like, Okay, well, as long as you think you're okay to do that. And I was like, Yeah, I'm sure I'm fine. Immediately after I start crying. So I'm like, I'm so drunk I don't know where I'm going. I don't know where anybody is. That guy was super hot. I don't know what's going on in my life, and I was just like, this bundle of of a mess, all the stress from in the morning, it's coming. All the stresses came out. And I'm pretty sure at that point we exchanged numbers, just because he's like, hey, just want to make sure you know he's doing the whole like, I just want to make sure you get home. Okay? I was like, I don't need, I don't need your number. Like, I don't want it. Yeah, but do I need it? No, I got a boyfriend. And I thought I told him I had a boyfriend, but according to him, I didn't at that point, so I don't know who's who's telling the truth here. I don't know. So I get across the road safely. I make it there, and then I cry because I'm like, I don't know where I'm going. I'm lost, and we're staying in like, these tiny homes, and I don't know my boyfriend is he's gone. He hasn't talked to me all night. So I'm like, I don't know. I guess I'm just saving this one. This one looks good. I don't know. This looks like a great place to land. So that happened, wedding happened. I made it, and excuse me, Bert, and then the next day happens, and everyone's hungover, I told the bride a little bit of what happened. I was like, these are the fires that happened, that I put out so you didn't have to worry about your wedding. I just feel like it's important for you to know my friendship and what I did for you. What did anyone else do you know I was like, everyone else was wasted, but I was wasted and at a job, like, I'm really awesome. I don't know. I was trying to build myself up. So I leave. I had to go on a work trip the next week do that. And then the bride was going on our honeymoon, which most people I feel like these days don't go on their honeymoon right after the wedding, right? But this couple, they waited like a day, and then they went on their honeymoon. And my work trip was, like, two days. So I was like, okay, cool. And then she texts me, and she's like, Hey, so the caterer, he took all of the dishes for us and was going to wash them. And I was like, wow, that's that's a lot for the caterer to do, to take all your dishes and wash them. That's a That's a lot. And she's like, Yeah, he volunteered. And I was like, wow, this is a stand up guy. And she's like, Yeah, so also, like, we ended up with this knife because we couldn't cut the ice cream cake. I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, that happened. So you have that knife. And she's like, Yeah. So what I'm saying is I need you to get in contact with him, to get those dishes back for me, like, for me, and then give him the knife that we found with our stuff. And I was like, not a problem. I got you. I will happily. I will very much this, this task. So text John. I was like, hey, thanks again for such a fun event. All your help. Like, you know, trying to be like, how do I have a conversation when I don't know you, but I think you're really hot. And so I was like, Hey, I have all this stuff, or I have this knife or whatever I need to get to you, and you have stuff that you need to get to the bride, but that can be me. So let's get together, and I'll just buy you a beer, because you just did so much for me, and we just solve all these problems together. So let me help you by buying you a beer. Not only helping him, but I'm just like, let me give you a beer. Yeah, I want to see you. I'm like, I don't know if I could scream it as loud as I wanted to then, but I was like, Oh my gosh, I need to see you. Like, just get a beard. So he was like, Absolutely, like, not even blinking an eye. So I'm like, Cool. You're

Matt Sodnicar 2:28:11
gonna give him the beer that you rejected. For me, exactly. Ah.

SJ Lawyer 2:28:16
I was like, Cool. So we met at, yeah, Nick's Italian, because it was like, right down the road from my house. And what turned into, let me buy you one beer turned into four hours and multiple beers and food and everything, and telling our life stories to each other, that's awesome. And it just turned into this, like, oh my gosh, this is my person. I barely know you, but you're my person, and I know that you're my person with barely knowing you. I'm like, that's insane. And up until this point, I don't think I believed in love at first sight, or any of that. Like, oh, I met this guy and instantly knew who is my love my life. I was just like, That's bogus. Like, that doesn't happen for anybody. Like, you have to work, sometimes you have to be friends first. Like, it just happens over time. But like, meeting John, it was, Nope, you're this guy, and I just know it. There's just, like, no second guessing or anything. It was just like, instant you're, you're this guy. So hey, Marvin, why don't you get out of there? Thank you. So we had a such a fun time. And then he was living with a roommate at the time, and he went home after that and said, If she asked me to marry her right now, I would say yes. So we instantly, like we both, had the same feelings of each other after we left that one beer moment.

