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From Paul Spencer of Second Nature Solutions, a conversation about the complexities and nuances of building resilient family enterprises, especially in the face of economic and political uncertainties that loom on the horizon. See more at secondnature.solutions.
Welcome to Resilience Talk hosted by
Paul Spencer of Second Nature Solutions.
Let's dive in.
Software engineers have a saying that
basically says, if you're not embarrassed
by your code from, say four months ago,
two months ago, even six months ago,
then you're not learning fast enough.
And what that means is that as craftsmen,
so we always think of ourselves
as software craftsman, that we are
constantly learning every single day.
We are improving our craft.
And so it should be fairly easy to look
backwards on things that we did even
recently, two months ago, four months ago,
six months ago, and be able to say, Hmm,
I could have done that in a better way.
I could have done that in a different way.
And so what the reason why I
bring that up is because in
our lives, in our broad lives.
We have an opportunity
to constantly elevate.
Um, when we think about business as
owners, sometimes we get stuck with,
um, an idea or a strategy or, um, and we
can't quite move forward with it because
we're waiting and we're waiting to see.
well I can't quite do that until this
person does that or a supplier does
this or until the economy is this.
And what that does is that
stagnates the business.
And then next thing you know, none
of those things are quite lining up.
And you can always find a reason
why we're not quite ready yet.
And here we are two, two years later
and we haven't made any improvements
and we haven't learned anything.
And so, uh, we also do that.
Personally in our own lives
is we'll do the same thing and
uh, and we don't move forward.
We should have this
constant movement forward.
And when I say forward,
I mean forward and up.
We're elevating.
And what does elevating look
like, um, for an individual?
Well, We uh, should be able to say similar
to the, the software developer, right?
If I'm not embarrassed.
By the code I wrote six months ago, right.
Then I'm not learning fast enough.
So we could, we could rephrase it if
I'm not embarrassed by the things that
I was doing saying, right, creating the
work that I was producing, the life I
was living five years ago, three years
ago, then I'm not elevating fast enough.
Paul Spencer: And, um, and
you can tell, um, if you, if.
For those who are younger, it's hard
to see the different stages in life,
but as you get older, it's easier
to look backwards and forwards and
see the elevations that you have.
Um, and some of us are blessed to do
that, um, intuitively and maybe on our
own and maybe because of those around us.
Uh, encourage us to elevate.
And so it may not have been intentional,
it may not had, have had the discipline
of improving every day, as they say
in, um, in atomic habits, right?
1% every day.
Um, there might be, might not be that
quite, quite that discipline, um,
but you can look back and you could
see the people in your life and the
environment maybe that you were in.
Helped you to elevate,
to continually elevate.
Um, there are some who are, uh,
look back 10 years, five years,
and they have not elevated at all.
They're not able to, to satisfy the
statement, which says, I'm embarrassed
that what I was doing six months ago.
Six years ago is not any different
than what I'm doing today.
Right.
And I haven't elevated and I haven't
moved forward and I haven't moved up.
And um, so I think this is important
to, um, conceptualize, but it's also
important for us to talk about and to set
things no matter what your age, you have
an opportunity to take this thinking.
Apply it.
So even if you're 70 years old, you
can elevate, even if you're 90 years
old, you can elevate, even if you
are 10 years old, you can elevate.
So there are these different stages in
life, um, where, um, it's important to
do some things, um, while you're younger.
Let's talk about it that way.
I know we've talked about.
Um, in some different newsletters about
the compounding interest and, um, the
opportunity for youngsters, right?
Those that are, um, say between their
teenage years to their mid twenties
to really compound, uh, the learnings
early on so that by the time they're
in their mid thirties to mid forties.
They're really cranking, like the
flywheel is going, um, because of the
opportunities that they've had to learn
and to really compound, right, compound
the interest on those learnings and
really get to a, an awesome place of
wisdom and understanding to apply.
Um, and sometimes, uh, during
those years in the twenties, we
don't really apply ourselves.
We're not really thinking
and learning about life.
