Weekly. Periodically. Whenever it's convenient.
Three dudes x One Room = Unpredictable Content.
0:00:00
Welcome to the Garage Viewers.
0:00:02
It is Tuesday, May 9th. And this is season 3, episode 5 of the Garage Viewers podcast.
0:00:11
Historically our peak. Yes, Queen.
0:00:14
Oh, this is when we peaked.
0:00:15
I think both seasons, episode 5 is peak.
0:00:17
So I guess we're going home next week then. Well then we really should have rethought who our guest was tonight. Is it a guess or does it belong to Zero?
0:00:34
Yeah, that's the point.
0:00:35
We didn't think. So, Season 3, Episode 5, officially welcoming the newest member of the team. He did so well on the Episode 4 in the studio last week. Talking about his wood. Talking about his wood, teaching us some things. We decided to welcome back Filthy Phil. So here he is. Phil, what's up?
0:00:59
Electric. You sound a little bit more excited.
0:01:03
Thanks for that ticket. He's going to be our official producer so he's going to be our Jamie.
0:01:07
Okay, so you guys say that and then... How do you not know? No, but all that means is like he's gonna look things up yeah like a little bit more responsibility
0:01:16
no when I see something he's gonna end up fact-checking it nine times out of ten I'm gonna prove it wrong
0:01:20
you can't full-on be just a host right away yeah my
0:01:25
my phone's ringing I was a call-in guest first he was a guest last week that was his audition as producer
0:01:32
oh right okay yeah I mean and also
0:01:35
can we turn the air conditioner back on I mean I'm sweating turn it back on guys it's gonna be a little bit of humming and we'll just take into note if we get anyone pissed off. I don't care. I'm turning it back on. I think Trav should get back up and turn it back on. Yeah, I would. There's just so much going on right now in my life. That would be a lot for me. Alright, well
0:01:56
if we lose listeners because of this... I don't really... Oh, I hear the air conditioner.
0:02:01
It's not bad. It's a little white noise. If I listened to this before bed, that would help me.
0:02:07
Because Nick's a professional podcaster.
0:02:10
If people listen to this podcast and they're like, that will help them.
0:02:13
That's a good point. What do you guys listen to when you go to sleep?
0:02:17
Literally the sound of my woman's tongue.
0:02:20
My fingers swiping on Tinder.
0:02:23
I do have a fan. Does that count as listening to something?
0:02:26
Yeah.
0:02:26
Yeah, I listen to The Fan on volume 74.
0:02:29
Last night I did fall asleep watching The Friends.
0:02:31
The Friends? Or watching Friends, whatever.
0:02:34
How many times have you seen Friends throughout the year? Oh boy. Like every episode?
0:02:39
Because I still feel like there's some- like I've watched all of them a lot. I would say at least six.
0:02:43
No! Yes!
0:02:44
Dude, it's pretty unreal.
0:02:45
You're telling me there's no episode you haven't watched less than four times
0:02:49
one hundred percent
0:02:50
that's fucked up that's and i i don't i don't want to show you all right so i don't know if you have a good fucking great but i was just start off so i love it uh... for my temperature yeah we were thinking that he was a little less than four years and a lot of names you know you're getting a now that i've broken the system that you can get out of here
0:03:14
uh... at this point i think
0:03:16
I think enough of those have slipped through.
0:03:23
Speaking of sweating, this is a perfect transition into our first topic.
0:03:27
Because Travs was sweating bullets yesterday. I'm not surprised, but Travs and I probably just sweat constantly. No, I do run hot. When the temperature is above 65 degrees. That's where I'm cool at, but if I'm above 72, I'm sweating. I can handle 70, 71. Second that fucker hits 72, pants are coming off. Assuming I'm wearing shorts.
0:03:53
Or not within 500 yards of a school. So we went to the track yesterday to try to do this challenge, which Jim was supposed to partake in. I got busy. Jim was being all coy about whether or not he would show up. We thought maybe he would. So we tracked his location.
0:04:12
He comes to.8 miles away and then stops. Before we keep going, because I just have another segment we can add, should you share your location or not? That will be a poll question.
0:04:23
That's actually a good poll.
0:04:24
That's actually a rule of the boys club. You have to share your location. Yeah, but one person in the boys club does not need to sit in the room with the other
0:04:31
two. No, Luke is like on the quasi, on the fence. Like for some people, I think they see it. Other people, I don't see Luke's location.
0:04:38
I think we should talk about it though. What's the norm on a friend group? And then we'll ask a poll.
0:04:42
And then what's the norm on your significant other?
0:04:44
Oh yeah, that's good. Okay, but keep going with the track.
0:04:47
We'll get to it later.
0:04:48
Well, now I've got to create this poll, so you guys talk about it.
0:04:51
So, anyways, we went to the track yesterday, and mind you, Jim lives, I would say, 15 minute drive away from the track. We all get to the track, because as you remember from last week, we were going to run a 100 and time ourselves. We made wagers on how we would do. I even offered to thread my eyebrows, as long as Wiley paid for it. I would thread my eyebrows if I ran over 15 flat because I was so confident. For those who are on the other end and can't see me, I weigh 274, but I'm built though. I'm built different. I'm built like a brick shithouse. Body built by Bushlight and the gym. It's a good combination of both. So anyways, Jim's 15 minutes away at his house. I'm like, fuck guys, we're at the gym, or we're at the track, he ain't coming. Then Jim's location starts to move closer and closer
0:05:42
and close we jim did you know that this is yes
0:05:45
absolutely yeah you knew we were seeing your look all know
0:05:49
you fuck you know you're looking at my look at how I know that you're looking
0:05:53
I don't know the reason you were going that close to us no I went to a friend's house for dinner Jim it just happens to be point eight miles. Jim, he lives right out to the, he drove point seven miles away from us. Wow. He lives off the back hill of senior. He drove from fifteen minutes away at his house to one minute away from the track. And we're like, oh my god, he's coming, he's coming, he's coming. And then his location just fucking planted there. Yep. Turns out he was eating fat food. Well, he could have been running. I had lettuce on my burger. He could have been running with us. And all you had to run was a hundred, I mean. Although
0:06:24
it was a lot longer than I thought it would be. When you get out there, you're like, oh wow, this is crazy.
0:06:28
Oh, 100 meters is pretty fucking far.
0:06:30
Yeah.
0:06:31
Yeah.
0:06:32
Hold on, poll question.
0:06:33
How should I word this?
0:06:34
You should word it as, how gay is Travis?
0:06:35
With your closest friends, do you share location? Or would you share location?
0:06:40
Okay, continue.
0:06:41
Do slash would you share location?
0:06:44
Not would as in would, but do.
0:06:45
He's the, yeah, he's the would worker.
0:06:48
So anyways, I had set Vegas lines on everybody. Pretty good lines, honestly. Yeah, I mean, I was close-ish on mine. I was the farthest away, my farthest delta. But now, knowing what I know after doing the track day, the line I have for Jim is way too aggressive.
0:07:07
What did you say?
0:07:08
I'll have to pull it back up.
0:07:09
20.72.
0:07:10
Oh, absolutely. I could have told you that.
0:07:13
You would have thought you were better or worse?
0:07:14
No, way worse.
0:07:15
I was putting my own line at like 30 if I decided to actually do this. I had Jim at 20.72. I had me at 14.89. I had our buddy OB Nug at 13.97. Mr. Nick, 13.64. And Filty Phil at 2.88.
0:07:33
What actually came in...
0:07:34
12.88. 12.88.
0:07:36
I'm sorry, 12.88.
0:07:37
That's what you set his line at yeah, wow that was a good what actually came in is Phil at 12 flat Wow Athlete Wiley at 13 flat so you know nine tenths of a second faster on Phil Six tenths of a second faster on Wiley. I'm sorry on Nick Obi Nug Was point four seven faster. I put him at 13 970 came out 13 5 I had me at 14 8 9 mostly just because of ego He came in 13.5. I had me at 14.89 mostly just because of ego. My actual line on me was going to be 15 flat. No, that's fair. I came in at 15.6, ran it a second time, was even slower. I had nothing left.
0:08:20
And then in point...
0:08:21
Well, yeah, you put everything you possibly could into that 15.7.
0:08:24
100% I did. I think...
0:08:26
But after the first one, you said, oh, I got more, I got more.
0:08:26
I thought I did have more, and then I realized my legs were fucking jammed. And then in place of Mr. Knappersick, we had Obi Nuggs' girlfriend running, and she was step for step with me for a while. She took off high.