Matt Sodnicar 2:29:43
So it wasn't just that you were unhappy with the other guy, and it wasn't that it was new. It was something completely different, right? I just That's cool, yeah. So

SJ Lawyer 2:29:55
then I had a bigger hand, like, problem of hands, because then John was like, hey, the. Is fun. Can I like, see you again? And I thought I told him I had a boyfriend, and he was just being super cool. And I was like, No, I have a boyfriend, after all of this has happened. And he was like, what? I was like, I thought you knew, yeah. I was like, he was at the wedding. He was there. I was sitting next to him. I was dancing with him, the full, like, dance, where at one point I was like, how did you not know? Because we're a dude, yeah? And I was like, and I thought I told you, and he's like, You never told me. I never saw you as a dude. I was like, Well, you were blind, I don't know. So first, first little fight, you know, daddy did a good boyfriend. So anyway, fast forwarding turned into Hey, he had to go to work trip for two weeks. And I told him, Hey, I really like you, and this is going to go somewhere for the long haul, I just need to figure out my current situation. I was like, Give me time to figure it out. You're going away for two weeks, so give me time to figure it out. In that time, he never stopped texting me, like every day he texts me. And I was like, this is not the definition of letting me think, Who is this guy, and why are you so persistent? But same time, I was like, Oh my gosh, I love this. This is that new, fresh, exciting relationship, whatever you're just like, texting, yeah. So in that two weeks, I made the decision, all right, I have to break up with my boyfriend. How'd you do all this kind of stuff? And you guys are living together, right? Yeah, so the boyfriend was living in the house, okay? He was also one of my roommates at the time. No, did he move? I can't actually remember. He was my roommate at one point, all right, which I think is why we started dating, and then he moved out and got his own house. But I can't remember at this point if he had gotten his own house, or if he was, I think he did, yeah, he moved out and was living in his own place, because I had two other roommates at that point. Then, yeah, guy and a girl, but that wasn't the guy that was okay, confusing, um, so right before John went on his trip, though, he stopped by because he's like, Hey, I I made you something, and I just wanted to drop it off before I leave town. He made me poop emoji brownies with eyeballs on it. I was like, Oh my gosh, is this amazing? I don't know. I don't understand this poop emoji obsession, or where it came from, or any of this, but thank you. And so then he stayed a little bit longer, and then the guy roommate saw me talking to him, and then started this rumor that I was cheating on, Kevin. Oops, so the name, it's hard to not say names cheating on, what's his butt, and everyone started to just, like, form this opinion about me. I was like, Dude, he just gave me people, Mooji brownies, like nothing happened. I never touched him, like nothing's going on. Yeah, still somewhat professional. I was like, mentally, yeah, I was, because I was, I was done with the other guy, and I was already moving on to someone else. Like, mentally, yeah, I was like, but emotionally, there was nothing there with the other guy either. Yeah. So I was like, in a way, yes, I was totally cheating. But the same time, I was like, this relationship Ben brilliant has been dead for at least five years, so I was like, I don't know what's worse. And no one knew that either. So our friend group didn't see they don't see the, yeah, the internals of relationship. They just see what they want to see, or they see what we want them to see. So they're not going to understand, like, Oh, you guys have a really bad relationship, but you're just like, comfortable. Like, that sucks, you know, like they're not going

Matt Sodnicar 2:33:51
to see that. It's the Instagram fallacy, exactly, yeah, reels Exactly,

