Healthy Happy Wise Wealthy

🎙️ Welcome to Healthy Happy Wise Wealthy (HHWW)! In this profound and challenging episode, host Mary Meyer sits down with Dr. Davina Longshore of the Cummings Foundation for Behavioral Health to dive deep into topics shaping communities today. Recorded on Juneteenth, this conversation is a heartfelt exploration of bias, behavioral health, community trauma, and the steps we can all take to create more healing, unity, and understanding in our world. Dr. Longshore shares her expertise working with first responders, her upcoming projects tackling intimate partner violence and gun culture, and offers candid advice on confronting our own biases—plus real-world tips for building bridges across communities.
🌟 Topics Covered:
  • The link between physical and behavioral health
  • The impact of emotional trauma on illness
  • Maslow’s hierarchy of needs as a framework for well-being
  • The Cummings Foundation’s mission and upcoming initiatives
  • Addressing intimate partner violence and gun violence in America
  • Bias, racism, and the importance of integration and diversity
  • How to have uncomfortable conversations and break down social barriers
  • Tangible steps to build healthier, less divided communities
Key takeaways:
  • Behavioral and physical health are deeply connected: Emotional well-being is a powerful determinant of physical health outcomes.
  • Prevention is key: Dr. Longshore’s model focuses on addressing psychological needs before they manifest as mental health disorders.
  • Breaking social barriers is everyone’s job: Healing begins when we connect authentically with those outside our own backgrounds.
  • Bias awareness is essential: We all carry biases—recognizing them is the first step to change.
  • Diversity fuels growth and compassion: Integrating with people of different backgrounds enriches our own lives and communities.
Some questions I ask:
  • How does physical health play into behavioral health?
  • What does your preventative model for well-being look like in practice?
  • What’s next for the Cummings Foundation for Behavioral Health?
  • How are you tackling issues like intimate partner violence and gun culture?
  • How can we move beyond our own biases and start meaningful conversations?
  • What is the significance of Juneteenth to you?
  • How do we move toward true merit-based opportunities?
  • What action steps can our listeners take today to build bridges in their own communities?
Learn more about our guest:
Resources List:
YouTube Chapters: 00:00 Welcome & Episode Introduction
01:19 Understanding Behavioral Health
04:22 Emotional Trauma and Physical Illness
07:10 Dr. Longshore’s Preventative Model
10:02 Cummings Foundation’s Mission & Projects
14:27 Addressing Bias, Racism & Integration
24:56 Breaking Down Communication Barriers
34:05 Moving Towards Community Healing
38:22 Final Words and Call to Action

Don't miss out on this heartfelt and inspiring conversation about breaking down bias, healing trauma, and taking action for a healthier, happier, and more united world. Subscribe for more episodes and be part of the movement for change!
🌟 Connect on Instagram and Facebook @HealthyHappyWiseWealthy
Want to nominate a guest or suggest a topic? Visit healthyhappywisewealthy.com
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#HealthyHappyWiseWealthyPodcast 

Creators and Guests

MM
Producer
Mary Meyer

What is Healthy Happy Wise Wealthy?

We cover topics on healing, health, happiness, growing wealth and living wise in a world that often sabotages you.

Welcome

to Healthy, Happy, Wise, Wealthy, the podcast where we take people who

have lived through some fire and now want to take that light and help

guide others. I am your host, Mary Meyer. I'm so glad you're here.

I want you to step away from today feeling like you

know some things about how to heal, about how to move

forward, about how to create the life that you want to live.

Let's get started. Welcome Back to part two with Dr. Davena

Longshore with the Cummings Foundation for Behavioral Health. I'm excited

for this episode. We're going to talk about biases and how we all

have them. Doesn't matter your, your gender, your age, your

religion, your political affiliation, your skin color. And we are going to

talk about how we can all come together to make our world a better place.

We actually recorded this on Juneteenth even though you all are listening to it

for the first time in July. These conversations are

that can be good for everyone. Everyone is invited to this table.

