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You Can Mentor is a network that equips and encourages mentors and mentoring leaders through resources and relationships to love God, love others, and make disciples in their own community. We want to see Christian mentors thrive.
We want to hear from you! Send any mentoring questions to hello@youcanmentor.com, and we'll answer them on our podcast. We want to help you become the best possible mentor you can be. Also, if you are a mentoring organization, church, or non-profit, connect with us to join our mentoring network or to be spotlighted on our show.
Please find out more at www.youcanmentor.com or find us on social media. You will find more resources on our website to help equip and encourage mentors. We have downloadable resources, cohort opportunities, and an opportunity to build relationships with other Christian mentoring leaders.
You can mentor is a podcast about the power of building relationships with kids from hard places in the name of Jesus. Every episode will help you overcome common mentoring obstacles and give you the confidence you need to invest into the lives of others. Find out more at youcanmentor.com or find us on social media, you can mentor
Speaker 2:What up, mentors? Today on the podcast, we're joined by Ron DeVries, youth and emerging adults ministry consultant with Thrive Ministries of the Christian Reformed Church in North America. Ron has spent over three decades investing into the next generation serving churches all across The US and Canada by helping them build thriving intergenerational communities. He's one of the leaders behind Generation Spark, a creative mentoring initiative that pairs older adults with young people to work on real projects, share their stories, discover how God is at work in both generations. Ron's passion is to help churches move from ministering to young people to ministering with them, creating spaces where relationships and discipleship happen naturally.
Speaker 2:He's also the host of the spark dialogue podcast. Check that out wherever you get your pods, where he engages leaders and innovators in conversations about how the church can bridge generational gaps and ignite meaningful connections between people of all ages. This conversation with Ron is surely going to encourage you. Please share it with your staff, your team, your volunteers. Ron is full of wisdom, great stories, and I promise he will make you a better mentor.
Speaker 2:Tune in, share it, give us that five star. We're thankful you can mentor. Welcome to the You Can Mentor podcast. This is your tallest mentoring friend, Zach Garza, and I am here with my friend Ron. Ron, say hi.
Speaker 3:Hey. Hello, everyone. My name is Ron DeFries.
Speaker 2:Ron, you are my first guest from Canada. So congratulations. I mean, we are going international here. I mean, I don't know if you can call it international. Can you call it international, Ron?
Speaker 3:You know, I I struggle with that term when it comes to US and Canadian relations and and traveling abroad because my work is really two nation. Right? I work in The US, and I work in Canada extensively, in terms of of some of the support in terms of of youth ministry and and mentoring as we're gonna jump into. So I don't see it as international. I see it as a friendly neighbor, and I'm hoping the rest of your audience can hear that too, that we're friendly neighbors working together for the kingdom.
Speaker 2:Oh, man. Well, I am here with my neighbor, Ron, and I'm excited to talk about mentoring. Man, guys, Ron is a stud. I have I guess I met Ron probably six or so months ago, and I just love the work that he's doing. He's he's involved with a whole host of stuff, and it all has has to do with mentoring, youth, relationships, all of that jazz.
Speaker 2:It's good stuff. So, Ron, why don't you just start out by telling us just a tiny bit about yourself and who you are and what it is you do?
Speaker 3:Yeah. Thanks, Zach. I'm gonna go not way far back, but I'll just kind of in this context right now, I'm I'm Ron DeVries. I live just outside of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. So for those of you who are wondering where that might be in terms of The US context, kinda North Of Montana.
Speaker 3:And we are on the East Side Of The Rocky Mountains. Love this part of the world and love living here close to our kids. We have two kids, a girl and a boy. They're both married, and we've got three grandkids. Just I'll tell you, Zach, this is a wonderful part of life.