SJ Lawyer 2:33:57
exactly. That's perfect way of putting it. So then it was, you know, John leaves, and I figure out how to break up with the boyfriend I do, and it was great. Everything worked out. And I was like, Okay, we're moving forward. And then John comes back, and it was just like, we just clicked and connected. And that was the first time, well, I guess third time I've seen him since, since the wedding, everything else was via text message, getting know each other, and it was just like we were inseparable, and we've just never had a day that we haven't talked to each other since, which is kind of crazy thing about too. He's made it a point to be like, I'm not gonna let one day go without actually saying something to you, even if it's like a hi, I love you, or whatever it is, you always make sure there's like something. So that's really cool. So future, I'm not friends with any of those people anymore, because that rumor started, and because I broke up with the guy, and then everyone. Chose sides, and I guess I was outcasted and canceled because I chose love and I chose what I needed for me, I know. So I was like, All right, you guys want to cancel me. That's fine. I don't need you, which it's hard. That's also a different topic of being in your 30s and having a group of friends that's really tight knit, or what you thought was tight knit, and then you realize they drop you so fast. And I was like, wow, I wasn't really your friend. If you just dropped me because you listened to something that someone told you that they didn't actually know. Yeah, I was like, That sucks. So I spiraled for a couple years

Matt Sodnicar 2:35:41
of I can see that because you was like 20 people you said in this program,

SJ Lawyer 2:35:45
yeah, upwards, yeah, yeah. Well,

Matt Sodnicar 2:35:49
I'll tell you a secret why I wanted to hear this story. Yeah. So after we recorded John's episode, we went to the town pump, and you were giving me the highlights of this. And this joke that popped in my head is not so what I was going to do is try to stay with a straight face, like I'm feeling the same way about you that you felt about John. It was this is I've only seen this happen a couple times, like in real life. There was a time when you were kind of CO telling this story, and you probably don't even remember this, but you were looking at him, and it was kind of that Instagram meme where it's like, get somebody who looks at you like this, yeah? And the way you were looking at him, I was like, I was I was rapture is not the right word, but I was captivated by the way you were looking at him. That's love, baby, yeah? And it was really cool to witness. So

SJ Lawyer 2:37:01
he needed to be here.

Matt Sodnicar 2:37:03
No, no, it is fun

SJ Lawyer 2:37:05
to hear his banter back and forth of like, No, this is what I this is my perspective of what happened versus what I thought. He had his time. He did have his time. He doesn't. He'd be

Matt Sodnicar 2:37:14
talking the whole time, yeah, but I thought it was important to know the wedding story was, was fun and fascinating, but where it ended up, and then, just as I've gotten to know you both, but it was that look that you gave him, that I was like, I wanted to explore this a

SJ Lawyer 2:37:33
lot. I love that. I do love him, but it is funny too. This shows, yeah, I think it is crazy to think about how you meet, that you can meet a caterer at a wedding, that someone else is getting married and their focus is their love, and then you find your true love at a wedding, which is, it's like one of those meet cutes that you just you see in the movies, like, what is it the wedding? Like the wedding planner, which, by the way, that came out when I was in the seventh grade, and what's his name, Matthew McConaughey. He's the main guy in there, and JLo, she's the she's the wedding planner.

SJ Lawyer 2:38:12
Oh yeah. So

SJ Lawyer 2:38:13
I've always loved that, because I've always had this, this, like, back of my mind. I love weddings, I love this idea, I love this whole thing. I want to do this kind of stuff, and I always loved it. And in seventh grade, we had this stupid thing as as girls, we're like, oh, well, these girls, they have actual boyfriends, but we can have boyfriends too. They just don't have to know that they're not real. Let's, like, make up our own boyfriends. And I remember going to the theater and seeing the wedding planner and being like, dude, Matthew McConaughey. He's so hot. He's my crush, and his name was Steve in the movie. And I was like, my boyfriend's name is Steve. And I remember going around school trying to tell everyone, like, yeah, I have a boyfriend. His name's Steve, guys. He just goes to different school.

