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You’re tired.
Not just physically; though yeah, that too.
You’re tired in your bones. In your soul.
Trying to be a steady husband, an intentional dad, a man of God… but deep down, you feel like you’re falling short. Like you’re carrying more than you know how to hold.
Dad Tired is a podcast for men who are ready to stop pretending and start healing.
Not with self-help tips or religious platitudes, but by anchoring their lives in something (and Someone) stronger.
Hosted by Jerrad Lopes, a husband, dad of four, and fellow struggler, this show is a weekly invitation to find rest for your soul, clarity for your calling, and the courage to lead your family well.
Through honest stories, biblical truth, and deep conversations you’ll be reminded:
You’re not alone. You’re not too far gone. And the man you want to be is only found in Jesus.
This isn’t about trying harder.
It’s about coming home.
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Natalie and VE is so excited to be hanging out with you guys today. Um, we don't normally have women on the show, but I always feel honored when we get a woman's perspective. All of us dudes who normally are on this podcast talking to each other, we know that we are not nearly as smart as the women in our lives and that we probably wouldn't be anywhere close to where we need to be and want to be if it weren't for the women in our lives.
So. I'm excited. I receive that. I receive that. I'm gonna say that I feel honored to be here as like a special honored woman guest. If, if normally you're having dudes like man, of all the women you get, you picked us. Wow. Well, thank you. You do. Yeah. I mean, we've been friends for a while and uh, just kind of partners from ministry perspective.
I just love your guys' hearts and what you're doing to get the word in people's hearts and minds and, uh, quite literally on their arms and, you know, the tattoos and stickers and, but before I, we jump into all that fun stuff, you know, right before we hit record, we were talking about what life as a parent, and I think there how many?
5, 4, 9, 10, 11, 12. We've got 12 kids I think represented between the three of us all under, you know, 19 and under. And so. Right before we hit record, we just prayed and asked beyond all of the things that we're gonna talk about today, ministry and all this, that we just really want our kids to know Jesus.
And then we hit record. And Natalie, you've already got tears in your eyes, so I'd love to like, just let what, uh, yeah, let's just dive in right away. Like what, what nerve did that prick, you know, like what emotions did that hit as we're talking about God saving our kids? Yeah. I mean, I think that's so much of my heart for all people, but the people that I love that are.
My people, my little people, you know, my burgeoning big people. So I'm the old person in the room with the 19-year-old, but I also have an elementary age son, and I kind of have the gamut there. And just kind of having that perspective of what does it look like when one of your kids launches and the amount of faith that it takes.
I think to, I mean, I think we're always. As parents relinquishing control and saying, he's yours first. Lord, he's yours first. You know, he's yours. Mostly, you know? Yeah. I'm a steward. I'm a, a renter in the house of, of God. I'm not, you know what I mean? I'm not, when it comes to my kids, their primary parent is God himself.
He's all of our fathers. And so if he's their parent, but I'm kind of like a sub parent over here on the earth doing the thing. They're the people that I love the most. And when we, when we pray for their salvation, like I had a really hard conversation with one of my teens just this past weekend. Mm. And I remember saying to her, man, it's your heart that makes me sad right now, and it's your heart that I want.
And I think she kept saying, well, you're just disappointed in me, mom and you. You're mad because I did this and this and whatever. And I said, no, baby. We all sin. We all do things we shouldn't do. But what makes me sad right now is this sense in which it doesn't bother you right now. Yeah. It feels like it's not a big deal to you, and you're kind of.
Blowing it off. And that's what hurts my heart. But it only hurts my heart because, because of Jesus. Because I know that that's a, that's a thing that it's like the number one step and like, how do we, how do we come to know Jesus? How do we have a real relationship with Jesus? We have to have a soft heart.
Yeah. You know, we have to have a heart that's willing to confess and, and come to the, to the Lord and say, I have this huge need. And so when, when my, when I see my kid's heart's hard. Mm-hmm. Somewhat to me, but mainly to Jesus. That's when I'm like, oh. Please God soften their heart. Yeah. Mm-hmm. You know, we had such a similar conversation, Layla and I, um, as we were going to bed the other night and we were talking about one of our kids.
I, now that my kids are getting older, I started this podcast when they were like three and one, and I only had two. Yeah. And now we have four. So I. I was much more free about just talking about that journey. 'cause they were just three in one. Um, yeah. I didn't think much about it, but now as they're getting older, I try to be more respectful of their privacy and not mm-hmm.
