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Up Your Average is the “no nonsense” podcast made for interesting people who think differently. Learn to navigate your life with unconventional wisdom by tuning in to Keith Tyner and Doug Shrieve every week.
Expanding your world can happen at any place, any time. But I think there's a certain level of intentionality too is I don't want this I don't want this dogma to shrink my world. I don't want this opinion to shrink my world. I don't want this decision to be the final shrinking of my world. Like, if you choose to quit working and retire, that is gonna absolutely shrink your world.
Keith:Welcome to the Up Your Average podcast where Keith and Doug give no nonsense advice to level up your life. So buckle up and listen closely to Up Your Average. Good morning, Doug. Word up. It's another great day in the neighborhood.
Keith:I just keep thinking it's a great day to be alive. I can't get that song out of my head. I don't know why.
Doug:I don't even know who sings that.
Keith:Travis Tritt.
Doug:Oh, that's right.
Keith:Travis I like this song so much, but I couldn't part with $40 to go see him at the state fair, so I just played it on YouTube.
Doug:I sat fourth row of a heavy metal concert last night. I got home. I don't know what time. But my favorite part about this heavy metal concert, and it was heavy, the guitarist was a clean-cut guy. No tattoos, nothing against tattoo, no tattoos, hair combed, kind of like mine.
Doug:And I and he smiled. He smiled so big. Now he'd be serious, but then he'd smile and had a great smile. And I just had to look this guy up, and it turns out he's a businessman, 50 years old. And, he he got invited to play on this rock band.
Doug:I know. So the adventures of life can take you some to some great places.
Keith:They can actually grow your world. And and I I have been pondering. I don't even know if I told you this, that maybe I would work remotely and be a chaplain for heavy metal bands.
Doug:Yeah. We would all I think, Libby, Caleb, Amanda, Phil, we'd all
Keith:agree you should work remotely as soon as possible. Yeah. Heavy metal. Yeah. I I've gone to a heavy metal concert and didn't sit in the stands very long.
Keith:I'd just say it was a lot for it was a lot
Doug:for me. Oh, yeah. I had earplugs in. I I Keith, I had coffee. I mean, these my neighbors, they my neighborhood my neighbor guys, we all went.
Doug:Okay. And I was drinking coffee, and so I was the dad.
Keith:I love it. I love it. Yes. So, yeah, I have done that once, and we were even talking about Libby going to concerts, but that was one of my few concerts in 2024. Happy metal.
Doug:Yeah.
Keith:Well, I wanted to talk today about growing your world because my friend Larry May has helped me over the years grow my world. And we were having a conversation years ago and the essence of what he told me is that the bigger your world gets, the smaller your problems seem. And when he told me this, he said it I wrote down exactly what he said to me. And and but I I that was my filtering it down there. He said, your world should expand as you mature.
Keith:The more we look at ourselves, the smaller our world gets, and we get smaller the smaller our world gets, the bigger small things get. And so I started thinking about that. And with that idea, John Jeter, you know that name?
Doug:Great man.
Keith:John helped me discover this principle back in the mid 90s. No, it was the mid 80s actually. And when John did that, I don't even know that he knew that he was teaching me that, but I was a normal day at work for me would be cold calling all day. Oh, yeah. If you've got problems in your world, try cold calling for a day.
Keith:See how big your problems get. And so this is the diagram that I would suggest with this principle that Larry showed me that the problems are that small circle. And then if your world is just wrapped around your problems, there's just not much margin. And so I would I would get in and dial, you know, the old phones with the cord, and people would hang up on me. They'd talk about my mom and my heritage and all those things.
Keith:You know the feeling. I do. Yeah. And that is a very problematic place to live. Pretty defeating.
Keith:Yes. And John took an interest in me, he said, hey, Keith. I'm starting this singles group at our church. Do you think you could call five people a week for me and check on how they're doing and invite and just make sure they feel comfortable coming back next week?
Doug:Yeah. Okay.
Keith:Yeah. I mean, I'm calling
Doug:No problem.