0:08:39
So did you guys all run this at the same time?
0:08:41
Only Obi Nuggs' girlfriend and I ran at the same time. Was she your rabbit? For the first 30, I was ahead of her, but for the first 30 steps we were side by side. I'm like I'm about to lose to a hundred pound girl. You shouldn't talk about girls weight, I'm sorry, but I'm about to lose to a girl who does not like doesn't ever run and I was like I claim to be a former athlete. Then again she was a former athlete, is a former athlete too so yeah. Anyways it was a great day for me. I think you said the average was 14 for all age groups. So it said the average for all people who've ran the 100 is 15 flat. Well, I don't run the fucking 100, so I feel like I was pretty good.
0:09:21
Yeah?
0:09:22
Yeah, honestly, like I said, it felt like a lot longer than 100. I didn't realize how far. And also, it's just weird. It's weird to like all out sprint something. I haven't all out sprinted in a long time.
0:09:32
Were you nervous for a hamstring? Yeah.
0:09:35
Me too.
0:09:36
I thought something was going to pop. I mean, my feet were hitting that ground so hard. I was like, I cannot be running right.
0:09:42
I'm just smacking my feet.
0:09:43
I gotta be honest, Nick, as we all know, on the pod is a physical specimen. And watching him run his warmup, I was like, this kid's slow as fuck. I swear, I told Phil, I'm like, I'm gonna beat Nick.
0:09:56
He did say that, he did say that.
0:09:58
He looks slow, but that's maybe just because he's a great guy.
0:10:00
Are you really supposed to look fast in a warm-up? Just the way he was going, I'm like, this kid ain't got it.
0:10:06
No, I was actually warming up, and then I had to gas it, but I still did not feel good doing that. So CrossFit doesn't help you run the 100 meter?
0:10:16
I'm sure it does, if you know how to run in the first place.
0:10:19
My form is shitty.
0:10:20
I kind of want to do it again in three months.
0:10:24
Could you, what's your time on a 100 meter swim?
0:10:28
I mean, good.
0:10:30
What do you mean?
0:10:31
Like 25?
0:10:32
I don't know.
0:10:33
100 meters, so my fastest ever in 100 yards would be 47, 100 meters would be about 53. Dude, I could smoke you if you were swimming and I was running.
0:10:41
I would wax you. How about you run a 400 and I swim a 100?
0:10:46
That's 53.
0:10:47
Not even close.
0:10:48
53 in my prime. So maybe not even a minute.
0:10:53
I just blasted my arm. You would wipe the floor. I will give you a wet nap if you lick your arm right now. Pass. It's your own dirt. I still don't believe in it. So you're just going to let that sit there and fester on your arm right now? I didn't want to be honest with you but for the most part I missed and I went directly towards Phil. I see some dampness on your arm there. You do not! That's just my glisten and glow from my... Oh, that's your sweat.
0:11:19
Proactive.
0:11:20
Hold on. Question, back to the running.
0:11:22
20 was set for Jim's line?
0:11:24
Yeah.
0:11:25
You fucking high?
0:11:26
I don't know what you might be able to do, because we were talking about it with Nuge. He said as long as you don't start out too hot, you'd probably be close.
0:11:34
Well, if you don't start out hot, and you don't get hot in the middle and you don't end hot.
0:11:40
Dude, when I hit 60...
0:11:42
And that you hit 30.
0:11:43
When I hit 60, 70 meters, I was like, oh fuck.
0:11:47
Is this over yet?
0:11:48
I don't, yeah, I didn't know if I could keep... So is that the same thought you had Saturday night?
0:11:52
What does that mean?
0:11:53
At like 3 o'clock in the morning, is this over yet?
0:11:55
Okay, that's enough. We also afterwards ran a 40. So to put things in perspective, that morning we all worked out. We... Legs. Leg workout. I ran a mile as hard as I could that morning, which wasn't fast. It was 845, but I weighed 274 this morning. Like I'm not, not exactly a trim specimen, but I did a leg workout, ran hard there. I ran 100 as hard as I could twice and then tried to do a 40. I came in like 6'2". It was bad. And I remember running a 40 in middle school and it was 6.2 so either I'm just as slow as I was when I was 12 years old or I just had nothing left in the tank and I'd like to try it again.
0:12:38
It's probably a combo. I think you're out of gas.
0:12:40
That second time you ran the 100, the last 20 meters you were slowing down a lot.
0:12:46
Well you know it's bad when the second time and I thought about this afterwards but the reason I know the second one was bad in terms of being gas is that when I finished, I finished like one meter past 100 and I just collapsed. I'm like, you're supposed to run through it. I was out.
0:13:04
I had nothing left.
0:13:05
Actually, yeah, I was down at the other end and I could tell. I was like, dude, don't slow down in the finish.
0:13:09
Run through it. I gave it everything I had. I might have been faster if I started rolling at that point.
0:13:14
So you want him to run a 400 and he tapped out after like a 180.
0:13:19
A fresh 400.
0:13:20
But you gotta realize I wouldn't go as hard as I did on that first 100 and second 100 if I was trying to 400. But I would set my line at a 400 at a minute 30. That would be hard, dude.
0:13:32
I would probably put mine at like 230.
0:13:34
Well, I'll say this. If you as a friend group out there want to have a good time betting each other's over-under it was actually fun that was so fun we got out there Nugent and oh well sorry OB Nug and his girlfriend didn't actually want to run and then they saw us doing it and they're like all right let's do it yeah
0:13:52
and actually he was in a kind of a piss poor mood he's like I am not running I don't feel like it and then he saw us and he's like that was like me except I actually just didn't show up yeah if you would have been there you would have wanted to.
0:14:03
I wouldn't have been able to function today. That's possible.
0:14:07
And I had a 645 crew call for my video shoot. I don't understand how the time matters. You would have had 12 hours of sleep before you were going to bed right after the run.
0:14:16
Who the fuck does that?
0:14:17
I'm just saying.
0:14:18
I was working until 2 o'clock in the morning.
0:14:21
That was your decision.
0:14:22
It's called running your own business.
0:14:23
Jim, do you sleep at all?
0:14:24
Not a ton.
0:14:26
I actually, I feel like I, I know everyone says this, but like, I took a little cat nap this afternoon, but overall, like I operated just fine all day long today on, what, four hours, four and a half hours?
0:14:41
I don't know.
0:14:42
I think if you got a quality seven hours, like uninterrupted, blackout. I haven't gotten a quality seven hours since I was maybe seven? That's what I'm saying though, I think you'd be amazed at the difference. Your IQ would go from probably 83 up to maybe 93, 94.
0:14:56
Oh, really?
0:14:58
Smooth.
0:15:00
Anyway, the track day was fun, Jim. I would love for you to come to the next one.
0:15:04
We'll do it again.
0:15:06
We should bring a bike for Jim. A bike that's 100 as fast as he can. I already have a bike. One that's not motorized. One that's not made by Harley Davidson.
0:15:14
Well, I'm not interested.
0:15:15
Harley Davidson's a metal bike.
0:15:16
You ever thought about doing a motocross?
0:15:19
No.
0:15:20
Why not?
0:15:21
I don't...
0:15:22
You can get on a 450.
0:15:23
You know, that's like one of the... You don't want to die. I've heard that's a crazy workout. Riding a dirt bike, motocross is crazy.
0:15:30
I was going to say, that's how you can get your workout.
0:15:33
Bro, think about tubing behind a boat. Like, your forearms are fried. Now imagine doing that on a dirt bike.
0:15:39
Yeah.
0:15:40
Yeah, I'm good. Thanks guys. Do your arms get tired when you do your thousand mile runs?
0:15:44
No.
0:15:45
My butt cheeks get a little sore. But is it because you're just so comfortable on the bike?
0:15:49
Yeah. Jim, you know those bikes that have the handlebars way up here?
0:15:52
Mm-hmm. A-Bangers?
0:15:53
Okay, I used to think...
0:15:54
He doesn't know what they're called.
0:15:55
Yeah.
0:15:56
He doesn't know what they're called. Okay.
0:15:58
I wouldn't either. Yeah, make fun of me, dick.
0:16:00
So I was told that that is actually for your back. It's for health reasons. You didn't know that. If you think about it, if your handlebars are below you, you're going to be leaning forward. If your bars are higher, it's not so much about your shoulders, but your back is then straight up and down. Yeah, makes sense. I just thought that people were trying to look cool.
