Dating and God's Timing: What You Need to Know with King Tyren (Part 1)

Why does it feel like God is making you wait? In this episode, we unpack the truth about God’s timing in dating— and why His plans are never on accident. We’re getting real about what men actually look for, how to show interest without losing your dignity, and what the purpose of marriage is for. If you’ve ever questioned if you’re doing something wrong or why God hasn’t brought the right person yet, this one's for you. Don’t miss this raw and honest conversation with King Tyren (part 1).

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Micaela: 00:00

Man, it was a realization for me, though, that I had, like, a lot of anger towards God. Like, I was angry because I felt like I was living my life in a way that God would want me to live, and I felt like my circumstances weren't reflecting the outcome I thought I should have. I felt like the waiting season was because I'm not doing something correct.

Tyren: 00:19

Oh, yeah. I think that's where the I think that's where the enemy always attacks in your mind. Yeah. Delay does not mean denial.

Micaela: 00:25

The reason for marriage is sanctification, though. So any reason that we have that's aside from sanctification, if it's companionship, I mean, those things are good. Yeah. But, ultimately, I think that it would fall out of the context of what God created marriage to be, which is an example of the church.

Tyren: 00:40

Don't get weary in good doing for in due season. You know?

Micaela: 00:44

You'll reap the benefits?

Tyren: 00:45

Yes.

Micaela: 00:48

Tyrone, thank you for being on.

Tyren: 00:50

Thank you for having me on.

Micaela: 00:51

Absolutely. I start every single podcast with 1 how we met, which meeting you was 100% an answered prayer. For anyone who I have not yet told, whenever I started the podcast, I was really struggling with audio. I couldn't figure out how to get the two pieces to go together. Long story short, I went to Chad GPT.

Micaela: 01:12

I went to friends. I went to YouTube, like, everything, and I couldn't figure it out. Yeah. And I got so frustrated that I was literally like, alright, God. If you want this to work, like, help me send somebody.

Micaela: 01:23

I don't know what to do. Yeah. Close my laptop, put it away. And next day at church, you're sitting behind me.

Tyren: 01:32

There we go.

Micaela: 01:32

And I was literally, like, just that still quiet voice that was like, you should you should ask him his name. I was like, hey, like, what's your name? And you're like, oh, I'm Tyron, blah, blah. We started talking. Turns out you make content.

Micaela: 01:43

Turns out you've had had a podcast. Turns out you use the exact same thing that I use. And it's like

Tyren: 01:48

I'm sorry for interrupting real quick. But every time I think about that, I'm just like, God is amazing. Like, how he allowed that to happen, your request to God, and he fulfilled it. 100%. And then, yeah, it's just you turning around and just speaking

Micaela: 02:05

Mhmm.

Tyren: 02:05

And everything happened.

Micaela: 02:07

Yeah. It was literally and it was so funny because you saw my face whenever you said that you had a podcast. I was literally

Tyren: 02:12

like eyes. I almost popped out your head. I'm like, woah.

Micaela: 02:14

Yeah. Because I was like, no way. Like, I just prayed this yesterday. Like, God sent me somebody

Tyren: 02:19

Yesterday too. Right? You said?

Micaela: 02:21

The day before. Yeah.

Tyren: 02:21

The day before. That's insane.

Micaela: 02:23

It was so cool. So And

Tyren: 02:24

then we know what else is weird real quick because, that day, I felt like something was gonna happen too.

Micaela: 02:31

Really?

Tyren: 02:31

Yes. I'm not making it up. Yeah. I felt like I was going to church, and I was feeling good. I was like, something's gonna something's gonna happen today.

Micaela: 02:38

Dude, I love that.

Tyren: 02:38

I sat down and there we go. Yeah. Wow.

Micaela: 02:40

Yeah. Praise God, dude. It was it was such a blessing. And the funniest thing is it was literally, like, 3 clicks. It was the easiest thing in the entire world.

Micaela: 02:47

So the fact that I couldn't find that online too.

Tyren: 02:49

Yeah. Like, I was

Micaela: 02:50

like, what the heck?

Tyren: 02:51

And this is silly how they have all these, like, YouTube, channels and videos of how to do things and, like, you can't find something like that. It's hard to find something like that online. You know, it's just like Yeah. No. It's so hard.

Micaela: 03:04

For sure. Answered prayer. Like, it was absolutely one of the coolest moments ever since moving here. So Wow. I'm super thankful to to have you on and that that we even met that way.

Micaela: 03:14

Like, it was a god thing.

Tyren: 03:15

So Yeah.

Micaela: 03:16

For sure. But, another way that I always something I always share with every guest that's on here is how I see Christ in them.

Tyren: 03:24

Yeah.

Micaela: 03:25

And for you, it has been your tenacity. Like, that is one of the characteristics I've seen in Christ is, like, it doesn't matter how many rejections. It doesn't matter how many people hate him. It doesn't matter how many obstacles come. Like, it's just like, alright.