Keith:I'm calling a couple 100 people.
Doug:That's like are easy those are easy calls.
Keith:Right. Right. And and then if I spread them out, I only had to call one person a day. And so when I did one person a day, I would just check I'd get to know them. And what I discovered is that my problems are real small.
Keith:The more I talk to people about what's going on in their world, my problem of cold calling is a problem, but they had other things going on. And I could tell several of those that they had let their problems become their world. And so you could literally even make this diagram smaller. Yeah. You're you're you're there can be no margin between your problems and your world.
Keith:And so when Larry said you have to grow your world, then I started thinking about that. And this is kind of a picture of what that could look like, is that if your world gets small, your problems don't really change in size. And with that, you've got other things to to direct your thoughts. And, you know, one of the things that we say repeatedly is think differently. And so part of the way you think differently is give yourself other things to think about other than what you're dwelling at the point in time.
Keith:And so the best way I could kind of think to show you these ideas was a mirror. The more time you look at a mirror, you're looking inwardly, and that's gonna contract your world view. You're gonna see things all about yourself. And if you want to expand, I put the globe there. The the globe, the more you see things around the world, the more you're gonna see a bigger world.
Keith:And and so in the the vein of that, I started thinking, well, what is the world? Because it's not the globe. Your world is not the globe. And so I define the world with these ideas. It could be bigger than this.
Keith:I put your worldview, people, places, things, ideas, which would continue it would include like opinions and dogmas. And that that's kind of conceptually what I'd say your world is, is is those kind of things. And then a worldview, which our friend Ray talked about a few weeks ago, it would be the nature of reality for you. It would be human purpose. What's your purpose?
Keith:Knowledge and truth would be part of your worldview. Morality would be part of your worldview. And then destiny. And this one a lot of these things involve time and space, but the destiny would be, do you have a temporal worldview? Like, is seventy or eighty years all you have, or is there an eternal worldview?
Keith:And all these things to be seen to expand your world. What what would you say like on the worldview thing about the nature of reality, human purpose, truth?
Doug:I I I think expanding your your worldviews just starts with people. And so it just that's it. It just ends starts with people and ends with people. And so you could spend your your globe. When was the last time you saw a globe on a desk?
Doug:Do you have a globe on a desk or something like
Keith:on my Connie put a globe on my bookstand at home or bookshelf. Yeah. But who even needs a bookshelf anymore? You know? Like, all that's kinda ridiculous.
Doug:The spinning globe is just cool. But so so you could spin the globe globe and point somewhere, and there's somebody there that you would like to know. So, one of the things I'm doing, I think I shared this with you, Keith, is I don't know what to think about Israel and and and Palestine and Gaza and all that stuff, but I've started to specifically pray for a 50 year old dude. I'm 50. 50 year old dude living in Gaza.
Doug:He's got problems up and down his bloodline, and I wanna get real with that guy. And the only way I know to do it is just through prayer that God will send the message to the dude. So that is one relationship that I have with somebody that I've never met, but it helps me expand my worldview. And I was thinking about this topic this morning as I was at the coffee shop. My new barista there, she moved here from LA.
Doug:Nice. And so Yes.
Keith:And she has a little bit different worldview than it.
Doug:Probably. But we both love an Americano. And so, you know, just being able to to be curious and say, hey. Well, how's how's how's Indy treating you? You know, just just listening to somebody and and, having connection points with somebody.
Doug:That's just the best way to expand your worldview.
Keith:I I remember And you
Doug:can change. You don't have to keep the same thought all the time. Like, you could have posted something on social media a year ago, and you're allowed to change your mind.
Keith:Well and and I I was just thinking of a time where I got to watch you change your worldview. I can't remember how many years ago it was. I I had introduced you to my friend, Neb Hayden, who came and spoke, and he was talking about what does what is the average Muslim person in the world thinking about today? And I don't know if you can remember that story, what happened that night for you, but it was I I I just watched you have a worldview change that. I well, you told me about it the next few days.