0:16:24
I think, so when you, for... That's part of it too, though.
0:16:27
Most of the time when you see those, those are 16 inch, so that means it's 16 inches above the, what's called like the triple tree, where the forks connect to the bars. 16 inches is what the most common, when you see those apingers, what it is. But like right now I'm at 10s, and I'm going to 14s, just so I...
0:16:46
Try to quantify what 16 inches is, so like 8 of my, okay. Yeah, I got it.
0:16:50
I know what that's like. Mine's like 32. Okay Jim, is there any thing that bikers do that you could point out and you know that guy's like a noob? Like if you see going by, you're like, oh that guy doesn't know what the fuck he's doing.
0:17:05
I think riding probably not so much. No, I think for me, one of those telltale signs is when you see a bike and it's got not so much the stock pipes because like replacing pipes on your bike is like two thousand bucks not necessarily cheap but like the handle grips if it's still like the stock handle grips that tells me you rode that bike off the showroom floor and you've done absolutely nothing to it and you honestly you probably ride
0:17:32
less than like a thousand miles a year. There are people out there though I know from the ladies family business who are all about keeping their bikes completely OEM. So I can see that. I don't, unless they're doing that because like you don't get any like trade-in or resale value really for what you put in your bike. I mean if that's what they're trying to do, fine. Like I
0:17:56
could somewhat understand that, but if you're just not gonna do anything to it. What about like a classic? Yeah, the classic. But they'll
0:18:03
upgrade with the OEM grips just, you know, they'll be new instead of 30 years old, 40
0:18:08
years old. Right. Well, but like Harley-Davidson, like the company makes grip. I'm talking like the plain as fuck, like bare rubber grips that come with a brand new bike. Yeah. Like
0:18:19
if that's like what's still on your bike, I mean that's one of the easier things to change. As a bigger guy who also is a huge motorcycle enthusiast, how do you feel when you see a guy 300 plus pounds on like a little 500cc?
0:18:36
Honestly, I don't see it very often.
0:18:38
It is comedy when you do see it though. I mean, the bike can't go that fast. But like, I'll tell you this, so at one point I had a 1200cc motorcycle, which for comparison, like you're big, when you think of like a bagger when it comes to Harley, those are like 1800cc. I was still doing 90 on that 1200cc.
0:19:01
So that bike can move, you know, a 350, 400 pound person.
0:19:05
But I don't even mean in terms of its ability to drive, I just mean how a guy, a big guy looks on a little bike.
0:19:12
Yeah, it's not, it's not, I can't imagine it's comfortable either.
0:19:15
It's kind of like when I went and rode horses that I didn't want to do. You know, like, oh, we'll put you on fucking Tim. He's a, he's a hoss. And I still made Tim look small. I'm like, this ain't fun for me. What kind of a, how, how many hands? He had four hoofs. That's how, that's how people measure the height of horses, is how many hands tall they are I'm a little where it came from he must my hand you probably was 34 to my hands
0:19:42
Oh, not a chance
0:19:44
Never mind
0:19:46
How many hands of the horse have? He had four you just said he had four hooves. That's what he did. My hoof is not a hand
0:19:53
Whoa, I don't know how many hands he had. You went horseback riding like last year didn't you? You rode a horse? Yeah
0:19:59
Yeah.
0:20:00
Was it as exhilarating as riding a motorcycle? Absolutely not. Because it's one horsepower instead of...
0:20:07
And I describe it like this. For a majority of the time, riding a motorcycle is fairly predictable. Like I know that if I pull on that throttle, I'm going to go. A horse has a 100% mind of its own. You can guide it, but like if that horse decides he's going to be a prick, there's not a whole lot I can do to stop that from happening.
0:20:30
Yeah, if you spook it.
0:20:32
You guys obviously all know my dad, but when we went horseback riding the time I'm talking about where I was with the four hoofed horse, my dad got yelled at so many times by the lead because his horse would be fucking eating shit, you know, eating whatever, vegetation. They're like, do not let your horse graze. My dad's like, no, he's chilling. He's good. They're like, do not let him graze. My dad would be like, literally a football field behind us. They're like, oh my god, I'm going to go right back and get him. My dad catches back up with us. He's like, well, I don't know what the big deal is. He was hungry. I'm not going to starve him. I'm like, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to do that. Well, and they're probably, they don't want him grazing on trails like that because they
0:21:11
have no idea if there's been anything sprayed in that area.
0:21:15
Sure.
0:21:15
Or if they have the next group on, they're supposed to ride the trail, and then my dad's taught it's OK to graze. Whatever. My dad's got habits.
0:21:24
Have you guys galloped on a horse?
0:21:26
Yeah, it hurts my shit out of the testicles.
0:21:28
It is scary.
0:21:30
Because my problem is being a bigger guy.
0:21:33
Like, if you're going to ride your huge balls, well, that.
0:21:37
That, for sure.
0:21:38
But, like, on the jockeys, they don't actually sit. You basically have to hold yourself up.
0:21:46
That's how you don't get your balls smashed.
0:21:48
Yeah.
0:21:49
Squatting. But I've tried positioning in so many different ways, and every time, if it's not that, then I've got so much going on up here that it's just constant.
0:22:02
You and I are not meant to be on horses.
0:22:04
Iron horses.
0:22:05
Yeah.
0:22:06
There you go. Did you guys bet on Kentucky Derby?
0:22:09
No.
0:22:10
Oh, that's...
0:22:11
Yeah.
0:22:12
I actually know.
0:22:13
You had to do it from specific websites.
0:22:16
You had to use TBG in Iowa.
0:22:17
I don't feel like doing that.
0:22:18
Oh, really? Yeah, you can't just go... Fanduil didn't have it? It's a Fanduil company, but you can't just hop on there and go through their partner app. Which is fine, but I already invested enough money in the FanDuel app, I don't need to get another app. Is that what it's called? Investing? Yeah, if you check my P&L, I'm up 1%. Oh, should I read that?
0:22:40
Dang!
0:22:41
It's up after last night. Last night I hit a good one. Yeah, I've always been fairly close to even, but I haven't checked in a while. At one point, Jim, I saw yours. You had like 1,400 bet and 400 returned. That was very early on. Oh, that had to have been like three years ago. Yeah, yeah, when I first got legalized.
0:22:59
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I'm way past that now. Phil, what about you?
0:23:02
We should all bet on this stuff.
0:23:03
I don't know.
0:23:04
I'm not allowed to bet.
0:23:05
Yeah.
0:23:06
Nick, don't bet on it. Mine, OK. Mine's actually, mine looks pretty good after yesterday. I have bet $23,727. And I have won $24,095. I'm up $376. What if I divide that into what I bet?
0:23:23
That just seems so hard to believe. You really think you've bet that much?
0:23:28
Well, it's not like I'm putting in $23,000. I put in $100 and I bet that on 18 different bets. Lost 50, up 50, lost 50, up 50.
0:23:39
50 up, 50 lost, 50 up, 50 lucky.
0:23:42
All right, so I have bet $20,717, and I have won $18,802.
0:23:50
Wait, wait, what's your net there?
0:23:52
I'm down $19,500. Ouch.
0:23:54
Oof.
0:23:55
I am up 1.55%.
0:23:59
Yeah. What a terrible investment. I've bet $2,061. Get up to the majors. He never...
0:24:08
$2,061. And I've won $1820.
0:24:12
You guys are bad.
0:24:14
So I'm down $240.
0:24:15
You guys should practice. Dang.
0:24:17
I can't believe I'm down $1,800.
0:24:18
Yeah, that's over a course of what, three or four years?
0:24:21
October of 2019.
0:24:22
How does that make you feel? Yeah, four years. So, that's not terrible. What makes me feel... Well, but like there was a lot of times though when I was winning, when I hit that streak, but I was doing it in person. So that doesn't attribute there.
0:24:35
Wiley, if you ever get into sports betting, I've got tips for you, buddy.
0:24:40
But here's my argument. We've all just learned that we basically do this for fun. No one's making crazy money on sports betting. But you've spent $23,000 and I've spent $1,000 on the same fund.
0:24:53
Yeah, but I've been doing it a lot longer than you.
0:24:55
And it's not that he's spent $23,000. How many of those bets are using the same money?
0:25:02
Almost all of them.
0:25:03
Right. I wish I could see, maybe if I go on the computer.
0:25:08
Like total deposits or something?
0:25:09
Correct.
0:25:10
You can look at deposits. You should look at that.
0:25:12
I'm going to try. I don't know how.
