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Join feminist coaches Taina Brown and Becky Mollenkamp for casual (and often deep) conversations about business, current events, politics, pop culture, and more. We’re not perfect activists or allies! These are our real-time, messy feminist perspectives on the world around us.
This podcast is for you if you find yourself asking questions like:
• Why is feminism important today?
• What is intersectional feminism?
• Can capitalism be ethical?
• What does liberation mean?
• Equity vs. equality — what's the difference and why does it matter?
• What does a Trump victory mean for my life?
• What is mutual aid?
• How do we engage in collective action?
• Can I find safety in community?
• What's a feminist approach to ... ?
• What's the feminist perspective on ...?
Becky Mollenkamp (00:01.038)
I
Taina Brown she/hers (00:02.305)
Hi.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:04.182)
I we're both kind of low energy today. But you know, keeping it messy, we're just going to show up as we are and see what happens. I don't know about you, but I find that I am. I keep sort of having these swings where I'm engaged. I'm feeling it like I turn like for recently, I felt like I was turning the corner. Depression, the fog is lifting. I'm.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:06.419)
Yeah, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (00:33.282)
going back into action mode and then I don't know in the last like 24 hours, I'm just finding myself back in this place of like, I just, why bother? I don't have the energy. I just want to hole up and hide, you know? And I kind of keep vacillating between these two places of feeling in the fight, feeling like, you know, I can't give up. And then just the other extreme of like, fuck it, I give up.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:47.35)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (00:59.722)
Yeah, yeah, I feel that. think that's a place where a lot of us are lately in just this like endless cycle. It's almost like this rinse and repeat cycle of just feeling energized and motivated and then, you know, being triggered and traumatized and needing to like check out for a little bit. So I think
the question that I've been grappling with when it comes to that is like, okay, if I know this is the cycle, then how do I give myself space for the cycle? But also, what can I do to like, not necessarily be prepared for those low moments, but.
feel more supported in those little moments, right? And I think that's different for everyone.
And I don't know what that looks like, honestly, for me right now. So, yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (02:05.46)
we're also figuring it out, right? You know, I saw something on Blue Sky today, I think it was this morning, that just is coming up to me as I think about this, which is something about the Vietnam War and the protests that were happening then and the demand for change. And someone saying it was like seven or eight years of protesting and marching and a real focused action to
Taina Brown she/hers (02:29.863)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (02:34.242)
get out of that, right? And to change policy. And there's a part of me that's like, how in the hell do we stay in a fight like this for that long? So that part, but then there's also the other part of me that's like, I think I could if I knew what I was doing, like if I knew there's a march down the street and I know when it's happening and I can go pick up my sign and I can be out there. And I think part of it right now is a little bit of this like,
Taina Brown she/hers (02:35.612)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (03:02.092)
feel like we're in the early stages of figuring all of this out. And so there lacks some of that clarity, I think the feeling of, hey, here's the thing we're doing. Here's when we're doing it. This is what it looks like. And I think that's part of why on my birthday, which was February 28th, that was the national boycott by what I don't know what they called it, but the economic blackout basically. And that day felt really good to me. And I think part of it, besides being my birthday, was because there was
Taina Brown she/hers (03:03.858)
and
Taina Brown she/hers (03:24.197)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (03:32.406)
an effort that I understood that I could participate in. knew what I was doing, how I was doing it, when I was doing it. I knew others were doing it as well. I felt like I was a part of something. And I feel like that to me is a bit of what feels lacking for me to feel, to stay energized. It's harder to stay energized when you're feeling a bit like you're floundering. And that's had me in this thought of there's no one coming to save us. We have to save ourselves.
Taina Brown she/hers (03:33.479)
Yeah
Taina Brown she/hers (03:42.94)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (03:53.522)
Hmm
Becky Mollenkamp (04:01.208)
But what does that look like? I think the Democrats have made it clear. They're not interested in leading the way. They're happy to sit back, not ruffle any feathers, not do anything that might cost them corporate donations. They're just going to sit back and kind of let others lead. And there are people starting to try and do that. That economic boycott was a great example of it. But I feel like there isn't. I'm waiting for more of that.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:03.003)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:25.945)
Done.
Taina Brown she/hers (04:29.936)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (04:30.382)
I feel like that's part of what's happening with me right now is I'm just kind of waiting for that call to action. And yes, I suppose I could be the one to create it, but the truth is I can't. I can, but I can't. I don't have the platform necessary to lead a charge like that. There are things I can do locally and I try to do those things. I'm reaching out to my politicians and I'm participating in the things that come up. I'm thinking about the ways I run my business and the way I run my household. But truth be told,
Taina Brown she/hers (04:39.106)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (04:56.77)
to lead what we need right now, to be the leader we need in this moment, it needs to be people who already have organizations created, that have systems in place, right? Or have a very large platform. And I'm neither of those things. And so guess I'm just kind of waiting for those folks to tell me what to do.
