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Rise Above: a podcast from Rogers Behavioral Health takes listeners on a journey of education and inspiration as we sit down with mental health and addiction experts and past patients who are changing how the world views mental health and addiction.
You know, it the the they were diseases, unfortunately. And when someone maybe used to see my picture on the website as an alderman, they didn't know some of what, you know, I may have been dealing with in my head and my heart.
Andy:You're listening to Rise Above, a Rogers behavioral health podcast where we sit down with Rogers experts who are changing the way the world views health and addiction. Hi, listener. Thank you again for pushing the little play button on Rise Above, a podcast from Rogers Behavioral Health. Today is certainly an interesting episode. I have with me, a former patient from Rogers.
Andy:His name is Aaron. Some things to know about him. He was a former alderman. He was actually an alderman in the city I live in, and I remember at the time, his story, his struggle with substance use, was making front page news here. And, and his political aspirations in the area fizzled out because of it.
Andy:And if he hadn't reached out and wanted to share his story, quite honestly, I would have thought that's where his story ended. But as it turned out, that's really kinda where his story begins. So with me today to talk more about it is Aaron. Aaron, thank you so much for joining me.
Aaron:Absolutely.
Andy:So let's just start with first off, what led you to Rogers?
Aaron:Well, when I when I lived in the Wisconsin area, that's when I first really developed and discovered that, you know, drinking alcohol for me was problematic. It was causing problems in my life and really the kind of the the standard place, you know, in that area, in my opinion, still to go to is Rogers. And that was recommended from a counselor of mine. Rogers seemed seemed to be a no brainer and really began my treatment experience, which, you know, led me, you know, to repeating treatment in some fashion 11 times. But part of the reason why, you know, I look at 11 times now as more of a a badge of honor rather than something of shame because of it's evidence that I just refused to quit when I put my mind to something.
Aaron:And, you know, having that original experience, good experience in treatment, now as a, you know, a certified ear recovery specialist, I see the apprehension in people, and I'm able to to relay that experience to them that, you know, it it is scary the first time, but having somebody and mainly the right facility then to embark that, you know, journey so that, you know, the second time when you need to go back or the third time or the fourth time or the eleventh time
Andy:Right.
Aaron:That you do go back, you don't give up. And so that that initial experience was was very important for me.
Andy:So you said I think you used the term problematic. Just go back your relationship with alcohol to start with. I mean, when did when did you think it was a problem? When did it really become a problem?
Aaron:Yeah. I get that question a lot because I'm I'm the only person in my family who's had, you know, who's had alcohol cause problems. You know, and that's that's words that we use, but, you know, I I do use the word alcoholic. I am an alcoholic and, you know, I do admit I'm powerless over alcohol and, yeah, causing problems, you know. So I didn't really grow up with it necessarily in my DNA.
Aaron:I didn't grow up with it around the house. I didn't grow up with an alcoholic mother or father or brother or grandparent or aunt or uncle or anyone. So for me, it was, I would say, much more kind of culturally. You know, as we're well aware, Wisconsin has a drinking culture, and that became very normalized for me where it wasn't really normal maybe for a lot of the air other areas of the country and certainly areas of the country that I had lived in before. So it was new to me and, you know, just just the general kind of being young and enjoying life, but then having as oftentimes do people in their thirties is when you're not really that mature yet, but real life is hitting.
Aaron:You're having kids. You're buying houses. Bills are hitting. You know, you've you've gotten married and you're navigating that relationship, which which, you know, for me and and my wife at the time, we both battled the same battle with alcohol. And so having that in the house, you know, could can cause a lot of problems.
Aaron:And so that did really just escalated over time and became then more of a physical addiction, and then it kind of identified a few other problems that addiction had created, which was some anxiety, certainly some depression. But one thing I will say that, you know, going through this process that's been a blessing is to actually identify that I'm also bipolar. And so the reason I say that's a blessing is because when it's, I think, managed well, it can become, you know, kind of a, you know, the they say, you know, kind of a superpower that it it certainly can be when when managed correctly. And for me, that began with getting rid of alcohol for my life and then continuing the counseling, you know, consulting with doctors, mental health doctors, you know, it's it's a process. There's a lot to it.