0:25:13
Because I think that would be more telling. I definitely have not put $20,000 into...
0:25:18
Activity statement? There's a way to do it on there, I'm sure. Oh, here we go. Oh yeah, I'm not deposited. Here we go. So I just gotta go all time. Is that under... I'm in activity statement. I can only go back to May of 2021. I wonder what the Barstool guys...
0:25:32
Oh, fuck. I have deposited...
0:25:36
This is not good. I've withdrawn a lot more. So since May of 21, so I guess two years as far back as I can go, I've deposited 5,700. Oh, well okay, I thought that was going to be a lot more. I've withdrawn 7,500. Yeah, okay, 5,700 is not that much. I've withdrawn 1,800 more than I've deposited. I must have started out really shitty. So mine goes back
0:25:59
to May 21. Yeah, you must have started out real bad. Okay, so since May of 21, I've deposited $725.
0:26:08
Oh, that's pretty good.
0:26:09
Oh, that's nothing.
0:26:10
What have you withdrawn?
0:26:11
$120.
0:26:13
I rarely withdraw it, I just use it to make more bets.
0:26:18
For fun.
0:26:19
I can't believe I've withdrawn $725.
0:26:20
You are their favorite type of person.
0:26:21
But look at this, I've made 147 bets, and I've won 33. What's that percentage? I've made 565 bets, but so many are dumb parlays. I've made 565 bets. That's a 22% win rate. Well that's horrible. That's not bad. No, I'm not for betting. I don't think that's that bad. If you think that 95% of my bets are parlays, that's different. So I've made 565 bets in that two year span and I've won 160. But a lot of those are straight bets too. A lot of them are parlays, a lot of them are...
0:26:59
That's one in five, so that's about 22%.
0:27:02
I just hope mine is better than Jim's. Hold on.
0:27:04
That's about to be the exact almost similar...
0:27:05
160 versus 65. What was yours Jim?
0:27:07
22.4%.
0:27:09
Yours is going to be almost the same.
0:27:10
Suck it Jim! 28.3!
0:27:13
Oh, 28. That's funny.
0:27:14
My answer is 10-4.
0:27:15
But my average bed size is probably only 25 bucks. Is that your unit? If I was one of those people who were like, my unit's this, yeah, that would be my unit.
0:27:24
It's 25 bucks.
0:27:25
What is your unit when it comes to craps?
0:27:30
So that's really difficult.
0:27:31
$5.
0:27:32
I'm an experienced craps player.
0:27:33
I've played a lot.
0:27:34
And it just depends.
0:27:35
I'm going to play, the table minimum is going to be my unit. Because if it's a $10 table, you should play more on your odds than you should. So I'm just going to bet the minimum on the pass line. So it just depends on the table.
0:27:47
Your slot unit's higher.
0:27:49
My slot unit's big.
0:27:50
Not big enough.
0:27:51
This boy loves the slots.
0:27:52
No, he goes like halfway. I don't know what that means. When you play the slots, you've got to put in at least a hundo, and you've got to go
0:28:00
max bet.
0:28:01
He doesn't know what max bet is in these slots. I was showing him yesterday. I'm not saying your max bet should be $25 per spin. But like if it's, let's just say, penny slots and they're saying 725 credits. That's $7.25. Yeah, you should be betting that every time. Not $3.75. Do you think? That's true. That gives you the best odds to win. How does that work? Is that true? The higher your D-Noms are, the higher the payout percentage. You're better off betting $0.70 at $7.00. You're better off betting that than you are betting $7.25 on one penny. Because the odds go up as your D-Nom goes up. What the hell is a D-Nom? Denomination. So you're playing one penny, two pennies, five cents, ten cents, a dollar, whatever your denomination is. So wouldn't you max that out? It depends. So like I showed him, so like on the slot that I was showing Wiley, just like this.
0:28:59
I guess it depends on the game, yeah.
0:29:00
Yeah, so like most games have variable denominations, so if you start out on a penny slot, a true penny slot, you can choose to make it two cents, five cents, ten cents, twenty-five cents, whatever it might be. So your max bet on a penny might be $.725. But as soon as you hit $.2, now that $.725 turns into $.1450
0:29:19
in the max.
0:29:19
OK, so we're on the same bet. I'm saying whatever the max on that machine that you can do, that's what you should be playing every spin.
0:29:28
That's fucking huge, dude.
0:29:31
Check the scoreboard. I want a truck using that machine.
0:29:35
He did.
0:29:35
He did.
0:29:36
That truck was only $1,000.
0:29:37
$1,300.
0:29:40
I will say this, though. We did have somewhat of a smart strategy. We're playing this one game where the pigs were getting bigger.
0:29:47
Have you ever played that?
0:29:48
No.
0:29:48
The top, the pigs are getting bigger. And then Travis is like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's check the, what was it? You said the value is the same if you go down?
0:29:56
That's what I'm saying. We're checking the denom. So the pigs stayed the same size, meaning they had the same odds of triggering, no matter what the denomination was. So I'm like, okay, so whatever we want to bet, we wanted to bet, I think it was two or three bucks. You might as well bet the smallest amount you can on the highest DIN on because your odds are better.
0:30:12
So you can get the pigs fatter.
0:30:14
Exactly.
0:30:15
Can you follow on all this?
0:30:16
No.
0:30:17
It's not rocket sciences, okay?
0:30:18
Imagine if you put that time and energy into learning the stock market, how rich you would
0:30:24
be.
0:30:25
I know the stock market pretty well. Right, right. Yeah, stocks always
0:30:27
go up next. That's just as much of a gamble as fucking slots in today's day and age. Because you're betting on blue chips, you might lose, like I did, 28% last year, but then this year it's up 17%, so you just never know. So you're still down 11%. Yeah, thanks, Jim. Okay, just want to make sure I'm doing my math right there. Just keep putting more money in. We're
0:30:46
young. Fuck it. Oh, yeah. It'll bounce back. All right, what's the next topic? Instagram.
0:30:50
Wait, did we get everything on and out of track or no?
0:30:51
I think so.
0:30:52
Basically, that I just smoked you guys.
0:30:53
Yeah, Phil, you're an athlete.
0:30:54
I want to see Phil run on barefoot versus me in shoes.
0:30:55
I'm faster barefoot.
0:30:56
Not on a track, it would hurt like two numbers. You're better than a run on a track barefoot.
0:30:58
If I was on the turf running next to you and you were on the track with shoes, I think
0:30:59
I would win.
0:31:00
We'll have to find out.
0:31:01
Hey boys, I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:02
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:03
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:04
I'm a big fan of you. I'm a big fan of you. I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:07
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:08
I'm a big fan of you. I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:10
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:11
I'm a big fan of you. I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:13
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:14
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:15
I'm a big fan of you.
0:31:16
I'm a big fan of you. and you're on the track with shoes, I think I would. We'll have to find out. Hey boys, I just hit my move goal by sitting here. 200% for the day.
0:31:28
That's pretty good. What's a move goal?
0:31:30
What's a busy day? Like 635 calories. What is a move goal?
0:31:34
It's on your Apple Watch? No, but I mean, how do you get it? By moving? So you're fucking sitting. So because I'm talking, I guess.
0:31:40
Sitting on a stool.
0:31:41
Sitting on a stool, I guess.
0:31:42
Coughing.
0:31:43
He's not hit my Stan goal. Like, it's been a good day.
0:31:45
He has one leg down on the ground, so it must be saying, OK, well, he's burning three calories per second.
0:31:50
Sam, I only got four hours of sleep last night.
0:31:53
Dude, you can't do that.
0:31:55
You've got to change that.
0:31:57
Dude, that along with the two hot dogs every two hours. That's not an every fucking day thing. I'm not convinced.
0:32:04
But you said...
0:32:05
Over the last seven days, I've averaged five hours and 42 minutes of sleep per day. How many hot dogs per day?
0:32:10
One less than you think.
0:32:13
How many glizzies?
0:32:15
Gross.
0:32:17
Alright, so the question this week, which apparently was a bad choice, but I'm going to blame you back to radio. Which supposedly better than this podcast. I have a piggyback question. Alright, good. So Phil can help us out, but we do have some answers. So the question was, what's the best era of music? Alright? So, you guys have your opinions, I'll read out what we have.
0:32:41
I'm gonna go like the BC era.