Taina Brown she/hers (05:03.6)
Yeah, I mean, I agree. I agree, Democrats are...
not doing what I think they could be doing. I think they're doing something, but I don't think it's enough. It feels really performative. And I also agree that like they're they're not going to save us. I don't.
I don't think if this election had turned out in the best case scenario, we should still have been relying on politicians to save us anyway, right? I think this is the tension that a lot of people are in right now is that we're so used to other people telling us this is the plan, this is the action that, and now we have to like figure it out for ourselves and we're not used to doing that. And so that's creating this.
skills gap basically on how to save ourselves, on how to proceed through this kind of crisis situation. so
I remember I was on a call. I don't remember if I shared this with you before, but I was on a call that, who was on that call?
Taina Brown she/hers (06:48.033)
I don't remember, it was like three or four different people. Naomi Klein, Naomi Klein was on the call and a few others, this was a few weeks ago and it was all about like, it was titled like, it was basically themed around like the global impact of like what's happening in the US right now, like trying to think of things from like a global perspective. And there were a lot of people on that call.
It was streamed on YouTube and there were, you know, on YouTube you can see like the chat where people were chatting and, you know, asking questions and sharing thoughts and stuff. And there were like a handful of like four or five people who like every couple minutes, this was a 90 minute call by the way, every like two to three minutes they were like, okay, enough talk. What should we do? What should we do? What should we do?
And like, get that frustration, but also at the same time, like, I think that attitude has gotten us where we're at right now. Like waiting on someone else to like, tell us what to do, you know, tell us how to deal with the situation. And, and then the people were responding to these individuals, like, we part, part of like you being here is part of doing something right now. Like, it's not like this, like,
Like this wasn't a call to action, this was a call to discuss. And this is part of the process of taking action. so, and that can be difficult to swallow. That can be hard to adjust your mindset around what action looks like, because we're so used to living in a world where one, results are quick, and two, like,
productivity always looks like doing something. Like productivity or progress always looks like immediate and swift and bold, you know, for lack of a better word, action. And if I've learned anything from...
Taina Brown she/hers (09:02.666)
studying about the civil rights movement and the feminist movement and all of that is that that's not what that's not the totality of what resistance looks like and we while it is incredibly frustrating to have to figure it out on our own it's also
Becky Mollenkamp (09:18.294)
Thank you.
Taina Brown she/hers (09:32.682)
an incredibly powerful place to be in, to figure it out on our own. And I think it doesn't feel powerful because there is no immediate action. There are no immediate results. And I think we just have to adjust our mindset around that. We have to adjust what our expectations are around it. And I mean...
Yeah, I don't know what else to say about that.
Becky Mollenkamp (09:59.17)
Well, I think, I mean, I hear inside that the white supremacist urgency thing, and I absolutely know that that's something I'm wrestling with. And I, comes up to me, there's a few things, one, like, of course. So of course I'm going to be feeling that. And if that is what I have, if that is the conditioning, I know the waters I swim in, what I'm used to, it's going to be hard, right? Like it is just, it is confrontational.
to be met with the realization of it isn't a problem that's solved overnight and this will take time. And that's just, that is hard. That's really hard to sit with, right? So there's grief inside of that, of like, this is what I've been made to believe that things like everything should be swift. We should be doing things quickly and urgency matters and it's not happening here. So that's hard. There's grief inside that. I am also thinking of what I just said about the Vietnam War and that it took seven to eight years.
Taina Brown she/hers (10:35.145)
.
Taina Brown she/hers (10:55.72)
Mm-hmm
Becky Mollenkamp (10:58.754)
Yes. Like, so of course it's going to take time. But then I think the other part of it is we're up against or what's happening all feels so swift, right? Like there is just every day you're inundated with like 10 more horrifying things where in any, if we weren't living in upside down world, any one of those things 20 years ago would have been
Taina Brown she/hers (11:23.76)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (11:26.644)
would have been nonstop news, would have been the end of a presidency, would have been, you know, like worldwide gasps of what's happening. And they're just the onslaught of it so quickly. And I think because it's coming so quickly, it feels even more like it doubles the feeling of needing urgent action, because you're being faced with like what feels like such urgent swift, like you're being hit in the face one after another with a wave.
