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A podcast that holds horror to standards horror never agreed to. Hosts Jeremy Whitley, Ben Kahn, Emily Martin and guests watch, read, listen to, and check out movies, tv shows, comics, books, art and anything else from the horror genre and discuss it through a progressive lens. We'll talk feminism in horror, LGBTQ+ issues and representation in horror, racial and social justice in horror, disability and mental health/illness in horror, and the work of female and POC directors, writers, and creators in horror.
We're the podcast horror never agreed to take part in.
Emily: the storms coming.
Ben: You know, I remember when my
primary personality trait wasn't tired.
I miss that.
Emily: It's weird.
Like, every so often there's a
moment in the morning where I'm like,
I am awake and inspired and then
Ben: Should we do the intro
and start our rankings?
Jeremy: Yeah, let's do the thing.
Ben: Let's fight as we apply numerical
rankings to subjective works of art!
Jeremy: Good evening and welcome to
Progressively Horrified, the podcast
where we old horde to progressive
standards it never agreed to.
Tonight Another year has come and gone.
It's just after Halloween for us
as we sit down to discuss this,
but it's after New Year's for
you, so good for you, you made it.
Guys, it's the third anniversary show
and we are here to rank some movies.
Now we have our big list on Letterboxd
that we're going to be adding them to.
You can pull it up or
be in the show notes.
It's on our website.
It's wherever you want to find it.
I am your host, Jeremy Whitley,
and with me tonight, I have a
panel of cinephiles and cenobites.
First, they're here to challenge
the sexy werewolf, sexy vampire
binary, my co host, Ben Kahn!
Ben, how are you tonight?
Ben: ready to fight about art!
Jeremy: Did you think we
would make it this far?
Ben: I did it but I'm so happy we did
because I love you both so dang much!
Jeremy: Aww,
same.
Ben: Turns out I love having an
excuse to watch spooky movies
and talk to y'all every week.
Jeremy: yeah, I mean, if nothing else,
watching all the movies that I watched
in October and not having you guys to
discuss them with every week with all the
ones I watched, reminded me how much I
value this, because there were a couple of
movies in there that I just, I felt like
I really needed to talk to somebody about.
Ben: There's so many
Jeremy: doesn't want to hear it.
Ben: There's so many movies that
we watch, and my reaction is like,
Damn, sure, I need to talk about
this at length for several hours.
Jeremy: Yeah,
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: this is what this is for!
A lot
Jeremy: And our co host, the cinnamon
roll of Cenobites, Emily Martin.
Emily, you came one week to talk
about the Babadook with us, and
we haven't let you leave yet.
How are you feeling tonight?
Emily: I'm very grateful that you
have provided me with my soapbox
that you're here to listen to me.
I know you are true friends and allies
especially anime that you have watched.
That I have inflicted upon
you and you're still my friend
and we are still doing this.
So, you know, people out there, listeners
out there, get you some friends that
will watch all of Evangelion for your
birthday and actually talk about it.
And
Jeremy: you share your,
your wild theories and,
um, have, have some
strange ones of their own.
Have the worst opinions I appreciate
that I have, I have opinions about
Evangelion that people who love
Evangelion really dislike, so.
Emily: well, I think everyone who has
an opinion about Evangelion dislikes
other people's opinions about Evangelion.
So.
Jeremy: Part of the, part
of being in the club.
Yeah.
Ben: that just kind of this churning
maelstrom of conflicting ideas,
until all that I can really vocalize
is, I like when they did the
synchronized movement, that was fun!
They did the dance dance together,
and that makes my monkey brain happy.
Emily: would publish papers,
but then I know that that would
not satisfy my Dark Passenger my
Ben: Love that Dexter reference
you just slid up in there.
Emily: Thank you.
Jeremy: Yeah.
So, uh, to remind people on this list
we do it every year for our anniversary.
We have, we only list the movies.
We don't try to rank TV shows.
So we will not be at length
attempting to rank Evangelion
amongst the films we've talked about.
Although I'm sure that
would be a show all itself.
Ben: it would be yellow.
It would just be us fighting for an
hour over yellow jackets in Evangelion.
Jeremy: Absolutely.
now going into tonight we have
103 horror movies on the list
already from our past two years.
Our top five right now from the last
couple years are number one, get out.
Number two, the Baba Duke.
Number three, the thing
number four, attack the block.
And number five, aliens.
Really solid films, and
I think really, the top
ten are pretty solid
Ben: I feel very strong
about that top five.
I don't know if anything's gonna
crack the top five this year.
Like, we watched some great ones,
but that top five is fucking strong.
A
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: Almost just as unassailable
are our bottom five which start with
Right now, uh, 99 is The Craft Legacy
a movie with so much potential and
so little delivery No Face Benny,
somehow a movie that doesn't, in
which nothing happens, it's only
about 10 minutes, but still, nothing
happens in 10 minutes Resident Evil,
Welcome to Raccoon City, a movie Hey.
A remake so bad it was actually worse
than the original Resident Evil,
remarkably.
Ben: So bad, it made me question
if I even like this series at all.
Jeremy: And of course M.
Night Shyamalan's crowning masterpiece,
Old about the beach that makes you old.
Ben: We do have a Shyamalan movie
that will avoid being in the top 5.
Jeremy: oh, it will certainly
not be in the top five.
I think it can avoid the bottom five as
Ben: Yeah, it'll avoid the bottom 5.
It's still hanging out in the tracks,
but it's gonna avoid the bottom 5.
Jeremy: And, uh, finally, at
the very bottom, Don't Breathe.
The movie with the most horrible
Ben: THE TURKEY BASTER FULL OF CUM?
Jeremy: the twist
Ben: can say it.
I will.
Emily: AKA cinema hate crimes.
Jeremy: And what I feel like was
our motto for that entire first, the
entire year after we watched that was
like, the twist should never be rape.
Um,
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: That's the t shirt.
No, don't put that on a t shirt.
It's a terrible t Do
not wear that t shirt.
You will
Jeremy: don't do it.
Emily: Evangelion was this year.
Jeremy: Yep, Evangelion was this year.
well, at least it came out this year.
I think we recorded it before
Emily: Yeah, we recorded it in
2022, but yeah, because it's
Jeremy: It ended up being such a
massive episode that we had to split
it into two and put it after, I think,
last year's rankings was when it
Ben: That checks out.
To be fair, if there's anything
we've ever watched that justifies a
two part episode, it's Evangelion.
Emily: I mean, we watched all of it.
You guys went above and beyond.
And again, I appreciate you for that.
Ben: And I appreciate you for giving me
the opportunity to finally sit down and
actually watch every episode in order,
and not just when I was able to stay awake
for Adult Swim, like, as a 13 year old.
Emily: yeah, I'm here to serve.
Ben: tell ya, it hits
different in your 30s.
Emily: oh my God.
Ben: You relate to Misato a lot more.
Emily: Yeah.
Who's the real protagonist here?
Ben: Her.
Misato!
Emily: Absolutely.
Jeremy: I mean, until the very end, which
turns out to be just, just the worst
Ben: Right up until she Right up until
she fucking kisses a 13 year old.
Jeremy: So, how we started out this year
of recordings was in November, which we
renamed Crowvember because we went four
straight weeks of Dave and Cronenberg,
Ben: Don't do what we did,
Emily: Yeah, please don't do what we did.
Jeremy: I think this was the beginning
of our downward spiral this year of like
four weeks in a row of any director is
too much even, you know, we hit Guillermo
later in the year and that was like
still like by the fourth one you're
just like I don't like this guy anymore.
He's my favorite director and I don't,
don't want to talk about him anymore.
Ben: it's too mu Look, I'm a big
believer, yo, as a creator, in putting
yourself into the work and having people
be able to know you through your work.
There's the limit to how much I
want to know about David Cronenberg!
Emily: There is
Ben: and I really hit
that limit with The Brood.
Emily: I have hit that limit multiple
times, and I've gone back because of
my this dark fascination that I have.
Ben: I've said it before, every
good Cronenberg movie should make
you ask, Is David Cronenberg okay?
And the answer should
always be, No, he is not.
Emily: no,
Jeremy: four weeks in a row of
watching David Cronenberg, you get
to the point of like, should David
Cronenberg be allowed in public?
Like, should David
Cronenberg be locked up?
I don't, like, there's no evidence that
he's done anything wrong, but like,
after you see four weeks in a row of
David Cronenberg films, you're like, he
has to have done something wrong, right?
Nobody makes four, these four movies
and is okay in the rest of their life.
Ben: If somebody told me Canada
had sith, like, sith lords, like
a sith lord and an apprentice,
Jeremy: I thought you were going to
say syphilis.
Ben: I would put so much money that
the Canadian Sith Lords are David
Cronenberg and Nathan Fielder.
Emily: David Cronenberg, it was in
Star Trek though, and that's like a
redemption arc for him, but then he
released the death of David Cronenberg.
Have you seen that?
A short movie that he
did?
I haven't.
Ben: No,
but we did see Crimes of the Future,
which is a director spending a
whole movie taking a victory lap in
a way that I've never seen before.
Emily: Well, if you, if we're going
to refer to that as a victory lap,
Jeremy: let's talk about that one,
because that is the first one we watched.
We talked, we watched Crimes of the
Future a truly demented movie about
the performance art of cutting out
your extra organs, or cutting out your
boyfriend's extra organs, as, as it were.
Ben: I definitely enjoyed this
movie more than y'all did.
Like, for whatever reason, I don't know
why this movie fucking connected with me
in a way that's probably not Good about
me, but I can't help but just laugh so
hard that this the plot of this movie is
essentially David Cronenberg created his
Viggo Mortensen stand in and the plot
of the movie is Everyone going to Viggo
Mortensen and saying you're so cool and
visionary and great and Viggo Mortensen's
character arc is Learning to accept.
Yes.
I am amazing
Emily: was also that really
uncomfortable thing with the kid,
Ben: Oh, there's a, kid eating
a garbage can, there's like, his
fuckin low key, like, furniture
line, we got lesbian Geiger assassins
that never get fuckin explained.
Jeremy: there's a lot of things that
I feel like never get explained in
Ben: If you ever wanted to see
Cronenberg do Film Noir, but he's
kind of was half asleep through every
Film Noir movie he ever watched, holy
shit is Crimes of the Future for you.
Jeremy: Let's talk about ranking here.
Uh, like I said, there's 103.
I think it, it definitely places out
of some of the lower groups here.
Ben: Oh, this is like, this is
definitely like, in the, this
is a middle of the pack movie.
Jeremy: yeah, we'll, we'll talking
about things that involve Cronenberg.
At 71 right now, we have Nightbreed.
Do we like it better or
worse than Nightbreed?
Ben: Definitely more than
Emily: yeah, yeah, definitely better
the knight breed.
Jeremy: It's definitely
better made than Nightbreed.
That's for sure.
At, uh, 60, we have The
Craft, the original The Craft.
Do we like it more or less than The Craft?
Ben: not as much as The Craft.
Emily: Do I like it more or
less than, more than the craft?
No, I don't like it more than the craft.
Do I think it's craft is
better than the craft?
Yes.
Ben: I think, wait, did I
say something different?
Emily: you said that
you like the craft more.
Ben: Than Crimes of the Future.
Jeremy: So, Emily, you're saying that
you think Crimes of the Future is,
like, just generally better made.
You don't like it better.
Ben: Okay,
Emily: yeah, yeah.
I
Ben: got what you're saying.
I don't know I feel like it's definitely
above Alien 3 for me, that's for sure.
Jeremy: Yeah, Alien 3 currently sits at
65, so, I would say, yeah, above Alien 3.
Below The Craft for me, which in
between there is Last Night in Soho,
Saw, You're Next, and Ginger Snaps.
Ben: I think that goes, it goes between
Last Night in Soho and Saw for me.
Emily: Oh my god, I was gonna
say the exact same thing.
Ben: Woo!
Emily: Peace!
Unless Jeremy,
Jeremy: now that, that works for me.
I mean, I, I do love You're Next.
Like, I, I definitely like You're Next
better, but I, I will freely admit that
Crimes of the Future is, is probably
trying to do more than You're Next is.
Yeah, Saw, Saw is a 2000s nu
metal masterpiece but it is.
Emily: That's a weird
bunch of words together.
Ben: I recently saw the very off
Broadway play, Saw the Musical.
So, it's now that much more impossible
for me to take the Saw movie seriously.
Emily: I feel like I would love
the musical better than the
Ben: Oh, you would!
It's great!
It's, it's absolutely
Jeremy: I'm cutting off
Ben: song about how Carrie Elway's
character became an oncologist
just so he could give people
the worst news of their life.
It feels like an update of the Dentist
song, like a next level take on
the Dentist song from Little Shop.
Emily: okay.
Ben: like the sadist oncologist who's
like, oh, I became an oncologist because
I get off on telling people they're dying.