Welcome and let's get started. I want to just put a

short call to action because if you have, if you'd

like to see programs in your area, in your

precinct, with your police officers, you can email

you about that. And also if you want to donate

towards this because this is a thing that brings a lot of

healing and health and safety to the community and to

the country, you can also donate also,

which is Cummings C U M M I N G

and S S on the end of it and then c

f b h.org

CummingsCFBH..org so I just want to throw

that in there in case someone's listening. That's the way to do it. So

what, tell me how, how does physical health play, play into

behavioral health? Because behavioral health is maybe a word people

aren't as familiar with, but my understanding is kind of a mix

between mental and physical.

So yes, the, the mental, the mind and

the body are connected to each other. So your

emotions that you experience

throughout the day, I'll just use this as an example. They cause you to produce

certain hormones. Your brain produces those hormones. We

know from a basic biology class that the brain is the

powerhouse of the body, right? It is making sure that every

organ system is running. So if the brain

is malfunctioning and not producing the chemical

signals that it needs to produce for your other organ systems

to run properly, then it will cause health issues.

So things like depression are linked to heart

attack, stroke, cancer, metabolic

diseases, diabetes. And people

don't realize it because we've been Taught

go get a physical exam or. And that's

even. Not even to be proactive. Our society is a little.

We act after the fact that, you know, like, let me go get an exam

because my stomach hurts. Instead of being preventative,

but taking care of your mind, your

emotions and the impact that they have on the

brain is also preventative because you can work out

all the time. You can be a bodybuilder, you can eat

vegan or vegetarian, but if you're

hurting emotionally, you will still

get physically ill. Yeah. Yes.

And I've. I've had some guests on the, the show that their, their episodes

are coming out in the next couple weeks. And as an example, both of them

talked about breath work. Right. And. And one of them

yoga, too. So. And those are things I think you've talked about in terms

of like, helping people regulate. Yes. Incorporating those

also. So kind of the whole, the whole gamut. I know

this. The. The stuff you're coming up with, you're not. It's

not, it's not myopic. It's just, it's very.

Feels like you're covering all the bases.

Yes. So what I can say about my model is

it's based on some of our basic

psychological tenants of what humans need to

survive and to be happy. And so in those

models, things like Maslow's hierarchy of needs,

they explain that humans

need things emotionally and physically to

be happy, to thrive, to do their best in life.

So you need to feel like you belong. You need to have food,

you need to have shelter, you need to have security, you need

to have interactions with others. Humans are social

beings. We need each other.

Which also is not a huge thing that's popular right

now. Right. You know, everything's about, I can do

it myself, Right? Not really. Not really.

We're not designed that way. We're social beings, so we need each other.

So the model I created is built off of

all the things that psychology has found out years

ago that humans need to thrive in life. And

then what I did was I looked at those and looked at their connections

between mental disorder, and they're all

connected to depression, anxiety,

personality disorders, schizophrenia.

They're all connected. So I looked at the connections and I

designed a program that's preventative. It

offers interventions that feed those areas

of you that are in need so you never get to the place

of depression or anxiety or a

psychotic disorder. And yes,

believe me, genetics plays a role, but

we know that human behavior is so complex, and it's

a complex interplay between our genetics and our

physical environment. And so what I do is what I can

do. I can't determine who you were born from, but

we can look at your environment, the behaviors,

the things that you're getting and that you're not getting,

and we can play with those things and maneuver those things

so that you don't set off that gene. And

that's linked to depression. Yeah,

that's so powerful. So

what's next for the Cummings foundation for Behavioral Health

and for you, Dr. Longshore, what is kind of like the next

steps of what you're looking to do with the work you're

doing? So with this particular project,

the next steps is we're looking at expanding to several different

agencies. So that is the hope for

next year. What we do on the back end is we do test

this model. We test the program to make sure it's

doing what it's supposed to be doing to see if we do need to tweak

it in some way. So we'll be expanding

to other agencies next year. Another thing we'll be doing

because our desire at the Cummings

foundation is to use behavioral health

to positively change the community at large.