Doug:Yeah. And and I think, you know, I go back to, you know, what do I know about anybody? And, really, we're all just trying to provide for our families at the end of the day. And so, yeah, I I can't remember specifically what Ned sparked in me, but but I'm sure it was I'm sure it
Keith:was great. Well, that night, you you hadn't shared his opinion, and you it started snowing that night. Oh, that's right.
Doug:I forgot all about that. Yeah. My friend my friend Devin. Yeah. Devin was in the car with me, and it was a snowstorm.
Keith:And I think it snowed almost a foot. Like, it was a big snowstorm, period.
Doug:Yeah. And and we were at Crestina Hill, and there was a car that had slid off into the ditch. And and I said, oh, Devin, let's let's help these people. At the time, I had a Land Cruiser or
Keith:a Suburban. And you had just been told, well, open your mind
Doug:about Muslim people. Just been told to open my mind about Muslim people. And and this dude, I go up to the window, and this guy's like, the car is in the ditch. And I'm like, I know. I see that.
Doug:And then, like, you know, my heart melted because I looked in the back seats, and there was two little girls, and they had two Domino's pizza boxes in between them. Dude was just trying to get pizza.
Keith:It's 10:00 at night. This one, like, 06:00 at night either.
Doug:Yeah. And so, like, yes, we saved the day, but but it it was really all about these people adding tons of life and energy to me by just God placing them there.
Keith:Yeah. And and Thank you for remembering that. Yeah. No. It it even like, the the more I can think that I don't want to shrink my world, I think our culture life itself will shrink our world because when we quit working, our our coworkers are part of our world, and that part of our world shrinks.
Keith:And it's hard sometimes to plug in somewhere else that might expand your world again. So life has a tendency of shrinking our world and being aware of that and willing to keep trying to expand your world. Because I I thought a lot my uncle was kind of destined to a chair most of his last year or two, but even in that, I pondered, like, how might I, if that were me, expand my world at that point? Because you you have nurses coming in. You got cleaning people coming in, and that's your world.
Keith:And you can make the best of that, I think, if you have a mindset that I need to keep my world big.
Doug:Yeah. And just even looking for the bright side. I know that's a Pollyanna ish type thing, but optimism optimism is so good. So a a friend of mine was recently in a pretty bad place in that, like, location where he could not leave. And and he told me, but you know what?
Doug:The dinners weren't bad. And so there's something there's something out there to being optimistic and trying to find the good or maybe trying to even serve somebody, giving them a chair or just a smile, whatever, it it can change somebody's worldview.
Keith:And and one one way that I I changed my worldview, which I mentioned morality as a part of a worldview. Morality is such a subjective gray area that that the more I tighten the screws on my morality, the the more it pushes people out of my world. And I'm not saying that I have to just say everything goes. I'm just saying that you don't know the whole story about how somebody got into the situation they are. And the more that I can accept them independent of my own morality, the more that I can have people in my life that live life differently than me, and those people in my world have a tendency to expand my world.
Doug:Yeah. Well, our our clients have really allowed us to see the world because when you retire, what are some of your dreams? I wanna travel more. If you ask anybody, hey. What are you gonna do when you stop working?
Doug:I'm gonna travel more, and some actually do. And I can think of this friend of ours. She lives on the West Coast in Oregon, and she's she's traveled a lot. And and she thinks a little differently than I do. And I think it's because she's seen some stuff that I just haven't seen yet.
Doug:And so planning yourself in a location on that globe just might be a great use of your time and money for the sole purpose of expanding the way you think.
Keith:Well, I I would even offer to you to consider what if you bought 10 different globes and put them on a table.
Doug:Okay. What are you doing now? Ten ten globes.
Keith:10 globes. Like, you had to buy them at your yard and
Doug:say Okay.
Keith:You didn't buy them You didn't buy them at the store. Okay. I mean, bought 10 different globes. But those would the all 10 of them would be different because people in there had such different world views. They were willing to kill over those.
Doug:Yeah. It's true. So the Okay. I see what you're saying. I see what you're saying.
Keith:They're not gonna I don't think you could if you bought them at different times, I don't think they would be the same globe. Right?
Doug:Yeah. That's true.
Keith:And it's all because of a point of view for which somebody is willing to die over. Right. And that's that's one of the things that I said, your dogma. And dogma is a strong opinion, and it doesn't necessarily have to be right. And so if you realize that your strong opinions could be wrong, You have to be you have to have a certain level of humility and probably the willingness to say I'm sorry, like when you did realize that my dogma was wrong because I think that's probably what's enabled my world to grow is I've become, I think, less dogmatic.
Keith:There's certain things I'm just not gonna let go that I'm not gonna yield, but there's things that I thought as a younger man that just aren't so. Right. And there are things I thought as a younger man that the world around me doesn't think or so that I know or so too.
Doug:Like, even within the last six months, I I've had opinion changes.
Keith:Yeah.
Doug:And so I I think that's that's growth.
Keith:Yeah. Yeah. And and so the dogma is definitely gonna shrink your world, I think. And so your worldview is part of your world. Your people, places, things are part of your world.
Keith:And I I wanted to kinda use this week as an on ramp to have some other discussions. There are people that I wanna introduce our friends to and have discussions with them, maybe on things that I don't even completely agree, but to talk about them and hear what they think about them so that we can help up your average about ideas that are maybe outside of your scope of thought at this point. Let me share another. This is this is kind of what I could best describe about this concept of expanding your world. Just gotta figure out which one.
Keith:There it is. So this is the same as the last slide. And I just put some ideas that can expand your world, your time frame, your being thoughtful, travel, you mentioned, wisdom and courage. And then some of the antinodes of that would tend to shrink your world.
Doug:Keith, did you ever get National Geographic? Like or did you look at it in school or anything?
Keith:I I felt like my grandmother might have had it.
Doug:I was sharing the story of how I mowed I mowed mister Fletcher's lawn earlier this week. And mister Fletcher, he developed some dementia, and he paid me with National Geographic's interesting pictures in some of those.
Keith:Think do that anymore, did it? I don't know. I I I think you had me subscribe to it or somebody Yeah. I did. More.
Doug:No. I did too. It it or maybe it's Ken, but I was excited about it. And so just this week, my son LJ and I, we hung out with one of his co interns and her dad. And guess what he was?
Doug:He was a photographer for National Geographic. I said, you're like the secret life of Walter Mitty. You're that guy, like traveling to take the shot of the bear or whatever. But, like, I see what you have up here, and and some of us just can't get out.
Keith:Get out of our our house. Oh. Get out. Like your homebound?
Doug:Yeah. Your
Keith:homebound. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Doug:You know? Maybe
Keith:Not all those will
Doug:But but, like, something it could be a National Geographic. It it could be a picture. Like, to think that you could travel, you could expand some of your thoughts, like, just from opening a book. Or Like, that's one thing I I I would add on there. I would add a book or a magazine or, you know Yeah.
Doug:Maybe a move maybe a movie.
Keith:Yeah. Our friend that used to make those glass angels, what was her first name?
Doug:Helen. Helen. Sweet Helen.
Keith:Helen couldn't get out as much, but the way she would travel is go on Google Maps and pull up the the the view of
Doug:it. So cool. Yeah.
Keith:That was how she
Doug:And that's just curiosity.
Keith:Right. Right. And and so I realized many months ago that my dogma would shrink my world. Like, the expression of my dogma. If I tell everybody my dogmatic thoughts that people don't want to hear that.
Keith:It doesn't mean that I can't cling to some of those, but the more I express those, the smaller my world's gonna get. But like my uncle was stuck in that recliner. He he could get around with his walker and things, but part of his thoughtfulness was he had a catchphrase, keep smiling. Mhmm. And he would tell that to everybody because a lot of times people in your world won't be smiling.
Keith:And something as simple as a smile can expand your world and maybe help turn somebody else's around. You never know. I thought
Doug:What's underneath dogma there or dogmatic?