Micaela: 03:39

What's the next best step? Like, let me just keep going. And that's something that I've seen with you and even heard in your personal testimony of, like, how you've come to something, and it was like, okay. Like, this isn't ideal. I have 2 options.

Micaela: 03:51

You know what I mean? Like, either I can keep going and make it work and do the best that I can or give up and just be, like, whatever. The world's against me.

Tyren: 03:58

Right.

Micaela: 03:58

And that has been one of the characteristics that have shown through so clearly with you that I since like, the more that I spend time with you, the more that I see it's, like, you just keep getting up, and you're a very encouraging and faithful person. So

Tyren: 04:12

Thank you.

Micaela: 04:12

Absolutely.

Tyren: 04:13

Thank you. I just, and I really appreciate you and those words. I really do. I just don't believe in giving up. And I just believe that if you really want something in life, then you just keep going until you get it.

Tyren: 04:27

You know? And, you said something about rejections. Like, I think I told you before, but rejections to me is like, I look if anything, I look at at it in a positive manner. I don't look at it as something negative because it leads me to where God really wants want me to be or who he wants in my life.

Micaela: 04:47

So

Tyren: 04:47

I just let it roll off my shoulder, and, I don't care how many stumbling blocks are in my way. I just keep going. You know? Yeah. I just keep going.

Tyren: 04:54

I can't stop. You know?

Micaela: 04:55

That's good. Yeah. And

Tyren: 04:56

it's Yeah. Consistency is everything.

Micaela: 04:58

So 100%. I've heard that. It reminds me of that quote too that says, like, every villain and hero has the same back story. It's, like, what they do with it. Yes.

Micaela: 05:05

And, like, we can let the rejections or the circumstances we grew up in

Tyren: 05:10

Failures, anything. Yeah.

Micaela: 05:11

Exactly. The people that are saying you can't do it, you could be like, yeah. Sure. Okay. Then I'm stuck there forever.

Micaela: 05:16

Or you can become the hero and, like, use that. Instead of saying Alex Ramosi has a great quote, and he says, you can either say, because of all these things, I couldn't do it, or look at everything I overcame to get to where I'm at today.

Tyren: 05:27

Yes. I have experienced so much doubt in, yeah, in my life from people, various people.

Micaela: 05:33

Mhmm.

Tyren: 05:33

And, it's it has made me stronger.

Micaela: 05:38

Mhmm.

Tyren: 05:38

So that's why now it's just like, when someone doubt me or don't believe in whatever I tell them about what I wanna do, it don't it don't affect me anymore. Totally. Yeah.

Micaela: 05:48

Yeah. Yeah. You

Tyren: 05:49

can last thing, and I'm like, keep going. You can either look at a glass of a half glass of water as almost filled or almost empty.

Micaela: 05:57

Right. Right. Yeah. It's all perspective. It's It is.

Micaela: 06:00

There's a quote that Andrew Tate had with, George Jenko. And George Jenko asked him, he said, you have 2 wolves, 1 in the light, 1 in the dark. Which one survives? And And he said, it's the one you feed. And I was like, oh, god.

Tyren: 06:12

That's a deep. Yeah. I heard that before. That's a deep.

Micaela: 06:15

I was like, that's so true. Like, it literally doesn't matter if one's in the light or one's in the dark. It's literally the one that you decide to feed.

Tyren: 06:22

Yeah.

Micaela: 06:22

So, yeah, it's the same with perspective. You know? Half full, half empty kinda thing. So Exactly. 100%.

Micaela: 06:28

Well, we're gonna start with my recent existential crisis I had at church.

Tyren: 06:32

Okay.

Micaela: 06:34

Tuesday. Let's see. It was the porch last last week. And I think it kinda goes along with this interview anyways because we're talking about dating, love, stuff like that. And, man, you weren't there, but I, the sermon was all about, like, God's love and grace and how much he cares for us and seeks us, and and it doesn't matter what we do, that he loves us.

Micaela: 06:54

And it's like one of those moments where I was like, man, this is head knowledge, but not heart knowledge. Like, it was the type where it was just, like, kinda sobbing afterwards. You know what I mean? You're like, oh god. Like, I hope there's not a greeting after this.

Micaela: 07:10

Like, you're just kinda, like, trying to collect yourself, stuff

Tyren: 07:12

like that. Right.

Micaela: 07:13

But, man, it was a realization for me, though, that I had, like, a lot of anger towards God. Like, I was angry because I felt like I was living my life in a way that God would want me to live, and I felt like my circumstances weren't reflecting the outcome I thought I should have. Yeah. And it was such a wake up call, such a wake up call where I was like, oh, man. Like, God's teaching me a lot in this moment.

Micaela: 07:37

And it's Yeah. I'm I'm adding expectations on top of promises that he's had, and so it was like, I should have it by now. And I was like, no. That's not the case. So Right.

Micaela: 07:46

Anyways, I wanted to open with that because, I know that you said you had something you wanted to add to that. Because we were talking before the podcast, and you're like, wait. Stop. We need to record.