So we're not just focused on police officers, even though

that's our first main project. We want

to help the community. And I know, and people in

my field know from history, when it comes to social change,

psychologists have always been at the cusp of it. Their research

has always been at the cusp of social change. And

so my desire is to put psychologists back in

the rightful place and let the experts

of behavior help lead the

community when it comes to social issues and inform

politicians and policymakers of how

what they're doing is impacting society and the community and what they

can do to make it better. So one of our next

projects is going to be dealing with intimate partner violence,

which is a huge concern right now in the US the numbers

have escalated. You have many women dying at the hands of men

and researchers. The few researchers who are

researching it, they have a call of action. They need more

researchers to help them figure out why this is happening and

what the solution is. And so the Cummings foundation wants to

participate in being a part of the solution. Yeah, that

is a very tough.

That's a very tough one. And I feel like most of us have had if,

you know, as if we haven't experienced it

ourselves, we know someone close to us who's experienced that.

Yeah. And I think that's how the world is right now. And it's very.

It's. It's just gotta stop, like, it's just gotta stop rolling downhill to

the generations to come. I feel that very strongly. Let's, like, what can

we do? We have to do something else to stop this

from being so common, so commonplace.

And it. I think it's been commonplace for a long time in some ways, but,

man, it doesn't. It was. It's got. It's got to stop. There's got to

be ways. So that's. That's exciting to me that you're.

You're working on that also. Yeah, I'm

very excited to work on that. So. Yeah,

and we. I'm sure we could have an entire conversation around that

topic, which we will do another time. Yes.

And there is the. The other one. We're actually working on that. This year,

we had a board member ask us a question.

Why hasn't there been a solution to the gun violence in America?

And so my team and I, we did a major review and we found that

a solution's been given. That's not the problem. The problem

is how Americans view guns.

And so we're doing what we call, like a meta

analysis or a scoping review where we pull

all this data in from all these researchers who've already

answered this question, and then we look at that in American

culture, and we're going to be tying the two together to

show hopefully, that the real issue is

how Americans see weapons and how Americans see

guns and how it's so entrenched in American

culture. And then we're going to be looking at what are the solutions to

that? What are the solutions to moving American

culture from the ideals that cause them

to not want to support laws

that will change who has access

to guns so that we can reduce the gun violence in

America? Yeah, these are just

like, you're just diving in at the very, very deepest end of the pool.

Right? It's like, let's see how many issues

that are super heated and have been going on for a

long time and we can't seem to resolve. And I'm gonna. I'm gonna do

what I can to. To do something about this. And the way you

come at it is so you come at it, I think, with

so much intelligence, research experience

and compassion and a level of understanding, I think,

for everyone involved in the. In the situation.

And because, you know, you were counseling the.

The predators, you know, so, you know, it's like,

those are the ones I want to have no understanding or no understanding and no

compassion for, but, you know, that it's. People are.

We can be a crazy bunch. People

are hurting. And

when I worked in the prison system, that's what

I saw. I mean, it was

sad how many of the inmates were the

victim of sexual violence, the victim of physical

violence at very young ages. They were orphans, they

were poor and homeless.

And so they became a victim of their circumstance.

And at the root of it,

I look at it as this. I was one decision in my life

away from being them because we

had some of the same childhood experiences.

The difference was the one decision that I made that was different

from their decision. And so we're alike.

We're not as different as we think that we are. And

if society at large would begin to see that,

that we are more alike than we are different, it would

heal a lot of things in our community. I think it probably

would. And I also do think this is some of the things that I

have noticed in general about people is sometimes they

refuse to feel.

Not. Not on purpose, but like they want to detach because they're afraid

it could happen to them. So it's easier to go, oh,

you over there. I'm gonna. Gonna. I'm gonna put my hand

you over there. I'm gonna. I'm gonna send you a little

goodwill. But I don't want to

emotionally engage at too much of a level, because it scares

me too much that what you're experiencing is a thing that I

could experience in life. And

that's. That's another. Maybe that's a schema. I don't know what that is, but

it's just. It seems like there is kind of that reaction where

that scares me. And so I'm just going to say, so

sorry. You'll get through.

It's a coping mechanism. Yeah, it's a coping

mechanism. It's a mechanism that people use

to deal with the horrors of the world. And

it's. It's not always beneficial because it

can cause you to not show

empathy for others. I mean, some of the.

