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The BeWell Podcast series discusses a variety of topical wellbeing issues based on identified student pressure points and national health and wellbeing campaigns for our campus in Qatar.
Hi, everyone. Welcome back to be well Doha. My name is Yana. This episode is gonna be a little bit different than the last couple episodes that we've been recording. Basically, the last couple of episodes have been me introducing a topic and having a couple of guests on, and then we basically just discuss this certain topic and I'd have, you know, some questions prepared.
Yana:I'd have the topic prepared. I'd have, like, an entire paragraph ready to read off and it's all just, like, like, super structured and and it's it's this episode is very different. This episode is basically I have one very special guest. He came up to me a couple weeks ago and he was talking about how he was excited about the podcast and he wanted to be on because he wanted to share his story. And I was like, well, first of all, that's incredible.
Yana:And I thought, oh, okay. I just put him in with one of the other episodes because he could just talk about, you know, failure. He could talk about managing health relationships or social media. And then he told me that he has a story that is very rare. His story, he is essentially I'm not gonna take away from his spotlight, but he is a cancer survivor.
Yana:He is very, very brave to be wanna be on this podcast and to volunteer to share his story with everybody. So even if you've not, you know, had cancer before, I'm sure every single person on the planet knows someone who's had cancer, and we've all been through difficult days. And I think learning from someone who's been through some pretty difficult days, I'd say, and gone out the other end and just been super strong and super brave, we can all take away from that. We can all be inspired by that, and we can all learn from it. So without further ado, will our special blessed guest please introduce himself?
Romeo:Hi, guys. I, my name is Romeo Joseph. I'm a 1st year student at the University of Aberdeen. My major is accounting and finance, and I'm here to talk about my story.
Yana:Yeah. Amazing. So, Romeo, you mentioned that you were a cancer survivor earlier today. Do you wanna tell us a little bit more about your story? When were you diagnosed?
Yana:What were you diagnosed with? How was that process, the beginning stages of it?
Romeo:I was diagnosed in September 22, 2021. I was diagnosed with a brain tumor. It was very scary. Like, I was terrified, to be honest. I don't know what was gonna happen.
Romeo:I don't know. Like, this was before it was they even told me it was cancerous. It was just a surgery. I was just saying, what if it's cancerous? What if it's spread to other parts of my body?
Romeo:And so, it was just, like, there were no symptoms. I was diagnosed, so I just woke up, one day with, like, immense head pain. Like, I couldn't even, like, there was no side effects. Usually with a brain tumor, it's just like dizziness and vomiting or anything. But for me, it's just all the head pain.
Romeo:I could walk normally. I had my normal strength. So we went to the doctor and, like, he tested my strength, my my eyes, everything, and he's like, this is all just stress. Like, there's nothing to worry about. He just gave me, like, a few painkillers, a few, like, steroid injections for the pain, and it didn't work.
Romeo:Like, I would go back home and, like, the the next following nights would be, like, I couldn't sleep at all. I wouldn't, like, I would be, like, I reached the point to where I was in so much pain. I was literally banging my head on the window and, like, like, begging for help, basically. I reached that point and we kept going and they kept saying, no, it's just stress stress until, the emergency doctor did an x-ray for my neck and he was like, I found the problem. It's the your neck muscles are being compressed.
Romeo:And he's like, I'm like, okay. This is this would be from the head. You should do a scan for the head. He's like, no. Don't worry.
Romeo:This is from it's caused by stress.
Yana:Oh my god.
Romeo:Yes. And I'm like, are you serious? He was like, why are you and he's like, this is all stress. He's like, you reached why you're so young.
Romeo:Why are you so stressed?
Yana:Oh my god.
Romeo:Yeah. I'm like, better to make to do a scan before we reach a point. And he's like, no. Don't worry. I I'm a doctor.
Romeo:I I know I know what's wrong with you. If there were if you had something, there would be other signs. Okay? So he just gave me another injection. Basically, a special one for the neck muscles.
Romeo:And thankfully, the pain went that a few hours later for 1 week, it was like a special steroid injection that, what do you call it? Decreases, like, the size of the brain. Mhmm. So the pain decreased for 1 week. Another week later, it came back even more.
Yana:Worse. Yeah.
Romeo:Yes. Worse. And then we went again and again until I booked an appointment to the the neurologist. And I told him he looked at my file.
Romeo:I told him the story. He was like, the that other doctor who said that the stress is wrong. This has something to do with the nerves of the brain. I'll give you some medicine for that. And I was like, are you serious right now?