Tyren: 07:55

Yeah.

Micaela: 07:56

So, that's why I'm sharing that story. I don't know what direction you kinda had something to add on to. So was there anything else you wanted me to share about my side?

Tyren: 08:05

You know, is, you know, just thinking about what you shared and everything, I can relate that to my life as well. Sometimes we want, you know, the hand of God to move right now whenever we we want him to move. But I think I think God moves through us being patient and waiting, you know. And look, so I know it's probably a cliche term. Everybody says that be patient and wait.

Tyren: 08:41

But I think that's what God won't really wants to see. Who was it in the bible? I know was it Joseph that waited, I believe, 30 some years? Yeah. I think he believed he he waited some 30 some years before he met his wife.

Micaela: 08:58

I laugh because you bring up Joseph, and it's a story that God keeps bringing up over and over again for this exact scenario in my life. So I think it's so funny that you bring up Joseph. Yeah. But something that God was teaching me through that story is because I felt like the waiting season was because I'm not doing something correct. And I had to realize he, like, walked me through Joseph's story, and it was like, Joseph was sold into slavery.

Micaela: 09:22

Like, sure, he probably added to it being, like, a snobby kid that thought he knew everything. Like, his siblings didn't like him because of that because he's saying, like, oh, you're gonna all bow down to me. Like, yeah. Sure. That might have that, but it wasn't his fault.

Micaela: 09:32

Like, he shouldn't he would it it wasn't he didn't deserve to be sold into slavery. No. Yeah. And then the moment whenever he was trying to be faithful to God and Potiphar's wife framed him because she wasn't he wouldn't sleep with her Yes. That wasn't Joseph's fault.

Tyren: 09:45

That wasn't.

Micaela: 09:46

And then he went to prison for And she lied. Oh, no. Literally. Yeah. And he went to prison for 2 years, and it literally says Joseph was forgotten.

Micaela: 09:53

Like, he was forgotten in that moment. And it was, like, not by God, clearly. But and then whenever he was in prison, he faithfully it it says that God blessed the work that was at his hands, and he faithfully translated 2 dreams of 2 different people there.

Tyren: 10:07

Yes.

Micaela: 10:08

Still nothing. Like and so what God was something that God showed me through Joseph's story is, like, if you're waiting and for me, it's like in the dating season, like singleness, like, waiting to find that person. It was like, it's not just because God's, like, punishing me or I'm not doing something right. Like, it could clearly be, like, I'm following and being obedient to God, but things are still happening

Tyren: 10:30

Yeah.

Micaela: 10:30

To either prevent that or it's not time for some reason. Yeah. And so Joseph's story was super helpful to me to realize, like, okay. Like, just because I don't have what I would love to have right now, which is a family and kids, it doesn't mean that it's because I'm not doing enough. And so that's kind of where I came to the end of myself yesterday because it was like, God, I'm doing everything for you.

Micaela: 10:50

I'm, like

Tyren: 10:50

Yeah.

Micaela: 10:51

Dedicating everything. Everybody I meet, I'm talking about Jesus. Like, I'm trying to bring everybody to church. Like, you know, like Yeah. You're trying to stack up your goods and your bads.

Micaela: 10:58

You

Tyren: 10:58

know? Exactly.

Micaela: 10:59

And then it was a realization where it's like, one, I can't work for something that I didn't even earn. You know what I mean? Like, God's favor is not something that we work for. It's something that Yeah. We get by grace.

Tyren: 11:10

Yeah.

Micaela: 11:10

But then the relationship side is, like, just because you're in a waiting season doesn't mean that you're not doing something correct. It could quite possibly just be part of the story for God to get, one, the glory, but also for you to be able to, 1, either keep this thing or for it to be a blessing to you or maybe God's working on the other person too. Yeah. It doesn't always have to be something that's, like, inward. You know?

Tyren: 11:31

Yeah. Something funny is that my pastor, the recent message that he gave on Sunday, he said he said, delay does not mean denial. Yeah. And I look at that, I'm like, wow. Just because your life is delayed, just because, you know, you're a, you're not, early bloomer or, your your all your peers or friends or whoever the case may be are getting things before you, and you're like, oh, I'm faithful to God, but I clearly know that they're not as faithful to you like I am.

Tyren: 12:13

And they're getting all these things and accolades and relationships and whatever, etcetera. God, do you see me? Yes. He sees you. He's trying to see how long will you endure, you know.

Tyren: 12:24

And there's many times in our bible where god tested the great figures that we know of today in the bible. Right? Just like he tested, Abraham. And when Abraham was like, god, you give me all these blessings. You're doing all this good stuff for me, but what's the worth of this if I can't build a, you know, a family?

Tyren: 12:44

I don't I can't have my own son.

Micaela: 12:47

Mhmm.

Tyren: 12:47

And God was like, just wait. I know. I will give you your son. And he was like, at this age, like, I'm getting it old. I'm like, oh, like bones.