0:32:44
Like caveman era? Yeah. Just like banging on... Yelling and screaming and yeah sure and rocks yeah banging animals yep Travis peeing again yeah hey while you're up grab me a beer pretty much every day every day sometimes two or three times a day dude that's not good you need to go to the doctor why that's a sign of something bad money yeah
0:33:13
Doctors cost money. Sometimes I get bloody noses and it means I need to change my furnace filter.
0:33:20
You ever do that?
0:33:21
Yeah, I did change my furnace filter. It still happens. Oh. Yeah, you're fucked up then. Jimmy, check if your nose is cauterized.
0:33:29
That hurts. That sounds terrible. That's what a lot of people do.
0:33:32
Yeah. You got in your office today. Yeah, let's just shove a burning prod, probe, whatever, into my nostril. I'll do it for you for free.
0:33:39
And then how am I supposed to clear my nose for
0:33:39
two weeks after that? Imagine the smell. Burning flesh in your nose. I wonder if you'd smell it. I would. Apple or regular? It's so high up there. Regular. If it damages you. Not regular. Whoa. Apple. I'm glad we're just drinking all my apples, guys. Dude, they're easy to get now, all day. You can make them yourself. They don't make them anymore. You can make them yourself. They were everywhere last summer. Well that was last summer. Mangoes coming out soon right? Yeah I thought it was peach. Oh peach. I don't know where I got mango from. Alright anyway. Instagram. Instagram answer is Jocelyn said being alive at the same time as Morgan Wallen. What was the
0:34:21
question? Oh wait you mean Morgan Wallen who just decided to announce today he's taking six weeks off. It's not his fault. It's a strict vocal rest from his doctor. Or maybe learn how to be a singer before you announce a nationwide tour. Dude I actually respect it. I hate that he did that. He's you gotta realize though like. It's like a professional athlete getting hurt. It really is. But beyond that most most artists in the last I would say in our lifetime, would have just played the show, sounded like shit, and lip sung a bunch, had us back up sing a bunch. Like, I actually respect it. It's not like he's saying, hey, your money's gone. He's like, hey, we're just going to have to reschedule this. I'm sorry.
0:35:07
But then what happens if you can't make the rescheduled date?
0:35:10
You get your money back at the point of purchase. So, I feel for him. I still think what he did was bullshit, the one that he warmed up for and everything like, shitted on the Luke Combs thing like, hey I'm gonna give you this show for free, but I get like the six weeks of vocal rest, I fuck me. I mean imagine, imagine LeBron being like, yeah I sprained my ankle, I'm gonna take four weeks off, I'm going to give you guys free tickets to the next, or I'm gonna let you come to another fucking game for free because you already paid. Instead, you would just go to that fucking game and LeBron wouldn't be playing.
0:35:46
Yeah, but it'd be the equivalent to LeBron being like, oh, I can't play four weeks because of muscle stiffness.
0:35:53
It's not a thing.
0:35:54
It is.
0:35:55
You can do permanent damage to your vocals while singing.
0:35:56
Yeah, that's what they all claim. I don't believe it.
0:35:57
Then learn how to sing right.
0:35:58
Yeah, I don't believe it.
0:36:01
Okay, if you don't believe it, just watch any singer who was really good in the 80s now try to sing their songs in 2023. And then you'll see the damage you can do to your vocal cords.
0:36:11
Well, yeah, long term.
0:36:12
Yeah, and it's only worse if you try to push through an injury.
0:36:16
Yeah, but that's being an athlete.
0:36:18
If you're going to compare.
0:36:19
Come on now. Your vocal cords are a muscle. Is that true?
0:36:24
I don't know.
0:36:25
I've heard that singing is a muscle.
0:36:28
Hey, you're our stat boy. Look it up. I don't know. It's got to be a muscle. It is.
0:36:34
Why don't you just Google,
0:36:36
what are the...
0:36:37
Why does Morgan Wallen suck?
0:36:38
What are the downsides to singing?
0:36:40
I don't know if they're muscles,
0:36:41
because it's just strings, literally, that vibrate.
0:36:44
What's bad about singing with injured vocal cords? Injured...
0:36:49
Your vocal cords are two bands of muscle inside your voice box.
0:36:53
Muscle.
0:36:54
That allow you to vocalize or make sounds.
0:36:56
And what happens if you sing while they're injured?
0:36:58
You get nodes.
0:37:00
Was that a dumb prompt? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's just like a strained muscle, so you have to... I mean, if you're going to be a professional singer, you're going to be a professional athlete, learn how to take care of your muscles. Have you guys seen Miley Cyrus sing now after she had that surgery? No. She sounds like a man. She's still a good singer but she sounds a couple octaves lower. What happened to her? She was already low. Too much blow? I mean she's been singing since she was like 10 Professionally and so they got so she really damaged. Oh, so she didn't take care of her not vocal muscle
0:37:45
I don't like if you think about people like The best vocalists of our current time would be like people like Adele right? She'll do like one show a week even our friend Lauren Hall won't do more than like two max three a week. This tour, these big conglomerates book your tour out and they give you as many days to maximize the venues, your travel schedule, whatever. They'll have these motherfuckers doing like five shows in seven days. You just go sing out there as hard as you can for two hours five nights in a row.
0:38:17
So you're saying he has no say in his own schedule.
0:38:21
He has limited say, yeah. Well, apparently he has some say because he can take six weeks off. With a doctor's order. With a doctor's order. Here, let me write you a doctor's number right here. I'm sure he doesn't want the money of touring.
0:38:36
He doesn't need the money. He's got plenty of that.
0:38:39
He needs to lay off the booze, I think is what it is.
0:38:44
Probably ripping those cigs too, don't help.
0:38:46
Yep.
0:38:47
Yep.
0:38:48
His phone keeps going off
0:38:49
online
0:38:51
that's my over the motion of my diet over you know i guess uh... the actual real answer this week historically it's got to be the sixty seventies but personally the nineties two thousand what was the big question of the year i said what is the best era of music
0:39:07
sixty seventies he thinks british invasion students to travel and i guess how do you evaluate the best? You could argue the 50s, like Chuck Berry...
0:39:18
What era changed music? Yeah, I don't know. If you look at the jump from the 50s to the 60s, it was pretty significant. I think the 60s really started a lot of that.
0:39:31
Rock and roll had the Beatles. Yeah, the British Revision was a kickstart. But if you take what is most interesting about music is if you take like Chuck Berry if you listen to what and I'm not this is not a thought on my own head I've heard this elsewhere but like if you take the music he was listening to which would be like Buddy Holly and before and what he turned into. Buddy Holly died in Iowa on Lawrence family's property in Clear Lake Damn do they have a memorial? There is yeah the city bought it. Anyways if you listen to what they were listening to and what they turned it into, I think that's what the most impressive thing is. So, like Nirvana, they were listening to hair metal and came up with Heart Shaped Box and Teen Spirit. What's most impressive is what people create out of their own minds that didn't exist prior. But what's the best? I mean, that's a stupid question because it's subjective. I think it's a personal question. I think Kanye's re-registration, that was incredible. That was like 2002, 2003. Are we allowed to say that on this podcast? You're allowed to appreciate good music when it was good music. Early Kanye was great. Early Lil Wayne. Carter II, Carter III. Another person said, 90's country, hands down, all caps. I like that. Shania, Reba.
0:40:56
Brooks and Dunn.
0:40:57
Brooks and Dunn, yeah.
0:40:58
CoachTrainer32 says, Irish.
0:40:59
What? Not genre.
0:41:01
Time period, right?
0:41:02
Yeah.
0:41:03
We have an issue with our followers being able to read.
0:41:04
BeefyT said, 2000s.
0:41:05
Yeah, well he's also the one that has 2,500 followers.
0:41:06
I'm not sure if that's true.
0:41:07
I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.
0:41:11
I'm not sure.
0:41:12
I'm not sure.
0:41:13
I'm not sure.
0:41:14
I'm not sure.
0:41:15
I'm not sure. I'm not sure. BVT said 2000s. Yeah, well he's also the one that has 2,500 followers on a punk rock 2000s throwback Spotify
0:41:25
playlist.
0:41:26
He does.
0:41:27
I'll follow it, that's sick. Is it still out there?
0:41:29
Yeah, but like he's got way too many songs on there.
0:41:32
The playlist is like 1,300 songs.
0:41:33
No, it needs to be like 5, 6 hours. That's a good... Yeah, it's like 26 hours.
0:41:38
It's got way too long.
0:41:39
That's ridiculous.
0:41:38
Pretty much.
0:41:39
Alright, last answer, someone just said, uh, the 70s.