You know, just, I always ask for permission if I'm gonna talk about them, you know, on the, on the show. But, so if I haven't asked permission, I'll, I use vague terms on purpose, you know, just to protect them. Yeah. But one of my children we were talking about, and we were just talking about how they, it seems like in that same way, that kind of hardheartedness and I was telling my wife like.
How does Jesus came for the broken? Like he said, I came for the broken. And you talk about how the Lord loves a contrary heart, and blessed are the meek. Jesus said, you know, all these verses where it's like, how does somebody really experience Jesus without brokenness? And if that's true, I. That you find Jesus in the, in the darkest depths of your soul when you're most broken.
Like, how is amazing grace? Amazing. If you're, if you don't first recognize that you're, you are a wretch, right? Like, yeah, those things all are, are in, in sync. And so then if all those things are true, then you have to think to yourself, I want my kids to find the depths of their soul. I want them to be broken in order to find Jesus.
And that's a hard prayer to pray. 'cause normally I think our intuition is, I just want my kids to be happy and healthy and successful and all this stuff. But it's like, well, no, actually, what I really, really want is for them to fall in love with Jesus. And then I don't know how they actually fall in love with Jesus without first being broken.
And there's just a, and they can't be broken without having. Things that break them. Hard things. Exactly. Exactly. Like things you don't want exactly. Your kid to go through. You're like, you're looking. I'm like, don't do that. Okay. You know? I know. You know what's interesting? I've been talking with Natalie about this and some friends recently.
I didn't have like the typical growing up as far as like making mistakes. I was like the kid who never made mistakes. Mm. Like a rule follower, you just like. Hardcore. Okay. Yeah. Hardcore. My favorite, unfortunately. Were you the unlike other people? The youngest, but like, oh, you were the youngest hardcore achiever.
Hardcore needing the approval of man. Mm. Jesus saved me when I was eight. But I was saying to Natalie just the other day that like, the hard thing about my story is I, uh, my brokenness is actually perceived as good by the world standard. So my brokenness. Is that I need man's approval all the time. Mm-hmm.
I need acceptance from, man, I need applause from man. I have this super high standard for myself where I am always worried about failing or making a mistake or letting someone down. That's like my core belief about myself. And if that's your core belief, if that's the way that you are sinning against the Lord.
Everybody applauds it. They're like, wow, Vera's such a good kid. Wow. Vera, she's our, our best student. She's our best athlete. And I get all the awards and all the accolades and all the straight A's, and it reinforces my sin. Wow. And it's not evident to anybody, not even myself. Until you get a little bit older and you're like, wait a second.
I'm having anxiety right now because I'm afraid of letting people down. That's what's going on. And so I'm 36 now and I'm still warring against, and we're all warring against sin all of the time. Yeah. But for so long, like my brokenness was not evident even to myself because it was celebrated by everyone else.
Yeah. So in some, in some ways, like when you're raising your kids and you see. Their brokenness before you because they lie to you or they steal something from their brother or they're hitting somebody or they're unkind with their words. That's actually like an opportunity to rejoice because you can see it.
Whereas like nobody ever told me I was doing anything wrong, and so I like created this. Unreachable standard for myself. Hmm. And I constantly was worried about letting everybody down and that burden was so heavy. Hmm. It was actually not until I was in high school that I was at Natalie's house one day.
She's 10 years older than me and I was still in high school. She's, you know, this young mom and I went over to her house. I had won the state championship as a freshman in, in pole vaulting in track and field. I did not compete my sophomore year 'cause I had gotten mono and I my, what is it that your spleen gets enlarged?
I think something, one of your body parts. And so they wouldn't let me compete my sophomore year 'cause they didn't want it to rupture. And so I was coming back my junior year going into the state meet and I was paralyzed by fear that I wasn't gonna win again. And I remember Natalie having to say to me like, so what happens if you lose?
What happens? And I'm like. I dunno, it's gonna be terrible, you know? And her just telling me like, God loves you despite all your performance. God loves you. And that was kinda the first time I realized like that what was going on in my head and in my heart was actually wrong. Wow. Can I press in a little bit?
Yeah. Do you struggle with anxiety? Are you, mm-hmm. Would you consider yourself an anxious person? Yes, I would. I don't think I always was that way. I mean, I was always trying to keep everybody happy and win and earn things. It wasn't until 2016 and 17 that I really experienced anxiety for the first time.