Speaker 3:I don't know if if any of your listeners are are grandparents, but it is kind of a fun stage of life, and we're really enjoying it. My work is with the Christian Reformed Church in North America, specifically, with a ministry called Thrive. Been there for a number of years, I would say, with the Christian Reformed Church in a denominational setting since about 2017, regionally supporting youth ministry in Alberta, Northern Alberta, since 02/2007. But overall, doing pieces of youth ministry, whether volunteer or either an amateur status or in a professional status for about thirty plus years. Love this ministry, and really, really enjoy the the relational part of of ministry, but also, the nuances and the big pieces of what ministry looks like as we do it together, do it well for the kingdom.
Speaker 3:Did you want me to jump into the generation spark piece right now and explain a little bit about that, or do you wanna wait with that, Zach?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Sure, man. Let's, let's go with
Speaker 3:it. Perfect. So probably about six years ago, I I met a gentleman who was introduced to me back in Grand Rapids, sorry, in Holland, Michigan, a gentleman by the name of Virgil Gulker. He was part of a research working group with young adults, emerging adults, who are looking at why young people seem to be leaving the church, Zach. And the work was really important, and they through a Lilly funded support grant, a supporting grant, they launched a pilot project called Spark.
Speaker 3:And of Generation Spark, the idea behind it was how do we create relational connections between an older person and a younger person that they can walk in faith together during the faith formative lives of the younger person's life. And that was the intent, right, to to create a relational connection. That would be a blessing to the church moving forward, but also a blessing to them as as two individuals. And what they did was they they experimented with it for a period of time. Virgil told me about it, and our partner denomination, which is the Reformed Church in America, was also made aware of this this good, good work.
Speaker 3:And we were there listening to the pilot stories, Zach. There were some really good takeaways that were being learned and expressed through this this beautiful thing called mentoring. And so what they did was, over time, they had they had gone about as far as they could with this this pilot. And then they reached out to our two two two denominations, the Christian Reformed Church in North America, and the Reformed Church in America. And they said, listen.
Speaker 3:We'd love for you two to partner together and take this to your congregations in North America to be a teaching tool to help the congregations move past a silo mindset of ministry and to more of an intergenerational, deeper depth connection between younger people and older people within the church, to create lasting relationships that last beyond the time that they go to university or college or some sort of a vocational space, but that this could be a lifelong relationship together. And so what they created was the tool and the infrastructure to, to help the churches, lean into that. When we took it on, we looked at it, and we said, this is really good stuff, but let's see let's let's see if we can find a proof that this works. And so we took it, Zach, to a number of, trusted networked people throughout our two denominations and said, try it. Use it.
Speaker 3:Help us understand what it's doing and and what are some of the changes that we need to make. And it was through that process or process for our US friends that we we started to see where, we needed to fill in some gaps. And so it was from that time then we started, honing it, really synchronizing it to to be the connection, you know, for our two denominations when it comes to intergenerational relationships within the church. But what was really interesting about this, Zach, as we went through the learning, as we went through the stages of discernment, and we did a ton of prayer around this, because honestly, this doesn't happen unless God's leading the way in this. Right?
Speaker 3:Because we've looked at this from a research perspective. We've looked at this from Scripture. What does Scripture teach us about mentoring and discipleship? And it's right there. We know that.
Speaker 3:But how do we live into that? And what was fascinating about what are some of our findings were was this. As much as it helped the young person, it probably equally helped the older person. And that was rich and so, so helpful for us, because we realized we were trying to deal with the situation in the church of the young people leaving, but we were also and this was, like I said, a great learning for us, we were realizing that this was having an impact on the older generation about being part of the body and using their gifts for something more than, than maybe they even imagined. And so that was really cool, and that was a significant learning for us.
Speaker 3:But in all that, you know, we're still trying to take this to the local churches and to help them understand what it means to, be a faithful follower of Jesus Christ and walk with our young people, through their own faith formation journeys. So I'll just pause there for a minute, Zach. Is that helpful to to give you a kind of a sense of of where we've come from a little bit with with some of our work and my connection to the church?