Emily: That's fucked up.
Ben: Also, they make it gay.
Emily: Okay, all right.
Ben: Yeah, it's, it's very off Broadway.
A lot of fun.
I had a great time.
Emily: God, we
Ben: If you get a chance
to see
Emily: friggin movies.
Ben: also with Saw, that also I
find makes it very hard to take it
seriously, is just being, getting
overly familiar with directors.
Once you know a James won movie on
site, it's kind of impossible not to
see just the intense golden retriever
energy he's bringing to every movie.
Emily: Oh,
Jeremy: don't mind that.
I like a good golden retriever energy.
The thing that gets me watching
Saw now is any scene that takes
place outside of the warehouse.
Especially the point where they're
like, there's the driving scene, which
is clearly all happening inside a
parking deck with a lot of fog machines.
Ben: you mean like the 15 hours
they could afford to any Glover?
Jeremy: Yeah, it's pretty wild.
Now I think.
Easily better than Crimes of
the Future was the next David
Cronenberg movie we watched, The Fly.
Um,
Ben: Oh, yeah.
That's gonna be the peak of Cronenberg
Jeremy: yeah, so I
Ben: I don't know where video does.
I don't even know if video
Jerome gets a number video.
Jerome is video.
Jerome,
Emily: I
Jeremy: just is.
Ben: which is, it's like dark side.
Emily: hailed a new flesh.
Jeremy: Videodrome is.
All right, so looking at around
the middle of the list, like
number 50 right now is Halloween.
Do we like it better than
the original Halloween?
Emily: Yeah,
absolutely.
Jeremy: All right, so
40 is After Midnight.
Do we like it better than After Midnight?
Emily: Yes.
Jeremy: Or I guess no.
40 is the, well, okay,
After Midnight is 41.
The Descent is 40.
Do we like it better than The Descent?
Ben: This is definitely, we're,
we've definitely hit the zone.
This is like, somewhere in the, I
feel like it's somewhere in the 30s.
Jeremy: Yeah, The Descent to me is
still like one of the scariest movies.
That we've watched, like,
just
for straight up fear.
Ben: It's, look, it's got the best
jump scare I've ever fucking seen.
Like, we watched a lot of movies with a
lot of jump scares, nothing's ever beaten
the fuck in the camera where like the
fucking the crawly, creepy crawly shows
up in the camera, or in the night vision.
Jeremy: Yeah it's excellent.
I mean, do we feel like, I mean, the fly
is definitely a different kind of horror.
It's not a jumpy type of horror.
It's a body type of
Ben: I feel like Fly is definitely
getting, like, A reputation bonus in that
it's like, you know what I mean, where
there's a certain amount of like, oh, it's
the fly, it's held in such high prestige,
Jeremy: Well, it also gets a
gold bloom bonus, like just
Ben: does get the gold bloom.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Having gold bloom in it makes it
such a better movie than I think
it would have been otherwise.
Ben: Oh, no other actor
could have done a good job.
Also, the Geena Davis bonus.
Emily: Yes.
Goldblum and Davis.
Jeremy: I mean, I love Geena Davis.
The like pure manic energy that,
Goldbloom brings to it, that was like,
Ben: oh yeah, and look, and Geena
Davis having to deliver the emotional
climax of the movie with a screen
partner who is a gooey muppet.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Emily: I mean, I don't think
that's the first time that she's
done that, but I mean, she's also
like an actress in Hollywood.
So, I
Ben: Who's that?
Was that a Weinstein joke?
I'm not sure what the hell that was,
Emily: I mean, yeah, like,
pick your Hollywood creep
Ben: Yeah, okay, so it was
a Hollywood creep joke.
Emily: Yes.
Yes.
I agree that the fly has star power.
It has iconic power which I
feel like puts it above Lost
Ben: the the ballsiest character
of all time being the teleporter
computer who refuses to admit failure.
Jeremy: Teleporter Computer
is like, hey, we did it.
Ben: Computer being like,
fucking nailed it bro!
Still one of my favorite
moments in all of cinema.
Emily: So here's the question, above
or below Nightmare on Elm Street?
Jeremy: That's a tough one,
comparing those two movies.
They're both so, so influential.
Ben: Well, how about there's lost boys?
Jeremy: I think it's above Lost
Boys.
Emily: would agree it's above Lost Boys.
Jeremy: I have a deep and abiding
affection for Lost Boys, but Lost Boys
just isn't a, isn't that good of a movie.
Emily: I love Lost Boys and
it's, you know, it's all right.
Jeremy: It is what it
Ben: Fly is definitely
better than Lost Boys.
don't I like Vividge more than Fly.
I don't It's on one It's on one
side of Nightmare on Elm Street.
Emily: If we are ranking The Fly high
enough because of its icon status,
Ben: it's also just one of, like,
the all time great body horrors.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: The makeup work that's done
in conjunction with Goldbloom's
performance is one of the most
creeptastic skin crawling performances,
like, And characters I've ever seen.
Emily: I think that in terms of combining
the recognizability the memorability, the
influence, and also the craft of it, I
would say above Nightmare on Elm Street.
Ben: we do have to remember that
Nightmare on Elm Street has Johnny Depp
getting turned into a geyser of blood.
Emily: That's true.
That's true.
And some incredible effects with,
like, upside down rooms and stuff.
Ben: yeah, oh, great effect.
Jeremy: yeah, and
Nightmare on Elm Street, I mean, like,
if we're talking about how iconic The Fly
is, obviously Nightmare on Elm Street.
Is incredibly iconic in its own right.
Ben: Yeah, like,
these are
Jeremy: the best, like,
Ben: classics.
Yeah, like, these are both
straight up classics of the genre.
I I gotta
Jeremy: Probably the
best Freddy ever is, too,
Ben: give it to Nightmare
on Elm Street, I think.
Emily: I big differ.
I'd say it's above
Nightmare on Elm Street.
Ben: Choose, Jeremy!
Decide!
Jeremy: I think I'm gonna come out with
Nightmare on Elm Street above the fly.
Just barely.
Emily: This will be
Jeremy: If we were ranking the entire
Nightmare on Elm Street series against
the fly, it would be lower, but the first
Nightmare on Elm Street is extremely
Ben: Yeah, that's It's extremely
solid, but I think that's
where I think you're right.
Like, that's one of the factors, is that
Nightmare on Elm Street, as a series, is
kind of greater than the sum of its parts.
Whereas The Fly is just All on
it's own, just fuckin A solid.
Like, A solid is gold.
Emily: Yeah, well, the first
Nightmare on Elm Street is a good,
memorable, fun slasher movie.
Maybe not, like, a fantastic movie, but I
mean, The Fly isn't a, it's a good movie.
I'll concede the point though
because, like, Freddy Krueger,
Ben: What is fantastic?
I
Emily: yeah,
Ben: of
the biggest, I think one of the biggest
tragedies today is needing everything
to be a 9 out of, a 9 or a 10 out of 10,
and not knowing how to enjoy, you know,
what a good easy 10 can bring, in terms
of like, you know, not every show needing
to be the most prestiged drama show.
Emily: Yeah, no there's something to be
said for fun and memorable campiness.
This is a friggin horror podcast,
Ben: I think what I'm saying
is, remember CW shows?
Those were fun.
Emily: I don't.
Ben: Remember One Tree Hill?
Jeremy: I feel like now that
Riverdale is over, the CW is,
like, there aren't any more
true
CW
Ben: no, network excelled
through 7 out of 10s like a CW.
that was like your C student who
just goes on to make six figures.
Emily: Yeah, I can't remember that.
Any of it.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Emily: look the same.
It's like all of the
Ben: They gossiped all the girl.
And Ryan Reynolds married one of them.
Emily: Oh yeah,
Ben: He married the gossip girl.
Emily: them.
Alright, Videodrome!
Jeremy: Alright, I would say Videodrome
is definitely lower than the first two,
Ben: so if, if Jeff Goldblum
Give something a star bonus.
What does James Woods bring to the table?
Emily: Oh
Jeremy: fucking anchor.
Emily: Yeah, a little dead weight.
Ben: that he doesn't do a good job
playing an unredeemable sleazebag.
Emily: it's really cool
Ben: James, I played Rudy
Giuliani in a biopic, like, in
a made for TV biopic, Woods.
Emily: I can't I mean, it was Like just
as it's fun to watch Jeff Goldblum turn
into a pile of goo, It's really fun to
watch James Woods, like, deteriorate
under his own, like, bullshit.
And then, into, yeah,
Ben: And in much faster time
than it happened in real life.
Emily: yeah, I mean,
Ben: Get fucked, James Woods, you piece of
Emily: Videotrope is an interesting
morality play that works on
levels that it did not anticipate.
But I will bring this to the discussion.
I will highlight the scene
wherein he whips the cabinet TV.
Jeremy: And the TV moans
Emily: and the TV moans sexually.
Well, the woman on the TV moans sexually.
There are moments where the TV, like,
touches him back or whatever, but
Ben: This movie has Impeccable vibes, and
the imagery it creates, and the influence
that imagery has had, can't be denied,
and it's definitely saying something,
but overall I'm not really sure how
good a movie it, like, it actually is.
Emily: I'm putting it between
Crimson Peak and Nightbreed.
Ben: Yeah.
Jeremy: I think that's
higher than I was looking.
Emily: I mean, I would, I love Devilman
more than I love it, but You know,
Ben: Wait, are you ranking
it above Devil Man?
No.
Emily: I am, well, Devilman is, is sort
of in a spot.
Ben: I do not rank this movie
above Bula or Scream two
Emily: Okay, that's true.
I would
Jeremy: okay, hold on.
Here's an interesting question.
At 83 and 84 right now, we
have Titton and The Hunger.
And so we have Near Dark Titton
and The Hunger all together.
Do we like it better in all those movies?
Emily: No,
thank you for reminding me.
I mean, I like it better than Prometheus.
Ben: yeah.
Can we downgrade Prometheus while
we're, can we make this a double like
ranking of like downgrading Prometheus?
Jeremy: like if we want to put
Videodrome under The Hunger and then
put Prometheus under Videodrome,
Ben: would, I personally would
rank Videodrome over The Hunger.
Emily: Okay, so I think, Videodrome
actually works pretty well between
The Hunger and Titant because
Ben: Yeah,
Jeremy: It's this fucked up neighborhood.
Emily: yeah, the Videodrome
does have shit happening in it.
Whereas The Hunger, arguably,
has very little happening.
Ben: you do get very young Willem
Dafoe as a street tough though,
and for that I will always love it.
Emily: no, I mean, The Hunger,
I love The Hunger as well.
However,
Jeremy: were really just coming off of
just having watched Prometheus when we
ranked these last year, I think, since we
were still riding that high of Prometheus.
Ben: Cause that, the thing
about Prometheus is that,
It's so, it's fun.
It's so, it's one of the
most fun, most bad movies
Jeremy: All she had to do was
dive sideways and she would have
been out of the way of that ship.
Emily: yeah, I
think we were just really, like,
happy that Charlize Theron was on the
screen and that we had the Fassbender
thing.
Like, I think we were on that
Ben: I mean, Yeah, it's like, this is a
mo like, we get so much mileage out of
a movie that brings a biologist on their
mission to find evidence of alien life,
and upon that biologist finding evidence
of alien life, his immediate response is,
I'm getting I'm nopin the fuck outta here.
And then me and the this other dude
are gonna get lost, even though that
dude's only job was make the map and
make to make sure we don't get lost.
Emily: Yeah,
let's put Prometheus
underneath The Hunger.
Jeremy: Works for me.
Ben: Like that's a level
of just stupidity that,
Emily: It does make
Ben: never get, I'll never get
Emily: Better watch out, you better
watch out, you better watch out.
But it was a
Jeremy: Okay, now here's the question.
That just leaves us with one
more Cronenberg film that we
watched, which is The Brood,
Ben: Oh boy.
Jeremy: the film about how a woman gets
so mad that she gives birth to tiny
troll things in an external egg sac that
Ben: list, on our list of which movies
make me feel the director needs therapy.
This is the reigning champ.
This is number one.
Emily: long time ago.
We assume he's gotten therapy since then?
Ben: It's hard to tell
given how much psych like.
Therapists themselves are
demonized in the brood.
Emily: And in Nightbreed.
Ben: it is quite clear that
Cronenberg has a bone to pick
with, like, marriage counselors.
Jeremy: Cronenberg is himself an
evil therapist and nightbreed.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: now do, do we like this
better or worse than Videodrome?
Ben: Honestly, worse for
me.
just a more For as much as, you know,
for all the various craziness and all
the ambition that Videodrome has, like,
even though it doesn't work, you can't
take away dad's ambition, whereas I feel
like The Brood is just a more straight
down the middle horror story, it's
less interestingly made, and honestly,
there's just a shitload of misogyny.
Jeremy: Like, I like The Brood more,
but I think it's just because I like
telling people about The Brood more.