Tyren: 12:55

Like and and, God was testing them, and he stayed patient and patient. And, yeah, he brought him a son. So, I think it's remaining faithful. And one cool thing too about that I was thinking about this on my way to work this morning with that story, Abraham. Abraham was so faithful to God that when God delivered and brought him his son, Isaac, right,

Micaela: 13:21

he was so faithful that when God said, hey. I want you to sacrifice. Yeah. Isaac, your only son, the

Tyren: 13:26

son he'd been waiting for for years, I want you to sacrifice him. Abraham wasn't like, God, why? Why do I this this this is

Micaela: 13:33

the son I've been waiting for for

Tyren: 13:34

so long and you're gonna have me to kill him? He was obedient and walked in, you know, yeah, obedience and and yeah. He didn't get, like he was confused or, like, wondering, god, what are you trying to do? He faithfully obeyed god and, of course, he didn't kill Isaac, but, you know, it's just that just shows how we needed to remain faithful and to stay patient and just keep doing the good work too because it's another verse to my grandmother. She likes to tell me and she's like, don't get weary in good doing for in due season.

Tyren: 14:12

You know?

Micaela: 14:13

You'll reap the benefits.

Tyren: 14:14

Yes. So that verse in itself right there, it's just hope for all of us to just be patient and wait.

Micaela: 14:20

I agree. And it's funny, Abraham's story. It's a major prayer for me too recently is that I don't wanna be like Abraham and Sarah where they believed God would provide, but then they tried to put their human mind into how. And so then she's like, okay. Sleep with my maidservant because that's the only way you can have like, because I can't do it.

Tyren: 14:41

Yes.

Micaela: 14:42

And so She

Tyren: 14:42

was trying to get mandrakes. You know? Yeah.

Micaela: 14:44

And And so Yeah. And that caused so much more hurt is because instead of waiting and following the plan that God has

Tyren: 14:53

Trusting God's plan.

Micaela: 14:54

Trusting God's plan. Trying to

Tyren: 14:55

do it out of their own effort.

Micaela: 14:56

Exactly. I found that recently, I've been, like, looking back. Hindsight's 2020, but it's just like, yeah. I'm trying to orchestrate this thing myself.

Tyren: 15:03

Think that's why do you think God is adding more time when we try to do things at our at our our own effort when he told us to wait.

Micaela: 15:10

Possibly. I

Tyren: 15:11

think he's like, okay. You're trying to do this? Okay. Another another year, another 3 year. I'm messing around.

Micaela: 15:16

Necessarily think it's yeah. Yeah. Just joking around. I don't think that he would allow something to happen if it was from us. And the only reason I say that, at least for me in my circumstances, because what he wants is surrender.

Micaela: 15:28

And that's, like, the hardest part where you're just, like, oh, shoot.

Tyren: 15:31

Talk about it.

Micaela: 15:32

Yeah. Like, just let go? Like, just, like, back up? Like, what? But I think the reason for that is because that's the only way that God can ultimately get the glory.

Micaela: 15:43

Yeah. Because if it's something that I could orchestrate or do myself, then I'd be like, oh, yeah. Like, I'm so smart. I, like, did this thing, and then it it ended to this thing.

Tyren: 15:51

Yeah.

Micaela: 15:51

And I think it's, like you said, one testing. Because it also says that the end result of the testing of our faith is that we build endurance. Yeah. Like, that's the whole point. It's not just to be like, oh, are you gonna be good or bad?

Micaela: 16:03

It's like the endurance, which it says it builds, like, faith in the

Tyren: 16:06

end. Yes.

Micaela: 16:07

And so, like, in James, when it talks about that, it's not it's he literally says we should consider it joy. Like, it's, like, wow, is that my perspective? It's, like, while I'm waiting. Yes. And it's starting to change, which is awesome.

Tyren: 16:19

Yeah.

Micaela: 16:19

But it's a wake up call for sure, and I don't want to be like Abraham and try to finesse it around and be like, okay, God. You said you're gonna do it, but, like, clearly, it's not gonna happen where I'm at right now. So let me figure out with my human brain how to make it.

Tyren: 16:32

And we should always remember that God knows what he's doing, and God's time is always right.

Micaela: 16:38

Mhmm.

Tyren: 16:38

Even to us, if it looks like he's behind and, like, god, wait. Come on now. Hurry up. Mhmm. He sees the beginning of your life and the end.

Tyren: 16:46

He knows how everything is gonna go. So he knows when he's going to allow certain things to come in your life where you know? So we just gotta even through that hard stormy seasons in our life, we just gotta trust God. It's hard. It's easy to say tiring.

Tyren: 16:59

Yes. It's easy. But if we can just buckle in and just trust God that he's will he will deliver in time, then he will then, you know, it's just gonna be we're gonna be glad that we did that. We just trusted in him.

Micaela: 17:12

Yeah. I like that a lot. Is there a tangible way that you found, like, trusting God? Because I feel like that's such a vast, I don't wanna say commandment. It's, like, such a vast thing, though.