So then we don't get the
flywheel until we're say 50.
Or maybe some of us are 60 years old, and
that's not a bad thing necessarily, but
there's a lot of lost opportunity there.
And there's something that, uh, for
those that are older that can give
to, uh, the people who are younger
in your lives, whether that's a son,
daughter, a niece or nephew, right, or
just somebody within your community.
Um, that you can help elevate.
And so what are the things
that we can elevate on?
Well, one of the things I would
say that's really important it,
and it's fairly easy, is to travel.
So some people have never even left their
hometown and is that a terrible thing?
No.
There's a lot of value in having
a, a tight community and living,
um, where you grew up, right?
And, um, and forming a nice.
Uh, family enterprise,
right in that community.
But it's also important to be
able to travel and see different
cultures, different lifestyles,
different environments.
Like, um, um, maybe you grew up in
Nebraska, in the plains, and then you
go out west and you see the mountains.
Um, there's a lot of beauty in our world.
There's a lot of things to be seen.
To be heard, people to interact
with, and there's a lot of
elevation that comes out of that.
So that's a fairly simple one.
Another one that comes
to mind is language.
The more you have the opportunity to
learn other languages, and that doesn't
mean you have to be fluent in five or six
different languages, um, but there's a
lot of things hidden meaning in language.
So you can think about.
Um, Latin, right?
You can think about Spanish,
French, German, right?
Any of those Italian.
Um, there's lots of things, uh,
to be learned, um, by elevating
yourself out of your own comfort
zone, out of your own, uh, way of
speaking or your own way of thinking.
You have to think differently in
order to speak another language.
Um, faith is another thing as you.
As you grow in faith, you see the
world in a different way, and, uh,
you tend to react to things in a
different way and which changes
your emotional quotient, right?
Your eq, um, which is also really
important as you elevate to
elevate your EQ and your faith.
Um, another thing is how you network,
how you, um, what social groups you have,
the social groups you have when you are.
A teenager are likely much
different than the ones that you
have when you're in your fifties.
Um, and hopefully, right?
Um, you have long relationships, long
friendships, but the things that you
talk about, the things that you're up
to, um, hopefully have elevated, right?
Hopefully you're not talking about,
uh, uh, things that you were talking
about when you were a teenager.
In your fifties with your,
with your group, right?
You have elevated in your thinking.
You're elevated in your life and
the purpose that you have around it.
Um, one other thing that I think
is really important too, which
is, um, a big thing for everybody
I would say, is public speaking.
So even if you are, um, a great, um.
Uh, speaker, meaning
you have good charisma.
Uh, you don't really shy away from
getting in front of the group or any
group and, and kind of, um, giving a
presentation or just giving a mini speech.
Um, it doesn't have to be formal, right?
But you don't have any problem
being in front of people.
Um, even those people, even if you, even
if I'm describing you, uh, getting up and.
Uh, preparing for and, um, and
engaging in a, say a keynote speech
where you have, uh, 700, 1800 people
in an audience and you're speaking,
that's much different, right?
Um, and so if you're naturally
really good at it, and you can speak.
In your conference room with your
company, with 20 people in the room,
you can do a boardroom, uh, very easily.
Um, then your elevation is how do I
get in a room with a hundred people?
How do I get in a room with 500 people?
How do I, how do I lock down a
keynote speech at a certain conference
or a certain, um, type of, uh,
um, association or group, right?
That's elevating.
And the reason why we do that.
Um, especially for public speaking,
I think is one of the, I mean, we've
talked about travel and everything else.
Those are important and I think they're
all different pillars, but public
speaking, um, is an elevation step up.
And so for those who are deathly
afraid of getting in front of the
group, even if it's just three people
in the room and they're your friends
and you know them well, and you can't.
Get up and speak in front of them.
Um, any kind of speaking,
uh, will elevate you.
And so maybe it's just two people
in the room, maybe it's five people.
And you're, and you look back and you say,
geez, I can't believe that I had a really
hard time speaking to those, my three
good friends who were business partners.