0:41:42
I get that.
0:41:43
Yeah. So you can tell clearly by not only the number of answers we got, but the quality of the answers, that that was a terrible fucking question.
0:41:51
Yeah, yeah, I know.
0:41:52
But hey, it spawned some fun facts out of Travis, so.
0:41:55
I'm a music nut.
0:41:56
There you go.
0:41:57
Um, alright, I'll check the update on the poll as of right now. Would you share your location with close friends? It is tied 50-50. Really? We can talk about that now.
0:42:10
So if you look through mine, it's a weird mix. There's some people I don't remember how or why. At this point I'm too afraid to take them off. But I think it's kind of cool because I've got a few people that are super spread out. So every once in a while I'll zoom out on the map
0:42:29
and see, hey, I'm 800 miles away from so-and-so. Yeah. My sister's always 1,300 miles away. It's kind of cool.
0:42:36
She's in Arizona. I see the perks of it. California. I've always had a principle of never sharing it with literally anyone, and I can't break it.
0:42:45
My other, there is one big thing that needs to be said, and I'm targeting one of our listeners with this. Mr. N. Kratz, if I share my location with you and you don't share it back, I'm going to stop sharing my location with you.
0:42:59
That's normal. Did he get pissed that that happened?
0:43:03
No, no, no. I share my location with him and his is coincidentally always off.
0:43:09
So this is out of courteousness.
0:43:11
Did he accept it, but he turns it off?
0:43:13
He turns his location off, yeah.
0:43:15
Oh.
0:43:16
Wow.
0:43:17
Which is unacceptable.
0:43:18
Do you want to know... I don't know if I can share my trick.
0:43:20
I don't even use it.
0:43:21
No, but there could be wives listening to this podcast. So 99% of the people that share their location through their phone, or through Apple I should say, is through their iPhone. But if you have another Apple device, such as an iPad, you can set it so that your iPad dictates your current location. So like if you're ever out with the boys and you don't want someone to know that you're going to potentially an adult gentleman's club, don't worry about it. You can switch your location to the iPad, leave the iPad in the hotel, and then they never know that you're at a titty bar. Well, the person that I'm targeting would say that he's permanently at home then. He'd never left. So, if anyone's listening and needs to hide their location
0:44:13
without giving it away. There you go. So, Trav, you're only mad because it's like a courtesy thing. You don't actually really care if he has your location and you don't
0:44:23
have his. I just feel like, I just feel like if I'm somewhere and you, and it's happened, can text me, oh you're at this place, and then I go look at yours.
0:44:33
So he does that too?
0:44:34
Yeah, and then I go look at yours and you're not even sharing yours, then you're done. So final warning. That's fair.
0:44:41
Final warning.
0:44:42
Well then take him off right now. No, this is his final warning.
0:44:44
If he listens, he passes the test.
0:44:47
Exactly, he can have it until next Tuesday.
0:44:50
The only benefit is safety reasons, like if you're in trouble.
0:44:54
But what's another benefit of it?
0:44:55
I love having it. For instance, you two is a good example. I'm coming home and I'll be like, oh, I wonder what Nick and Phil are up to. I'm like, oh, they're at the house. Perfect.
0:45:07
I'll stop over.
0:45:08
What if they don't want you to know?
0:45:09
Nick doesn't share his location.
0:45:10
That would be one that I would like to have.
0:45:11
He's tried many times. One day he was almost going to do it, and then he decided not to Yeah, I can't break it. I mean outside of safety. I'm with so think about yesterday at the track. Where the fuck is Jim at? Yeah, you know what's on that one. That was fun stopping you
0:45:25
Or like there's been two or three times where I have like surprise buddies at a bar
0:45:29
Yeah, that's see I and they're like fuck If those are the friends that I have, then fuck them.
0:45:33
Hey, I'm meeting up with someone.
0:45:35
Like, I'm here. Where are you? Rather than, like, having to call them. I'm like, alright, he's five minutes away. Or that friend that's always late, like Abby. She'll be like, I'm on my way. I'm like, bitch, I can see you're at your house.
0:45:48
It's very convenient.
0:45:49
Yeah, okay. That's fair. You make a valid point.
0:45:52
But, I don't think I could do it.
0:45:54
I mean, what if one of these days you're driving back from seeing your special someone, and
0:45:59
all of a sudden you don't come home, Phil's wondering where you are, he can see, oh, he's on 61 but he's not moving. Well, it probably means you're in a ditch. Yeah, I mean, I feel like I've survived 30 years now without it.
0:46:13
I just don't risk it.
0:46:15
But you haven't had a location-enabled phone for 30 years. Well, I know, the world hasn't either. Dude, like what if you leave your
0:46:27
phone at someone's house and then you go there and like people are shooting at you and stuff like
0:46:32
the location thing is important to have. No see that was a reason it was bad. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah well let's we'll talk about there. Um I mean yeah no you're right it's
0:46:45
safety wise it plays a factor for sure. And I lost I left my phone in an Uber. Like, this was only less than a month ago. Were you drunk? Yes, Jim. Why do you think I was in a fucking Uber? And I left my phone in it. Maybe your car broke down because you didn't take care of it. I take care of my vehicles, unlike you. I got on Find My on the computer, and oh, it's all the way out in fucking Asbury. And then I messaged them through the computer said hey this is my address I'll give you cash and bring it back I would never be able to do that without my location on it. They did. It cost me 50 bucks. 50? Well I told him I'll give you $20. So you know I live out that way so why didn't you say hey? Well I wouldn't even know it was out there unless I had my location on it. This was at 3.30 in the morning and I messaged him hey I'll give you 20 bucks if you put my phone back, I'm really sorry. And then there was no response. And I was like, fuck it, I'll make it 50 after like three minutes, cause I was drunk. And he's like, sorry, I just saw this. I would have done it for the 20, but I'm on my way.
0:47:50
Wow.
0:47:51
That's good.
0:47:52
What the hell were we talking about
0:47:53
before we got way sidetracked by the dictionary? Genre of music.
0:47:57
No, that was long ago.
0:47:59
But people were saying genres
0:48:00
and it's supposed to be time periods.
0:48:03
Oh yeah.
0:48:04
Yeah, that too.
0:48:05
Why are you so far from the mic?
0:48:06
Oh, I just cracked a beer and I didn't...
0:48:08
We were talking about something else after though. We for sure moved on to...
0:48:13
Oh, location.
0:48:14
Location, yeah, yeah, yeah.
0:48:15
Location.
0:48:16
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
0:48:17
All right, well, we're done talking about that anyway.
0:48:19
So move on to what you're mad about.
0:48:21
Is it time for the next segment? Presented by Old Country Buffet.
0:48:23
Zisma, things I'm still mad about.
0:48:27
Presented by Old Country Buffet. If you're not following on Instagram, please do. Let's see what they're up to this week, folks. Last week they had how many?
0:48:33
$2.99?
0:48:34
Was it $2.99?
0:48:35
$2.98.
0:48:36
$2.98 last week.
0:48:37
I think it was $2.98.
0:48:39
Yeah, and then Jim thought it was a personal account.
0:48:41
No, that was $2.97, and they got us the $2.98.
0:48:44
Oh!
0:48:44
So we are plus two this week.
0:48:46
Let's go.
0:48:47
Who are they?
0:48:48
So if it works, that it goes in order. It does. I mean, it shows Phil.
0:48:56
That's right.
0:48:57
Nice. And then someone called Ten Grand.
0:49:00
Dude, they're listening!
0:49:01
I can see it.
0:49:02
They're a band.
0:49:03
I gotta see if Ten Grand follows us. Dude, if they're a follower of ours, that means they listen. I don't think they are. Come on, man.
0:49:08
How do I know?
0:49:09
I gotta search my followers. What's their Instagram name?
0:49:13
Ten Grand. T-E-N.
0:49:15
Grand? Grand. Alright, type that in, see if they follow us.
0:49:19
And then there's uh... Ink Link Marketing.
0:49:22
Ooh, Mall Reviews, that could be a fun one. What the fuck is that?
0:49:26
The Mall of America series.
0:49:28
Hold on, what was under Ten Grand? Ten Grand is not one of our followers.
0:49:31
Well, we're fucked. Uh, I... Why do you guys regularly follow?
0:49:35
I am DeeDee, uh, your future president.
0:49:37
I am DeeDee?
0:49:39
Yeah, I don't think any of these are gonna be, uh...