Micaela: 17:23

Like, trusting in God. Like, is there something that you found that has helped you with your trust in God or, like, seasons of waiting?

Tyren: 17:30

I guess I guess because it's going back to the bible, you know, just reading the stories and especially me going through the old testament now and, you know, trying to go all the way through and read all these stories of great people, which is waiting and God allowing them to wait and then good things coming from that.

Micaela: 17:48

Mhmm.

Tyren: 17:48

It's just like, you know, just like yeah. Yeah. Bible study. Just knowing that if God provided before, he's the same God that provided before, that he can do the same thing. You know?

Tyren: 17:59

And then to be honest also, I think that there's areas in my life that I need to fully surrender to God, which I'm doing a really good job on doing, but I need to continue to fully surrender parts of my life that we know what it is. You know, we might not tell people we know we know exactly what it is, and God knows that we know what it is. And, yeah, certain areas that needs to be fully surrendered. But now as I say that, I don't think God is trying to wait for you to become perfect because I know we can't be perfect. Right?

Tyren: 18:34

Right. You know? I think it's just, like, just, you know, doing your best to get as close as you can and just honor God and just build as best a relationship you can in Christ. Because, yeah, when you wonder, like, what's next for you and you're like, what's next around the corner? When would I receive this in my life?

Tyren: 18:57

That builds stress and anxiety. Right?

Micaela: 18:59

That is literally the biggest problem that I've come to recently where it's like, this is it. This is it. Like, this it's happening. It's going. Like, I'm I'm so excited.

Micaela: 19:06

Like and every single time, it's like huge letdown. And then I get mad at God even though God didn't tell me this is it. You know what I mean? It's like and it's this perpetual cycle. So I love that you said that because I think that that's actually something we do ourselves.

Micaela: 19:19

Yeah. And then at least okay. I'll speak for myself. I've done it myself, and then I got mad at God because he didn't follow the expectation that I had over my life. And it was just like, he never told me that that was gonna happen.

Micaela: 19:30

But, like, I get in my head where I'm like, oh, this is the sign. Like, God's you know, he's moving. You know? And that's just, like, that's not it at all. So I think that's huge Yeah.

Micaela: 19:38

In realizing what is from God and what are we putting on top of that.

Tyren: 19:42

Right.

Micaela: 19:43

Yeah. So I think, expectations oh, I've said this multiple times, but I'll say it again. Pre sorry. Unshared expectations or premeditated resentments. And we're doing that with God.

Micaela: 19:58

We're like, god, why didn't you do this? And he's like, when did I tell you I was gonna do this? You know what I mean? Like, in the waiting seasons that you mentioned, I did a deep dive on Chad GPT. I was like, show me every waiting season ever in the Bible, how long it took.

Micaela: 20:10

Like Yeah. There wasn't anything under 10 years. I was like, holy moly. Like Yeah. That's crazy.

Micaela: 20:16

But I think there's so much character that's built there. Any season, God stripped things away from me. I've come out on the other season. I've been like, I needed that. And I think this will be the same season.

Micaela: 20:28

It's just

Tyren: 20:29

Jesus waited for 30 years before he started his ministry.

Micaela: 20:32

Ain't that crazy?

Tyren: 20:33

Yeah.

Micaela: 20:33

A 3 year long ministry. 30 years.

Tyren: 20:36

Wow. It's crazy. So, like, in that in itself, we want things so fast. Yes. We see that social we see social media.

Micaela: 20:46

That's it.

Tyren: 20:46

We see friends. We we're the problem is we're trying to compare ourselves. We're trying to compete with our peers and people around the world that we don't even know. Mhmm. That's what's messing us up.

Tyren: 20:55

Mhmm. We gotta stop. We have to look at our own life, look where we at, and ask ourselves, am I even ready for this? What I really want from God, am I ready? Can I act am I actually at the point in my life where I could handle this thing that I want God to bring in my life?

Tyren: 21:08

Because, honestly, we do a reality check on ourselves. Most of the times, we're not ready for it. We're asking for a gift that God has prepared for us, but not ready to deliver. Right? We're still baking.

Tyren: 21:19

We're like a cake in the oven that's not fully baked yet. We want we wanted to go ahead and pull the cake out. It's not ready.

Micaela: 21:24

Yep.

Tyren: 21:25

So I think that's the message in itself too. Just wait. Like, you're probably not even ready yet for whatever you're asking where you could be. But, you know, because I have to ask myself that sometimes. So, like, Tyron, you're not ready yet.

Tyren: 21:36

Get yourself together.

Micaela: 21:37

Yeah. I get that. I get that.

Tyren: 21:38

I it Am I and and another thing too Mhmm. Like,

Micaela: 21:44

know.

Tyren: 21:47

Yeah. It wasn't. I guess it's like, what what are our intentions for what we wrote? Is it because you wanna show to your friends and family, hey. Look at this, which just came in my life.

Micaela: 22:00

Mhmm.