Matt Sodnicar 2:38:58
Why don't you believe Yeah, it was so funny. But

SJ Lawyer 2:39:02
I just remember, like, you know that movie is just like that, where you know the he's supposed to be getting married, she's the wedding planner they meet. In this instance, it's like that movie thing, which just seems like it's one of those things like, this is never reality. You're not going to meet someone this

Matt Sodnicar 2:39:18
way. And then I's because they're true

SJ Lawyer 2:39:19
Exactly, yeah. And then it happens. And then here we are, now married.

Matt Sodnicar 2:39:25
How long you been married?

SJ Lawyer 2:39:27
Four years this October, which, this is the cutest part of this whole entire story. I think, well, we got married in 2020, which is covid. So We eloped because covid, yeah. And I was dead set on an October wedding, because that's like my favorite month. Weather's beautiful, trees are beautiful, Everything's beautiful. And I was like, I just, let's just do it. Actually, I should probably tell you the engagement story, because it's even worse at my worst, I'm. Even better, and maybe ghetto, we got an inflatable John got an inflatable hot tub. And I was extremely pissed off because he got a huge tax return, and we were living together this point, and he got this really big tax return. And I was like, dropping the hints, like, Hey, maybe I don't know, by ring with a tax return. Like, I think that we should, like, move this life of ours together towards marriage, yeah? And he, he was just like, Man, I'm ready for that. I was like, Oh my gosh. Like, you are just awful sometimes. Like, just like, propose already. Like, let's just move this show the road. And so then he's surprising me, and he's like, I bought an inflatable hot tub. I was like, Are you kidding me? I literally do not agree with this purchase, but whatever, blow it up. Let's get this baby going. So it's like snowing and it's March and it's 2020, and he's filling it up. And his youngest daughter was living with us at a time, and we're getting it going. And then he was like, Oh, this is the best. And I was like, All right, whatever. This is cool. Like, I approve of this purchase, but I'm gonna make you think that I'm pissed off because I wanted to ring so I hop in the hot tub, and I was like, Hey, take my picture. Like, I'm not that person where I'm like, take my picture. But I was like, This is so cool. We have a hot tub. I was like, take my picture of me in my denim, looking jumper, swimsuit. It's swimsuit material, but it looks like I'm wearing overalls, super dialed. And I'm like, take a picture of me in this with my beer. I was like, I'm so cool. So my take a picture. So he does, and then he gets in, and I was like, you're kind of acting weird, but whatever. And all of a sudden he brings up this, it's a fortune cookie lock, like an actual sized fortune cookie, okay? And he pulls it up. And I was like, What the hell is this? Is this a like a paper. What do you call those things like you put on your desk to hold your paper? Oh, paperweight, paperweight. I was like, Why did you give me a fortune cookie? That's kind of weird. But like, Okay, that's cool. And so then he just kind of looks at me, like, no. Like, shake it. So I like, shook. And I was like, oh, there's something inside. And I was like, Ooh, this is fun, like mystery. And I open it, there's a ring. So I was like, you motherfucker, an inflatable hot tub to propose to me, which was not his initial plan, it just the moment felt right, and that's what he did. So got proposed to and engaged in March, the day the world shut down, 2020 and I was like, I see what's going on here. The world's shutting down, and you want me to commit to you, because the world's shutting down and you're afraid that if I leave you'll never meet anyone. I get it. So I was like, of course. I said yes. And then I was like, well, let's just, like, plan our wedding, because I do this stuff for a living, so let's just do it. So six months later, in October, we got married, but it was an elopement hybrid, because I didn't want to have everyone, all my family and all his family, come for the wedding. I was like, let's just do our parents. Keep it small, and then we'll have a big party later, once it's not covid And people can come out and breathe within other people's distances. So I was like, let's just do that. So that worked. And then the fires happened, which is ironic, because there's fires now, yeah, but the fire was up canyon. Canyon was it called Cameron. Cameron cast, yeah, okay, yeah. So they were also going into Rocky Mountain, and we were just gonna go up to Rocky Mountain and get married up there, which I had a spot reserved everything while the roads were closed, s park was closed, rocking homes. Where

Matt Sodnicar 2:43:52
have I heard this story before?