Romeo:I'm just like, just do a scan for the brain just so we can be sure there's nothing. He after a few minutes of arguing, he's like, I'm gonna do a scan for the brain, but just to show you that you're wrong and I'm right, that there's nothing in my brain. Mhmm. I went this is the funny part. I went to the to do the MRI, which is the MRI is a scan for the brain.
Romeo:And, I came back and I went to his office after that. He's like, hello, sit down. I wanna I wanna I'm gonna show you, that there's nothing. And he had the big screen behind him so we could see the result. He opened up on his computer and I whatever is on his computer was on the screen that I could see.
Romeo:And once once he opened the scan, he, saw the the brain and he saw, like, a huge big, like, bulge of white something white, like, the the shoulder is something attached. He opened it and, like, I'm reminding you now that he said, there's nothing, he's doing the scan to show me that it's all wrong, like, I'm wrong. He opened the screen, he saw this huge bulb, and he literally opened his eyes in shock and his mouth, he put his hand, he slapped on his mouth for, like, a minute. He kept doing it for 2 minutes. He was zooming in and out of the of the of the screen, of the image, and he was like, come back tomorrow at 3 PM.
Romeo:I'll be there to discuss it with my team. Come back tomorrow at 3 PM. Because we have to do another, scan but with color. He has to, like, put it in so he can see clearly what it is. But he said, come back tomorrow at 3.
Romeo:I went back home that night, same thing, no sleep at all. Like, I'm like, I couldn't anymore. But by the time it reached like, I stayed awake from I went back home from the MRI scan and the result at 10 PM. From 10 PM to 10 AM, I was still awake. I didn't sleep at all.
Romeo:I was all in pain. So I said at 10 AM, I I told my mom, he said 3 PM. I said hold on. I I can't anymore. I need to go back.
Romeo:I need to go back. I need it. And we I thought that because he we did the scan, he would put it in the system. So if I go back now, they can see it, they can do something. I went to the emergency in the private hospital, we told them what happened, and they're like, no no no, this is stress, this is stress.
Romeo:They saw this thing and, like, this is stress. I'm like, I'm over here dying, and you're and you're like, this is stress. And, like, we we started making problems. We demanded them to call him and bring him here now. They called them, and he's like, no.
Romeo:I'm coming at 3. And he was like I was like, I I reached the point of enough is enough. And yeah. Short a long story short, they, after they saw the proper after they properly saw the image, another neurologist, they they said I need surgery within the next 12 hours or because it's reached the point where my like, the water was all stuck in my head, the the tumor, like, is blocking the water flow in my head, And he's like, we wanted to go to the UK for surgery. And he's like, no.
Romeo:No. You can't go to the UK because first of all, the air pressure in the plane. And second thing, by the time we reach the UK, reach the hospital, 12 hours will be done already. So we said, we'll call Hamad, talk to Hamad. Maybe they have some special accommodation.
Romeo:They'll they'll be able to get you to the UK, and they I want I want to Hamad.
Yana:Hamad is the public hospital here, the public, med medic medical centers here.
Romeo:Yeah. And, we we showed them the scan from the private hospital and we're like, they said this, I need surgery in the next 12 hours. The Sudhai doctor, he's in an emergency. He was like, okay. I'll get I'll get you an MRI tomorrow.
Romeo:And And I need they said I need surgery in the next 12 hours. And we told them, he's like, no. Sorry. We're filled up. But luckily, I survived the next 12 hours.
Romeo:My brain didn't explode. Yeah. And luckily, I went to the I got the tumor. They told me the next day, and I did the surgery. And they removed all the cancer.
Romeo:They removed the whole tumor, thankfully. There was nothing left.
Yana:Amazing. Well, okay. First of all, I can't imagine having gone through so many appointments and to so many doctors and being like, I'm in insane amount of pain and being told time and time again, you're just stressed, you're just stressed. This is like borderline gaslighting. How do you feel like it's affected you emotionally?
Yana:And obviously if you weren't stressed before, you're stressed now. They're just telling you you're stressed, you're stressed. It's nothing. Like just go home, take some painkillers. I can't imagine being borderline gaslighted to that extent.
Yana:How do you, how did you feel in that moment? How did you kind of process it? Did you kind of, you know, feel like, oh, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm crazy. Or did you think, no.
Yana:There's definitely something wrong here, and I should have to go get proper medical care to figure it out.
Romeo:Well, it's, speaking about stress, I was already stressed because of the pain. So, like, that's that's only, like, on the first level. Yeah. And second thing, like, even before I went to before the pain even started, I was, like, I felt something in my head. Like, I physically felt it.