Aaron:But thankfully, yeah, I've gotten to a point to where not only is that no longer a scratch of mine, but I view it as as an asset.
Andy:So you said you went through treatment 11 times. Did you leave every time feeling like you you got this? Or did you leave sometimes thinking this isn't working for me?
Aaron:I left each I I I can say, you know, based upon my actions right after, I can say 10 of those 11 times, I left with the intention of I'm gonna, you know, go grab life by the you know what and, you know, go do this. And and there was one time I did walk directly from there and relapsed immediately. And so that that wasn't Rogers. That was a different treatment facility. You know?
Aaron:And and I because I did have some successes, and I had varied experiences in in treatment, you know. So, you know, doing it 11 times, I didn't go to Rogers eleven times. Rogers was five of the 11. But, yeah, it was kind of a lot of the kind of the old school, what I call the ejection seat into real life. It's you you've been drinking for twenty five years, but after twenty five days of insurance coverage, we're gonna kick you to the real world and say, you know, let's go figure this out with all the temptation that was there before.
Aaron:Mhmm. And so, you know, that's very difficult, I think, for people nowadays. And so I feel very extremely grateful for anyone who's helped me get to this chair which I'm sitting in there right
Andy:now. So can I ask you I mean, 11 times five at Rogers, but you've told me you credit Rogers as the difference maker? What was different about the Rogers experience from the other experiences?
Aaron:It's easy and it's in part why I work in the the recovery field was the the ability for the people in, you know, seeing us at our worst and us knowing we're at our worst. To see the people have, like, the kind of just kindness and empathy, like, that I've never seen something run quite that deep before in that setting. And and really to see that impact from people who were, you know, huffing cans to someone who may, you know, kind of slightly have a drinking problem. That that wasn't me, but there's there's
Andy:other think you slightly had a drinking problem or did you think I mean, I guess going in the first time, you'd hit a rock bottom?
Aaron:Yeah. There I mean, of course, there are different versions of rock bottoms Right. That people have. And, you know, I had those experiences. They they now thankfully served me as they didn't, you know, end my life.
Aaron:But I it was for me, a lot of it became medical. So, like, seeing an actual medical doctor and say, you know, if you don't do this, this is going to happen. You know, if you don't stop doing this, this is going to happen. And so then it was like, okay. How do I I want I want to do this.
Aaron:How do I stop doing it? You know? So with Rogers, I did I did IOP, and I did inpatient. So I did I actually did inpatient at Economowoc. That was my really my main my main one.
Aaron:That was during probably my lowest time, both from a both from a depression standpoint and from a bipolar and substance use. You know, it's not a story I've shared with a lot of people, but to kinda give some perspective of, you know, what how Roger stepped up and and also the severity of of some of this that, you know, it that they were diseases, unfortunately, and diseases that brought me you know, I would take off. I was the bipolar guy that would kind of disappear every now and then, and I did one time to Missouri where my family is from. Yeah. I got about twelve hours away.
Aaron:I told my family I was in Michigan. So they they were looking for me there. And I had I had traveled there to spend the weekend doing I'm lord knows what. But at the end of the weekend, I was, you know, gonna leave this earth. That was my plan.
Aaron:And at the last minute, I did make one last phone call. Thank god someone picked up, and thank god I had two friends who drove down and caught me. And yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Aaron:So it was yeah. At the end of that that weekend, I had two friends. And, thankfully, my my parents knew someone who was affiliated with Rogers and and was able to kind of soft hand off to admissions there for all the reasons that I needed it at that time, which was which was all three of those categories, depression, bipolar, and substance use. And and I still have those workbooks. Mhmm.
Aaron:You know? And I still use them, actually, with when I leave meetings and I'm kinda needing, like, a really good topic just because that was a pretty impactful time as you might imagine. Yeah. And I was there I was there at inpatient at a Conwalk for eleven days, which is kind of a longer stay. But, yeah, learned that that's where I learned a lot about meditation.
Aaron:And so, yeah, there's just been a lot of good things happened since kinda walking through those doors.
Andy:And we will be right back. Real quick, I wanted to take a moment to talk to you about WISE, the initiative for stigma elimination. It unites people across the nation to support those touched by mental illness and addiction. The compassionate approach champions personal stories and powerful connections, fostering healing by reducing stigma through evidence based practices. Rogers Behavioral Health supports the work of WISE through their community learning and engagement department.