One of the most impactful

situations for me was when I resigned

and I was walking through yards, and I had

people. Inmates that people call killers

collapsing to the ground in the middle of the yard. Not in private,

in front of other inmates, crying, I

can't believe you're leaving us. You're the only person in my life

who ever believed in me. Oh.

They are. We're all humans. And

I think that's one of the reasons, too, why I was able to have the

impact that I had, because I understood that I didn't treat

them like I was better than them. I was different from them.

We're humans. And the same needs that I have, you have too.

It doesn't matter if we look alike. I've had

white supremacists in the prison begin to only

want me to treat them. And it was because I

showed them we are alike. And we're more alike

than we are different. And I know you feel like that

idea and that belief was your protection in the world.

I understand it. But you don't have to hate

me because I'm here to help you. I'm not going to harm you.

Yeah. Such a, Such a position of power and

compassion on your part to just, you know, just be.

I don't know. I'm crying through this whole thing.

I am. You can see it. I'm like, you're making me cry,

you know, and I, I have over the years and, you know, I'm a white

person group in all white community. There weren't. There

wasn't. I mean, there was racism, but you didn't know who it was because there

weren't any black people or really people of any other race. So just a

little, little town in the 80s in Iowa. And so you learn

over time as our, as our communities get more integrated. And it was something.

When I moved to the South, I was very much like, I didn't

know. And I think I didn't, you know, you know, I, I only know was

taught the history I was taught. I didn't even know to go look for other

history. I didn't. So, you know, and I still don't know if

I know what to go look for. Sometimes I just. You read something and you're

like, that's insane. Like, I, you know, I had no idea.

But I know when I moved to the south and this is, you know, in

my mid-20s, I'm like, we gotta like, do something

to be integrated. You know, it's, you know, it's

way more black and white in the south where it's, you know,

it's more. Not necessarily 50, 50, but ish. But, you know, we're

more integrated there.

And it took, I,

it took a long time, I feel like, to find a

situation where I felt like I was accepted. You

know, I think there's just. There was such a stereotypes on

maybe both ends, but like, I didn't know the questions to ask. I didn't know

the things to say either, you know, so. And this was actually a

church and for a while. And so I think we're all showing up and just

being polite and not knowing what to do.

And then, you know, I think that what really helped me develop,

really starting to develop. And I'm saying all this for the

sake of, of people who are white, people who really don't. Maybe

they have a black friend. They know that there's this

racism thing that's going on in America. Sometimes it really, you know,

you know, pops out and grabs us like it did in 2020. And

we're just, you know, we don't know what to do. We.

And we haven't even thought about it. We haven't thought about what we haven't thought

about. We haven't known to ask the questions we know to ask,

to think to ask. You don't even know what you know because that history

is. Is far enough removed and are from some of us,

not from all of us. But I think in the north, we're not as. Or

Midwest, where I grew up, we're not as hands in the. We're not as aware,

but we have, we have a responsibility also. So

if, if we don't know if, if we're not integrated with people

of other cultures, so we just have the bias that they're

not going to vote the way we want them to, or they're, they're going to

take our resources or they're going to do whatever it is. Those are, those are

biases. And your life is better

when you learn outside your culture, when you

integrate with people who are not. Don't look like you.

And I think it's all. And it's not just black, white, all the,

all the different cultures that can be here. You will learn things

and it will make your world better. It will make you

more understanding, human. But it's not just that, like, you're gonna,

you're gonna find your people. You're going to realize that

there's people who don't look like you, who didn't grow up where you grew

up, who don't think like you, who don't

believe like you or vote like you, or live where you are the

same age in you, or, you know, if you're a female, they might be male

or vice versa. Like, you're gonna find people that

support you, that love you, that have your back

outside of where you think they're going to be. Right? So

if you, if, if you will take the energy and the time

and it might really take. If it's, if you're as a white person

in a largely white Community, or if you're in a community

that just kind of is. Is. Is together, but

separate, which. And I moved from Atlanta, and you've lived in Atlanta, and

sometimes Atlanta is like that. You know, we're together, but we're separate.

You know, usually you see groups of people, and they're not necessarily racially

mixed. So we have to. But

it's awkward. And so that's one thing. I think it's awkward at

first. It is. Especially if

you just don't say how you feel.

And, I mean, I know, you know, living on the west coast, people are a

little more passive and chill, and they don't. They're not as deep.

But, you know, I'm from the Southeast, and

me, I just say, let's have the conversation. Like, let's just get the

awkwardness over. Over. Let's say how we feel. Let's talk

about it, and then we can work through it. And

I think sometimes, too, people are afraid

to do that. They're afraid to just talk through it. There was

a white male sergeant that I had to work with with

one of the other stations, and it was awkward for me

at first. I mean, he was like, in the black community. We

would look at him and be like, classic. Go hunt a black person. You

know, like, he drove a big truck. He

loved big guns, you know, and he. And

so one of the first things I said to him was that, like, you hunt

black people. And it was a joke. He, like, looked,

and he just burst into tears and laughing.

And that's where the conversation started. And it was hilarious

because people were kind of afraid to get in our conversation because we were just

going back and forth with black and white stereotypes. He's like, why

do black people like Cheesecake Factory? I'm

like, white people don't season their food, you know,

and all the stereotypes he and I

both learned about each other, we were throwing them

out at each other, just getting it

over with and then talking about, well, where do you think the

stereotype came from? Do you agree with it? We just had the

uncomfortable conversation. Yeah. I do

think also sometimes people are just bad at knowing how to get out there and

meet people. I think there's also that in society. So

it's not just like, you just, you know. And we got it. We got to

address that, too, maybe, because we can't get to know each other if we're just

bad at. At knowing how to talk to people. And I just think more people

are. Feel awkward about that than not.

So, you know, sometimes you just Go compliment

their hair. Give. Give them a compliment, you know? You

know, just say. Ask them a question about, you know, you got

your shirt on. Say, that's interesting. Where does that. Where does that

come from? What's. What's that all about? You know, I don't know. Sports

team. You gotta, like. And if you're. If you're next to each other,

ask them questions about, you know, their work and where

they grew up and just. Just start asking some. Just throw out some

questions. Just.

Sometimes the simplest way to disarm people is

just to look them in the eyes and smile.

That's true. Yeah. Yeah. And. And that can start a

conversation. I mean, I blame social media

for people's lack of communication skills

these days. And then it was just compounded by

Covid when people were separated from each other.

So people are definitely lacking in

communication skills. And I've had people come to me

just to be coached on that. Like, how do I

talk to people? I'm not dating. I don't know how to introduce

myself to people. I don't know how to start a conversation.

I've had people come to me just for that. Like, can you help

me and teach me how to do that? Yeah. I

almost feel like that's. That makes me go. I feel like that's like a. Multiple

episodes I could do, but it does. It does feel like that. Right. Like,

that's, I think, way before COVID people. I mean, I grew up with people that

were bad. I. Most people

that I know have not been great at that.

I don't know. And I think it was something that is a skill I learned.

I don't think I was great at it either for a long time. So

anyway, that's. That's ideas. Ideas to.

You know, if you just don't talk to anyone, fine. Go start by

talking to someone who looks like you, and then after that, go talk to someone

who doesn't look like you.

Yes. I've been since I went into the psychology

field. I thank my program because they made us take

classes that brought out

our biases and they made us work through them. And

so I've had a habit of always.

Because I know my biases, I intentionally

go interact with the people that I have that

bias against so that I can deconstruct it.

Yeah, that's. And that's. I think that's the example that we should all

follow. Just, you know, whether we have a class on it or not.

Is. There is. You're going to. You don't even know sometimes you have a belief

system until it's threatened or challenged.

Yes.

So,

today is Juneteenth, when we are recording this, but,

you know, we've talked some on race and, you know,

even though people will be not listening to it on this day, is

there anything you want to say about the day and the significance of it?

No one is free until everyone is free.

And no one can do

their best until everyone

has resources and everyone has the same rights and

everyone is being treated the same way.

And while we

feel like we've come so far,

we still have so much further to go.

There's so much inequity

within a capitalistic system. System.

And so I'm thankful today that

I finally met people in

the right places who did

not see my race, did not see my gender,

did not see my sexuality. They saw

my skill. Yeah. And my integrity

and my heart. And they put me in a position

where now I can help other people.