Taina Brown she/hers (11:45.263)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (11:54.594)
And you're like, I just want to be able to hit back one of these things, right? And to sort of know or be told or sit in, like come to the realization that there isn't anything urgent that you can do that is not going to be a one day solution that we're not going to, you know, beat this monster in a day like that. It makes it even more difficult. It's difficult to confront the urgency thing anyway. But when it's coming at you with such a real urgency, it's like double the impact. You know what mean? Like double that. And so it's just really, really hard. And
Taina Brown she/hers (11:57.584)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:17.446)
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (12:25.454)
Yeah, it isn't something that can be solved all at once. But I do think that's probably a bit of where this vacillation comes from of like, when I get into the realization of I can't solve this today, like, and I'm in the grief part of that confrontation of that, like I get low. When I can get out of like that grief space and be in more of my logical mind and like my educated understanding of these issues to say,
Of course not, and this will be a sustained thing and nobody's coming to save me. We have to save ourselves. I can lean on my community. I can mobilize through the communities that I'm a part of. You know, I can be a part of change. Then that's where I can get into that more like excited space. And I think that's probably why I'm going back and forth, but boy, it's really hard. And I know I can't be the only one who's wrestling with all of that. Like think we all are.
Taina Brown she/hers (12:58.314)
Well.
Yeah, for sure. Yeah, definitely. Definitely. think even for seasoned organizers and activists, I think it's still a challenge, right? It's just, you know, how much of a challenge it is at the individual level. But I think it's still a challenge for everyone. Because like you said, it's like
so much is being thrown at us every single day. one thing that I've been encouraging people to do, I hosted a session a few weeks ago called Kitchen Table Talk. And I have a few others of those coming up on different topics. But like the first one that we did was on, okay, how do you deal with the barrage of information that's being thrown at you?
Well, you have to really narrow your focus, right? And what that looks like is going to be a little bit different for everyone because you basically have to decide, we're at the point where we have to decide, okay, which of the issues do I want to prioritize in terms of researching information, fighting against and...
The process that I took people through was like, pick four to five issues that you really want to focus on because there's probably like 200 things to choose from at this point. And those can look like issues that directly affect you, issues that directly affect your community. There's probably some overlap there between issues that affect you and your community at some point, right? And then...
Taina Brown she/hers (15:08.53)
Once you've narrowed it down to four or five, okay, now narrow it down to two. Absolutely no more than two. And once you narrow it down to two, then you decide, okay, how am I going to engage with these issues, right? Everything else, like don't worry about consuming information about everything else, because someone in your community is consuming that information for you, right? Someone in your community is doing that work. So curate your algorithm to...
support that, curate how you consume information to support yourself in focusing on just those two issues. Because I think if we try to consume all the information and then just fight against two issues, it's not going to feel like enough because we are taking in so much. if you get, and this takes discipline, like I have not, I have not like.
for lack of better term, perfected this model for myself. Like I'm still consuming a lot more information than I would like to about what's happening. But I think practicing narrowing our focus and trusting that other people in our community are doing the same thing, right? With issues that we may not be prioritizing at this moment is how we survive this in terms of
the amount of information that's being thrown at us, right? And you can always re-prioritize what issues you want. Like this isn't something that's like set in stone. It's not something that you're like committed to forever, but it's like, okay, right now, what are the two things that feel most urgent to me, that feel most important to me? So that way you reclaim some of that energy back so that you do have...
the, it's kind of like building a scaffold for those low moments, right? Cause whether you focus on two issues or 18 issues, those low moments are going to come. Cause that's just the nature of the world that we're living in right now. But by narrowing your focus, you can kind of build like a scaffold to just like help yourself ease in and out of those low moments. And so that's something that I've been trying to practice for the past several weeks to just
Becky Mollenkamp (17:33.339)
For the past several.
Taina Brown she/hers (17:37.999)
better manage my own energy. if I'm, I mean, we're in several different communities together outside of this podcast. And if I feel like one of those communities starts to get like, not out of control, but just like, where people are just like sharing a lot. I'm just like, okay, I'm not checking in into that. I'm not checking into that community for a couple days because I need to like, protect my energy.
And it's not that I don't care about those people where I'm like completely, it's not about canceling, it's about just taking a break, you know?