Keith:Confined. Okay. That's what I was saying. You if you're uncle Bill, you're gonna you're not gonna be able to travel as much. You're gonna be more confined.
Keith:So your world you can't control how much your world gets confined at that point in time, but you can offset it with some other thoughts.
Doug:And in that confinement, you can have so many noises coming in to support a, maybe a a not too well thought out worldview or someone else's worldview just coming in your living room through your YouTube or TV or whatever. I So saying no to
Keith:I had to confine my world for for, I think, of almost a decade of the nineties. I confined my world because I wanted to get other thoughts out of it. I I realized I had thoughts that had become become beliefs that weren't necessarily more. They might have even come to the level of dogma. And so I confined my world to get all those thoughts out of there to rethink what I thought, which it's kind of a weird idea to expand your world, but it helped probably without the nineties, I'd have a really confined world.
Keith:Because if you were taught something when you were 15 that's not true Yeah. And you cling to that the rest of your life and and you you you just drop soldiers around the way. You just take people out all over that thing. There's an old saying, you shut down the truth and those truth will set you free. Well, it's talking about a lie that's stored in your head.
Keith:And if that lie is there your whole life, you can confine yourself just out of ignorance. Yeah. And and the nineties is when I had to kinda liberate myself. And then you wouldn't think I was only in my, like, twenties and thirties then. You wouldn't think I'd have that many confining thoughts, but I did.
Keith:But I would think even today, the way that stuff is targeted via, like, the the search engines that they read confirmation bias, they just keep giving you the same thoughts. It's kinda hard to unleash yourself from some of those thoughts that constrain your future.
Doug:And I again, I think that's where the personal connection comes in. I see you have fears down there, and I can think of a a view that I had, during COVID. We were invited to go to New York City as a family, watch my son march in the Macy's Day Parade. And, one of our sweet friends allowed us to stay at her place there, and I called her. And I said, hey.
Doug:Is it safe to ride on the subway? And she's like, oh my gosh. What are you thinking? You're such a Midwesterner. And and you you think that because you hear stories, and maybe you even know somebody.
Doug:I know somebody who got punched in sucker punched in the face on the subway. And so the fears start to take over, but it helps to dive into somebody else's view who's actually been there and doing that. And she basically was like, get on the subway. And we did. Whole family.
Keith:I think I think that time frame thing helps me with fears as well. Like, I I I think I crossed over many years ago from a, like, a a lifespan time frame to an eternal time frame, the way that I process things. And
Doug:Yeah. I I would say you're probably amongst my friends, like, when we talk about that with real decisions, like, you're you're pretty focused eternal time frame.
Keith:And and what it did is it just helped get rid of most of my fears. Like like Yeah. I I know I'm gonna die. And if if death scares me so much, it shrinks my courage. And I won't do things I'm supposed to do.
Keith:And and I I just have a confidence that I really wanna get I wanna live to the fullest. And we had a friend that passed last week and I talked to his son at the visitation yesterday and I'm sorry for laughing, but his son told me a story. He says, dad had a brand new snorkeling mask on and he died snorkeling face down looking down at the fish. And I'm like I mean, we're all going. Right?
Keith:Like I when he told me, I just smiled. I'm like, dude, I don't even know what to say about that. Like, don't get to pick that thing. But I know when I went scuba diving in the early nineteen nineties, it was a little scary, like, to to think about the idea of putting this on and going below. And and yet when I overcame that fear, my my world was expanded beyond anything I ever knew.
Keith:I had no idea of the beauty below the surface of the water. I I I kinda conceptually had it, but I saw things and colors that I've never seen anywhere else. Yeah. And it changed my life forever.
Doug:And you'd do it again. Pardon me? Would you do it again?
Keith:I would do it again, but it even expanded my pooh pooh god to us. Like, I couldn't believe
Doug:Right.