And I'm grateful for it. I'm very

grateful for it. Where I hurt

is knowing that many people won't get the opportunity

that I got because they're Hispanic

or black or. Or Asian or female or

transgender or gay or lesbian.

They won't get. Or disabled. They won't

get the same opportunity because people look at them

for those things, those outside things, instead of

looking inside at who they really are. Do you have any

thoughts on merit based? I know we talked to merit based before. And how.

How do we get there where it's clear, just clearly

the. The best person for the job or the best person for the,

you know, gets it without. Without seeing the

stuff that might cause the bias?

I don't. The only way you're

going to fix that is to fix the people. That. That's the

only way you're going to fix that is to fix the people. And it's sad

because there's recent studies that show things, for example,

that a white male felon is more likely to get a

job than a black male who's never been arrested before.

It's. People

lead with their biases. And the danger of it is people

don't think they have biases. And it's

because there's such a negative stereotype. And

I feel like we throw the word

racist around a little bit too much these days,

and people are going to automatically throw up their guard because that

word has such a negative connotation. And so I've had

conversations with people that I knew had negative biases against

black people. But when I use the word bias.

They're more receptive than if I just said, hey, you're racist. Do you know that?

You know? And so I

A lack of education is always

room for destruction. It's always the route to destruction.

And so when you don't know yourself, when you don't know

your beliefs truly, when you don't know who you are, when you don't know how

you see the world, there's no way you can

correct for your biases at all.

And the only way to fix that is for people to

understand that they have biases and you have to be

intentional about correcting. For me, I grew

up in South Carolina, about 40 minutes away from

the. The slave dogs. My father

helped integrate schools in South Carolina in 81. It

was 81 when they were integrating schools. And when they

integrated them, the wealthier whites

created a private school in my town so they didn't have to go to school

with us. And it left us with the poor whites. And so they

zoned the middle to upper class blacks to go to

school with the poor whites. I had to pass schools to go to school

because they were zoning to make sure poor

whites only at least went to school with middle class, upper class black.

So I grew up going to school being

called the N word. You know, white boys telling me they can't date

me because I'm an N. I grew up with that

stuff. I was interviewing and people thought

my resume belonged to a male because it's science and math on

it. And I would walk in an interview and they would ask me to

multiply because they didn't believe a black woman knew math,

mathematics. So I grew up very

entrenched in you cannot trust white people.

But I became aware of my bias. And so when

I met a white person, I intentionally said, you need

to give them a chance. They're all not bad.

You have to understand your biases. Yeah.

And vice versa, you know, white and black. And

this conversation to me is such a good example

of the way forward as

humanity is to start

talking to each other, to lay down our guard a little

bit. And I think in politics it's

been so much where it's like, all wrong, all wrong.

Right. And that's just how it. I feel like the last

20 years has been more and more like, let's get. Keep each other mad at

each other. Yes. And that keeps us from having

conversations where so many things could probably

be resolved really simply

if we were talking to each other and listening to each other

and not just coming at each other with. You're so

stupid. That's why. So dumb. You're so, you know, you're, you know, whatever.

All the, the, the words that come out then where we're, you know,

calling each other names and, or we're just not going to listen because

you're not doing what I want you to do, you

know, And I want you to do this because this is the way to do

it. And even if you're right and it

is the way to do it, is this person harming you?

Right. Are you going to be harmed by listening? Right. Even if you know

that, you know they're wrong and you know, that's a whole nother thing.

We have our strong beliefs. Is it really harming you

to be kind to someone who doesn't, who

isn't what you think they should be, who isn't doing what you think they should

do? And you know, let's be honest

with ourselves. I do things that I don't think I should be

doing. I don't agree with my own self. So, you know, you know what I'm

saying? Like, we're all like that too. So we all do things we don't think

we should really be doing. So give everyone a little grace.

And just because one person, and

there's. Every demographic has, every demographic, no matter how you look

at it, has people that are going to be, can be harmful

people. And, and I think every demographic has people that are

good, that are good to people, even if they're irritated about it

or what you know, or, or have a bias or they're still going to, in

their nature, do, do good. And this kind

of goes back to what you were saying about

different communities and how polarized they can be.