SJ Lawyer 2:43:55
So everything's closed like it is right now, and we found out 24 hours before we supposed to get married? And we didn't find out from anyone but my dad, who looked it up, and was like, just let you know your place you're supposed to get married at. It might be burning, and we can't go there. So I was like, Cool, great. What am I supposed to do? So in 24 hours, we had to completely re plan the whole entire wedding, which we did, and pivot entirely to get married. And then it ended up being the most beautiful thing ever. Where

Matt Sodnicar 2:44:32
did you re pivot to? We

SJ Lawyer 2:44:33
went to, yeah, re pivot. We went up to Gateway natural area, which is upper Canyon, because you could still go up there. So John and I went up there to look at it. Someone suggested, hey, actually, the bride that we met at her wedding we met at she was like, Hey, why don't you go up to Siemens reservoir? And I was like, I've never been up there. So we went up there, and the reservoir is ugly, like there's this huge cement wall. There's just this. I was like, this is not this is not. Me, this is not us. This is not going to work. And I was set on an outdoor wedding because I just, I love Colorado, I love nature, I just love being outside. I'm like, that's where I need to get married. And so as we're walking back, it was the most beautiful scenery of here's the mountain, here's the water, here's the river, here's all these beautiful colors popping. There was all these huge bushes down by the water that were just yellow and gorgeous. And I stopped in the bridge and was like, that's it. We're getting married on the water, like, right there next to the water. Like, that's what we're doing it. So we did, pivoted, and then canceled our food reservations up in Estes Park and just got a taco truck, which is the taco stop. We just had them give us whole bunch of food catered that at our own house. We have all the catering stuff. Yeah, catering business. So my family picked that up, checked my parents house, set up tables, set the table with decorations. I told them to use that I just randomly had, and we made it work. It was great. But the best part was at our ceremony at the very end, my brother in law, now ex brother in law, that's kind of awkward, but is what it is. But he I gave him a fanny pack that said party on it, because we like to party. And I was like, this is your one task, as my brother in law is at the very end of my vows, I need you to whip around the fanny pack to show it, and then I need you to unzip it and then pull out a donut. So he did. He took my instructions. Did it? The awkward part was that morning I was calling him in my closet with my credit card, and I was like, Hey, brother in law, I need you to stop at this place and get this donut. Yeah, here's my credit card information. Use this. And John walks in on me talking on the phone on our wedding day in the closet, hiding. And he was like, What is going on? I'm like, nothing. Don't worry about it. Just leave me alone. I'm just wedding day stuff. So that was really weird. And then at the wedding, then he whips around the the fanny pack, opens it up, and I finished my vows. And then I was like, John, not only will you share this life with me? And then I pause, and I take the donut. And I was like, but will you share this donut with me? Because we shared the donut on the floor. So he said, of course, crying. And he was like, come on. So his vows were, I concur? Kidding. He actually said things. But he did say, I concur,

Matt Sodnicar 2:47:44
I think the donut beats the hot tub. I know in terms of surprises, it's

SJ Lawyer 2:47:48
pretty great. That's really cool. Now our love grows through corn dogs. Now the corn dog queen, Well, cheers to the no more lobster dogs, though, that's for sure. Now that you're in charge. No, I'm in charge. They do not get to make it back on the on the video, uh,

Matt Sodnicar 2:48:08
well. SJ, that was everything I hope for.

SJ Lawyer 2:48:11
It's a lot. Thank you. It's a lot of drama, a lot of drama in lodging and all this food that John doesn't get to enjoy, yeah, because he made it, yeah?

Matt Sodnicar 2:48:25
Well, thank you. This has been phenomenal. Yeah, thanks for having me. Been fun. I.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai