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Ever wonder why success doesn't always equal fulfillment?
Join Tim Salmans on "Powerful and Unpolished" as he challenges the status quo with this question: what if the key to fulfillment lies in recognizing and breaking free from energy-draining patterns? This podcast isn't just about success stories; it's about the unspoken challenges that high-achieving individuals face. Tim Salmans will unpack the complexities that cause frustration, offering tangible strategies to navigate personal challenges within professional landscapes while maintaining your authentic self. Subscribe now for a transformative journey - where authenticity meets success on your own terms.
Welcome back, everybody. Welcome to Powerful and Unpolished. I'm Tim Selmans, your host. Again, you hear that every episode, so you're probably tired of it, but here I am. we-- I invited back a wonderful brother, friend of mine who was on one of my earliest episodes, I think like the second or third. And, Duke Jackson or Daniel Duke Jackson, he is...
He's a brother of mine. I've known him for many, many years, but, I brought him back 'cause he is a professional stuntman. He's got a very dynamic life. He's been a preach- grew up as a preacher's son, traveled the world, has a lot of world experience. So we're gonna dig into some of that from this episode.
what I do wanna honor about Duke is Duke has been a professional stuntman, hell, ever since I've known him, but, for what, 30 years? Yeah. I started doing the live shows in '92, so what's that? 34 years ago? Oh, yeah. 34 years ago. And so, he started out with one of his, ... He was more of a high dice, a high fall specialist, but he's branched out.
He does so many other types of, of stunts and, you know, developed that skill and his, his portfolio on how to be able to, achieve, you know, great results as far as, you know, putting on a show and, and making it look real and so that's very cool. And the reason why I said he grew up as a preacher's son is 'cause that's a whole another dynamic of his world and how he's grown up and explored the world around him and as he's traveled through life.
So I think it might bring some good conversation today. I do wanna reiterate and voice that Powerful and Unpolished is here to just honor the individual, honor the soul. It is sponsored by my company, Insights for Choice. Insights for Choice is all about transformation, powerful transformation, leadership that is honored both in the essence of an individual as well as the purposefulness of honoring all involved as far as growing yourself, looking for possibility, living into the future, creating your future, and understanding that, you know, life isn't always, one direction.
It goes many directions as we evolve and grow ourselves. So Duke, I wanna thank you very much for, for being here today. Thank you for joining us again. Yeah, it's a pleasure to be here. Thank you for asking me back. A couple of things kinda stood out to me, like when you were talking about the intro there, and you said life isn't always a straight line, and, I was thinking, "Yeah, sometimes it's a spiral."
Like you're just kind of, you're sometimes you're spiraling around kind of the same thing, you know, sometimes getting closer and sometimes getting further away. But, you know, it feels like anyways, to me, sometimes it feels like a spiral. That's great awareness. But yeah, man, it's good to be back. Oh, the other thing you said was, and you meant it as a compliment, and I take it as a compliment, of course.
But you said, he likes to, put on, he's-- he can put on a good show, I think, or he likes to put on a good show, make things look good. And I was like, "Whoa. Yeah, there's a, there's a great analogy of my ego." Well, it's, yeah, the ego's always gonna be there, right? We're always gonna be dealing with the ego, but I, I say it in a sense of just really honoring you.
you know, we're just gonna talk a-as the listener listens 'cause we're gonna bounce back and forth. I mean, that's kinda how I do in my world. I just go with the inspiration a lot of the times or try to. And the reason why I say Duke puts on a good show is I've seen him in so many live events. I've seen him on film.
it's so funny when I'm watching TV and, you know, this head peaks up and I'm like, "Hey, I know that guy." Been like that for years. But the reason why I say he puts on a good show is I know that when you were doubling for Robert Redford in Walk in the Woods, I believe it was, you had a stunt where you tumbled down the mountain and the other co-star that you were working with, his stuntman, you guys were working off of each other and you, during like the first take or the second take, you broke your hand.
Yeah. Yeah. My wrist. Right. And so you broke your wrist, and you had like four or five more takes after that, so you had to keep going through it. Yeah. That was a rough one. It is a rough one, but I, I put that out there to say, you know, you're out there to create an experience. I mean, you putting on a good show is actually put-- creating an experience for the viewer, for the witnesser to watch.
And so your level of commitment is something to be respected. Well, thank you, sir. Appreciate that. You're welcome. So knowing that I'm kinda going down this r- this line of thinking, we're gonna dig back into how the hell did you ever become a stuntman? What was it? W- Did you know it as a kid or... Talk to us.
yeah, it's a good question. It's funny, I'll just say real quick because I'm usually on the other end of this 'cause I have my, my own podcast, Philosophical Fall Guy, where I interview stunt guys, and, I'm usually the one asking this question. But it's cool to be on the other side too. So no, I didn't, it didn't occur to me as a kid really.
I did do a lot of stuff like crazy stuff, and, I was always challenging myself, and, I was into, If there was something that looked challenging or kind of scary to me, I would attempt to do it. or even if other kids would, dare me, you know, something like that, I was kinda that guy that would, that would attempt it.
not always, but, you know, sometimes, and sometimes it didn't end so well, but I have to say, I di- I really didn't know that about you, and when you said that, I was, like, going, "Okay, no wonder why we're brothers," because for me, like, I'm so... You know, I... Yeah, I have a podcast. You have a podcast. I'm s- sort of an introvert, to be honest with you.
I do a lot of extroverted stuff, but I'm an introvert, right? And for me, when I was a kid, it was like, "Challenge me to do something, and I'll do stupid anything a- anywhere," right? Right. You know, like I had to prove something. Yeah. So it's funny you said that. And I don't know if I was trying to prove something to somebody else or to myself, but, yeah, I was definitely always trying to prove something.
Yeah, maybe that's why we had a, a bond early on in our relationship, and we had that similarity. But as I got older, I did get into martial arts and rock climbing and, stuff that was a little bit outside the box, you know, 'cause I came up, pretty suburban America where, you know, played soccer and football and, track and wrestling and all those stuff in school.
But, as I got older, I was more interested in, like, individual kind of, I guess you could say, extreme sports more, you know? tried bungee jumping when it first came out. you know, always, always wanted to live on the West Coast to be a surfer, and, like, Point Break was, like, one of my favorite movies and stuff coming up, you know.
And, of course... And I liked, I liked the martial arts world a lot, especially in high school. And, I went to a filming shoot that was happening in Denver, where I grew up, as actually my mom happened to be in a, in a film class in the local community college, and they happened to be filming a low-budget martial arts film at downtown Denver, and, they were letting the film students come to the set to just check it out, I guess.
So I went there, with the permission of the, the teacher, and I watched the, the guys do, fight scenes all day, you know, choreographing fight scenes and taking reactions, and, like, I was already doing that with my buddies, like, for fun. So when I saw, like, "Oh, man, these guys are doing this, and it looks so good, and they're getting paid lots of money, and it looks so fun."
And then, one of the, one of the stunt guys did an actual high fall, which is, you know, they jump out of the building from... I think it was about eight stories, and he, he goes into an airbag, which, you know, catches him and collapses. And, man, I don't know, man. I saw that, I just... Something inside of me just really clicked, and I just was like, "I gotta, I gotta do that."
So from that point on, I started pursuing it however I could. My in was through, live shows because I think still at a lot of the theme parks, but especially in the early '90s, it was really popular to have live stunt shows in the theme parks. So wild- like it was Wild West shows a lot, and that's my first show was a Wild West show.
And then, I started to go and do some overseas work a little bit more with a Wild West show and, came back and decided to... Well, before that, I did do a short stint in New Mexico, where I tried to break into the film business as a stuntman, and I got a acting role actually on the movie The Cowboy Way.
and, and I got my SAG card, which is a Screen Actors Guild, which is, is, is a really tough thing to get and, I was very fortunate. I got it the first movie I auditioned for, the first role I tried to get, I got my SAG card, so. You were the golden child. Yeah, I guess so, man. It was- At least for that role, at least for that, that one.
Like after that it wasn't so easy but, that first one, yeah, man, I just kind of walked right in and got my SAG card, or SAG eligibility anyways. Then moved out to LA, you know, to try to pursue the dream of being a stuntman Went out with a couple buddies that I met, or a buddy that I met coming up, doing stunts, and we just tried to make a go of it.
We learned how to, you know, hustle sets, which is what we did back then in the day. You'd go and you'd get like, shoot sheets from the, the permits office, and then you'd go over to this, place called Bill's, which was a stuntman's, answering service, and he had information there about what movies were being shot.
And then, you'd go out to the set, and you would try to meet the coordinator without knowing who he was or what he looked like. This was before the internet. And it was a really rough way. It was really, it was really tough, but you just-- you spend-- you waste a lot of time, a lot of gas, got kicked off a lot of sets.
But we kept at it and, you know, finally, you know, I, I got to go to Japan, to do a live stunt show, which was a r- it was a really good opportunity, and, really I fell in love with Japan, fell in love with a Japanese woman over there, married her. And then came back and, had, had a little money in my pocket saved up from being in Japan, and a few more connections because there was guys that were doing that show that were also working pretty steady in the business, or at least starting to.
And, just started trying to hustle and, go back to hustle again. And, and then I was doing live shows on the side where I was doing like the Batman show in, in, Valencia, California, and I had a, a bad fall in the show. Now, that was about, what, three stories? how many-- how high up were you? Well, so the, the, the gag was, you had to get yanked up f- feet first, so you're upside down, and it would take you to a height of probably close to 20 feet.
And you're hanging upside down, and you're hanging out, over a concrete. You know, the s- the floor of the whole arena was concrete, so you're just hanging out over that. But there is part of the set that was kinda coming out, that w- looked like a, an ice cream cone, basically a false front. so anyways, when I got hoisted up to the top, which happens very quickly, weights drop and, and make you go up, I had come out of the safety clip, which is not supposed to happen.
They still can't exactly say how that happened. But I came out and I fell, you know, I was upside down. I bounced off part of the set, the ice cream cone. It flung me around and I landed on my back on the concrete. It, it like shook me up. As you can imagine, I just kinda hit the ground and I s- I describe it as like hitting your funny bone really hard, but my whole body felt like that.
Oh, God. It was just like this vibrating
Very uncomfortable feeling that kind of going through my body. I never lost consciousness, through the whole thing. but, we had to sh-stop the show, in, in the middle of the show and, they had to, bring the, emergency technics te- emergency techs out and the ambulance and took me to the hospital.
Determined I had broken, two vertebrae in my, my neck and had torn rotator cuff, on my shoulder. To add to all that, my, my now wife, who was dating me at the time, was visiting from Japan, and it was the first show that she had come to watch And, so I was really worried about her being in the audience, you know, English not her first language, not knowing what's going on.
So I had some, some buddies of mine find her and bring her down, and she rode in the ambulance with me to the hospital. But, yeah, funny thing as part of the story, they're on the, the radio calling in my accident. They're bringing Batman in, right? And the guy's like-- He's like, "Yes, we have, you know, a mid-twenties white male.
he has fallen a good distance, possible head and neck injuries and a Batman costume." You know, this is the day before Halloween, mind you. Day before Halloween. On the other end, I hear somebody come on the radio, and it's-- and they're like trying to hold back. You can tell they're trying to hold back a laugh.
And they're like, "Wait, did you s- did you say Batman costume?" And the guy's like, "Yes. Yeah. we're coming from, you know, Magic Mountain. He was playing Batman." They're like, "Oh, okay. Okay." So anyways, they get to the hospital, and they open the door, and they wheel me out, and I'm in my whole Batman garb. And the costume they had was pretty legit.
they tried to make it look like the movie as much as they could. And I remember one of the people there, they were s- they were a little surprised. They're like, "Oh my God, it's really Batman." 'Cause the, 'cause the l- the costume looked so good and everything. Think of it like this, though. Had you been Superman, you could have, like, flown away and not hit the f- hit the ground.
Yeah. But instead, you were Batman, and, you know- Well, it's funny you mentioned Superman- ... his superpower is his money, so ... because I was in the hospital in the ICU, and I had been in the ICU for, I think just one night. It's been a long time, and I can't remember for sure, but they moved me to my own room finally.
I finally got a, a, a TV because they didn't have any TVs or anything in the ICU. So Ayami, my, my now wife, she was with me, and I tell her to turn the TV on, and turned the TV on. And, I bet you-- I think I've told you, but I bet people watching wouldn't be able to guess the first thing that came on the television.
Do you, do you remember? Go ahead. Tell 'em. So it was Christopher Reeves, who played Superman, ironically, sitting in his wheelchair, completely paralyzed. actually, I think he's a quadriple- he was a quadriplegic, if I remember right. But up to that point, I never-- it never really dawned on me how critically serious this injury could have been.
When I saw him there, I actually broke down crying, and I realized how lucky I was. But I don't say the word lucky. I believe I was blessed and protected. and so I thanked God that I wasn't in that wheelchair, at that point, and I realized that, it led to some other realizations of I wasn't really, leading my, my life in the best path that I actually could be and, started to, try to make some, some changes at that time.
I say started because I relapsed and went back on stuff a lot even after that. But it was kind of a turning point that said, "You really need to, wake up," I think is the best way to put it. So is it fair... Let me ask you this, 'cause as you're sharing that, and I wanna thank you, Duke, for being so genuine with, the experience.
Thinking about how you were up until that point, now, you had been injured, you had been beat up, and you have the s- fortitude and strength to kinda push through it. I mean, obviously, if you're breaking your wrist and then still continuing to work, you know, that's a different, different caliber of person.
It's just, just what it is. It's not, not a judgment good, bad either. It's just an awareness, right? But up until that point, 'cause you had been, like, kind of exploring this opportunity and being this, and you had worked through injuries before It's kinda easy to take for granted. It's like going, you know, "Hey, I got hurt, but this is what happened."
And for you to have that moment, I, I don't believe in coincidences. I believe that, you know, we get messages in-- throughout our life as we go, right, along our path. And you on your path at that moment, seeing, you know, Christopher Reeve, who everything that he went through, I mean, he was, he was such a, a, a champion for so many because he, he was, he was an advocate.
I mean, you know, he happened to play a hero in the movies, but, you know, who, who his character showed up to be in real life was a real-life hero, right? So for you to have that experience, my question is, is up until that point, was it kinda like, you know, youthful, I don't even know what you call it, I mean, I've heard it before, but kinda like youthful taking it for granted like, "Oh, no, you know, I'll never get hurt like that," or, you know.
Yes. See, I was 26 at that time, so I think I still had Invincible? Invincible complex, that, that you have when you're younger. You just think you're gonna live forever, and you can't really be hurt, you know, I guess. You know, you just kinda... You know, I just always kind of was like, "Yeah, I'll be okay.
Somehow or another, I'll be okay," you know. "I'll, I'll get up. I'll, I'll be fine," you know. You know, I think when I was a kid, you know, I idolized, John Wayne, which is where I got my name Duke from 'cause my given name is, Daniel. I think a lot of that came from that sort of, idolizing that kind of, "Eh, I'm a guy, I'm a man, I'm tough.
I can make it. I can take it. I'll just dust off and, you know, get up and be fine." And, you had to realize that, you know, you're, you're-- you can, you can break and die just like e- everybody else. And to, and to be-- to realize that and to also be thankful that, I didn't, that, somehow I was spared that, you know, because the fall that I took, you know, it could have been...
I mean, from that height and that position, it could have been bad. I mean, you know, I mean, Christopher Reeves, you know, he fell off a, a horse going probably pretty fast but, you know, a horse is six feet off the ground, you know, and look what happened to him. Well, having known you and known you especially at that time 'cause we were, you know, we were definitely in communication and connection at that time as well, you know, you were tested.
You were not only tested physically for what you had to go through to, to come back, but, you know, for a while there, you, you kinda had to toy with the idea that, you know, this career that you had been developing, building, you know, was like something that you had to put on a shelf, you know, sort of thing is...
I remember you sort of struggling with that. I mean- Yeah, I did. It was-- I was starting to go somewhere, but I s- I still hadn't gotten too far in the bus- Like, I hadn't done a lot of film and TV work yet and so I... You know, when that happened, you know, I had to take, I mean, I think they wanted me to not do anything for six months or so, but it was a, it was at least six months.
And so I, at that time, really had a lot to think about and a lot of stuff that went through my mind. But, I had thought, "Well, maybe this is it for stunts," that, you know, it's gonna be hard to, to physically come back, yes, but to, to mentally come back and to also, like- To come back and try to make myself a name again, like people like known so that you would work and, and be, you know, in the business, that was gonna take a lot of work, you know, too.
So, I kind of thought, well, you know, I kind of had a pretty good run and it was fun, you know. Maybe, something else, will come about. Maybe I'll go back to college or whatever
I had some reevaluating of it at that point. but I also was sort of okay with it. Like, you know, I wasn't, like, "Oh, my world is, is over because I can't do stunts anymore." I was young enough to where I was like, "I'll just find something else to do," you know? And
I was really into, well, science. I took a lot of science classes into science, but, philosophy, theology, a lot of that stuff really intrigued me, you know. And, I was reading, reading, a book, this is way back in, you know, '99, 2000, and I had stumbled across a book in the, bookstore, on quantum physics.
Because even though I'd gone to, college for a couple of years and, and did science classes and, chemistry classes and biology and all of that kind of stuff, hadn't really gotten to any levels where we really talked about quantum physics yet. And man, when I read that book, my mind was blown, dude.
Like, just blown. And So much of the fact that it, like, messed with my reality for a while, honestly In what way? Well, this was, this-- I mean, this was around also the time, the first Matrix had just come out. Oh, wow. Where, reality is a simulation, and it's not real, and basically, that's what this book was saying about reality, is that, you know, the observer effect that basically we are creating this reality and that nothing is actually real until we make the observation and decide it to be real, and that just didn't sit well with me at all at that time.
you know, coming up in a very, you know, Christian, you know, framework of belief that was... Well, it was, ... I mean, it could have almost been seen as like heresy, like almost claiming to be God or something, you know. So yeah, it, it, it kind of, it kind of like t-t-- like, whoa. It was like a little... It was a little much.
And, and I was also, ... You know, I'd also, been interested in Buddhism when I was in Japan, just very curious about it. So, you know, I, I brought a Buddhist book back and was reading that at the same time as this quantum mechanics book, and, it was a real kind of, shift that was happening, but I wasn't ready, I wasn't ready for it yet, really.
I mean, it... The seeds were planted, but then afterwards, I was like, "Ah, that's, that's a little much for me. I'm not quite there yet. I don't know about all this stuff, man." Well, did, did-- Well, did it kinda feel like because of how... And, and it's not just you, it's sort of the human experience. You know what? We come into this world as these little infants.
We come in as the possibility of everything. Like, there is so much wisdom in these infants. But yet an infant isn't acclimated to this world, so we start conditioning and training and, and supporting these infants to exist in this world, right? Then, you know, after years, you know, through our adolescent years and stuff like this, we really kind of, you know, whether it's the truth, your truth, whatever it is, we get sort of conditioned into these ideals.
And then it's like, you know, as you're, in adulthood, not everybody does this, but some people actually realize that growth is still continuing. It still goes beyond all the conditioning you got as a kid. And so, like, it sounds like you kinda got this book, and it was sorta challenging your own reality, and at the same time, the conditioning was, "You know what, Duke?
Maybe you should stay in your lane and don't question this stuff." Is that sorta what it was, the experience? Yeah, it-- Well, it, it opens some questions up that I didn't really have a framework to, answer. It was especially, like, if I had to, like, completely rework my whole worldview and belief system at that time, it was a little more than, I could handle, I guess.
Now, especially discovering all this on your own and not having, like, a, - Not a guru, but like a, you know, a, a, a teacher, somebody to kinda help you process this Like a mentor, a guide, yeah A mentor. A men- yeah, something like that I wanna throw out the caveat. Some mentors mentor people into their belief system.
Other successful or good or, you know, I don't even know, good's subjective, but, empowered mentors help you find your own answers Right. But I didn't really have that. And, my dad was a, like you said, he was a pastor He was a very smart man, too. He knew the Christian theology, like inside and out, pretty much every...
And a lot of arguments against it, of course, too. So he, he knew a lot of the, the answers and that stuff. But I don't think he had really a framework for quantum, because that's just something that wasn't... I mean, it's been around for a while, but it wasn't in mainstream, like, thought processes for many, many years, 'cause nobody knew what the heck w- it was or how it worked or what was going on anyway.
So they just figured out, "Oh, these, these things can work for us and with these calculations, and we can do some stuff, but we don't know why or how it works. We just know it does." I couldn't really go to my dad and be like, "Hey, what, what do you think about quantum physics?" You know? "How does that fit into God and, and everything?"
Right? So, yeah, it was really, it was really in some deep waters that, I was trying to swim around in on my own pretty much. Plus, I wasn't working at the time, so I had, way too much time to think about stuff, which, is kinda what I'm going through now, ironically. Well, you got your shoulder fixed, right?
Yeah, I got my shoulder fixed and, and work has just, slowed down a lot. there's just not as much being filmed here in Georgia anymore. so it's... You know, it doesn't help that I'm getting older either. so I've got all those things to contend against, but, ... And then AI is taking a lot of work away too, so there's all that stuff.
But, so yeah, it was... So I kinda, I guess I just put it on the shelf. it did, it did actually kind of make me go back to my own beliefs and question them and look deeper into them, and it helped strengthen some, and other ones it totally just, like, kinda shook the foundation. So I guess that's kinda good in a way because, I did actually, try to go back into the Christian theology.
but then when I would come across something that really didn't, resonate with me, I kinda had this other, framework now that I could kind of deal with a little bit. And one of the things that just kept really coming into my consciousness was waves Which is very ironic because my wife's name in Japanese means many waves.
But this idea of waves and energy and frequency was really strong, like just kept coming into my consciousness over and over again. I kept thinking about how, well, what if everything is, is really waves? You know, what if, you know, if you get right down to it, we're waves, especially our, our consciousness and our emotions.
What if emotions are just like different frequencies of energy I was starting to see things kind of in that context a little bit more, and being in Japan where it's-- it is, 'cause I, 'cause I go back to the story about doing stunts. I did get called to go back to Japan to do the, the live show that I had done before.
they called out of the blue. I wasn't expecting it, so, this, this was like, "All right, cool. Finally, yeah, something to do. I'm gonna go back to work. I guess stunts aren't done with me yet." so I was excited about that to, to get back into it again and to go back to Japan. I really liked, really liked Japan.
And plus my girlfriend was over there, so I did get to go back to Japan. I was excited about stunts, but I was, I was nervous getting back into it. I was, like you said, a high fall specialist. I was the guy in the live show that always got killed at the end of the show and fell off the building. I had to go back into that role and, train, you know, to do the high falls again.
And when I st- was standing up on the edge of the building and I'm looking down, you know, at the, at the fall, which, but, you know, in the live show it's not super high. It's, 28 feet or something like that. 28 feet's still pretty damn high. Yeah, well, it looks, it looks pretty high when you're standing up there too.
like from down below and looking up, but once you're up there, it's a different story. But, you know, we have to fall into fake breakaway wood slats and then into a, porta pit, which is a soft kind of foam pit that was buried, floor level. So to the audience level, it looks like you fall off the building, crash through this wood, and then hit the ground.
So, you know, it's not like some big fluffy high bag or, airbag that you're looking at, you know? You're looking at all these things that you gotta fall through, and you gotta land correctly. You gotta land flat, and you gotta land, in the right space because you can easily go off to, to the right or left or short or long, and then you're, you're not hitting your pad anymore.
You're off your pad 'cause the pad wasn't huge. And yeah, man, I was up there and, I was nervous, man, 'cause I wasn't expecting how much I was like... The fear, like, oh, I could get hurt doing this. It's like a trauma response. I had to overcome that and, get-- to get back into it again and- So what was it that helped you overcome that?
Well, really a big part of it is knowing that I had the ability because I had done it so many times before. It wasn't just like getting up and trying something brand new hoping it works out good. You know? Like, I had trained in high falls. I had the training, and I knew I had the ability and, and that if I trust my body and my instincts, then, I'd be okay.
So I had that Level of confidence. And I also believed like, like you said, you don't believe in luck. So I believe that, that God, people wanna say universe or however describe the, you know, ultimate intelligence, had gotten me back to Japan for a purpose, and it wasn't for me to die doing this high fall.
And so I kind of just recognized that I was there for a reason now, and I also was a lot more grateful for my health, my body, the fact that I can do this, the fact that I can work in this field and, you know, be in Japan and make this money. So there was kind of that renewed sense of, gratitude there. I think with all of them together, it was just...
then, then it just comes down to, like just taking a deep breath and going for it. I mean, it just, it always comes down to you've, you've just gotta step off and go for it at some point. Thank you for going into that explanation 'cause that's huge. I mean, there's a lot of people, there may be some people that are listening that, you know, you went through a traumatic experience.
Whether we know it or not, we're all trauma... I mean, human living is a traumatic experience. Yeah, it is. And we all have, resi- residual and scars and all this kind of stuff that we carry around, and a lot of times we don't see those things in people. We don't see what they're dealing with. And so, you know, and now the na-- day and-- in today's day and age, the terminology now is trauma response.
Well, yeah, you had a... You know, you're up there for the first time. You've been flown back to Japan. You have this kind of reality, and it, it hits you, and it's like it, it could debilitate you. Like, some people literally become debilitated. They, they can't do it. They back out, whatever the case is. But that's one thing that I wanted to highlight is even though you had the trauma, it sounds like your, your awareness, your self-awareness, your recognition of your ability before, your recognition of being in gratitude, like there were so many levels and layers of awareness that you were able to tap into instead of just focus on the, the response, the, the debilitating response.
You focused on things that actually could, could get you there You know, and it's amazing 'cause a lot of times people wanna-- they look for what's the Band-Aid, what's the fix? There's something that's gonna fix this, and it's like what you did was you actually processed yourself through the PTSD or whatever, whatever the, the response was.
You processed yourself by valuing who you were, who you had been, what you're there to do, and you leaned into, you said it, trust, which I also link trust as faith in self. You know, when we have faith in our ability, when we have faith in ourself. 'Cause, I mean, the reality is, is none of us are getting out of this life alive.
We're not. You know? I mean, we all have expiration dates. Yep. But not to be cliché, but it's like what's the kind of life that you're living while you're still here? You know? And when you are confronted with these debilitating moments, are you giving yourself the space, the grace to even honor who you are and who you have been?
And you happen to be in that moment where you were able to push through. Now, some situations, some people may not be able to get over the hump at that time, but it doesn't have to be a lifelong sentence. It doesn't have to be. But for you, the fact that you confronted this and were so genuine in the moment, you were present.
You brought power to that situation, and I'm sharing this so that the listener gets really clear that if you're dealing with something in your life, if you're dealing with something in your world that's, that's hobbling you or holding you back, recognize are you giving your energy to what's holding you back or are you, are you opening yourself up to other energy, other values that you're bringing to the situation?
Because once we start to open ourselves up, like what you started to do was you opened yourself up to be able to, to do it 'cause, you know, like you said, you're dealing with, with specific-- I fall off this high fall if I push too far, just a little bit too far to the right, I'm gonna h- I'm gonna hit and injure myself a little too far to the left.
There's, there's precision there. So what you actually did to work yourself through that process was really about honoring the essence of who you are and the gift that you are, and that's something that other people, I think, can benefit from 'cause there are people out there dealing with stuff in their world where they're caught up in the response and all their focus and all their energy gets stuck on the response rather than on who they are.
And, you know, sometimes it g- it's good to have a, a pressure too. Like, 'cause sometimes we get stuck and You know, like when I was standing up on that roof and I'm in Japan and I'm looking down and, you know, the fear's coming, the doubt, everything. But then, you know, remembering, yes, I can do this. I've done it many, many times before.
I know how to do this. and it... You know, I wouldn't be back here just to hurt myself. There's a reason. All this kind of stuff. Still also, I knew that, I had to do it, you know, 'cause... Well, I guess I didn't have to. I could have said, "Oh, screw this. Fly me back to America. I'm out of here." I mean, I could have.
there was that out, but for me, that, that was never really an option, like just giving in and giving up, you know, and quitting. So I had to do it. That was, I'm there, I'm getting paid. This is my job. I'm expected to do this. I can do this. And you faced the discomfort. I mean, that's one thing that really is, is a key element here.
It was uncomfortable, and yet you faced it. And if you think about it, how else do we grow as human beings? I mean, I'm not telling you go out and make your life hard so you grow yourself, but the aspect is- It won't be getting hard for you. You don't have to worry about that ... is if you're gonna build muscle, you gotta tear it down.
If you're gonna build, you know, you're gonna sweat it. You're, you know, any growth that you're gonna do, well, I won't say any growth, but a large part of the growth that any person does is through some form of discomfort. And a lot of people are hobbled in today's age where, and h- and, and it's a subtle hobble.
It, it, it, it traps them and they don't know it, but it's like, "I don't wanna be uncomfortable." Right? There's an entitlement of not, entitlement of comfort, like I expect to be comfortable. And it's like, and believe me, I'll tell you, I'll raise my hand and be the first one in line saying, "I don't like to be uncomfortable either, but I also don't like to be frozen in time."
Yeah. It's a hard, it's a hard path to walk because, and I find as I get older, part of me wants the comfort so bad. Like part of me really wants to just be comfortable. And then, you know, that part of me that was always kind of pushing and kind of driving myself and pushing and... It's, it's still there, but
It doesn't move me as much now because I've already done things. I've already tried so many things and accomplished some things and failed so many things. So, I'm like, yeah, you know, I've already kind of experienced that, so, you know, why do I wanna keep trying to push myself? And-- But then the comfort is so uncomfortable.
I don't know how else to put it. It's like sitting there in comfort with no stress, nothing driving, nothing pushing, nothing to get you moving is also uncomfortable. And for me at least, like it's, it's not, it's not a fun way to live, you know? Okay, yeah, I'm comfortable, but I'm just not doing anything either.
So you're, you're bringing an awareness. I love what you're bringing because you're bringing this awareness and it takes me to a place and some people are-- I'm, I'm not here to, to offend anybody. I'm really not. But it takes me to a place where I think maybe this is why old people get crotchety. Oh, definitely, man.
Because they get comfortable. They don't wanna be uncomfortable, and yet in the status quo that they live in, it's uncomfortable because they don't really live in a life that they're- Right. There's always this, this low-level anxiety that's like, "I should be doing something. This isn't-- I shouldn't just be sitting here.
I need to be doing something." And then there's like, well, there's things that I wanna do and I wanna experience, but I know it's gonna take so much effort to get there. and then you feel bad because you don't put the effort in. So you're just constantly arguing with your-- spending all this energy just arguing with yourself and this resistance of, you know, doing, moving, trying, growing.
And yeah, sitting still is
It comes at a cost Yeah, it comes at a cost. It comes at a cost. And it's interesting because like in so many spiritual traditions, we're taught to, be able to sit still and in the silence and be okay with the stillness I mean, I struggle with that. It's definitely hard. when I've actually been able to get to that sweet spot, it's amazing.
But it's, it's different-- It's, very different than, like, just not doing anything in life. You know what I mean? Like, this stillness that you get from a meditation actually inspires you to move, to, to do something and not just sit around. But see, yeah. But see, I would also say I love what you're bringing.
What I'd also say is this: when you are intentionally sitting, you are doing something. Y- It's not that you're not doing anything. Like, when you're sitting veg- veged, veged out in front of the TV for days on end, not just a couple hours. I mean, maybe you escape a couple hours here and there, fine. But when you're, like, days on end and your weekends evaporated, whatever, that's...
Unless that's your intention, odds are... A- and some people might be vital in that. You know, not everybody's the same. But we do live in a culture that has groomed us, that has conditioned us, that has programmed us to be like, "If you aren't doing something, then you're doing something wrong." Right? Gotta, gotta go.
Better get it done. You're not doing enough. You should always do more. And it's like, to get people to even slow down and appreciate who they are for themselves, becomes its own battle. And so for me, I, I sit there and I think about-- When I'm thinking about older folks who I mentioned get crotchety, it's kinda like they lost that youthful contact with thems- their inner self of like, I remember when I used to play, like when I used to go for-- go to the park or go, for a bike ride.
Just to go for a bike ride, not to, "I'm gonna do a ten K. I'm gonna do a, you know, hundred-mile ride. I'm gonna do," you know. It's like, great, you got all this stuff to go do. That's great. That's wonderful. But what about just being in the experience? What about just being with that inner child that helps you not be so judgy 'cause you're crotchety and old or whatever?
