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The podcast that teaches tweens and teens necessary life skills to achieve their goals, develop unconditional confidence, cultivate positive habits and become UNSTOPPABLE in all areas of life!
Will (00:12.334)
What's up y'all. Welcome back to another episode of the unstoppable you podcast. It's your host coach, Will. And if you're not already subscribed to this podcast, I mean, what are we doing? Hit subscribe so you don't miss out on another episode where we essentially speed run tips and tricks to improve your life. So I appreciate you for being here. Let's lock in. this might be kind of a cheesy way to start a podcast episode, but I was on the way to the golf course yesterday and I looked outside and there was this house that was actually a really awesome house.
but the front yard was absolutely chaotic. you know, overgrown look like it hadn't been touched in months. There were weeds everywhere and it honestly kind of ruined the appeal of the house. And I was thinking, man, I really want to get out of my car. That was my first thought. I want to go mow this yard. You know, I got my white new balances in the back. I've got my jorts. You know, I've got my, you know, my bucket hat and I really want to
be in like full on dad mode. you know, coach will and dad mode, but no, was actually real talk thinking through like how that's very similar to how a lot of our minds work, right? Very life coachy thing to be able to relate a overgrown front yard to how our minds work. But when we don't take care of our mind, that's kind of what it looks like and what it feels like. So today I'm going to give you
three simple habits that you can follow and practice to tend to your mental garden. And by the end of this episode, you're to know exactly how to clear out all of those mental weeds that are holding you back. Because here's what's ultimately happening. Your mind is running on autopilot. You scroll through social media for hours and you wonder why you feel anxious. You hang out with people that are really negative and you wonder why you feel drained.
We replay mistakes every single moment of every single day. And we wonder why we have no confidence. And the worst part of this is we don't really realize that our mental garden is overgrown until it's already a mess. Negative thoughts are like weeds. And if you don't pull them out early, and if you don't stop watering those things,
Will (02:31.084)
If you don't pull them out early, then they take over everything. So I want you to think about your mind as a garden and you are the gardener. Every thought that you think, every piece of content you consume, every conversation you have with your family and your friends, with strangers in a video game, right? Those seeds are being planted. Some grow into flowers, some grow into weeds. And here's the kicker. You get to decide what stays and what goes.
So I'm going to give you those three habits to tend to your mental garden. And the first one is probably my favorite, but you should still stick around to number two and number three.
Will (03:12.941)
I gotta call.
The first habit is all about daily weeding. And that is to notice your thoughts every single day. Take a few moments, minutes to notice what's actually growing in your mental garden, in your brain. Are those thoughts helpful? Are they harmful? Are they encouraging? Are they, you know, making you anxious? Because most people go throughout their entire day without ever actually checking in on what seeds you're planting.
So pick a time. This is kind of what I do. Morning works best for me. I think right before bed also works really well and just kind of pause, ask yourself, you know, what am I thinking about right now? If you feel a negative emotion and you feel overwhelmed or maybe you feel stressed, then try to think to yourself what thought is leading to that overwhelm. Then name the thought. Maybe it's like thinking to yourself, I'm going to do poorly at my track.
event this weekend, or this girl doesn't like me, or I'm probably going to fail in my, my test next week. Maybe I'm not smart enough, right? Those are all weeds. Everyone hates me. That's something that I told myself all the time. It's like that. No one likes me. I'm never going to have friends. And because I'm never going to have friends, I'm never going to be confident. Everybody had, those are all weeds that I was watering when I was a student. And you know, that kind of lasted all the way up until college because weeds
And it's real. And this is this. And this exercise is really, really important because weeds lose their power when you bring awareness to them and you name them. Right. So that's the first habit that I really want you to start practicing. And it's one of the hardest things that I think someone can do. I mean, I know adults, I know some of my grandparents. Okay. mean, bless them. I love them. Of course. But y'all, they like, they don't know what they think every day. And so this isn't just a
Will (05:12.152)
you know, something that, you know, teenagers need to do. This is something that I think every human being can benefit from. And you know, we, just don't do enough. Okay. So that's a habit. Number one, habit number two might sound really obvious and that's to water the good stuff. If you pull, if you only pull weeds, then your garden is going to be empty. You know I'm saying? Like if you only reject negativity, then yeah, it might not be as negative, but it's definitely not necessarily going to be positive.