Becky Mollenkamp (18:13.004)
Yeah, we all have to protect our energy for sure right now. That's important. Something I think about too in those moments is Mr. Rogers and the idea of look for the helpers and who are the people that are like that difference between the people who are really helpful and helping in the moment versus those that are not helpful to you or helping the situation. And so I try to turn to organizations like Indivisible and
Taina Brown she/hers (18:34.609)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (18:42.69)
Working Families Party, those are both organizations that are right now mobilizing and trying to do things. They're educating, which is important, but also thinking about action. And since that's something that makes me feel better, I find it's helpful for me to look at those organizations and see what they have going on. And then I also just try to look at the, you know, I'm very disillusioned by the Democrats' response to things, but then I also can look to individuals.
Taina Brown she/hers (19:08.581)
No.
Becky Mollenkamp (19:09.612)
who are doing things. I'm trying to focus their versus on like this, the overarching issue of it not being enough and just saying who are the people are doing things. I mean, last night when we're recording this was the whatever, not state of the union, but state of the union. and you know, Al Green, representative Al Green from Texas showed what it looks like to stand up to the monster, right? To what action can look like and that it
Taina Brown she/hers (19:15.406)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (19:26.556)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (19:36.64)
In that moment, it was simple and not simple. It was not allowing lies to be told without there being, you know, someone saying, that's not okay. This is not true. This is not okay. Even to the point of saying, I will say that until you remove me from this space, you know, and others who left like Jasmine Crockett and Maxwell Frost and, know, AOC didn't leave, but you know, she's somebody else who's been showing up. Like there are those folks that are
trying to show what it can look like to use your voice. And so I also try to look at those folks to remember. And know, something I was talking about with a client yesterday and that I posted on LinkedIn is about work as activism. Because I think for a lot of us, that's another thing. And that's something I try to keep connecting back to. It's so funny how it can be a double edged sword, like when you're feeling overwhelmed by everything.
Taina Brown she/hers (20:08.747)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (20:32.65)
you feel like I find myself starting to feel checked out from my work, like, cause I'm checked out from everything. I can get easily sort of disengaged from everything. And it's helpful for me to try to remember that my work is part of my activism because I see it that way. I see that the work I'm doing with business owners to say, I'm going to reject even in the best of times, right? Even before all of this or, know, hopefully in the future to still continue to challenge what are the ways that in my business I can reject.
Taina Brown she/hers (20:35.698)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (20:45.274)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (21:01.238)
all of the capitalist conditioning, but even more so now when I think it's so critical. So try, I don't want to get so disillusioned that I disengage from my work because I think of my work as my activism. And I honestly think that all of us can think of our work as our activism because there is no separating political from personal and professional ever. But right now, like with this barrage of stuff that's coming at us, so much of it is directly affecting people's work.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:12.878)
Yeah.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (21:30.38)
And so continuing to show up and like do your work, do it with pride, challenge what's being thrown at you, that is activism. And I have to remind myself of that.
Taina Brown she/hers (21:40.058)
Yeah, yeah, that's I 100 % agree. I think no matter what your job is, like showing up and doing your job and all these things that feel mundane are
part of how we resist right now, think, getting so caught up in the drama. And we talked about this before, Like how giving up or just feeling stuck and then staying stuck is in some ways...
obeying in advance right it's like
Becky Mollenkamp (22:28.11)
We talked about that with Dr. Salazar as well, Cabrera Salazar, about that. Yeah, it is obeying and it holds.
Taina Brown she/hers (22:31.382)
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So just like go to work, have your date nights, go grocery shopping, right? It might look a little different than before, right? You might not be able to get eggs, you know, for a long time. Yeah, yeah, but work on your garden, like, you know, paint your office.
Becky Mollenkamp (22:51.683)
I would say especially grocery shopping as the tariffs are in effect and prices are going to go way up. But yes.
Becky Mollenkamp (23:03.086)
I was just gonna say that.
Taina Brown she/hers (23:04.521)
Like do the things that you plan to do, right? They might look a little bit different. It might take a little bit longer. You might have to tweak your plans a little bit, but still do the things that you plan to do because that is your human right to choose how you live your life. And the more that we give away that we give that right away by
staying in fear by staying in panic mode and saying, I'm not going to do anything until I know more or until the dust settles or whatever. Like you're giving your power away in that moment. Like I saw something on TikTok a few days ago where she was talking specifically about the movie I'm Still Here, which was nominated for several Academy Awards. it's about, I think,
It's about the fascist rise in Brazil. But she was like, you think people weren't having dinner parties during authoritarianism? You think people weren't going to school? You think people weren't just living their life? And sure, there is a certain level of privilege that comes into play into this kind of conversation in terms of when you think about like...
dinner parties or date nights or things like that. But I think whatever your mundane normal existence looks like for you, keep living that out. Whether it's dinner parties or whether it's gardening or whether it's cleaning your fucking toilet, like just do it. Do it. That's part of
Becky Mollenkamp (24:55.15)
especially that system that allows you then to have the energy to engage with continuing to fight for and help those who have less privilege to be able to do those things, right? I mean, I think that's an important part of it. It's one thing if you're the billionaire class who's only doing those things and not thinking about anyone else, but I think if those are the things that then allow you to have the energy, the capacity to be able to engage in continuing to fight over a sustained fight.