Like, that I'm just like, let
me tell you about this film.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: The Brood was more fun!
Emily: Yeah, it's true.
I like the wolf house more
than I like the brood.
Jeremy: oh, I do not like The Wolf
House more than I like The Brood.
I was thinking right under
Repo, a genetic opera.
Ben: was honestly exactly where I was,
but yeah, between Scream 3 and Repo, that
was honestly exactly where I was looking.
Jeremy: I was thinking under Repo,
so between Repo and Blood and Donuts.
Emily: Okay.
I like Blood and Donuts better, but
I know that this isn't about me.
So, you know, I'm not
gonna, I'm not gonna pick
about the Brute.
Jeremy: it, Ben would put it higher,
you would put it lower than, I guess,
Ben: No, I would put it
above Blood and Donuts.
I'll give you Repo for, I'll
give you Repo above it, but yeah.
I'd give it, between Repo
and Blood and Donuts.
Blood and Donuts is a wondrous,
silly mess of a movie, but it is
a hot fucking mess of a movie.
Jeremy: yeah, neither of those
films have an extremely sexual,
uh, Anthony Stewart head singing
Emily: That's true.
Jeremy: about Repo stuff, people's organs.
Ben: say needlessly sexy, I feel like it
was very, like, necessary for the film.
Jeremy: I mean, you're,
I mean, you're not wrong.
Speaking of horror musicals, the
next one we watched, the next film we
watched, we brought on, uh, editor Lauren
Heidsouzen to talk about Rockula as
part of our, our December, uh, Dracula,
Ben:
YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I.
Love.
This.
Movie.
And.
It's.
Fuckin TRASH!
Emily: Yeah, I love this
movie too, and it's trash.
I think I'm gonna put, I like, I
think we're in kind of the same,
we're in a of nearby neighborhood.
I'm gonna put it just below The Hunger,
just from, like, film quality alone,
but I, has so many good, like, I like
this movie better than a lot, like,
Ben: I definitely liked this
more than Hell I definitely
liked it more than Hellbent.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah, it feels very, uh, of the
same school as, uh, Scream 3 and Repo.
Ultimately, I think it's a
little, it's a little better.
So yeah, I mean, if, if you guys feel
Ben: I do give it credit I mean,
it's definitely a more Emotionally
satisfying movie than Better Watch Out.
It's not a better made film,
Emily: I guess, yeah.
Ben: but I definitely
enjoyed it a lot more.
Emily: Yeah, I mean, also the messaging
is a little bit better, even for the time.
I mean, it's not great.
Ben: Look, any movie that What We Do in
the Shadows would that shamelessly steal
from has to have something going for it.
Jeremy: yeah, I'm honestly, I mean, I
feel like I
would watch Rockula again
before Videodrome or Ditton.
I don't know that it's better.
Ben: I would put it, would put it
after, like it more than Event Horizon?
Emily: Where's the vent horizon?
No, no, absolutely not.
Jeremy: I think Near
Dark beats out Rockula.
Definitely.
As well, so, that would be,
Ben: Oh, yes, I would definitely rank
it below near Yes, I definitely did
not like it as much as Near Dark.
Emily: Yeah, Near Dark was a
better weird vampire movie.
Jeremy: yeah, so that, that again
puts us with Teton, Videodrone,
and The Hunger, and Prometheus now.
Where do we feel like it goes in there?
Emily: Below Titan, and Below
the Hunger, because the Hunger
is a better vampire movie, even
though, like, it's better made.
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean, Racula is
probably ultimately more fun, but The
Ben: definitely is.
But The Hunger's definitely better made.
Definitely above Prometheus, though.
Jeremy: yeah, I mean, I think
it, it should be taken about
as seriously as Prometheus.
Emily: yeah.
Ben: But with the bedazzled pirate
swinging around the literal hand bone?
Jeremy: yeah,
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: uh,
Emily: haven't,
Jeremy: sexy vampire mom, I really got
Emily: yeah, the sexy vampire mom,
the hey Mickey,
Ben: sexy vampire mom.
Enter pro wrestler boyfriend.
Emily: boyfriends, she's rockin it.
Ben: Somebody pitch that comic.
Or pitch that plotline to AEW.
Jeremy: look I would
totally pitch that to AEW.
I thought they were just taking
pitches from random dudes.
All right.
And so that, uh, that settles that one.
So the second week of our Dracula December
coverage, we watched Taste the Blood
of Dracula with our friend, Chris Sims.
Which is true hammer Dracula.
Christopher Lee standing at a distance
staring at people who definitely
are not on set the same time as him.
Ben: Not good.
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: It's fun, but not good.
Emily: it's around, it's like,
gonna be neighbors to Rockula.
I think it's better than
Rockula, just, you know, because
there's Christopher Lee in it.
Ben: don't know.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: It's like, it's interesting,
but it's also boring at times.
And Rockula was never boring.
Emily: that's true,
that's true, that's true.
Jeremy: And don't, don't forget about
the, uh, Heckwater clubs, the, uh,
Emily: Oh yeah.
Jeremy: hellfire club that the,
the three rich guys had going on,
Ben: Yes!
Emily: Oh my God.
Jeremy: where they were like They would
just go hang out at the brothel and
Emily: And
Jeremy: sex everyone up and then they
were like what this dude all the ladies
love Love sleeping with this dude.
We got to figure out what he's up
to and the answer was witchcraft
Ben: It's really hard to overstate
just how bored rich European
dudes were in the 19th century.
Emily: And that's too bad.
Cause there's so many things
going on in their lives.
Like, like so many diseases and like
Ben: Well that's what they were at
the brothel to get, they were at the
brothel to get some of those diseases
Emily: I guess.
Yeah.
Like there were just like I can't, I
need something to, I need some challenge.
I need to live life on hard mode.
It's like, you know,
when people do paypal.
Ben: Oh man, the European gentry would
have been so fucking into paintball if
they had access to it back in the day.
Emily: I mean, yeah,
Jeremy: They could have just
shot peasants, you know,
Ben: Yeah, I mean they wouldn't, I
mean they wouldn't have fought other
people with paintball guns, but
they would have enjoyed having them.
Emily: yeah, I'm sure that a
few of them did shoot peasants,
Jeremy: just a few
Emily: just a few.
I mean, depending on how,
like, a lot of them absolutely
shot peasants, depending on
Ben: My favorite thing about, like,
that era, like, you know, 17th to
19th century, like, European nobles,
is that so much of history is just
like, uh, but how can we know, like,
what this person was really thinking?
So much lost to time, it's not like
we have any first hand accounts.
Everything was documented with
these motherfuckers, we know what
they had for breakfast on specific
days and how they thought about it.
Emily: it's just that
it's not that interesting.
Ben: No, their lives sucked,
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: but we know everything about them.
Jeremy: so we are thinking sort
of in the same area as Dracula
Ben: Yes, thank you, I
forgot what we were talking
about.
Jeremy: again, we have the
hunger of Dracula and Prometheus
And then better watch out.
Where do we think it falls in there?
Emily: uNder Rockula.
Jeremy: above Prometheus?
Emily: Yes.
Ben: That one sucked, because I'm
just like Man, that Dracula movie,
I know it's got Christopher Lee, but
it was also clearly made in, like,
three months on, like, 200 pounds.
Jeremy: And Christopher Lee
was almost never on the set at
the same time as somebody else,
Ben: and I'm just like, look,
Prometheus is one of the dumbest
fucking movies I've ever seen.
But Ridley Scott sure did
make the shit out of it.
Jeremy: He spent a lot of
money making a very bad movie.
Ben: It's a very bad movie, but like, if
they both have just garbage nothings of
plots, At least Prometheus is legitimately
nice to look at almost the whole time.
Emily: I mean, you could still have
sexy vampire mom and Christopher Lee.
Ben: You do have Christopher
Lee, but then you got Idris Elba.
Idris
Emily: It's true.
Ben: Elba and Benedict Wong and
third guy, who is are not dumb.
Jeremy: That movie, I almost get
mad at it for having Idris Elba and
Charlize Theron and just wasting them.
Like, Charlize Theron especially.
They just waste
her.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: But again, you know what?
I take it back.
I take it back.
Fuckin Blood of Dracula over Prometheus.
Because I just remembered that for
no goddamn reason at all, they
put Guy Pearce in old man makeup
for no goddamn good reason.
so they can have not old man makeup
in the fucking YouTube tie in, fucking
augmented reality game marketing scheme?
Go fuck yourself, Prometheus.
Emily: I want to talk about
Bram Stoker's Dracula now.
Jeremy: yeah, you want to talk
about somebody who directed
the shit out of something.
Let's talk about Francis Ford
Coppola directing this shit out
of fucking Bram Stoker's Dracula.
I think we need to move on up
the list for this one, right?
Emily: Yeah, I'm up in the 30s now.
I don't know if I'd put it in the 20s.
Although it is, like, I think
it's on par with Hellraiser,
like, the original Hellraiser.
Ben: me take a look what we got
here
Jeremy: I accidentally let go
of it and it, it somehow settled
right next to the Lost Boys.
I don't know how that happened.
Emily: uh huh.
What?
I'm sorry, like, this is an interesting
way to assert your authority.
Jeremy: I'm thinking about it
like, like we said, Bram Stoker's,
Dracula, Oscar for most directing.
There's so much, so much going on,
at any given
time.
Ben: just looking at this list It is
crazy that on a list of horror movies
Eve's Bayou almost cracks the top 25
Emily: was a good
Ben: It's a very good movie.
I'm just imagining someone looking at
a tub horror movie and being like, I
didn't think Eve's Bayou even counted.
Emily: Well, we say accounts.
Ben: We say it counts,
and honestly, great movie.
Very good, great movie.
Love Eve's Bayou.
fantastic fantastic drama.
Emily: I think it's, I think it
is better than Count Draculia.
Jeremy: right now at 30 we
have, it follows and I'm not
sure that I can like, say that.
I think.
Bram Stoker's Dracula is
legitimately better than It Follows.
Ben: That's fair.
Emily: I'm not sure that I can
say that Bram Stoker's Dracula is
legitimately better than The Witch.
Ben: No, I wouldn't put
it above The Vividge
either.
Emily: I would put it above
Nightmare on the Elm Street, though.
But that's me.
And that's also, like,
14 year old Emily talking.
Ben: I definitely enjoyed it more, but
I'm also definitely in an era of just
like, really enjoying unhinged directors.
Jeremy: Yeah, I'm, I think for
me it would be under The Fly,
so right above Lost Boys at
Ben: I'll give you, I'll give
you a Yeah, definitely above.
I'll give you that.
Definitely Above Lost Boys.
Emily: so right where you
put it in the beginning,
Jeremy: I put it under Lost
Boys initially, but I, I,
Ben: Above Lost.
I put it above Lost
Boys.
Emily: I put it above
Nightmare on Elm Street.
Ben: I think I should win
because I like winning.
Jeremy: mean if we want to split
the difference then it would be,
we could put it between Nightmare
on Elm Street and The Fly.
Emily: Okay,
Ben: King, Solomon de declares.
Cut that baby down the fucking medal.
Emily: yeah, for real,
Jeremy: and of course, like, if Francis
Ford Coppola was directing it, it
would be, you would watch the baby be
cut in half while there were two other
scenes unfolding in the background, and
you were reading you were
also reading a page about it.
Ben: it's a famous people, but I like to
imagine Solomon was like suggesting that
shit all the time and he is just like,
really, let's just want someone, want
someone to let me cut a baby in half.
Jeremy: and every time, I say, just
cut the baby in half, and every time,
somebody's like, no, I love that baby.
Someday, somebody's gonna
let me cut the baby!
in half.
Emily: Yeah, and, you know, the fact that
some that we heard about it happening one
time must mean that it happened like a
bunch of times, and this is just the time
that was like super memorable, right?
Ben: That checks out.
Emily: Yeah.
So, Dracula 1931.
Jeremy: OG
Ben: One of those ones where it's like,
you always gotta give it its props, but
by our hoity toity A24 elevated modern
horror bougie as fuck standards, like,
you gotta give it its flowers, but where
do we honestly put it in these rankings?
Emily: I'm gonna put it in the, uh,
the neighborhood of Girl Walks Home
Alone at Night, Velvet Buzzsaw.
Maybe, like, closer to Godzilla 1954.
Ben: Yeah, that feels like
a good point of comparison.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah,
both, both movies that aren't particularly
scary, actually, like, especially
looking back on them, but do have, like,
do set the standards of some of these
things.
Ben: liked Godzilla more than uh, Dracula.
Emily: I also like Godzilla more than
Dracula, but I'm also incredibly biased.
Jeremy: Yeah I honestly, like, for all
of its accolades, I don't think Dracula
is the, I mean, I think it might not
even be, like, top two of the, like,
classic universal horror movies, like,
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: the James Whale, all three of the
James Whale movies are better than that.
Like, I think Invisible Man,
Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein
are all better than Dracula.
Ben: I definitely don't
rank it above Annihilation.
Do we like it more than Halloween?
How do we feel about Halloween?
Emily: Yeah, I
Ben: okay.
I'd probably put it Between
Annihilation and Hard Candy.
Emily: Okay, those are
some rough customers.
Ben: yeah, that's a motherfucker
of a double feature.
Don't watch those movies back to back.
Emily: Yeah, maybe you two need
a Dracula in between there to
Jeremy: I think we did, didn't we?
Emily: I think we did as well.
Jeremy: Yeah, Annihilation and Hard Candy.
We've got them two episodes apart.
I don't know what we watched in
between those, but Oh, we watched
Black Swan in between those.
We
Ben: Oh god, oh god, what the
fuck were what the fuck were we
Jeremy: That was a rough fuckin month.
Emily: Yeah, well, what
month was that?
What was our we're like the hard month.
We're just gonna do hard mode
this month We did Crowvember, that
was easy compared to this shit.
Ben: Ugh.
Emily: man
Ben: At least we didn't attempt,
like, Patrick Wilson month.
It's three Conjuring movies and
then we finish big with Hard Candy.
Emily: Mmm Yeah, that I would have,
I don't know, I kind of would need
hard candy first, and then be like,
oh, how cute, they're trying to
do like, fake possession bullshit.
Jeremy: I think sticking Dracula in
there at 47, like, that works for me,
between Annihilation and Hard Candy.
Ben: yeah, one day we'll need to
do a Conjuring movie, if only to
fuckin tear it, like, pick it apart.
Jeremy: Yeah, I finally watched, like, I
haven't watched a Conjuring movie since
the first one, and I finally watched
The Nun, which is separated enough that
I'm just like, oh, I can enjoy this.
Ben: mean, like, I haven't seen any
of them, but I assume that Patrick
Wilson solves, like, saves the day
by affirming the power of having
sex within the bounds of marriage.
Emily: I think I saw one.
I
Ben: I
understand, it's, Patrick Wilson,
it's like, it's horny, but in a
Catholicism approved kind of way.
Jeremy: The Conjuring?
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: I mean, that's not probably.
Um, probably not how I would
describe it, but yeah, sure.
so that finally gets us
out of the year 2022.
We are into 2023 with our,
uh, February, Black Directors Month polls.
We started out pretty hot with Nope.
Nope is gonna be a high one for me.
Emily: Yeah, no, I'm,
I'm, I am about to get pretty spicy
with my take for Nope, cause I think
it is better than the Babadook.
Ben: Oh!
It's,
oh, I
Jeremy: I
don't know if I can support that.
Emily: Okay, I think Nope is a
very, very good, very solid film.
I think it's
Ben: it's
very good.
It has a lot to say.
Emily: Yeah, it's definitely,
Ben: Back to the brim
with topics and ideas.
Jeremy: here's our, our Original,
our first movie, Jennifer's
body is currently at 20.
Do we feel
Ben: Definitely, yes.
I,
Emily: oh my god, yeah, definitely
better than, I would put House,
or Nope above House.
Jeremy: promising young
woman is currently at 15.
Do we put it above promising young
woman?
Emily: Yes,
we put
it
Ben: above Candyman.
I put it above Bit.
Emily: and I put it a bit as well.
Yeah,
Jeremy: man, I do love me some bit.
Okay, at number 10, capping off the top
10 currently is Night of the Living Dead.
Do we put it above Night
of the Living Dead?
Emily: I mean, we're looking
at historical icon power.
Night of the Living
Dead certainly has that,
but
Ben: put it above Mayhem, I'll tell you
Emily: yeah, absolutely above Mayhem.
Jeremy: Yeah, so that,
that puts us at number 11.
So, we have two Jordan Peele movies
and one Jordan Peele adjacent, or one
Jordan Peele penned movie in the top ten.
So, Candyman is at number eight,
Ben: like our Jordan Peele, like
most audiences.
I
Emily: what can I say?
Nope is such a fucking good movie.
Ben: I wouldn't rank it
above Train to Busan.
Emily: yeah, I'll give you that.
Jeremy: This is, this top ten is packed.
Emily: I actually like nope.
Well, I have an incredible
affection for nope.
I Don't know if I can
see
Ben: movie.
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: I will say You know what, now
that I feel strong about Top 5.
Now that we've had time to review it.
Those 6, 7, 8 spots, how do
we feel about, like, 6 through
9, how do we feel about that?
Do we want to make any shifts
between, like, Us, Prey,
Candyman, and Train to Busan?
Emily: No I don't want to, I don't know,
I don't want to mess with what we've had
Ben: Okay.
Emily: so far.
I mean, unless it's like a
glaring issue like Prometheus.
Ben: No, these are not glaring issues.
These are all, like, these
are all fucking great movies.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah, it's hard to go between
these because Train to Busan is so good.
Ben: yeah,
Jeremy: But, like, trying to move
that above, like, Prey, I don't know.
Ben: it's, I mean, they're
all so good at what they do.
I think to me, at least, with Train to
Busan and Nope is that As much as I love
NOPE, I think it's the difference of all
of the things and conversations NOPE is
having and touching on versus Train to
Busan being laser focused on like we're
just gonna execute the best fucking zombie
movie you've ever seen, and a father
daughter relationship that's just gonna
fucking gut, like, tear your heart out.
Emily: yeah Train to Busan did
make me cry multiple times, like,
when I was talking about it, so I
think I'm gonna, yeah I'm at peace
Ben: Like they're both Great,
yeah, they're both great, but I, I
think, but personally, yeah, gotta
give, that feels right, though,
Jeremy: Yeah, like, I really
love, like, I have a hard time
thinking about nope versus Us,
like Us is currently at number six.
Nope is like, I would re watch it
sooner than I re watch Us, but like,
Us has so much, it's so fascinating,
like, there's so much to talk about in
that movie.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: I think as amazing as, Kiki Palmer
and Daniel Kaluuya are in that movie.
What to me, just sets us apart and what
sets it above is, the first thing I
think of when I think of us is Lupita
and her performance and that, those
dual roles, it's just one of the best
acting I've ever seen in my life.
Emily: Yeah, they do.
Yeah.
Ben: The heights that she reaches as an
actress in that film are just Incredible.
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean, looking at
Nope, you know, we have like, we have
three other alien movies in the top
ten in the thing, alien, and prey.
Ben: God, I love Attack the Block.
And don't
forget
Jeremy: oh, and Attack the Block,
Emily: Yeah.
That's, that's one thing I was
thinking about, like, if I had Nope
in the top 10, it would be, like,
Get Out and then All Alien Movies.
we can save the Babadook where it is.
I think,
Ben: Yeah, I
Emily: we continue.
Ben: Well, look, it's not our fault people
make so many great alien horror movies.
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean, as good as Nope
is, I didn't feel like, like I was
having a crisis after watching Nope
the way I did after watching Babadook.
Emily: that's
Ben: I think, that's
also because it's Act 3.
It becomes like a Spielberg
adventure movie, almost.
And it's climaxed.
Like, does not leave you
with that feeling of dread.
It gives you a much more
uplifting sense of catharsis.
Again, as a film, it's Beautiful
and it's wonderful, but it doesn't
leave you with that same sense of
lingering terror and dread that, you
know, even, uh, Get Out or Us had.
Jeremy: yeah.
Let's talk about the
second week of February.
We did Master.
Ben: Was I here for that one?
I don't know if I was here for that one.
Emily: I,
Jeremy: Somebody was
not here for that one.
Emily: okay, well, I, I was here for it,
Ben: Otherwise, it was a very
forgettable film, so I'm gonna say I
Jeremy: it honestly, that's
not inaccurate though.
It is a
Emily: yeah,
Jeremy: film.
Emily: I Put it above Drag Me
to Hell, but it also is more
forgettable than Drag Me to Hell.
Jeremy: yeah I would think, I
think it's, I think it's has some
ambition in what it's like, it's
trying to say, but it fails doing
Ben: Now, looking at the
Covenant, does it Outdo
Sebastian Sans saying b a b b a a a a ch
We a we a cha
we a a cha Oh
my god!
Jeremy: I think the
Covenant
is
Ben: a
real How is the Covenant
Emily: yeah,
Ben: movie?
Emily: right?
Ben: Now
Jeremy: feel like it fails at very
much the same level as Resident Evil.
Like,
it couldn't be a least,
it couldn't be less alike.
Ben: like, when people say like, you know,
no more rebooting good stuff, like, try
to reboot bad stuff but make it good,
like, the Covenant is high on my list.
Emily: I will say that the Covenant
is just so bananas for, like,
men claiming something as so,
like, deeply rooted in the female
experience, as the witch burnings.
Ben: right?
It's like, really?
White boy?
You had to take everything.
White boys need witchcraft too?
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: Holy fuck.
Jeremy: yeah, for me it's, I
mean, really one side or the other
of, Uh, Resident Evil, probably.
Emily: I'd put it below Resident Evil,
Ben: The
Jeremy: It's
Emily: because at least,
Jeremy: to watch as Resident
Evil.
Emily: yeah, Resident Evil has,
uh, Letty, uh, what's her name?
Jeremy: you know what,
it might not be better,
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: it is, It might
not be better than Sukob.
Emily: It's better than the
Texas Chainsaw Massacre, though.
Jeremy: Yeah, this is where we get into
that very subjective area of things
like we hate at differing degrees.
Cause like, I do really hate
Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but I
actually hate Wolf House more.
Emily: I think you're wrong about,
I think you're, you're unfair to
Wolfhouse, because it's an art film,
Jeremy: I mean, it is certainly that.
It is certainly an art film.
And if Wolf House was half an
hour shorter, I'd probably like it
Ben: Yeah, if Wolfhouse had been
like, 11 minutes, I would have
been like, Wolfhouse fucking
Jeremy: ha.
Emily: I mean,
Ben: Unfortunately, it was not 11 minutes.
Emily: I am gonna agree to disagree.
Ben: House is My opinion on Wolf House
is why I the worst grades I got in
college were in fucking poetry classes.
Emily: it's different though, because
poetry is, when you put words, it's
like, show, don't tell, you know, and
Wolfhouse is all show and no tell, and
I don't know, and maybe it's because
I'm an artist, I don't know, because
I'm like, oh yeah, this is what's
happening, and you know, and it's, it
is kind of hypnotic, but I'm also who
I am, and his house, yeah, I think
is,
Ben: his house, is that wait, is that the
one with African refugees and Matt Smith?
Emily: yes, Yeah.
Ben: Oh, man.
Ooh, I love this movie.
Jeremy: Yeah, I was gonna
say, um, I don't think
it belongs where I've set it
at right now, which is 75.
I just, comparing it to La Llorona
and The Golem, which are both also
Ben: Definitely higher.
Emily: really?
I, uh, I
Jeremy: right now at,
uh, 60 we have Gremlins.
I think his house is probably
better than Gremlins.
Ben: I really, really liked his house.
when you talk about, like, truly
good films, I feel like his
house is really fucking good.
Like, stuff like The Mummy and
Scream, I definitely love more.
like, ooh, maybe in that, like,
I feel like it's somewhere
around, like, Nightmare Alley.
Or
like
black
Jeremy: like I might like it at 50,
which is where it would be right between
Hard Candy and Blood Rundown right
Ben: I like it more than Suspiria,
like if
Jeremy: That's what I was thinking.
Ben: the two.
Jeremy: You say
you
don't, Emily?
Emily: I not, I do not
like it more than Suspiria.
I don't think it belongs higher
than Suspiria or Demonite at all.
I don't think it's above,
Jeremy: knight,
Emily: you know, I could, I
could see it above Hellraiser 2
Hellbound because it's Definitely
Ben: Definitely above Hellbound,
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah,
Ben: Hellraiser 1.
Emily: yeah, no, Hellraiser 2,
like, I think right now, between
Tales from the Crypt, Demon Knight,
and Hellraiser 2, I I already
think that's pretty generous, but
Jeremy: looking at these rankings,
like to my personal ratings of
everything is very, it's very,
Ben: in these rankings, we're,
we're a triumvirate, we compromise.
will ask though, how deep into the top
five do we think Witches of Eastwick goes?
Emily: do we think, what?
Jeremy: very deep, very, very
far below the
Ben: Like, number one, or
like, extra number one?
Emily: sorry, my 70s headphones are
starting to actually die right now.
This may be their last
stand, because I I can't
Ben: Oh, I thought, I thought you were
doing one, as in not acknowledging your
terrible fucking Witches of Eastwick joke.
Emily: Oh, no, I do agree that
Witches of Eastwick is a very, very,
very, very, very awesome movie.
Um,
Ben: the top five, though.
Emily: I don't, no, I don't think so.
Jeremy: actually, give
me, uh, two seconds.
Let me grab some water real quick.
I'll be right back.
And then we'll talk about Saloom.
Ben: Yay.
Oh man, that movie did fuckin rule.
Emily: Yeah, it ruled for, like, a bit.
Ben: Oh, but then it
really fell off, it fell
off
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: A
movie that I wish it, I wish it had
just been, like, crime thriller?
And not a supernatural thing at all?
Emily: Or, like, there, you know,
the supernatural thing was different.
Like, I feel that it was a
hat on a hat when it comes to
Ben: Yeah, that's a You're right, that's
exactly, exactly, it's a hat of a hat.
Emily: Yeah, because, like, that
whole day to night thing, like, if
the hyenas or whatever they call
themselves, like, went out and they
were, like, ghost busting, like,
Ben: Yeah,
Emily: you
Ben: if it had been like, again,
like, I guess if it had been
more franchise minded, which is a
terrible thing to say about a movie.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: series.
Emily: Yeah, like, or if they just
had A better, like it wasn't the
ghost busting wasn't as messy as it
was because like they, they had some
cool moments there, but like the whole
idea that the whole ghost situation
was So I'm thinking I'm going to be
going into the maybe the high 50s.
Do I think it's a better movie than Saw?
Ben: talk about, you know, a hat
on a hat, it not, it having dueling
identities, doing certain things well.
exactly what the fuck it
is what he wants to be
Emily: That's true,
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean, Sal is, is an
infinitely dumber movie than Saloom.
Ben: yeah.
oh yeah.
Jeremy: like, it's, it's
like, Discuss moral issues?
Oh, right.
We should just murder everybody that does
things wrong by putting them in traps.
Whereas Saloom is like, it has a whole,
story about child soldiers and about being
abused as a child and this very, like,
slick crew of, of guys that's led by,
you know, this guy who has this horrible
fear of water because of the stuff he
experienced while he was a child soldier.
I think that movie's incredible.
I think you guys are right that,
like, It takes a weird turn
never quite comes back from it.
Emily: Although, honestly, I think that
if we're gonna be putting a movie, like,
if we're gonna be ranking it here and
talking about it taking a weird turn,
like, I think it kinda sits more with
the Gremlins Rare Exports neighborhood.
Jeremy: yeah, I was actually
thinking right either above
or below the first purge.
So above the craft, which again, the
craft is similar to sloom in a lot of ways
that it like has this setup that promises
a movie that it then does not deliver.
Emily: That's true, and it doesn't
have the same incredibly problematic
elements that the craft does, even
though, you know, love the craft
Ben: Love a good craft.
Emily: love a good craft,
Jeremy: I've gained, I think, a
new appreciation watching a lot of
the rest of the series for Child's
Play but I think Sloom is probably
below Child's Play overall for me
Emily: I'd puT it above.
Ben: I'm also going to
vote for above Child's Play
because I, if only that, Solemn
definitely emotionally affected me
much more than Child's Play did.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: Child's Play is fun, but
Solemn made me feel feelings.
Jeremy: What has set Child's Play
apart as a horror franchise is how much
it is about, systems failing people,
especially, you know, this, this kid,
Andy, I think there's no question in
the movie and in real life that people
are like, this thing is just a doll.
There's no way it should be able to do
anything to hurt people to kill this kid.
But like the whole point I think of
a lot of child's play is like, well,
yeah, it's because nobody listens to
this kid and this kid's mom is, you
know, constantly at work because she's
you know, a single mom who's just like
having to work constantly just to pay
Ben: good.
It's good.
Urban horror.
Like, I really like its use
of, like, horror in the city.
I think part of my problem with it
is that I've now watched ahead of the
series, up to, uh, Child's Play 4,
and now my attitude is like, A Child's
Play movie without Jennifer Tilly?
Boo!
Come back when you have Jennifer Tilly!
Jeremy: So you've only seen
to Bride of Chucky so far.
Ben: Yes!
Jeremy: I am very curious when
you watch Seed of Chucky, I want
to know what you think of it.
Ben: Oh, I already know I'm, it's
gonna be a whole bunch of stuff.
Jeremy: Yeah.
The Seed of Chucky is, is.
fascinating, uh, in that they
have Billy Boyd playing the like,
child of Tiffany and Chucky,
um, who is like, a doll in that, you
know, they have a smooth downstairs.
So there's like this whole
question about whether it
becomes this question about this
Ben: So just like, Lord of the Rings,
Hobbit, Billy Boyd, playin this puppet.
Emily: Oh god,
Jeremy: He is going full tilt.
It's a very strange movie.
And in which jennifer Tilly, the actress,
is playing Tiffany in a movie about
the events of the previous Child's Play
movie, and Tiffany, the doll, decides
that she wants to take over Jennifer
Tilly, the actress's body which is like,
Ben: Nona, ten out of ten, no notes.
Jeremy: right, right,
Ben: like Ocean's Twelve, the plot
hinges on Julia Roberts looking like
Julia Roberts, but I actually love it.
Jeremy: Yeah, okay, so where,
where do we put Saloom?
Okay,
Emily: I'm gonna put it
above rare exports at least.
Ben: ye Yeah, I'd put it
put it no higher than 62.
Gremlins is too
Jeremy: that's the same
Ben: much fun, and Queen of Black
Magic gets too much credit for
legitimately being the movie that
freaked me the fuck out the most on this
podcast.
Jeremy: film.
Ben: Yeah,
like, in terms of just what is
the raw scariest movie, Queen
of Black Magic, I think, wins.
Emily: Yeah,
that
Jeremy: it's certainly like,
top five from a scariness
perspective, stuff we've watched.
Okay, so that brings us to the
final movie of, we did for February,
which is Tales from the Hood.
Ben: Oh, this is fun, but definitely
not gonna be a high ranker.
Emily: just in terms of craft, like,
that movie is charming as fuck.
I love that movie.
Ben: it's in that like scream three.
Jeremy: like it, it knows, it's not
trying to be any better than it is.
Ben: I definitely wouldn't, I'm, I
wouldn't rank it higher than scream three.
Emily: would.
Jeremy: I would rank it higher
than Scream 3, but not much.
I Find myself looking again in
this same area around Prometheus
and all the vampire movies.
Ben: would, you know, and based
on what we've said, I would, I
don't know, better watch out.
Tale from the Hood is definitely
a much, has a lot more to say
and much more interesting things
to say than better watch out.
Emily: and it's better than Prometheus.
Ben: Yes, it is better than Prometheus,
Emily: And I think it's
better than Rockula.
Jeremy: I, I think it's
better than Videodrone.
Emily: agree.
I agree.
I agree.
Ben: Yeah.
Yeah.
yeah, I'd put it above Titan.
Jeremy: I have a hard time going above
Ben: Event
Near Near Dark is really proving to
be, like, a real wall of, like, this,
like, kind of halfway dividing line.
Jeremy: Yeah.
it's sort of a halfway decent movie.
Ben: few movies have, like, have
crashed up on the shores of Near Dark.
Jeremy: yeah, I genuinely
think until about the last five
minutes, Near Dark is really solid
Emily: Yeah.
No, Near Dark is an
experience, and it, yeah.
It's almost a really good movie.
Jeremy: You know, award
winning
Ben: have one, it does have one of
the worst horror movie stingers.
Where it's like, oh no,
now the sister's a vampire.
I'm like, oh, you mean that thing
they know how to easily cure?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: I don't know, I feel like they'll
be able to take care of this problem.
Jeremy: Yeah, they cure vampirism by
giving them human blood, which is what
makes them vampires in the first place,
is that they take human blood.
The whole thing is very silly.
Emily: but they didn't, yeah, Who
Ben: Well clearly if you suck
it through the fangs instead of,
Emily: If you digest it, Scream 4.
Jeremy: now, okay, Scream
4, better than Scream 3?
Emily: I can't remember
what happens in Scream 4.
Is that the one where
they return to the town?
Ben: yes, and it's the
cousin that's the killer.
Jeremy: I think it's
better than 3, I think
it's
better than 2 also, if
I remember correctly.
Ben: That's a fair argument
to be made for that.
Emily: I still like, Scream 3
is the Hollywood one, right?
Ben: yeah.
Emily: Um,
Jeremy: The one where they blow
somebody up with a fax machine.
While the house that the fax
machine is in does not have power.
Ben: It's also a movie explicitly about
sexual assault in Hollywood that is
literally produced by Harvey Weinstein.
Jeremy: Yeah,
Emily: I mean, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah,
I think I'm gonna say that you're
Ben: I don't know if that's,
like, points against it.
It's just
Emily: No, I think it's, I think
it's points for the movie, honestly,
because it has the audacity, but
like, It's also not a very good movie.
I mean,
Ben: I do love it, but,
Jeremy: Yeah.
Scream Scream 4 is
definitely better than 3.
I think it's also better than 2,
Emily: It's absolutely better than 2.
Scream 2 is a snooze fez for me.
Jeremy: yeah, Scream 2 has an incredible
cast of people who will someday be
good at acting, yeah, it's just not,
Ben: Hey, we can admit we're
talking about Timothy Elephant.
Emily: Can we just, can we just
go ahead and rank 5 creams?
Jeremy: Well, Five Creams is coming up.
But
Emily: Scream 4 is not
better than La Llorona.
Absolutely not.
Jeremy: I mean, talk about
snooze fests, though.
Like,
Emily: La Llorona was, like, cool.
Ben: No, it was not.
La Llorona La Llorona was slow as fuck
and pulled punches against dictators.
Emily: You guys are just mean.
Jeremy: La Llorona was really
great for the last ten minutes.
Personally, I'd put
Scream 4 above Alien 3.
I don't like it as much as I like Ginger
Emily: I think, I think
I like it where it is.
It's good where it is right now.
I think it should stay there between
Black Christmas and La Llorona.
I also think that if we're gonna be
ranking a Scream movie that high.
It's gonna be 5 creams.
Like, it's gonna be Scream 5.
Definitely not
Ben: like Scream 5 and 6 more than
Jeremy: yeah,
Ben: 4.
Jeremy: yeah, 5 and 6 will
definitely be higher for me than 4.
Ben: Yeah, so,
Jeremy: I
mean, I
do think it's more coherent than Alien 3.
Ben: Oh yeah,
Emily: I
Ben: well Alien 3, I really, I do think
Alien 3 is absolutely an enjoyable
film, it's just so frustrating because
the whole prison angle should fit in
so well with the themes of the first
two and instead they just fucking make
a right turn right at the finish line
and fuck it all up with it's like, oh
actually they're like a cult and it's,
they're genetically engineered so they're
not like regular people or prisoners
and it's like, ah, you were, Yeah.
Yeah.
You were so close to how, just like,
furthering your exploration of how
capitalism makes people expendable.
Emily: I'm looking at the neighborhood
that we have Scream 4 in right now, too,
and I'm looking at, uh, Freaks, and The
Golem, and Shudder, and La Llorona, and
these are all movies that have, like,
really cool ideas that aren't really,
Ben: Scream 4's idea is what if
there was another Scream movie?
Emily: Yeah, and then, like
It's a more solid movie.
Like, a lot of these other movies
suffer from big issues, whether
it be in messaging or craft or
just like, delivery of the idea.
sO I think that I'm gonna go ahead and
agree that Scream 4 is probably better
than Freaks, and maybe even Alien 3.
Even though, you know, I've made it clear
how I feel about Alien 3, but again, I'm,
I am trying to keep in mind my own biases.
Ben: Yeah, it's
Jeremy: I can go either
side of Alien 3, honestly.
I like your next in Ginger Snaps better.
Ben: I agree with that.
Part of it just comes down to like,
while I definitely enjoy Alien 3,
there's just It's too hard to just
feel like it's a movie of missed
potential, whereas Scream 4, I'm just
like Nope, you fulfilled the potential.
Emily: Scream 4 did fulfill
the potential, I think.
Jeremy: There's a better movie
somewhere in Alien 3, but
Ben: Yeah.
Jeremy: that they ended up
Ben: yeah,
there's a
version yeah, exactly.
The version of Alien 3 in our
heads is definitely above Scream 4.
Unfortunately, the version
that they actually made
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: last 15 minutes of Alien
3 that are just like running
through identical hallways.
track of whatever the
Ben: So many interchangeable, like,
Jeremy: white
Ben: bald men yeah, like, bald British
men with, like, faces made of old shoes.
Emily: What about, okay,
so we have the menu next.
Jeremy: no,
Emily: No?
Jeremy: next.
Emily: Oh, shit.
Okay, so,
Ben: Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Emily: that movie is probably one of
the most upsetting, terrifying movies.
Like, I usually, like, I watch horror
movies all the time, yadda yadda yadda.
That movie made me upset for a week
Jeremy: Yeah,
Emily: and part of it.
Yeah, genuinely and like part of it was
Things about it that made me mad Which
is like I wish that there were different
things like things happen differently
in the movie and the movie had different
messages But it's still what it was
still made me like ill with the rancid
vibes the intentional rancid vibes.
Like, it just really did deliver on the
abject horror of what it was, uh, evoking.
So,
Ben: I feel like few movies have
so effectively and evocatively
captured the feeling of
overwhelming emotional devastation.
Emily: and
Ben: the brother being so just overwhelmed
with horror at the sister's head being
not where it's supposed to be, that
he just drives home and goes to bed
Jeremy: This movie makes
me
upset.
Ben: with me.
Emily: yeah, like, this,
Jeremy: upset.
Ben: Like, that level of emotional
Emily: Like, we're we've
watched Hard Candy.
We've watched The Babadook.
We've watched, I mean, like, La Llorona
is a movie about fucking genocide.
And, yeah, like, hereditary.
It's not fun.
It's absolutely well made.
it's a really, like, it's a
really well made horror movie.
speaking of elevated horror,
I'm gonna elevate it to up in
the 12s, in the 10s and the 12s.
Ben: Hereditary, yeah.
That's definitely the territory, like, I
think, like, we gotta start looking at.
Hereditary is very much one of
those movies where I'm like This
movie is incredible, I'm very glad
I watched it, I never want to see
it again for the rest of my life.
Jeremy: Yeah, I, I was already there
before we watched it this time, because
I was I had watched it the first time,
and I was like, I don't, I don't think I
ever want to see that again, and then we
talked about it so much on the show, so.
I was like, well, we have to actually
talk about this movie at some point
instead of just talking about it
while we talk about other things.
So Hard Candy right now is at 49.
We do
Ben: definitely, I mean, Hard Candy is
just like, super fucking upsetting, where
it's like, I feel like as a, especially
on like, not just top movies, but top
horror movies, there's so much more
that is truly horror and hereditary.
Emily: yeah, I think.
Ben: I said, hereditary, I feel like
it, I feel like we're looking at a top,
I feel like we're looking someplace
in, like, the top 25, probably.
Emily: absolutely.
Jeremy: I'm just looking here,
like, so, I know the Vivich has
been a dividing line for you all.
This is more, better than the Vivich.
Emily: I
I,
Ben: enjoyed,
Emily: yeah,
Ben: enjoy the Vivich more,
but I feel like hereditary
probably, yeah, does go above.
Emily: yeah, I, I agree.
Yeah, I think the hereditary is in,
Jeremy: 30 right now is tigers are not
afraid, so we're going above that still.
Emily: I think so.
Ben: Yeah,
Jeremy: 25 is Ex Machina, we
like it better than Ex Machina.
Emily: I mean, I don't like it
better than Ex Machina, but I
think it's scarier than Ex Machina.
Ben: I
think I have to agree.
I think aliens is, I think
aliens is gonna be where it comes
to an end, is where it stops.
I have trouble putting it above aliens.
Emily: I mean, yeah, I also have
trouble putting it below Jennifer's
body, but I know that I've
been to this.
Ben: not opening up that fucking
Emily: I know, this is not the
battlefield that I want to return to.
This love is not the battlefield.
Jeremy: so hereditary, I mean that
puts it at 25 being just below aliens.
Um,
Emily: I can
Ben: Cause I'm looking, I'm looking at
the movies we're scrolling up for, like,
Jennifer's Body, Evil Dead 2, House,
Psycho Goreman, like, Promising Young
Woman, Candyman, Rocky Horror, like
Emily: I just like looking at the
house, like, card, like, I like looking
at the thumbnail for house because
it makes me feel better, because
thinking about hereditary is just
generally, like, turns my stomach.
Ben: House is such, like,
comfort food next to hereditary.
Emily: I know, hereditary is like,
of, you know, a fast on nuts and, you
know, it's like, it's good for you,
Ben: I feel like House is one of those
movies where it's like, you can just
weed people out of your life with House,
where it's like, if you show House to
somebody and they're like, I didn't like
that movie, you can very easily go like,
I don't need to be friends with you then.
Emily: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ben: not the, not in that sense of
like, Oh, you didn't like a movie
that I like, so we can't be friends.
But more of, well, if you don't like
House, then you're just probably not a
very interesting person to start with.
Emily: I mean, yeah, if it's somebody
that, like, it's a new person,
like, okay, so you're on your
first date with somebody, I would
leave house to maybe the third date
Ben: House is a third date.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: a first date movie.
Emily: yeah, like, because the first
date is just like, you know, we
don't know if this is going to last.
We don't know if we're going to actually
have
Ben: will say, if,
Emily: personalities.
Ben: if you go out with somebody,
and it does end up being that
House is a first movie date, and
it's clickin Marry that person.
Emily: Yeah, maybe,
because, you know, that's,
Ben: find a first date
hausu person, marry them.
Jeremy: I think if you're
trying, like if you're, if you're
meeting a whole new group of people I
think house is a viable tool to just
like throw on and be like, let's see who
I want to become better friends with.
Emily: yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Jeremy: Alright, we're not ranking
House right now, we didn't actually
watch him in this order, but I
want to talk about it right behind
Hereditary, because we gave ourselves
a week in between our Reaster film,
Ben: call, good call
Emily: Yeah, we learned
from our experiences.
Midsommar is
Ben: I can say this right, I
can say this right off the bat.
Absolutely does not rank above hereditary.
Emily: No,
Jeremy: I, I enjoy it more than
Hereditary, watching it the second
time and it's horrible handling
of bipolar disorder just as sort
of a throwaway in the opening.
Bothers me, um, tremendously.
Emily: I'm gonna
Ben: I mean, I remember getting
to the point in Midsommar.
Well, I'm looking at my, like,
the timestamp going, like, This
motherfucker better jump off a
cliff, or I swear to God this movie.
Fortunately, that motherfucker jumped
off that cliff, and it was great.
They made a big splat.
I loved it.
Fuck yeah.
Emily: I don't think you're, wait, was
it the same person who jumped off the
cliff?
Ben: a random old person.
But by this point, like, it's been
an hour into the movie, and not
a goddamn thing has happened.,
Emily: I will repeat my main
gripe with Midsommar is that the
Swedish people do talk too much.
But overall, I mean, they
are pretty
Ben: says, shut it, Swedes.
Emily: No, I'm saying that if you
want a movie that represents Swedish
people, especially like the most if
you want to make them like the most
Swedish weird people, you're gonna have
to really cut back on the dialogue.
I think, yeah, I think I'm gonna
put Midsommar firmly between
After Midnight and The Descent.
Ben: Yeah, I can vibe with that.
Yeah.
Jeremy: yeah, that's, that's
actually where I just stuck it.
Um,
Emily: cool.
Jeremy: cause, uh, yeah,
I really, I really like the descent.
The descent has some of the same
Discomfort vibes, but it's much scarier.
In Midsommar there's just too many
things in there that bother me in
ways that they're not supposed to.
You know,
like, the stuff that bothers me in
Hereditary is supposed to bother me.
And some of the stuff that
bothers me about Midsommar is not.
Like, I really love the ending of
Midsommar in the same way that I kind
of hate the ending of Hereditary.
But, like, the ending of Midsommar is, is
Ben: Also,
Jeremy: That's my new, that's my
vibe for horror movies going forward
is kill the horrible boyfriend
Ben: also, how about Hereditary?
one of my favorite horror movie
devs has to be the mom throwing
the book in the fire and the dad
just immediately fully combusts
Emily: I
mean,
Ben: second.
Emily: he was less useful than the book.
He was
Ben: he
was, the dad was
Emily: book.
Ben: useless.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: though he was Gabriel Byrne.
I mean, you would
think being Gabriel Byrne
would be more useful.
Emily: Cool flex.
Jeremy: now between those two, we stuck
something with much, uh, much more
fun vibes, which is 2022's The Menu.
Ben: Oh, I love the menu.
To me, this goes right above Mayhem.
Emily: Yeah, it's a pretty high one.
I don't know if I'd put it that high.
Jeremy: So let's see, uh,
50 currently is Dracula.
I'd put it above Dracula.
Ben: I, I love this movie.
This is one of my favorite movies, like,
Emily: I wouldn't put the menu
above Promising Young Woman.
Jeremy: Let's see, Promising
Young Woman we have at
Emily: That's at 15.
Jeremy: 15.
Emily: But in terms of
like, a good, serious
Ben: Yeah, actually, you
know what, you're right.
I would not rank it above Candyman.
Candyman's a bit of a, yeah.
Jeremy: Now, I mean, that puts,
so right, right below where you're
talking about putting it, are
Psychogorman, House, Evil Dead 2, and
Ready or Not, and Jennifer's Body.
Do we
like the menu better than all of those?
Ben: honestly, yeah,
Emily: Hey, I think it's a
better movie than all of those.
yeah.
Ben: I truly, deeply,
deeply love this movie, The
Emily: it's a, it's very well done, it's
a fantastic movie, it really delivers
Ben: watch a shitload of
movies on this podcast.
This is the only one I've gotten
out of my way to just watch on my
own on like, three other occasions.
Jeremy: yeah.
the only one that I really hesitate
about in that group is Psychogorman.
Just because Psychogormon
is so fucking wild.
Ben: love Psycho Gorman, but yes,
I'm gonna say Promising Young
Woman, then The Menu feels correct.
Emily: Yeah, I think it's a pretty good,
like, line there, because Promising,
that's a, Promising, what, Young Woman,
good movie, The Menu, good movie,
Psychogorman, really fucking great,
not, like, I, yeah, Flip off, girl.
don't know.
Ben: man, flip off girl
goes to the menu restaurant.
I assume the restaurant's called the menu.
I don't know.
Emily: I can't remember what it's called.
It's called like, uptight
bullshit.
Ben: mean, Ralph Fiennes belittles
Nicholas Holt into killing himself.
Emily: yeah.
And
Ben: rules.
Emily: power.
Ben: It's fucking, like, it,
fuck, it, he crushes his dreams
and his sense of identity.
Aw, just Fuck, I love the menu.
And now I want s'mores, and burgers, and
s'moresburgers.
Emily: a, I want s'mores
burgers too, holy shit.
Jeremy: Okay, so that puts
us at 120 movies total.
We're moving in, uh, Guillermo
del Toro month, our April times.
So, uh, this started off with Kronos,
the, uh, zombie vampire grandpa.
Emily: I am definitely not
gonna be up in menu town for
that.
Ben: No.
Emily: so,
Jeremy: definitely enjoyable.
It's probably my least favorite of the
Ben: it's it's in the enjoyable, it's
You know, I'd probably put it Ooh,
not above near da not above near dark.
Emily: Okay.
Can't fucking find your dark anymore.
Ben: Yeah,
I
Jeremy: Videodrome.
Ben: yeah.
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
Jeremy: Above Titan?
Emily: Yeah.
Yeah.
It's definitely more charming.
Ben: It's got enough JoJo references.
Jeremy: Above or below
Tales from the Hood.
Ben: Tails from the hood, I
Emily: Yeah, I'd say below.
Jeremy: Yeah.
That's a, you know, for a first
outing, that's a damn good
Ben: Yeah.
Near dark is a very good dividing line,
Jeremy: Yeah.
There's two Oscar winning directors there,
Guillermo del Toro and Catherine Bigelow.
But,
Ben: man.
Can you, can you imagine Del Toro's
movie about killing bin laden?
Holy shit.
Emily: I'd rather not, honestly.
Like, I just, the vibes
would be so fucking
Ben: It, the the vibes would be, the
vibes would be so fucking cursed.
Emily: Yeah, like,
unless it was Unless it was like a
completely allegorical movie about,
like, a soldier going into his
mindscape and, like, finding about
Ben: the bin Laden with him.
Emily: killing Bin Laden and what it
is and what it means, but, like, it'd
be like Pinocchio and, like, it would
Ben: anyway,
the Devil's backbone.
And
I uh, truly great anti, I would go
below the witch, but definitely in that
Emily: Yeah,
Jeremy: Yeah,
Emily: go above or below the
Ben: Cause to me it's like, to me it's
coming down to the themes and I love the,
I think it's, I don't know, I feel like
the Vivitch is a little more compelling
and it's themes of suppression are kind
of just as compelling as it's war themes.
Emily: Yeah, it's definitely neighbors.
I think they should be,
Ben: Yeah.
Emily: yeah, they
Jeremy: I like The Devil's Backbone a
little more, but I know you guys are a
Ben: No, I'm okay with that, cause I, I
did really like Devil's Backbone.
And
again, and I, And I, feel, and I
give Del Toro a lot of credit for
making an anti war movie that truly
does not glamorize war in any way.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah, it's a really incredible
film that only moderately includes
dead babies in jars, because we
know how much that man loves dead
Emily: Oh yeah,
Ben: it's also pretty great when the guy
gets stabbed right in the armpit and it's
just like, oh, you're, you're just done.
Emily: Yeah.
Okay, so, Pan's Labyrinth.
I'm, I will fight.
We're gonna, let's go.
Jeremy: I mean above
above or below Devil's Backbone for you.
Emily: Above.
Jeremy: Okay, I know Ben had some mixed
feelings about it, largely due to it
having been built up quite a bit for them,
Ben: Yeah,
it's
Emily: Yeah, that's why
I'm, I'm,
Jeremy: but I would definitely put it,
like, we've got East Bayou right at 30,
I would definitely put it above that,
Emily: yeah
I agree.
Ben: That's fair.
Jeremy: Which puts us in that
real
contentious territory with
Hellraiser and Freaky and Ex Machina.
Emily: I
Ben: I'll give you a Hellraiser, but
I definitely, I definitely had more, I
definitely connected more with Ex Machina,
Emily: well Pan's Labyrinth,
Ben: I know this is my Jennifer's body,
though, when it comes to these rankings.
Emily: I think Pan's
Labyrinth at 30 is solid.
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean I can, I, I kind of
want to put it up at 25, which would be
above Aliens, but I know that's probably
Emily: I don't, I,
I Think it's good.
I think actually I would
put it above Hellraiser.
Ben: Yeah, oh yeah, I'll give
you, but yeah, I'll do above
Jeremy: yeah, just the, Hellraiser's
got a, Hellraiser's doing a lot for
House Shitty at, like, Is on a like,
technical level, that like, everything
is dubbed over, so they don't have
British accents for no fucking reason.
Like that, Pan's
Labyrinth is a beautifully
Ben: Yeah, it's not a particularly super
compellingly directed movie, except
for the scenes involving the Cenobites,
where it really fucking ups its game.
Emily: And then that, that, like, guy
regenerating himself with puppetry.
Fuckin
nuts.
Yeah,
it's incredible.
Jeremy: That's,
Emily: So, uh, speaking of wonderful
films, do you like fucking fish?
Tom Cruise's favorite movie?
Um,
Jeremy: fucking is Tom
Cruise's favorite movie?
Emily: I keep hearing that Tom
Cruise's, there's something
about Tom Cruise's fucking fish.
I don't know, it's like a, I,
I only heard it like third.
Yeah.
Jeremy: Can we agree between
Kronos and Devil's Backbone, right?
Ben: Actually, I missed this one.
Emily: Shape of Water?
Ben: Yeah.
Emily: Have you seen Shape of water?
Ben: actually have not.
Emily: Okay, well, it got an Oscar?
Ben: Yeah, so,
Emily: I kinda like the flex.
Ben: something.
Jeremy: I feel like it's better
than Crimson Peak, which is
at
Emily: That's true.
Jeremy: That's also Guillermo.
Emily: think it's
definitely better than Alien
Ben: I'm gonna assume it's better
than Crimson Peak, just, sight unseen.
Jeremy: I like it better
than Crimes of the Future,
Emily: yeah,
Jeremy: which is at 74 right now.
Emily: I mean, it does have a lot
of, we did discuss a lot of issues
with the movie, but in terms of like,
Ben: I imagine it's
Emily: I'm not going to,
Ben: better than the first Purge, and,
Emily: yeah, I mean, it did get
an Oscar, but I don't think it was
better than fucking Pan's Labyrinth.
Jeremy: Oh
Emily: Um, yeah,
I mean, it is a, is a
beautiful movie, yeah.
And really fucking weird, although I
think it, like, being up there with
the mummy and the queen of black
magic, I, yeah, I think I, agree.
Jeremy: I, yeah, I like, the mummy
is unquestion, well, I don't know
if it's unquestionably sillier,
but it takes itself less seriously.
Ben: It's what I do I mean, I think you
always gotta get Curse of the Mummy as
being one of the last great swashbucklers.
Emily: Also,
Ben: of Zorro, The Mummy, and
Curse of the Black Pearl, and then
Hollywood completely forgot how to
make a good action adventure film.
Emily: I
Jeremy: I love Curse of Black Pearl.
Emily: yeah,
Ben: the Black Pearl fucking rules.
I
Emily: I
like that, that the shape of water
does take, I think it's like, to its
credit and to its detriment that it
takes itself so seriously, it's part
of its charm, but yeah, I don't think
it's, I don't think it's better at
what it is than what the mummy is.
Um.
Ben: just gonna come with having
Jeremy: That's a crossover I would watch.
Like, the mummy shape of water crossover.
Emily: yeah, they are
kind of in the same, like,
Ben: It would be fun to see the Mermaid
and the Shape of Water Lady have a
double date with Rick and Evie O'Connell.
Emily: would
Ben: I don't know, I
haven't
Emily: the Shape of Water,
would that be considered, like,
a horror movie classic remake?
Because it's basically The
Creature of the Black Lagoon, but
you just, instead you fuck him?
Jeremy: I don't think, I don't
think it's close enough to the
plot of the Creature of the Black
Lagoon to consider it a remake.
Emily: Yes, but think about how
close Bram Stoker's Dracula the
movie is to Bram Stoker's Dracula,
or the original Dracula film.
Jeremy: Yeah, I mean,
it's much closer to the
Ben: You could have it say that
you could have the Black Lagoon
Monster be like, I swam through
an swamp of stars to reach you.
Jeremy: That's the real problem
with the 1930s Dracula, is it
doesn't have a cowboy in it.
Emily: Yeah.
And it's in the book.
Jeremy: yeah.
Ben: Yeah,
which,
Emily: doesn't have Carrie Elwes in it.
Ben: they had to go out of
their way to cut out the cowboy.
Emily: Yeah.
And
Jeremy: Now
Emily: mistake.
Ben: Which, to be fair, was
mostly because Bram Stoker
really wanted to fuck a cowboy.
Dude who's mad gay for cowboys.
Jeremy: that.
I mean, Dracula is really kind
of a list of characters that
Bram Stoker wants to fuck.
If we're being honest.
Ben: Poor Bram Stoker.
Poor Bram.
Poor, repressed, closeted Bram Stoker.
Jeremy: Okay, so this is where
we hit, AAPI, uh, History Month.
We started talking about our, uh, Asian
American Pacific Islander directors.
We have, uh, The
Invitation by Karen Kusama,
Ben: A movie I saw was fine
and have barely thought about
since we did our episode on it.
Jeremy: Movie
Emily: seen it.
Jeremy: party ever.
Emily: Yeah, I,
I,
Ben: they didn't play charades.
Jeremy: What do we think, guys?
Ben: I mean, it was a
good, it was a good movie,
but,
Emily: this is, YouTube.
Because I haven't actually
seen this one yet.
Ben: Like, somewhere in
the middle of the pack.
Like, above Prometheus,
because it's a good movie, but,
um,
Jeremy: It's so boring, though.
Like,
Ben: I definitely wouldn't
rank it above Kronos.
Or, honestly, I would rank it,
Emily: iS it boring?
Here's a question for you.
Is it the kind of boring that
makes, like, is it hunger boring?
Jeremy: Here's the thing.
It is like Hunger in that it is boring.
But it doesn't have sexy gay vampires.
Ben: oh yeah, it doesn't have,
it doesn't have anybody that's
Susan Sarandon or David Bowie.
Jeremy: Yeah, so I, uh, what do we
think about just below the hunger?
Ben: like that.
Emily: peace with that.
Yes.
Ben: I like that, yeah, that feels right.
Emily: All right,
which brings us to,
Jeremy: Okay, so that puts that at 99
for the moment and that, that brings us
to, what we do in the
shadows, the
film.
Ben: Yeah
it's so weird to think about
now in context of this show.
Jeremy: yeah, I mean, it's, you know,
it's a bit punchier than the show just
because they do it all in two hours, but
or an hour and a half, I think, but, uh,
Ben: and it's really just like,
Jeremy: further reaching,
Ben: yeah, but it is fucking
wonderful, and I really love it.
It's
Emily: I think it's in
the, it's around 50 for me.
Jeremy: you know, let's see,
Ben: was a horror comedy list, it'd
Jeremy: knight,
Ben: would not put it above Godzilla,
uh, It's so fucking funny though.
Jeremy: I would put it above
Midsommar, which is at 48,
Emily: yeah,
Ben: You know, I think I'd,
I think I'd put it between
Perfect Blue and Velvet Buzzsaw.
Emily: Okay.
Yeah, I definitely like it
more than Velvet Buzzsaw.
I think it's definitely
pointedly less up its ass
Ben: Yeah, Perfect Blue is
also pretty epic ass, but you
gotta give flowers to Satoshi
Emily: Yeah, you should, and I will.
Jeremy: yeah,
that,
Ben: the Kon.
Jeremy: that works for me, 46,
Ben: And now, okay, so if Invitation is
a movie I haven't thought about since
we did the episode, now comes a movie
that I think about literally every day.
Emily: Jesus Christ, I don't know.
I'm, they're so, this movie,
I,
Ben: It.
It's ranked number one in the movies.
In which movies are most malignant?
Emily: yeah, I mean, you could say that
about a lot of these, like, the Ginger
Snaps is the most Ginger Snaps that
Ginger Snaps could, well, actually,
no, it isn't.
Ben: malignant.
Emily: Okay, Tails, yeah, I think you're
in the right, you're in the right,
definitely not
Ben: ginger Snap.
Gingersnaps could have
had more offscreen Dead
Emily: stop.
Stop putting it up.
It's below after midnight.
Ben: Can we again appreciate that?
Gingersnaps is a scene where
people are playing like field
hockey and nobody notices the dead
dog lying in the middle of The
Emily: The giant fucking
Ben: trips
over it.
Emily: dead husky.
It's really sad.
I don't want to think
about dead dogs right now.
Jeremy: Emily, can we, can we take a
moment to appreciate that this is a
movie where a woman doesn't realize that
occasionally she turns backwards and
becomes a karate fighting supervillain
Ben: Yes.
Emily: It's not better
than Tigers Are Not Afraid.
Absolutely not.
Stop.
What's
Ben: We're in it!
Emily: Stop!
No.
Don't.
Ben: one!
Jeremy: I mean, I feel like
there's a lot of similarities
between this and The Thing,
Emily: No.
Jeremy: I don't think it's top ten.
I don't think it's better than
Nope, which it would have to
be
Emily: Absolutely not.
Ben: I mean
Wait, I mean The prison scene
alone ranks it somewhere.
Emily: you're just putting it above
Jennifer's body just to fuck with me.
Jeremy: You don't think
it's
better than Jennifer's body, Emily?
Emily: um,
Ben: No, it's not
that in
the general Okay.
Okay, Malignant, down, okay, let's,
Jeremy: Okay, below
Alien, let's see,
below,
Pan's Labyrinth,
Ben: Pan's Labyrinth,
Emily: I would put it below Hellraiser.
I would put it below It Follows.
I would put it below The Devil's Backbone.
What's below The Devil's Backbone?
The Vavitch?
Definitely below The Vavitch.
Ben: we got, not too far, uh, okay,
we
Emily: I think that's, oh, wait, I think,
Ben: yeah,
I
like that, yeah.
Jeremy: mean, it
certainly right to be near
Bram Stoker's Dracula.
Ben: no,
Emily: Bram Stoker's
Dracula.
Ben: put it above Bram Stoker's Dracula,
and let
me explain why,
let me explain why, let me
throw my, Into the ring.
Now, what I loved the most about
Bram Soakers Dracula was how
fucking unhinged Francis Ford
Coppola was making this movie.
Emily: Yeah?
Ben: as he is, I feel like James
won making malignant, might
have somehow been more unhinged.
Jeremy: Francis Ford Coppola
drunkenly skipped so James
Wan could do a samurai run for
Ben: yeah,
Jeremy: Do
Ben: Naruto, he did a.
Emily: run?
Ben: He did a, yeah, James
Wan did a Naruto run,
like.
Emily: that's that, I think, by
rule of influence, Bram Stoker's
Dracula should go above Malignant.
Also,
Ben: Jeremy, I think you're
gonna have to be the tiebreaker
Emily: how many I don't trust
Jeremy to be the tiebreaker.
Ben: I do have to admit, Graham
Stoker's Dracula, I do give a lot
of credit to Coppola for having the
balls to be like, going to the special
effects company and being like,
I want everything done in camera.
And they said, that's impossible.
And he said, fuck you, you're all fired.
My son's gonna do the special effects.
And in that bit of shameless
nepotism, Guy fucking nailed it.
Every effect in camera, and
they all look incredible.
Jeremy: I will put Bram Stoker's Dracula
above Malignant just to put Malignant
between Bram Stoker's Dracula and the fly.
Emily: I think that is accurate.
I
think That
I
I
Jeremy: it belongs.
Emily: Yes, correct.
Jeremy: It's truly
unhinged section of the list.
Ben: Yeah, oh yeah.
Oh yeah, this is the part of the list
where we're like, Yeah, directors,
what crazy thing do you wanna do?