0:49:41
Nope, none of these. What matters though is they're at 300. Yeah, it's pick time. Dude, we're only 20 away from, uh... What'd I say we do? I... We should be taking screenshots because I feel like they use the following more than four accounts. Oh no, JJ! If they get to 320, I will Venmo request $100 from JJ for my clicker. Yeah, fuck that kid. You should do that now. That's what I said last week. You can't say that every week. I said 320. I'm a man of principle.
0:50:05
320.
0:50:06
Hold on one second.
0:50:07
It's no body counts, Jim.
0:50:08
I'm sharing one of Old Country Buffet's posts to my story right now.
0:50:17
You won't.
0:50:18
I just did.
0:50:19
To Kodiak or? No, it's a battle of the desserts. Blueberry versus chocolate brownie.
0:50:23
Which one's your favorite?
0:50:24
Blueberry or what? Blueberry.
0:50:26
It's like a pie in a cup. Oh, oh, it's like cupcakes. Blueberry cupcake or...
0:50:31
Or is it brownie muffin?
0:50:32
Hold on, what are the followers at? 300. 300.
0:50:35
Check it again.
0:50:36
It better not be 301, I'm gonna be pissed.
0:50:37
Jocelyn just responded to my story, knock this shit off right now.
0:50:38
301, come on!
0:50:39
Who is it?
0:50:40
Who is it? Who is it?
0:50:42
Who is it?
0:50:43
Who is it?
0:50:44
Who is it?
0:50:45
Who is it? Who is it? Who is it?
0:50:48
Who is it?
0:50:49
Who is it?
0:50:50
Who is it?
0:50:51
Who is it?
0:50:52
Who is it?
0:50:53
3-0-1!
0:50:55
Let's do it!
0:50:57
Who is it? Who is it?
0:50:59
Nick. You bastard. Um, wait, Jocelyn said knock... Knock this shit right off.
0:51:07
And then she said buffet stands for
0:51:09
big, ugly, fat fucks eating together. Wow.
0:51:13
Wait, so I tell the story about my uncle
0:51:15
getting kicked out of a buffet? Yeah, are you still mad about it? No, it's fucking hilarious. I think I'm still mad about Presumption of Electricity Buffet. Now up to 301 votes. Yes, 301. When I get to 320, I will Venmo request JJ Gassitis $100 with the caption, Clicker, from freshman year, asshole.
0:51:34
Ha ha ha ha. Okay, because I'm still mad about this week. Oh, go ahead. I was just going to, like, does she have like an alert on my account, because I'm telling you, that was less than 30 seconds from the time I shared that post to my story.
0:51:43
Maybe she's scrolling. There's a chance.
0:51:45
She could be scrolling.
0:51:46
We'll find out.
0:51:47
Is she a love interest?
0:51:48
Why don't you listen to this?
0:51:49
I don't know, I might have to peruse that.
0:51:50
Send her a little DM. Sup.
0:51:52
She looks good in here.
0:51:53
First date at the buffet.
0:51:54
Oh.
0:51:55
She would love that.
0:51:56
All right, we're going to, where did we say there was...
0:52:02
Big ugly fat fucks eating again?
0:52:04
No, the nearest buffet.
0:52:05
The Old Country Buffet is like near Naperville.
0:52:08
Yeah. And then we're gonna go to Champs.
0:52:10
Yeah, and then we're gonna go up to Brookfield and go to Champs.
0:52:12
Oh, yeah we are.
0:52:13
Take her on your bike, Phil's driving. No, you gotta drive your bike, she refuses to go on the bike.
0:52:17
Take my vehicle, I don't care. But I'm not driving, because I'm gonna be...
0:52:21
What? What was that?
0:52:23
Drinking.
0:52:24
I'll be there tomorrow. What where at a country buffet. Oh, no, that's not a song bro. You won't go to a country tomorrow
0:52:25
I could you won't Please make a little give you $10 towards your meal. No, you want to be a fire brother get spread it. Yeah, that's a waste
0:52:33
Oh, we didn't even mention that
0:52:34
Good, we're not doing that. I went over my time. I'm wait. I would I bet the under yeah, but You said you were so confident you were under that if I went over, you would pay for it. I think it's only like $8.
0:52:44
I don't even know what threading is anyway.
0:52:47
They like take a little string and they like... Alright, how about this, how about this, I will pay for it, but you have to let it grow for like a month first. It wouldn't look any different.
0:52:55
Alright, two to three months then. How is it that eyebrows, like, they don't... I've never gotten them shape trimmed and they don't... They don't grow.
0:53:04
I think everyone's different
0:53:15
I've actually googled this before because I've pointed to the same thing they just fall out at such a rapid rate that it just like kind of self maintains
0:53:24
well, you're like a cat, you self clean don't ever do that again
0:53:29
thank god it's the video that's funny we were at the Diamond Jail and there was
0:53:34
an eyebrow hair
0:53:35
that is so gross, that was an eyelash
0:53:37
how do you know?
0:53:37
it was like stained
0:53:38
oh I know, there was a skin follicle on the end of it. And it was curved like an eyelash. So it could be just a really long eyebrow. It was on the table, sitting directly in front of me, and I was not having fun. And Nick was just like, it's not just the motherfucking hair. I saw somebody's ugly face. How do you know they were ugly? Who the hell's house is that sports book?
0:53:59
Hey, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you,
0:54:07
you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you ever thought about that?
0:54:26
I have a lot. I've thought about that a lot. Thanks, assholes.
0:54:29
So anyways, things I'm still mad about. Are we there yet? Yeah.
0:54:32
Yeah. Presented by Old Country with Faye.
0:54:34
300 followers.
0:54:35
301.
0:54:36
301. Fuck yeah. Save the 320. I'm Ben Wardquist. I'm JJ. Things I'm still mad about this week. This has been one that I've been wanting to talk about for the last four weeks, but I kept thinking of a better one that I wanted to do instead. So it's time for the inevitable things. I'm so mad about fireball Okay, any initial commentary on you guys about what it's about you say grossed. Yeah, I don't necessarily mind it
0:54:58
I'll never order a shot of fireball, but if someone gives me one. I'm gonna take it
0:55:02
So I got a few things on fireball
0:55:04
I'm mad about fireball for a variety of reasons First things first, my, let's flash back to Sweet Trav's 21st birthday. I have had Fireball at this point a dozen times, never liked it, and almost every time I've had it prior to my 21st birthday, it almost always sat wrong in my stomach. So on my 21st birthday, which happened to be a fucking Tuesday, I went out with a good buddy whose birthday is one day... JJ...
0:55:28
No.
0:55:28
Gestitis? Gestitis? No, this is in Dubuque actually. It's the old Skinny McGinnis when I was right next to...
0:55:48
First of May.
0:55:49
First of May.
0:55:50
With the five dollar wheel spins.
0:55:51
So, I was in Skinny McGinnis on a Tuesday, there's like surprisingly like 15 people there. You'd think there'd be zero on a Tuesday. It's Dubuque, Iowa. It's fucking nine o'clock at night. There's nothing going on. There's like 15 people there. Someone finds out it's their birthday.
0:56:05
Get two shots of Fireball.
0:56:06
And I was like, ooh, that's not a good idea. You know, we've been drinking for a couple hours. Nothing crazy. I took this shot of Fireball that I didn't want, unchilled. To warm.
0:56:11
Warm, thank you. Room temperature.
0:56:13
To the shot of Fireball. Same as your preferred beer temperate. Anyways, I walked out. I took the shot of Fireball.
0:56:17
Instantly I go, that's not right.
0:56:18
Somebody's got to be kidding me.
0:56:19
I'm not going to drink that.