Taina Brown she/hers (25:15.027)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (25:25.134)
Cause I think, yeah, you going back to that idea of the, maybe that's part of what brought me down without me realizing it is this idea of the Vietnam war and how many years it was and same, you know, civil rights and that's continuing. Like that really has never ended, right? And that can be overwhelming, but I think it can also feel like in some ways it's good to think about, okay, if it is sustained, then I have to continue to function. I have to find ways.
Taina Brown she/hers (25:37.923)
Yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (25:52.632)
to find some joy, to find energy, because there's no way I can engage for that long if I don't. And so it's one thing if this were a five day battle, right? Well, okay then, I can give up on all the other things and just focus on that. And I think that's part of what my brain's trying to get to is like, okay, where's the thing I do to battle really hard for five days because of that urgency thing and change this. But it's not that. And so I have to disengage from that sort of thinking and shift into if it is sustained, then how do I care for myself while engaging?
Taina Brown she/hers (25:58.024)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (26:12.029)
Hmm.
Taina Brown she/hers (26:21.377)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (26:21.838)
I think that's part of it is there's that guilt piece that comes up when you're like going out for a dinner because I think I've had this conversation with so many people where we're just there's this like it's a surreal feeling the world's falling apart and here we are having a coffee chat or here I am going to dinner you know whatever the things are and it doesn't feel right so that we need to be able to remind each other no this is part of it too we have to do this or we won't be able to stay with it it's a good reminder
Taina Brown she/hers (26:45.828)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. Yeah. So, I mean, on that note, like, what are some things...
And I'm asking myself this, this is more me thinking out loud, right? Not necessarily directed at you specifically, but like, what are some mundane activities that like, or what's normal like for you that is part of the way that we just take our power back, you know? We continue to just have agency over.
just that everyday minutiae of decision making that we have to do.
Becky Mollenkamp (27:34.838)
Well, one thing that comes to mind for me right now, and I think it's just because, you know, financially I have concerns. I think a lot of us do about what's going on. mean, we talk about the price of eggs and everything else. And so I think part of it is like selling, you know, doing the things that you're supposed to do when you run a business, having and making creating an offer, putting that offer out there without guilt, like believing in what you're selling and thinking it will help people. Because I think that can get hard for me in these moments because I feel
Taina Brown she/hers (27:41.412)
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
Becky Mollenkamp (28:04.43)
guilty about asking people to spend money. feel I even it's that obeying in advance of like, well, no one will buy this. You shutting myself down before I even start believing these worst case scenarios without giving other people the opportunity to tell me whether or not they need that thing. They have the money for that thing. And also the piece of it just feels weird to be talking about X, Y or Z when the world's falling apart. And yet not all of my offers have to address directly the world falling apart because
Taina Brown she/hers (28:19.111)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (28:34.35)
people still have other stuff going on in their lives. I'm still coaching people through finding new jobs. It's related to what's going on, but it's not the only thing, but also even just people wanting to develop new habits that, again, even as I say that, I think all of these things in some ways do, because my work is my activism, do go back to that. So I think, again, thinking out loud, part of it is allowing myself to think that through and then being, I think those things help me feel better.
Taina Brown she/hers (28:43.823)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (28:51.855)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (29:03.99)
about an offer, because it addresses some of the concerns I have of, who needs this right now? There's bigger things going on. And to remember that even these small things are a part of the big thing in their own way, and so it's OK. So I don't know, for me, I think just conducting business and thinking of it as business as usual, I think is the problem. And allowing myself to realize it's not business as usual, and that's OK. And I can still continue to do business.
Taina Brown she/hers (29:30.152)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good one. That's a good one. Yeah. I have to keep reminding myself of that too, that like, not everybody needs coaching right now, right? But somebody does. Somebody needs coaching for whatever it is that they might be going through and
I've been trying to or I've been working on not trying to but working on like and I mean I've been in this position of just like transitioning my business in general for like the past like six or seven months. So I haven't been doing a lot of selling because I've been doing a lot of back end like work on figuring out what that looks like for me.
to just streamline the work that I do so that I can manage my energy better. But one of the things that I felt really strongly about doing is...
like hosting those kitchen table talks where we focus on a very specific way to take action every time we come together. And so, and I think I felt really strongly about it because I think as a coach, I...
I think people who are in service-based businesses like ours, people look to us sometimes for direction, right? And so there's that component of it. And not saying that I have all the answers because I absolutely do not. I'm still trying to figure out a lot of this shit myself. But also, I feel like part of my role in resisting and activism is holding space for people to figure out what their role is.
Taina Brown she/hers (31:34.867)
And so, which is why I was like, okay, let's do something, let's offer something that's a little bit different from what I normally offer for coaching to help people feel like there's a way for them to like tap in and feel a little less powerless, a little less, you know, out of control of what is happening to them and how it's affecting them. And so.
So I'm excited about that. The next one that we have coming up is actually like preparing your finances for the end of the world, basically. So I actually have, I'm not a financial person at all. Like do not ever ask me to look at your finances because I will fuck it up. But I have someone else coming in who's a financial coach to do that. And so
And I think, obviously, if you're listening, I would love for you to be a part of that. And we did not plan this out to be like plugs for what we're offering right now. But what I want to share is that my excitement over this is that it's created an opportunity for other people, yes, to tap in and figure out how to take their power back. But it's also letting me
really operate in a way that is so aligned with my values because I'm having to collaborate with my own community to offer some of these spaces. So being able to collaborate with a financial coach, right, who I'm connected with, have been connected with for a while and helping to like not shine a spotlight. Sorry.
Y'all, if you're listening, I have really bad brain fog today. So that's why it probably sounds like I'm all over the place. just lift her work up or their work up and be in a space that's really collaborative. I can't think of another word besides collaborative right now.
Taina Brown she/hers (33:59.184)
which is really aligned with my values, all that to say.
Becky Mollenkamp (34:00.187)
That's a valid word, collaborative. It's funny you're talking about the financial piece because tomorrow it'll be after we record this. I'm doing a workshop with Meg Wheeler of the Equitable Money Project for a program we're launching around finance as well. It's about debt pay down. And there was this part of me too that was thinking it's the end of the world. Why bother paying down your debt, right? That stuff gets in my head as I think about promoting this offer. And then I think
No, we still have to do the things that help because paying down your debt is one piece of helping to feel more empowered, right? Because when you don't, when you are no longer beholden to others, there is power that comes in that. And that continues to be true, even with all of this stuff that's happening around the change in leadership, there is freedom that comes from no longer owing others and being able to have your money become.
Taina Brown she/hers (34:42.745)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (34:54.19)
the resource that's only for you that you can use to protect yourself and those you love. And I do think that continues to be important. And I have to keep reminding myself of that as I go about promoting this offer. We can throw the links to both of our things then. The workshop, the live workshop we're doing is after this recording, but the actual program is something that's for sale all the time. We're just doing a live workshop every once in a while to promote it. It's just an evergreen course. But anyway, same thing where it's like, I have to remind myself.
Taina Brown she/hers (35:12.278)
Mm-hmm.
Becky Mollenkamp (35:22.894)
that there is still that these offers are still valid and doing business is still important and helping others in the ways that we do is still important. And like you doing things collaboratively and being able to work with others, you and I doing these things and the other things that we're talking about doing together. Meg and I working on this project together, Faith and I doing feminist founders together like those that community. Collective way of thinking is just so important to me. And speaking of collective thinking, it just reminds me of the last night, my
Taina Brown she/hers (35:37.621)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (35:52.59)
kid asked me what are taxes. one of his friends was talking about taxes and I think it's probably hearing his parents talking about paying taxes right now. So I told him what taxes were and I said, you know, it's the money that we all spend collectively. We all pool our money together so that we can have things like roads and fire departments and schools. And he was kind like, OK. And then I said, nobody, there's more I want to tell you. And I want you to listen to this. And I said, it's important for you to remember that we are part of a collective.
Taina Brown she/hers (35:54.579)
Yeah
Becky Mollenkamp (36:22.286)
and that we care for each other. And they said, that's part of the problem that's going on right now with Donald Trump and other people like that. They want everything to be their own, right? They don't care about others. They look at everything very much like how much money can I have? And I don't care if it means no one else has money. And he immediately thought of Elon Musk without me mentioning him. And I was like, exactly, right? They're worried about how much money can they have instead of helping everyone else. And it's really important. I want you to think about, like, we want to make sure everyone has enough.