And crotchety and old could be-- I know people in their thirties that are crotchety and old. I know people in their nineties who are so full of life. But you know who I'm talking about, the listener out there, when you think about, wow, this person used to be so much more lively, now they're not, and it's sad, and they're-- they, they don't seem to enjoy their life much.
Yeah. I got a grandpa who's gonna be one hundred in September. Oh, wow. He can get a little crotchety and complaining, but for the most part, he's a very positive human being. And, I think that's probably big reason why he's been able to make it to, you know, 100 years old because, yeah, he's, he is, he's, he's positive and he's, he likes, he likes to, to play, you know, even now.
I mean, he still enjoys goofing off and being silly and doing stuff like that. So I think that's a- It keeps your spirit young, you know? Yeah. Plus, he still has quite a bit of his cognition still, doesn't he? Correct? He does, yeah. I just talked to him two days ago on the phone actually, and, yeah, he-- it's amazing.
He is, he, he, he will kinda get lost a little bit in what he's saying sometimes. but for the most part, he's very sharp. Yeah. Nice. For, for 100 years old. Yeah. That's amazing.
We have a number of friends, we, we belong to a movie group, and there's the ages from probably 92, 93 years old to, you know, mid-50s as far as this collective group. And to see the dynamic of all the different life expressions, soul expressions, you know, between the-- It's just, it's such... They're such a gift.
They're such a blessing to, to engage with, you know. And, and some of these folks I w- I wouldn't have had been able to ever meet had it not been through my in-laws and this movie group that they put together. And to be so connected with, you know, a number of the members that, you know, we talk philosophy and, and the youthfulness that some of them really bring, it's, it's just inspiring so.
That's cool, man. So what do you guys do? You watch movies and talk about them? Yeah, we call it... Well, back before COVID, whenever we were-- My mother-in-law would always do it every Friday. They would offer up to a group of people to meet up at a theater. They'd go watch whatever show was picked, and then they would discuss it afterwards.
Some people may have liked it, some people may not. Some people, you know, may have gotten a different perspective after talking about it afterwards. That's cool. But then COVID happened, and we took it online, and it's been online ever since. And, I mean, we have up to, I mean, I think as much... One, one week, we had like 26 people online.
Wow! Some of th- some of them are couples, some of them are individuals. But it's sort of like a boo- a book group that talks about movies, and not everybody likes the movies. But the one thing I think that I hear most, I've said this, my wife said this, a lot of people have said this, is, we've watched a number of movies that we probably never would have watched had it not been for this group and someone recommended.
Because, you know, you watch some of the mainstream ones, but you also watch Maybe some documentaries, you watch some that are, are, are docudramas, you watch some that are, are form My wife's Japanese, and her friends are Japanese, so every once in a while there's a, a film made in Japan that comes out in, in America here, and it's, it's so good that they, they release it in America not too often.
But this one was just a few months ago. I can't... I wish I could remember the name of it, but it was about, the, the guys who perform in the, kabuki, which is the, you know, the plays, that they do in Japan, the traditional ones. And, you know, they wouldn't allow women in those. So all of the women parts were played by men.
So this was about these, this... basically this one main character who was basically brought up under a very famous kabuki guy, and then he had his own son, and then these two guys are about the same age, and it's their story as they, you know, as they climb up through the, the ranks of, of kabuki. But, I would have n- pr- you know, if my wife wasn't Japanese, I'll be honest with you, I probably would have never stepped foot in that theater.
It just was like, "Eh, it doesn't really sound, like, interesting." Dude, that was such a good movie. You find, you find these little gems that you don't, you don't think about, and you're like, "Oh, wow." It was amazing. The acting, the cinematography, the story. Like, I think I cried... I don't know how many times I cried watching that movie.
It was, like, amazing. I'm like Yeah. So yeah, I know what you mean. There's some, some really good ones that you would've probably never picked out on your own, and then you're watching, you're like, "Wow, that is so... That was so amazing." Wow. That's awesome. Well, brother, I'm gonna have to have you on another show, and maybe even another show.
We'll just do these episodes every so often if you're up for it and- Yeah ... talk about philosophy, otherwise our, our listeners will be like going, "When the hell does this damn thing end?" But It went long. I'm thinking about the listeners. You know, I know it's longer than a lot of podcasts, but, I still try to keep it somewhat manageable.
I hope that you... I wanna thank you first, though, Duke. Thank you very much for not only coming on the show today, but being so genuine a- and sharing a lot of original human experience that you have shared. It was my pleasure. Thank you so much for having me, brother. Absolutely. I mean, I'd love to come back on, and yeah, next time, let's, let's go deep.
Oh, we'll keep going deep. I mean, we, we touched on some deep stuff today. We did. Yeah, no, we did. We'll just keep, we'll just keep going deeper. We'll keep exploring because that's really what it's about. and so for the listeners out there, I just wanna thank you very much for, for dropping in. We hope you got something out of the show, somewhere along the way.
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