0:56:20
I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. I'm not going to drink that. Anyways, I walked outside, I took the shadow fireball, instantly I go, that's not right. Something doesn't feel good. It felt like, you ever done an Irish car bomb, when you drop that in, if you let it sit, it just curdles. That's what was happening in my stomach after I took that fireball. I don't know if that's how science works. It does, trust me. So I went outside, as you can imagine, spilled my guts, walked back inside, someone's like, Do it all, we'll chill. And I was like, fuck no, I'm not doing it. They're like, just do it. I'm like, okay, fine. So I had one chilled. 30 seconds later, I'm back out front on Main Street in Dubuque. So that night goes on. I vow I'm never taking Fireball again. Since then, it's been presented to me maybe 3, 4,000 times. It's like whenever someone buys a shot. It's a go-to fireball. No fuck you I don't want fireball and it gets to the point now We're playing shows even just on Saturday night fucking stage is rocking people having a good time people bring shots up What do they bring up fireball? So what do I do here deal have two shots of fireball because I'm not fucking drinking it So anyways, so you're like the pregnant woman in that situation and he's drinking for two. That's fine. So the reasons I'm so mad at Fireball is a variety of reasons. First of all, it tastes like fucking shit. I don't care what anyone says, it tastes horrible. Okay? But the reason I'm more mad about it is not the piss-poor taste, the curdling of the stomach, the nastiness. The reason I'm more mad is that it labels itself as a whiskey. And if you're unfamiliar with this, if you ever look at a bottle of fireball, a bottle of fireball, it is fireball whiskey. Cinnamon whiskey. Now when you look at the shooters, it does not say whiskey. And it's because it is not the same formula in the shooters. It's actually a malt beverage. No way. They got sued for this. They got sued for this. You can look it up right now. No way. Jamie, look it up. Filthy Phil. Who's Jamie? Jamie from... he's Joe Rogan's Phil. That is insane. I've never heard that. So they got sued for this, because on their shots it now says fireball cinnamon. That's all it says. It doesn't say fireball cinnamon whiskey. On the bottle?
0:58:39
On the bottle it does, but on the shooter, because it's not the same. It's a malt beverage. Now that you mention that, I have had both. I don't enjoy it either way,
0:58:48
but it is more enjoyable out of the bottle. Phil, tell me about that.
0:58:54
Well here's the 10,000 foot overview. A class action lawsuit filed by a woman in Illinois claims that shot sized bottles of Fireball cinnamon sold at gas stations and supermarkets actually contain no whiskey at all, misleading customers who buy the brand's bottles.
0:59:11
They're often sold outside liquor stores for 99 cents. How did she discover that? Real alcoholic. Yeah, she goes, wait a second. I wonder if either her or like a friend like has some kind of an allergy to malt liquor and so you're drinking and you're thinking you're fine. I do know people that can't drink malt liquor and then all of a sudden you get sick,
0:59:37
and then you start actually like, you know, drinking off it. So anyways, the reasons I'm so mad about it is there's several layers to it. First of all, they're liars. And second of all, their product sucks cock. So those are the two things I'm mad about.
0:59:50
Okay, when you said the agitation of your stomach, no, you said curdling of your stomach. Maybe think of your stupid rule about agitating the beer. Have you guys heard this?
1:00:00
That's not stupid.
1:00:01
It's so stupid.
1:00:02
Oh, I have heard of this.
1:00:03
You take your finger under your eye and then...
1:00:05
Yes. No, no, no.
1:00:07
Well, no.
1:00:08
What he says...
1:00:09
Alright, you know...
1:00:10
Oh, you know how when you pour a beer, you're supposed to pour it on the...
1:00:11
He thinks he's like this beer connoisseur.
1:00:13
You're supposed to tilt the glass and pour it on the glass so it doesn't foam everywhere.
1:00:19
Travis thinks that you just pour it straight down to the bottle so it agitates the beer. Travis watched a TikTok once.
1:00:25
You ever seen John Taffer?
1:00:26
I saw that video. Then John Taffer talked about this years after I saw it. And then he went viral talking about it.
1:00:28
It's stupid. It's not stupid. Think about if you have two draft beers and you're like, oh my god, I feel bloated. Agitate them, sons of bitches. You'll have 2,000 of them that feel great.
1:00:33
Speaking of pouring beers, you ever want to know if a bar has clean glassware?
1:00:34
You look at an empty glass that's had a beer in it. If there are no foam, there's no foam sticking to the outside, you're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time.
1:00:41
You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time.
1:00:45
You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time.
1:00:46
You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time. You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time.
1:00:50
You're going to have a beer that's been in there for a long time.
1:00:51
if there are no foam, there's no foam like sticking to the outside, that means that the glass is dirty. No. A clean glass, the foam will like... Obviously if you let it sit there for like 30 minutes it's not gonna be there. That's gonna depend on the beer though, right? Because there's some beers that are just
1:01:09
naturally super foamy. I don't know, try it out. But it's the sticking of the foam.
1:01:14
Jamie, look it up please. I'm less worried about the glass and I'm more worried about the lines.
1:01:19
The what?
1:01:20
The beer lines. They go to the taps.
1:01:23
Will you write it down please?
1:01:24
They're disgusting.
1:01:25
You think so?
1:01:26
We have a co-worker.
1:01:27
I don't drink draft beer. At what percent alcohol does it kill all germs?
1:01:34
Not beer. There's enough alcohol. Alcohol kills 99.9% of germs. Jim but just tell me what percent. Spraw handling. What am I supposed to look up? Is it fact or fiction? But you can't type that on Google. Just say clean glass... fuck I don't know how to type this. Foam. Yeah yeah. Dirty glass no foam or something. I don't fucking know. I'm gonna laugh if I've been, because I've been believing this for years. This is why we need someone like this. We need to get him a computer.
1:02:07
My phone is on 5%. I didn't prepare for this.
1:02:09
I have mine charged.
1:02:10
You can have mine. I actually have a battery block over there, but we're almost done.
1:02:16
They're all videos.
1:02:17
What?
1:02:18
We'll figure this out later.
1:02:19
What are you on YouTube?
1:02:20
All these YouTube videos are on YouTube, dude.
1:02:21
I can't. Alright, well, I guess if you find anything out, just jump right back in. You're the worst producer ever. You know, you were doing better last week as just a guest, talking about your wood.
1:02:40
Yeah, you guys, I don't even have the Wi-Fi here, it's just, I'm not prepared.
1:02:44
We're behind a fucking restaurant.
1:02:45
Still, are those your lawn working jeans, or were you working in the lawn today?
1:02:51
I mowed two lawns today.
1:02:54
Travis's and yours?
1:02:55
No, he didn't mow mine.
1:02:56
No.
1:02:57
Oh, your rental?
1:02:58
Yeah.
1:02:59
Oh, you're a landlord.
1:03:00
Oh, check.
1:03:01
So you have two properties? Technically.
1:03:03
The rental, I'm only a third owner in.
1:03:08
But I'm like kind of the maintenance guy.
1:03:10
Who do you own it with, a husband and wife? Yeah.
1:03:14
How's that? Do you have any weekend, late-time meetings?
1:03:20
You know, whenever my business partner says, let's go do something at the house, I just know...
1:03:29
I mean, he drinks beer like Travis, so I just know that that means he wants to drink a 30 pack or two and maybe paint something. Oh so you're the you're the woodworker he's the painter. No he's he just he's a supervisor the foreman that just sits there and drinks. Nah. It's fine though. Nah I'm good. He has work to be done. Yeah.
1:03:53
Don't do our listeners like that. Come on. I did you did you spray? Not today, but I I gotta figure out I got a metric fuckload of dandelions on my yard. I gotta put some stuff down. Yeah I helped you build that lawn. No you helped me rip the shit out of the yarn. Yes. When you have a new build they like plant the seed and then they put the what's it hay or straw over it. Yeah. And like I guess supposedly you can just let that just go away. I was like, fuck this. And so Nick and Cole, we were literally ripped all this.
1:04:34
It took two hours.
1:04:35
Long time.
1:04:36
Loaded it into a trailer and it was... I'm still finding those metal stakes in my heart.
1:04:42
I'm shocked that Nick actually volunteered to help. Based on what I've seen going on at Cali Pizza. And I offered pizza.
1:04:49
So you gotta be...
1:04:50
Also I was asked true so just did it did what what are we talking like what is true do you get the the trimmer working again today the trimmer like the weed whacker trimmer oh yeah I turned I like like so I can't I can't use the writer on everywhere there's some parts. So sorry you're just really boring Jim. Now you know what it's like to be friends with you.
1:05:20
Remember that stupid joke you did?
1:05:22
Oh should I do it on the pod? No but that's a D'Lea joke.
1:05:26
At a random time.
1:05:27
Yeah but that's a D'Lea joke I can't claim that as my own.
1:05:31
Okay just say what the joke is then.
1:05:33
I'll do it at some point.
1:05:34
Alright.
1:05:35
But it's not my joke it's D'Lea's so I just can't take credit for it. You can still do it. Yeah, well you point people take people's jokes All right, are we getting Lauren Hall on this podcast? Yeah, I think next week's the week because You said we're peaking in terms of number of listeners right now. That would be an appropriate time Yeah, I agree. I'm gonna make her promo and she's got a bone or insta Fuck you Travis Fuck you Travis
1:05:54
you