Excuse me, that were, um, that
was just two years ago and I had
a really difficult time with that.
And now look at me.
I am in front of groups of 20,
very easily having a conversation.
Um, that right there has the
ability to change how you interact
with people individually as
when you have public speaking.
Um, experience.
It changes how you interact with
people on an individual level.
It changes how you think of yourself and
it changes how people observe you as well.
It's a huge, huge thing.
Um, as opposed to just the travel aspect.
Travel, um, is good and
gives you some outside.
Um, outside, um, insight right into how
things are shaped and how people are,
um, public speaking is, is I would say
very important for everybody to do so.
Uh, one other thing I wanted to mention
was just, um, what I call the different
stares of life for the life brackets.
And so I'm just gonna run
through these real quick.
I don't really have
talking points around them.
I'm gonna read them.
I have them right in front of me here.
So, um.
Some of those life brackets, and
these are the ones that I made up.
So these aren't scientific or
anything, but, um, from the day you
were born until you're about seven
years old, is one stare of life.
And we can think about these, I think
as I kind of go through these, um,
you can think about it and reflect
on your own life and kinda go
backwards, say, yeah, I had a stare,
um, in my life around that time.
And it would be thoughtful and
useful, I would say, is to say, why
did you have a stare at that time?
Like, what was different about you?
Um, from five years old
to 30 years old, right?
That's very extreme.
Right.
But we'll go through these and
that's, I think it's helpful
for you to think about that.
And then it's also helpful for
you to, to maybe project, um,
maybe a grandkid or a neighbor.
Um, or maybe a niece, nephew, maybe
a, a son or daughter, um, in these
brackets and think about how are you
applying, um, some stairs right in
their lives so that they are capable of
stepping up, right, of elevating, um.
And, uh, like a phrase that we have
in our house is, Hey, you're, you're,
you're a, you're an eighth grader, right?
You're a, you're a sixth grader now,
you're a, um, and sometimes the, the
kids can't quite conceptualize what
that means, um, because they're,
uh, they're only 10 years old.
They're only nine years old.
They're only 13 years old.
So it's important for us to be
able to understand what we're up
to with them to help them elevate.
Because they're not going
to do it on their own.
So anyway, some of those life brackets
are from when you're born to around seven,
from eight until 12, and then you become
a teenager, and now you're 13 to 17.
And then 18 is when you graduate 18 to 25.
So if you go to college, it's
normally your college years
are just out of college years.
If you don't go to college,
you are entering life.
Um.
Uh, regardless if you go to
college, you're entering life.
You're, you're leaving your parents home,
you're getting a job, you're, you're
responsible for yourself, and it's the
first time likely that you're doing that.
26 to 35 is you're in your career.
Um, it's the really most important
part of your career where you're really
learning quickly and a lot, probably
starting a family in that timeframe.
36 to 50.
That's the time where you are
likely established in a career.
Um, you likely have a family or you at
least, um, have grown into a family.
And, um, that's what they say.
That 36 to 50 is the time where
you are most productive and where
you will make most of your wealth.
Right?
51 to 63, 64 to 75, and then 76 to 99.
And those are the stages in life.
And that doesn't mean, I think a
lot of times we've, we've talked
about this before too, um, which
is, uh, at that 51 to 63, right?
I'm preparing for, for my retirement.
And when I hit 63, I retire.
And, um, and unfortunately
there's no more elevation.
And so a lot of people stop,
take their last stare at 63.
And some people, if they retire
early, maybe even earlier,
and then they stop elevating.
And I think that's, um, a disservice to
yourself, a disservice to your family.
Um, and I would say as well is a
dis disservice to God and to Jesus.
So there's a lot more to, to do in your
life, a lot more to give once you retire.
And you can always
constantly be elevating.
So think about that.
Um, very fun topic.
I think, uh, there's a million different
things that you can apply in your own
life, um, how you want to elevate in your
own life, uh, within your own family.
And, uh, yeah.
So that's fun.
We'll chat with you later.
Thanks.