And I just think those kinds of conversations are really important. And those, you know what, those are the mundane ways. I'm so glad this came up. Thank you, Tana, for letting me this one. I like, feel like I almost want to cry about it, because that is that reminder to me. That is my activism too. And that matters. Those conversations, all of us who are parents, but not just parents, the conversations you're having with your friends, with your family, with others who maybe have slightly different views, whatever it looks like, those moments where we are reminding each other.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:09.335)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (37:21.966)
of who we are and why this, like, you know, our shared values and the world we want to create, that is activism. And that really matters because it is also as easy as it is for me to fall into a bit of despair. It could be just as easy to say, well, I can't change anything. Why bother? Can't beat him. Might as well join him. And I see that that happens, right? Where people start to give up and then just say, well,
Taina Brown she/hers (37:23.523)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:32.385)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:46.457)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (37:51.254)
If I can't change it, I might as well try to get mine. And then that doesn't help anything. And it's important for us to remember like anything that allows you these wonderful conversations we have, anything that allows you to get checked back into your values. So you don't lose sight of that even when it's really hard or most especially when it's really hard. That is also activism and that shit counts. And I got to remember that. So I'm that I'm feeling good that I'm ending up here because I need this reminder to.
Taina Brown she/hers (37:53.537)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (38:08.503)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (38:19.776)
Not because I was feeling the, really was coming into this feeling the weight of like, just want to also, I think I have some seasonal affective disorder. It's windy and gray and snowy and rainy outside. So there's part of me that today was just like, you know what? I'm just going to curl up. I only have this call of Tyena. I'm going to curl up in a ball and like watch TV and check out. But this kind of has me re-energized to think like, no, I am doing things.
Taina Brown she/hers (38:29.729)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (38:37.343)
Yeah
Becky Mollenkamp (38:47.02)
And there are things I can do and I don't want to lose sight of that. And I do want to stay engaged. Thank you for.
Taina Brown she/hers (38:49.92)
Yeah, yeah, you're welcome. I need this reminder every day, every day, because I also have seasonal affective disorder. on, you know, I've been depressed PTSD, like all of it, every year. like just clinical depression, not just, I'm not just talking about like being like feeling sad, but and so taking my meds every day is resistance.
Becky Mollenkamp (39:20.045)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (39:20.072)
Like, you know, drinking enough water, right? Like combing my hair, brushing my teeth. Like sometimes those small acts that for someone who is chronically ill feels like a big energy suck, but doing them is really important. And I get, and sometimes you can't, sometimes you just can't when you have chronic illness. But one, one.
book that I really want to highlight that has helped me with like, just like the mundane-ness and like, figuring out how to like, make my life work for me is How to Keep House While Drowning by Casey, I forgot her last name, but she runs the accounts Struggle Care on TikTok and Instagram. Casey Davis, yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (40:12.232)
Davis. I love Davis, yes.
Taina Brown she/hers (40:15.482)
Yeah, she's a psychologist and has struggled with mental illness herself and has kids. And her whole premise is like, your house and your life should function for you, not the other way around. And so that has really helped me and just like.
divorcing the morality from the task of keeping a clean house, washing the dishes, brushing my teeth, things like that. And the other thing I was gonna say was like, fuck, I just forgot what it was.
Becky Mollenkamp (40:55.0)
Hey, that's the mess.
Taina Brown she/hers (40:56.552)
That's the mess. That's the mess. yeah, so if you are there and you're struggling with just like, really don't want to do anything, that's okay. That's okay.
Becky Mollenkamp (41:08.59)
I was gonna say also just because I'm leaving this conversation feeling a bit more re-engaged, I think it's important to always remind people it's also okay if you're not. Like, because I have just as many days where I don't get there and I do get curled up in the ball and just watch the TV and say, fuck it, I'm checking out. And that's also important. And in like you said, in some ways, that's also the activism, right? Because that is the self-care that's so important. And remembering that is just really key. But if you don't have community,
Taina Brown she/hers (41:29.64)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (41:38.574)
If you don't have people like I have Tyena and I have others that I can have these kinds of nourishing conversations with, find your people. That's also part of your activism right now is finding those people because this is going to be a slog and we need, you have to have people that you can turn to and not just to have the conversations where you bitch and moan about what's going on. Those are valid and important as well, right? We all need those, but also those people that can help you reconnect with.
Taina Brown she/hers (41:47.591)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:01.179)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (42:07.692)
your values, with what matters, with what it looks like to stay engaged, you know, who can give you compassion, like all of that, those well-rounded spaces or individuals for each of those pieces if you can't find that all in one. But I just think it's so, so important right now to find, I mean, we always need it, but we really, really need each other.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:20.049)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:27.076)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, and people you can just laugh with, you know?