Andy:WISE collaborates with a diverse network of organizations and individuals united in the fight against stigma. You can learn more about WISE, explore their four key programs, and connect with them by visiting the website www.eliminatestigma.org. And now back to the interview. One thing that we haven't mentioned yet, well, you just mentioned it a little bit, but you you were an alderman when this all I don't wanna say began, but when you started going into treatment and things like that, there's certainly a story behind that. Right?
Aaron:Yeah. I would say as the timeline goes with, like, my substance use and struggles with my political career there as an alderman, you know, like like anything else, began great. Began where, you know, drinking was not a problem. Right. It and so, you know, when I was first elected in in 2013, And I I can say at least for the first couple of terms, was you know, I would have a rule, and a a lot of other aldermen have the same rule, which is when when we go out and socialize either together, we always of course, there's rules we would have to follow.
Aaron:But I would always have the two drink rule. No more than two drinks. That way that way, you know, no no great story starts with politician drinks 13 beers. You know?
Andy:Yeah.
Aaron:So that that's what that was the more accurate representation of the beginning part. The latter part definitely, I would say mentally was difficult. My substance use did increase as well, And that I attribute to, again, I think, really just culture, some personal choices, as well as honestly, again, kinda navigating the thirties, and you throw in three children and a marriage that was struggling, and you throw politics into the mix, and our political climate has not gotten any simpler. And I was in it during the thick of it. And, yeah, that so that's that's been a journey.
Aaron:But, again, now looking back on that experience, it's serving me even though it kinda I kinda view it for a long time. I viewed it at it like it kinda scarred me, but it's made me tougher. That's for sure.
Andy:I would say your struggles were kind of in the limelight in a way.
Aaron:Yeah. Yeah. There's there's one thing when, you know, when somebody has a a misstep or a or a big screw up, you know, either one. It's always it's never made easier when it's on the front page of the paper.
Andy:Right.
Aaron:You know? Or you get a notification on your phone and it's a notification about you. You know? Those are those are things those are things that really play with your head that I found I found tons of peace in a tiny town in Minnesota and going to AA meetings and, you know, and really just getting into community and yeah. I found a lot of peace in in that in that quiet.
Andy:I would say a change of scenery and then surrounding yourself with the right people is important.
Aaron:Yeah. Yeah. For sure.
Andy:So speaking of which, your recovery now, where are you at? What's, you know, what's airing up to?
Aaron:Yeah. In in January, I celebrated three years, so that's been been amazing. And, you know, I I continue counseling. I've since I work full time now in the recovery field as a certified peer recovery specialist. So I'm really doing and and actually using my political experience to help grow the role here in the state of Minnesota and hopefully even beyond that.
Aaron:And then really what helped me, you know, really get this recovery thing to finally stick was the community aspect. And that, of course, kinda coincides with, the peer programs and a lot of what treatment centers are now, kind of adapting more to and what state laws are enabling more. But I managed to be very blessed to find, you know, a person, who's also in recovery that, her and I are you know, we've been together sixteen months now. We have tons of things in common and tons tons of things not in common. One of them being that she lives a thousand miles away.
Aaron:So that's been that's been a new challenge, but we've also her and I have begun a a a start up business. That's a a community that is a peer support for alcohol that's virtual. So we have members in San Diego, in Texas, in New York, in Atlanta, and kind of really all over the place. And so that's been great for my personal recovery to get into a leadership role, which I'm I'm comfortable in those shoes.
Andy:Sure.
Aaron:Yeah. But also, I'm then tasked with three times a week coming up with what to talk about and how to incorporate recovery into the individual lives of all of our members. And I can't think of a thing more helpful for my own personal recovery than to than to do that. So that's been a huge strength of mine. And and as well as, you know, I've had some things go right for me.
Aaron:And, you know, my my children, they're doing great. They're healthy. My parents are very supportive. Again, my my girlfriend's amazing and everyone and everyone who's been around me has been very supportive. And I've I've had where, you know, anywhere from some people waiting, you know, waiting for me to call them and, you know, reach out.
Aaron:And I've had other people who've gotten my calls and and been surprised because they didn't know I was still alive. So, yeah, no dull moments in in recovery. That's for sure. Not the way I do it anyway.