So when you do something well, acknowledge it. Think about the thing that you're doing really, really well. When you have a small win, celebrate it. What you pay attention to grows. And if you only focus on your mistakes, that's all you're gonna see, right? You get what you focus on. But if you start focusing and noticing the good stuff, the wins, the progress, the things that you are good at, then you're gonna see more of that thing too. And not only that, but it's going to continue to grow.
So every day just find one or two things that you did well. I like to reflect on that at night, right? When I put my head on the pillow, I just kind of asked myself, what did I do well today? What, what went really, really well? And even just like one small thing, like I walked 3000 steps, you know, on my walk this morning, it gives me confidence and it, it, again, plants a seed that is worth watering that will eventually, you know, turn into a, a happy place.
okay, not the place that's on my way to the golf course that kind of stressed me out. Just looking at it, right. It me want to go into dad mode. So let those things grow. Habit number three is seasonal clearing. So every week take time to actually reflect on again, what thoughts have been showing up? What are the good and what are the bad? What's serving you and what needs to go challenge those weeds that have been sticking around for a really long time, maybe causing you to
take action in a negative way, or maybe not take action at all to procrastinate and think to yourself, is this just my brain spiraling? Am I bad at school or am I just kind of attaching on to one or two tests that I didn't get a good grade in? So if you say to yourself, this person doesn't like me, is that really true? Or is it more accurate to say, you know,
Will (07:39.64)
So if.
Will (07:43.192)
So if you say, I'm bad at this sport, is that really true? Or is it more accurate to say, I need to improve with my left-handed layups? Right. If you say, I'm bad at school, is it really true? Or is it more accurate to say, I haven't learned the right, I haven't learned the right study systems yet. Right. Most weeds that are in your brain, they're there because you don't question them. We just believe everything that just kind of shows up in our brain.
or we just believe everything that everyone else says about us, but the weeds won't really survive the moment you start to question the credibility that they have or they don't have. So here's the key insight that I feel like most people miss. And I missed this for a really long time. Rejecting negativity creates more good than trying to increase positivity.
And I know I just kind of said, you know, to think about all the positive things that you're doing, but you know.
But to be honest, if we just reject some of the weeds and we pull some of the re I feel like I'm contradicting myself now. So I'm just going to skip over that.
Will (09:10.562)
most weeds don't survive questioning. I'll give you kind of an example of how this has really helped me in my life. I used to let weeds completely take over my mental garden. I'd have one bad interaction and spend the next three weeks replaying in my head how awkward I was in that specific interaction. I'd mess up in a practice and I'd convince myself that I was terrible. I had missed my first three pointer and I would never want to shoot for the rest of the season.
My mental garden was honestly a disaster, but then someone taught me this metaphor and it really, clicked, right? I wasn't broken. My garden was just kind of overgrown and I wasn't doing anything to tend to it, to make it better. So I started doing these habits. You know, I wasn't perfect with these habits, but I started to practice them daily, weeding, daily weeding, watering the good stuff, weekly reflection. And slowly things really started to shift. My mental garden got clearer.
I had way more space to think I felt lighter. And the best part was I didn't have to force myself to be positive. I just had to pull the weeds and inevitably, you know, I would start planting better seeds. So here's what I want y'all to try chat. Pick one habit of those three things and start today. Maybe it's the two minute daily check-in at night right before you go to bed. Maybe it's celebrating, you know, one or two or three small wins that you you had throughout the day. Maybe it's
know, the weekly reflection, but name one, but name one weed right now, but name to yourself one weed that you have right now. What negative thought has been looping in your head over and over and over again? Call it what it is again, naming it is like that's the battle to so commit, commit to one of these commit to one of these action steps per week. See what happens when you start really tending
to your mental garden. I promise you, you're going to feel more motivated. You're going to be more energetic. You're going to see better results and you're just going to be, you know, much prouder and, you're going to be, and you're going to start to feel, and you're going to be much prouder of yourself because I'm proud of you on the other side of this device. So thanks for listening guys.
Will (11:29.134)
commit to commit to one of these a week. See what happens when you start actually tending to your mental garden. And I promise you, you're going to feel more confident, more motivated, more energy, just more everything. Okay. That's good. And okay.
Will (11:52.846)
commit to one of these action steps per week and see what happens when you really start tending to your mental garden. Thanks so much for listening. Y'all appreciate you lots and hope you have the best day ever. Peace.