Tyren: 22:00

Is it if because if it's because he's trying to show off that we know God sees that. He knows the heart and our thoughts. You know? Because or is it genuinely that it's not because you have no you you have no motive or something behind it. You're really wanting something in your life.

Tyren: 22:17

But, you know, what's your intentions and your motives behind what you you're asking God to bring your life? Because that plays a factor too. You know? You might That's so good.

Micaela: 22:25

I might oh, god. I want a girlfriend in my life so

Tyren: 22:26

I can show my friends and show my family, look, who came my life.

Micaela: 22:30

Mhmm.

Tyren: 22:30

But, like, is this so this is like a showboat thing? Are you trying to, like you know? So it's like yeah.

Micaela: 22:36

That's good. That's a good point because that really does, like, kinda tear the walls down where it's just like, why do you want

Tyren: 22:42

Why are you wanting to yeah.

Micaela: 22:43

Because saying you want a spouse is not a bad thing at all. And a lot of people will say, like, if you have that desire, then that means that God put it in your heart. You know what I mean? But I think saying why do I have that desire? Like, what is the root of that?

Tyren: 22:55

The root. Oh, exactly.

Micaela: 22:56

What would you say it is for you right now? I'm curious. And I'll answer to this. So you're not, like, on the on the spot. Or I guess I can go first.

Micaela: 23:02

That way you're not You go first. I'll go first. Yeah. Oh, gosh. Okay.

Micaela: 23:05

Let me actually think about it. Why do I want

Tyren: 23:08

And we're talking about, like

Micaela: 23:09

A spouse. A spouse. Okay. Family.

Tyren: 23:11

Yeah.

Micaela: 23:14

Dang. Yeah. I've never thought about that. That's good. That's good.

Micaela: 23:19

Okay. So when I was mad at God, some of the reasons I brought up and I I I I

Tyren: 23:23

It's hilarious when you say you're mad at God. I'm sorry. Because it's funny when you say that. Like, when I was mad at God.

Micaela: 23:28

Dude, I was yesterday. I was, like, fuming. But one of the reasons I brought up to God and I know this is not a good reason, but I would love to be transparent and share with people kinda where I was. But one of the reasons was, like, protection, and I know that's terrible because God is our protection. Right?

Micaela: 23:45

Mhmm. But I was telling God I was like, sometimes you allow things to happen. If I had a husband, he probably would he would do everything he could to not let this you know what I mean? Like, he would do he would protect me. He'd like and, you know, God sometimes allows things to happen for bigger reasons, but, that was one of the reasons.

Micaela: 24:02

And that's not the reason why I want a husband, but that was one of the superficial, incorrect reasons when I was mad at God yesterday.

Tyren: 24:08

Exactly.

Micaela: 24:11

The reason for marriage is sanctification, though. So any reason that we have that's aside from sanctification, if it's companionship, I mean, those things are good. Yeah. But, ultimately, I think that it would fall out of the context of what God created marriage to be, which is an example of the church. Yes.

Micaela: 24:26

So it's kind of a rude awakening when when going deeper into it. But all the cliche things, I would say I want, like, family and and somebody to pour into and Mhmm. Support and do life with and be a cheerleader for and and, you know, work towards something and have something to pass on to kids later.

Tyren: 24:44

Yeah.

Micaela: 24:45

But the ultimate goal is sanctification when, like, ripping everything away.

Tyren: 24:48

When you say sanctification, you can go into deeper Mhmm.

Micaela: 24:52

About that. Becoming Christ like. So, the word saint comes from sanctification. They have the same root. Yeah.

Micaela: 25:03

And it's basically sanctification is becoming more like Christ, so in whatever way that is through character most of the time. Yeah. But, like, fruit of the spirit, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self control.

Tyren: 25:18

Okay.

Micaela: 25:19

So if old at least that's the, when I heard a really good sermon on marriage, that's that's kind of, like, what the end goal was is that it's to bring us closer to being like Christ.

Tyren: 25:32

Yeah.

Micaela: 25:32

It's a servitude example. You

Tyren: 25:35

know? Exactly. Exactly.

Micaela: 25:37

But, yeah, after I said that, what's your reason?

Tyren: 25:42

You know, I'm just I'm looking for, like, someone that I could just like like you said, like, pour myself into and just for her to pour herself into me. And, we build something strong and unbreakable that no forces or anything outside of God can break or tear apart.

Micaela: 26:08

Mhmm.

Tyren: 26:09

You know? Just like a a partnership, a a a teamwork effort, my best friend. Someone that I could, at the end of a long day, you know, communicate with her, and she understands and encourages me and, you know, things like that. And just, also, like, for a bigger picture of things, that's, like, kind of the smaller picture. But for a bigger picture of things, just, I guess, building a a legacy.

Tyren: 26:37

Mhmm. You know? Wanna carry my name, you know, and just, build a family and show what a family under God looks like.

Micaela: 26:48

Mhmm. You

Tyren: 26:48

know, instill into my kids and sons and daughters and just things like that. And just lead the way and, you know, just just teach them how to love others and how to be like Christ and just be that example. Because my dad and my mom, you know, just was that example for me and my siblings. And, I always said I'm blessed to have the parents that God had blessed me with. So I wanna I don't want to disappoint my parents, and I wanna disappoint God.

Tyren: 27:17

I wanna carry that to the next generation. So Yeah. It just I know having a lady in my life can create can be birth to those things I won't. So I think if you would ask me this question some years ago, it would have been more of a, immature type of mindset because I would have not probably thought of the things or brought up the things that I brought up to you right now. Mhmm.

Tyren: 27:42

But

Micaela: 27:42

Same though. Yeah. It would have been like, who's the most impressive, successful, hot person?

Tyren: 27:47

Hot person. Yeah. Ego. Yes. My ego.

Tyren: 27:49

Feeding my ego and everything. And Yeah. I want a baddie and stuff like you know, things like that. But I'm I'm more mature now, and it's not about those things. It's about someone who really loves the Lord, you know, and, loves the Lord.

Tyren: 28:05

Put the Lord over you, you know, put God first.

Micaela: 28:07

Mhmm.

Tyren: 28:08

And just want to see the best in you and just wanna grow together and build together and mesh together. And, yeah. I I just yeah. Yeah.

Micaela: 28:20

Those people exist too. You know what I mean? Like, I think for a long time, I had the idea where it was like, I'm maybe the only person that wants these things, and I was like, the fact that I want these things is proof that somebody else probably does too.

Tyren: 28:32

Of course.

Micaela: 28:32

I think a lot of times we can get, like, very narrow sided where it's just, like, negative even where you're like, oh, I'll never you know? Yeah. But I think that's the voice of the enemy, honestly. And I think that that's one of the things because marriage brings so much glory to God

Tyren: 28:48

Yeah.

Micaela: 28:48

When done in a godly way that it points every arrow back to God.

Tyren: 28:53

Yes. And I

Micaela: 28:54

think that that's why it can often be something that's attacked by the enemy. And I think every at least for me, most attacks from the enemy has always started with my mind.

Tyren: 29:03

It started with what? I'm sorry.

Micaela: 29:04

With my mind.

Tyren: 29:04

Oh, yeah. I think that's where the I think that's where the enemy always attacks, in your mind. Yeah. Yeah.

Micaela: 29:09

For sure. So I think that that's that's super good. I'm glad How

Tyren: 29:11

you and your intentions are your intentions yeah. Like, how you meet your significant other

Micaela: 29:19

Mhmm.

Tyren: 29:20

And I wanna say to say that plays a big part into, like, how far y'all going to go and how how well built that relationship would be under Christ, how how how well the foundation would be.

Micaela: 29:37

You know? Because if you're if you like,

Tyren: 29:40

for example, for guys and girls listening, like, what he's talking about. Like, if you if your intentions is lust, it's sexual desires

Micaela: 29:51

Mhmm.

Tyren: 29:51

And you go places where you probably can get that easily or find people that have the same mindset as it's it's not gonna last. It's not even as bad as you want it to last and you want a lot to yourself and a lot to everyone else, it's not gonna last. Yeah.

Micaela: 30:04

And the person you pick for a one night stand versus the person you pick to be your forever partner

Tyren: 30:10

Exactly.

Micaela: 30:11

Completely different. Mhmm. Like, anybody. Like, it'd be like, oh, yeah. Like we said, it's the egotistical, like, I want the hottest, most successful Yeah.

Micaela: 30:19

Interesting person. Mhmm. Those aren't bad in and of itself.

Tyren: 30:22

It's not. It's not.

Micaela: 30:23

But it's whenever you prioritize those

Tyren: 30:24

Priorities. Yes.

Micaela: 30:25

Over the things that are gonna actually, like, bring you joy.

Tyren: 30:29

And I wanna say this too. Yeah. I think it's gonna lead into I'm sorry. Tell me if I'm talking too much, by the way.

Micaela: 30:34

No. You're good. I promise. Yeah.

Tyren: 30:36

I wanna say that, beauty is not a bad thing at all.

Micaela: 30:40

Oh, no. Oh. In the

Tyren: 30:41

house, some people think that, oh, looking for a beautiful person, they might think that, oh, I'm I'm lusting. No. You're not. Like, even in recording it in the scriptures when Jacob wanted Rachel over her sister Leah, he he way he worked the extra 7 years Yeah. To have, I forgot his his name.

Tyren: 31:02

So that was his daughter, Rachel's father. He worked with him 7 plus years just to get Rachel because he was like, Rachel, you know, looks amazing. I want her over. So I don't think it's I don't think it's bad at all. Mhmm.

Tyren: 31:18

It's just like like, again, like, what's your you can look you can want a beautiful person as your partner, but it's more than looks. It's more than that. If it's just looks, that's where it's lead to lust, and it's not gonna nothing's gonna come out out of that.

Micaela: 31:33

100%. And it's remembering, Proverbs 31, it says, charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord should be praised.