Hmm. It's actually kind of how we started doing Dwell in 2016. So with sports. I went on to go to college and was an All American in college, and then I continued training after college to try to make the 2016 Olympic team in pole vault. And in 2016 I did not make the Olympic team and I had trained my whole life for this one goal.
I. All of a sudden now, there was no goal left. It was done. And even though I know knew all these truths about myself, like I know who I am in the Lord and I know the things down in my heart. It was like there's this. Gaping whole of like, what next? And I spiraled down into anxiety. Like I had never experienced, I couldn't get outta bed.
I was believing extremely toxic lies in my head. Like, I would wake up at two in the morning and be afraid of my own thoughts. Like, like I'd wake up and be like, no, not again. I'm awake. No. Wow. I mean, before then when, when I was an athlete, I used to write scripture on my wrist all the time in Sharpie marker, and I would memorize scripture while I was competing.
But during that, that year after sports was over, I memorized so much of the word because it truly was my lifeline. Yeah. I was like, in such a bad way. I would wake up in the morning and I would roll over my scripture, like the Bible would already be open and I would just read and read and read and read.
I didn't have a job yet. I didn't know what was next. And so I, I just read scripture all day and that's kind of how my love for the word really. And it's what you were just saying, like it came out of this deep, dark depth of like the bottom hardest part of. My existence, like the scariest place I've ever been is where I found Jesus to be.
My everything. Yeah. And the word to be my everything. Yeah. We talk about this a lot, but like that is the blessing. You know, in Matthew five, blessed are those who mourn and he just goes on and on. Like we said before, blessed are the meek, but it's like how many times we throw around the word God has blessed me.
That's oftentimes in, in reference to like. You know, we got a house, or I got this thing, or my kids are healthy, or they got on the team. We're so blessed. God's been good to us. And maybe that is true, like that, that certainly can be true. But I think the, the deepest blessings, as Jesus said, would be like blessed are those who are mourning 'cause of what you're describing.
Like, I found Jesus in the darkest parts of my life and that was the blessing, you know. Those are the hardest things to pray for. Like if that's true, I don't really wanna pray God to bless me, you know? Yeah, it's true. It's true. It's like I actually, I long for the closeness. I felt during those darkest times.
Yeah. Isn't that weird? I long for that. I mean, weird in sense in the worldly sense. Weird. Like that makes sense in the kingdom, but weird. Like I kinda long to be desperate again. Mm-hmm. You know, that's kind of, that's a crazy, that only makes sense in the king that's upset. It only makes sense. Yes. Yeah, that's so true.
Yeah. Well I appreciate you sharing that. The reason I asked about the anxiousness, 'cause I imagine if you kind of build the life of where you need to control everything. That would cause anxiety. 'cause if I don't have, which none of us really do have control of anything, but when you start to sit, like something that you felt like you had control of starts to slip through your fingers, I imagine that would cause anxiety.
I don't know why I do this sometimes, but I was looking at something on Amazon and my own book popped up. This was like an hour ago. My own book popped up as like an algorithm, you know? So, yeah, like you should buy this. You might like this guy. It's like, I have too many copies. Give them to my mom. So if my own book popped up, I click it and I.
This is just me being honest. I see the reviews, so I decide I'm gonna look at these, which is always a bad decision. So I click that. And you guys are, you released a book or you're about to release a book, right? We're about to, yeah. Your first one? May 14th. Maybe May 14th. Holy cow. Don't look at the reviews.
Good advice. Good advice. No. 'cause they're, could be a bunch of good ones, you know? And, um, but my mind in all its sinful ways, just wants to, and that people pleaser side of me just wants to go to, well, what are the critics saying? Critics sounds like I, you know, I don't have, I'm not popular enough to have like big critics, but there's some critical people on there, and so I read those and man, it can just really take me to a weird spot mentally, a dark spot mentally, and I just find myself so quickly trying to build my identity on what other people are saying.
Quite literally before minutes before we hit record on here, before you guys jumped on, I was just sitting at this desk praying. Repenting like, God, why am I giving some person that I don't even know and that doesn't know me? The power to identify who I am. When you have said who I am. Why would I, in a million years, let that voice be louder than yours?
And I'm so sorry that I have today. Um, I'm just trying to gospel myself and get my heart right with Jesus again. Yeah. Anyway, I wanna hear you guys' perspective. 'cause I know you talked about how like you were writing scripture on your arm and then I know that turned into just the first letters of the verse, and that's kind of how Dwell started.
Mm-hmm. And just in memorizing scripture. Yeah. But maybe Natalie, like how has. Memorizing scripture changed thinking for you. Mm-hmm. And like, what are you guys trying to do with this ministry? Well, I would say even just speaking into what you're talking about, Jared, about, you know, how am I defining myself when something hard happens in my life, when I receive criticism, what are the things that I'm listening to?
Am I listening to, am I trying to sort of justify myself? Am I trying to maybe combat that? Other story, am I believing those things or am I believing what God says about me? Yeah. Right. And so, so often what I do with scripture memory and what we, we really try to do so often with dwell is find verses and I mean, the Bible is.
Is every verse is beautiful and important, but specifically we, when we plan out our year, we sit down and we think about what are the things that we want people to be dwelling on? Things that are true about who our God is, his character, things that are true about who we are in Christ and what he says about us.
Things that to encourage us in the way that we treat other people, those kinds of things. So like I think especially those identity questions for me are verses that I go back to time and time again where it's like I need to know that I'm love. I need to know that it's not my performance that God judges me on.
I need to know that my, that my salvation is secure in Christ. Yeah. And so there are verses that just in my heart, I will wake up in the middle of the night. In fact, recently I woke up in the middle of the night and I literally didn't sleep the entire night. And it was the worst. It was the worst. And I don't know, it was like two in the morning probably where I had this realization.
I'm like, I'm not gonna sleep. Like I, I know that I'm not gonna sleep at this point and I'm actually like a super sleeper. That is my, oh jeez. Skill in the world. Like I don't, don't wanna worry about that. My husband hates me 'cause he wakes up early and he is like, why are you snoring? But I couldn't sleep the whole night long and I had this really big thing the next day and I just felt in my soul, this sense of like, what am I gonna believe?
Hmm. What is the narrative that I'm gonna tell myself? And so what did I tell myself? Rejoice in the Lord. Always. Always. I will say it again. Rejoice. Let your gentleness be evident to all the Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition with Thanksgiving. Present your request to God.
This is the verse that kept hitting me. And the peace of God, which guards your hearts and your minds. Which transcends all understanding. We'll guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Like that was the message that I needed to hear, that it's not about whether or not I get rest tonight. It's not about whether or not I have the strength or the energy, or I'm gonna wake up and I'm gonna have giant bags under my eyes.
Like, who cares? Yeah. Who even cares if the Lord is near and if he hears my anxious cry in the middle of the night and he gives me his peace, that transcends all understanding and guards my heart and my mind. Then I have everything. Mm-hmm. And so it's not just like, you know, I memorize these verses and I know the Bible and look at me.
I'm, you know, Bible scholar. It's actually for me first. Yeah. Like anytime we memorize a verse, every verse we teach through and we talk through on our podcast or every. Verse in the book that we just wrote, like, the goal here isn't that you would learn something from me or from Vera. The goal here isn't that somehow you would think that we're really smart or great or whatever.
That's the goal. I'm sure with your book. It's not about Jared Lopez. Yeah. It's about God and who he is and helping people see him for who he is in his glory. And so it's like if I can remove myself out of the equation as being somehow significant, like. Like Jesus says, even the rocks are gonna cry out.
That's right. So if I can see myself rightly, then I can have peace and joy and not be anxious. I mean, honestly for me, that is what is so beautiful about Dwell is that the very thing that I'm doing, you know, professionally, that's providing money for my family is the very thing that my soul desperately needs.
And it is such. A beautiful joy to be the first person that God is always ministering to. Yeah. In the verses we're memorizing. Yeah, I relate to that totally. Hey guys, hope you're enjoying today's episode. Just wanna take a quick minute to remind you that we have a brand new children's book coming out. If you are looking for very practical ways to point your kids to Jesus.
This is a great book for you as a dad to read to your kids. Oftentimes, our kids think of us as the hero of the family, but we know that we are not really a hero. We fall short of our own standards and God's standards, and our kids need someone better to look up to. And so as the dad, we want to point their little eyes and ears and hearts back to Jesus.
And that's what this book does. You can pick up a copy wherever books are sold. Amazon offers a lowest price guarantee. So if you pre-order now. Whatever the lowest price is between now and the time it's released, you will get that lowest price anyway. It's my goal that you'll get this book and read it to your kids, and that they will be pointed back to Jesus.
My daddy's hero is the name of it. You can pick it up wherever books are sold. Let's jump back into today's episode. I like the way you said that because I think there's sometimes. We get in this, if Christianity, the Christian culture, I love it. I love God's church. I love God's people. But sometimes we're weird, like as a people, like a Christian culture is weird.
We are, and uh, there's just some weird things we do and some of the things that like you can kind of create this subculture and we just talk about like. These disciplines and they start to feel like unnecessary disciplines, but you just do them to be a quote unquote good Christian. And one of those could be memorizing scripture.
It's like, I know I should, I know I should read my Bible more and memorize scripture. And what I think I miss, and sometimes I think we miss as a, as a church, is tying that dot of like, this isn't just so I can be a quote unquote good Christian. This is like, as Jesus said, would say the bread of life. Like there's no way I can be healthy as a man or a woman if I'm not meditating on the word of God because.
That reviewer wants to identify me. That boss wants to identify me, my accomplish wants to wanna identify me. And so those accomplishments, and so you're like, I literally, I'm either going to eat what the world provides for me, which will kill my soul, or I will eat as Jesus said, the bread of life, the word of God that will sustain me.
And that is my only chance of being healthy and thriving as a man. Like I, it's not just I'm trying to be a good Christian, like I need this. Otherwise, my brain is gonna go to weird places. My heart is gonna go to weird places, and that will most definitely impact me as a husband, as a dad, as a man. So I just, we, we have to have it.
Like, we have to have the word of God, uh, otherwise we're just dying. It's true. It's your food for your soul every day. And, and I kind of joke sometimes because we'll pick verses for the whole year and I'll be like, oh, that one. Hmm. Which is so silly, you know? But we all kind of have our favorite verses and it's so interesting the number of times where I have memorized a verse in a season, I didn't really need it.
'cause we get that feedback. Well, we get plenty of critiques. I'm sure. I'm sure on the innerwebs. Yeah. But people will be like, this verse doesn't apply to me. And I'm like, it all applies to you. And if you don't think it does today, you just wait three years from now when you're laying awake in bed worried about this thing, God's word will come back to you.
Yeah. And one of those verses for me, it was um, Psalm 1 16, 7. And I remember when we picked it, I was like this one. And okay. I mean, it says, return to your rest my soul for the Lord has been good to you. Wow. Hmm. And I say, so I need that right now. That applies to me, like right now I need that. Yes, it does.
I don't know what made, it just made my soul feel a little bit more rested, even as you said it. Yes. And it has become like. It's one of my cornerstone things I say to myself, return to your rest. My soul for the Lord has been good to you. When I feel worked up and I feel overwhelmed, or my kid can't sleep, like that's the verse I say to my children When I lay in bed with them, when they can't sleep in the middle of the night, we like, we coach our soul to return to its rest 'cause God is good to us.
That's so good. So I just feel like it is true what it says about itself, it will not return void. Yeah. It always feeds us. Yeah. It really has never been about, for all the things that I try to achieve, this is the one thing that I never have done it because I wanted to win something. It's because it, I will die.
Like you said, I will die without it. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I was walking with my son and I was asking him, he had a situation with some of the neighborhood boys and I was asking him like, what do you think Jesus would've done in that situation? He is like, I don't know. The Bible doesn't talk about it. I'm like, that's true.
Like the Bible doesn't talk about what's happening 2024 on our little street. But I said, but we do get to know the reputation of God and we, we get to see some of the ways that he would have responded in similar situations. And I think this is, again, going back to like those, tying the dots. It's not just a, this feels good, it's the right thing to do, but it's like if we don't know who God is and what his reputation is like, then we we're susceptible to make up who we want him to be in our head.
Mm-hmm. Oh yeah. And all of us do that. I don't care how old churched or unchurched you are, like who we want God to be often will look like us. And so this is too, like, I think there's a huge part of it. It's like. My brain just goes to places. I want God to be like who I like and not like, who I don't like.
And he justifies the things that I justify and all those things. But it's like, no, it's, you know, second Timothy, like, I, I need the word of God to correct me and rebuke me and train me for righteousness because, uh, otherwise I'm making up all the things that I wanna make up in my own head. I'm curious, like, what do you guys', thoughts are the dwell has been so helpful for our family.
I, my kids have so many tattoos all the time, just tatted up. Um, they love it. But have you guys thought about much about just our inability as a people in 2024 to like sit and meditate? Like how hard of a skill that is? We grew up in a generation where you would still have to be on a car ride and there was no technology.
You just have to look out the window, you know? And like, that was just it. You know, you just, you, you look out the signs and you try to play an alphabet game or something, like you just, it's quiet. And so I have that part of me that, that has nostalgia. I kinda remember what it was like to just have moments of quiet.
It's something we're teaching, just like learning to sit in silence. But have you guys thought about like even the, the challenge of literally sitting and meditating and how hard that is in our day and age? It's super difficult. I use car time for it myself. Don't put on a radio. The radio or Spotify, or, I am not a podcast listener.
I appreciate that for the most part. Thank you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. We have our own podcast that she doesn't listen to unless she's on it. Listen, no, I do. I will occasionally, like if my husband sends something, but he used to send me podcasts, all the, he is the most podcast listener. Wow. And so he would send me PI like, oh, you gotta listen to this.
Oh, you gotta listen. I'm like, I just need the synopsis because I can't anymore. Everything we do in our society is so loud all the time. Yeah. That when I get into the car and I'm by myself, I just am in the car. It's like I don't, I just am like, it's, I can hear the fan blowing on me. Yeah. And I think that's my, my best time to take an inventory of what am I actually feeling?
Why am I tense or why am I sad or whatever. And just giving myself the permission to like unload that before the Lord. And be like, whoa, I didn't even realize all day I was feeling this way, but now I am taking in inventory and I'm saying that, and I do it also when I'm doing the dishes. That's kind of like when the kiddos are done eating, they'll go down and play basketball in our basement or.
Whatever. And that like when I'm at the kitchen sink, that's what I'm doing. Yeah. It's just like unloading my thoughts. 'cause you know, I've got three little boys under the age of six and so those quiet meditative moments are very few and far between that are like scheduled. And so I just try to do my best to take the spaces where I can.
Steal those moments of meditation. I think we are afraid of those moments personally because of the, the silence brings up the stuff that you were talking like. Again, this goes back to, you gotta think about that, that it goes back to memorizing the scripture because our thoughts are loud when it's quiet.
And I think most of us don't wanna deal with the loud stuff in our souls. Mm-hmm. And so it's easier to drown things out. I would rather put on a podcast or turn on the radio, or turn on the TV or do something, because if I'm quiet for a minute, Jesus might try to bring some stuff up that I'm Notre ready to deal with.
And again, it goes back to knowing his reputation and knowing his word. Yeah. To be able to sit in those quiet moments. That's so true. Well, and I think too, Jared, there's a verse, is it Luke 6 45 that says, the good man brings good things out of the good, stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart and out of the mouth.
The heart speaks basically like out of the overflow. Yeah. Of your heart is what you're, what you're gonna say, or how you're gonna act. And I think that when we are in those quiet moments, we a lot of times discover what's actually in our hearts. Yeah. And I think that if there are good things that we're storing up in our hearts, like God's word, those are the things that come to us and minister to us.
Whereas if we're the things we're storing up in our hearts, the things we're putting in there is like the latest show on Netflix. Not that that's bad, but that's, if that's the culmination in the only thing, or the podcasts or whatever, like books that you're reading, conversations that you have with people, if those are the only words that you're hearing.
Not that they're necessarily bad, but if you're not intentionally putting good things in, it seems ridiculous that we would expect that good things would come out. Totally. Mm-hmm. Totally. You know what I'm saying? And I just think, gosh, when I'm with myself in my thoughts and I'm processing through the things that are in my heart that are actually terrible, you know, that hatred or or anger or whatever, when I've got those things going on.
It gives me the ability, scripture gives me the ability when it's in there to sort of filter those thoughts through what's actually true. That's really good. Mm-hmm. I was, I put all the kids, but nighttime is just like, I don't know what it is with little ones, but nighttime is just like, I think I lose my salvation like five times a week at nighttime.
Like bedtime? Same. Same. Yeah. It's just nightly at about 6 45. It's so hard. What is it like they just turn into just weirdos crazy. Terrorists at night, they're just crazy. Mm-hmm. Anyway, they could go do a whole podcast episode on nighttime, but we finally put the kids to bed and I laid down and it was quiet and my ears were literally ringing, you know, like after a concert or something, like when it, when it gets quiet.
Yeah. I'm like, I wasn't even listening to anything other than the noise of our household that my ears are just like ringing. Like, yes, silence is just so hard to come by, but I've been trying to like really sit in those. I travel a lot, we do a lot of speaking stuff for dad's tired and I'll just, at the airport, I'll just try to not pull out my phone, sit in the, the waiting room at the gate or at the gate, whatever.