Romeo:I felt something pushing even though it wasn't pain. Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay. So, anyway, when they kept telling me I'm stressed, I'm stressed, I'm stressed with all the pain in my head, I'm like, I need to be heard.
Romeo:I need someone to listen. I don't want I don't care that you have your education or your what what your studies say, and, other, like, results. Like, I feel I know there's something. I was like that made me even more stressed. I was, like, angry.
Romeo:I just couldn't because of the pain, I couldn't express my my anger because I was already in like too tired.
Yana:Yeah. It's frustrating. I can't imagine that. My gosh.
Romeo:Like even thinking about it now after everything's done, like, I'm like, I I'm just I still feel so angry at them. Like, I could have like died or something.
Yana:Absolutely. Yeah. To all future doctors that are potentially listening to this or any current doctors, maybe listen to your patients when they're telling you that they're in pain and take the safe route as opposed to just being like, oh, no. No. No.
Yana:You're you're you're making this all up. It's all in your head.
Romeo:Like, speaking from experience, like, it doesn't I don't have to have the symptoms. Like, if there's something wrong, like, I don't have any symptoms besides this head pain and everyone has headaches. So, like, you should just take extra caution. Yeah. Especially if you have a private hospital, we're paying you for this.
Yana:Yeah. Okay. So you ended up getting the MRI and then you ended up getting the surgery. What happened after after that?
Romeo:I was in ICU for, like, a week, thankfully. But, thank God, like, I'm much more religious because of this. But, after surgery, they they they told me don't expect to walk for the next 2 months. Because, you know, it's part of the brain that the surgery also on the part of the brain where you where you walk. Yeah?
Romeo:I got up from the next day and I started walking with the Yeah. Yeah. So, like, thankfully, I I I feel like I'm thankful for that. So I said in then I was I was, able to go back home, but from the second day, my mom saw one of the doctors in the hallway. She didn't tell me this at the time, because I was still in ICU, and she asked because she asked them how the results were.
Romeo:Because they put the tumor in a box or something in the lab, and they asked, let's test it if it's cancerous or not. She didn't tell me this at the time. She didn't want to stress me out more. But when she, went out and saw a doctor, she asked them how are the how's the first result going? He was like, it's not good.
Romeo:Like, this it's not good. And he was like, but we'll see the other results because it just this result just says if it's cancerous or not. We'll see the future results to give us more detail. Mhmm. She didn't tell me this, but, like, I mean, I didn't even know, to be honest, until I when I left ICU 1 week later, it's like I do I was with my brother.
Romeo:I was having dinner, and we were, like, laughing. I started laughing. I had a nosebleed. I was like, oh my god. That's not a good sign.
Romeo:That's not a good sign. We we rushed to we rushed the emergency. I got checked out. Thankfully, it had nothing to do with the surgery. I don't know why, like, it had to be there, right next to right after the surgery.
Romeo:Yeah. But they said that they had results of the, what do you call it, of the tests after after the tumor. They said it was stage 4. Yeah. Yeah.
Romeo:And especially the size was huge of the tumor. So I was like like, we're gonna have to do chemo, do radiation, and everything. And then I did the CT scan after that, for my whole body. Luckily, nothing spread. Especially, it's it's amazing when you have stage 4 cancer, like, the the patient was, like, has cancer around their body.
Romeo:It all spread for me. I'm I'm so lucky it stayed. Like, it didn't spread for me enough to do. So, yeah, I was able to do treatment after that. Amazing.
Romeo:Yeah.
Yana:So I understand that you took a gap year when you were going through Yeah. Chemo and radiation. During that gap year, what were the things that, you know, lifted you up or made your darker days brighter when you were going through something super difficult and super challenging?
Romeo:Okay. First off, before I get to that, I wanted to say that, for anybody, like, getting, like anybody sick or any other going through stuff, just, Staying positive is the key. Like, you have to stay positive through everything.
Yana:To be optimistic. Yeah.
Romeo:Because that's what that's what maybe helped me get through everything. And what helped me, like, actually, what kept me positive, first thing was my mom. Honestly, she she was with me the whole time, like and to be honest, she was much more stressed than me. You would you would see my face. I'm just more of a chill dude.
Romeo:And she'll be like, she's praying. She's praying. She's, for me and everything. So God bless her. I love you, mama, if you're listening to this.
Romeo:And, yeah. I just and I have my friends, they would always from school, like, they're my brothers. They would always check up on me and everything. So that that like, known people were there for me, and my family, and my friends. I that kept me strong.
Romeo:Like, I'm like I kept telling myself, you're not alone. Yeah. Yeah. That kept me positive.
Yana:That's amazing. Is there anything that they would do in particular, your family and friends, that would make it easier for you or that would make it a little less draining every day?
Romeo:Okay. Now my friends were in the UK. Okay. So, most I would do is like like FaceTime with them. So but for me, it just would be like they would they would ask about me, they would just just keep on contact with me.
Romeo:For me, that was enough. Because I understand they're in a different country, they can't do much. Yeah. My family, they would because I would, I feel my house is like bad vibes after the after what happened. Mhmm.
Romeo:So they would just take me out as much as possible, not really help me. Just even going for a walk in the mall, going out for in the park, that's enough for me. Just getting out of the house was yeah. That's it. And my brother just playing board games with me, that was the best thing.
Yana:Yeah. So to kind of not make it the center of everything, I guess, to kinda distract you time
Romeo:and time again.
Yana:Do something that you enjoy.
Romeo:Until I started taking until I came back to uni because I had the gap year.
Yana:Yeah. Yeah. So speaking of that, I can't imagine going from graduating school to university. That's already such a big jump for a lot of people to go. It's a completely different environment.
Yana:It's, the courses are completely different, what you do in university as opposed to what you do in school. Is there anything, now I know you mentioned that your symptoms weren't as bad as they usually would be.
Romeo:Yeah.
Yana:Is there anything that you think the university could do or should have done, for people who may have had symptoms that are worse than you?
Romeo:Okay. Now as I, as she mentioned that, my symptoms weren't as bad, so I didn't really need that much help. But for other patients who, who do need help, maybe they could because, you know, with chemo, you need, like you you lose your focus earlier, like, a little like, much easier. For me, even, like, sometimes I still have my short term memory, it's still, like, horrible. Yeah.
Romeo:So, like, it it's much worse for other people. They're thin, they're sometimes some of them can't walk, they have so little energy. So the university, if it ever overcomes more people like like this, they should, like, give, you know, extra tutoring sessions to them, extra they should be more patient with them, especially with assessments. If it's if it's like an essay, they need a they would give them a deadline, if the teachers should approach them, like, give them, like, personal, sessions to help them understand, make sure everything's okay with them.
Yana:This kinda links into an episode that we did earlier. I think it was the first episode where we talked about failure and how not every teaching style works with every student. Obviously, every student, whether they're sick or not, would have their own sort of, preferences to learning and even barriers to learning. So while some students can understand from just reading a presentation and taking notes, other students would prefer more interactive
Romeo:Yeah.
Yana:You know, learning environment and stuff like that. So obviously what Romeo said here was on point and I can't imagine like having to go through something this terrible and, you know, the university not being as a con or any educational facility, whether it's school or university or that. How long actually this is goes back to the beginning. I should have asked you this, but how long you said that you had a really bad headache and that was kind of the sign that maybe there was something wrong. Yeah.
Yana:How long did that headache last? Approximately. I know.
Romeo:You mean, like, until they found the tumor or
Yana:Until you decided, oh, I should probably go to the ER for this.
Romeo:Oh, because, you know, it was actually, I know what normal headaches feel like. They're like this like a normal headache, but like this was, like, immense. And so, like, I took, like, 2, Panadols and made them go away. And I took an Ibuprofen, which is basically a stronger version of Panadol. And it still didn't go.
Romeo:I'm like, and, like, we just had we just decided to go then because, like, 3 panels and, like, within the 2 hours and didn't even decrease by a bit. Mhmm. So we're like, we need to go check maybe there's something wrong. Mhmm.
Yana:Okay. So, obviously, people mental illness doesn't really need a sort of a reason or a background story to it. It usually just happens out of nowhere. But with someone going through something super difficult, just like you, Romeo, would how did you how do you feel like your your mental health was impacted by all of this? Because like you mentioned, this this all kind of happened all of a sudden.
Yana:You mentioned that you were stressed and you were, sort of, you know, feeling frustrated and angry. After, you know, the surgery and after everything went well, how do you feel like your mental health and your mental state has shifted from how you were before to how you were
Romeo:Was this, you're asking for during chemo or even after finishing chemo? Both. Both. Okay. I'll start with doing treatment.
Romeo:Yeah. Okay. Well, because it's you know, you're, when once you have a surgery and then you start treatment, that's a lot to take in in and for a person. So I was, like, also so stressed. Yeah.
Romeo:Even if my side effects weren't as much as, like, compared to other patients, it's still a lot. And, like, I had, like, a bunch of lot a lot of anger inside of me. And, like, sometimes, like, I I I would get angry. I would, like, sometimes, as a few moments, I would explode to to people who had, like, no relation with what I've been through. And, like, I don't mean to do that.
Romeo:Like, sometimes I just bundle it up so much and, like, the smallest the smallest thing sets me off Yeah. To be honest. Like, yeah. So I was like, during treatment, I'll get angry quickly. I was like, 247, I was on the verge of just, like, being emotionally, like, unsettled.
Romeo:Mhmm. But, like, like, maybe it would also be, like, I thought I had many friends with me in school, and, like, only a few of them would stay, like, keep on checking on me. Mhmm. And, like, others would be, like, they would have known about it, and they didn't even check-in on me. Mhmm.
Romeo:So I guess that that's what added to my anger. Yeah. So, like, like, doesn't like, do they not even care what I've been through? But, like, thinking what like, after I've done I finished now, I think I've calmed down a bit. Like, I'm I'm a much more of a calm person.
Romeo:Like, I feel like the anger has just faded out. Yeah.
Yana:So do you think a large portion of the anger came from the chemotherapy, or do you think that it was just your state of mind at that time?
Romeo:I think it was my state of mind at that time. Like, because I was getting angry very quickly because, like, I I I was still maybe in shock. Even after after those few months, I was still in shock after what happened. Like, I can't believe this is happening to me and everything.
Yana:Correct me if I'm wrong, but there's still a risk of it when you're doing chemotherapy. There's still a risk of there being bad news that, oh, it's it's come back or, oh, it's actually not getting better, stuff like that.
Romeo:After I did the before I did after the surgery, they did another scan, and they were like, we don't see any cancer anymore, but we're just gonna do chemo and radiation just in case.
Yana:To be on the safe side.
Romeo:So, like, during chemo, chemo kills cancer anyway. Yeah. So during the chemo, there's, like, no chance of it coming back. Mhmm. So, like, I did a scan right after I finished it.
Romeo:They said there's nothing, so you're free to go. But, like, obviously, in the future, you know, it's cancer. Yeah. There's always a chance of it coming back in the future. Yeah.
Romeo:Like, during that period of chemo, like, there was, like, no chance Yeah. Probably.
Yana:Okay. Well, I, first of all, wanna thank you for being on this episode. I'm so excited that we got to do an episode with somebody who has such a a special story. Now is there anything that you want people to take away from this episode or from your story? Is there anything that you want them to keep in mind when they're going through something difficult, whether it's cancer or something just as as basic as a bad day?
Romeo:Yeah. Actually, just, like, even though, as I mentioned, maybe I was, like, I wasn't I was very, emotionally, like, unsettled, I was still I still had faith, like, you're supposed to be positive. I guess that's why that's why, like, there was that all my scans were good. I just have a feeling, like, I was always, like, like, part of me was always so positive that there was nothing in me. Like, just I just had put my faith in God and everything, and I stayed positive.
Romeo:And, like, you know, just that's how it's gonna be for me. Like, whatever's gonna happen, I'm I'm doing what I can.
Yana:Yeah. Absolutely. I like, you kind of acknowledge that things are out of your control here and you can do the best you can. And it is very can I just say you are very strong to just stay positive during these times? Because again, it's probably one of the most difficult things a human being can go through, the scariest things.
Yana:So the fact that you were able to stay positive and stay strong and stay, you know, and even after you've gone through all the difficult stuff, you still want to come back and talk about it and tell people about it and, you know, kind of spread that light. Yeah. Because while you were able to stay positive, some people maybe you were not as as fortunate or not don't have that same mindset.
Romeo:Because most people, they're not they're not very comfortable talking about their story. And I understand that, but, like, I just, my goal is just to, like, help people, like, whatever you're going through, just stay positive. That's my that's my, like, goal Yeah.
Yana:Studying guys. And like you said, earlier in the episode, you know, he had his friends and his family to kinda distract him from, you know, the terrible stuff that was happening. You know, board games, going on walks, stuff like that. That's really like, you know, it's even it can make anyone's day even a little bit better. So, I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.
Yana:I hope you took away something great from it. I know I did. Romeo, thanks again for being on the episode. I'm so glad that you asked be on this episode on
Romeo:this podcast. Having me.
Yana:No. It was a pleasure. Now as you guys know, if you have any topics you want to suggest or you wanna hear more about on this podcast, you can email well-being@afg-abdn.edu.qa. Thank you for listening, and, yeah. Have an awesome day, everybody.