Tyren: 31:40

Exactly.

Micaela: 31:40

And so it's a reminder that those things that you're placing the highest value in, you're likely to be disappointed if that's the only value that you see in that person.

Tyren: 31:47

Yes.

Micaela: 31:48

That's it. We need to be attracted to our partners. That's part of I

Tyren: 31:51

think that's a I think that's a big key. And one of the one of the big keys yeah. Well, you keep going.

Micaela: 31:56

No. That's it.

Tyren: 31:57

Oh, okay. That's it. Yeah. Because if you're if you're not physically attracted to your partner, the love life will not be as best that it could be,

Micaela: 32:07

I think, too. Yeah. For sure. And I don't think God's gonna call people to compromise in such a way where it's like, okay, God. I guess.

Micaela: 32:13

I saw that as somebody's worst fear on Instagram, though. They were like, women, like, what are your worst fears, like, in your recent faithfulness with God? Mhmm. And one of the top comments was, I'm afraid God's gonna make me marry somebody that I find unattractive. And I was like, dang.

Micaela: 32:26

Like, that sucks. Yeah. But I think it is a fear that we can have sometimes because the porch is a little bit different. There's just attractive people at the porch everywhere. But, like, previously, whenever I went to church I'm sorry.

Tyren: 32:38

I love this a lot. I'm like, I see I see it turn red.

Micaela: 32:40

It's okay.

Tyren: 32:41

I guess because I'm just so aware because I, you know, I

Micaela: 32:43

just know

Tyren: 32:44

so much about but you keep going.

Micaela: 32:45

Yeah. Yeah. But sometimes the people at church, like, when you're looking around, you're like, oh, dang. This is the pool. You know what I mean?

Micaela: 32:52

Like, this is it. But it's not. And it depends on the area that

Tyren: 32:56

you're at.

Micaela: 32:56

Just say

Tyren: 32:57

this is the pool?

Micaela: 32:57

Like This is the yeah. Like, well, because anytime I'm dating, I'm like, I'm looking at church.

Tyren: 33:01

Okay.

Micaela: 33:02

Like, I'm not on dating apps or anything anymore. So, but yeah. So you kinda look around, you're like, oh, dang.

Tyren: 33:09

But Mikaela, you know, that doesn't mean that they're I mean, yes. I like I'm glad that your your selection of the pool that you're you're looking for is is this church scene. Like, what better scene is it than a church. Right?

Micaela: 33:24

Mhmm.

Tyren: 33:24

But I want you I also wanna let you know that they could be outside the church as well.

Micaela: 33:30

For sure. I think the odds of throwing a stone and hitting a true believer is harder than you think, though. Like, if I just went to Walmart right now

Tyren: 33:38

Walmart, you will pick Walmart out of all the place.

Micaela: 33:40

Okay. I'm sorry. What? Tom Thumb? Like

Tyren: 33:43

Whole Foods.

Micaela: 33:44

Okay. Whole Foods. If I go to Whole Foods and I cast a stone, the likelihood of it hitting somebody maybe this is me putting limitations on God. How about about that? I'll I'll take that one in.

Micaela: 33:56

Next time I go to Whole Foods, I'll keep my eyes open.

Tyren: 33:57

Or Starbucks or, you know, anywhere. You know? I I will say this. Most I really like to say this, but ladies that I have ran into that I have, you know, talked with or found attractive or whatever the case may be, have happened in the most unexpected circumstances and places that I understand expect to meet people at.

Micaela: 34:26

Okay. Fair enough.

Tyren: 34:28

I ran into this one, young lady at Walmart.

Micaela: 34:34

You said no to Walmart earlier. Now that's where the story starts.

Tyren: 34:37

Yeah. You're right. That is just yeah. I don't know. But, I did and I, yeah.

Tyren: 34:44

Long story short, yeah, I talked to her and stuff like that. But, she is a believer in things like that and, amazing looking girls like that. I just didn't expect that I was going to get grab something real quick and leave and I was like, who's, like, no. Let me say something. It's just you you don't know.

Tyren: 34:58

That story happened like, things like that happened many times in my life and it's just, the church is a good idea. I don't know, of course. Mhmm. But, I just wanna let you know that, you know, it could be you never know. It could be anywhere.

Micaela: 35:10

Keep an open mind.

Tyren: 35:11

I love Except the except the bar in the club. But

Micaela: 35:13

Well yeah. No. That's not gonna probably end up well. I love that you mentioned that you approached somebody out and I call it in the wild. Like, outside of an app is in the wild.

Micaela: 35:22

Yeah. But, what did she do that, like, showed you or, I guess, opened the door for you to come and pursue? Was it like, did she look at you? Did she smile? Or did you just see her and you're like, let me go?

Tyren: 35:33

Yeah. So

Micaela: 35:35

What are some qualities that a man of god's looking for

Tyren: 35:39

Now this might

Micaela: 35:40

Start ruffling some feathers?

Tyren: 35:42

This is about to ruffle a lot of, feathers.