Speaker 2:Yeah, Ron. I mean, it's it's super helpful, and it and it is it is shocking to me how obvious this is. Right? Like, there are there are young people out there who need mentors, who need people to teach them how to fulfill their potential, whether that's through academics or through their faith or through just anything that they're passionate about. And that is how we become all that we're meant to all that we're meant to be is because we have an older person, whether it's a parent or a grandparent or a teacher or a coach or a mentor who identifies gifts in us and then creates an environment to help cultivate those so that we can become all that God asked for us.
Speaker 2:And yet, for some reason, the church that is filled with older people and people who are younger, we have such a hard time connecting older people to younger people to build relationships that will benefit both. And I in some ways, I'm shocked and surprised of why this is so difficult. And then in some ways, I'm like, man, this is such a work of the enemy because it makes too much sense. Right?
Speaker 3:Absolutely. And here's the thing. You know, you you touched on something that was, we identify in our teaching, in our resource, the research that's come, over the last number of years. So let's say the last decade. We could go even further because Christian Smith talks about this in soul searching, the importance of relational connections.
Speaker 3:Right? Because, I mean, there's just too many, and you named it. The enemy is is is creating all kinds of roadblocks or trying to put up roadblocks, to to prevent these kinds of thing these kind of relationships from from being strong and deepening and really seeing Christ in those places. But it was interesting because Fuller has touched on this many, many times. Right?
Speaker 3:Their work in, you know, beginning with sticky faith really touches on the five to one ratio. Right? And and really what that is, is that, turning the model upside down, moving from one leader to supporting and equipping and walking with five young people. We're saying now, let's get five spiritually mature people walking with that one person because that's how important it is. Right?
Speaker 3:And, of course, we get churches saying, that's a lot of work. And we said, yes, it is. But it's important work. It's vital work for the church, and we have to step up in this place. So that's a sticky faith work.
Speaker 3:I mean, growing young talks about it. The growing with material that came from Steve argue and Tara Powell, they name it. They name it as an integral part of the faith formation journey from, early adolescence to, adolescence to, to people, you know, emerging adults. And so even in that space, you know, we're recognizing the important work of the church that's needed to to, to be that spiritual encourager, if you will. There was a great piece of research, Zach, that came out of Canada back.
Speaker 3:I think the first part of this research came out of the University of Lethbridge. I I I I'm pretty sure that's where it was called Henringing Faith. And what they were looking at was the the condition of the church when it comes to nurturing and bringing up our young people in the church. And they were recognizing that we there was this little literal hemorrhaging of the church that was happening, that a lot of these young people were not feeling connected to the church for a variety of reasons. And one of those main reasons was because of their relational connections or lack thereof.
Speaker 3:There was a follow-up report that came out of the University of Ottawa. Doctor Rick Hemster was part of that, and that was called Renegotiating Faith. And that came out in about 2019. In my conversations with Rick and others who have engaged with this material, They literally name mentoring as a key component of maintaining connection to a younger person, as they're moving from, the secondary high stage of life. So high school age group.
Speaker 3:And so let's say 17, 18 years old to when they move on to a different stage of life. And there was a significant, a significant percentage of students who felt connected to the body when they had someone walking with them during that stage of life. And they actually named four categories that were important for the mentor and the mentee. I'll just highlight a couple. One was the one you named.
Speaker 3:It was about calling out or seeing what God has placed in their life and naming that for them. The other piece that has been significant in the life of church, specifically, one that, keeps resonating with Mesach, is this idea of, and Rick talks about this in his report that, we tend to do these starts and stops of programming within the body and life of the church. And within those starts and stops, you start to have starts and stops with relationships with people. And there isn't a long time of connection between those people. And so with that, experience these gaps along the way.
Speaker 3:Mentoring, when it begins early enough in the life of a student, creates continuity. So as they go through those ups and downs of the starts and the stops of their own programmatic, faith formation life, span, if they have continuity in their life, that helps them navigate those those highs and those lows. And when they then move past, that that high school age or 17 or 18 going into that next stage of life, when they may start living on their own, or may being away from the home, that there's still this person that's investing in them, that's caring for them, and praying for them, and being present for them. That was a huge takeaway.