What's that, Joel Schumacher?
You wanna get the most oiled up
shirtless guy you can find and just
let him play the sax for three minutes?
Go for it!
You do you, bro!
Emily: Bless.
Ben: can you make Keith or Sutherland?
I guess we'll find out.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: Alright, so let's see
How did we finish off this month?
Oh,
yeah, that's right.
knock at the
cabin.
Our bridge from AAPI to Pride, I
Ben: Woo!
Woo!
Emily: So, I'm seeing, I don't think
we're gonna have to move it off of
the screen that we're looking at.
Yeah, there
we
go.
Jeremy: Um,
Emily: Definitely, it's not better
than Welcome to Raccoon City.
I mean, I, the only reason I would
put it above No Face Benny and, and
Craft Legacy is just Dave Bautista.
But it is a movie about how
you have to kill God's most
precious gaze to save the world.
Jeremy: yeah.
Ben: I can't put it in good
conscience above Resident Evil.
Emily: the Mia Jovovich Resident
Evil?
Ben: no, it's definitely
above Welcome to Raccoon City.
Emily: It's below Sukob, and it's
below Friday the 13th, because at
least Friday the 13th was influential.
Ben: Yeah.
Jeremy: I gotta say, it's
better than Bad Hair.
Bad Hair is another well intentioned
but horrible movie that was not, that
did not have Dave Bautista in it.
Ben: God, if, if, Bad Hair had been any
one of the three movies it was trying to
be, it would be, all three of them would
have been ranked much higher on the list.
But trying to be all three of them at the
same time was just a fucking disaster.
Emily: So,
Dayslash
Jeremy: and,
Emily: Them is now at 127.
Jeremy: we followed that one up with They
Slash Them, a movie that, I, bothered me
so much that I both didn't want you guys
to have to watch it for the show, and
Ben: nope, I
think, think you nailed it.
I think above don't breathe
and old and that's it.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: No, no, no further
rankings necessary on that one.
Jeremy: although it should, pretty
pretty please, never ever feel like
it's less than fucking perfect.
I, I do have to say that.
Ben: I forgot that scene was in the movie!
I fucking repressed that shit
so
Emily: the fuck are you even talking
about?
Jeremy: with
Ben: did a musical number and
they
Emily: that's with the power slide!
How could I
Ben: slide
Emily: it was a terrible film.
Ben: and the fucking angelic
fucking honey pot honey trap
Emily: I know.
I know.
Alright, so Hellraiser 2022 is really
good.
I kinda wanna put it above
the original Hellraiser.
I know that
Jeremy: makes more sense
than the original Hellraiser.
Emily: yeah.
Jeremy: I don't know.
This is where it starts to
get dicey here in the 30s.
Ben: Yeah, that's this is a
lot of movies that it's like
Jeremy: cause it's, I would not say
it's better than Pan's Labyrinth.
Emily: no.
Ben: yeah I'm
like
Emily: I think I would like to flex.
I would like to be that person.
I would like to start that
fight with the horror bro.
that says the original Hellraiser
is better, because they're wrong.
And this actually is like,
it is a
Ben: I agree.
Emily: on most
Ben: I agree that I think the new one's
better It's just like damn for whatever
reason putting the first one up that
high Felt okay where I'm looking at
the new hellers just being like damn.
That's a lot of Movies, I
really love that I'm, that it's
above,
Emily: I, yeah, I'm gonna
say we can't rank it lower
than the original Hellraiser.
And I,
Ben: yeah, you know what, I, I get
what you're saying, like, I feel like
that's too high, but I feel like we
boxed ourselves into a corner, given
the rankings of the original Hellraiser.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: they're
Ben: I agree with, I agree with
you, it's better than the 87, so,
Jeremy: mean, I, I rated it higher
there myself, just in stars, so,
uh, I can't really argue with that,
Ben: I think, uh, yeah, I think that's
the only place we can put it without
being, I don't know, bad art listers.
Emily: Alright, bodies, bodies, bodies,
bodies, bodies, and more bodies.
Jeremy: I don't even know
how to rank this movie, I
Ben: This was a wei
oh, that's a weird one.
I mean, you
Emily: I, I, do.
Hear me out.
It's either between Psychogorman
and Promising Young Woman,
or,
Ben: feels high.
Emily: yeah, or between, uh, like
somewhere in the Velvet Buzzsaw
Descent Happy Death Day area.
Ben: That feels
right.
Jeremy: that, Yeah.
that does feel right, it feels like the
same sort of amount of satire as Velvet
Buzzsaw,
Ben: around happy deaf day.
Emily: Yeah,
Ben: Yeah.
Emily: is it better than a
girl walks home alone at night?
Not in my opinion, but
Jeremy: I mean, I certainly laughed more
at it than A Girl Walks Home Alone At
Emily: well, yeah
Jeremy: I was supposed to laugh at
A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night,
Emily: of a girl who walks
home alone at night that you
definitely
were
Ben: it I would put it
Emily: at the lamp.
Ben: I would put it between what we
do in the shadows and Velvet Buzzsaw.
Yeah.
Emily: Yeah, I would never I
would never put it above what we
do in the shadows ever in my life
Jeremy: yeah, so that's,
yeah, lower than Girl
Walks
Home Alone at
Ben: does have one of my favorite,
when we do get the reveal of how
Pete Davidson died, I will say it's
one of my favorite death scenes
in all of, in like, fucking horror
Jeremy: Y'all, I watched this movie
with Alicia after we talked about
it on the podcast, and she was so
angry at the end of this movie.
She was so
Ben: Oh, that
Jeremy: Bodies, Bodies, Bodies.
But they, yeah, when they revealed
that there was no killer, and
they had all just each other,
Ben: I legitimately
Emily: I want to do it again
with her Like I want to see
what
Ben: really,
Emily: again with her just to
Ben: I truly feel like that was
the perfect ending, though, for
it, that there was no killer.
I'm not gonna lie, that's the exact
twist I was, I was, what, I don't know
what it says, but that was exactly
what I was hoping the twist would be.
Jeremy: Now, if there was one
movie that we watched that I
will fight for in this, it is
Emily: Yeah, sissy, I
Ben: yeah.
Emily: the high word,
like, with the, the freaky
Jeremy: Yeah,
Emily: yeah, yeah,
Ben: Yeah, sissy.
Jeremy: I might go, like, right now
I put it at 28, which, like, is right
above Freaky, and that feels I might
Ben: Do we like it
more
do we
Jeremy: though.
Ben: than hereditary?
Emily: Where's hereditary again?
Jeremy: Redditary's at
26, so two above it.
It's only separated from
Redditary by Ex Machina.
I
Emily: actually, yeah, I do,
yes, we put it above hereditary.
We put it above Nightmare
Before Christmas.
We put it above Jennifer's body.
I think it sits right above Ready or Not.
Yeah, mm hmm, mm hmm, mm hmm,
Ben: hmm,
Am I, I would vote for below Ready or
Not, but I feel like I'm gonna get,
I'm gonna get outvoted on this one.
Emily: I mean, you, yeah, I
mean, you could still vote.
We will outvote you.
But
Jeremy: mean, I,
Emily: vote.
Ben: I I
Jeremy: Ready or Not
a lot.
Ben: Sissy.
Emily: I think, I like Sissy
better than Ready or Not, just
because of the moves that, like,
Sissy is a little bit more ballsy.
Ready or Not's
a fun
Jeremy: Yeah, and, and it is,
as gay as I wanted Ready or Not
to be, honestly.
Um,
Ben: gay.
Jeremy: yeah, that's
I
Ben: So are we, are we saying
it, it gets the, the gay tips,
you know, the win by gayness?
Jeremy: I think right under Evil Dead
2, which seems, I feel like those go
together, House and Evil Dead 2 and Sissy
and that sort of like, oh, and Psycho
Ben: We've got with Psycho
Goreman House and Evil Dead 2, and
honestly, the menu are this real
nice just cluster of horror comedy.
One of these days, we gotta do
Tucker and Dale versus evil because
that's another horror comedy classic.
Jeremy: And then you go up one
more and it's Promising Young
Woman, a movie that is definitely
Ben: Oh, yeah, no, the
comedy comes to a hard stop.
Emily: Well, and I think that we're,
once we get to Shauna the Dead,
that's gonna mix it up a bit up there.
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: All right, so, five
cream, or just scream or,
Ben: So, I lo I need I wanna like, be
strategic in how I rank this one, cause
I know I like it more than Scream 4, but
I know it's definitely below Scream 6.
Jeremy: yeah, I have, I agree.
Um,
Ben: 5!
Like, is
made
Emily: Scream
though?
Ben: No.
Emily: not better than Scream?
Ben: No.
No.
It, it might be better than,
yeah, no, definitely not better
than the original Scream.
Jeremy: So we have the
original scream at 68, which
seems
really
Ben: put it below, kind of, yeah.
We might have to re
evaluate that at some point.
I would put it, given
that, I don't know, I would
put
Emily: I actually, I think, I
think, it's good next to 96 Scream.
I think it's better than
Ben: Do You Like It More
Than The Mummy, though?
Emily: uh, no.
Jeremy: Yeah, I don't like it more
in the moment either, but I think
I like it more than Shape of Water.
Um,
Ben: with that ranking.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: put it right at 70, which
still, I mean, I think I do like
6 better than the original scream,
which would give us plenty of room
Emily: I'm stoked.
Ben: Yeah, no, 6 is really good, and
hey, I will give credit to 5, um, Able.
The death of Dewey is one of the most
affecting scenes I've ever seen in
a horror movie, and that is, and I
think, and that does speak to something
that I think has worked to the Scream
franchise's benefit, and also something
I really love, like, just from a thematic
standpoint, Scream is not about the
killers, Scream is about the survivors.
Emily: Yeah.
Jeremy: yeah,
I do really like that, and I
like that it really introduces
the core 4, which honestly,
um, I like.
I like.
them better than the original group
of survivors, so, I think they're
Ben: what you will,
Jeremy: representative.
Ben: what you, I think you'll probably
find, Emily, after watching Scream
6 is that Scream 5 becomes better in
light of Scream 6, just because now
you actually care about the characters.
Because now they've gone from like,
oh, okay, sure, new crop of kids,
to like, that's the core four.
Emily: Yeah.
So the torch has been passed.
Ben: Yeah.
Like, the six is really where
it is like, it is fully passed.
Jeremy: I don't
Emily: Excellent.
Jeremy: movie,
Ben: No, exactly, yeah.
If anything, Sydney probably
would have brought it down.
Emily: I think they, uh,
successfully kind of phased them out.
So.
Ben: Though, I will say, now granted,
I did see Scream 6 at like a special,
like, early, all gay people screening.
But, the two biggest fucking,
like, I've said it before,
Courtney Cox appearing on screen?
The only time I've ever seen a Thea
Later moment get more applause was
Captain America picking up Mjolnir.
It's Cap with Mjolnir, and
then Courtney Cox just fuckin
being on screen in Scream Sex.
Emily: Incredible.
for her.
Ben: Nobody is ever mothered as hard
as Courtney Cox does in Scream Sex.
Emily: Oh, shit.
Well, good to know.
Alright, well, hopefully by next
time, I will know specifically
what you're talking about.
Ben: Yes.
Jeremy: Yeah, so next time we can pick
up talking about this array of completely
unrelated but amazing movies that we,
we watched in between Pride and Hispanic
Heritage Month and Megan, Hocus Pocus,
They Live, and Shaun of the Dead.
Ben: all all bangers.
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: banger, banger, banger, banger.
Emily: Bangers, bangers,
Jeremy: No
mash
Emily: Thank goodness.
Ben: Damn, I was, was also trying to
figure out how to make a bangers and
mash like British restaurant joke.
Couldn't quite, Couldn't
get the wording right,
couldn't quite
figure it out.
Oh, fuck, that's like, that should be
like, a great for like, a radio station.
You get like a Br You get like a
British DJ, he's like, All, like,
all bang is no mash, but in a British
accent that I didn't even attempt.
Emily: As long as they
don't have the Monster Mash.
Jeremy: You just have to have the DJ say
Emily: station.
Jeremy: bangers, no
mash in a British accent.
Emily: All
bangers, no mash.
Jeremy: just say in a
British accent, you know,
Ben: It is fucked up for like, a four
year old to be like, Hey, it's my
birthday, can you just not play one song?
And they're like, no, fuck you,
four year old, live in terror.
Emily: I'm so sorry that
this happened to you.
Ben: Like it's a very silly story,
but at the same time it's like,
fuck you Montessori school employee.
Jeremy: it's the true
Transylvania twist, you know?
Emily: Yeah.
Ben: AAAAAAAA
Alright, do we?
Yes.
Jeremy: All right.
So that's, that's it for this round.
So, uh, we will finish up next
time and assuming we need it at
this point in the recording uh,
until next time, stay horrified.