Keith:Like, I had seen a lot of things above water, I but couldn't even believe the grandeur of what I've just seen below the water. And I would had I never put on a snorkeling mask and jumped in that water, I would have never seen that, I
Doug:don't think. This is this topic is one of the beautiful things about aging and maturing is just being willing to say, I might be wrong on that one. Absolutely. How could I think differently about this? Even if I think I'm right, what does the opposing crowd say, or or what does someone else think about this?
Doug:And could I be wrong? Did you ever take a speech and debate class?
Keith:I took speech, and I was horrible at it. But debate? No.
Doug:Man, that was like my favorite course in college. And you had to learn to argue another side. And it's so helpful to just be able to think, what what does the person who loves to scuba dive? What do they like about this? And teach me what you like.
Doug:What what what jazzes you about math or or whatever the subject is? And maybe it could help you move the needle.
Keith:Absolutely. The the idea of stepping back from your point of view and maybe shifting your position and getting a little different angle on it, I think can expand your world. You don't
Doug:Did you mean to dry draw an eyeball there?
Keith:Is that what that is?
Doug:That's what I see. I see it. I see an eyeball. And what's so cool about that is we're talking about your worldview and scene.
Keith:Yeah. I did not. Yeah. I could've I guess I could darken that in and had the people, but, like, even that makes me think of our friends coming. Right?
Doug:Yeah. Yeah. Walk by faith, not by sight.
Keith:Yeah. Yeah. And the idea of expanding your world can happen at any place, any time. But I think there's a certain level of intentionality too, is I don't want this dogma to shrink my world. I don't want this opinion to shrink my world.
Keith:I don't want this decision to be the final shrinking of my world. You're gonna make decisions. Like, if you choose to quit working and retire, that is gonna absolutely shrink your world. So you may have to
Doug:Guess you're not around people.
Keith:Right. So you may may have to be full of thought or thoughtful. How will I replace that social component of my world? And that there there is a constant force reducing your social network. Right?
Doug:Yeah. Yeah.
Keith:Yeah. And so how do I expand my world on a constant basis? And my guess is there are young people that need a hand. There are
Doug:Well, one of our new best friends is 33 years older than me.
Keith:Yes. He is. Yes. He is.
Doug:And so he's got some young friends. Yes.
Keith:And and I I this week, I've been focused on the idea of reading. And I think of my friend Barbara who turns 90 in a few weeks. And one of the things that we've talked about over the years that Barbara will help little kids learn to read.
Doug:That's cool.
Keith:And that is maybe one of the greatest skills somebody can learn is to read. And and maybe if you got time to help somebody read, maybe you could do that today. There's probably you go to your local grade school and say, can I help somebody learn to read? And they probably even have the resources to help you, but you can change another person's world. We had little Ellie was in our house last night.
Keith:I don't even know how old she was, but her big o dark eyes just stared at me, and she was wanting to share something with me. She had found one of Caleb's cars and was wanting to share it with me. The only thing I can give her back was a smile. I gave Ellie a smile back, and and I think we both expanded one another's world. But with with this topic, I just am looking forward to some of the conversations we're gonna have, some ideas that I had.
Keith:I mentioned how John Jeter helped expand my world. I wanna talk in future conversations about the time you took my daughter Kristen to Ukraine and how that expanded my And Ben. Ben. Ben's coming to town, and it expanded his world. Caleb and Olivia are taking the Dale Carnegie class.
Keith:That expanded my world. I didn't wanna do that. Failure has expanded my world in ways that I could never have guessed. And I want to close today that our coworker Sue told us a story about her husband. He just had days to live.
Keith:Right.
Doug:Yeah. He was on hospice.
Keith:He was literally in a hospice bed, and he rallied. And
Doug:He had a bounce back.
Keith:He rallied. And for three weeks, bitch expanded his world because he told her to go get me a scooter.
Doug:Electric scooter. That's what every junior high kid wants.
Keith:And he rode that scooter around Fisher's, and she showed us the video of him and it made my dad.
Doug:And the best part was he was wearing a helmet.
Keith:So no matter how you expand your world, be sure to put a helmet on. Anything else, Doug?
Doug:Have fun today.
Keith:Catch you all soon. Bye bye.