Speaker 2:Well, Ron, and that's when it goes from being the church for me, a church Yeah. To being the church. That is that is when that young person who comes home to visit, they don't say, I'm gonna go to so and so church. They say, I'm gonna go see Ron. I'm gonna go see Zach at church.
Speaker 2:And that is why mentoring at its very foundation is all about relationships.
Speaker 3:Yes. Yes.
Speaker 2:And this is how God made it. And this is what's so crazy. If if churches can rally around this this, group of young people, and if they can say, hey. Our focus is to disciple these young peoples to help them experience Jesus, help them fulfill their potential, and help them go out into the world and try to make an impact in his name, then the church finds purpose. The church works together.
Speaker 2:They they get more energy. They get more momentum because they're working together unified towards something. And that is what gives a church life. And a and a church that has life is so attractive. It's so fun.
Speaker 2:And people will say all day, well, these young people, they just done a and I'm like, you're not hanging out with the young people that I'm hanging out with because they are hungry for older adults to vulnerably and authentically live life with them, to show up, to speak, to ask good kinds of questions, and just to give them value and worth. And so, man, it it it is. It's all about relationships that that don't come and go, but that are steady in good times and and in bad. So
Speaker 3:It's interesting you said what you did about purpose. And you didn't say mission, but but I could sense that in what you were saying. And so that was yeah. And that was really vital. And and for me, that goes back to some of Fuller's good work, which is looking at these three big questions that young people ask.
Speaker 3:Right? Who am I? Where do I fit? And what's my purpose? And what do you think about those identity belonging and and purpose questions?
Speaker 3:That's that's a really big deal. And when the church is not there to help them answer those questions, they're gonna be looking somewhere else. And so when we think about a mentor mentee relationship, oftentimes, there's gonna be questions like, I'm trying to figure out what I'm gonna do with the rest of my life. I mean, you and I, we probably have landed a few times on what I was gonna do with the rest of my life. But you know what?
Speaker 3:It was really, really helpful for me when I had somebody that I could bounce those ideas off of. A trusted advisor, somebody who who kinda knows me, or or really does know me, and maybe sees, like you said, sees what God has placed inside, and is calling out. You know, there's a couple of key passages that we often use when we talk about generation spark, when we talk about intergenerational ministry. And the one that to me just really kind of highlights this for us a little bit is the relationship between Tim and Timothy and Paul. Right?
Speaker 3:And in second Timothy, near the beginning of that letter, you know, Paul is writing to Timothy and says, I'm reminded of, of your own faith journey, you know, from your mother and your grandmother. And I pray that is also in you now. And then he continues to say things like, I I encourage you to fan into frame this gift that God has given you. You. Because my sense is in this letter that he was, he was sensing that Tim was in a bit of a quandary, maybe a wrestling within his own life and ministry.
Speaker 3:And Paul's just saying, no, no, no, no, no, God has called you to this purpose. I see this in you. I'm calling it out again, because the elders, lay their hands on you as we all did as you were commissioned to do this good work. But I know there's going be struggles ahead. We just encourage you to faint into flame this gift that God has given you and never forget who you are.
Speaker 3:And that to me reminds me again of that incredible text, which reminds us of that importance again, going all the way back to the Old Testament. Go back to Deuteronomy six, the Shema, which which says, the Lord, our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength. And these commands that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Talk about them when you sit down and when you get up.
Speaker 3:I then and and and the text goes on and on, but really at its heart, and this is the interesting part of this, and I'm not sure everybody gets this. Moses was preaching to the congregation at that moment. He was preaching to the entirety of Israel and saying, this is your community calling. This is the thing that you are called to live out as an expression of that faith formation journeying alongside with our young people as they grow up, whether they're children or younger people or going even into university and college, that we continue to lean into that recognition of who we are, which are children of God, and the children of the resurrected Jesus Christ, the empty tomb, the hope. And we need to remind our our people of that.
Speaker 3:We need to remind our kids of that. We need to remind each other that that we are his beloved, and you are seen as His beloved. We did a mission trip this summer with an organization called There For Go Ministries, which I'm also part of. And the theme this year was and these writers did a beautiful job with it, broken and beautiful. And this idea then that we are broken in so many ways, and yet God takes these fragments of our brokenness and creates something beautiful for the kingdom.
Speaker 3:And that's what we all are, but we we can't do this on our own. We're we're doing this together to to really dive into what that means moving forward. And Christ with us, is is that beautiful expression of living into, what it means to be broken and beautiful for the kingdom. And and I I think that's part of our called work, Zach, is to to remind our churches, remind our mentors, that this is a part important part of our calling, not just as individuals, but as a community of faith.
Speaker 2:Man, Rob, that's so good. Absolutely love that. So so as as we start talking about intergenerational ministry and if people out there, you know, running, mentoring, not for profits, churches, after school programs, One question that everyone asked me is, Zach, where are the volunteers? I can't find any volunteers. And in my opinion, I'm like, man, there there there's gotta be a ripe harvest for the older generation who are maybe finishing up their workforce.
Speaker 2:They don't have kids. They have more margin. They have wisdom. But no one has really seemed to under to figure out how to maximize that kind of field. So just in in your work, tell me just what are some of the things that you've seen that have worked well when you're trying to engage the the older generation to build relationships with some of the younger generations?
Speaker 3:That's a good question. And I would say a very timely one, Zach, because I think we as congregations of faith churches throughout North America and organizations, if you will, are struggling with people stepping up. And there's a variety of reasons for that. We we don't have to go too deep into the why. It just is.
Speaker 3:But one of the experiences that we've learned, and I'll go with two examples. One is from the generation spark world, and the second example will be my own personal ministry world. I'll start with the generation spark world. One of the things that we've noticed and people will come to us, churches will come to us and say, how do we get people saying yes? How do we get people stepping into this?
Speaker 3:And what are the practices we encourage churches to do when they step into this world of learning about intergenerational mentoring? Is this, we said, don't lean on you asking the adults to step in. Say, ask the students who they would like to have walk with them. Because there might be persons in the congregation that they already maybe have a relationship that's beginning to flourish a little bit, but they want to spend more time with them, they just don't know how to do that. And so, when we talk to the churches, because the churches say, how do we get our leaders and volunteers to do this?
Speaker 3:It begins with I say, listen to the young people's voices, and say, who do you want to be connected with more intentionally? And when that happens, most times, 99.9% of the time, the adult will not say no. And that's a big deal. Right? When these young people are asking for you, that there there's a reason for that.
Speaker 3:So that's been one experience that we've learned with the generation spark model. I would say with my own ministry model, within my own ministry, it's not a model, but within my own ministry over the decades, one of the things that I've leaned into a lot actually do this kind of reverse mentoring. When I have a person that I'm thinking I want to have engaged more, I lean into their own, what I see in them. I begin with saying, Hey, listen, Zach, I've seen one that you're super, super tall, and you love playing basketball. And so you know, what would it look like for you to engage with a couple of young people, you know, maybe once every couple of weeks just to have some connection with them?
Speaker 3:Is that something that might interest you? And if so, maybe we can talk a little bit more about that. Finding a way to use their gifts and skills to encourage them to be used for something. And generally, again, I'm not going say 99% of the time, but I would say at least 80 to 85% of the time, if they know what the purpose is, and they know where their skill set could be used for the kingdom, that goes a long way because if I've learned anything about asking volunteers to help in something, the most of the time they will say no because they don't know what they're signing up for. And so be clear.
Speaker 3:Give them kind of a a set kind of list of expectations. Maybe begin simple. But the reality is when they have a personal invitation, I see this in you prefaced by it, that makes a big, big difference for them. And that has been my experience that people will generally respond well. And if they say no, it could be for a valid reason, and that's okay.
Speaker 3:But I do know that when we speak heart to heart, and they recognize that there's an authenticness to the to the request, typically don't have a problem with them saying they they usually say yes.
Speaker 2:Boy, and and that's so smart, Ron. Like and I'm sitting here thinking of all the times I just post something on Instagram. I'm like, we need mentors. Come all. Right.
Speaker 2:And then I get mad because people don't show up. And I'm just like, oh, okay. Zach, let's take a step back. That's pretty lazy. Is there a better way that I can do that?
Speaker 2:And, man, what yes. This takes effort. Yes. This takes time. But if I came to you and I was like, hey, Ron.
Speaker 2:Look, man. I think you're great. And I just admire you and all of the work that you've done. And I just love the fact that you, you know, are such a good leader and you, you know, write and you speak and you've got all these different kinds of connections, and you love to develop leaders. Man man, I've got this group of kids, and they really could use someone to develop them as leaders.
Speaker 2:Is there any chance you could come for forty five minutes on a Monday night and just share with them just a little bit of what you've learned over the past thirty years of doing what you're
Speaker 3:that's a different ask. Right? Totally different ask.
Speaker 2:And and that is an ask that's gonna, one, make them feel seen, two, make them feel honored, and three, give them an invitation to use their god given gifts and experiences to help others experience Jesus.
Speaker 3:Exactly. Exactly. And, you know, as you were describing that invitation to me, I was ready to sign up right there. Now that's maybe not I don't know if that's a a good thing to add to my plate, but but, you know, there was there was this this element that I thought, yeah, this is a captivating vision casting. I wanna get on board kind of thing that that was ex I was experiencing in that moment.
Speaker 3:And so I I that's the important piece. We have in churches, and this is just my experience, maybe in your context a little bit different. The Instagram piece is really interesting because I I see that as the old bulletin. Right? The church bulletin that you used to get on Sunday mornings.
Speaker 3:And if you saw that invitation in the bulletin, you'd say, yeah. And then gloss over it, and then it's sitting there, for the rest of the week, and you don't think about it again until somebody calls you on the phone or you have a conversation, over a coffee to say, hey. Listen. I'm thinking about this, and lay it out for them. And more cases than not, they will say yes.
Speaker 3:But as you said, Zach, it takes time. It takes energy. And sometimes I think in our churches, we are tired. And I think that's been the thing that we've been running into a lot lately. Whether it's a tiredness of coming out of a lockdown or tiredness from relaunching ministry or tiredness just because we've got a lot going on in our lives.
Speaker 3:The simple fact, and this is, a term that, I've heard other people use, and I've used it from time to time, where we can just show up and be a ministry of presence, that goes a long way. We're asking you to just be. And that's a huge, huge deal in the life of a young person. And when we do that, when the first time we do that, we start to understand and see why this is such an important part of the ministry plan that God has enacted for us. And I guess that's the call for all the listeners today as well.
Speaker 3:What would it take for you all to to just show up for a young person? For whether it's forty five minutes for the group and sharing your story or maybe doing something else, playing basketball. I'm I'm a hockey player, for in Canada. And, you know, I I love I love that that part of my life that I can do this. And and one of the early ministry things that I began to do when I was doing the regional work in Northern Alberta back in 02/2007, I just gathered some young people together, some young adults, and I said, let's just play hockey together.
Speaker 3:And I I did that for fifteen years. These guys, and girls showed up, then they would come together. And, it was relationship building. It was camaraderie on the bench. It was a fellowship together in a in a just a different setting.
Speaker 3:And it got to the point where, you know, some of those relationships became deep, and and some of these guys, you know, say, hey, Ron. You're like a pastor to us. Can you do our wedding? Can you do right. And these kind of things start showing up.
Speaker 3:And that doesn't happen unless we take that first step of of being able to show up with them, to be with them, to journey with them. And it could be sport. It could be other things. And that's really the heart of generation spark. It's it's about finding something that the two people can work on together.
Speaker 3:A shared passion for something. A project is the way we describe it. And we give you the tools to, to to lean into rolling this out. What what does the gospel tell us about this project that we're working on? What are some of the things that we're learning together that we can bring to our community, our church to learn about, etcetera, etcetera.
Speaker 3:So it's coming together for a shared purpose, understanding our our shared identity in Christ, and then working towards something that we can share with a broader audience to say, this is where we saw Christ show up in the midst of what we are learning together. The other last thing that I'll I'll say about generation spark that I think is really important for us in this conversation. And for those people who are listening that have been mentored and it wasn't a good experience for you, because there seem to be this this hierarchical space, what we encourage is that there is no hierarchy. That is a reciprocal learning space. That you guys, girls together, are learning how to how to figure this out together.
Speaker 3:There isn't one that's smarter than the other. It is about this this equilibrium of learning space. Sure. One may bring more years of experience, and one may actually bring more other experiences to to the conversation. But it's it's about coming together for one, and being willing to be vulnerable and learning together.
Speaker 3:And when at the end of the day, and this is our hope with with these mentoring relationships, that this doesn't end after 12 meetings. This doesn't end after one season. That this begins a lifelong relationship. That that both people will see and feel as just an encouraging, support for one another in their own, in each other faith journey lives.
Speaker 2:Think that's so important, Ron. I mean, you mentioned earlier five people. Right? Yeah. And so me and my family moved.
Speaker 2:You know, we moved down here to Waco, Texas from the great city of Dallas in 02/2021. And, you know, I had a bunch of mentors up there, and I I had this one guy named Scott Frost. And Scott was you know, he was a part of my board. And, I mean, I talked to Scott often, like, for sure every week and just a great mentor. And and, I mean, ever since I moved, you know, the first couple years, we would talk every couple weeks.
Speaker 2:We talk every month. Now it's turned into once every, you know, two or three months. But he called me yesterday. Man, it was the first time I probably talked to him in four months. And just when his name popped up on my phone, I was right in the middle of work.
Speaker 2:I was busy, but I looked down, and I just got the ceiling. And I was like, man, there's nothing that I there's nothing that I would rather do than answer this call right now. And so I picked it up, and we had a conversation for probably half an hour. It was so encouraging. And that that was the best part of my day.
Speaker 2:And as I think back about that, I'm like, man, Scott and I's relationship has had seasons. We've had those times whenever we were side by side. We were talking every week, and then we had a second season where we were talking every month, and now we only talk every so often. But that doesn't change the fact that we're still in relationship together. And I hope that for as long as we're on this earth, we're consistently talking.
Speaker 2:And when my name pops up on his phone or when his name pops up on my phone, it reminds me of the kindness of God. And it reminds me that I'm not alone. And it reminds me that there's someone out there who cares about me, who has faith in me, who supports me. And that right there is of the utmost of value. Because when people stick around for the long haul, when people believe in you, when people will show up for the good times and in the hard times, I mean, you can't put a price tag on that, Ron.
Speaker 2:I mean, it is And that's generational. Like, my kids are different because of Scott's investment in my life, and my and their kids will be different because their dad was different because of his mentor. And, man, if that's not kingdom, I don't know what is. So I love that story.
Speaker 3:But this just happened yesterday. That is so so timeless. That's been my experience as well. I I mean, I've had a number of people in my life who have been mentors to me, that I still maintain connection with. And that's that's my hope for our our our younger generation and even older generations, that they can experience that beautiful, beautiful kingdom picture within their own lives.
Speaker 3:That they can be encouraged, as they journey this earth, you know, with somebody who genuinely cares for them, who loves them. And through the good times and the bad times, can feel that support and encouragement in those places. That that is so so beautiful. And my yeah. And that would be that would be my prayer, is that the people that are listening, can experience that for themselves as well.
Speaker 2:Man, Ron, we just have just a couple couple more more minutes here. Is or are there any tips that you would have for someone who is older and maybe becoming a mentor or someone who is trying to recruit someone to invest into intergenerational kind of ministry? Just do do you have any things off of the top of your head to share to kinda help us execute that well?
Speaker 3:Yeah. So, there's a couple things I recommend to churches when we talk about these kinds of things. First one would be, a breakout of your clicks and actually have conversations with young people. People. And so try to find ways to do that.
Speaker 3:That's not easy, but it means moving away from our our comfort zones sometimes. Because let's face it. We we like our comfort spaces, but I think it's really, really important for us to to break away from those things a little bit. I am gonna recommend a couple resources, if that would be helpful, that we could point people towards. The renegotiating faith report, I hope you can put a link in your, once this is broadcast that people can read it because I think that would be really helpful.
Speaker 3:The other thing, and that was interesting. You talked about the conversation. And that's the one thing we're hoping for is that, people will have a continuing conversation. There's a great resource developed, I think I think he's one of the founders of this ministry called Axis, and and they actually focus on really helping families and churches to have one conversation, a never ending conversation. Because one of the things we don't wanna do is stop the conversation.
Speaker 3:And so they also are a great resource for some of these things as well. And I would say too, spend some time looking at, your own life and maybe ask this question. Who was someone in your life that stepped up for you when you were maybe feeling out of sorts or maybe, walked with you through a period of time, that really highlights the things that Zach and I that you and I have been talking about. Because one of the things we don't do often enough is pause to reflect on, some of those people that have been those people in our lives for us and to name them. And what was something that was important to us in this?
Speaker 3:And in our generation spark calls, we, do some of our promotional webinars, we ask everybody that question. Who was somebody that stepped into the gaps for you? Who was somebody that walked with you? So I encourage you all to maybe just take a moment, to to think about, to pray about who was that person for me. Who was that person that cared for me and walked with me during a a time in my life that I say that was a that was a venture for us for me.
Speaker 2:Man, I'm gonna push that just a tad bit further on. If you're a mentor listening to this and if there's a kid or a young adult that you were once really, really close with that you haven't talked to in a while Mhmm. Maybe an encouragement, just pick up the phone and give them a call. Give them a voice memo. Give them a text.
Speaker 2:Just do something to let them know that you're still thinking about them, that you still care about them, that they still have a spot in your heart. Man, that's that's so powerful. So Thanks for naming that. I I love that.
Speaker 3:I'm gonna do that right after this call as well because I think that's just that is just so rich.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Thanks, Zach. Man, Ron, thank you so much for taking time out, and I just absolutely love all that you're doing, generational spark and with the reformed church and youth ministry and with your ministry, that's called Thrive. And just really appreciate your wisdom and your stories and taking time out to share all those things with us today. My pleasure, Zach.
Speaker 2:And, let me
Speaker 3:know if I can, come back or or we can talk again. I'd be happy to do that. And, if you ever wanna jump into our podcast, which is Spark Dialogue, I'd love for you to join us for that as well.
Speaker 2:Yes, Ron. I wanna do that. So Alright. Sounds good. Alright, guys.
Speaker 2:Hey. Well, thanks so much for tuning in to the You Can Mentor podcast with my neighbor, Ron. And Yeah. Hope that you picked up lots of good stuff. And remember, You Can Mentor.
Speaker 1:Thanks for tuning in to the you can mentor podcast. Our vision is to raise up and invest in mentoring leaders who will launch and grow thriving mentoring ministries. We do that by equipping and encouraging faith based leaders through relational connection, Christ centered resources and collaborative gatherings. Check out our books, come to the National Christian Mentoring Gathering and engage with our network and cohorts. You can find all this at ucanmentor.com or on social Please
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