And then even on the plane, I'll just try to sit there 'cause I just so few times as parents that you can just sit in silence and I just really want to like, I'm trying to step in with boldness to that silence, letting my heart reveal what's in there. Natalie, as you said, like, okay, what revealed? Like show me my heart.
Oh Lord, are there any wicked ways in me? Am I storing up? Things in me that are not pleasing to you, that would not bring you joy or glory, but then. Knowing God's reputation, that it's always for hi. It's always for my good and for his glory, right? Mm-hmm. If he's gonna bring that up, it's not, he's not a angry father.
He already, I have the gospel myself constantly. He poured out his wrath on Jesus, and he gets to pour out his graces on me. And so if he's bringing up something in my heart, this is for my good and for his glory. And so just trying to sit in that. So I'd encourage every listener for all you guys listening right now.
Hopefully this podcast has been helpful for you and this episode has been helpful for you, pointed you back to Jesus, but also like when it's done here in a minute, like just turn it off and just sit quietly for a minute if you can, you know, even just take like five minutes and just ask Lord. God, is there anything in me that offends you?
Is there anything in me that is not of you and meditate on who you know God to be and His word. And, um, just see what He does. We've kind of danced around it. I don't think we've been explicit, but like for the listeners who are like, what is Dwell? What are you guys talking about? You know, we've talked about it on the show many times, but for somebody that may not be familiar, just tell us like what it is exactly that you guys do.
And then maybe just we'll end our time by telling us about your new book that you guys have coming up. I'll tell you about the what we do at Dwell Sweet and Natalie. You can tell 'em about the book, how about that? Okay, so at Dwell, we help people memorize one Bible verse every month. And we do one because we really actually believe that there's enough power in one verse to completely transform your life.
And so we intentionally do one verse a month because we want to really get to know the verse and the truth of it, and the power of it. And so we dive into that verse all month long. We have a weekly podcast where we talk about the context and the application of the verse. We do a weekly devotional where we, again, just talk about what does this actually mean practically for us as Christians.
But there is a, that's like all free. You can find it all online, but then we do a monthly membership where you can get a little kit in the mail. This is the tattoos. Jared was talking about his kids with their sleeves of tattoos. But you can get the, the kit and it comes with a devotional card, like a print you can put up in your home and a key chain for, or key tag for your key chain.
And then you can choose either tattoos or stickers to memorize the verse. And you might be thinking like, is it just like the verse? And no, it's actually the first letter of every word in the verse. And we create like a really cool design. So if the verse is about God's peace, it might be a dove, is the shape of the tattoo with the first letter in it.
So every time you see the design, you're challenged to recall the, what the letters represent, and you slowly memorize the verse. And the beautiful thing is that most of us are visual learners. We're not auditory learners. And so we are really intentional about how we design the verse so that when you see it, you remember, oh yeah, the the bird one is about God's peace.
And that's what this verse is. So that's what we do every month, all month long. And I'll just speak as like somebody who uses in the family two things. One, as a dad, it really is such an easy way to lead your family to Jesus. Like it takes very little time, energy, intentionality to, uh, in this particular area, to like point your kids to Jesus.
You literally just get the kit in the mount mail, you put the tats on yourself and on the kids. And what's fascinating. Is how quickly you can memorize that verse with just those first letters. It really, like even my three-year-old, five-year-old, how quickly they can spout out verses back. It's really incredible.
But I mean, just as a, if you're dad listening, you're like, I should probably be more intentional about pointing my family to Jesus. This is, it's such an easy way to do it. And it, again, I'm not sure what's more important than getting the word of God on in your heart and in their heart and on their lips.
So, and they'll challenge you with the, the little, little kids. My kids are like, mommy, can you put my tattoo on? And you're like, yeah, we forgot to do that. Let's do it. Like I, I memorized all of Psalm 23 because of my 3-year-old. Wow. He wanted it, he kept pulling out our, our Psalm 23 pack and wanting to go through the verses, and I had never memorized it.
And now I know it because he knows it and so does my other son and my husband. We all memorized it because of our three-year-old. That's incredible. That's really cool. Natalie, tell us about the book. It's really cool. Okay. I just also, I just wanna say one thing that I think is really special, just hearing you guys talk about it, is the communal aspect of it.
