Legion Podcasts - All Shows | Cinema_PSYOPS

Darlene's into going fast and Hoover's into Darlene, but when they both get into a red-hot race car, the reckless fun accelerates into a trunkful of hot pursuits. Written and directed by Charles B. Griffith and produced by Roger Corman. It stars Ron Howard as Hoover Niebold, a rebellious young man who steals a fast race car to impress a girl, triggering a wild county-wide chase led by his own father, the local sheriff

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Creators and Guests

Host

Cort PSYOPS

Podcaster, Horror SuperFreak, Obsessive Movie collector, amateur bass slapper, guitarist, full-stack developer, and low key mad scientist.

What is Legion Podcasts - All Shows?

With a variety of shows, Legion Podcasts brings you discussion on the worlds of horror, film and video games from an assortment of perspectives.

[Music]

Two stick legs!

[Silence]

So it's blue!

I got everyone deserves you live

TRUTE!

Show PK short, but still feels long.

Just two middle ways for us, babbling on!

Just two middle-as more.

[Music]

This podcast sucks. Zip a sliout sucks. This show still fucking sucks. Just too many late for us, try to do a show. Virtue single-in, how they're so bold. Simple style suck. This podcast suck.

[Silence]

Oh handle.

And welcome to the five hundred forty four.

forty fourth episode.

Fourth episode of Cinema PsyOps. I'm your old cort, the guy that cannot believe that Ron Howard ever didn't look old and was proven wrong by the film we're covering this week. Eat my dust. And doing the notes for all of you for that 1976 film is Michael.

is my co host Matt.

I mean he looked pretty young when he was OP.

Yeah, but unlike that, uh once he started getting past like he started looking old even on like happy days, you know. Oh happy days.

Well happy days when he came back with the mustache and shit. I was just like, All right, uh you you look older than the guy who's playing your dad at this point. What the fuck?

What the fu-

What are you fucking doing?

Yeah, when you look older than the voice of David the Gnome, you know you've done something to age yourself prematurely.

You wanna have a mustache, that's fine. But at least y the way I rock it is you also have to have a five o'clock shadow with it. Just a mustache, a standalone mustache, you sir, are either a pedophile or a porn star. It's one of the two.

Well I was about to drop Tom Selleck on you, but then I realized that Tom Selleck is the one who pervades that

uh particular five o'clock shadow or that nice light stubble with the well groomed mustache, which makes my argument null and void. But I will

But I will also say this.

'Cause he he only had a mustache and like friends when he was did his roles in Friends. And I will say this.

He's the only man who can get away with it. He's the only man who doesn't he all he just makes a mustache looks good, even on a standalone.

Yeah.

You so you are right as well, because I did forget about Tom Stelleck and I'll have to deal with that. Yeah, but he

Yeah, but he always has that permanent five o'clock shadow feel because he's one of the gentlemen that his facial hair is so dark, there is always that sort of dark facial hair stubble.

Dude, tell me a better looking man than him and Quindy. I'm I'm just telling you right now.

Ha ha ha.

That's I'm I'm a straight man, but I I'd think about it.

Oh, that's fucking

That's fucking awesome. Oh Jesus Christ. But anyway, back to uh people that have always looked old. Uh Clint Howard even as a kid in his appearances in Mayberry, he looked old even then. Yeah.

Like a tiny octogenarian.

You are the oldest looking toddler I've ever fucking seen.

Right.

Absolutely. So yeah, there is that. Uh I'm bring up Clint Howard because he is in Eat My Dust as well. I was always under the impression that Clint Howard agreed to do this movie because he got to co-direct it or direct some of the things, and that's not the case. Uh no he did this specifically just to break out of

That whole Opie and Happy Days and being a good kid sort of

So this is this is the first time I ever see Ron Howard trying to get tail. All right?

Yeah.

Yeah, I looked at that and I was like looking at the young lady that's supposed to be hot for him and I'm like, good luck with that hot Ron Howard Howard tail.

She didn't like it any more than you do.

No, apparently not.

She really I mean I mean, good God almighty.

This movie, man, uh everyone gets played a little bit, I'm telling you

Ha ha ha.

Instead of talking around it, why don't we go ahead and take the break here? We'll uh play the Legion Patreon ad. And because Bo's back, I don't feel like I need to change that. Although I do feel like I need to qualify that every single week because I am who I am.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You are who you are.

Yeah, I am the person who also has to qualify that the music that you were about to hear after the Legion Patreon ad will be completed.

Just extremely like within seconds of the editing getting started.

Started. It's gonna be fantastic. Don't everybody worry about it. It's probably gonna be the best stuff you've ever heard.

I will not promise that at all because I'm not sure.

I guarantee it. I I guarantee that Cort will make the best stuff you ever hear. Wow. And cort also guarantees it. No, he guarantees it. Absolutely does.

Absolutely do not.

We here at Cinema Say, I'm guaranteed at court.

We'll have the best music you've ever heard.

Wow.

There is no way that I could live up to that. That is not a real guarantee. This is Matt being hyperbolic and my lawyers' heads are about to explode. So we're gonna take the break here. We're gonna play the Legion Patreon ad and we will play some kind of music that will exist quite literally.

Literally seconds before the edit of this episode begins. And when we come back, we will also commentate on that and then move into doing the review. This'll keep it quiet.

Oh, hi there. I didn't see it.

You call me cutting a new show.

Show.

I'm Bo Ransdell and I'm one of the mini creators you can find on Legion Podcasts.

My fellow podcasters and I work hard to bring you the best in horror podcasting.

But that comes at a cost.

Cost.

Not that, but also, yes. No, what I'm getting at Is that there are server costs, costs for good microphones and software for editing, all the things that make our shows, you know, fun to listen to.

And you can help.

If you're enjoying the shows on LegionPodcasts.com

or in the Legion Network available on iTunes and Stitcher, just about anywhere you can download a podcast really.

You can help us out and get a little something for your trouble at patreon.com Fort slash Legion Podcasts
For just$2 a month, you get a pair of movie commentaries exclusive to Patreon, and for$5, you can also join us for a monthly screening of a movie.

All of that available on Patreon.com/LegionPodcasts

We appreciate it and thank you for listening.

No Back to the cutting room.

[Music]

Shift inside.

Five.

Share a parry somebody sick and s- Races on the line, gotta

[Silence]

For Darling's heart, he's gotta stand his ground. Roaring down the track, feel the wild freeze.

Free.

May evil's got the bow, just wait and see.

On a mission, can you feel the thrill?

Real.

Dolly by side, let's chase the While Jones goes distracted, he makes his move.

Smooth!

Stealing Mabel, he's got the

Got the groove.

Friends hoppin', racing sparks in the air Deputy's on the tail, but they haven't a care. Crashing through a diner, splinters and flies. Sheriff's in a fury can't believe his eyes.

Roarin' down the track The wild free Magos got the power, just way at sea.

On a mission, can you feel the thrill?

Real.

Dolly by side this ch the brill

Well that song was definitely created with within mere seconds before the edit of this episode began.

[Silence]

You haven't even heard songs.

I I guarantee it's the best I've ever heard. So do you. We guarantee it's

Absolutely do.

Absolutely do not guarantee it.

We completely

Completely and utterly guarantee that you probably had an orgasm listening to that song. That's how good it was.

All I can absolutely guarantee at this moment is that I'm gonna try and stop Matt from doing that bit and I emphasise on the word try.

Yeah.

Alright.

Eat by dust, the first thirty minutes. Well, we're in a big race and we see young Ron Howard and his homies pull up and

They're supposed to be filling up uh paper towels, but really they're just trying to get into the race for free. Well anyway, we get a nice little crowd scene and right as we're watching the crowd there there's a whole lot of ass just on your television screen, ladies and gentlemen, or whatever you're watching this particular movie.

But there's just a whole lot of ass in yellow spandex shorts. So it's all the same.

It's all the same lady. It is an absolutely wonderful to look at ass. There's nothing wrong with it at all. It's just that the frame is quite literally taken up by nothing but this beautiful ass. And I thank you for that movie. It's a bold train.

Thank you movie with a whole lot of butt. By the way, actress's name, Christopher Norse.

Yeah. Thank you.

Thanks for that.

Thanks for that. I did Christopher though. It's a weird weird first name for a lady. But fucking seventies. What do I know? All right. So uh And she's with her parents who are very snooty, snobby people.

So Ron and Crew, they're running around filling paper towels and watching the race and they're just I mean, they're fucking wild. They can't even sit still for half a second.

Well run runs into the sheriff, who also just happens to be his dad, and that is our first clip. This is how you pod.

You podcast.

Yeah.

Fucking egg.

Hi there, Dad. Don't you give me that? What? You change the towels at the Exxon over on Magnolia. Yeah, yeah, sure. What time?

Pay attention to me.

807. Look at me when you're talking to me. Now what time were you at the Exxon? I told you, Dad. 907. 907, huh? Well, what time do you change the towels at the sheriff's office?

Between 916 and 922. Oh yeah. Well, how did you get from the Exxon to the sheriff's office in nine minutes without getting a speeding ticket, huh?

What's so funny? African trying after the biggest. Oh, it just makes me suck up.

to see grown men laugh at something like that. You know when you laugh it just encourages them to do more of the same. How the hell do you expect to control your kids? I don't know, Harry.

How do you do it? Harry, it's your kid. Don't feel afraid. That's it! One more word.

No, no, no.

You're under arrest.

All right.

Well, Ass Lady, she decides to go get some snacks and uh she runs into Ron and uh oh that's gonna be our next clip.

This is in fact how you should podcast.

This is podcast.

He said he called me Hoover because I put him into a depression. It's the only funny thing I I ever heard him say. Who? My father, you know the law. Did he go to the ladies, John too? Oh yeah, sure. Only when nobody's looking.

Thank you.

Hey, listen, uh, are are you still going with that uh Harold Bait? Is that to you?

Well, I I was just wondering, that's all. Well, I just um I thought about those tall rolls. Can I just chuck them? Yeah, sure. Go ahead. We're done. Excuse me. Excuse me. I'm excuse me. I'm I'm sorry. Hey Miranda?

Well, um, did you see your dog? Did you see Dolene? And uh...

Oh, a cotton candy. And two lemon lime drinks. Dolly. And wait a minute. No, make that Coke, okay? And I like a cotton candy.

That's it, whore!

Hoover, maybe we ought to wait till the line thins out a little.

Me? Well yeah, I thought uh you know why not? The girl's gotta watch out who she's seen associating with.

What do you mean? You are food or knee bowls, right? Wait a minute.

And just because I got a stupid name, it doesn't mean I'm not worth going with.

You're gonna try me.

Thank you.

[Silence]

My self-respect. Yeah, well maybe. Yeah, but but now listen to this. You never know, right? I might turn out to be a very interesting character. But I go out with uh a guy whose father's a cop

Good point. We can always have him bumped off. Hey, you did that for me? Sure, hell yes.

Well, you know, I I I mean you know I I I didn't mean uh look it if you're such a novelty, uh what makes you so different?

Well uh I got more speeding tickets than anybody else in the county.

And and I can uh

Chicken for ride. What?

Oh, forget it. Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute. You said you wanted to go for a ride.

Only if you're as fast as you say you are. I am. I listen, I got my truck right outside. It's right out front.

Oh really? Yeah.

I offer you the best chance you've had in your life when you offer me a ride in a truck. Yeah, all right. Okay, uh...

Just give me a minute to think, all right? Think? I don't want to ride in just any car. I want to ride in that car. Which one?

[Music]

Double the goddamn right she's perfect. Cost me my lolliple late lamented life savings. Yeah, I know. Do do do.

Throw in another can? Yeah, that's fine. All we have to do is get her on off truck a few times. Why don't you pack up the spares? Okay.

Honey, ain't you boy?

Yeah. You're goddamn right she is.

You still using that that engine from Darlington?

Hell no. Best damn engine this side of some Hubble Bubble submarine, but only if you use it for just one race.

Yeah, I dropped that one smack in the middle of the Mississippi.

Nah, anyhow there's a new one's better. Hotter and a Houston whorehouse.

Yeah. Thanks.

You know, I don't know anybody else who puts everything his wins back into his car. Keeps me winning.

Give me a hand here, we boy. Sure?

[Silence]

Hey, you didn't change the rear end, did you?

I mean, it's still 613, right? Hey boy, how long you been spying on me?

Oh no, no, I I never

See, I just read a lot of stock car and hot rod magazines and stuff. I read them all.

Hey boys, those magazines are all full of bull double the goddamn loaning.

That's what my father's there.

You a driver?

No, he's uh Sure.

[Silence]

You gotta

Following your daddy's foot pops, are you? Dick that.

I'm gonna be a race driver.

Uh-oh. That's what they all say.

Boy, that is what they all say.

You let Big Bubba give you a bit of advice.

Best way to see a race.

from right up there in them blankety blank bleachers.

Hey, Bobby, truck's broken!

broken

What's the hammer? Truck's broke!

[Silence]

Thank you.

Do you buy Ron Howard at all as this kind of like cool hip dude that everybody wants to hang around?

H here's the problem, he's not a cool hip dude if you watch this movie. He's a fucking dork and a half who just likes racing. He just happens to have a small group of friends.

And then he's the hots for this lady.

who you're gonna see doesn't really like I think she just kinda goes with the flow. But Ron is not Mr. Cool. In fact he has a hard time giddy ladies because of his

dad naming him a dumb name and his dad being the sheriff and him only really being interested in race cars. So all Ron Howard's character is, it's pretty much I wanna race and fuck and that's it.

Yeah.

Yeah, like I said, he's a hip cat, cool.

Cool.

Yeah.

Yeah, all right. We think he's hip and cool, but no one else fucking does.

Rock and Dance in this movie.

I think this film is trying to sell him as hip and cool, even though it's not really displaying that like that he's all that popular.

You can't be hipping cool wearing a fucking Civil War hat.

hat.

From either side, but especially Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, I don't even think it has a patch on it. Yeah, exactly.

Movie though though, right? Yeah.

Yeah. In the movie poster th there looks like to be a patch, but no, this is just a plain

hat with no symbol on it, but it appears to be more blue. It's not gray.

Yeah. So it's either black or blue. So at least it's not gray.

I noticed that the kid's belt buckle, however, did have the rebel flag on it. So he's either a Civil War nut or a white supremacist wannabe piece of shit. So let's move on.

Yeah, anyway. So Uh anyway, uh, you know, Ron was talking to the race car driver and then he takes the car, he gets the girl and all his friends and they take off.

A cop chases him.

Takes out a whole front of an Asian restaurant, which is really surprising. This is a very small town that has an Asian restaurant. That is very, very progressive. Good for them. Well, if it's

Well if it's out west it's not that shocking. There's a lot more prevalence in Asian culture out there from the railroads and things for a long time.

That's true.

Yeah.

Uh so anyway, he uh It but and then the cop crashes, of course, and he wrecks.

Uh and as they're driving she uh the the ass girl, she's keeps putting her foot on top of his foot of the gas, going'cause she has to go faster. And she keeps saying, Let's go faster, let's go faster and it's like goddamn

I think she's just into the vibrations of the car whenever they have to speed up.

Yeah yeah

Or or she's just an let me be delicate fucking nuts.

Uh I believe that.

So unfortunately, she's my type.

Yeah, I was gonna say I believe that your uh particular prognosis for her mental diagnosis may actually be correct.

Because uh you can smell crazy when it comes to ladies because that's what you like.

you like. Yeah, I know it. I know what a woman is crazy. Trust me, I've been married to it for over two decades now.

And some of that is happily.

It i i i all of it's in it, happily, but now I'm afraid she's hearing me, so just let's just settle down.'Cause I am in the bunker, but she is right upstairs.

Yeah.

This is starting to get to be that key and peel routine where I

I said dude

Yeah, I said bitch. You said that though. You called her a bitch?

It was implied.

[Silence]

So we see some more cops headed out for the station as the sheriff gets back with a gaggle of people rabble robbling and that is our next clip. This isn't

This is in fact how you should podcast.

Yes, less work.

[Silence]

Now this is a doorbell.

And those of you who are personally involved one at a time May ring this doorbell and I will open this door and I will let you in.

One at a time! All right, I'll turn one at a time! Why the gun?

Sounds like a lynching.

I don't know

Maybe him. Phew. How often you change the double the goddamn towels around here? Who the hell are you? Big Bubba Jones.

Well, you won't make some of it.

Oh, it was your car that was...

Take it, right?

Bet your turned up nose it was Piddlypunk. You watch your smart mouth, fella.

You can file a complaint.

Oh. Now he will need a complaint form, and that will be CF-70-80-BF-Dou O-O. You got that?

Shit, I don't want no forums. I just want to get Mabel back.

Baby book.

Well, what's missing persons? That's a whole other form. That's MF-70-

[Silence]

Is that Junior Hales farm we're coming to? Yeah. Let's pick him up and give him a ride. He's got a busted leg. I need the.

Good for him!

No, no, stick that. Aw, come on.

Come on, Hoover.

Hoover, we used to go together. Please, come on.

Come on!

[Silence]

Hold it right there!

You dum dumb? Somebody please shut the goddamn door. Oh, I need a drink. Got beer in the icebox. Oh good, honey, would you get me one? You want it in the keys?

[Silence]

Do not tell a policeman not to buy a gobs. Put it down. Okay, Sheriff. Where are they? Now, I know you're all worried because I am too. My kid is out there too. Now, what they're doing is showing off to each other. Now, this is not a theft. It's just a ooh.

Now look, when those kids took that girl.

I called you outside.

I can't talk to you all at one time.

So if you will just file into the waiting room, I will talk to you one at a time.

Come on, Harry. That's no waiting room. That's a goddamn drunk tank. Or you can go home and wait for my call.

Oh Oh, did you do that?

[Silence]

Puts me in my retirement.

No, puts me in mind a tub. Well, Harry, I was trying to apprehend a 603 on Main Street.

Street.

He ran two red lights, Harry. Some kind of a race car going on.

Car going about a hundred.

about a hundred miles an hour.

Harry, I lost control of the cruiser and took out the whole front wall of Chow Fong's Chinese restaurant. Did you happen to get a look at the number on the side of the car? I didn't see the

I didn't see this side of the car.

Not much of that, Sandy.

All units. This is Harry to all units.

Be on the lookout for an orange judo sedan with

Now this is a competition stock car and it's very, very fast. You are to apprehend without aggressive action and that means no shooting, I repeat. No shooting.

This is just a bunch of kids out screwing around and they are not dangerous. I They are not fake.

Alright.

So the crew pick up Jerry who on his farm was the busted leg. He uh and oh Ron's not happy about it because uh Askirl used to go with Jerry and when Jerry comes out you're like, Okay, Askiril has

No taste in bed because Jerry is a fucking sloth looking motherfucker. You know what I mean? Like

Yeah, i I mean Ron Howard's still kind of an upgrade, but still lady, good luck with that hot Ron Howard tail.

Howard Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, really the hottest guy is Ron Howard's friend with the cowboy hat, but fuck it.

Fuck it, whatever.

Whatever.

He's already got a girlfriend. He's the guy that with the van and he already had a girlfriend.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think he has two of them.

Um, because Lord knows that other girl is not with Clint Howard. Okay, that's just not happening.

Only for like.

Nobody's getting that hot Clint Howard ass or

He's a married man, that's not very fair.

Very fair.

Okay.

Well listen, Sally Field's been married too. We still talk shit. What do you want? Wha I mean, what are we doing here?

That's fair.

What what wait wait hold on? Quint Howard is where you draw the fucking line?

I guess I just have more sympathy'cause I know what it feels like to look like a Glenn Howard.

Hour.

know I but Jesus I'm not I'm a chud too, but fuck it. That's why I get to make fun of people. I uh I get to make fun of ugly people'cause I am also ugly, which means I'm not punching down. I'm just punching straight. Okay?

I think that's where my problem comes in is that I'm not actually ugly, I'm a gorgeous man, so that I feel like I'm punching down if I pick on Clint Howard too much.

Well then you gotta stop. See I'm ugly and fat, so I can make fun of fat and ugly people. Uh it's not punching down, it's punching straight ahead.

I feel like you've just hijacked well.

Fuck off everyone.

You just hijacked woke in the worst way possible and I love it.

I really did. I really did. I just hijacked Woke in the one way you never should, but I did it.

That's right.

Let's move on.

Some day the assholes of the world will build a statue to me and it will be Okay.

So it'll be.

It'll be awkward.

Yeah, it'll be fine. Uh

Hmm.

So anyway, he also brings a shotgun for hunting.

Which, by the way, this would be a great fucking idea for Quail. Anyway, a cop shows up, they lead the chase, destroy pretty much the entire farm, they get away, uh while the farmer yells at the cop, and that is the end of our first thirty minutes.

Yeah, it moves fast. It's what? An hour? It's what? Like a ninety minute movie? It's like an hour and a half.

Yeah, it's about an hour twenty minute twelve hour twenty eight minutes. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. So it's it's about an hour and thirty minutes max, but it moves at a really good grip. We don't really waste a lot of time once he hops.

in the car. And the worst part about this so far is I agree with Ron Howard. There's too many goddamn people in this car and it's making it to where he cannot make this car do what it should be able to do safely.

Especially with this car isn't built for passengers either.

Yeah.

There shouldn't even really be a passenger seat. This is a fucking race car they stole.

You y y you later on they get other race cars to try to chase him and none of them have seats.

And seats in it apparently. Right.

Right. I grew I grew up with family members who actually did run dirt track races. They had their own cars that they built. Nobody puts in passenger seats in those kinds of fucking cars at all.

At all. No.

There's only a driver's seat and that's it. Yeah.

Yeah, this is just for them to uh be as fast and race as possible. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

Yeah. The one that Ron Howard is driving is not accurate to how someone would actually put in a like make a race car. Maybe in like The road race style where people are pulling stuff out for weight and stuff like what we would see with the David Carradine movie of Cannonball.

Maybe.

Maybe they would have like for their mechanic, like they would have someone traveling with you that would help you be able to repair the car and

Keep it running for those kinds of like long-term races. But this kind of thing, the the type of circle track race that this car came from that he stole, they would not be building it like that.

This also is the nicest car of all the race cars. Uh this the guy who is the race car driver, uh Big Bubba.

Who seems like a pretty nice guy.

ご視聴ありがとうございました

Uh he uh he puts all of his winnings into his car. That's why he always wins, apparently. So there you go. Fair enough.

Fair enough. We can move on.

Alright. So anyway, the next thirty starts out, uh the group is driving, there's dialogue. Fuck it, that's a clip, baby.

This is in fact how you should podcast.

I I'm just saying.

How do you store?

You stole from Big Baba Jones, front of 2,000 people. Maybe you're famous.

How'd you know about us anyway? Oh, it's all over the radio. I heard on KDD T not one.

Not more than twenty

more than twenty minutes ago. Look out!

Just miss the fun of a bitch. We need a radio. Yeah, who have you got a radio in this vehicle? No, there's just an intercom so the pets can talk. Oh, well, I have a radio. Where? Where? Oh, just don't you imagine friendly air at home?

Oh yeah, sure. Go back to town. Right. No one's gonna look for us there. Yeah, they won't look there. Yeah, all the cops are out here looking for us. Who votes to go back to town?

I do. I do. Okay, it's unanimous who is. Meanie, but I'm driving. Oh, Billy, meeting drive, can't you?

Sure can.

Okay, all right. Go back and get the suit.

Okay, Junior, I don't want you to read this until you get home. Okay. First.

So anyway, uh they pick up an old man who's just coming home from grocery.

Kidnap an old man.

I love the guy.

Alright, they love the guy.

You can still kidnap someone that you love. I learned that the hard way.

Are your lawyers telling you you shouldn't talk anymore?

No, I was the victim in this case, so it's okay.

Oh, you were the victim. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, I've been kidnapped by someone who claimed that they love me.

Like how old were you?

I can't talk about it still.

But it's still too true.

Okay.

Jesus Christ.

I'm not laughing. I'm crying right now. Let's just move on and do the review.

Yeah.

All right man, you need to get another tattoo. It'll be all right. Exactly. I don't know where this one's gonna go, but you figure it out.

So plenty of room on the front of my torso.

There you go.

Ha ha ha

I'm laughing at your tears. Uh anywho. So we get some more chasing, uh uh with a cop chasing these guys. Uh y you're waiting at the trade tracks and you think a big trade's coming and just a couple like n Yahoos and one of those like little fucking whatever they are.

on the tracks. Uh then uh the oh they're chaser the cop flips and ends up upside down on a drainage ditch and that leads to our next clip.

Next clip

This is in fact how you should podcast.

This is

This is how you have to And my present position precludes presumption of hot pursuit until I am removed by extraneous means from the inverted condition.

The suspects are freeing away.

And if you want to catch them

Uh.

I suggest you call the Strategic Air Command. Use our You don't say.

Harry?

Old Mrs. Lewis out on 53.

fifty three.

She says the kids have kidnapped her husband.

Thank you.

Clark, is this all we've got?

You can always quit. Fellow steeple in the drunk tank to please be patient. I'll see the first one now.

under arrest for assault and officer. And this flatwit and them kids wrecked my whole farm in about 15 seconds and wouldn't do a damn thing about it. Hey, don't blame that on me. Some kid who looked a lot like Uber Harry went through that place like a bomb on wheels.

All I was trying to do was keep up with him.

Than this hay seed. All right, all right. We'll take care of it later.

Yeah.

Oh, uh, if you don't mind Mr. Hale waiting in the VIP lounge, I'll be with you shortly. I expect to

I expect to get my just desserts.

deserves. Right.

Why be different? No kidding, Harry. They wrecked everything. They went through fences, chicken coop, cow barns, everything. I'll put it in your report. I don't want to hear anymore.

Y'all know.

Well, I'm most upset because my daughter's reputation.

Mmm, a pearl beyond price.

Prize. What practice? Reputation. I had one once. Don't worry.

You got one now. Oh, I don't like veiled insinuations.

Sous-titrage ST' 501 And my daughter is maybe getting murdered.

They'll say she brought it on herself.

They always do.

And now hold on a minute. How much damage was done to the car? Well, we're gonna have to pull it apart to get the mud out. Even my guns were jammed. Not your car, BB brain. Mine. Well, what are you asking me for? Oh, it was my car you were chasing.

Yeah? You're under arrest? Will you knock it off?

All right. So we get some more driving and they uh you know, more racing around and they cause an ambulance to crash. They had two twin Fucking paramedics in it and that was kinda weird.

Uh anyway the pull up to uh Uh they pull up to a friend's house to get a radio and that is our next clip.

Jesus Christ, this is awesome.

Awesome.

Do you remember that old song, Chloe?

Yes, Bruno. I think I do.

[Silence]

seem to have company. Who are they? Yes.

Yes, what? Yes, we seem to have company.

Chloe, it looks like a bunch of kids. Must be some of Miranda's little friends.

Shorty.

God, oh God. Oh no, I've got a rough elbow. Oh, don't look. Women over thirty have the ugliest elbows in the world, don't you think? Uh-huh.

Gonna have to stop at a drugstore and get something to make me smooth again.

Hello, putty.

Hello, putty cat. You're home early. Yeah, we came by to pick up my radio. Hello, Georgie. Would you and your little friends like some lemonade and cookies? Sure. You know, this ride's getting to be kind of a bummer.

What do you mean, what's wrong? Are you afraid that, uh, what's gonna happen to you when we get back?

No, this whole thing would be a lot more fun if we could get rid of these jokers in the back, you know? Uh, what for? You still have to keep your hands on the wheat? Well, that's not what I mean.

They're just slowing us down. I mean, all this extra weight in the back is just slowing us down. Yeah. Where you going?

Ever mix lemonade and beer, it's great. It is Mr. and Mrs. Smith, ain't it? Well let's not hang around. Thank you. Just see Burton, Miss Smith? Don't be gross. I'll just pop in and get you some lemonade and fitties. Thank you, Miss Smith.

Okay, Hot Shot. We're lied.

Well, all right. So uh

Uh the cops uh they chase him again, but old Ron gets away and uh as he's driving uh he pulls the girl because she was like kind of keeping lookout and the cops keep running into one another and then he pulls her

So safety first everybody. Notice no one has a seatbelt, so fuck. Um

Seatbelts weren't really a thing in the seventies that people cared about.

No, they were not. And how are all these people dead?

Yeah.

Uh yeah. The cop and the old man who was kidnapped were towed back into the sheriff's office, and that leads to our next list.

Yeah, let me give you a hand, Mr. Lewis. There we go. Yeah, the water's cold this time of year.

Oh, uh that that's correct. Uh here is ten dollars. Uh you may retain the difference. Beyblane, I can't find a church key. Uh, Mr. Lewis. Mr. Lewis. Uh huh. This way, sir. Oh

Shove off, will you? I can find the free myself. Steady, sir. There's no need for alarm when subjected to police protection. Choo-cha-cha. Oh boy. Choo cha. I l I live right over there, over in the tracks, right in that little house.

A natural mistake. This is where I hang my hat. In this structure, all may seem safe and warm.

Served and protected. Yeah, well, I pre I prefer the smell of a bakery. I prefer the smell of a bakery. Oh, Uncle Dick. What time does the balloon go up? Uh

See there, Mr. Lewis. You're in competent hands now. Mother stuck me with a nitpicker.

Thank you.

I see you ran into the kids.

Uh, the suspect uh reversed his direction and accelerated directly toward me. Forced to take evasive action, I swerved and inadvertently inverted my vehicle into a drainage ditch, Harry.

Of course.

And what can I do for you, sir?

I am Mr. Charlick, attorney at law.

I represent Mr. Chao Long and... in an entirely separate action against the identical miscreant.

Mr. Cho Fong.

I see. He must be talking about who? Oh, if you don't mind waiting in the other room, I'll be able to give you my full attention in just a few minutes, all right? Ah, thank you, sir. This way, gentlemen, immediately seating on the floor.

Is this the way? Well, there must be some way out of this place. Would you all like for me to handle that, sir? Well, I don't care.

I don't care.

Thank you.

Sure. I got an idea.

Save it.

Welcome to Pucker Bush Country Club. Dorothy Kirch.

What are you doing here? I've got you two? Uh excuse me, sir. Please don't annoy the female prisoner. Yes. Uh other parents. Thank you.

Thank you.

What if you frighten me, sir? Just relax me and stuff at home. Ah, Mr. Chownick!

Aren't you permitted to sit down and play a hand of poker? They say it wants to make a tie! Poker!

Well, I don't usually ain't dull.

If that's the only action going.

On just my trimilopic. Fine, we gotta see right here for you. Thank you, sir.

Alright, uh

The they are driving and uh the uh cop sets up a roadblock. It's not really roadblock, he just parks his car sideways and they go around that quite easily. As they go up the hill, however, the car starts a chuggling, they're running out of gas and that leaves

This is how everyone

Everyone should podcast.

I don't care.

I don't get it. You're telling me there are podcasts without clips?

Thanks.

Apparently.

Fucking weirdos.

It's an old one, Hooper.

Thank you so much.

You are kidding, aren't you?

Oh uh huh, yeah.

Out of gas?

Well

Yeah.

Yeah, but uh but listen, you know Christineer's gas station.

Farwell's corner, about two miles the other side of those woods.

You're screwed, Hoover.

Oh no, no we're not. It it it's cool. Uh hey, you see those three water tanks down there? That's G. I. Jackson's farm. He's this flipped out dude who shoots at anybody who comes close.

Yeah, so what?

And uh and I see a White House down there with a green barn and uh bunch of oranges around it. Yeah, that's Marilyn Becker's house. They're in Honolulu.

Honolulu.

Creo que hay alguien que mira a los animales.

They pushed the car down to this farmhouse that they saw.

Uh Ron's kinda working on the car, just make sure everything's all right, and this leads to our next clip.

It's how it's

Need to podcast.

Podcast, I'm telling you.

This is the only way to podcast. And if you're telling me that that you're not doing clips on your podcast, then bitch you ain't podcasting, all right?

That's how you do it.

Yeah.

If I can't do clips on my podcast, then I'm not podcasting.

Podcast. Like on occasion I get it, if it's a foreign language film you can't do in the clip, but we better be clipping more than not.

Is there anybody around?

Oh, bitchin, we we could go take a look around the house.

You know, the thing I always hate about cars is they're gorgeous on the outside, but they're so ugly and dirty under the hood, you know?

Hey, look at that.

Oh it's it's just a surrey.

Oh, where's the fringe on top? I don't know. I guess they blew it.

Do you know how to uh hook it up and drive it?

It's got wheels, doesn't it?

[Silence]

Go get some gas later.

You know, a after we looked around inside the house...

Yeah, this is perfect. I'll I'll uh look around the house while you get some gas, okay? Why can't we go together?

The caretaker might come and catch us. Don't you want to go together? I found another one. Forget it. I got plenty. I'm sorry. Listen.

Why don't you jump up here and we'll take a r a ride through the orchard? Yeah. It'd be really nice. We'll go into the woods. I'd really like you to come with me, darling.

It's too slow. It drives me crazy.

Bye-bye. And hurry up!

I feel like Goldilocks. Watch out for the three bears.

We've covered the south section every which way.

No place they could have gone out here.

Looks like it's on the ground. Over. Come one, come all. We haven't had this much action since Dickie quit the force. Move it, man. Move it.

And out.

Shit on a twisty stick, Sheriff. There ain't nothing else you can do.

Hello, KDD T and get me a patcher. How soon do you want it, Harry? Right now, for Christ's sake.

Thank you.

You got two pokey jokey cars left, Harry. Now I can get you eight. You may not be as fast as Mabel.

They can catch that lickety split zone of yours.

Now you just forget it.

Hey, how much gas did Mabel have in her tank anyway?

Five gallon.

This is Jerry Gallo over at the uh Sheriff's office. Let me speak to Charlie.

All units, this is Harried all units. Hey, Charlie, we've got a flash for you. Yeah, I'll hold on.

Listen, I got a hunch. I think the kids have run out of gas, so I want you to check all the filling stations, see if they've been in there.

And if they do come in Tell'em to call me right away.

Over and out. You ain't going to catch him, Harry.

You stop calling me Harry. Ten seconds, Harry.

Hey, you guys wanna play some poker? What was that?

Joe must stand by for a bulletin from Sheriff of Puckerbush County, Harry Nebold.

Crazy and the case.

Crazy is the game.

To Hoover Nebold, no son of mine.

Whom it seems has seen fit to abscond with and is currently in possession of one bureau.

[Silence]

You can hear.

I want to let you know just a few of the charges that have so far been got no at which you could want to fill up his milk cans.

What you gonna do? Beat you the pigs and chickens? No, my grandma drinks it second destruction of patrol car. Well you want regular lad?

Regular no laugh.

No lead, apple lead, or apple no lead.

Name. Ethel Nordoff was my Bible teacher. Oh miners and water Ethel led Worst life on all six counts any year.

[Silence]

Thank you.

Patrol car 56000. One ambulance 59,000. Shock and injury to one patient. The symptoms of malicious destruction of the hail farm is to be.

Hey right.

Hundred dollars. You see any side of stock car? Using this a pumpkin colored thing with a big number eight painted on the side.

I never seen no race.

The driver's a big bony kid.

With real dumb face.

And he's where not.

A blue windbreaker with hot rod patches all over it.

And uh uh Civil War toy soldier hat.

Never seen a buddy like that in my whole life. Look, he he's got a girl with him.

Kind of a sexuous number in yellow hot pants. But before it starts.

Well if you see him or if he comes in here for gas, you call the sheriff's office right away, you hear?

I surely will. Especially if I see that there girl.

Right, boy.

In Caffrey!

Jeffrey!

Disregard of life, limb, or property.

That I should have taught you to drive, that I should have had you committed to a money cab.

So that your foot could never catch a pedal or your head like a ship now.

Well, I wouldn't go to state.

Yeah. The basketball team's too short. I don't care about that. It's just that you're not allowed to have roommates of the opposite sex. Yes, you can. No, you can't.

Well, it's eighty six percent male at state.

Yeah, but they all look like dupes.

One of your legs.

Who cares what they look like? It's the action that counts.

Uh, I care what they look like. I want nothing but the best. The creme de la creepes, right? Then how come you're going with Hoover? Going with Hoover? You want my breakfast over the phone? No thanks.

going with Hoover. Just take me for a little ride. Or vice versa, which is worthy. Mercy, mercy. Look, have you seen your folks yet? Still connected. They are worthless guts. The misses

Gabriele's gap! How's that? Yeah, I'm fine, Harry. Great!

You don't think I was too rough for anything now, do you?

No, no. You were what was called cool.

Good. You want me to call the boys, Harry?

Thirty-two dollars and sixty-eight cents.

Yeah.

Listen, uh, you know, I think I might have the sixty eight cents. Uh have you got a ten there? Oh.

Think so. Yeah, uh fifty, fi fifty five right, uh listen, uh you got a twenty?

Let's let me see.

One, two, yeah.

And

Three tens. Yeah. Ten? Here?

Thirty. Right. Okay, so uh yeah, here's the here's two dollars.

And uh the sixty-eight cents.

Get on ahead.

Take it easy, buddy. Yeah, same with you. Yeah, well we the only as ones could do it.

Okay?

İzlediğiniz için teşekkür ederim.

Hold hold on. Are you sure you know what you're gonna say?

Yeah, I think so. All right, you push that button right there. You must forgive Dorrit. This is uh she's a little nervous. It's her first time with the show. Hello? You tell me I'll buy him all.

All the beer we can drink after we catch them double goddamn kids.

Yo ho darling, are you there?

This is all on the radio, your mama and papa. We want for you to know we love you and want for you to come home. We are right away now. A device we think that maybe you don't love us and what we try to tell you. You wouldn't forget, we always have given up our...

[Silence]

There we go.

[Silence]

She even kinda in that clip was talking to one of her friends at the phone while he was out getting gas, uh, from the local town idiot, apparently.

And um she she even made mention like like oh I'm not really going out with him. I'm uh and talking about what which college to go to to get the most dudes. And like her friend's like, I don't care how they look, it's all about the action.

Yeah, her friend quite literally was like she wanted to know the length and girth and that was all that she was concerned about.

Yeah, yeah, pretty much. She's just like, listen.

Uh she just wants to bump her numbers up. She's trying to get into the pros or something. I don't know, man, but college I guess is where you do it. Uh

She is exactly the kind of lady that Matt was really hoping he would have met in college.

Pretty much, yeah. That's that's right. Yeah. I mean listen O U U goes out there, there are some ladies who are just looking for numbers, they're not looking for quality, so you know.

Hop to it.

Have yourself a fantastic time.

Yeah.

Uh Anyway, Yeah. No, but seriously, no matter what you do, wash your hands.

Uh so anyway, um the race buddies get there and they're all just fucking hammer drunk and they're going out to get the kids, cops are jumping to the cars and that t is the end of that thirty before we go to the final thirty.

So they pretty much have sex, right? Because she comes into him with him on the shower and then they show them kindness.

That's that's gonna be in the next part.

Yeah. All right. But like

But like Yeah, yeah. That's gonna be in the n the final thirty. That's how the final thirty starts. Yeah.

Yeah, so he pulled the old we are out of gas trick to get laid.

No, no, he was out of gas.

You know what I'm talking about though, right? Where the guy would run the car out of gas but have a like a backup gallon of gas, but basically.

Pretend like they were out of gas so they could just park for a little bit.

Yeah, that's I mean that's true, but he was definitely out of gas'cause they didn't fill her up all that much. So and he had to get all the gas from the gas station and milk containers. Which I hope they clean those out or at least let the people who live there know later because

they fill those leagues up with milk to like feed the family, they're gonna die.

Bye.

Well, it's not gonna be a problem in RFK's uh FDA because gasoline infused milk is just good for the soul or some shit to make up.

Yeah, something. Like, oh, it's gonna help you uh

Uh shit gold. I don't know.

You can turn your gold into piss and you can turn your piss into gold.

Oh my god, the doctor's gonna think you have Crohn's disease.

Mm-hmm.

We should move on.

Anywho, we start the next thirty. Uh Ron gets back from filling up the gas tank and he runs for the house.

House uh

Uh uh in our next clip.

Put the gas in the tank first!

You know, the funny thing is I never liked Marilyn Becker.

Well I'll have to thank her sometime.

We ever have a chance.

Didn't you hear my father on the radio?

Oh yeah, he's uh gonna eat your liver or something, right?

Uh feed it to the cat.

But but really it's it's all the charges against us. I mean, if they ever catch us, we're gonna go to jail for about a thousand years.

Oh really?

Ciao.

I don't know if we're ever gonna be able to go back. Did you hear what I said? I said we wouldn't be able to go back.

I don't care. I don't want to.

I wanna go in forever.

Well, I guess it's just you and me, darlene.

I don't know what's gonna happen, I I guess you'd rather be with somebody else.

I mean, I got this in here.

Eight years and

My father makes me keep my hair all chopped on.

I I could let it grow now.

But you probably wouldn't want

Oh, Darlene. Hi.

Oh right.

All right.

So they hop in the shower, so they go to Bonetown. Uh now all the cops are out and they're kinda even they see'em driving past the house and they're like, Hey, should we keep going? Uh, we can wait and they g go back to more boning'cause you know they're they're fucking kids so they fucking probably did it like eighteen times.

Yeah.

But they didn't enjoy.

I didn't enjoy it every time.

Every time.

No. Well he did every time. She Maybe ten percent.

[Silence]

She's having what she thinks are orgasms. She'll discover something more in college.

So one of the cops at a drunk uh in one of the race cars it ri breaks down, but they're at the house and they find the car. So the cop has the drunk stay there and the drunk finds

beer in the car so he's super excited about that. Cop grabs the sheriff. The kids are getting ready to leave. They back up right into the sheriff's car. So then they destroy the barn and getting out there. We this is now leading into a shit ton of chasings uh where they're always trying to Get

uh in front of the car but he's always able to get away from'em. Well then the drunk pops up and he's laughing hysterically in the back seat and then he starts helping them to escape from all the other cars, even though he's supposed to be helping get the kids. Now he's He's changed allegiances.

Well, they gave him the most amount of booze with the least amount of flack, so now he's on their side.

Yeah, exactly.

Yeah.

So more uh there's a lot of radio chatter in this uh that's just so quick and it just didn't make sense to even try to clip it. But a lot of it like yelling at each other, yelling at other cars, you know, yelling at the other drunks driving. Yeah.

Yeah.

Watch it. It's pretty fucking funny.

Yeah, this is what you should be watching anyway for this movie. You need to be seeing this part of it because this is why we're covering it. I mean, the chase scene is awesome. It's all practically done stuff on a really, really low budget using these like souped.

Up fucking circle track style cars. They're not really meant to do these kinds of jumps, but they're still doing these.

weird twists and turns and jumps and doing these like uh old back dirt road racing techniques and stuff. Yeah. And it looks like a bunch of old school moonshiners. And it's it's it is really fucking cool, but we can't take the time to fucking

describe it because there's so much shit happening all at once and you just have to see it. The car chase in this is worth your time. Yes.

Yes, yes. This chase uh I mean pretty much the whole movie's a car chase, but this this

This specific

Specifically.

Is where where it's at.

Yeah.

This is where all the other things are.

Well, now he's kinda almost boxed in. So they see this cliff and she's like

Let's go over the cliff and he's like, We're gonna die She goes, Don't you love me? He goes, All right, go over the cliff and not kill you. Gotcha So they go over right before they go over the cliff, the drunk's like, Nope, fuck it takes his toupee off and jumps out of the car

They go over the cliff and his dad looks and goes, My God, I killed him because he made him go over the cliff. But they actually make it all the way down.

All four wheels didn't topple over nothing.

Well, all the drunks in the race cars are like, let's fucking do it too because they think it looks cool and they all fucking crash, flip, whatever, and lands down and this leads to our next clip.

My god, I killed him!

All right, Hoover.

Over.

Let's talk.

Your foot out of my face.

Uh Dave.

I don't know.

Hey, two years and 80% of your salary, but until everything is paid for.

Ok, Mabel, vamos ver se você ainda tem.

[Silence]

And I'm dirty.

It's any of your salary.

[Silence]

Well you'll have to resign anyway, Harry. Yeah.

The gig's up. Oh, yeah, you're finished. Shut up, will you? 30% of what? Yeah, who give that.

Hunka job. I wouldn't. That's it, chip head. You're fired. You can't fire us.

Wait.

Sheriff, the kids want.

He could get a ride on any double the goddamn short track in the country. All right.

All right. So they get back into town. It's Halloween night.

But they are famous. Everyone's cheering'em. Everyone's like, Yeah, this is awesome, you know, all the kids.

They get back to the racetrack and this leads to our final clip.

This is how you should podcast.

This is definitely how you should podcast.

Looks different at night.

Yeah.

Well it's supposed to be. I mean it's Halloween, you know. Yeah, right.

Help me out.

Thanks, Hubert.

What's the trip? Bye. You know, I I'm letting it grow. What? My hair. It's getting longer already. I can feel it.

Like you said, Hoover.

Ride's over.

Night. It wasn't me at all, was it?

Car.

Hey boy. That ain't no way to treat a lady. Get in. This side, boy. Well? Start her up.

Thank you.

I wanna just state I feel like the guy that actually owned the car that Ron Howard's character stole whenever he's like talking to him there at the end and having him drive it again. It seems like he's getting older and he's throwing his money towards owning more than racing because he keeps putting all of his

money into the car. And I think this is ultimately what he was looking for was to find a driver that was good enough to run his cars so that they could make money together. And I think that's what he has now with Ron Howard and that's what they were setting up. Yep.

Yep, yep. Agreed. And so now he's like, Hey we and Thirty percent of his earnings till everything's fixed and

probation. But he'll have the job as a race car driver, what he always wanted to be. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. He would have been one hell of a moonshine runner too. Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, anyway.

Anyway, they uh they run the track.

Roll credits.

[Silence]

STO STO FUCKING SUCK!

Alright.

All right.

God damn, why does that always seem so mean?

I don't know. It's almost like someone has a real fucking heart on for hating on this show.

Yeah, man. So weird. I wonder who that is.

Who would take the time to write those hateful lyrics about us? Jesus.

I know. God Well, us, because the only people who hate us this much is

Yeah, no one really wants to put that much effort into us but us.

Yep, exactly.

Bye.

Oh man. This was a fun movie. This was a really fun watch. Uh we watched it on Tubi and it was a four by three print, so it didn't really fill the screen.

Yeah.

Little rough, looked like it might have been a DVD transfer. I honestly don't know if a better transfer of Eat My Dust exists out there than what we saw. I've only ever seen it on DVD before this, and it wasn't my DVD.

Yeah.

Like I just watched it with somebody else when it was their DVD before, and that's how I had seen it. Uh it definitely holds up for my warm and fuzzies from the first time that I remember watching it. Uh I really did enjoy watching it again. It's not the greatest of these that we've seen.

This is kind of the first sort of step down, but all of its flaws are really Because it's really low budget and it didn't have the money to do what all these other movies do.

Yeah. Yeah, and all the cars were cool and yeah, so yeah, and there's nothing there's nothing wrong with this.

That drive over the cliff thing that you explained, I just kind of let it be while you were doing it. But they basically did this like dangerous run where it is like this super steep hill. There's multiple

There's multiple detail.

There's multiple tire tracks already there, so you know it's like this adventure like

trick thing that people have done before and they're taking all of these various cars down there. And it's obvious when the other cars that are rolling and uh crashing and fucking up, it's obvious that the drivers that are in those cars are purposely trying to make those things happen.

But they're still making those things happen and rolling down the hills inside the cars and it's fucking dangerous and stupid and looks awesome and is fun to watch.

watch. Yes. It's just a fucking

It's a fun film. You're not gonna learn anything about yourself.

Uh you're not gonna and you're not gonna you're not here for the acting. You're you're here for all the car chasing and it gives you plenty of that. Yeah. And a lot

And a lot of the shots were limited by the budget that they had, but they still found a way to do some really incredible stunt work with some really well shot and thought-out plant sequences that were really well put together, particularly when

Once all of the drunk ass fucking uh race car drivers are driving cops and the race car drivers are even getting fucked up by this kid because of how good he is, to the point where they're like, Look, you should just let the kid go because somebody's gonna hire.

He's better than all of us already.

Ready. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Trust me, someone's hiring this kid.

Right.

It was fucking it was a really fun ending and it really kinda makes me laugh and I really just kinda like the way that you know it's it's a a good old fashioned

Yee-ha kind of ending that you want. Yeah. Like perfect drive-in fodder. That's where you want to be when you meet Eat My Dust. It's not going to be anywhere near the quality of what we've watched previously in our cartoons movies.

But you're still gonna have fun.

Yeah, you're gonna have a fucking blast. Uh even

Especially if you're into like car movies like that shit.

I mean Cannonball was super low budget, but they worked well beyond what budget that they had. And this was even less of a budget than Cannonball, for sure.

For sure. Yeah. Oh definitely. Yeah.

Yeah.

All right, I'm done. I'm good. I don't need to talk about it anymore if you don't, right?

Uh no, I'm good. I think we've said all you could possibly fucking say about Eat My Dust.

Yeah. Why don't we take the break here? We'll uh play the show housekeeping and when we come back.

We will have a song that quite literally was created mere seconds.

Or we actually did the ed I did the edit for the show, like Matt edits.

It's going to be

Gonna be like stealing a car and having sex all the time. That's what that song's gonna be like.

Uh that may be what the subject matter of the song is, but I can't really promise that.

It's what it's gonna feel like for the listeners. Cort personally guarantees it's gonna feel like you stole the car and had a ton of sex.

I absolutely do not, those are Matt's only words and he cannot.

Not fa

Say that.

Ah, here's the fucking break, Jesus.

If you've decided you can't get enough of the show and would like to check out more of it, we're available at LegionPodcasts.com Just do a quick search for Cinema PsyOps or just enter this entire URL into your browser. www.LegionPodcasts.com forward slash cinema-scyops dash podcast.

Also available along with all of the fellow Legioneers on the Legion Discord chat. And now let's give you a rundown of the memes and how you're going to get them through Cinema Psyops. The easiest place to go is to subscribe to our Instagram feed, which

is our main meme repository at cinema underscore psyops, or you could also follow the Facebook page of Cinema Psyops because they are immediately posted there after they get posted to the Instagram repository. And you can also check out the

Facebook group of cinema psyops and the memes are shared there. I am available on Facebook as Court Psyops because the memes are also shared there as well. Thanks for listening to the show. I still can't believe that you're subscribed to us or here every week just like us.

[Music]

Light shines bright.

Money bold schemes.

On the Halloween night Mischief.

We've been here.

In his veins.

Racing hearts ignite.

He's the kid on a chase.

With dreams wild and free The heart of the night Right in Mabel, you see, darling's in the stands.

As the engines roar loud.

[Music]

Uva's hot races.

He's feeling so proud.

So proud.

[Music]

With a stolen ride.

He takes off.

With glee.

[Music]

He's the kid on the chase.

With dreams wild

Wild and free.

In the heart of the night, Brady Mabel you see

[Music]

I'm not gonna comment on the fucking song'cause I'm not even gonna get started with that.

I mean sex. All of it just orgy sex.

There is no song in existence that I can guarantee would do that for everybody, let alone single thing.

It's gonna make you it's gonna make you feel like you're just in a room of sweaty naked people having a good time.

Well there are some metal songs that'll definitely make you feel like that. That level of discomfort for sure.

For sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I I never said you were gonna like it.

I just said that's what it's gonna feel like.

Yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely.

Oh Jesus Christ. Well you know what it feels like? It feels like we should just end this fucking show so

We really should before I start saying some really fucked up shit.

While you're out there.

Well you're on

While you're out there wondering what the fuck up shit Matt's about to say is, kick the fuck out of this weekend.

[Silence]

In the town

Town the fucker bush, how we night When the evil's got mischief inside, sheriff Harry's somebody sick at Races on the line, gotta Big boba's in the ri-

[Music]

Dali's high round.

Roaring down the The wild free.

I'll just wait it!

And you feel the thrill.

Real.

While Jones goes distracted, he makes his move.

Smooth!

Stealin' Mabel, he's got the groove

Friends hoppin', racing sparks in the air Deputy's on the tail, but they haven't a care. Crashing through a diner, splinters and flies. Sheriff's in a fury can't believe his eyes.

Roarin' down the track.

Wild free

Free.

Got the power, just wait and see Listen, can you peel the brill?

Real.

Calling my side

Hey, can you hear me? Yep.

Yep.

Alright, awesome. And hopefully you can hear.

Yeah.

Uh it certainly can.

Alright. Did you hear the error effect that was going through with that too? Yeah.

Yeah.

Alright, I gotta make sure that that doesn't happen again on both car parts because I think it's recording. Let me check.

Yeah, yeah.

[Silence]

Looks like it is and go ahead and talk again.

Hello, hello, hello.

You are coming through loud and clear.

That's all good to see.

Let me get back to the Zoom.

Brazil.

And we record here as backup. Recording in progress.

That backup for recording in uh Zoom has saved my ass more than plenty of times.

Bet with our old system and our new system and just uh everything that has been set up. So uh I got the clips, I'm ready to rock for uh for yours. Um

Let's do it.

Alright, awesome. Let me

Let me Yeah, I can read that just fine.

Come on, just a second, let me get a grip drink and then I'll count in and do the yell.

Do the yell.

That is not a real guarantee. This is Matt being hyperbolic and my lawyers' heads are about to explode. So we're gonna take the break here. We're gonna play the Legion Patreon ad and we will play some kind of music that will exist quite literally seconds before the edit of this episode begins. And when we come back, we will also commentate on

Yeah.

Racing hard, dude.

My mind, Matt.

Yeah. Three, two, one.

Instead he called me Hoover because I put him into a depression.

Субтитры создавал DimaTorzok

That's actually really good for the dad.

Yeah, this is like five minutes two, I'll start jumping around here.

I don't remember something.

Sounds like a lynching.

I waited until now to start actually drinking some caffeine.

I don't know, Jesus.

Just so it would energize me for the show.

Yeah, so try to counteract how high you're gonna get.

No, well yeah. I mean I'm already

Alrighty.

No well yeah.

I mean sort of but um No, I wanted to wait for the caffeine'cause I wanted it to start later in the day and last longer.

Yeah, fellow.

Yeah, because it's Sunday and I don't want to work tomorrow, so I'm counteracting the Sunday blues by forcing myself to stay up to later tonight.

Yeah. Yeah.

Well you gotta fight those blues. You know how I fight the Sunday blues?

But you're drunk.

All the fucking time.

Just get fucked up. Yeah, if I'm not working anymore, that's what I do. I'm just I'm fucked up all the time.

I mean I still go to work tomorrow, but I I'll just be hung over. I'll just treat Monday as horribly as it can be.

[Silence]

There was one I had to cut out of uh my clips.

Yeah.

It wasn't like that it was a particularly bad hateful pejorative, but the implications

እእእእእእእእእእእእን

Редактор субтитров А.Семкин Субтитры сделал DimaTorzok We got the implication, I get it.

And my present position precludes presumption.

I love this guy because he's so like pro

[Silence]

Man, that bit really went dark fast, didn't it?

And if you want to catch them, I suggest you call the strategic...

If it weren't for dark bits we'd have no bits at all.

That's the thing is like whenever I say something fucked up and then you decide to pry about it, I'm like, all right, I guess we're going all in on this one.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm like, uh no man, I gotta I gotta see where this goes.

How fucked up is Cort gonna make this and how will I be inappropriate in my response?

We each have a shovel. We're each gonna dig at this hole.

Which one calls chicken first and stop?

See how we handle it.

And then whoever calls chicken, then we both stop and see how deep we've gone.

Ha ha ha.

And in both cases it's definitely been much further than we intended.

My favorite is how you put everyone in the drunk tank.

I'll be with you shortly.

Expect to get my just dessert.

I'm guessing that that's because he can justify it by saying that

[Silence]

Getting pissed off.

I'll put it in your report.

And everybody is actually drunk too. That's kind of a nongoing thing. Even the race car drivers who the cops fucking hire later.

Thank you.

Everyone's just drinking.

Drinking.

Alcohol as well.

Yeah.

Drink drunk driving wasn't such a big problem.

Yeah, I mean I think I think this is back when you could still drink while driving.

Not just.

Yeah.

Yep. Yeah. So yeah, this is before the all that wokeness got a hold of us and we couldn't drink and drive anymore.

Fucking liberal commies.

Before drunk driving got cancelled by wokeness.

Yep, I won't miss, yep. What is this, China?

Do you remember that old song, Chloe?

I sure do.

I think we do.

Yes, what?

Yes, we seem to have company.

Субтитры сделал DimaTorzok But

This dialogue feels like it was written by Paul Bartell on a

Thanks, Rain Man. Well I mean what else you gonna tell me?

Yeah, it was like written by Paul Bartel on a c like a cocktail napkin and then handed to the director.

No, I've got women over thirty have the ugliest elbows in the world, don't you think?

What the fuck is going on?

[Silence]

That's nice.

Is it dead? Is it nice? Go fuck yourself.

What for? You still have to keep your hands on the wheel? Well, I found I mean

That's exactly what he means.

They're just throwing us down.

Yeah.

The weight in the back is just slowing us down.

Yeah. No, no, that's that's what he's coming up with.

I mean, I think that's a good thing He's trying to get away from some shit and yes those people are slowing him down.

But also it's slowing him down from the other goal of trying to

Thank you.

What he doesn't know is that the thing that's truly impeding him is his

That ginger hair of his

Oh wait, I'm gorgeous. I can't make fun of people for not being gorgeous.

Th that's right, I can.

I'm jumping around, so don't worry

Yeah, we shouldn't

I'm not having a seizure.

Which country club?

Despite the amount of damage you do to your brain every weekend with drinking alcohol, this is not what is

What is the result?

Yeah. Clip is ending.

Anybody who comes close.

Yeah, so what's me just?

That's me jumping around.

Yeah, that's Marilyn Becky's house.

Not that we need to recover the time and just get bored easy.

Get bored easy.

ADHD kicking in on that one. That's a one minute clip.

Oh, I'm already gone.

Yeah, I really think I should get diagnosed, dude. I think I may have it too. But my

But my mystery.

My flavor is definitely a different spicy than your spicy.

Yeah, but uh I will say this, you d I'm gonna get you a t shirt undiagnosed, but something ain't right.

Yeah, that's that's not inaccurate. We should move on.

That was clip number eight down court.

Okay.

Alright.

Bitch, and we we could go take a look around the house.

Yeah, yeah, you know why you wanna know why it was good take a look around the house, don't you?

Yeah, he wants to try and find a bed to throw it on.

And he runs for the house.

House uh

uh uh in our next clip.

Next clip.

Jesus Christ. Well the fucker, I I got twelve.

Twelve. What's weird is I also have twelve for my clips for next week and it's quite the same thing where there's like every little scrap of dialogue including like multi long ones and then tiny little like twelve second ones.

Second ones. Yeah. Yeah. This final thirty actually pisses me off though because in the final kinda like chase push there's a ton of dialogue but it's all broken up so much I couldn't even get it.

Yeah.

Oh this is that sequence where he does that weird teleporting thing'cause he knows it's

Yeah, yeah, because he's supposed to be going so fast'cause it's time for sex.

Didn't you hear my father on the radio? Oh yeah, he's uh gonna eat your liver or something, right?

Now be the cat.

But really it's just all the charges against us.

No wonder he says. If ever catches we're gonna go to jail for about a thousand years.

Just not on all the steroids.

Yeah, I think his dumbass is looking for a long term relationship and she's just looking for a good time right now.

That's exactly it.

Yeah.

If you were just looking for a good time like that.

Well I think here's what it is. He's in love with her. But she she's just looking for

That's right.

That's what I'm talking about.

Yeah he went

Yeah, he wants he wants a relationship. He's actually catching feelings.

And she just wants to have a good time right now.

Make my hair all chopped off.

Man. Well, talk about a r roll reversal.

Yeah, you would think that, but typically that does happen a lot more than you would think.

Yeah it does. Yeah.

Hi!

Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people just wanna have some fun.

Ride's over.

When she said rides over, she meant him riding her.

Or her riding him.

Wasn't me at all, was it?

It was always the car, Mint.

No, it wasn't even the fucking car. That's the thing. It was just the whole experience and the thrill of it all.

It was the speed.

Yeah, it was just the thrill of it all and what she could make this innocent fucking kid do.

It's not the car at all, man. She's fucking nuts.

Mm-hmm.

Trust me, Rod, you're a lot better off, all right. That was that's gonna be a messy, messy

The car

She's gonna get some poor college kids ass.

He's the kid on a chase.

Dreams wild and free in the heart of the night.

Right in Mabel, you see, darling's in the stands.

As the engines roar loud Uva's hot races.

He's feeling so proud.

[Music]

With a stolen ride.

He takes off with glee.

[Music]

He's the kid on the chase!

With dreams wild and free in the heart of the night.

Buddy Mabel you see

[Music]

The sirens wail.

As they tead through the field

Oh Jesus Christ. Well you know what it feels like? It feels like we should just end this fucking show so

We really should before I start saying some really fucked up shit.

While you're out there While you're out there wondering what the fuck it up shit Matt's about to say is, kick the fuck out of this weekend, make it your bitch.

Oh Jesus.

Oh man.

Alright, now I need to stop the recording.

Recording stopped.

Legion Podcasts - All Shows

More episodes

Chapters

Creators and Guests

What is Legion Podcasts - All Shows?