Andy:Sure. So what would you tell someone who is considering getting help? They feel like they've got a problem. They know they've got a problem. What would you say to them?
Aaron:Well, here's the positive part. Every day going forward, there's more resources available to help than there was the day before. And so one, there's literally no better day than the present, and there's a lot of resources out there. And it's really astonishing how recovery is just is set aside from a human aspect so much that it doesn't matter what, you know, who you worship, who you voted for, you know, what culture you are, what, you know, what religion, it it doesn't matter. That not only does it affect us all, but recovery affects us all as well.
Aaron:And in whatever shape or form, however big or small, that brings a person happiness because that that imprisonment of the mind of to a substance, and I've expressed this with clients and with the membership or recovery unbroken, it's worse than having the physical barrier. Going through, you know, the the being imprisoned to addiction is worse than actually being imprisoned. And so I'd I wouldn't tell anyone that their suffering is less than, and so don't wait don't wait to find the actual jail to go get help. You know, you're you we're already trapped. It's time to it's time to get help.
Andy:And then also just if you've already found the actual jail, it's still not too late for you.
Aaron:Well yeah. You know? And and to me, I I believe, again, those experiences now are absolute assets of mine. It was extremely hard. Yes.
Aaron:But, again, you know, I just spent a couple of days in Orlando riding roller coasters, and that feeling would not have been the same had I not gone through what I did in jail. And I know that because I've had that same experience, you know, kind of numbed out from drinking, and it's still fun, but it it didn't hold a candle for what I just experienced.
Andy:Well, what else would you what would you tell the someone who's sober? They're they're they're on their way. They're a couple months in. Advice for them?
Aaron:Yeah. Understand that, you know, there's there's beauty in the maintenance of this and not just the beginning part. Talk about roller coasters. There's gonna be ups and ups and downs and twists and turns.
Andy:Way to bring that back.
Aaron:Yeah. But, you know, the the nice thing is is at the end of it, you do get to see a really cool looking picture of yourself hopefully having, you know, having fun. But, yeah, there's beauty in the maintenance of it. Like, year one, year two, year three. I know I've heard a lot of people say, oh, year two is difficult, and they or I to me, every year has gotten easier.
Aaron:Every year has gotten better, and it's because you don't recovery is not just about the first six months or the or the first nine months or just mitigating the damage that people have done. It's you know, our our decisions in the past are just they're not gonna go anywhere. They're gonna sit in the past. But I think in recovery, if you focus on the future and knowing that tomorrow is gonna be the, you know, the next best version of yourself, Compete with you and no one else and, you know, worry about how you feel about yourself and not about how someone else feels. And when we start to do that, we start to dismantle the stigma because stigma is still killing people.
Aaron:And, you know, if there's one thing I'd I will share, I think that's the unfortunate difference between my ex wife and myself is she never was put in the position or had the opportunity to, I think, properly ask for help, and it's it's that difficult in fear of being judged as to where I was kind of just put in the middle of it. Not really necessarily by choice, but once I was there, you're there. And I think, you know, that treatment, of course, that I received and that caring and that empathy that started with Rogers and now continues with everyone around me, I think that's the you know, when I tell someone who's, you know, two months sober, stick with it because the that's the difference. Can be the difference. And it's not just life or death.
Aaron:We need to not view it through that lens always. It's what kind of life do you wanna live? Like, stop stop living the life that addiction's picking for you. I'm living the life I'm choosing now, and it's yeah. Could not be better.
Andy:Aaron, thank you so much for your time, man. I really appreciate it.
Aaron:Yeah.
Andy:Well, listener, that is a wrap for today's episode. I wanted to thank Aaron for joining me. His journey of resilience and recovery after 11:11 going through treatment 11 times, nothing short of inspiring. You know? If you're out there, if you were listening, if you're struggling, if you know someone who's struggling, I mean, he's living proof that it's never too late to make a change, and your setbacks don't define your future.
Andy:So thanks again for listening, and, be sure to like and subscribe to be notified of new episodes. If you think you know someone who needs to hear this episode, send it along to them. And as always, if you or someone you care about is struggling with a mental health or substance use disorder, visit rogersbh.org for a free mental health screening. See you next time.