Mm-hmm. That it gives you sort of a focal point that you're, you're all talking about the same thing. It's kinda like when you read a Bible story before bed and you have that conversation, it's like a month long conversation where that verse just keeps coming back and back and back. Whatever verse it is that you're memorizing, it's, it's really, I don't know, I think it's simple.
Makes sense. And last thing. One more thing is that people, I don't know if this has ever happened to you, Jared, but people out in the world will ask you about your tattoo. Yep. Yep. They're like, Hey, what's your tattoo? You're like at the grocery store and you're like, let me tell you about Jesus. Yeah. He must become greater.
I must become less, or whatever the verse is. And they're intrigued by it. And so if you're like a little bit anti tattoo, I'm gonna challenge you. You're gonna love it because it's the easiest way to share your faith. Totally. They, I notice they do it a lot with my kids. You know, they're always like, what'd your tattoo say?
You know, and they have to say it and they said, so, yeah, they seem to be less bold of me. I'm probably more angry looking than my kids, so they don't ask me. Uh, yeah, that awesome. What's the book you. Again, Jared, we just are trying to help people memorize Bible verses and so we picked 11 verses specifically to help people overcome negative thinking.
So like, what is it that you're struggling with? Are you struggling with, you know, just feeling down that one of the verses is from Psalm 42, I think it's verse five, and it says, why are you downcast my soul? Why so disturbed within me, put your hope in God for I will yet again praise him, my savior, and my God.
Like that verse. To me is such a great verse for when I'm like, why am I bummed out right now? It feels like everything's going great, and yet why is my soul downcast? And it, it gives me the words to speak to my soul and say, put your hope in God. He's got this under control and so the goal of the book isn't.
That you think the book is awesome, it's that we've given you all these verse designs so that you would actually memorize all of these different verses for every situation. And it sort of is almost like a resource tool where it's like you could just go to any of those chapters and being like, ah, I'm feeling anxious.
Do they have a verse about anxiety? I'm feeling kind of unlovable. Is there a verse about that? And so each chapter is sort of a standalone little. Compartmentalized idea. And then at the end of every chapter, there are questions to kind of help you be a little bit introspective and think about like, how does this verse really apply to me?
Or where am I struggling with these things, or what things make me anxious and why? And, and how can the Lord speak into that, or, you know, whatever. Yeah. So. I really enjoyed the project of working on it. Again, I was very ministered to by it. I got to learn 11 new verses, each of which I think is just a really beautiful picture of who God is and, and what he has for us in His word.
I love. Can you say that verse again slowly and as a listener, I want you just to listen to it. Yeah, I can. Why are you downcast on my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God. For I will yet again. Praise him, my savior and my God. It's Psalm 42, 5. I think five. It's five. Yeah. As you, as a listener, as you listen to that, just imagine like, I mean, that's one example, but I mean, I imagine there are a ton of guys listening and moms listening, and you feel that, like my soul does feel down right now, and then just to.
Rebut against your own soul and your own heart, which is prone to wander against the Lord, to just rebut that with the word of God. It's like mm-hmm. This is what I mean by the, the bread of life, the living water that is going to sustain you. And so again, I even for you, like practically right now as a listener, I just want you to tie that like very practically, it's not just, we're not just trying to be quote unquote good Christians, but.
Your soul needs the word of God. And even as I heard Natalie say the first time as she was describing the book, I was like, dude, my soul needs to hear that and be reminded of that constantly. And this is why we meditate on the word of God. This is why we put the scripture in our hearts and on our lips and on our kids' hearts.
And imagine all the things that our kids are gonna be feeling today, this year, this week, as they're going, growing up to all the thoughts that they'll have in their selves and that the enemy would want to throw in their minds and on their hearts. And that we would bury that treasure of God's word deep into their hearts to start shaping their minds and their hearts early.
It's just so necessary. So anyway, I'm so thankful for what you guys are doing. Truly, it's helped our family. I know it's helped a lot of our listeners. I'm thankful for you as just sisters to come on and share your own journeys of being moms and wives and women trying to chase after Jesus. This conversation's truly been really encouraging to me, so thank you.
Awesome. So Joy. Thanks Jared. Hey Jared. Also for your listeners, we're gonna create a dwell differently.com/dad tired page, and we will give some resources, some downloadable things, amazing for your people if they're just, we do a lot of like screensavers with some of our. First designs, things like that, that they can have for free.
Just if they wanna get started, memorizing the word and in in a really simple, easy way. That's super kind. Thank you for doing that. That's awesome. Yeah. Thank you.