So this black and white concrete, very concrete

thinking that you see right or left. Right. No, in between.

It comes from a lack of experiencing other cultures and people who

are different from you because that does something to the brain.

When you're able to see differences,

see differences in culture, understand that not everybody

operates the same way that you do, you then

can understand that two opposing things can

both be the truth. An officer

can. Yeah, an officer can be racist but

also have PTSD and a mental health

challenge. Two, two opposing views can

both be true. And I think that's what

we're seeing a lot of now, that people don't understand that,

that we can believe two different things and they both be

accurate. Right, that's, that's true.

And so much in. Right in politics because I, I have, I

listen to both I, in terms of, like, people talking of who are very strong

beliefs on both sides, I, I tend to go, yeah, well, what you're

talking about. I think everyone agrees with what you're talking about. I think everyone agrees

with because, like, you're talking, you're talking about maybe

I want to be able to get a good job that I'm not going to

be excluded from because of how I look. And everyone will go, well, yeah, you

should. And the other side is like, this is about national security and we can't

be threatened by, you know, terrorism, all that

stuff. And I'd be like, I think everyone agrees with that too. Like, you know,

so, like, you're, it's just, you're looking at different things. So.

And that's where the, the talking to each other, it's like, well, yeah,

all these things are commonly

agreed on. Right, right. So. And I

know I, I thought once when I went through a contentious divorce, I know you've

had one. It's like if, if, if that can get

settled legally and that kind of

environment where you're like, there's no way to come to an agreement on this of

any sort because we're so far apart, then what

couldn't be agreed on? Right.

Right. Act like all these issues in the country can't come to some kind of

conclusion. Sure they can. Sure they can. What it takes is

saying it has to come to an agreement and then reasonable people at the

table, you know. Right. And, and not the thought that

in order for me to survive, I have to put another group down, I have

to step on someone else in order for me to get my needs

met. Everyone can get their needs

met. There is a solution where we all can get our

needs met and we don't have to fight each other or harm each other

to get that done. And I think that's what we need. To be looking for.

And that's the only solution in my mind. I don't think there is any other

solution. Yes, the only solution towards peace

is one where everyone can, can have, you know, the,

what they, what they need to just have a peaceful life. Right,

right. You know, to have a peaceful, prosperous life without, you

know, the amount of work that you put in should

be the reward you get back, you know? Yes. If you don't want to go

get a doctorate and three master's degrees. I mean, I don't. So,

you know, like, there's going to be a different.

Maybe I do. Maybe I'll change my mind, but you know what I'm saying? Like,

obviously, then who. Who gets to have the seat at the table? The one

who's done the work. You know, the one who's done. The people who have done

the work in the different areas should be the ones who have the seat at

the table and the voice, so. Right. Agree.

Yeah. Well, thank you so much for your time today.

So if you guys want to learn more, I'm gonna say it one more time

for the Cummings foundation, it's C u m m I n g

s and then c

fbh.org CummingsCFBH.org and then you can just email admin@cummingscfbh.org

and Dr. Longshore,

any last words you'd like to share with everybody?

Go talk to someone today who doesn't look like

you, talk like you, doesn't go to the same church as you,

doesn't believe the same thing as you. That's where you can

start to become a different and happier person.

I am in that and saying that. See, people have been saying that forever,

and now I have a doctor who said it.

All right, Dr. Longshore, let's see your. Let's see your shirt. My ancestors

would be proud. Yes, they would. Yes, they would.

Screenshot that.

Oh, thank you so much. I appreciate you so much as a human and

I'm just so thankful to have met you and have gotten to work with

you. So thank you for coming on today. Thank you. I

am thankful to have met you, my newest

white friend.

That's awesome. All right, and that concludes

our two part episode with Dr. Davena Longshore with the Cummings foundation for

behavioral health and all of her incredible insights

into our first responders. Stay tuned for more from

Healthy, Happy, Wise Wealthy with new episodes coming every Thursday.

Thanks for joining us on Healthy Happy, Wise Wealthy. If you believe in

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next time. You all have a wonderful week and

keep on keeping on feeling

like you're stuck in a hurricane because

everything around you just keeps on turning

I can see searching for run escape.