Becky Mollenkamp (42:31.168)
That one too. I have that with my partner really well. And we have, I mean, I can turn him for a lot of things, but you know, him being a white Cishet man, there are pieces of this that are just, he's not the right person for me to engage with certain parts of this because he just can't understand, which is where it's important to have some other folks. So thank you for being one of those people for me. means so much.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:33.393)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:44.57)
Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (42:50.492)
Yeah, thank you for being one of those people for me. So I want to end with like, what are you looking forward to this year?
Becky Mollenkamp (43:03.66)
oooh this year! i thought you were gonna ask me like, today or this week! i'm like, i might be able to come up with something for this!
Taina Brown she/hers (43:04.623)
This year. No, this year something, yeah, something long term, right? Because we started out talking about how this is a long term strategy to resist, right? And it's, and honestly, it's long term in the context of this is life, right? I think a lot of us have just gotten so comfortable with the status quo and now the status quo has been shaken. So we realize, we actually, like we got to do something.
So that's the long-term hard fight, but what's the long-term joy that you're looking forward to this year?
Becky Mollenkamp (43:42.7)
Well, I'm just going to piggyback off of kind of what I've been talking about already, but that's probably because that's what's on my mind, which is I'm really excited to see where by the end of the year, some of these business partnerships that I'm forging that are new for me, but I'm so excited about like where they could be. What's the potential inside of those? I'm really excited to see how much money I can be making with others. I've always been making. I've always made money alone, even when I've worked for other people like.
I'm doing it in service of myself and just like very focused on singular individual goals. And to have this new approach that I'm so excited about it, like collectively engaging in earning a living with others. I'm really excited, like where, what difference that may make by the end of the year and how my financial picture looks compared to the past and how much better I think it will feel to have gotten there, if that makes sense. So like, I'm just really excited about some of the collaborative projects that I have going on.
Taina Brown she/hers (44:12.89)
Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (44:40.622)
to see how that changes the way I think about and conduct business moving forward. How about you?
Taina Brown she/hers (44:46.052)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. What I hear you saying is that what I'm hearing you say that you aren't saying is that it's something that feels so values aligned for you that you're excited to see the impact of that on your business in general.
Becky Mollenkamp (45:04.238)
Yeah, because it's new and I'm just, this is really the first year. I mean, I've had little bits, but this is the first year I've been like, I'm doing almost nothing in my business anymore alone, other than my one-on-one coaching work, because it's just me coaching. But every other offer I have in my business right now is with others. I feel energized. guess I'm already feeling it's exciting, but I'm excited to see by the end of the year how it actually ends up paying off financially. It's paying dividends already internally.
Taina Brown she/hers (45:17.398)
Yeah, yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (45:22.977)
That's cool.
Taina Brown she/hers (45:31.945)
Yeah. Yeah.
Becky Mollenkamp (45:34.286)
But I'm excited to see like, where does that lead to financially? And I hope that it is equally in line with how I'm feeling about it. Yeah, and what about you?
Taina Brown she/hers (45:36.607)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (45:41.463)
Yeah, yeah, that's super cool. I actually have three friends who are engaged right now. So I have some weddings coming up this year that I'm really looking forward to and someone, my wife's little cousin who is 16, she's about to be 17 next month. Jesus, God, I've known her since she was four. But we're really close to her and
She is in this program that they help match her to a college and stuff. And so even though she lives on the West Coast, she's going to be on the East Coast doing college visits in a couple months. And so I'm excited to be able to, since we're on the East Coast, to connect with her and see her in person because we haven't seen her in a few years. So yeah, so weddings and kids who used to be children.
growing up and going to college, that's making me feel really sentimental all of a sudden.
Becky Mollenkamp (46:48.578)
As they say, they grow up fast. And as parents, I know the truth of the days are long and the years are short. And so I feel you. Well, that's hopefully I hope 2025 ends up being like, I hope we can all find our joy and we keep remembering to find our joy amongst everything else. So thank you for helping me do that. I appreciate it.
Taina Brown she/hers (46:51.05)
They do.
Taina Brown she/hers (46:56.383)
Yeah. Yeah.
Taina Brown she/hers (47:07.445)
Yeah. Always. Always.
Becky Mollenkamp (47:12.046)
We'll be back in your ear holes next week. Maybe something lighter. We'll see.
Taina Brown she/hers (47:16.211)
Yes.
Becky Mollenkamp (47:18.658)
Bye bye.